


Children of The Wind

by Ashratherose



Series: Dancing on the Wind [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: All other relationships are background, All the tags from the first one, Alpha Levi, Depression, Eren still has the struggles, Established Relationship, F/M, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Inflation, Knotting, M/M, MPREG themes, Marriage, Mentions of abortion and miscarriage, Omega Eren, Omegaverse, Pregnant Sex, Sex, Surgery, Switching, Trigger warnings for self harm, arse eating and rimming, but you know when you hit that stage in relationship when every thing is so mundane? Mood, butchered court scenes, he has improved, he's a shit and a daddy boy, intentional wetting, just like Klance, matching necklaces, noncon, pregnacy complications, set two and a half years after DOTW, settling down, soft Levi, soft eren, viren is 2 years and 9months
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-09-22 05:01:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 30
Words: 202,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17053631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashratherose/pseuds/Ashratherose
Summary: What happens after the happily ever after Levi gave Eren in the hotel?Reality.That's what happens. Two and a half years have passed, since the end of Dancing on the Wind. Eren thought he and Levi would be married by now. That's a big fat nope and his son seems to hate him. Can our boy ever catch a break.Mood:Ron Pope - One Grain of SandAshes Remain - Right Here





	1. Chapter 1

Rolling off of him with a groan, Levi pushed himself off their bed  
"I'm going for a shower, brat. I'll be back"  
Pushing a half missed kiss to his lip, his fiancée then walked from the room, leaving Eren to clean himself up. Staring up at the ceiling, he had to wonder. Was this his life now? An alpha who fucked him with two condoms on, and left to shower the moment they were done. Sex without cuddles? Where he wore a condom and a towel under his arse? Lifting his arms up, he held them above his face. The vividly pink scars staring down at him from when he'd tried to kill himself during his first heat after Viren's birth. 

It wasn't really his fault. 

Three doctors had missed the scarring that had damaged the opening to his left slick glands, that's why he'd been producing minimal slick. Terrified of falling pregnant, he'd begged Levi to leave him alone during his heat. His anxieties making him physically sick at the thought of sex. Levi had reluctantly left him, taking Viren to Hanji's. At the time, he didn't know he'd be waking up a few hours later to find between his legs covered in thick oozing blood from the gland rupturing, nor did he know his omega would go into meltdown because his body wasn't functioning properly. He didn't even remember taking to his wrists. Apparently, he'd called Erwin completely out of it and sobbing for Levi to help save him from Reiner and Zeke. In turn, Erwin had brought Levi with him to check on him. By the time he woke up in hospital, Levi looked like he'd aged ten years. The alpha hadn't slept the whole time he'd been in the ICU, according to Erwin and Hanji Eren's body burning a fever so fierce he'd been placed into a medically induced coma and they'd feared brain damage. He didn't remember anything about Zeke or Reiner, Levi assuring he was safe from his fever induced delirium. His wrists had been stitched and his arse operated on while he'd been out, waking a week and a half later confused as hell.. Levi had sobbed into his shoulder, Eren feeling overwhelmed and confused by it all... nothing had really felt life-threateningly off as his heat had begun pooling in his belly. And he was under the impression he was fine, because, after all, the doctors had said so. They were supposed to be the professionals. Rubbing at his face, he supposed he needed to move to clean up. This really was his life now. When Levi proposed, he'd thought maybe they'd be married soon he'd wanted nothing more than to be Levi's legally. 2 and a half years later, zero wedding plans had been made. His bridal magazines binned when he'd realised Levi was in no rush, with the feeling thing had stalled between them. Having a pup was a handful, he also babysat Anna, Mina and Mina's little sister Anka for Marco when he couldn't get a sitter. Mina and Anna were thick as thieves and unbelievably girly. It was all princesses and pink for the pair. Four pups under 4... it was fucking chaos... He didn't even have his own room anymore, converted for when Anna needed to sleep over, and so the girls could nap during the day. Beside him, the baby monitor crackled before a tiny voice came through  
"Daddy!? Cuddles"  
Viren's small voice called for Levi, Eren snatching up how underwear as he roughly cleaned himself, arriving at the bedroom door the same time Levi did  
"Viren's awake"  
Levi kissed his cheek  
"I'll get him"  
"I'll take a shower then..."

Mumbling his reply, Eren slipped past his alpha. Viren was a "daddy's boy". Every time something happened, he wanted daddy. Eren had become used to waking up finding Viren sleeping in Levi's arms, with him on the edge of the bed. Or Viren pushing him out of Levi's lap when he really needed his alpha to calm him. He tried not to cling to Levi in front of him because honestly, he didn't know what else to do. The little boy was a determined force to be reckoned with... just like his father. There were only two times a week that Viren wanted to know him, and that was when he took him out with him... even then, it was purely because of the bus rides. After his second heat, again without Levi, he'd started on antidepressants and mood stabilisers, having to stop breastfeeding. Things had slowly improved a little over 6 months ago. He'd started doing more things he'd wanted to do. On Tuesdays, he practised Ballroom Dancing, and Thursdays were Pole Dancing classes. The dance studio he'd found taught both, as well as a dozen styles he had no idea about. A woman from his Pole Dancing Class had mentioned Ballroom, so he'd tried it out. Being told he looked absolutely charming as he danced, which he already knew. It'd helped keep his weight down, especially as he'd gained not only during his pregnancy but after being put on his stupid pills. The studio had a small crèche, which had cemented his decision to suck it up and go to class... and he must have been doing something right as they hadn't thrown him out, even 5 months later. His inheritance finally paid into his bank account, from which he'd transferred $70,000 into Levi's account thinking it could go towards their wedding... and towards repaying all the money Levi spent on him. The money that he'd kept paid for his dance classes, the crèche and food shopping as Levi was generally mentally exhausted when he came home from work. His alpha was loving, but after his second heat, Eren felt like something changed. Slowly he noticed that Levi didn't tell him he loved him a hundred times a day. His fiancée used two condoms when they had sex, though, the joke was on him. Mike and Erwin had got married two months earlier. Levi and Eren had gotten wasted and whoops, now he was pregnant again, which meant no more meds... He hadn't told Levi. He honestly didn't know what to say or do. Viren had declared he "didn't love mummy", more than once, even screaming it in Hanji's face when the woman had jokingly asked at the picnic in the park. Jean had howled with laughter for a fraction of a second, before letting out a strangled scream that made Eren howl with laughter. Mina had jumped off the table and straight into his lap feet first... His son had once hit him in the face because he'd Levi had called and he wouldn't let him talk to him. The alpha was on the other side of the damn door and wanted to know if Viren was awake because of the blood on him from work. Eren had smacked his arse for it, Levi had found them both sitting on the floor crying over it. Viren climbing into Levi's arms, while Eren was left to deal with his panic attack alone. It wasn't like he'd hit his son hard, but nope, he felt guilty as fuck over it. Even when his eyebrow bruised the next day.

Showering, he took his time clean himself properly. Levi was supposed to be home tomorrow, which worked for him. He could watch Viren for the day, and the pair wouldn't miss him at all. Despite the use of his Vitamin E cream religiously, the scars on his wrists never seemed to fade. At least not to him. He'd found a tattoo artist that was going to help cover them for him, even if the ink would fade in a few years he didn't care. Just long as they weren't quite so pink and obvious. Concealer only lasted for so long, especially when chasing after children and washing his hands what seemed to be a hundred times a day. He was going to ask Hanji to come with him, but she had a rare day off with Anna, and wanted to enjoy it before she started IVF for a second pup. She'd struggled with her decision, but ultimately, Moblit would want Anna to have sibling. Eren was going to accompany her to her appointments, though she probably wouldn't be implanted? with the embryo until the new year. Scrubbing his hair conditioner free, Eren sighed as he turned the shower off. He already felt like shit. He'd spent most of the day throwing up while Viren watched cartoons in his pyjamas. When his son had dobbed him in, it was easy enough to cover by blaming stress. He was a basket case using scent cancelling soap after all. Levi simply sighed and kissed his temple. Then organised dinner. Sex was supposed to help destress him, but once he'd come, all he'd wanted was his cuddles, followed by after knot cuddles... that he didn't get. More and more of late, he wondered why he was there.

Padding out the bathroom, he looked into Levi's room. The alpha and Viren were cuddled up together, both already having fallen asleep. They looked completely adorable together, even though he didn't belong. Continuing into what had been his room, Titan was sleeping in the middle of what had been his bed. All his stuff was still in the room, but it didn't feel like his anymore. Grabbing a fresh pair of sweats, and a loose tank top, he climbed onto the blankets that had once been his. Titan still didn't love Viren. He tolerated him... but Viren had crossed the line. The boy had found the bowl of cat food on the floor, eating it right in front of Titan, breaking the fat tom's heart. Levi had laughed about it, yet Eren felt bad for his fur baby. He moved Titan's bowls to the counter, and the fatty always got extra wet food when Eren was feeding him. He showered him with extra love and pats, curling up with him on the nights there was no space in Levi's bed for him. Titan didn't mind, he'd lay in his arms as he cried, or bop on the head, once or twice he'd licked at his tears. Titan knew all his secrets, leaving him grateful that cats couldn't talk. He'd be so screwed. Don't get him wrong. He didn't hate his son. He loved him. He loved him so fiercely it scared it him and could never hurt him. It just wasn't physically possible. He'd do anything for him. He did everything he could for him. He just didn't understand what he'd done wrong... 

*  
Woken by the sound of soft laughter from Viren, and the gruffer tones of Levi's laugh, Eren climbed out of bed. Either withdrawal or his fucked up morning sickness had left him feeling like he'd been run over. His head throbbed something vicious, while bile burned at his throat. He'd already woken in the middle of the night, nearly throwing up over Titan as he'd rushed to the bathroom. With one hand on his mouth, he unlocked his door casting a quick look towards his family before darting into the bathroom. Cooking pancakes in the kitchen, Viren was sitting on the kitchen counter laughing as Levi pretended not to notice the boy stealing the leftover chocolate chips. God. He loved chocolate, but the thought nope. So far eggs hadn't caused as much of a problem, but he was in the very early stages. He'd only taken a test because he hadn't been able to get the fact they'd fucked so thoroughly... his throbbing, leaking arse the only souvenir of the night, that and hickies that made his neck look mauled. Chasing after Viren left very little time for sex. The pup was always stumbling into their room, so privacy just wasn't happening. 

Emptying his stomach contents into the toilet, Eren really hadn't missed this. The scent of pancakes and Levi didn't help to soothe his stomach in the slightest. It was still a little early to leave for his appointment, but if he got there early enough, he might be able to see about the seconded tattoo he wanted... Flushing the mess away, he screeched as he rose to find Levi standing in the doorway. With Viren, Levi would spend hours on the floor with him, holding him close. Kissing his neck and rubbing his stomach, and generally making him feel a hundred times better  
"Are you alright?"  
"I'm fine. I already have an appointment about it"  
"I noticed you haven't been happy lately. What's going on?"  
"I'm fine. You're imagining it"  
"Eren"  
"I'm fine. Just go back to Viren. I need to get ready"  
Levi drew his brow  
"Get ready?"  
"I just told you I have an appointment"  
"What? Today. Why didn't you tell me?"  
When did he get a fucking chance?! No. Nope. He wasn't going there  
"I just did. Besides, I looked it up. I can catch the bus from down the street"  
"I can drive you..."  
"Levi. How often do you get to spend a full day with Viren? Just look after him. I'll be fine"  
"I'm supposed to look after both of you"  
Supposed to. Yeah. Because it was a fucking job and half to look after him alone, let alone Viren on top of it  
"You don't look well"  
Walking over to him, Levi placed his hand against his forehead, Eren slapping it away before he knew what happened  
"I'm sorry. I'm fine. Just go back to Viren"  
Levi's frown deepened, his eyes searching Eren's face for an answer Eren didn't want to give  
"You can talk to me..."  
Turning from him, Eren shook his head  
"There's nothing to talk about"

Behind them came a thud, followed by a cry for "daddy!" and tears. Levi rushing out to find Viren had tried to get off the kitchen chair and face planted for his efforts. Not needed, Eren rinsed his face and brushed his teeth. He longed to rush to his pup's side. To gather him up and rock him. To press kisses to the bruises and tell him he was ok. Just like Levi was doing right now... but the times his son allowed it were few and far between. The little boy would rather push himself up and keep running than have him wipe his knees and dry his tears. Heading out of the bathroom, he walked into his old room to retrieve his clothes. Bit by bit, his clothes had migrated out of Levi's wardrobe and back into his old room. Not that Levi cared. Krista had wanted him to tell Levi about it, but wasn't that asking for attention if he did? Wasn't Levi supposed to notice? He loved his fiancée, that had only grown, so why wasn't he good enough anymore?

Dressing in black jeans and a simple white long sleeve shirt, Eren triple checked he had his phone, keys and wallet. Heading out the room, Viren was now eating his pancakes, the little boy sitting proudly in Levi's lap  
"Where are you going?"  
Didn't they just talk about this?  
"I have an appointment. I told you"  
"I said I'd take you"  
"I'm fine. I'll be back later"  
"Do you know how long you're going to be?"  
Nope. He'd never had a tattoo done before... and they had to match the ink colour to his skin...  
"Probably a few hours"  
"I thought we could spend the day together... we don't often get to do things as a family"  
Levi had gone on to do extra training, he now trained the new recruits or whatever they were, slowly phasing out of fieldwork and into more paperworky things. Eren actually didn't have a good idea, only that Levi was usually out from 7 to 7 each day, sometimes later and sometimes earlier. Regular hours which should have been nice, instead meant by the time the alpha got home, Eren was exhausted and just wanted sleep. Viren always seemed to know the moment Levi arrived home, the little boy magically appearing in the living room, after spending hours not wanting to go to bed  
"Sure. I mean... yeah. I've got to go"  
"Eren"  
"What?!"  
Snapping at Levi, Viren wasn't having it  
"Just let him gooooo already"  
Striding towards the door, Eren went about undoing all four locks  
"Brat... I'm trying to say goodbye to your mother"  
"He doesn't want to be here"  
"That's not nice to mummy"  
He didn't need to turn back to know his son would have just shrugged. His heart was starting to race as his eyes filled with tears. Struggling, he finally got the door open  
"Love you guys. Have fun"  
Closing the door before Levi could reply or come after him, wiped at his face as he cursed himself. Why did thing have to be like this?!

*  
He was right. He'd arrived at the tattoo parlour way too early, but it did give him time to check through the albums. He knew what he wanted now, and where he wanted it. He was going to get two stylised black wolf paw prints on his side, up on his ribs, with "Run with the pack" then Levi and Viren's names listed underneath. Even if Levi was planning on leaving him, he was still Viren's father and Eren's whole world. Chatting about it with one of the guys who worked there, the alpha went about combining his ideas while Eren sat in the reception area, fiddling with his phone. He'd already missed a call from Levi and had a message from Hanji asking what he was up to. He couldn't help but make the leap that Levi wanted Hanji to investigate this appointment, and that therefore, Levi didn't trust him. Messaging Hanji back, he sighed to himself  
Eren -> Hanji  
"Skydiving. Levi's home with Viren if you wanna take the kids to the park"  
His message had barely sent before the three dancing dots showed up. He was sure whoever designed phones wanted to scare the fuck out of everyone each time they were waiting for a reply  
Hanji -> Eren  
"I know. I thought we could all go out, but he said you left already. Without eating"  
Eren -> Hanji  
"I just have an appointment. He doesn't need to treat me like a kid"  
Hanji -> Eren  
"You are his brat"  
Eren -> Hanji  
"He calls Viren brat more than me. I'm Eren most of the time. Take him out. It's fine"  
Hanji -> Eren  
"Are you ok? You don't sound happy"  
Eren -> Hanji  
"No. But what's new about that. I have to go. I'm turning my phone off"  
He gave Hanji a chance to reply, the dots were already moving before he'd even sent his message  
Hanji -> Eren  
"I wanted to see you, but I guess I can make do with Levi. Message me if you need a pickup. Love you"  
Eren -> Hanji  
"I don't need a lift. Go enjoy playing with the kids. Xx"

Hell. Even Hanji told him she loved him more than Levi did. Scrolling through his messages as he waited, he was ashamed to realise he remembered every single one of them off by heart. He'd read them a thousand times. Every time he started to wonder if Levi still loved him, they were there. All the way back to when things were good and Levi sent him small messages of love. This gave him ample time to work himself up over what Levi would think... It was surprising enough that he didn't need his alpha's permission.

Getting a tattoo really didn't hurt as much as he thought it would. When the needle started, he first thought he was going to vomit on the spot. His anxieties were sky high, and all the alpha's probably would have been complaining if they studio didn't use scent cancellers. Slowly, he watched as his scars were turned from their ugly pink. It felt good to watch them go. Like he was saying goodbye to part of his mental illness. Surprised he wasn't a sobbing wreck, the artist joked about it as she worked, both of them laughing when Eren admitted he was surprised too. As carefully as she could, the woman erased the scars, until nothing was left. The area was red, but it immediately looked sooooo much better than when he'd come in. 

Returning to the reception part of the parlour, Eren paid for her work, making sure to tip her well. While he'd been being tattooed, the other alpha had finished his design for Eren's side. Eren falling in love the moment he saw it, almost "demanding" to have it done as soon as possible. Laughing at his enthusiasm, the male alpha looked to the woman who'd done his arms, talking about him like he wasn't actually there, the man finally relented, though did inform him that there may be colour loss... everything the first alpha had and that if it happened, he'd have to come back... That meant he'd have to organise a sitter for Viren, a favour he'd rather like to hold onto if he could. They were also supposed to going to Paradis next month to scatter his father's ashes... which apparently Karane's state mortuary had had, Floch getting in touch with him roughly 5 months after all the shit with Reiner had gone down to let him know... because they usually only held ashes for 6 months as it was and the investigation into The Church was still on going. He didn't know or care. They'd left him alone and that was all that mattered. 

Fuck it. 

He only really did two things for himself, and that was dancing. He was mum, or Eren, or uncle Eren the babysitter, the rest of time. It would take a few hours, but he honestly didn't care. He wanted it so badly he could taste it... Well, not literally. He'd accidentally bitten through a pen before and knew that ink tasted like shit... so maybe that expression wasn't the best to sum up his enthusiasm. But. Fuck. He couldn't remember the last time something made him this happy.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what idiot forgot a chapter

Sitting in his car, across from the plain building named Wall High, Levi may have followed Eren, or rather, he'd used the "find my friends" app to track Eren down after their play date at the park with Hanji. Hanji seemed worried about Eren, and after that morning he was too. His mate had woken up in a bad mood, before disappearing without giving him any indication of what was going on with him. For the last few months, his omega had been acting secretive. Viren had told him all about the trips he and mummy went on... trips that Eren had told him nothing about  
"Daddy, I'm sleepy"  
"I know, brat. We'll head back to the apartment soon"  
"I want to go home now!"  
Viren was so much like Eren that it was laughable. From the pout he gave, to the way he talked... it was obvious that Viren was their son  
"I'm just waiting for mummy"  
"Why? We don't need him to home"  
"Don't you want to see mummy?"  
"Nope. I have daddy. I don't need mummy"  
"Baby, you know you can't say things like that. Mummy loves you"  
"I don't neeeed mummy! I wanna go home!"  
Levi sighed to himself. He loved his son, but when he started saying he didn't need Eren... it fucking hurt. Eren had been through so much and he gave their son everything he had. That's why he took it upon himself to take care of the small pup whenever he got home from work. Watching Eren come out of the shop, his mate was accompanied by two alphas. His omega first shaking hands with a male alpha that would give both Mike and Erwin a run for their money size wise, then hugging the female alpha as if they were close. A fit of dark jealousy flared in him. Eren wasn't supposed to hugging other alpha's. Not when he barely even hugged Levi these days  
"Dad!"  
"Ok. Ok. We're going home now"  
"Awww yes! No mum!"  
Whatever Eren was up to, his fiancée hadn't noticed Levi's car across the street. Instead, he started walking down the sidewalk, slipping his headphones into place as he did. Apparently, he was fine with whatever had taken up the last 6 hours, leaving Levi pissed. Eren knew his work schedule was crazy. He knew he barely got a day off these days, and he knew whenever he did, he wanted to spend it together. Still. He'd booked whatever that was, without even clearing it with him first. Was he the only one still trying in this relationship? Starting the car, he shook his head to clear his mind. It was time to get Viren home. If he got home soon enough, he could probably make it home before Eren got home...

 

*  
Leaving the tattoo parlour, Eren was all smiles. He'd turned his phone on to take a photo of his new tattoo, and ended up taking nearly a hundred of them. It was beyond what he could have imagined and he was so fucking grateful for it. He'd even hugged the female artist. He probably would have hugged the male one too, but... he was huge and hugs didn't seem his thing. Starting down the road, he placed his headphones in. Music helped ground him when he left the house. He couldn't hear any comments or whispers directed his way. He could focus on the lyrics and just get things done. When he was with Viren, the tiny pup was like his shield. He could do anything when the boy was with him. Even if he was screaming blue murder.

Making it down to the bus stop, he'd just taken a seat when his phone started to ring. Hanji's name echoing in his ears as he pulled his phone out his pocket and answered  
"Hey, Hanji. What's up?"  
"Hello, gorgeous. I know you're busy, and I know it's Levi's day off, but I've just been called in. There's been a huge accident with mass casualties..."  
"And you need a baby sitter?"  
"Is that ok? I'm so sorry"  
"No worries. I'm not home at the moment, but I can probably find out how to catch a bus to yours"  
"You don't want to go home?"  
"Is it that obvious?"  
Hanji laughed  
"Just a little. Levi said you were in a bad mood"  
"Of course he fucking did. Whatever. Do you know what bus stops near yours?"  
"I'll come and get you"  
"I don't mind catching the bus"  
"Weeeeell. I don't actually know the buses that well out here. Just tell me where you are"  
That was so very Hanji. Looking around, he realised the street name was printed on the bus stop sign. Everything had gone from his mind when Hanji told him she'd been talking about him with Levi  
"I'm down on Freedom street, bus stooop number... 703"  
Drawing the "o" and popping the "p" Hanji let out a gasp, jumping into concerned mum mode for no reason  
"What are you doing down there? You know what doesn't matter. I'll find you"  
"Hanji. Relax. It's fine. I'm fine. Ok?. I'll be a good boy stay where I am"  
"Sorry! You're so far from home! I worry for my Honey. I'm leaving now. See you soon"

Being towards the outskirts of the city and elated over his covered scars, his 15-minute wait was gone in the blink of an eye. Cringing a little as ribs tugged, he climbed into Hanji's car with a happy sigh  
"Hey, sexy. Come here often?"  
Checking the back, Anna's car seat was empty  
"Nope. But I made an exception for you. Is Anna at home?"  
"Yeah. She was sleeping, and it's not like it's a long drive. Anyway. Tell me what you've been up to? First, you're like in the middle of nowhere, then you left me with three kids!"  
"Was the big one grumpy?"  
"Only a little. I think he was more worried about you"  
Eren huffed, tugging his belt on. He was 24, not 12  
"He doesn't need to be. I just had an appointment"  
"I know that much. Wanna tell me about it?"  
"Only if you don't tell Levi"  
"Ooooh. Secretive! I like it. What happened?"  
"I... uh... I got a tattoo"  
Pulling into the traffic, Hanji's whole face lit up as she gushed  
"That's awesome! Where abouts? Can I see?"  
The struggle was real not to blurt out about the art on his ribs. It looked so fucking amazing... trying to pick his words carefully, he barely stopped himself from telling her  
"The ones on my wrists. I found a tattoo parlour that would match my skin colour and tattoo over them. The ink will fade probably, but not for a while, and I know it probably isn't that exciting to you, but I feel better now they're gone"  
"Oh, sweetie. I would have been there if you'd told me"  
"It's fine. I just wanted to do this for me and I was afraid Levi would be all like "you don't need to""  
Levi didn't seem to understand. He didn't even look after his own scar wounds, and each time he tried to get the alpha using vitamin E cream, Levi huffed it off  
"Did you tell him anything?"  
"No. Viren was up late last night and he barely gets any time with him. Besides, as I said, I didn't want to hear him trying to talk me out of it"  
"Well. I'm really happy for you. He probably will be too"  
Eren hummed... telling Levi really wasn't appealing. It was a lecture he could skip  
"I think I'm not going to bother telling him"  
Hanji gaped at him  
"You're not?"  
"No. We don't really talk about things anymore. I don't want to turn this into something"  
Hanji frowned at him, she seemed to think everything was in his head but was patient enough to listen to him vent  
"What are you going to tell him then?"  
"That I had an appointment. He doesn't need to know what for"  
"Are you sure?"  
"Hanji. I'm not fighting with you either. I'm in a really good mood right now and I don't want to fight"  
Pushing up his sleeves, he made sure the nonstick wound pad was still taped down. They said to leave it on for a couple of hours  
"We're not fighting. We're just having an unsaid conversation... but because you're so cute, I'll drop it. Sooooo... Did it hurt?"  
"Not all that much. I started drifting off while she did my wrists"  
Hanji used her left hand to ruffle his hair, the car swerving as she let out a carefree "whoops". Grinning like an idiot, she didn't even pay attention as she slowed for the red light  
"That's good. I'm so proud of you"  
"Thanks, Hanji. I'm kind of proud of me too. Hey, can we get food on the way?"  
"Hell yeah! What do you feel like?"  
"I feel like an omega. All soft and squishy"  
Hanji laughed at his bad joke as if he'd never dropped it on her before  
"Fine. Whatever we find, we eat!"  
"Sounds good to me. I'm paying"  
"Ooooh! I'm so going to make you regret it!"  
"Not even. Consider it payment for coming and getting me, and giving me some time away from Levi"  
"You know I'm going to make you talk to me about whatever's going on between you two"  
"Nothing's going on between us"  
"That's not true"  
"It kind of is. Hanji, he doesn't even want to get married anymore. And when he's home, he's with Viren. Last night we had sex for the first time in weeks. He used two condoms... yeah. No. I don't want to talk about it. And thanks for making me depressed all over again"  
"Honey! Why didn't you tell me?!"  
"That I'm not getting any? Or that my son hates me?"  
"He doesn't hate you"  
"I was sick yesterday and told him not to tell Levi. Don't give me that, it's just stress. Straight up tells Levi I've been puking all day. Told Levi it was stress. That was it"  
"You usually don't want a fuss made"  
"There's not making a fuss, and there's not making a fuss. I can't even cuddle him without Viren getting angry. He's working crazy hours so we don't get to talk. Sex is just sex. We don't even cuddle. I can't remember the last time we had a real conversation. I'm just done, Hanji. He still doesn't know I'm dancing again... he didn't even say anything about me losing weight. I seriously think it's over and I'm kind of thinking of moving out"  
"We both know you're not going to move out"  
Eren sighed. Stupid fucking word vomit. All it took was a little attention from two alpha's and Hanji to pull her mum magic, and bam! His secrets spilt!  
"No... I wouldn't. I'm sorry..."  
"You know, if things are rough, you should really be talking to Levi"  
"He works too much... and when he's not, Viren takes up all his time... I don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to take him away from Viren, but I don't know if we're still like dating or just sleeping together"  
"Honey, you really need to talk to Levi"  
"I just told you I can't..."  
"You're engaged to be married"  
"I think sometimes you're the only one who thinks that. I binned all my wedding stuff"  
"But... what?! Do you know how many hours I've spent mentally planning your wedding!?"  
"Probably as many as I used to"  
Rubbing at his face, his smile was finally starting to fade  
"I've got the dress, the cake and the decorations all planned out. And the song for yours and Levi's first dance!"  
"It won't be happening within the next year, I can tell you that much"  
"You don't know that"  
"I kind of do..."  
He was pregnant after all... even after the birth, they'd be busy... he wouldn't make much of a blushing bride covered in vomit and suckling a pup  
"Nope! I refuse to wait that long! Tell me one good reason I should wait? You can't, can you?"  
He wasn't ready to tell anyone he was pregnant yet... not until after his first trimester passed. As it was, he was hanging out for his 11th week so he could get all his tests done and out the way  
"I suppose not"  
"Excellent! You should talk to Anna about this. She'll make you the prettiest princess in the world"  
Anna's make up skills rivalled a clown's... with lipstick on his cheeks... it wasn't the kind of blushing bride he wanted to be  
"If anything, I'd be doing her makeup"  
"And mine..."  
"Who said you were invited?"  
Hanji faked insult  
"You wouldn't let your matchmaker go?! Do I need to remind you that you met at my hen's night?"  
"Where I fell off the stage and Levi rushed to save me. Yeah. I know. I vaguely remember being there"  
"Nooo. You were pulled off the stage and landed on the glass! You can't forget the minor details... like how you hit on Levi and told him he looks constipated"  
"Hanji, I've heard this story a million times. Look, Hanji! Food!"

Pointing at the nearest drive through, he didn't really care what it was, along as it was food. If Levi knew he was pregnant, he never would have made it out the house... at least he was still taking vitamin pills, so the pup wasn't going without. Ordering a burger and fries, Hanji got herself a milkshake, which she slurred happily on the drive back to her house. The sound was irritating as fuck, but at least it shut her up. Dropping him off, he was again spared putting up with her loving meddling. She'd probably run off to dob him into Levi at the first chance she got, but fuck it. Maybe it was better that she did... Levi listened and talked to her... something he hadn't felt from his mate in... No. Nope. He wasn't going there. He was going to look after Anna, and say fuck you to the rest of the world for now. His arms were fixed. He had a tattoo that he loved. And he and Levi were just going through a rough patch. That was it. End of story. It was time to get over himself...

 

*  
Unlike Viren, Anna truly seemed to love him. The little girl spent hours brushing his hair, and doing his make up, giving him big sloppy kisses and telling him he was beautiful. She was so headstrong that it was crazy, very much like her mother and had flare for mischief. Making them dinner, they settled down on the sofa, Anna curled into his side as they picked at their very unhealthy dinner of deep fried thick cut fries. His lunch had left him craving more fries and Anna was pretty easy with food. She hated mushrooms, but Eren didn't blame her as they were revolting. She also didn't like cabbage but ate plenty of different things without complaining. Eren didn't let Viren get away with not eating everything on his plate, neither did Levi. Dinner with vegetables was the one time the boy actually resented his father. Though he was much more likely to listen to Levi than him.

"Eren. Car"  
As headlights illuminated the living room, Eren pressed a kiss to the top of Anna thick brown hair  
"So it is. You're such a smart little girl"  
"Mummy?"  
"No, it's too early to be mummy. It might be Uncle Erwin..."  
Anna sighed placing her hand on her hip, in a way that only a three-year-old could pull off  
"I don't like Uncle Erwin. His eyebrows are weird and he snores soooooooo loudly"  
Eren had to fight not to laugh at Anna's very serious declaration  
"Anna, it's not nice to say you don't like someone. You love your uncle Erwin"  
The girl huffed, so fucking much like Hanji  
"Fine. But he has weird eyebrows. They're big wriggly caterpillars"  
The girl stubbornly kept going until she got as close to caterpillar as she was going to get, scooping her off the sofa, he tickled her stomach  
"Those big caterpillars are going to eat you! Nom nom nom!"  
Screeching with laughter, Anna clung to him as Eren headed to the door. Standing on the doorstep was Levi, Viren asleep in his arms. Scrunching his brow, Eren was confused  
"What are you doing here?"  
"Uncle Levi! Did you come 'cause Uncle Eren's sad?"  
Since when was he sad? Anna was way too perceptive  
"Hey, Squirt. Hanji told me you were here"  
Nodding, Eren carried Anna back to the sofa, groaning as he placed her back down. Giggling, Anna "pulled" him down with her, happily climbing onto his lap to steal more fries  
"Yeah. She got called into work and needed someone to watch Anna"  
"A head's up would have been nice. Instead, I spent the... you know what. Never mind. I'm going to take Viren up and get him settled in Hanji's room"  
"Just settle him down on the sofa. He'll be fine. Miss Anna here is going to bed soon"  
"No, Uncle Eren!"  
"Yesss. You've had your bath, then you get to sleep in mum's bed tonight"  
"But you'll leave before we can play dolls"  
Eren bopped the tip of Anna's nose  
"I'll be here all night and we can play tomorrow"  
"Promise?"  
Holding up her pinky, Anna had been well schooled in the binding contract of a pinky promise. Not thinking about it, Eren shook pinkies, his left sleeve sliding down to reveal the changed dressing on his arm. The moment he looked up to Levi, he knew his alpha had seen and that he was in the shit over it  
"Yeah, Princess. I promise. Baby, I need to talk to Uncle Levi. Can you be a good girl and wait here?"  
"Is this because you're sad?"  
"I'm not sad, honey"  
"Are you sure? You didn't answer Uncle Levi's call before"  
He'd forgotten about that... why couldn't kids keep secrets... not that he had anything to hide  
"That's because I was cooking the fries, and it wasn't safe not to watch them. Not with you in the kitchen. Levi, it really wasn't on purpose"  
"It's fine. Like you said. We should talk"  
Levi didn't sound impressed... great. He didn't want to have a fucking fight with the kids around  
"Uncle Levi, Viren can sleep in my bed. I'm sleeping in mummy's"  
"That's very nice of you Anna. We'll be right back. You just watch your cartoons"

Settling Viren into Anna's bed, their son didn't even stir. Kissing and smoothing down his hair, Levi turned serious as his gaze turned to Eren  
"Want to tell me what all this was about?"  
"Not in front of the kids"  
"Oh. So you're actually willing to talk to me?"  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"It means you took off this morning. You ignored my call and I had to wait for Hanji to message me, to find out you weren't coming home tonight!"  
Whisper yelling at him, the pair moved out of Anna's room. Eren walking over and sitting on the top stair so he could hear what Anna was up to  
"I thought you'd be fine with Viren"  
"Really? You thought my one day off meant you could go off and do as you want"  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"Are you hurting yourself again? Is that why your arms are dressed? Is that why Hanji had to bring you here?"  
Snatching Eren's left arm, Levi shoved his sleeve up before ripping off his dressing  
"What..."  
"I'm not fucking hurting myself. But it's nice to know that's all you think of me!"  
"Then why are your arms dressed? Who were you meeting with? Who was that female alpha you were hugging"  
Eren felt like he'd physically been bashed over the head. Levi had what? Followed him?!  
"You fucking followed me?! Oh. Right. I'm just a fucking basket case. Heaven forbid I do something for myself"  
"Don't be like that. You know that's not what I'm saying"  
"Do you really want to fucking know?! I had my scars fucking tattooed today. Ok. Are you happy? I couldn't stand looking at them, so I had them covered. I didn't think you'd give two shits, so I didn't tell you. It's nice to know how little you trust me!"  
"You had your scars covered?"  
Snatching his arm back, Eren tore off the other waterproof dressing on his right forearm. Out of the pair, most of the damage had been on the right side, now it was almost all gone, other than the thin scar rises  
"Yeah. Ok. Maybe I didn't want to keep thinking about the fact I tried to off myself and couldn't remember"  
"Don't be like that"  
"Be like what? Angry that you decided to spy on me? Or angry that you don't trust me"  
"I do trust you"  
"Then why did you follow me?! I was finally happy again"  
"You know I don't think your scars..."  
"I know you don't care. That's why I didn't tell you. You would say it doesn't matter to you. That you loved me anyway and how my scars don't define me... I had this done for me. I had this done because I don't want our pup... to have to grow up with a mother with such obvious marks!"  
Levi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose  
"I'm sorry. You've been sick and hiding it. I thought... I thought maybe you didn't want to talk to me"  
It wasn't like he didn't want to talk to Levi. His alpha was just never home, and he hadn't wanted to have this conversation  
"I'm not sick"  
"You were vomiting from stress. If looking after Anna is too much then tell Hanji. Marco can take care of Mina and Anka. You don't need to..."  
"Oh! So now I can't even look after pups. Right"  
"For fuck's sake. That's not what I'm saying at all"  
"First you can't trust me to go an appointment on my own, without checking in on me. Then you show up here, when I legitimately forgot about your call, seeing I was busy making dinner. If you came just to have a fucking fight, then you should leave"  
"I came because I'm worried about you, brat!"  
"Don't call me that!"  
Levi lowered his hand, it hovered awkwardly like he didn't know what he wanted to do  
"I thought you liked me calling you brat"  
"Yeah. Maybe when it used to fucking mean something between us"  
Shit. Shit. Tears were welling in his eyes... and his stomach was doing flips  
"What..."  
"I think you should leave, Levi"  
"Brat..."  
"I told you not to call me that!"

"Uncle Eren?!"  
Running to the bottom of the stairs, Anna looked up at them. Eren hated that the small girl had to hear them yelling, even if they weren't swearing. He never wanted to make the girl cry. Nor Viren for that matter  
"Sorry, Princess. Uncle Levi and I were just playing. Why don't we finish watching cartoons?"  
"Ok, Uncle Eren. Is Uncle Levi staying?"  
"No, sweetheart. Just Viren. Uncle Levi has to go home for work tomorrow"  
Rising from his spit, Levi grabbed him by the elbow  
"Eren..."  
Stepping down, Eren steeled his heart. Warmth was blossoming from Levi's hold. A warmth he'd been desperately craving for so long... but Levi had followed him. He didn't trust him... the one person who always had... How was he supposed to marry this man? How was he supposed to have another pup with him? Leaning in so Anna couldn't hear, he whispered  
"I'm staying here tonight. Hanji can drop me off tomorrow. If you want, you can take Viren with you. He doesn't get to see you much as it is"  
"We're not done talking"  
"Really? I think you've made it perfectly clear what you think"  
"Why are you being like this?"  
"Being like what, Levi?"  
He could smell his own distress starting to leak through the scent cancelling spray he'd stolen out of Hanji's bathroom... he needed to get away before Levi smelt his pregnancy  
"Distant and shit. Why won't you talk to me?"  
"Because I'm tired ok. I chase after Viren nonstop. I clean the apartment. I cook the meals. I take Viren for walks and to the park with Hanji and Anna. I do everything he wants and he still wants you at the end of the day. I'm... No. That's not what I want to say. We both know he doesn't care for me the way he does you. So spend time with him. You can leave whenever you want. For now, I'm going back to Anna. At least she doesn't tell me off for doing things on my own or for myself"

Leaving Levi on the stairs, he wiped his eyes as he walked down and lifted Anna off her feet. Spinning her around, the girl planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek  
"I love you, Uncle Eren"  
"I love you too. Now. What were we watching?"  
Anna had had the horrible two's. She'd also adopted the word "dis" for a good solid 9 months. Everything was "dis is mine", something he'd thought was weird until Viren had started the same thing. Both of them were still learning their words, but he could almost always figure out what they meant... Still. Eren loved her. He'd do anything for the little girl like he'd do anything for Viren. He was also very careful to make sure when he was with the kids, he didn't show favouritism, or scold one without explaining what they'd done wrong. Leaning in, Anna "whispered" barbie  
"Barbie? I think we can do that"  
"Uncle Levi? Can't you staaaay? Uncle Eren, can't he stay? Pleeeeease"  
How was he supposed to say no to Anna's wide brown eyes  
"Ok. It's up to Uncle Levi though"  
"Uncle Levi?"  
Walking down the stairs, Levi placed his hand on Anna's head  
"I suppose I can. But you have to head to bed soon"  
"Noooo... Eren said"  
"When the movie finishes, honey. Come on. You need to finish your dinner"  
Fuck Levi. Just. Fuck him.

Anna fell asleep in his arms before the movie finished. Lifting the little girl, he carried her upstairs without paying any attention to Levi. Walking into Hanji's room, he rolled his eyes at the state of the mess in there. The rest of her house had been much the same, so he'd cleaned while Anna tried her hardest to keep his attention on her. Laying her down on the spare side, at least Hanji would be spared if there happened to be night nappy accident. With a kiss to the forehead, he retrieved Anna's plush puppy from under the end of Hanji's bed. Where the girl lost it over a week again. Why couldn't things be this good with Viren? He adored his pup. But never got love in return. Heading into her bathroom, Eren took care of his before bed rituals, choosing to hold off showering until he was back in the apartment. He was very much in his own head when Levi appeared in the doorway with a slight cough. Brushing past him, Eren walked over to Hanji's bed  
"Eren. Can we please just talk? I don't want things to be like this between us"  
"We're fine. There's nothing to talk about"  
"Since when did you stop liking being called brat? And why didn't you tell me? I don't know what's going on if you don't talk to me"  
"Levi. Stop it. It's fine. I was mad because you didn't trust me. And now I'm past it"  
He really wasn't... and despite his actions, he wasn't tired  
"Then..."  
Levi sounded so hopeful. Making Eren feel even more of a dick. Levi wanted to talk for a change. He should have been jumping for joy, but all his pent up frustrations were getting the better of his mouth  
"Then we're good. You might as well go home. You've got work tomorrow"  
"But..."  
"Levi. Just go. It's fine. We're fine. I totally overreacted"  
Leaving his jeans on, Eren climbed into Hanji's spot. Anna mumbling in her sleep as she moved closer to him  
"Alright. I guess I'll go then. I'll see you at home tomorrow, right?"  
"Yeah. It depends on Hanji's schedule. Viren's got clothes here, so don't worry about that"  
As were some of his... No. he couldn't just move himself in. He needed Levi...  
"Ok. I... uh... love you"  
"You too. Stay safe"  
Rolling his back towards Levi, he cut off conversation. He was exhausted, and it was barely after 7... He'd stay until Anna was settle properly, then find something to do...

 

*  
Driving home, Levi was a wreck. He'd kept it together until he was out of Hanji's house, but the moment he stepped off the front veranda and onto the path, tears formed in his eyes. Eren had ever right to be mad at him. He'd jumped to the wrong conclusions over his mate's activities... it was just... he never thought Eren would have anything tattooed. Let alone his scars. He hated looking at them on his otherwise flawless mate, but only because it reminded him of the fact he could have lost him. He loved Eren. He loved him so much it fucking hurt. Spending the night away from him hurt. He ached to go back to him. To beg him to talk to him. They'd spent nearly the whole day apart, especially given the fact Eren hadn't come back to bed with them. He didn't know what was on the omega's mind anymore. But making Eren cry had never been his intention. When he'd seen the fresh dressings, his heart had begun to race, as his stomach dropped. Eren had come so far, but he still panic attacks. He still had nightmares and nights he couldn't sleep... and apparently, he had things he felt he couldn't tell him... like the fact "brat" no longer meant anything between them. It'd been his name for him... so why did he hate it now? He just... he didn't understand.

Arriving home, Levi called through to work. Eren was right. He was always busy with work, and Viren. They were supposed to be going away next month... but they couldn't go with things fractured like this. They were flying down because Viren had never been on a plane. They'd talked about driving, but Levi had booked the plane tickets with their pup in mind. Eren was in a much better mental state than last time... or so he thought. When had thing started going so wrong!? His mate complained they didn't talk, yet when he tried, Eren closed down. There'd been a personal change over, resulting in them being appointed a new boss, and his promotion. Unlike his dickhead of an old boss, his new boss actually seemed to understand the issues of having an omega mate... probably because she had one herself. Eren hadn't needed him to take time off work in months... No. the little shit had gone back to hiding his panic attacks, and locking himself away when he felt sick... explaining that he needed a few days, he still needed to work his shift tomorrow as she wouldn't be able to find someone on such short notice, but after that, he'd have Friday, Saturday and Sunday free. An actual proper weekend where he could spend time with his family. Finally. It wasn't her fault he'd been so slammed. No. That honour belonged to the shitstain named Reiner, and the wankstain of old age. His body hurt. His hand cramped in cold weather, while the bullet near his spine had shifted closer. If he wanted to be there for his son, to teach him how to ride a bike, or drive a car, he needed to slow down. For someone who'd always been fairly physically active, he couldn't cope with the idea of losing the use of his legs. He knew there were plenty of people in wheelchairs doing amazing things every day... but he just... it scared... ok. He was fucking terrified of the day he woke to find he couldn't move on his own. That's why going on holiday and doing all the things he could with Viren and Eren mattered so much... Ending the call, he tossed his phone aside. He'd really fucked up with Eren... His mate practically ran the household. Eren was the one who filled out the appointments planner on the fridge. Who spent hours chasing after Viren, and Titan. Who cleaned the house, and left him little "love you" and "stay safe" notes in his lunch. They still hadn't fallen into a new routine that seemed to work, not in the last 6 months at any rate. He'd become almost compliant around the house. He'd do the dinner dishes, and clean through the house at night... while Eren took care of everything else. He was to blame. He'd driven Eren to this coldness... He'd always prided himself on his quick thinking mind... so how had missed all the signs?

Cleaning through their apartment, he slowly counted up the little things that had changed over the years. The photos of them were gone from the fridge, replaced by photos of Viren and Anna as they grew. The photos of them on the living room walls had been replaced by photos of him and Viren, or picnics with Marco and Hanji. The snacks that he'd used to buy just for his mate, now sat on "Viren's" shelf in the pantry. Eren's shelf bare from anything personal. His omega's beloved blankets now laid across Viren's bed in the boy's room, or on his bed under the mountain of pink from Anna's repeated visits. Retrieving their clothes from the drier, Eren's clothes were old and faded. He couldn't remember the last time his mate had bought himself new clothes... sorting Viren's from theirs, every small garment had been carefully chosen. All in Viren's favourite colours, or printed with things the little boy loved... Eren knew it all... Setting them aside, he carried their clothes to their room, his intention to hang Eren's things in his wardrobe, but opening it, he found only his clothes in there. There wasn't even a stray shirt or sock belonging to his mate. He couldn't smell Eren in there at all... When did they start to fall apart? Did Eren even want to have sex with him? Or had he forced himself on his mate? Eren was his hope. His future and his everything. His mate was absolutely everything he'd ever wanted... So, why had he left him to feel so alone? How many panic attacks had he missed? How many tears hadn't he noticed? God. No wonder Eren wanted to stay at Hanji's. He'd been calling out for love, only for Levi to miss all the signs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This idiot right here!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now three is actually 3... fml. Sorry guys. I should be editing through these tomorrow. Then I'm off again... just got home from a trip down to Perth, and now I'm off to Carnarvon on Sunday. Incidentally, the plantations of Paradis Beach was based on Carnarvon...

Carrying a grumpy Viren up to their apartment, his son hadn't been too happy to wake in Anna's room, and even less happy to find Levi wasn't at Hanji's anymore. The boy had thrown the mother of tantrums, setting Anna off with him... though both of them had been pretty shocked when he'd thrown a tantrum of his own back. Sitting on the floor, Eren had burst into tears, unable to stop himself after brushing Levi off so coldly the night before. Eren bitterly regretted his actions, but his stubborn nature had stopped him from messaging his mate. He'd needed to cool his head and let everything blow over before coming home again. For his part, Levi messaged him goodnight, but Eren's phone had been downstairs on charge, still in the kitchen from making dinner for himself and Anna. Letting them in, Viren was out his arms the moment he saw Levi. Crying joyously for his daddy as he raced to throw himself in his lap. Personally, the omega had hoped Levi would still be at work, though he had spent the whole day at Hanji's due to her work schedule and his lack of knowledge over public busses. Even running around in the backyard with the kids hadn't left him the good kind of exhausted. Not like Pole Dancing class did. Hanji looking absolutely exhausted as she gave him a lift back into the city. From the lingering scent of blood and vomit on her, she hadn't had the best shift at work. Throwing his keys into the bowl, Eren walked through the living room to drop down on the edge of the recliner, thanks to the blob that was Titan taking up the rest of the room. Kissing Viren's soft black hair, Levi looked over the boy to him  
"How was Hanji?"  
"Shi-she had a bad shift. She's just going to go home and crash. You?"  
"Much the same. I'm off for the weekend though. I thought we could do something together"  
"I thought you were working"  
"After last night, I thought we should talk"  
Ugh. Eren didn't want to talk... he'd take a years worth of sleeping... Climbing up from his spot, Titan arched his back as stretched, before dropping back down and clawing at Eren's pants. Scratching the tom's head, Titan looked smug as fuck over the attention   
"Eren?"  
"Yeah. Sure. Whatever you say. I need a shower. Viren had dinner at Hanji's. He still needs to take a bath"  
"You go shower, then I'll give him his bath"  
Rubbing Titan's back, Eren poking his tongue out at the fur cling to his fingers  
"I think I'll give Titan his bath tomorrow. His fur's all knotted again"  
"I can do it. I'm off remember"  
"No. It's alright. He's my fur baby too. You just spend time with Viren, he needs his dad"  
More than he needs his mum at any rate. Looking away from Viren snuggling into Levi's hold like he hadn't been a shit all day, Eren shoved down his ugly feelings. That used to be him. He used to have the right to climb into Levi's lap whenever he needed... but that was long gone. Pushing himself up, Eren headed into the bathroom, frowning at the lingering scent of bleach. Levi must have cleaned through the apartment... It wasn't like he didn't clean during the day. He always tried to keep things an organised chaos. He had no idea how some parents had spotlessly clean houses. All it took was half a minute being distracted, and bam! Viren was off and into something else. Ugh. He wanted to sleep. Levi might want to talk, but right now, sleep was calling his name.

 

*  
Bath time with Viren was as eventful as usual. The boy loved the water, he never wanted to get out... it was getting him in that was the problem. Especially when he hadn't seen him all day and had to fill Levi in on every little thing with exaggerated detail. Tonight, Levi's mind just wasn't in there. Viren splashing water all over him for not paying attention, cutting bath time short. His son howling as he lifted him out the bath and smacked his arse for misbehaving. Bundling him up, he carried his son through to his room. The door to Eren's old room was shut, Levi having paused briefly to check it was unlocked on the way past. It was. That was something. Drying his son off, he got him into bed, where he was begged for a bedtime story. Viren's bedroom was much the same as when they'd first painted the nursery, the small differences was that the rug on the floor was now red, and the unicorn had migrated to Eren's old room. His son's favourite colour was red after all.

With his throat sore from reading his stubborn son to sleep, Levi left the door cracked so he could hear the boy if he needed him. Heading over to Eren's room, he let himself in, only to find his omega sleeping. Curled into a small ball on the far side of the bed, Eren looked vulnerable... and completely miserable. He'd noticed the linger hues of pain when he'd cleaned the room earlier, despite having opened the window to air the room, his pain still lingered. Climbing under the blankets, Levi shuffled over to Eren's side, snaking an arm around his mate's waist and pulling him up to him so he could bury his face in Eren's hair. Taking a deep breath of his love's scent, he wished Eren was awake to hear his words   
"I love you, Eren. I'm sorry I fucked up... I didn't even notice... but please, don't leave me"

It was the middle of the night when Eren woke, the omega shooting up in bed, before vomiting across the stop sheets. Initially confused, Levi swore as he gathered Eren up as he continued to vomit. Rubbing his arm with his left hand, Levi's right hand was on Eren's forehead. His fiancée was drenched in a sickly sweat. Emptying his stomach contents until he was left dry heaving, Eren slumped against him  
"Nightmare?"  
Eren nodded against him, mumbling as he replied  
"Sorry"  
"It's ok... why didn't you tell me you were still sick?"  
"It's not important. What are you doing in here?"  
"You came in here instead of to our bed"  
Eren dry heaved again, spitting a mouthful of spit into the mess he was trying to bundle up. Levi was more worried about his mate than the condition of the sea of blankets  
"Oh... I was pretty tired"  
So he hadn't done it intentionally?  
"Sorry, Levi. I'll take care of this. You just go back to bed"  
"I've got it. In the morning, I'll make you a doctor's appointment, if I can't get one, we'll go see Hanji or Mike, yeah?"  
"Don't bother. I have one before we leave"  
Pulling out his hold, Eren sighed deeply as he pushed his soiled blankets into a pile  
"I'm going to put these in the wash"  
"Eren, just wait. We need to talk about things"  
"Things are fine, Levi"  
"Things aren't fine. You're sick and you won't talk to me about it. You've moved all your things out my wardrobe and you're shutting me out"  
"Things are fine, Levi. It's fine. I'm fine. You're fine. Viren's fine. Everything is fine"  
Climbing off the bed, Eren made towards the door. Scrambling off, Levi moved to stop him at the door  
"What is going on with you? Seriously. I'm trying to talk to you"  
"There's nothing going on. Don't worry about it"  
"Stop being a brat and tell me"  
"There's nothing to tell! I feel sick. I made a fucking appointment. Big fucking deal"  
"You're not telling me everything"  
"Of course I'm fucking not. You know what. I'm not having this fight. I just wanted to sleep. I just woke up from throwing up. I don't feel well and I don't want to talk about it. I don't have anything to say"  
"You're angry at me... do you want to leave? Is that it? Have I not being enough attention to you? You moved your clothes out our room. Your photos are gone from the fridge and the living room. You're going out and getting tattoos without telling me... stop shutting me out"  
"Not every fucking thing is about you! And I moved my clothes out months ago. There's no space... no. Uh-uh I'm not going into it..."  
Levi physically jerked back. Months... Eren moved his clothes out months ago? He didn't understand why. He'd been doing everything his fiancée wanted. He didn't want to spend his heats with him, so Levi had ignored his own pain and gave him his space... Speaking of space... there was no space for what? He didn't get it... and Eren hadn't said he didn't want to leave. The alpha's heart was hammering in his chest   
"No. Whatever it is, just spit it out already. You're not happy. Tell me what's going on with you"  
"Even if we talked it wouldn't change anything"  
"So something is going on?"  
"Look, Levi. Some things you can change, and some things you can't. I'm fucked in the head and my own son wants nothing to do with me. I don't blame him. Who'd want a mother who tried to kill himself?"  
"Eren, that wasn't your fault. You were hallucinating from the fever"  
"Really, Levi? Because lately I've been thinking it would have been for the fucking best that I didn't make it! Shit. I really didn't want to talk about this. But you just couldn't leave it alone..."

"Daddy?"  
Emerging from his room, Viren rubbed at his face. The small boy lit by his bedroom light behind him. Eren shook his head, the bundle in his arms catching the focus of his scowl  
"Go look after Viren. He wants his dad"  
"You could go for a change"  
Eren let out a broken laugh   
"That's all I do and he's never wanted me. You know what, if you're home, then I don't even need to be here. He'd be happier if I was gone"  
"Don't... don't say that"  
"Daddy?"  
"I'm not whisper fighting with you in front of him. He doesn't need to know his mother's even more useless than he thinks he is"  
Brushing past him, Eren headed to the laundry, while Viren padded over to him. Reaching up, Levi lifted his son into his arms  
"Hey, brat. What are you doing awake?"  
"I heard mummy yelling"  
"Oh, baby. Mummy was only telling daddy off"  
"Why?"  
"Because daddy did something bad"  
"Mummy does the bad thing. Daddy is the best"  
Blinking at his son, it occurred to him that this what Eren meant. It was always "dad" and "daddy", never mummy  
"Mummy's right this time. He loves us so much that sometimes daddy needs him to tell him when he makes a mistake"  
"Daddy doesn't make mistakes"  
"Daddy makes plenty of mistakes"  
Brushing Viren's hair back from his face, he kissed his son's forehead  
"Let's get you back to bed"  
"I want to sleep with daddy"  
"Not tonight, baby. Mummy isn't feeling well"  
"I want daddy"  
"Mummy needs daddy"  
"No! I want daddy!"  
"Hey. No. You don't get to yell"  
"I want my dad! I don't want mum!"  
Levi flinched, Eren looked physically hurt as he stood in the doorway  
"No. You, don't ever say that about your mum again"  
"Levi, it's fine"  
"It's not fine and it's no ok!"  
"Just take him to bed. I'm going to ask Hanji if I can stay there"  
"What? No. You're not leaving"  
"It's better if I do. Don't worry Viren, daddy's going to stay with you"  
"No. Viren is sleeping in his bed tonight, and you're sleeping in ours"  
"I'm staying with you"  
"Viren"  
"No!"  
"Viren. Stop it. You're being naughty right now"  
"I want my daddy!"  
The small boy screamed as he headbutted Levi. Marching over to Viren's room, he placed him down and smacked his bum  
"You're sleeping in your own bed tonight. Tomorrow we'll go to the park, but only if you stay in your own bed tonight"  
"No! Daddy!"  
God. The kid made it hard. Levi was weak for his tears. He felt like a shit father, but this was completely unacceptable  
"Go to bed, Viren"  
Stepping out of Viren's room, he pulled the door closed. His son screaming up a storm as he bashed against it and screamed for him.

"Levi, just let him sleep with you. It's not worth the tantrum"  
"It is if it teaches him to respect his mother"  
"He misses you. You're his whole world"  
"And what about you? What about what you need?"  
"I'm fine. I can take care of myself"  
"Eren, no. You're not fine"  
"I'm sorry, but I am. I can handle myself. I'm going to catch a taxi out to Hanji's. We both could use some space"  
"I didn't take time off work only for you to leave"  
"Then maybe you shouldn't have taken time off work"  
Was Eren serious right now? He'd complained he didn't spend enough time at home, and now his fiancée wanted to leave?  
"Are you shitting me. I took time off work to be there for you"  
"I didn't ask you too"  
"I did it because I love you"  
"Then, if you love me, you'll let me go to Hanji's. I can't deal with this right now. It was wrong to come home"  
"You're not going anywhere"  
Striding into the bathroom, Eren reemerged with his wallet, before darting into his bedroom to retrieve his phone   
"I'm going to Hanji's"  
"You can't go to Hanji's"  
"Then I'll go to Mike and Erwin's!"  
"Why the fuck do you want to go so badly?!"  
"Because there's no fucking space here for me! If you hadn't decided to stalk me, you wouldn't have even noticed I'd had my scars covered! You never notice me anymore! You fuck me, then you roll off me and you go and shower. When's the last time you made the fucking effort to stick around?! I barely get to see you because I'm always with Viren, and the whole time I am, all he wants is you. My own son doesn't even love me! You don't even love me!"  
"I do love you!"  
"Do you Levi? Because from where I'm standing, it doesn't feel like it! I'm staying with Hanji. At least she calls me gorgeous and beautiful without me asking for attention! She actually wants to know how I'm going! She doesn't suddenly start asking when I get sick. Just stay here with your son, because he sure as hell doesn't want me in his life"

Tears were rolling down Eren's face as the omega rushed to the front door. Releasing the handle to Viren's door, he moved to the front door, pushing Eren back from it. Stumbling, Eren landing on his arse with a pained yelp. Shit... fuck... Squatting down, he reached towards Eren, Eren moving away from his outstretched hand with a low whine of fear. He hadn't meant... he didn't want to hurt Eren. He just wanted his omega to talk to him. To help him. To figure this out together  
"Eren, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to"  
"It's fine, Levi"  
"It's not fine! Stop saying everything is fine"  
"Fine! It is what it is then"  
"I didn't mean to make you feel like you didn't belong here"  
"I need some space. I'll be staying with Hanji. Spend some real time with your son"  
Levi swallowed hard... he didn't want Eren to go  
"If I say I want you to say, would you?"  
"Maybe... if I didn't think this was for the best. Maybe all of this was for the best. You stalking me. You having a go at me for having my scars covered. Maybe this was all for the best"  
"Don't say that..."  
"I do love you. I love you more than you could ever know, but I can't... I can't keep feeling like this. It's been months and I'm tired, Levi. I'm so fucking tired"  
"If you're going to Hanji's, let me drive you"  
"You can't"  
"You can't go out smelling like that"  
His instincts and his alpha were going crazy. His alpha wanted him to throw him on the bed, and lock him away from the world... He wanted to snuggle into his mate and hold him as he cried. He wanted to pepper kisses to his lips until he'd fixed all of Eren's pain. The change in his mate must have been slow and gradual, or he would have noticed his hurt feelings through their bond...   
"Then I'll ask Mike to pick me up"  
Levi took a deep breath, releasing it slowly and hating the way Eren's face lit up with hope as he slowly spoke   
"I'll call Mike and see if he can pick you up now. If he can't, then I will drive you to Hanji's my self in the morning. Is that ok?"  
Eren nodded, wrapping his arms around his knees as he waited.

With Mike working, Erwin came to collect Eren. His friend looked just as confused as Levi felt about everything happening. At the start of the week, he'd thought they were fine. Apparently not so after all.

 

*  
Three days later and Levi was sitting on a park bench. His final day off was bright and sunny, the opposite of his mood. He'd texted Eren, but Eren had asked for space, then hadn't replied. He'd hoped they'd spend time together as a fucking family, but his family was apparently falling apart while he was too blind to see it. His omega was happier without him. Eren was pushing Anna on the swings, as they both laughed, while Viren was playing on the playground, his son loved the climbing frame and slide. Leaning back, Hanji had her elbows on the park table, as she looked over her shoulder at him  
"Spill. What did you do to my honey?"  
"Me. Spill? I have no fucking idea how things ended up like this"  
"You have no idea why Eren showed at my house sobbing that he'd fucked up. Right. My little sweetheart hasn't been that upset for a while. He didn't want to tell me about it, but he's been crying himself to sleep. Did you two fight? Or did he call it off"  
"Call what off?"  
"The engagement? Your relationship? He was super distressed Levi. You know his scent doesn't bother me all that much, but it took everything I had not to pull him close and drown him in my scent"  
Levi let out a small growl. Friend or not, no one scented his mate, even for comfort  
"Don't you dare fucking touch him"  
"I wouldn't have to, if he wasn't so depressed that is. So, spill. What happened?"  
"I don't know. I really don't. I thought we were ok. I thought he was ok"  
"And now you're realising he's not?"  
"He got mad at me. He wouldn't tell me what his appointment was for... so I kind of tracked his phone"  
"You didn't trust him"  
"It wasn't that. He's been sick lately and won't let me close to him. We had sex the other night, but instead of coming back to bed after showering, he went to his room"  
"His old room"  
"What do you mean "his old room". It's still his room..."  
"Mhmm... That's why it's set up for when the girls stay over. I think you're the only one who still thought of it as his room"  
Levi let out a bitter laugh...  
"It seems like I've been thinking about things the wrong way for a long time. He moved his clothes out our room. He also took down all the photos with him in them, I couldn't find them in the apartment, and he's got it in his head that Viren hates him"  
"Viren is definitely a daddy's boy. He'd always talking about you. Never about Eren"  
"I thought that was because he spends all his time with Eren"  
"There's that... but it must be hard for Eren. It took him months to settle into being a parent, and too feel he was allowed to be. He does everything for that boy. He tells him a thousand times a day how much he loves him and how proud he is of him.... And now, his son doesn't want to know him"  
Levi sighed heavily, pushing his aviators up his nose. He'd found them hidden in the bedside table, with no memory of how they got there. Probably thanks to Eren  
"Does he say that, when he's with you?"  
"Say what?"  
"That he doesn't want Eren around?"  
"Sometimes, but kids are like that. Anna always wants Eren more, because she knows she can get away with things with him. But she's never said she doesn't love me"  
"And Viren has?"  
"You've seen him say it before. If he's on my lap and I ask him if he loves me or you, he says "yes", but "no" when it comes to Eren. I know it hurts him. He loves Viren so much, but no matter what he does, Viren won't say he loves him"  
Levi groaned, Hanji smacking his arm  
"What?"  
"Eren said there was no space for him at home. I thought maybe he was overreacting because he'd just had a nightmare and woken up vomiting... but it's just something else I've fucking missed"  
"He's welcome to stay with me"  
"I don't want him staying with you. I want him at home where he belongs"  
"Then maybe you two should talk?"  
"The last time we talked, I accidentally scared the fuck out of him"  
"Levi, he's right over there with Anna. You could literally be talking to him right now. You really do need to talk to him"  
"I know I do. But I don't know what to say"  
"Um. I'm sorry. I love you. I don't want to break our bond. I'm an idiot. I still want you. I still want to marry you"  
"Does Eren want to break our bond? Did he say that?"  
"No. But he did say he was thinking of moving out. Don't worry, he already he said he wouldn't actually move out... but as for the wedding... Why haven't you set a date yet?"  
"When have I had time. You know how Eren was that first year after Viren was born. He was fucking trying his hardest and still struggling. I wanted him to be happy and healthier"  
"He'd thrown out all his bridal magazines, even the ones I filled with post-it notes. All my dress selections and flower plans and wedding locations... I spent hours planning your wedding. If there's photos missing, I wouldn't be surprised if he threw them out too"  
"He threw them out?"  
"Yep. I know he's going to be pissed at me for telling you, but I don't like you two fighting. Not when he's come so far. Both of you deserve to be happy"  
"Maybe... Maybe we should break the bond then... if it's hurting him"  
Hanji turned to face him, her face set and her voice stern   
"Don't even think about breaking that bond. He fucking worships the ground you walk on, and you love him. You both need to fucking talk, and you need some time on your own to figure stuff out"

"Mummy!"  
Hanji snapped back to stare at Anna, the girl coming running over   
"Anna? What's wrong?"  
"Uncle Eren!"  
Pointing at the playground, Eren was sprawled on the grass  
"Anna, what happened to Uncle Eren?"  
"He stopped pushing and told me to get you"  
Gathering her crying daughter into her arms, Hanji made her way towards Eren. Levi torn between supervising his son and rushing to his mate. All it took was one wrong move for Viren to hurt himself, while Hanji was already at Eren's side. Rising from the table. It hit him all at once that he hadn't rushed to Eren's side. He'd fucking sat there... while Eren could possibly be unconscious or hurt. Feelings of self loathing filled him, his hands starting to shake. He hadn't moved. His mate was laying there, but he hadn't moved. Why hadn't he moved? Forcing himself to step over the bench seat he'd been sitting at, he walked towards Eren, before finally moving into a jog.

Laying on the grass, Hanji had Eren in the recovery position. His mate had a bloody nose, while his colour looked off. His cheeks were too pink... but that might have been sunburn. Shit. He'd made the kids keep their fluids up. He hadn't thought to tell Eren to do the same  
"Levi. Call an ambulance"  
"I. What?"  
Why was he useless?!  
"Call an ambulance. Come on. Snap out of it. He's fainted, but isn't rousing"  
"I'll take him"  
"What?"  
"I'll take him to hospital. Can you look after Viren?"  
"Levi..."  
"He's my mate. I'll take him"  
"He could have hurt himself when he fell. You're not thinking straight"  
"I said I'd take him"  
Piping up from her hiding spot, Anna was all tears  
"Is Uncle Eren dying?"  
Twisting back, Hanji pulled Anna to her  
"No, sweetie. Uncle Eren fainted"  
"Because Uncle Eren is sick?"  
"Do you know about that?"  
Anna nodded, still hidden against Hanji   
"He was sick this morning. Is he sick because of me?"  
"No, honey. If anything, you make Uncle Eren much better"  
"I don't want him to be sick"  
"Neither does mummy, but mummy and Uncle Mike are gonna make him all better. Now, do you think you can do mummy a favour? Can you check on Viren?"  
Anna nodded  
"Good girl"  
Kissing her temple, Hanji let Anna go. The girl running over to Viren. While Levi was still being completely useless. Pulling out her phone, Hanji called through to dispatch, the call taking seconds   
"They're on their way"  
"I..."  
"You need to get your shit together. Can you check his pulse?"  
She was throwing him a pity job. Taking Eren's hand in his, his omega let out a groan, pulling his hand out of Levi's hold  
"Eren? Sweetheart? It's Hanji. Can you hear me?"  
"Mmm... fuck..."  
"Language"  
Struggling, Eren tried to sit up. One hand moving to cover his eyes   
"Eren, stay still for me. You fainted"  
"I feel dizzy"  
"It's alright. Just lay back down for me. Levi can you grab me a wet wipe? He's got blood across his face"  
Another pity job. Jogging over obediently, he returned with the wet wipes, casting a glance at the kids as he did. Anna had her arm around Viren... they really shouldn't be alone. Passing the wipes to Hanji, she pulled out the first few, dabbing at Eren's nose  
"Do you still feel dizzy?"  
"A little. I think I'm dehydrated"  
"Well it is a hot day"  
"Yeah"  
"And you were throwing up again. Why didn't you tell me you're still sick?"  
"It's just a small case of food poisoning. Something in my stomach didn't agree with me"  
"And how do you know it's not a stomach bug?"  
"Because Levi, Viren and Anna aren't sick"  
Hanji laughed  
"And who's the doctor here? Hmmm?"  
"You are"  
"Exactly. Here, if you can sass me like this, you must be feeling better"  
"I'm fine"  
"I'm going to let the doctor on duty be the judge of that"  
"You didn't..."  
"I did"  
Groaning at her, Eren waved Hanji's hand off him  
"Hanji, I don't need an ambulance. Wait. Where are the kids?"  
"Anna is with Viren"  
"They need someone watching them"  
"We were until you went and fainted"  
"God. I'm always fucking something up aren't I?"  
Hanji rubbed Eren's shoulder  
"We both know that's not true"  
"Levi, go check on the kids. They shouldn't be alone"  
"I'm not leaving you like this"  
"Just go watch the kids. I'm fine with Doctor Hanji"  
The anger slipped off the tip of his tongue   
"So you'd rather be with Hanji. Ok, then"  
Hanji shot him a glare while Eren struggled up again, avoiding looking his way at all  
"Levi, don't be like that"  
"He's the one who said it. You can go with him then. I'll take the kids with me"  
"Levi..."  
"It's fine, Eren. Isn't that what you always say?"  
Replying stiffly, Levi removed himself from Eren's side. He could see Eld and Gunther in the carpark, so walked over to the kids. He already hated himself for being so shitty, and didn't need to feel even worse.

 

Taking the kids back to Hanji's, Viren was in a mood. He'd tried to put both kids down for a nap, but Anna was too worried about Eren, and Viren refused to leave his side. That was how he ended up with both kids sleeping on him. The pair drifting off while watching cartoons, Levi was too busy watching his phone as he waited to hear how Eren was. The message never came, instead a few hours passed, before a car pulled into the drive. He wanted to rush to the front door and demand to know what was happening with Eren, but that would mean disturbing the kids. He was honestly surprised that the kids wanted to climb on him as it was. He reeked of his internalised anger. Why had he hesitated before joining Hanji at Eren's side? When did he start neglecting his omega like that? And why had Eren tolerated it?! Letting themselves in, Hanji aw'd over the sight of the kids sleeping against him, while Eren stood back a little. His cheeks still dusted red  
"H-how do you feel?"  
"I'm fine. It was just a bit of dehydration and sunstroke. They gave me a drip"  
"Hanji?"  
"Yep. He was dehydrated, but he's just fine. I was telling Eren that I think you two should head home for the night and have some alone time"  
"What about the kids?"  
"Erwin can baby sit. He owes me a favour"  
"Are you sure?"  
"I think you two need to talk"  
"There's nothing to really talk about..."  
Eren was suddenly very interested in his feet  
"Eren"  
"Hanji"  
"You should tell him"  
"You should keep your mouth shut"  
"Do I need to remind you that I'm right here? Eren, what aren't you telling me"  
"It's... it's fine"  
"Eren, it's not fine"  
"And I'm saying it is. It's my body and my choice"  
Eren's evasiveness was doing nothing to make him feel better  
"Brat. What aren't you saying?"  
Eren's eyes widened at "brat", looking happy for a fraction of second before turning away from him  
"Eren. Just tell him"  
"I don't want to. God. Can't you just drop it. I'm fine. I was little dehydrated and I've been over doing things lately. I already told you"  
"For fuck's fake, spit it out. Stop getting all huffy over it"  
Turning back, Eren shot him with a frosty glare  
"I go dancing. Ok. That's where I go on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I've been going for the last 5 months. But I've been over doing it and I need to take a break. Go on. Laugh or something. Laugh at your stupid omega who can't even go dancing anymore because apparently I can't take care of myself"  
Why would he laugh about that? He knew Eren loved and missed dancing. He would have supported him if he'd just said something...  
"Why didn't you tell me?"  
"Because I stupidly wanted something for myself. You have work, but dancing was all I had for myself. Now I can't even do that"

Storming off up the stairs, Eren wasn't happy at all. Both he and Hanji winced at the sound of a door slamming   
"Why didn't he tell me?"  
"He wanted to look good for you. He was pretty upset about how his body changed after giving birth, and when he went on antidepressants. He doesn't think he belongs on your arm because he's not pretty anymore"  
"Oh for fucks sake. What other shit has he got into his head?"  
"I don't know"  
"Did you know he dances?"  
"Yeah. He asked my permission to take Anna to the crèche there. Anna wants to dance now because Eren does"  
"And you didn't tell me?"  
"He's your mate. I thought you knew. He's been working his arse off to look good for you. He thought that was why you didn't want him"  
"I never said I didn't want him"  
"You know how sensitive he is"  
"Well it's pretty fucking obvious he doesn't think he's my mate anymore. He didn't tell me anything. He never went out on the Tuesdays or Thursdays he's been home"  
"You're seriously making this about you?"  
Lifting Anna out his lap, the girl gripped her mother's shirt  
"Isn't it? It's my job to make him feel safe and comfortable. My job to make him happy and that he knows he's loved"  
Hanji sighed, rubbing Anna's small back   
"You keep saying it's your job. You're not saying that you want to make him feel any of those things. Come on Levi, you've been together for years"  
"That's what I mean. That I want him"  
"Go get him and take him home"  
"He doesn't want me to"  
"Oh my god. I'm not even dating you, but I want to dump you. He's the one feeling rejected by his mate and his son"  
"I can't just leave Viren here"  
"You can. Eren needs you. He's really upset about the dance thing"  
"So why can't he dance?"  
"I don't know. He was really upset when he came out"  
"You weren't with him?"  
"He asked if I could step out. He actually asked if you were there, so I had to explain you were with the kids"  
"Great. I just keep fucking this up! I thought we were ok, Hanji. I know he still has his bad days, but they weren't happening as often. I didn't realise it was because he was trying to distance himself from us. I don't want to lose him. I still want to marry him. I've wanted to marry him since I first met him. He's my mate. He's..."  
Eren had actually wanted him there... why was it he couldn't do anything right? And now... he could lose him all together?  
"Go get him. I'll call if anything happens with Viren"  
"Are you sure? He can be a handful"  
"We'll be fine"

Eren was in the spare room, the omega had worked himself up so much that he was mid-panic attack when Levi let himself into the room. Walking over to him, he lifted his omega off the floor, and moved to sit with him in his lap. Pushing against him, Eren was shaking his head as he tried to escape him  
"Hey. I'm here. I'm not mad. I need you to breathe for me. Come on. In and out. You're ok. You're ok"  
Eren continued to shake his head  
"Eren, stop fighting me. You need to let me help you..."  
"N-no"  
"Don't say no to me"  
Levi tried to nuzzle into Eren's neck, but his omega wasn't having it, his words falling between pants  
"Let me go"  
"I'm not letting you go"  
"You don't need me"  
"I do. More than you could ever know. I know I fucked up. I know I didn't pay enough attention to you. I know I made a mistake. I love you. You're still my fiancée. We can get married anytime you want. I love you"  
"No you don't! No one loves me!"  
Wailing into his hands, Eren finally stopped trying to escape. Burying his face in his hands, his whole frame shook. His mate was so much lighter than he remembered...  
"Brat. Don't say that"  
"Don't call me, brat. I'm not your brat anymore"  
"You said that before. I don't understand"  
"Viren is "brat". You call him "brat" all the time. You stopped calling me brat, and started calling him it. Ok. I'm not your brat. He is... I'm nothing"  
"I'm sorry... I didn't realise"  
"I know! I know you don't..."  
This wasn't calming Eren down. Sighing, Levi started to rock Eren in his lap... like he did with Viren. He hadn't meant to turn all his attention to their son, but wasn't that natural? Once a child was born, they kind of became the centre of your world  
"I shouldn't even be in your lap. He'd be angry"  
"What? Who?"  
"Viren... I shouldn't be in your lap. I don't belong there either"  
"Eren..."  
"I don't have a place by you anymore. I was always right. Once you got your p-pup you didn't need me anymore"  
"Would you stop that. I need you"  
"To take care of him... or for a fuck. You don't notice me for me anymore! You didn't notice when I cut my hair or lost weight, or when I stopped dressing like a girl. You... just noticed when I fell apart again!"  
"You never said anything"  
"H-how could I? You're always working, s-so Viren misses you all day. He climbs into your bed every night... because he needs his dad. I'm the stupid one who doesn't have a place. I'm supposed to be able to take care of myself"  
"No. No. This is on me. You're not ok..."  
"I thought if I could just make it to Paradis, it would be ok... but I can't even do that"  
"You're not supposed to be struggling. You're not supposed to feel like I don't love you"  
"But you don't..."  
Using Levi's shock against him, Eren climbed from his lap shakily, his hand clutching at his chest as his hair fell across his face   
"Eren. I do love you"  
"Stop breaking my heart. I have nothing left to give"  
"Eren"  
"Just take your son and go"

Eren's scent flared suddenly. His pain changing hues, tugging at Levi's heart as his alpha's turmoil threatened to break him apart. Covering his mouth, he tried to ignore it. But there it was. There it was coating his tongue and choking his throat. The scent of an omega trying to reject his alpha... and once again, it was happening in Hanji's house. He'd wanted Eren to talk to him, but instead he found he'd broken his mate more than he could imagine  
"Eren. You need to calm down br... omega"  
Calling Eren "brat" still felt natural... he was his brat, and so was Viren. Their brat... Sink down, Eren shook his head. Ok. So maybe he was getting slightly desperate. Moving off the bed, he hefted Eren up and into his arms  
"Right now, you're upset and you're not feeling great. But I've got you. I'm taking you home. I've fucked up, but give me a chance. I love you. I love you and I'm so sorry"  
Having finally worked himself up so much that he couldn't take a breath, Eren passed out in his hold. Either that, or he finally felt safe enough to fall apart completely. Though that was highly unlikely. 

With Eren limp against him, Levi carried him downstairs. Hanji now had both kids sleeping against her  
"Levi? Oh wow. He stinks"  
"He's trying to reject me"  
"Oh... oh, Levi"  
"He doesn't believe I love him... he thinks I just keep him around for sex and to look after Viren..."  
"Hey. No he doesn't. I know he doesn't. He's probably still feeling sick from sunstroke"  
"He's warm to touch. I'm going to take him home and get him into a cool bath"  
"Alright. I'll organise the kids tomorrow. So don't worry about it"  
"Thanks. if Viren plays up..."  
"He'll get a smacked bum"  
"Eren said he was right. That he was only needed to give birth. He said he doesn't sit my lap anymore because Viren gets upset... and he doesn't sleep in our bed because Viren is usually in it"  
"So he feels like he doesn't have his own space anymore. If you bag up Anna's things, I'll bring them home. He needs a break and chance to be young again"  
"Yeah. I might start looking into daycares for Viren... but when I mentioned the girls before, he jumped to that I thought he couldn't look after a pup"  
"If he's been feeling this way for a while, it's probably all been bottled up. He was genuinely happy to have his scars covered. Perhaps the sun stroke pushed him over?"  
"No. He'd already reached his limit without me noticing... it's time like this I wish we had parents to babysit"  
"You two haven't had much of a break, have you?"  
"The longest break Eren's had was when he ended up in hospital with that first heat... I've at least had training and work"  
"Leave it to me. I'll figure this out for you guys. Make sure you take care of my baby"  
"He still doesn't like the name "baby""  
"No, I suppose not. Take him on a date or something. Pamper him a little, and let him be a little selfish"  
"Eren can have whatever he wants. He deserves it"  
"Now you're talking"

 

*  
Eren slept like the dead. His omega didn't stir until Levi was lowering him into the bath. Blinking at him with confused eyes, Levi lightly stroked his hair  
"It's ok. We're at home"  
"We are?"  
"Yeah. Hanji's gonna baby sit for us, so we can have some us time"  
Setting his mate down, Eren drew his long legs up to his chest  
"I fucked up again"  
"You didn't. I promise. I didn't realise how bad you were feeling. Have you been taking your pills?"  
"I have a doctor's appointment coming up... I was going to talk to her then"  
"Is it on the planner? I want to be there when you go"  
"I can catch the bus"  
"Eren, you had a full blown panic attack, and tried to reject me. You need to rest"  
"Where's Viren?"  
"He's with Hanji, I just told you that"  
"Oh. Right..."  
"How do you feel?"  
"I'm fine"  
"That's not going to fly anymore. How long have you been this depressed?"  
"Since I turned 8"  
"Eren, I'm trying to figure everything out. I know the pills were helping, and I know you were feeling happier"  
"It's been... a long month"  
"Why didn't you tell me?"  
"Because you work so hard, then come home. Everything has to be perfect for you"  
"Even forcing yourself to have sex?"  
"It... you didn't force me. But it um... it doesn't matter"  
Sitting down and leaning his arm against the bathtub's lip, Levi reached out and cupped Eren's face. He really didn't look well  
"It matters to me. I can't believe I missed it all"  
"You're busy and I'm supposed to be better"  
"No. I haven't been very patient at all. I'm sorry I made you feel like I only wanted you for sex"  
"I don't know how else to feel... you don't cuddle me anymore. You climbed out of between my legs the moment your knot deflates... and not just once. It's been... it's been going on for a while now... that's if we even have sex"  
"I'm sorry"  
"You weren't supposed to know"  
"I thought you trusted me enough to tell me"  
"You're so happy with Viren. I didn't want to take that away"  
Rubbing Eren's cheek with his thumb, his omega sighed softly   
"What do you want for dinner? I'll make you anything you feel like"  
"I'm not really hungry"  
"You need to eat"  
"Levi, you can't just start caring about me again. It doesn't work that way"  
"Is that what you think? That I stopped?"  
"Didn't you?"  
"No. You're my pride and joy"  
"Viren, is your pride and joy"  
"Hey..."  
"It's true, Levi. My own son hates me... I do everything for him and he hates me"  
Fat tears rolled down Eren's face as he sniffled   
"He doesn't hate you"  
"Ask him, Levi. He does..."  
"No, he doesn't. What do you want for dinner? You need to eat"  
"Maybe just a piece of toast? I'm not hungry"  
"Toast isn't very nutritious"  
"Then I won't eat"  
"Hanji mentioned you've been having troubles with your self image. Is that why you're not eating?"  
"Hanji has a big fucking mouth. I eat"  
"How much have you eaten in the last 48 hours?"  
"I don't know. I ate. I know I ate. But I can't remember what"  
"Do you think you can drink? I can make you up a vitamin milk"  
"We don't have any powder"  
"I thought we did"  
"We haven't got a while now. I'm sorry"  
"It's alright. We can just grab some tomorrow"  
"You have work tomorrow"  
"You're more important"  
"No. I'm not"  
"Eren"  
"You can't just start babying me again. I haven't done anything. I haven't hurt myself"  
"Do you think that's all I think about you?"  
"I don't know what you're thinking anymore. It's not like we talk that much. I'm tired by the time you get home, then Viren has all your attention until you fall asleep. Then after a few hours, Viren wants to be in bed with you"  
"You don't have to stay"  
"You're not the one he starts kicking out of bed"  
Leaning over, he pulled Eren closer to him  
"Eren"  
"I don't know what you're thinking anymore. We don't talk. We don't go out like we used to. I can't remember the last time we watched a movie together. I knew things would change with a pup. But I didn't know you'd leave me"  
"I haven't left you. I'm here"  
"Levi, you can be right beside someone, and have them leave you behind. Dad did it. Zeke did it. I didn't expect you to do it too"  
Did that mean he was as bad as Eren's father and Zeke? That he'd hurt his omega that much?  
"Eren, I love you. That's never changed, even if it doesn't feel like it... I fucking love you. I want to marry you. I want all of it with you"  
"Hanji told you about the wedding magazines, didn't she?"  
"Maybe"  
"I don't want a pity wedding. You should want these things without being told. I think I want to get out of the bath now"  
"You only just got in"  
"And? I don't feel well. I want to go bed"  
"Eren"  
"Levi. Just back off. I need to be ok on my own"  
"You need to rely on me"  
Standing in the bathtub, Eren stepped over the side. Levi catching a glimpse of something black on Eren's side. Rising to his own feet, he caught Eren by the hip and right arm, lifting his arm as he turned his omega to look at his side  
"You got a tattoo? You didn't say you'd gotten this as well"  
"Maybe I would have if you hadn't made me feel so shit for getting my wrists done"  
Staring at the two wolf paw prints, he was in a state of semi-shock. It looked good. It looked really good. Fuck. It looked amazing, and his alpha glowed with pride at the fact his name was now permanently etched in Eren's skin  
"It... looks good"  
"I didn't know if I should get your name. I thought you'd be mad"  
"I'm not mad at you"  
"You keep saying that... now, can you let me go. I'm supposed to be resting"  
If Eren went to sleep, they couldn't talk and his mate really needed to get everything out... like he did   
"I... I'll make you that toast"  
"I can make my own toast. Take a shower or something. I can feed myself"  
"I want to take care of you"  
"You have a funny way of showing it"  
Levi bit his lip, releasing Eren as he did. He was trying, but Eren wasn't giving him anything.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... look at that. Chapter 4 just had its last words added to it. And here it is!

Eren didn't want to shut Levi out, but between coming off his pills, loosing dancing, being pregnant and being told he very may loose his pup from all the stress he was under, Levi's probing was way too much right now... Even if it was therapeutic to vent. Everything had hit him all at once when he'd seen Levi's concerned face at Hanji's. He hated knowing Levi was worried. He hated making him look that way. He didn't want to make his alpha feel worse, that's why he'd only told him he couldn't dance anymore, rather than that he was pregnant and could miscarry at any time. As it was, he'd have to call his Ballroom partner and let her know that he wouldn't be around for the next few weeks... knowing that he'd be letting her down. For an alpha, Sasha had all the strength, but the personality of an omega. She loved her weapons, just as much as she loved her soft things. Most of her partnerships had fallen short due to her excitable personality, leaving her wondering why she'd started dancing at all. Her husband Connie had two left feet, according to Sasha, and his prankster personality made it hard to take dancing seriously, not that she truly did, but she did love it. He really liked Sasha, and she didn't think any less of him for being an omega... even when she was giving him shit for it.

 

Waking up, Eren couldn't understand why he was so hot. His eyes feeling gritty as he forced them open, finding Levi's face millimetres from his. Right. He'd had a stupid breakdown over everything. Coming off his pills, combing with the nausea of pregnancy had left a lot of his functions fluctuating. His fainting spell coming from dehydration and the fact his body was struggling with it all. That would explain it... Wriggling from Levi's hold, the alpha tried to cling to him, mumbling his name. Fuck... he couldn't remember the last time they'd woken up like this... probably since before Viren had gotten his feet under him. When he was a small pup, they'd spend hours laying in bed, watching him sleep and dreaming of their future. Shit. He'd missed this. Their bed. Levi's cuddles... he couldn't do this right now. Escaping the bed, he found Titan had even wandered in, sprawling across the bottom of the bed like he'd never given his position to in the first place. Flicking his tail, he pretty much confirmed Eren's thoughts. If he could talked he'd, no doubt, say how happy he was that it was just the three of them again. Wrapping his arms around his waist. Eren looked towards Viren's bedroom. He might have needed a break, but it felt so cruel to send Viren away. The boy hadn't done anything wrong. Not in loving Levi... and if he did grow to be an alpha, he was only giving Eren the respect he deserved as a fucked up omega.

Showering and dressing, he walked out to find Levi in the kitchen. His head was pounding like a bass drum. The last thing he wanted to do was pretend to be human, let alone a functioning one. Bed was soooo close. He could make... oh... nope, Levi was looking at him  
"Hey, you. How did you sleep?"  
"I could use another 20 years worth"  
Levi snorted, shaking his head. How the fuck did he manage to look so fucking good in the morning?  
"Come sit down and I'll make you breakfast. I thought we could go shopping today"  
"What happened to work?"  
"You're more important. How does shopping sound?"  
Like peopling... and being nice to people... and seeing people...   
"Can I have some painkillers? My head hurts"  
"You need water. You're still dehydrated"  
Walking over to the dining table, it was weird that Viren wasn't there. That he wasn't sitting on the kitchen counter talking to Levi, or stealing treats. Sitting down, he drew his right knee up, to rest his chin on it. Watching Levi bringing over a tall glass of milk, and two small white tablets. Placing them down, Eren guessed he should be happy that Levi wasn't checking him a for a fever  
"What do you want for breakfast?"  
"I'll make some cereal in a minute"  
"I'll make you cereal. Which one do you want? I think we have cocopops"  
"They're Viren's. I have cornflakes in the pantry"  
"Just because our son likes most of the same shit you do, doesn't mean you should go without"  
"It's fine. I don't feel hungry"  
"Were you sick again?"  
"No..."  
"Maybe you're getting better? Did you mention the bug yesterday?"  
Bug. He could live with the pup being called bug  
"Yeah. They just said to keep my fluids up"  
"I didn't see your appointment on the fridge"  
"It's on Friday the twenty-second at 4"  
"So Friday"  
Shit. He'd been sure it was next week  
"Yeah. Well, we need to be down in Paradis and I wanted to get it done before then"  
They'd offered to give him an ultrasound, but he didn't want one. Not with Hanji so close... he wanted to wait and see, as to whether he'd miscarry or not   
"Ok. I'll add it to the calendar, and see that I'm off"  
"I told you I can take myself"  
Downing the pills and gulping down the milk, he prayed they'd kick in soon. Pottering around the kitchen, Levi pulled out the container of cornflakes. He really suited his role as a dad. He might have gained some more wrinkles and there may now be more than a few grey hairs creeping in, but it really suited him. He was so good with Viren...  
"I thought we could go clothes shopping for you. It's getting cold again, and we are going on holiday"  
"I don't need clothes"  
His clothes were fine. They did the job. His anxieties decided to flare... the little voices arses as usual. Maybe this was Levi's way of telling him he needed to stop looking like a slob. It was so hard to have anything nice with kids in and out of the apartment. Something was always being spilt or there was vomit, or tears or... stuff. He binned his clothes when they got super holy... and there'd been a mass binning after Viren round a pair of scissors. Binning his yoga pants had nearly made him cry. Not that he had time for yoga... he'd have even less when the pup came... but Levi really didn't seem that keen on having another pup... Maybe he was starting to like him again because he was thin again... and he didn't dress in "girly" clothes anymore...? There was too much to think about. His brain hurt without the added pain of thoughts  
"Eren?"  
"What? Sorry"  
"I was saying you should let me buy you some new things"  
Eren pushed a smile to his lips, feeling it fall short. He didn't need Levi to buy things for him. He had money. He had more money than he knew what to do with. More money than he'd ever thought he'd have   
"Yeah. Maybe... it depends if I like anything"  
"You could probably get a few nice dresses or tops. Whatever you like. You always look good to me"  
It wasn't because he didn't look like a girl anymore? Did Levi want him to look more girl like? It seemed like so long since he'd bought his own clothes... and it wasn't like he didn't have nice clothes. He couldn't go Ballroom dancing in sneakers and a holy shirt... he just didn't want the kids ruining the few nice things he had. He'd had to hide the charm bracelet Levi had gifted him, along with the glass dolphin as Viren had tried to destroy them both  
"Ok"  
"Good"  
"When's Viren coming home?"  
Levi frowned at him, Eren feeling guiltier. He'd forced him to send his son away...  
"Whenever I call Hanji"  
"You should. He won't understand why you're not there"  
"He's healthy and he's safe..."  
"It feels cruel"  
"You need time to recharge"  
"You". Not "we". Levi was only doing this because he was so weak. Shit... 

Jumping up from his seat, Eren ran to the bathroom sink. Throwing up the milk and pills he'd just swallowed, a hand went to his stomach as he groaned. Placing a hand on Eren's back, Levi rubbed it softly, as he nuzzled into Eren's shoulder  
"You really should let me take..."  
"I've been to hospital. I don't need to go back. I had a piss and blood test. If it was something to worry over, I'd still be there"  
He sounded so fucking pissy. No wonder Levi rushed to soothing mode  
"Ok. Ok. I'm worried, that's all"  
"Stop it. I didn't ask for your help or worry!"  
Crap. He'd snapped at Levi. Shit. Coughing, it turned wet as he vomited again  
"Eren"  
"Fuck it. I'm not going to be able to eat breakfast. Let's just go do whatever you wanted to"  
"I wanted to take you shopping... for you"  
"I don't need anything. Save your money"  
For someone who actually deserved it  
"Eren. I want to start trying to fix things between us. I want to buy you things. I want to do things with you... I want to make this work. Last night, you were rejecting me. It hurt. It hurt to know I pushed you that far"  
"It's not just you to blame. I'm the one who's..."  
"I know what you're going to say, but you're not. You're not fucked in the head. Or crazy. You're exhausted and stressed. You're also my omega. I want to live up to the promises I made you. So stop thinking you're a basket case, and stupid, or whatever"  
"It's the same thing"  
"No, it's not. I know you're not crazy"  
"Because I didn't freak out on you yesterday"  
"And how often you freak out. You haven't had a panic attack that severe in a while"  
That Levi knew about... even when medicated, they'd still come, though milder. The ones off of his meds... yeah. He knew he was still a basket case. He couldn't have this pup. Not like this... he'd have to talk with his doctor about options... he didn't want to abort it, but he was a bad mum and a bad omega   
"Why don't you change into something warmer? I'll make you some toast for breakfast"  
"I told you I can't eat"  
"You need to. It's not healthy not to. Even if it's just a slice of toast, you need something in your stomach"  
He wasn't going to win... no matter what he did or said....  
"Fine. I'll go change"  
Levi kissed his shoulder. Eren instantly wanting to cave into the man's touch. He wanted Levi to love him like he used to. When he'd randomly kiss him, or hug him, or jump into the shower with him, or wrap his arms around him and cling like a child as he cooked... He missed laying in bed talking and snuggling. He missed having real adult conversations, and watching scary movies to make fun of them. God. He longed for it all... Feeling his emotions well, his omega snarkily reminded him that he could have all of that, if he wasn't such a sorry excuse for an omega. He hadn't missed the insults his omega would supply. He hadn't missed feeling this shitty. He hadn't missed his paranoia or depression. He definitely hadn't missed feeling like he was walking on eggshells around his own emotions. No. He hadn't missed any of that.

 

*  
Dragged shopping, Eren kept trying to put things back. While Levi kept putting things in the shopping trolley. He was trying not to let the fact he was pregnant influence his purchases. If Levi had wanted another pup from him, he wouldn't be using two condoms or avoiding the subject. That was the clear answer to their problem. Shorts it was. It was still warm enough to pull them off

He ended up with an insane amount of new clothes and shoes that he was sure he didn't need. They wouldn't stay nice and new for long. He couldn't help but pick up clothes for Viren. Levi brushed off his enquiries of where his new clothes were. His alpha was better at buying new clothes for himself than Eren had been since Viren's birth, and anything that Levi had wore to death, was magically replaced thanks to online shopping. Despite the fact it would probably never be used, Eren did manage to buy some new makeup colour pallets and foundation. He missed the days where he used to take such good and careful care of his skin, only his stretch marks and suicide scars got any attention these days. Levi had naturally perfect skin. The alpha never knew his pain, or the pain of a breakout. It was hard to accept acne when it was on your face, as acne had such an ugly stigma. His changing hormones had brought more pimples than he knew what to do with. No one chose acne, but they did choose to be a dick about it.

After clothes shopping, Levi forced him to have a manicure and pedicure, while the alpha took care of something. He didn't know what, only that Levi kissed him, then disappeared off to wherever he had in mind, leaving Eren to trail into the salon in a state of confusion. Was it wrong that he was kind of feeling a little better, up until Levi had left? He had Levi's undivided attention. His mate was listening to his words, and his son wasn't throwing a tantrum over Levi paying attention to him. He was so fucking selfish. His son was just a pup. He deserved all Levi's attention, and Levi deserved to be happy. Struggling with his anxieties, he barely made his wishes understood, clumsily pointing out a nice cheese-leaf design for his fingers. Coming back mid-pedicure, Levi was sans their shopping. Standing over the woman doing his nails, his mate crossed his arms, while Eren found himself staring. His stomach was rolling like there was no tomorrow, for the first time in a long time, he really wanted to scratch... he should be enjoying this. Levi wanted him to enjoy this. Fucking pregnancy meaning no sanity pills. Levi could have just said he was off to put the shopping in the car, maybe he was mad over how much they'd ended up buying? Eren had said no. He'd even tried to put things back because they were way too much... but Levi had pulled out his m card and paid for it all without giving him a chance to pay for himself. Lifting his feet out the water to dry them, the small beta woman asked what colour he wanted his toenails. Levi pulled a face like it was weird, so he left it to his alpha, as a small stab of revenge. Levi choosing a dark green that he hadn't even noticed. It was nice, but he wasn't sure he wanted green toes until she started painting them. Mentally sighing to himself, he'd have to remember to wear shoes, or risk upsetting Viren. But hey, at least it went with his silver fingernails and their dainty leaf design. 

Leaving the salon, Levi wrapped his arm around his waist. Eren's knees nearly going weak as his alpha's scent wrapped around him  
"Is there anything else we need to get? Or is it just food shopping, left?"  
"I need to get a suitcase. I don't have one, and I think Viren needs a new one. His is filled with toys"  
"He does know he can't take all his toys with him"  
"He's two, nearly, three. He doesn't understand that he is coming back"  
"You know, you're really good with him. I know things haven't been great, but you've always kept trying to do what was best for him. He's lucky to have you as a mum"  
"I wouldn't say that"  
"Eren"  
"It's true. I'm not much of a mum"  
"You are. You run the whole household. You keep us all in check. You cook. You clean. You pay the bills. You make the appointments. You know what needs to be done and you take care of it. I'm so proud of you, and I'm sorry I've been putting so much pressure on you"  
"I don't do much... I mean. I'm usually with the kids"  
"I don't have the patience to spend the day chasing after four kids. And for what it's worth, I'm sorry you can't dance right now. But... it's temporary right?"  
"If you're asking if I'm dying, I'm not"  
"That's not what I meant. I mean, you're ok. Or you're going to be ok with rest, right?"  
"Yes, Levi. I'll be fine. They just said u pushed myself too far while sick. When it passes, I should be able to go back to dancing"  
"I wish you'd told me"  
"Why?"  
"Because... you need more you time. I could have looked after Viren, or I could dropped you off, or picked you up"  
"Viren likes the bus... so does Anna"  
"Hanji said Anna wants to start dancing"  
"She wants to do ballet. She's very much the little princess"  
"What about Viren?"  
"He hates it. He doesn't mind the crèche, but they're really good with the kids there"  
"What activities do they do?"  
"I'm not allowed to tell. He said so"  
Levi rolled his eyes  
"He's 2"  
"And silly mummy isn't allowed to tell daddy anything. That's what he said"  
"Eren, you know you can tell him off. Smacking his bum for misbehaving isn't the same as putting him through what you went through"  
Eren nearly laughed. Levi thought he didn't disciplined Viren? Wow... he was even more useless than he thought   
"Yeah. Sure... anyway, Viren will want a red suitcase"  
"I said the wrong thing again, didn't I?"  
"No. I just don't want to talk about it"  
"We need to. He can't treat you without respect. I refuse to let it keep happening"  
"Levi, he's just a pup, and I'm not the only mum this has happened to"  
"It doesn't make it ok. You didn't... you didn't nearly die giving birth for things to be like this. And I didn't promise to marry you, for to be trapped in a life where you're suffering"  
This was all too heavy. Hitting far too close to home, and it all felt like too little too late  
"I proposed to you, remember"  
"And I promised to protect and love you. I love you, but somewhere along the line I started taking you for granted"  
Ouch. That. That one hurt. Knowing it, was different from hearing it out loud   
"I grew to expect you waiting at home with Viren. And didn't think about what that meant for you. About how hard it would be for you to be alone"  
But he wasn't alone. He had Viren. And Anna. And Hanji, and Marco, and Mina and Anka. He had Sasha and Connie. And the people at the dance studio. The only person he didn't have was Levi, because Levi was working hard to support them... and the only person who could ease any of his pain and loneliness was Levi. Even with Hanji, he found himself only speaking half truths, and only seeking comfort from her when his omega side left him feeling so pathetically weak that he'd take love from the first alpha who'd gift it upon him. He was a wreck, and didn't deserve the love Levi was showing him. He wanted to go home... No. wanted to go Hanji's. He wanted to go home if it meant his brain would stop all this shit, and it meant Levi would love him. But they had responsibilities. They had a son to consider and everything else came second to that.

"Eren? What are you thinking?"  
"I think I need to stay with Hanji a while longer"  
Levi's scent turned pained, his alpha pausing mid step while someone behind them complained at their sudden stop  
"If I say I want you at home, will you come home?"  
"Levi. I know you love me. But I'm a mess"  
"Look. I want to work this out. I already told my boss that I need to be home with you"  
Levi did what? That wasn't ok. He didn't need more people thinking he was a weak omega. He'd never met Levi's new boss, but they probably thought him a stupid omega   
"I didn't ask you to do that"  
"No. But that's only because you felt you couldn't"  
"If I'd wanted things to changed, I wouldn't have said something"  
"Things need to change"  
"And what? You're the only one working. They won't give me a job"  
"I know Marco and Hanji pay you for babysitting"  
"It's not the same. Besides, Marco and Jean are thinking of moving. They've been wanting to move closer to Jean's family for a while now, and Anna. She's like a daughter. Hanji won't let me not accept payment. She puts it my account, and sends it back to me if I return it. So I use it on Anna"  
"Hanji was thinking of putting Anna in daycare to get her used to socialising with more people"  
Eren held his tongue. Levi wasn't great at forcing a casual tone. Maybe to someone else, but not to him. No doubt Hanji and Levi had been talking about his fragile mental state and decided it was best he wasn't left with small children  
"It might be good for Viren too. He's got to be sick of playing with the girls all the time"  
And there it was. He was right   
"If you think it's for the best. I don't know. I didn't go to school"  
"Eren. It's not that I don't think you're a good mum"  
"Levi, everything you've said tells me that's exactly what you think. I do discipline Viren. I tell him I love him. I try to do everything I can to make him happy. And this... this was all ok. I was coping until my meds stopped. All this talking is just making me feel worse"  
"I just want to help"  
"You can't ok. You can't. This problem is inside me. I need to work on me and figure out how to fix me. Now. Let's just go home. Viren doesn't need us fighting"  
"We still need to go food shopping"  
"You should go with Viren. You don't get to come, but he loves it, and he'd love to go with you"  
"And what about you? That's cutting you out of the family again, and that's the kind of shit I'm trying to stop"  
Eren smiled a sad smile of defeat  
"If it makes him smile, then that's ok. He might not believe it, but if he's happy, than that's all that matters to me"  
"Why do you... how... fuck. This isn't what I fucking wanted. You're my mate. My love. My fiancée and my omega. I hate this"  
"I thought happy endings never meant having to be sad... but I love him, Levi. I love him more than I love life. His happiness is the only thing I could wish for. And besides, he loves you. Even if he doesn't want to admit he's anything like me, he's got good taste"  
"Do you... you know, still love me?"  
"With all my heart and soul"  
"Then how do I fix this?"  
"You stop blaming yourself. I go to the doctor on Friday and we go from there"  
"I don't think I can wait that long"  
"Well pushing the issue has only made us both upset. I can smell my own scent and it fucking stinks. I want to bring Viren home and take a bath"  
"Is that what you really want? Or is that what you think I want?"  
"It's what he wants. And I want what he wants, for him"  
Head butting his shoulder, Levi wrapped his arms around him  
"I don't fucking deserve you"  
"No. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you"  
"I don't know how we managed to make the most adorable shit in the world"  
Returning the hug felt like the right thing to do   
"I've taken some giant shits, and I promise you, it's nothing compared to giving birth"  
"Aren't you lucky we only have one. It'd be a shame if anything happened to that arse of yours"  
Eren hoped Levi didn't notice the way he tensed before forcing himself to relax and nod  
"Yeah... I guess if we're going to do this right, I won't be staying at Hanji's"  
"You can. If you need to"  
"Viren wouldn't be happy there. He really loves you"  
"God. I feel like an arsehole"  
"No. You're not. Blame the medication, I am"  
"I thought you were getting better, even without the pills"  
"You didn't sign up for this"  
"I'm your alpha. I didn't even feel it through our bond"  
Levi sniffled, Eren realising his neck was growing wet as his alpha cried... in the middle of the shopping centre. Levi wasn't an emotionally stunted robot but he also wasn't one to cry like this   
"I'm sorry. I think we should go home"  
"Yeah. We can shop online, if that's ok"  
"Yeah. I usually do. I think it's one of the handiest things you've ever taught me"  
"I'm glad I had some uses"  
"No. Levi. Please don't be like that. You're a wonderful father to Viren. You're a wonderful alpha to both of us"  
"But I let you down"  
"No. I let me down. Please don't cry. You want us to work this out, when I was thinking you wanted me to leave. I'm the one having the problems. Ok. Tonight, I'll cook you anything you want for dinner, if you just stop blaming yourself"  
"You're supposed to be resting, you've been sick"  
"I'll be ok. And I did rest. I just woke up feeling crap from being dehydrated"  
"I shouldn't have dragged you shopping. I'm so stupid"  
"Now you sound like me"  
"If you're feeling this shit all the time, I don't know how you get out of bed"  
"Because there's a little boy who needs us. The world doesn't stop because I feel like crap"  
"I'm still sorry"  
"Just give me some time. And no more tears"  
"Fuck. I feel like an idiot. Crying like this"  
"Well you did pick the wrong time to have this conversation"  
"In future, I'll listen to you"  
"I'll remember that"

 

*  
Friday came too soon for Eren. Levi forcing him to accept a lift to his appointment, thanks to him vomiting all morning. Left weakened, everything he ate seemed to come back up, so he living on vitamin shakes and pills. He had anti-nausea pills from the hospital, and while they helped, they only seemed to want to work when they wanted. Levi had wanted to come into his appointment with him, but that meant no one would be watching Viren as he didn't want his son to know there was anything wrong with him. The boy already seemed confused over Levi being home more, not that he was complaining. He was practically glued to his side, creeping into their bed, no matter how many times Levi moved him back to his own.

Explaining how he'd taken his test, and then had his pregnancy confirmed after he collapsed, to his doctor, the woman was worried about him. Getting on the scales only proved to show he'd lost more weight than he'd thought. The fact he was so sick, wasn't a great sign, nor was his mental health. Having already booked to confirm a pregnancy, he had his first ultrasound. Two small heartbeats were racing inside of him, which again, wasn't a great thing. Everything his body had was going to his pups... One pup was bad enough, but the idea of chasing after two. Levi wouldn't be happy.... bursting into tears, he word vomited out absolutely everything that had been happening. It was her who suggested abortion. He didn't want to abort... he didn't even know if he could do that... though he had seriously given it some thought. He wanted Viren to have siblings. He wanted a big family with Levi as the sire. But if it was going to turn him into a basket case, he didn't know if he could do it. Or do it to Levi. His doctor knew what Levi meant to him, and that he may not always make the best decisions. It wasn't her place to push, as she told him ultimately that it was his body and he had to what was right for him... giving him a small white box that seemed to weigh a ton. Abortion pills. She went ahead and called the hospital to make an ultrasound appointment for him, due to his distress, but he couldn't get in until after they'd come back from Paradis. She also adjusted the anti-nausea medication, and gave him a light sedative that she assured him would take the edge off without hurting the pups... provided he didn't abuse it. Half a pill before sleeping. It'd help give him a dreamless sleep, so he'd actually get some proper sleep. She also wanted him feeding his face. Even if he didn't eat full meals, he needed the calories. A story he'd heard too many times before. Leaving the doctor's office, he had a heavy heart. Two pups were inside him, leaving him with twice as much to lose. The pills in his pocket felt like a dirty secret... and something that he couldn't bare telling Levi about. They had their first real family holiday coming up, and he wanted to enjoy that. He wanted to watch Viren's face light up at the ocean, and build sand castles on the beach. He wanted to go swimming, or attempt to swim, and just pretended that things were all good. That they were a warm and happy family. A normal family. Letting Levi wrap his arm around him, his silvery-grey eyes were filled with hope as he stared into his. Shit. He wanted to cave on the spot and confess  
"What did she say?"  
"She gave me a prescription for different pills. I might still be a little off for a while. And I've lost too much weight, so there's that. I have to go back to grazing"  
"Oh, Eren..."  
Eren pushed his face up against Levi's neck. He wanted to nuzzle, but a small hand was already pushing against his leg  
"Don't. Ok. Everything is ok. Not in front of Viren"  
"Alright. But we're talking about this when we get home"  
"You smell different"  
Oh fuck. Right. His scent. He was growing sweeter and sweeter by the day. He'd already started to experience the horniness that pregnancy brought with it, but he was just too low to want to do anything about it... hopefully these pills would kick in and help... and once they had, maybe Levi would want to touch him, and maybe he'd want Levi too... Being together so long, they'd had sex more times than he could count, sex with Levi used to feel good. Secretly having sex and trying to muffle the noises each of them made had been fun... he missed that  
"It's probably from the stress and fatigue of my pills stopping. I'm definitely looking forward to Paradis Beach and sunbaking"  
"I don't know if I want you sunbaking. Right now, I feel like being a bad dad"  
"Down boy. I need to gain weight back first, and you know, fix the shit in my head"  
"Daddy!"  
Eren pressed a kiss to Levi's neck, before breaking away from his alpha. Viren already reaching up for Levi to lift him   
"Hold on baby, daddy is talking to mummy"  
"I want to go to the park"  
"Not today baby. Mummy's not feeling well"  
"You can drop me home. I'll be fine sleeping"  
"Eren, no trained medical professional is going to leave you alone when you look as if you're about to collapse on the spot. We'll swing by a pharmacy on the way home, then you're resting"  
"I don't n..."  
"This isn't up for negotiation"  
Ooook. If Levi hadn't been stubborn enough about the appointment, his stubbornness had increased ten fold over this. Even if he'd wanted to protest, he literally couldn't. Instead, he found himself nodding, though he wasn't happy about it.

 

Levi insisted on picking up his pills, but Viren started screaming the moment the alpha climbed out the car. Eren's aching head couldn't take it. He wanted to climb into the back and gather Viren up against him, even as he cried for daddy. Climbing out his side, Levi went to stop him  
"You need to rest"  
"My head hurts and he's crying. Can you please calm him down. My nerves..."  
He was shaking. He'd just closed the car door on his crying son. His omega was going crazy at him for it, which in turn was sending his instincts haywire   
"Please, Levi. I can't stand to see him cry"  
"He has to learn he can't always have things his own way"  
"We can't leave him in the car. Just give me the script back. I'll grab my meds and come back"  
"Fuck... no. We can't leave him in the car, ok. But. You're resting when we get home. I don't want you to do anything. You're only job is to eat, and sleep"  
"You know I can't sit still that long"  
"Then I'll have to ground you and send you for a time out"  
Time outs were bad kids. He was being a bad omega. Shit. Not this shit again. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he nodded  
"Ok. Ok..."

 

Despite the fact he was supposed to take the sedative at night, Eren forced it down with an anti-nausea pill before laying down on the sofa. Levi fetched a cool flannel, that he didn't even know he needed until it was laid across his head. His mate also grabbed a trail mix out the pantry, placing the bowl in front of him with a vitamin shake. The alpha then sitting on the edge of the sofa, his left hand cupping Eren's right cheek   
"I want you try and eat a little and drink this before falling asleep"  
"Ok. But what about Viren?"  
"He'll be fine"  
Honestly, Eren wished his son was laying along his side. Like how Eren laid beside him when he was sick. He really wanted to cuddle the pup, and fall asleep with him in his arms  
"Hey. What's with that face?"  
"It's nothing"  
"Eren, tell me"  
"I was just thinking I wish Viren would cuddle me"  
"You want cuddles?"  
He felt sooky and wanted to cling like there was no tomorrow, but they needed someone to watch Viren  
"It's ok. I'll eat and sleep"  
"Maybe when I put him down for his nap?"  
"It's ok. Titan will give me cuddles whenever he comes out of hiding"  
"Do you want me to find him?"  
"No. It's alright. God knows he's seen enough of me being sick or crying"  
"Does it happen a lot? You crying?"  
"I try not to in front of the kids... I'm sorry. I'm talking too much"  
"No. I want to hear this"  
"It's fine, Levi. Kids don't understand that they're not the cause of your tears. They take that on and they blame themselves. If you're the only one there when mummy cries than you have to be to blame. I won't do that to him"  
"You're such a strong omega"  
"I'm just a mum"  
"There's nothing just about you. You have a strength inside you, Eren. Even with everything we went through, what you went through. You've always done what you thought was right or what you thought you had to do to protect us all"  
"I'm only strong because you're my strength. Don't forget that"  
The pills were kicking in faster than he'd thought they would. His eyelids heavy as he fought to keep them open. Levi was being so incredibly soft, and now all he wanted was a hug from his alpha  
"If you're tired, sleep. I love you"  
"'m sorry"  
His words were slurred with exhaustion, as he lost his battle to keep his eyes open.

Sleeping right through the day, it was dark when Eren woke. Rubbing his tired eyes, he looked up in confusion. His head was in Levi's lap, his alpha's fingers playing with his hair he like used to  
"Hey, you. Look who's finally awake"  
"What time is it?"  
"A little after 2 in the morning. You were out like a light"  
"Mmmm. My doctor gave me some sedatives. I didn't think half a pill would work that well"  
"Do you feel up to eating?"  
"Not really, but I know you're going to make me"  
"I made pasta for dinner. It's chicken and broccoli. But if that's too heavy, I can make something else"  
"No... I can eat. Shouldn't you be in bed?"  
"I didn't want to disturb you. You looked like you were actually relaxed"  
"I feel a bit better... and really heavy"  
"Sedatives will do that. What's the dosage?"  
"Half a pill before I go to sleep, when I need them"  
"You didn't sleep very well last night"  
"I was nervous there was something really wrong... I didn't want to worry you"  
"Hey. It's my job to worry"  
Rolling towards Levi, Eren sighed   
"I do need to talk to you, but I can't yet. I'm not dying. So don't jump to conclusions"  
"You need to talk?"  
"Yeah. It's kind of important, but I'm scared you'll hate me"  
"Eren, I could never hate you"  
"You could. Everyone is capable of hate"  
"You're an idiot if you think I could hate you. You should know that"  
"My head's all screwed up"  
"Is that why you need time?"  
"Y-yeah... Levi... I'm scared"  
Placing his book down on the sofa chair, Levi pulled him up to sit in his lap. The alpha pushing his hair back from his face  
"I'm here, ok"  
"Even if it's bad?"  
"Yeah. We'll talk about this when you work things out"  
"And what if you hate me? What if you want me gone?"  
"That's not possible. You're letting you mind and omega run wild. I've called my boss, she understands"  
"I hate that you talk about me. I feel like everyone's laughing at me"  
"No ones laughing. She has an omega mate. She knows how hard it can be"  
Eren sniffled. Levi hadn't told him that before   
"Yeah. So don't worry. Ok. It's not like how it was with my old boss"  
"It still causes her inconveniences"  
"That we can work out. I'm too important to fire"  
"You've always been important. But what have I been? Nothing but a bad omega and a bad mum"  
"Have you been thinking about Zeke again?"  
"How could I not? We're going to scatter Grisha's ashes... and I haven't been to see him since I scattered his. I see him sometimes. He tells me how dirty and disgusting I am. And how he's ashamed"  
Levi pulled him tight, guiding his face to his neck as he rocked him  
"You're not bad. You're not dirty or disgusting"  
"I feel like I am! Like everything is falling apart!"  
"It's falling apart, but that's ok, because we're going to use a shit ton of glue, and sticky tape, and staples, and whatever else we need, to hold this together"

"Daddy?"  
Jerking away from Levi, Eren nearly fell as he tried to bolt. He couldn't have Viren seeing him crying. Sinking on to the coffee table, he was pretty sure he was sitting on the trail mix from earlier  
"Go to bed, Viren"  
"I had a bad dream"  
His son really was adorable. His words were really coming along, especially as he neared three  
"I need to go toilet"  
Levi sighed as he moved to push himself up   
"Daddy! I need to do poos!"

Eren failed at not cacking himself laughing. With his hands on hips, a pout on his face, and being the carbon copy of his father, he could never imagine standing in the living room screaming the same thing as their son did. Raising an eyebrow, Levi pushed himself up off the sofa, before dropping a kiss on Eren's head  
"Let me take care of this, then I'll get your dinner. Ok?"  
Nodding, Eren was still laughing. It felt like years since he'd laughed like that, and fuck did he need it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always. I do read all your comments, so suggested and hypothesise away! Xxxxx  
> Your support means the world to me


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry guys!! I didn't realise I hadn't posted this chapter yet!!
> 
> Anyway. Wherever you be, I hope you're having a happy holiday season!! You all deserves the very best and happiness... I love you all!

Packing for Paradis, Eren was the last one to pack. Levi's suitcase was sitting beside his bedroom door, Viren's already in the car to prevent small fingers trying to pack toys instead of clothes. Which just left him. His new metallic light blue suitcase was way too big. With Viren, they wouldn't be going clubbing or dancing, or anywhere that he needed his make up or beauty supplies... he just needed clothes and a few pairs of shoes... and his father's ashes, which had been squirrelled away in his wardrobe. The last they needed was for Viren to find them and sprinkle them across the apartment, or dumped half his grandfather down the toilet. It may have been three years, but Eren still couldn't work out the feelings he had for his father. It was mortifying when he'd realised he'd started to understand some of the man's actions, especially after vowing to never be like him. Grabbing the first stack of clothes, they looked tiny in his suitcase. He'd told Levi he didn't need one this big, but nooooo, the man knew better and now everything would be wrinkled. He'd left his new clothes out, washed then folded neatly on the end of his bed, as he wanted to show Levi he was actually wearing them. He wanted to look good on Levi's arm. 

Pausing between stacking clothes, he grabbed his meds up. His moves stalling as he picked up the abortion pills. He still hadn't told Levi. He'd been so close... then... How could he? His alpha had been trying so hard. If he was in his room, he left him alone. If he was eating, he made sure not to stare, though Eren could feel the effort that took on his behalf, so it made that particular attempt kind of worthless. If he was sitting on the sofa, he'd drop a kiss on his head with a gentle "love you". He'd thought things were getting better... until that day. Now... now, he wasn't sure if Levi was acting out of love or guilt. Sliding his pills in between two tops, he jumped ten foot when Levi's voice came out of nowhere. He wasn't acting suspicious at all, as he hastily stuffed the abortion pills into his clothes blindly and threw more on top  
"Everything ok?"  
Forcing a bright smile for Levi, Eren nodded as he looked up to him  
"Yeah. Just packing. Everything else ready?"  
"Yep"  
"You've got Viren's three blankets? And his teddy?"  
"His teddy?"  
Eren tried to sound normal... he really did, but it all came out sounding like a long sigh  
"It was on the dining table. It's his new favourite, and it's been going everywhere with him. Teddy had to take a bath, so now he needs to be packed"  
"I'll do it now. How about you? Do you have everything?"  
"Yeah. It's fine, I'll be ready by tomorrow"  
"Are you coming to bed soon?"  
"Sure... don't forget Viren's teddy"  
His sentence ended with a sniffle. He couldn't even look at Levi without feeling like his heart was breaking. 

It'd been a stupid long few days. He'd had to stop by the dance studio to let them know he wouldn't be in for the next few weeks. He'd also needed to catch up with Connie and Sasha, Viren hadn't been happy at all as it meant missing out on time with Levi, though Levi wasn't home anyway. He was feeling a little better, when Levi suddenly had to go out. His alpha didn't tell him where he was going, leaving him thinking it must be related to work. If it was a work emergency, then things couldn't be helped. He knew that better than anyone. It was middle of the night when Levi finally came back, the smell of another omega rolling off him like a poisonous cloud. Lifting Viren off his lap, Eren caught a strong whiff of slick that wasn't his, with the lingering touches of Levi's own arousal. He was used to the scent of omegas, betas and alphas on his mate, hell, when an omega was in hurt and confused, Levi was one the alpha in the world that you wanted helping. But what he wasn't used to was Levi coming home with slick on his pants, and a tent in them. It'd shattered him. He'd taken a full sedative that night and slept through a full day, instead of making his sleep dreamless, he'd been trapped in a never ending cycle of nightmares where Levi always left. Now each kiss his mate gave him left him cold. Levi was working so hard to fix this, but what if it was out of guilt? Or a self imposed sense of obligation? If his alpha had another omega... he'd be happy for him. No. He really wouldn't be... he didn't want to be replaced. He didn't want to share his mate. He didn't want to be... left behind again... so Levi couldn't know he knew. He washed his alpha's clothes after Levi's shower and slept his old room. He wanted him... He wanted Levi. But if he'd cheated on him, then maybe this was all an act?

 

Having not slept the previous night, thanks to his continual tossing and turning, then a bout of nausea that had him "sleeping" against the toilet. Eren's pregnancy was the only thing on his mind. His mind was running circles and his scent had gotten to the stage it couldn't be hidden anymore. 10 weeks along, he reeled of it. Connie had noticed, being a healthy male after all, but Eren had brushed it off with a lie, simply saying he'd sat next to a pregnant omega on the bus over. He wasn't sure if he believed him or not, but the topic had changed as soon as the food arrived and Viren started babbling about his fries, then screaming when Sasha stole one. It'd been nice to see them outside of the dance studio, and he'd found Connie was a hugger. Sasha was a kisser, he ended up with bright pink lipstick on his cheek and his clothes smelling of alpha. Which he'd washed when he'd come home, purely to get his own scent out of them. By the time Levi's car was loaded, Eren was asleep on his feet, finally breaking and taking a half dose of sedative so he could sleep during the drive... as much as he wanted to see and experience everything with Levi and Viren.

 

*  
Levi had booked the same hotel as their first visit, he'd even booked the same room with a rented toddler bed for Viren. Sure. They'd all be atop of each other, and it didn't leave space for anything romantic, but he wanted to recapture the feelings they'd felt for each other the first time they were there. 

Letting Eren sleep the trip away, Viren had napped off and on, before complaining he was hungry... then that he needed to go the toilet. It was all starting to get ridiculous. His son finally dissolving into the mother of all tantrums, while Eren slept through it all. Levi had thought of turning the long drive into a driving lesson for his omega, but that wasn't happening, especially if Eren had taken a sedative. His mate looked pained, even as he slept. He didn't know what had happened for things to turn out like this, or how many times he'd hurt Eren along the way... but the bright spark in his eyes had been starting to catch again, Eren even smiling from time to time, until a few days ago when his mate had slipped backwards again. 

Checking into the hotel, Levi went ahead with Viren. Leaving Eren sleeping in the car. His omega was too sleepy to be able to make it up the stairs on his own, and Viren had cried himself dry. Leaving the pup on their bed, along with Viren's and Eren suitcases, he headed back down to his car. Undoing Eren's seatbelt, his omega reached for him blindly, and Levi was too happy to lift him into his hold. Nuzzling his hair, he pressed kisses to Eren's sweaty temple  
"Br... Eren, we're here"  
Eren being his brat was so ingrained in him that it physically hurt not to call him that. He didn't realise that the name had spread to their son, or Anna. Not when Eren would forever be his Shitty Brat, and not when he knew that name had so much meaning between them. Nuzzling into his chest, Eren lets out a breathy sigh  
"Levi?"  
"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. But we're here"  
Eren struggled weakly in his hold   
"Shhh, it's ok. I'll carry you up to our room"  
"Where's Viren?"  
"Already asleep. He cried himself out"  
"What happened?"  
"Just a long drive. How do you feel?"  
"Sleepy"  
"Then let's get you up to our room. I could use a shower"  
Even with the air conditioning on, being in a black car with a leather interior left him dripping sweat. Beads rolling down his back revoltingly  
"I can walk"  
"No, I want to carry you. You've gotten so light"  
"'m sorry"  
Nuzzling back into him, Eren let himself be carried. His mate felt so tiny and warm against him. He was probably dehydrated from the drive. He'd have to get him into a cold shower, and fed. He'd found Eren in the bathroom vomiting again as he cried. He'd wanted to go to him, but Viren had wet the bed, and by the time he came back, Eren was sleeping against the toilet. He didn't want to wake him, not when he needed the rest. Kissing his mate's hair, he didn't want to let him go. He wanted Eren to talk to him, to tell him what had sent him spiralling again.

Laying Eren down beside Viren, Eren whined as he released him. Even if things were awkward, Eren was the most adorable omega he'd ever met. Nudging his hand for more attention, while too sleepy to know he was actually doing so. Levi couldn't resist. Toeing off his shoes, he peeled off his shirt and climbed up behind his omega, snaking an arm around his mate's thin waist. Nuzzling at Eren's bonding mark, he pressed open mouth kisses to the spot, stimulating it in the hopes that Eren would feel better. He didn't necessarily want him to feel horny, he just wanted him to feel something other than depressed. Whining softly, Eren found his hand, pulling it to his stomach with a small sigh. Adorable. Completely adorable. Fitting so perfectly in his hold. A nap wouldn't hurt, not when Viren and Eren were both safe and sleeping soundly in front of him.

Their nap was short lived by a hyperactive Viren. The boy crawling over Eren, to yell "wake up" in Levi's ear. The alpha growling at his son, as Viren's eyes went wide with fear. Fuck. He hadn't meant to snarl, but the rude awakening coupled with his instincts, had lead to scaring the crap out his son  
"Sorry. Daddy's sorry, baby. Here, get off mummy"  
"Mum smells bad"  
"And you don't smell much better Mister. I think you need a bath"  
"No!"  
Lifting Viren over Eren, he blew raspberries on his belly. His son screaming with laughter, as his small hands pushed against Levi's face, a stray finger catching him in the eye  
"And you need a nappy change. Let's leave mummy sleeping. Mummy needs his sleep"  
"Daddy"  
His son was a shit, but he loved him. The poor kid was too young to understand how much he hurt Eren when he pushed him away. He probably didn't understand what he felt when he watched Eren playing with Anna or Mina. His son didn't mean to be horrible, he was just venting the only way he knew how. 

Bathing Viren, the taking a shower himself, the pair were "playing". The objective to see who could be quite the longest, which Viren was losing with all his giggling. Eren probably wouldn't feel like heading down to the restaurant for dinner, so Levi was attempting to figure out what to order for room service. Viren sitting on his lap, where he was safely out of trouble. His suitcase of "friends" was still in the car with Levi's own, leaving him grabbing the first two things that weren't overly girly from Eren's suitcase... he wasn't built for shorts, but at least they were black. Releasing a long groan, the omega of his thoughts caught his attention. One hand going to Eren's stomach as another went to his mouth, his mate running into the bathroom, only for the sound of retching to reach them half a moment later. Lifting Viren off him, he kissed the top of Viren's head  
"I'm going to check on mummy"  
Viren was too interested in the bright photos of food in the hotel folder. His eyes widening at the sight of ice cream. Leaving Viren entertained, Levi headed into the bathroom, Eren holding his hair back as he spat, his mate had barely had anything to eat before leaving. Vomiting bile was never fun. Squatting down, he rubbed Eren's back  
"I'm here... just breathe"  
Eren spat again, before rasping  
"Fuck breathing. Let me die"  
His words stabbed at Levi's heart. Eren may have been joking, but it hurt to hear his mate wanted to die  
"Want me to find your tablets for you?"  
Shooting back, Eren would have fallen on his arse if Levi's hand hadn't been there  
"No!... I mean, no. I'll find them later"  
Was there some reason he wasn't supposed to take care of his mate?   
"I don't mind"  
"I'll get them... wait. Are you wearing my clothes? You've been in my suitcase?!"  
If that didn't scream Eren was hiding something, he didn't know what did   
"I needed a shower and my case is still down in the car"  
"I... ok. But you didn't move my meds?"  
"No. I didn't see them"  
"Ok... that's ok..."  
From the living area came the running of tiny feet, Viren face planting as his feet hit the tiles. Tripping at the final moment, Viren landed on Eren, Eren whimpering in fear from the sudden blow  
"Be careful baby, mummy doesn't feel well"  
"Daddy!"  
Wide grey eyes stared up at his, Viren's arms over Eren's shoulders  
"Hey, baby. Here. Come here. You need to be careful with mummy right now"  
"Dad. Food!"  
"You're hungry? Alright. I'll order room service"  
"Ugh. You guys can eat. I'm going to sit on the balcony"  
"Eren, you need to eat"  
"Right now, food is revolting. Even the idea of eating is making me want to vomit again"  
"You can't not eat"  
"Then I'll go for a walk and find crackers or something"  
"I think we have snacks in the car, but I really need you to eat something proper"  
"Well, I'm sorry I'm so useless I can't choke down food right now!"  
Kicking Eren in the back, Levi tore Viren away from Eren. Shocked to see his son hurting Eren like that. Couldn't the boy smell Eren was in pain. Right. No. He was three, or as good as... he probably couldn't figure out what smelts meant... unless he was like everyone else and couldn't smell Eren until they were right up next to him. Whimpering, Eren tried to curl away from the pain   
"Viren Farlan Ackerman. You don't ever. Ever. Hurt your mother like that again!"  
Smacking the boy's bum, Viren howled  
"Now tell your mother you're sorry and you love him"  
Hiccuping, Viren's eyes were wide as if betrayed   
"Viren. Apologise to your mother"  
He apologised to his feet, in front of Eren  
"'m sorry! M-mum"  
"Now give your mother a hug"  
Viren didn't move, Levi's voice a soft warning growl   
"Viren"  
Wrapping his arms around Eren, Eren pulled himself together  
"Thanks, baby. I feel better already"  
Kissing the boy's cheek, Viren squirmed away  
"You smell"  
Eren nodded, as if it was ok or normal to be insulted by their son  
"Yeah, baby. Mummy is sick, but he'll get better soon"  
"Viren, you can't say things like that to mummy"  
"It's ok Levi, I stink of vomit and sweat. I'm going to take a shower"  
"Do you want me..."  
"It's fine. I'll grab some clothes when I get out. Can you just watch him until I'm dressed? I can take him with me, or I can watch him while you eat"  
"Eren. You don't have to "take" him. He's our son. I'm pretty sure I can keep him under control long enough for you to have a shower, or a bath, if you want to"  
"A bath actually sounds really good"  
"Go ahead. I'll see if I can get them to bring something gentle on your stomach up. I know, but I'm worried about you"  
"I'm ok. I'll be better soon"  
"I hope so. I hate seeing you suffer like this. I love you, Eren"  
Eren half mumbled something under his breath, but Viren was crying louder than Eren was talking   
"Sorry, what was that?"  
"Can you please take him out of here? I don't want him to see my body"  
"There's nothing wrong with your body. You're perfect"  
"I'm gross. Anyway, I don't want to talk about it. Can you please just take him out the bathroom?"  
"I've got this. Let me know if you need anything"  
"I'll be fine. Just take care of him"

 

Levi's mind wasn't there during dinner, splitting a burger with his son as he stared at the bathroom door. Eren had found the bath salts by the seems of it. Traces of jasmine and some other florally crap had wafted in from the gap under the door. Hopefully his omega was enjoying the hot water, though Levi selfishly hoped it wasn't too much. He'd never noticed how much they'd given up as Viren got older. They no longer bathed or showered together... Hell. He couldn't remember the last time they had, outside of a quick fuck in the shower when Viren was sleeping in their bed, and that had only been the earlyish months of being parents after Eren's first disastrous heat. Where had the romance gone?

Eren was still in the bath when they finished dinner. Levi didn't want to disturb him, but he hadn't heard anything from the bathroom and the silence coming from the room may as well have been deafening. Leaving Viren "reading" the hotel menu again, Levi let himself into the bathroom. Eren was up to his nose in the water, his face slack as Levi went into panic mode over how still he was. Rushing to Eren, he shook his shoulder, earning himself a surprised screech. Water sopping over the side of the bath, as Eren slipped below the surface before reemerging and looking like a drowned rat. Wiping his face, his mate tried to recover  
"What the fuck?! Levi?"  
"Sorry. Sorry, I didn't meant to scare you"  
"No. You just tried to drown me. What the hell?"  
"You weren't moving, and I..."  
"You what? Thought I'd drowned myself?"  
"No. Yes. I know those sedatives are still in your system"  
"You could have tried knocking"  
Levi frowned, he shouldn't have to defend himself for being genuinely worried for his mate  
"I was worried"  
"And I was relaxing"  
"You've been in there a while..."  
"You told me to"  
"You didn't have to lay there so still"  
"I'm sorry my relaxing doesn't involve my flailing around like an idiot"  
"Eren"  
"No. Not cool. You scared the shit out of me"  
"Because I was worried!"  
"Then try knocking"  
"Are you seriously mad at me for being worried about you?"  
"Yes! When it involves me being scared"  
"I didn't mean to scare you"  
"How was I supposed to know that? One minute I'm soaking and relaxing, the next I'm drowning!"  
"Because I was worried! I am worried"  
"Stop it. I didn't ask you to worry about me"  
"What?"  
"You heard me. Just stop it"

Rising to his feet, Eren's thin form erupted in goosebumps  
"What are you doing?"  
"You wanted me out the bath"  
"I didn't say that"  
"No. You wouldn't"  
Stepping over the side, Eren snatched up the towel off the counter   
"Eren, please"  
"Please what? You just scared me, and like you said, I've been in here too long"  
"That's not what I meant"  
"Well I'm out now"  
Wrapping the fluffy bath towel around him, Eren leaned down to pull the chain connected to the plug  
"You didn't need to do that"  
"It's too late now"  
A kind of cold shiver ran down Levi's spine, as if Eren wasn't talking about the bath at all. Stepping past him, Levi caught Eren's arm, forcing the omega to turn back to him. His eyes searching for something. Anything. Deflating, Eren shook his head  
"Sorry. You just scared me. I didn't mean to snap, I'll get dressed then you can grab your suitcase from the car"  
"Fuck the suitcase. I want to know what's going on with you"  
"Nothing is going on with me. I'm going to get dressed. It's cold"  
It wasn't that cold. The bath water hadn't even been that cold for the time he'd been in there. If anything, Eren should have been hot. Forcing himself to release Eren's arm, his fiancée walked from the bathroom, leaving Levi trailing after him feeling completely thrown off. That whole moment wasn't how it was supposed to play out... but it didn't deserve such aggression on Eren's behalf.

Sorting through his suitcase, Eren pulled out a pair of jeans and nice shirt, Levi raising an eyebrow   
"Going somewhere?"  
"To get food"  
"I ordered you some steamed rice, with vegetables and fish..."  
"Then I guess I'm not"  
"Will you just calm down for a moment"  
"I am calm"  
"Eren. Stop. Take a breath for me"  
"I'm fine, Levi"

Yeah, right. Eren was definitely not fine. Eren picked a little at his dinner, eating more rice than anything else, before surrendering his food to Viren and announcing he was going for a walk, and not to wait up. At least he'd eaten first. He didn't miss the way Eren left his phone but grabbed his wallet. If his mate had wanted to go for a drink, he would have gone with him... wait. No. That would have left Viren alone... he really hadn't thought out that side of things...

When an hour passed to two, and Viren was sleeping, Levi couldn't wait any longer... locking the door and making sure there was nothing for Viren to get into, Levi headed out. Being such a tourist town, there plenty of bars still open. Their bright lights twinkled mockingly as Levi walked along the mall. Heading to the place with loudest music, he didn't know why he was so sure Eren would be in there. His scent wasn't even in the air as he entered, but something, possibly their bond, told him he was in the right place. Making his way through the crowd of people, he wrinkled his nose as he was assaulted by the stink of horny alphas, and the general stink of sweaty bodies. He felt gross by the time he finally reached the bar. His heart skipping a beat when he set eyes on his mate. Eren was sitting at the furtherest end of the bar, absentmindedly stirring the drink in front of him. It wasn't his usual bourbon, the contents too light. Maybe vodka? Or gin? He didn't know if Eren drank gin... but it stood to reason that the drink may not even be alcoholic if it wasn't bourbon. Starting towards his mate, another man reached him first. Two glasses in his hands as he came to sit by Eren. First his mate looked pissed, then a smile formed on his lips. Why couldn't Eren smile like that for him? Why did it feel like his heart was shattering into a million pieces with a single glimpse of it? His alpha roared at him, while Levi's stomach dropped. They'd... he thought they were getting better. Now some other man was making his mate smile. Blindly, he fled. Tears in eyes as he shoved his way out the bar, barely making it onto the beach before vomiting violently. That was that. Eren had moved on... He'd abandoned Eren, now Eren was abandoning him. His mate. His mate didn't love him anymore. Eren had never wanted to fix things. He wanted to leave. Despite what he'd said, Levi couldn't... He hadn't said anything when Eren smelt like other alphas, because he believed his mate wouldn't let anyone touch him. He'd believed Eren needed him and him alone. Why hadn't he noticed all the signs? Eren pushing him away. Eren being secretive. Eren... Letting out a mournful howl, his body shivered, despite the balmy night. He should have been the one to... To what? He'd forced himself on his mate. Eren had said as much. When did the alphas he so despised, the alphas that abandon their mate with their pup, become who he was? Stumbling back onto the veranda, he pressed his back to the cold, coarse brickwork with a groan. What was Eren doing right now? Was he making plans to go home with that stranger? Or back to his hotel room? 

Keeping the same position, he didn't know how long passed before Eren emerged alone. The omega walking casually back towards the hotel with his hands in his pockets, the mystery man completely absent from his side. Eren hadn't cheated on him? Or had he just let it happen in the bar? Had he spread his legs in such a dirty place? He was only one allowed to touch Eren there... worry gnawed a his gut as if he'd been impaled on the horn of a bull, but somewhere in his reeling mind, he realised Eren was about to walk into their hotel room, to find their son sleeping alone and him gone. He had to move.

Pausing to wait until Eren disappeared up the hotel stairs, Levi took a breath and tried to ignore his own scent as he crossed through the lobby. A lie already on the tip of his tongue. Entering their room, Eren was fussing over Viren, retrieving the boy's fallen bear from the floor  
"Hey"  
Shit. The lump in his throat, and thick, clumsy tongue left his voice low and gruff  
"Hey. You left Viren sleeping?"  
"Yeah. I couldn't find his bear. I thought it must have been in the car, but I guess he was laying on it"  
Eren nodded, accepting his lie all too easily   
"I'm sorry about before. My nerves were just... I shouldn't have snapped at you for being worried"  
"It's fine"  
Thanks to Eren, he loathed those words. They usually meant the exact same opposite  
"How do you feel now?"  
"Alright. I just needed a breather. I'm sorry, but I think I'm going to head to bed... even if I wasted the first day of our holiday"  
"It's... go ahead. You're still recovering"  
"Are you coming to bed?"  
"I'm going to take another shower. It's so hot out there, I'm already sweaty again"  
"It is kind of hot..."  
"Yeah. Go ahead and go to bed. I was thinking we could hit up the beach tomorrow?"  
"Great minds. I really want to see how Viren likes the water. His sunscreen is in my things, so after his bath, we'll go ahead and make sure he's covered before he gets dressed"  
"Sounds like a plan"  
He had no enthusiasm in his voice at all. The best he could offer was a pained smile. Fuck. He wanted to rush to Eren and hold him tight. He wanted to beg him not to leave and to choose him... but that wasn't fair on Eren. If his happiness wasn't with him, it was better he let him go and let him find his new happiness.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo I don't know if ya'all have noticed all the stuff from my other fics I've been throwing in this one and DOTW... this has another one...
> 
> Also. Don't hate too much on Viren. He's a small pup who doesn't understand why dad is never home, and why mum is always the one to discipline him. He has however learnt if he's mean to his mum, he gets more attention. Especially when he has to share Eren it's Mina, Anna, and Anka. He's jealous and doesn't understand that he is... he's soon to be 3 after all. He loves Eren. He's just frustrated by everything he doesn't understand... that and he was a demon spawn of child, still coming out of his terrible twos and sadly, it's gonna continue into terrible threes

It was like the previous night hadn't happened. Setting up near the water's edge, Eren looked amazing. Dressed in a loose white shirt and short white shorts, his long brown legs contrasted perfectly, as he caught the eye of everyone on the beach. Kicking back under the beach umbrella they'd rented, Eren was fussing over Viren as the boy tried to say no his floaties. It wasn't happening. No way was Levi risking his son's healthy and safety with that much water right in front of them. Pulling out his phone, Eren snapped photos of Viren, while Viren tried to escape to the water. Kissing the boy, Eren somehow seemed to get the photo he wanted, before looking up to him  
"Viren's ready for a swim, daddy. You should be the one to take him in. I can't swim"  
"You'll be fine. We're only going to the water's edge"  
"I don't feel that great. I think the rice from last night didn't agree with me. My stomach's been gross all morning"  
He'd probably thrown up so much that his muscles didn't know how relax  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yeah. I really want to get some good photos of you with Viren. He's so excited to be here"  
"If you want to go back to the hotel room, that's ok"  
"No. Family holiday remember. Besides, my two best boys make for the best targets"  
The smile that Eren gave him, seemed genuine enough. But the jealous stain on his heart, from the previous night, still left his blood cold. Distracting himself, he scooped Viren up   
"You're just going to take photos? Or record?"  
"Recording? Definitely recording. You two look so good together"  
"Ready?"  
"I'm more than ready"

Viren cried the first time the cold water ran over his feet. His little legs marching up and down on the spot as he reached up Levi's hold. Eren was laughing as he watched. Slowly the pup seemed to realise that the water wasn't some big scary monster in the closet. Falling in his bum, he splashed his legs. The joy was obvious. This was what he thought being a family would be like. Him. Viren. Eren. All of them a team and force of their own. Abandoning his phone, Eren came to sit on Viren's other side while Levi helping Viren build sand piles, only for the waves to continually wash them away. The boy too curious about it all, to be mad at the fact his work was being wasted. Settling himself down, Eren's hand landing on their son's head as he adjusted his hat  
"He seems to love it"  
"He really does"  
"I got heaps of you two together. I want him to have these memories"  
"So do I. How do you feel?"  
"I'm ok... my stomach doesn't know what to do when I'm not throwing up"  
"Does it hurt?"  
"A little. But this is nice"  
"We should head back up to the hotel soon"  
"We only just got here"  
"It's getting hotter faster than I thought it would. Today would be better inside. We can look up tourist things"  
Eren hummed, looking up to the bright clear blue sky  
"Mmmm. The sun feels nice, but he's got such delicate skin like you do. You're already starting to burn"  
"And you're not?"  
"Nope. Because I put sunscreen on"  
"So did I"  
"Mine must be better than yours. Viren, baby. It's time to get out of the water"  
Trying to lift Viren, Eren groaned, releasing the boy as hand moved to his stomach   
"Eren?"  
"It's ok. My stomach's still sore... maybe today would be better if we found something else to do?"  
"There should be a museum or something around. If we can't find anything, we can always take a drive"  
"I thought you'd be sick of driving after yesterday"  
"It's all about making memories, isn't it?"  
Eren looked confused for a moment, before cringing, then smiling softly   
"Yeah. Do you want to convince him to get out of the water?"  
"I've got it. Will you be alright packing up?"  
"Yes, mum. I can handle packing up. Hey, there's a great bar around here, I found it last night. They're supposed to do lunch. We could there, I mean... if you want to?"  
Levi's breath caught momentarily. Eren was bringing up the bar. The alpha wasn't sure if it was the sun, or the deep shame he felt at mentally accusing Eren of cheating, that burnt at his cheeks... no. It had to be the sun. Alphas didn't blush!  
"Sounds good. Did you have a good time last night?"  
"I ordered a lemonade. Just because we're on holiday, doesn't mean that I'm off mum duty"  
"I never said it did. Let's head back up"  
Leaning over Viren, Eren pressed a sweet kiss to his lips   
"I love you. Just. Don't forget that"  
"I know"  
"Good. Let's get this one up and into a bath. Then it's food time"

 

*  
Some how their trip to the beach had ended up taking up two hours. No wonder he'd started to burn. Heading into the bathroom with Viren, the boy didn't like the fact they weren't down at the beach anymore... and for a kid who's feet had barely touched the sand, he sure had a lot of sand over him... and in his mouth. He hadn't even seen the boy eating it. Cleaning the pup down, he carried Viren out to the living area so Eren could get him dressed. His omega busy rifling through his suitcase  
"Viren needs clothes"  
Dropping whatever was in his hands, back into his suitcase, Eren snapped it shut. Levi was getting real tired of Eren hiding whatever it was that he was  
"He looks like he needs a nap too. You don't mind waiting a little longer for lunch, do you?"  
"No... you really want to go back to that bar, hey?"  
"Yeah. It was... it was nice. And they were super friendly"  
"Oh, yeah?"  
"Yep. I think I might head back there tonight, if you don't mind"  
Levi's stomach did that annoying thing where it decided to drop again. Mental images flashing of Eren laughing with that stranger. And then. It was like the last two hours had never happened   
"Levi? Everything ok?"  
"What?"  
"You look like you have something to say"  
"It can wait"  
"Ok. Well. I have some things I want to talk to you about. I did some thinking last night, and I think I need to tell you"  
Eren did some thinking? This was it. His heart was racing. His mate was about to dump him. To dissolve the bond between them, and return the two rings that sat on his perfect finger... the two rings that were still waiting for a third to join them  
"Levi?"  
"Sure. Whatever. We'll talk. Viren needs clothes"  
Practically dumping their son on the bed, the boy jumped straight off, falling face first as he did.

"Viren!"  
Screaming his name, Eren rushed to the boy  
"Levi! What the hell was that?!"  
"I didn't mean for him to fall"  
Lifting Viren off the floor, Eren nuzzled into the boy's hair as he hushed him  
"I don't know what your problem is, but go take a shower"  
"I didn't mean..."  
"Go shower. It's ok, baby. It's ok. You're ok"  
Rocking Viren was a bounce in his step, Eren shot daggers in his direction   
"Levi, go cool down. I can smell your anger"  
"I'm not angry"  
"Don't lie to me"  
"I'm not"  
"Is it the bar? We don't have to go. I just thought it would be a nice place to have lunch with you"  
His confusion and fear over having been the cause of his son's fear stripped away the filter on his mouth  
"Is it me you want to have lunch with? Or that man you were with last night?"  
Eren blinked at him, a confused and hurt expression clouding his face. He practically hissed in Levi's face   
"What?! What are you talking about?!"  
This was definitely not the time to be having this conversation. And now Eren was lying to him  
"Don't worry. I'm going for a shower"

Stupid. Fucking. Shitty. Idiot. Scrubbing himself aggressively. He stayed under the cold spray until his scent was completely washed away. He'd just admitted to Eren that he'd stalked him again. That he didn't trust him. Forgetting to take clothes with him, he walked out wearing a towel. Eren was sitting on the end of their bed, the omega wiping at the tears rolling down his face while Viren was laying on his own bed, their son probably exhausted from all the fun and excitement the morning had brought   
"Eren... what's wrong?"  
"I worked it out. You weren't down at the car were you? You fucking followed me. I can't believe you"  
"You can't believe me?! I'm not the one who was letting a stranger buy me drinks! Is that why you want to go back? To see him again?!"  
"What? No. That was some random"  
"He brought you a drink and you fucking started acting like an idiot!"  
"His mate brought me a drink! When I sat down, he mistakingly thought I was interested in him and tried to tell me he was bonded. It was the only free seat at the bar at the time. I set him straight, and he went back to his mate. The drink was from her as a joke. God! Do you seriously think I would stoop to your level?!"  
"What's that supposed to mean?!"  
"You're the one who cheated Levi! I know it! I smelt omega and slick all over your pants and your arousal! I've been trying so hard to find a way back to you, but you don't even care"  
"I never fucking cheated on you!"  
"You're lying! Admit it! Admit it, Levi! You don't want me anymore! I'm useless!"  
"Don't you dare start with this fucking shit! I'm trying my hardest to do everything for you!"  
"You cheated on me! I smelt it!"  
"I never fucking cheated on you. My bosses mate went into heat and collapsed at work. She called me, because she needed help and needed an alpha she could trust. The whole time, I was thinking about how that could be you"  
"So you cuddled up with an omega in heat, thinking of me?! Is that supposed to make me feel better? I smelt your arousal!"  
"I wasn't aroused!"  
"Their slick was on your pants!"  
Eren's sobs grew harder  
"I knew it! I knew you didn't want me anymore!"  
"You're the one who doesn't want me!"  
"I've never wanted anyone or loved anyone more than you! You're everything to me! Everything Levi! You don't trust me! You... I never cheated on you. I never even had the thought to! You're the one who replaced me"  
"I never cheated either. I don't want anyone else! Why don't you get it!?"  
"Because I don't belong in this family! Not anymore!"  
"Yes you do! God. I can't live without you! I followed you last night because I was worried. It's not because I don't trust you, it's everyone else I don't trust! I don't want you hurt! I don't want you scared! I want you by my side forever!"  
"Then why aren't we married?! I thought we'd be married by now! I was so excited. I even started planning it. I even stupid changed my name to Eren Ackerman-Yeager on everything I could, because I was serious when I proposed to you! You're everything I ever wanted..."  
"Shit. Fuck. How the fuck did we end up like this? How did I hurt you so badly that you think and accept I would cheat on you?! Where did we go wrong?"

Blinking through his tears, Eren started rummaging through his suitcase. His mate stopping once he'd found whatever it was he was looking for. Angered at his omega was disregarding such an important conversation, Levi snatched the box from his hands. His eyes widening as he read the name, his alpha barely contained   
"What the fuck is this?!"  
"What do they look like?"  
Despite the drop in volume, Eren's voice carried all the anger it had before. Miserably, Eren resumed wiping at his face   
"Eren?"  
A pup. Another child... His alpha was over the mood at the idea of another pup... and bit by bit the pieces came together for him. The way Eren said his pills stopped. He'd had to stop taking them, but couldn't tell him because he'd pushed him so far away he seriously believed Levi had cheated. The confusion Eren must have felt believing he was now his second choice. The struggles with Viren and getting the boy to show him love, even when Eren presented him with everything but the moon on a silver platter. Eren's tone became filled with resignation and despair, the kind a parent uses when disappointed in you, and you wish they'd hit you instead   
"You want to know what's wrong? Fine. I'm fucking pregnant. Ok. I'm not sick. I don't have a stomach bug or food poisoning. I have a baby growing inside me that you don't even want. You're always using two fucking condoms, but you didn't the night of Mike and Erwin's wedding, and you never bother sticking around once your knots deflated. So I wasn't planning on telling you. Now just back the fuck off. We already have one kid that doesn't fucking want me around"

Shoving past him, Levi was too shocked to think. Pregnant. He. What. Another pup? Why didn't Eren tell him? How far along was he? And... abortion pills? Eren seriously thought he didn't love him? Or love him enough to want another child? He used two condoms because Eren had said he was scared of falling pregnant again. That and he didn't want to come way too fast, given their sex life was interrupted by parenting and responsible adulting... and Eren's arse was incredible  
"Eren? What? When did you find out?"  
"A few weeks ago"  
Weeks. He'd been stuck like this for weeks. Stuck thinking Levi didn't want another kid with him. Who knew how depressed and empty that had made him feel  
"And you didn't tell me?"  
"I. I've been trying to figure out us! I was going to hide it, but after the beach and last night... I needed to tell you. It's not... ok. I'm not ok"  
"You said you needed to talk..."  
"Yeah... well. Surprise. I'm pregnant and my body isn't coping... fuck..."  
The word came out like a grunted groan of pain. He didn't even have time to question it 

"Daddy? Mummy?"

Turning from the box of pills, Levi looked to a newly woken Viren as there was a solid a whimper behind him. Turning completely, his eyes widened. Eren's wet white shorts were fast turning red as blood ran down his thighs, his left fingertips covered in it, with clear traces of finger marks across Eren's legs where he'd wiped   
"Eren..."  
"Levi... I don't feel good"  
As his mate's eyes rolled back, Levi dropped the pill box, barely catching Eren by the arm as he crumpled. Across the room, Viren started screaming in fear. Eren had said his body wasn't coping. He'd been put on pills to combat his nausea, but his mate's body must have been giving everything it could to their child. He'd been given sedatives because the weight on his shoulders was just too heavy. His body too weak to dance anymore. In the space of the last month, Eren felt like he'd lost everything. Then there was the fact Eren was coming off his tablets. His system would be completely out of whack. He needed help. Laying Eren down in the recovery position, he stripped his towel off and shoved it between his legs. Jogging across the room, he snatched his phone up, a stuttering mess as he called through to emergency services for an ambulance. Leaving the call connected, he then found up the first pair of pants he could. He desperately wanted to comfort Viren, but he needed to check Eren's vitals. With the combination of Eren's pants already being wet, slick and blood, he couldn't gauge the bleed... but it was entirely possible, and more than likely, that Eren was losing the pup. Kneeling down, he placed his palm of Eren's forehead as he double checked his mate still had a pulse. Whining for him, Eren curled around himself though out of it  
"Brat. Come on, open those bright eyes for me. Come on, baby. I need you to look at me"  
"Mummy!"  
Fuck. The pills... had Eren already? He'd told Viren he'd be better soon?

Scrambling across the floor, Levi pulled the blister tray from the box. Both pills still inside. He hadn't... he'd wanted to... but he hadn't. Eren had wanted to tell him. He was getting the box to tell him. He'd let his anger get the better of him. Shit. Shit. Shit. He knew Eren was in a fragile state of mind... he shouldn't have pushed. He shouldn't have blown things out of proportion. He should have listened to his mate. Eren very well may have told him about the drinks thing when they went to the bar... but if he hadn't pushed, he wouldn't haven't have known that Eren thought he cheated on him. He wouldn't haven't known the pain his mate felt. Jealousy and pain carving themselves soul deep as Eren tried not to be abandoned by him... Maybe... He didn't like seeing Eren suffer, but without the medication coursing through his system, his omega had opened up to him again... his yoyoing emotions making it impossible for Eren to calmly sit down and explain things, because he simply wasn't able to right now. He hadn't wanted to be angry. He hadn't wanted to fight. He was just struggling to figure out how to make Levi and Viren happy, like he always did, leaving him with the weight of the world on his fragile shoulders  
"Mummy... mum!"  
Viren pulled him back to reality. Ok. Ok. He needed to approach this the way he was trained, and not like the untrained ape he was currently doing the world's greatest impression of. First. Unlock the door. Eren was in the recovery position. His airways were clear, and he had a pulse. His heart was racing, but he was still breathing. Second. Viren. Viren was just a child. He didn't understand. He saw the blood and knew mummy was hurt... Shit. In the few moments it'd taken him to open the door, his son had made it to Eren's side. Pulling him back, he held him to his chest. Making sure the boy was facing away from Eren. He couldn't stop a miscarriage, he didn't have anything to do anything about it with. He didn't even have his first aid kit... Viren. He had to protect his son from seeing his mother like this. Eren would never forgive him if he did. Kissing the pup's hair, he cursed the ambulance for taking so fucking long. He knew something was wrong. He knew it. He should have made Eren go to hospital. He should have been there when he collapsed. Hanji had said Eren asked for him. Had he wanted to tell him then? His mate would have been terrified. He should have dragged him there by the hair if he'd had to, when Eren didn't start improving. Did Hanji know? She'd gone with him... Why hadn't she said anything? She was able to get more out of Eren than he was these days and holy fuck... his omega's pain was ebbing through their bond. Levi seriously felt like was about to shit himself with the pressure and cramps that seemed to be forming in his gut.

Finally the sound of sirens reached his ears. Viren was still crying hysterically in his arms. It was another 10 minutes before help finally arrived. As the two EMT's entered the room, Levi explained the situation to them. His alpha leaving everything he was saying curt to and the point. He wanted to snap the arm of the first woman who placed her hand on Eren's shoulder. No one should be handling his mate, except for him. No one. Within minutes, Eren was on the gurney, Levi needing to ride along as he had no idea where Paradis's hospital was. He barely thought to grab his phone and Eren's wallet off the bedside table. His own buried somewhere in the things still packed from the beach. His feet felt like lead, his head swimming as he followed Eren out, people having gathered to witness what the fuck was going on. Eren would have loathed all the attention directed his way. His heart so precious, he would have hated even the thought of causing inconvenience.

 

Eren didn't stir during the hospital ride, Viren cocooned in Levi's lap crying softly, as he watched every single move the EMT made. Mike and Erwin wed on the 21st of August, so that was the rough date of conception, 11 weeks ago... 11 weeks... Just shy of 12. It was like Eren's first pregnancy all over again. He'd missed the start, even though he was right beside him.

 

Arriving at the hospital, Eren was whisked away from him. Levi feeling a little lost until an attending nurse came over to him to collect Eren's medical history. He didn't even know the name of the pills his mate had been taking... giving her the name of Eren's doctor, she promised to check, giving him a sympathetic smile as she did. Evicted out to the waiting room, his mind was still a muddled mess of self loathing... but there were things to do. Pulling his phone out, he called Hanji. The woman taking a frustratingly long time to answer, sounding as if she'd just woken. Launching straight into explanation, his voice trembled. He'd lost a pup he hadn't even known about... and his alpha was mourning that loss as of the poor little thing as if it had been birthed. Eren was going to be distraught. He didn't deserve this or the weeks of suffering it'd brought him. How could his omega think that he wouldn't be excited?! He loved Viren and he loved Eren. It may not have been planned, but the idea of expanding their family filled him with pride. He was at the stage where he could tolerate moving to the suburbs. A house with space to move, a backyard for the kids to play in... though, he didn't think he could part with the apartment. He'd kept it because it was a home with Eren. Every time his omega wandered off, he always knew Levi was waiting there for him. Lost his own thoughts, he forgot he was on the phone to Hanji. Hanji repeating his name over and over until he grunted in acknowledgement, then promising to head down to help out with Viren. Eren probably wouldn't be feeling very holidayee, and incredibly tender, both emotionally and physically, over the next few days, possibly the next fortnight until the miscarriage had passed.

 

 

*  
Waking up confused, Eren whined softly. His head felt like it was filled with cotton wool, and he couldn't quite remember how he'd gotten to wherever he was, only that the was clearly no longer in the hotel with Levi. Whining again, Levi appeared at his side. His alpha's large, cool palm felt wonderful against his head  
"Hey, Eren. How do you feel?"  
"Thick... I can't think"  
Nuzzling into Levi's touch, his alpha sank down on the edge of his bed  
"Do you remember what happened? We were fighting in the hotel?"  
Eren blinked at Levi, right... he was going to tell Levi was he pregnant... then... The pups... he'd started bleeding. His confused green eyes filled with sorry  
"Shhh... shhh. It's ok"  
"I'm sorry... I..."  
"You wanted to tell me. I know. I didn't figure out until after I yelled at you. I'm so sorry, Eren. I'm so sorry I yelled"  
"'s ok..."  
"No it's not. Eren, I promise, I never cheated on you. And I know you didn't cheat on me, right?"  
He was too tired for this  
"Lee... no... I can't think"  
"Sorry, br-Eren. I had to tell you"  
"Am I dying?"  
"No. No, you're not..."  
"Viren's presents are in the top of my wardrobe... and yours..."  
"Eren, shhh. You're going to just fine"  
"But the..."  
"We're still waiting for the results. They only just let me back in to see you"  
"Viren?"  
"He's sleeping next to you"  
Eren couldn't find the strength to look down, even moving his arm was hard as hell. He was so warm and tired... other than his head, he couldn't feel the rest of him. It was nice to be pain free. Taking his hand, Levi placed it on Viren's soft hair  
"He's been crying for you"  
"He shouldn't be here"  
"Hanji is coming down to take care of him. It's fine... ok. It's all organised"  
"I'm sorry"  
"No. This isn't your fault. Ok?"  
"Did I... did..."  
He was so fucking confused... and really sleepy. Whining softly, he didn't know what he wanted to say  
"You're ok. Just rest"  
"Lee... stay?"  
"You want me to stay? I'm not going anywhere"  
"Hold me?"  
That's what he wanted. He wanted to be in Levi's arms. His omega was stuffed right back under all that cotton wool, but they both wanted Levi to take whatever was happening away  
"Ok. I need to move Viren. You've got two IV lines running into the cannula in your left arm. They had to give you a blood transfusion, because you're so weak"  
"'m sorry"  
Leaning in, Levi kissed him. Eren was sure, if he could be sure, that his mouth was taste revolting. He was too tired to think about it. Nuzzling into his forehead, Levi sighed softly  
"I love you so much. I never, ever meant to hurt you. You're my everything. I'm completely and totally Erensexual for you, my Shitty Brat"  
"Lee, shut up and cuddle me"  
"I can do that"

Curled into Levi's side, Viren slept across the both of them. Falling asleep, he felt much more clearer when he woke next. His body still heavy, but his mind no longer fluffy. He was sleepy, and edging on an emotional breakdown, but being so close to his mate felt soooo good. Levi was warm and anchoring. The only thing he could really focus on. He loved this alpha more than life, and here he was. Nuzzling Levi's arm, his alpha smiled down at him. Despite being alone, Levi whispered  
"Hey, beautiful"  
Eren's cheeks dusted lightly. He was sure as hell, that he wasn't beautiful right now. Semi-scared there was someone listening, he matched his mates whispers  
"Hey... I'm in hospital?"  
"Yeah. You woke earlier, do you remember?"  
"It's foggy, but... what happened with..."  
"They're not completely sure. There's two heartbeats in there, with evidence of a partial miscarriage"  
"There was only two..."  
"You knew there was two?"  
"Y-yeah... I'm sorry"  
And just like that. Those emotions rushed to overwhelm him. Eren was riddled with guilt. For both his pups and Levi... he'd wanted them gone. He'd broken Levi's trust. He should have told him... before. Before they fought. His scent souring as he tried to shift away from Levi   
"Eren, it's ok. I don't know if you remember, but I understand. I understand now, and I'm sorry"  
"N-no. It's me. I'm bad..."  
"You're not bad. Your body has been under extreme stress. Coming off your medication. Struggling with your morning sickness, and looking after Viren. Growing two pups inside of you. You're not bad. I was the one who messed up, by not realising sooner. I knew your scent was changing, I just never thought we be having another pup"  
"You said you didn't want more... that it was a good thing we only had one"  
"I'm an idiot. A complete and totally shitty idiot who failed you"  
"No! No... you didn't know"  
"Because you didn't feel safe and loved enough to tell me"  
"I didn't want to... I didn't want to hurt you"  
"You hurt me more by keeping it in. You've always taken the brunt of everything alone in an effort to protect us"  
"Because you're my everything. I never had friends or someone to love me. You give me everything"  
"Except what you need"  
"No. You work hard for Viren and I"  
"I still should have noticed. I left you alone and left you to hurt"  
"It's..."  
"It's not fine. I lost my head. I always seem to do that when I'm with you"  
Looking down, Eren didn't deserve Levi. He knew Levi would never intentionally hurt him, but he'd believed the voices in his head   
"Maybe I'm no good for you"  
"Hey. No. I'm the one that's not good enough for you"  
"You're too good for me"  
"You're an idiot if you believe that"  
"Maybe we're both idiots?"  
He wanted to smile, but he couldn't muster the strength. It was like he'd been run over repeatedly without the pain  
"I wish you weren't quite this bad"  
"Doesn't it make you feel better to know you're not alone"  
"Not really. I just feel flat"  
"Laying in bed will do that to you"  
"Can I go home soon?"  
"Not tonight. They want to monitor the pups. Despite everything, all those vitamins you've been taking has managed to keep your levels okish. You still need to gain more weight. Everything is going to the pups"  
"Are you... are you mad?"  
"Disappointed. Not mad"  
So Levi was disappointed he was pregnant? He should have taken the pills... then they'd be gone. Whimpering, he wanted to be let go. It was like the bubble around them had popped  
"Eren, hey. You're safe. You're ok. We're ok"  
"You don't want the pups. I should have... then you wouldn't have to know..."  
"Oh. No. No. I thought you meant "am I mad about everything?". No. Brat... sorry, Eren. No. I'm disappointed at myself. Having another child, or two, or a dozen with you. I'm thrilled. I couldn't be happier. I just can't believe I missed it, with how sick you've been. I took your word for it, forgetting how you like to hide your pain to protect me"  
"I'm barely showing..."  
"I noticed that. And I'm going to be around more. I'll talk to my boss. I can drop back to training, instead of field work"  
"No. They need you in the field. You get what it's like to be an omega..."  
"Eren. That means more hours. I want to be coming home at reasonable time. I want to be helping with Viren. I want to be there to spend more time with you"  
"But... Levi. You're good with omegas. You treat them like normal people"  
"They are normal people. Besides, I'm doing training. I'm training the people who go into the field. I want more time with you... I know you can look after Viren, but I still want to be there"  
"He does miss you"  
"Not today. He cried and cried for his mummy. He had a tantrum when I told him he couldn't give you cuddles"  
"He's never done that before"  
"I think he had a huge scare when you collapsed like that. We both did"  
"I thought the cramps were from the nausea... I didn't think I was losing them"  
"Paradis hospital is sadly ill equipped in comparison to Shinganshima. They can only preform the very basics of tests. That's why their not sure if it was a miscarriage or something else. One pup did have a lower heart rate than the other, they don't know what's going to happen at this point. But... You know Hanji, she'd going to take over the moment she gets here"  
Levi sounded bitter to begin with, before ending with the sickly sweetness of faked humour with a dash of "trying way too fucking hard". They didn't know, but he could still lose a pup anyway. He could still lose both of them. Then everything would have been for nothing. Levi was probably lashing out at anyone who came too close. He could imagine the alpha yelling and demanding results. It wasn't their fault that the place wasn't as flashy as Shinganshima. It was a tourist town. As far as he knew, the worst a tourist had to fear was a bad sunburn or alcohol poisoning. Maybe a car accident if they had really crappy luck. Shit. He really hoped Levi hadn't... Levi would get to go home, while he was stuck here. The fucked up omega of the psychotic alpha.

"Is he ok?"  
"He's still sleeping, can't you feel him against you?"  
No. Probably because he couldn't feel much of everything and it was wonderful   
"Drugged up. I can feel your warmth and smell you, but I can't really feel anything from the neck down. Levi. He shouldn't have had to see that, ever. Even if he's too young to remember, it doesn't make it ok. I don't want him seeing me like this. Or to hear us yelling. I don't want to fight in front of him. I don't want him scared of his dad or me. I don't want him hiding in the closet, sitting in a puddle of piss and thinking you're going to beat him. And I don't want him feeling what I felt growing up. He's innocent. I'm dirty. But he isn't"  
"You are not dirty. And, neither do I. I lost it when you wanted to go back to that bar. I thought you wanted to leave me"  
Yeah. Ok. If Levi could kindly back off, or start too, that would be great. His alphas scent tainted with hues of anger   
"I thought you cheated on me. And that you didn't want me anymore... because I'm too much work... and that I was just, I don't know... convenient? That you'd broke your promise"  
Levi shook his head as he kissed his hair  
"You were right though. I didn't cheat on you, but I also didn't stay after sex. I didn't even think about what you'd been through or how it would feel"  
"It fucking sucked"  
"I gathered as much. Why didn't you tell me?"  
Because things were complete shit. Because he had a zillion things on his mind all the time. Because he was struggling his arse off trying to make everyone else happy, only to feel like he fell short in every manner. Because he was a weak omega. No matter how he tried, I couldn't change that. He couldn't change the way people looked at him with his son. He couldn't change the people who looked for his alpha because omegas weren't supposed to go out and do things alone...  
"Because you're the alpha... I'm only ever going to be an omega. It's my job to stay home with the children, to cook and clean, to be there for your alpha"  
"Eren. No. What I want was a partnership where you feel equal"  
He could barely remember what that felt like again... he was sleepy, and dying to fall back to sleep. He hated hospitals, and now he'd ended up in yet another one  
"We haven't been like that for a while. Lee, if I hadn't said anything, when you came out the shower, would have told me? That you thought I was interested in cheating on you?"  
Levi sighed, his alpha moving his hand to push Eren's hair back from where he was trying to hide behind his fringe   
"I, honestly, was angry at you. I thought we were supposed to work things out, then you were laughing with someone else. Someone else was making you happy. It fucking hurt. I know I'm not the greatest alpha, but I can't remember the last time I made you happy. The last time I made you smile that... The last time I made you feel comfortable enough to be truly happy. Then you just stop paying attention to me, to get those stupid pills out. I really wasn't expecting them"  
"I didn't think you'd want the pup because you're getting rid of me"  
"I am not getting rid of you. I want you and your pups. Our pups. I just... I can't see how things ended up here"  
"Life. They never tell you what happens after you get your happily ever after"  
Letting out a yawn, Levi kissed his forehead   
"If you're sleepy, you should get some more rest"  
"I'm a little sleepy"  
"Hanji should be here soon, hopefully she can figure this out"  
"Mmm... Lee, have I told you how much I hate hospitals?"  
"I know. I love you, Eren"  
"I love you too, and Viren. Can you make sure he's ok?"  
"He's ok. He's probably going to be cranky when he wakes up"  
"Get him some chicken nuggets. They always make him feel better"  
"Nuggets?"  
"Yeah. They're all he'll eat when he's sick or upset. They work better than ice cream"  
"I didn't know that"  
"That's because he saves all the vomiting and tantrums for me"  
"Things are going to change. I promise you"  
"Mmmm... I want to talk to you more, but I'm really sleepy"  
"I know you are"  
Levi shifted next to him, Eren grabbing his alpha before he could move further  
"You're not leaving, are you?"  
"No, Eren. I'm not going anywhere"  
"Ok... good... I can't loose you, Lee"  
"You're not going to, my precious omega"  
Kissing his forehead again, Levi repositioned him to lay with his head on his chest, the rhythm of his mate's strong and steady heartbeat lulling him to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gargh! I'm still on holiday! Sharing a phone with horrible reception!! The want to edit this is strong.
> 
> If you read this on tumblr, you'll notice I fixed it. Levi is having the real struggle. He wants to keep Eren's safe from the world, and he feels like he's failed Eren over the pup. Eren on the other hand knows life can't stop just because he lost a pup... but... yolo

Bundled into Levi's arms, Levi was holding Eren's head up against his neck. Fuming as he carried his omega into the hotel, having left Viren under Hanji's supervision. He wasn't happy. He wasn't happy at all. They'd discussed all of Eren's symptoms with the woman, Hanji explaining his semi-heat feelings stemming from Eren needing his alpha's love and attention. That bit he could live with, what he couldn't live with was the way they'd treated Eren in his absence. His mate assuring him he'd be fine while Levi sorted out things out with Hanji. The alpha having to head back to the hotel to grab a change of clothes for his mate, and to make sure Hanji knew where all of Viren's things were. In his absence, the staff of Paradis Hospital, in their infinite wisdom had banned Eren getting out of bed, including to use the bathroom... simply due to the fact that his alpha wasn't there to watch him, leading to his mate having an accident and panic attack from said accident. Eren had had a crap time as it was, the pain medication had worn off, the cramps leaving him whimpering in his sleep until Hanji arrived and started yelling at everyone. Instead of finding a more suitable method, Levi had been disgusted to find they'd merely placed a towel under his lover's arse while Eren bled. Not knowing it wasn't the norm for such events, Eren had kept silent about it. It wasn't until Levi had returned to the hospital to find a very distraught Eren, that he found out just what happened beneath the sheets. Maybe it was payback for Hanji throwing her weight around, though not licensed to practice in the hospital, or purely because Eren was an omega, that his mate was treated less than an animal. Furious over it all, he'd bundled Eren up, and left. Eren would get better medical attention from Hanji, even without the use of any equipment. It was her who pointed out the fact that Eren had indeed lost one of the pups, and that the technician had read the scans wrong. As devastated as he was over losing a pup, he was more devastated that omegas were still being treated so fucking badly. His mate had been pregnant with triplets, and it was the lesser formed of the three that he'd lost, and also the cause of Eren's pain, and crippling symptoms.

Carrying Eren up to their room, Hanji was waiting. The woman having built the best nest she could given the limited materials. Dropping a kiss on Eren's head, she then lovingly ruffled his hair as Eren whining away from the gentle touch  
"I know, my Sweetheart. I know. Levi, do you want to help him shower? The hot water should help with the muscle stiffness and cramps"  
"Is he ok to shower?"  
"Yeah. Just be slow and careful with him. He's very tender at the moment"  
"I gathered as much"  
Hanji sighed softly   
"My poor, Honey. It makes me furious over how you were treated. I'll be submitting a very strongly worded complaint to the medical board"  
Eren didn't reply, instead burying his face harder against the crook of Levi's shoulder   
"Can you grab him something soft to wear?"  
"I've already taken care of it, it's all in the bathroom. The kids are napping in my room, Viren's been asking for him"  
"Eren was mumbling for his baby on the way home"  
"He probably wants nothing more than to cuddle with Viren right now. Losing a pup is never easy"  
"No. I've seen it more times than I would have like to have. I'm going to shower him now, can you wait a few hours before bringing Viren in?"  
"Sure. You'll need to get him eating and drinking too"  
"I know..."  
Levi paused, waiting for his emotions to settle slightly   
"... Thank you, Hanji. I don't know what I would have done if you..."  
"Hey. That's what amazing friends like me are for"  
"It... its fucked up. The whole system is fucked up. How many other omegas have been through the same shit? I'm so fucking tired of it"  
"We all are. Anyway, I'm sure Eren's going to be feeling much more human after his shower, though his scent tells me it's going to take some time for him to recover"  
"You can smell him?"  
"Yep. He's hurting so badly right now. His own scent's probably going to play havoc with his mental health right now, so there's scent cancelling soap in the shower. Use it on him, not on you. He really needs your scent right now"  
"When did you get so smart?"  
Hanji feigned insult  
"I've always been smart. You're just blind to my brilliance"  
"Maybe. It turns out I've been blind to a lot of things"  
The emerging smile on Hanji's lips fell again  
"Levi. No. This isn't your fault. It's both yours and Eren's. And all of ours for noticing. As for the pup, these things suck but they also happen. More commonly due to genetic defects, and other problems. Even if the pup had survived, their quality of life may have been next to none"  
"I feel so stupid"  
"You're not. Now go on and clean him up"

Giving Hanji a nod, Levi carried Eren though to the bathroom, gently lowering him down to sit on the toilet, the alpha went about getting the shower organised. With his arms wrapped around his stomach, Eren was whining softly for him  
"It's ok. I'm here. We'll get you showered, then you can rest"  
Stripping himself down, Eren wasn't terribly cooperative as Levi stripped his omega. Too emotionally exhausted, and still feeling the lingering affects of his panic attack, Eren jumped and flinched at Levi's every move. His omega growling in warning when Levi finally got him under the water, before actually taking a swing at him when he tried to clean between his legs. His breathing growing more and more agitated, taking Levi reassuring Eren over who he was and that he was safe, for his fiancée to calm back down. How could he ever thought that Eren would cheat on him? His fiancée was freaking out from him alone helping him shower. 

When Eren was clean, and dressed, Levi helped him back out to the bedroom and into the nest Hanji had made. Settling him down, Eren tugged on his arm until Levi finally gave in and crawled in next to him... naked. Hanji might have thought to lay Eren out a set of clothes, even a pad, but she laid nothing out for Levi to wear, and the alpha had the feeling that was intentional. Sliding his arm under Eren's neck, he wrapped is around his mate's shoulders. Eren already having claimed most of him by throwing a leg over Levi's, and draping an arm across him  
"How are you feeling?"  
Eren sighed and shook his head  
"That good. There's some pain killers on the bedside table. Hanji said they're safe to take"  
Shaking his head again, Eren shuddered against him. Half a moment later, a loud sob rang out. It wasn't completely unexpected, though it's volume was. Dissolving against him, Eren's sobs were heartbreaking. His alpha unusually somber as their mate cried. It wasn't Eren's fault over the pup. Even though he knew it, Eren still felt a great deal of guilt over it, no doubt compounded by the fact he'd very nearly gone through with aborting them, only for this to happen. Feeling his own eyes filling with tears, the two lovers wept bitter tears for the pup that would never be.

 

*  
Having cried themselves out, they'd both fallen asleep holding each other. Waking before Eren, his mate had shifted, now laying face to face with him. Pulling Eren closer, he nuzzled into his cheek. The tiniest purr slipped from Eren's lips before a small yawn. Levi's heart leapt at the purr, it'd been so long since he'd heard a happy purr, even the dregs of a small one   
"Levi?"  
"I love you. I love you, Eren"  
Hugging him tightly, Eren nodded   
"I love you too. Levi... I'm so sorry"  
"You have nothing to be sorry about"  
"The pup... I swear I didn't know there was a third... it didn't show on the ultrasound"  
"Eren, I don't blame you"  
"I do... I lost a pup... I didn't tell you. And I lost one..."  
His lover's scent soured with distress  
"Eren, I love you. This wasn't your fault. I don't blame you. You're not to blame. These things are horrible, but they do happen. We still have one beautiful pup who's missing his other, and two tiny pups inside of you. They need you. I need you. It sucks and it's hurts, but we can't do anything to change the past. Ok?"  
"I feel so fucking guilty"  
Placing his forehead against Eren's, Levi pushed a thin, sad smile to his lips   
"I know you do. And I want you to talk to me about it. Ok? No matter what you're thinking or feeling, I want to know. I need to know. You're my mate. The only omega, I could ever want or need. I want to know everything"  
Eren snorted, but he did nod when it became clear Levi wasn't moving until he did  
"Ok... maybe... maybe, you can um... come into my next therapy appointment?"  
"If that's what you want?"  
"Krista knows how to say things better than I do"  
"I think you say things just fine. When you know, you're actually telling me things"  
Eren dodged his verbal jab, the omega sighing  
"Do you really want me to tell you what I'm thinking right now?"  
"Yes"  
"I need to pee and your squeezing me"  
Levi let out a small laugh, Eren's scent perking up ever so slightly. God. He loved him so much. This was his omega. His Eren. The one who kept struggling forward and carving his own path, no matter the pain it brought him in the process   
"I walked into that one, didn't I?"  
"Yep... Where's Viren? I want my baby"  
"He's with Hanji and Anna. I can message Hanji"  
"Please... I really need him right now. I need to see that he's ok. I feel like I'm going to go crazy if I don't see him"  
"Why don't you go to the bathroom, and I'll let Hanji know you're awake and asking for Viren"  
"You don't mind, do you?"  
"Mind what?"  
"Me asking for Viren?"  
"Eren, no. Of course I don't mind. He's your son too..."  
"I mean... because we've barely talked about everything"  
Pulling back, Levi flicked Eren in the middle of his forehead  
"Right now, talking can wait. We've already decided we're loved up shitty idiots who care about each other. I can smell how confused and distressed you are, and I imagine that's stemming from your omega and the need to see our boy"  
"My omega is a needy arsehole"  
"Then it's a good thing my alpha wants nothing more than to worship you, and to buy you everything you could ever want or need"  
Eren craned his neck, trying to look over Levi's shoulder  
"What are you doing?"  
"Looking for the real Levi. My Levi doesn't worship me"  
"Your Levi is an idiot then. Such a perfect and adorable omega, deserves to be worshipped"  
Somehow his words went straight to his dick. As if he was going to drop to his knees and worship every inch of Eren's body. Fuck. He could happily bury his face between Eren's legs for hours, drinking down his honied slick until he was drunk on it. His arousal spiking in his scent, though it promptly faded as his mind caught up with his shameless dick, or rather his shameless dick remembered the current situation, causing Eren to roll his eyes at him as he pushed Levi away  
"Down boy. I feel like a giant cramp right now"  
Levi's cheeks reddened slightly, or at least they felt as if they did  
"I can't help myself. You're beautiful"  
"And you're acting creepy. Go find our son. And bring my Levi back if you find him"

Crawling to the edge of their bed, Levi looked back over his shoulder as he blindly grabbed the first phone his hand found off the bedside table. Eren was still in the process of gathering himself up, a pained smile in his face as he tried to hide how poorly he felt. He couldn't take Eren's pain, what he could feel through their bond left him queasy at was, but he could distract Eren a little to lift his spirits  
"You know, I don't think I want this Levi person setting eyes on you"  
"You're a bit late to be thinking that, he's already knocked me up"  
"Then he better take good fucking care of you"  
"He does. He really tries his hardest to... though I'm wondering what he'd think if he saw you here?"  
"If I was him, I'd tear me to pieces. Though if I was him, I'd never let you out of my sight"  
"Can you save the bloodshed and dominating alpha shit for when I'm not bleeding? I mean..."  
Eren's attempt at returning his playful banter came to abrupt end, his hand moving to his stomach as he fled towards the bathroom. That hadn't gone as expected. Idiot. It was too fucking soon. He knew it was too soon. He shouldn't have pushed. He had a crap sense of humour... Eren deserved more than his bad attempts a humour.

 

*  
Cuddling Viren, Eren was purring softly. Hanji had examined him, and was pleased with what had passed. Which was gross in his opinion. He already had an ultrasound booked, but now both Hanji and Levi would be joining him for it. Things like bending and heavy lifting had been banned by Hanji. Basically anything that could cause the loss of another pup, or a complete miscarriage. He didn't mind too much. For the first two days out of hospital, Levi and Hanji had him on strict bed rest. Anna and Viren had both made him Get Well Soon cards, Viren yelling "mummy!" when Hanji brought both kids down to see him. Anna more reserved as she hung back at Hanji's side, letting Levi lift Viren on to the bed, where his son practically tackled him for a cuddle. Kissing his baby's soft hair, his omega had finally taken a deep breath and let him have the moment to cuddle his son. 

Though still tender, Eren was tired of bed. He was also tired of having Levi hovering without taking a break. Hanji had tried to take the alpha down to the beach with the two kids, but Levi had sat by his side instead... while he napped off and on. He didn't need Levi to watch him sleep, even if his nightmares were being stupid. He'd had a not so lovely nightmare about killing Reiner. On his medication, he'd had nightmares but not quite as vividly as the one he'd had the previous afternoon. He'd scared the fuck out of Anna and Viren, while trying to escape Levi, not quite completely awake, his stupid mind had told him that Levi was actually Reiner, come to kill him for killing him. He'd ended up pinned in Levi's lap as he wailed for his freedom. Both kids were quiet all night, Hanji taking Viren in case of another nightmare. Now reunited with his son, he was enjoying hold the small boy tight as he sat between Eren's legs, playing with one of his cars. With his head on his son's shoulder, he was more than happy to listen to boy babbling. It was strange to know his omega was finding more comfort in these moments with Viren, than he had when curled in Levi's protective hold. His son had seemed to hate him so much. It wasn't like Viren was clingy all the time since he'd gotten out of hospital, but the moments he was, Eren loved them. Kissing the boy's cheek, Viren returned the kiss. Blowing a raspberry against Eren's lips. Eren laughing as he nuzzled into Viren's cheek, wiping his spit back on him as the boy giggled   
"Viren! Don't be rude to mummy"  
Eren rolled his eyes. Levi was like a dog with a bone. If anyone so much as looked at him the wrong way, his alpha went all alpha male... and as he hadn't been allowed to leave their room, unfortunately everyone in their small family had copped it. Even Anna...  
"Levi, he's playing"  
"He shouldn't be rude"  
"He's playing, and he's bored"  
"I can take him"  
Hanji was sitting on the sofa with Anna in her lap, the pair of them reading, or rather, Anna was pointing out the animals in the picture book while Hanji praised her non-stop. Levi was the only one in a mood it seemed, the alpha sitting on his side of the bed with a scowl on his face  
"No. He's fine. I'm bored too. Can we go do something?"  
"You need to rest"  
The words were like Levi's automatic reply to everything. Eren was tired of them. He'd rested. He'd more than rested. He'd rested to the point of being a comatosed lump ...  
"Can we go scatter Grisha's ashes?"  
"He can wait"  
They'd already missed the anniversary of scattering Zeke's because Levi wanted him to rest... If he rested any longer, he'd become one with the bed and the hotel room, and if he was stuck in bed any longer, their holiday would be over with him having only seen the bar, the beach and the hospital... which wasn't much of a holiday in his opinion  
"Hanji. Am I allowed down to the car and to walk maybe 10 metres?"  
"That depends. Levi looks ready to dismember me"  
"For forks sake. I'm fine. I've rested. I'm done resting"  
Trying not to swear in front of two miniature parrots was much harder than he remembered  
"Eren, you need to rest"  
"For the sake of the fork, he should be alright Levi"  
"And what if he loses the pups?"  
"Levi. He had a partial miscarriage. The bleeding has lessened, and he's been resting. It's not like he's going to run a marathon, or lift weights"  
"No. And that's final"  
He got that Levi was worried for his health, but his alpha seriously couldn't think he intended to spend the last few days in Paradis, in bed. He still had things he wanted to do. He wanted to go shopping. He wanted to buy Titan a few gifts from Santi Paws, and have a look for gifts for Anna and Hanji. He remembered how many shinies were in the shops in the mall... Levi and Viren were already shopped for, he just wanted a couple more small things...  
"Are you serious?! I know you hate him, but he was still my father. He died for me. To protect Viren. We already missed Zeke's anniversary because you said I had to rest. All I want to do is scatter his ashes"  
"And all I want is for you to rest. You lost enough blood that they had to give you a transfusion, or did you forget?!"  
How could he? Levi was fussing like there was no tomorrow. In his lap, Viren looked up at him, his son's bottom lip quivering  
"I'm sorry, baby. Here, why don't we get teddy?"  
Kissing Viren's hair, his son started shuffling off the bed, Eren helping to lift him down  
"Eren!"  
"Seriously Levi. I know you're worried, but I'm sick of this. Hanji, can you drive? Levi's not coming"  
"You're not going anywhere"  
Climbing off the bed, he walked over to his suitcase. Ignoring Levi's following glare   
"Eren, you're not going"  
"Levi. That's enough"

Now Hanji was stepping in. His alpha might not be listening to him, but she was. Gathering Viren up as he walked over to her, she was prepared with his teddy, making space next to Anna for him  
"Eren will be ok. I'm monitoring him, and he's right. He has been resting. It's all he's been doing. Staying inside all the time isn't healthy"  
"See! Hanji agrees. If she thought it'd cause any danger to the pups, she wouldn't have"  
"Then go with Hanji. Do whatever the fuck you want"  
Anna didn't miss a beat, echoing her Uncle Levi  
"Fuck!"  
The little girl said it with such conviction that Hanji cackled with laughter. Eren trying not to laugh as he pulled Grisha's ashes from his bag  
"Oh baby. Don't say that again. Levi, stop glaring at me. You know it's better to ignore it"  
"If anything happens to him, or the pups, I will never forgive you"  
"If you're that concerned, you could come with us?"  
"No. My wishes and opinions are obviously not needed. I'm heading down to the bar"  
Great. Now Levi was sulking... his omega flaring up remind him that Levi was their alpha, and by not following his alpha's wishes, he was being bad... Whining softly, he looked to Hanji with guilty eyes   
"Levi. You're being an ars... you're being a forker to Eren. The whole point of coming down here was to scatter Grisha's ashes and to spend some quality time together with your family"  
"Look. I don't want him going out"  
"He's going to be just fine"  
"And what if he's not?! What if something happens?! I couldn't save our pup, but here... here I can at least make sure nothing happens to him"  
Eren looked to Hanji, Hanji nodding as she gathered up the kids  
"I'll give you two a moment"

Carrying the box of ashes over to the bed, Eren placed them down before sitting beside Levi. Taking his alpha's hands in his, he sighed deeply, trying to pick his words carefully   
"Levi. I'm ok"  
"Whatever"  
"Don't whatever me. Listen to the words I'm telling you. I understand you're scared and you're worried. But I've been resting for the last four days. We are due to leave in like three days. I've spent more time in here, than I have with you and our son. I'm not cramping like I was. I've been sleeping. I've been eating and resting. But I might just lose my shit if you make me stay in this room any longer. You know I hate I sitting around, but I'm not doing anything strenuous. And I want to remember this holiday for more than losing a pup"  
"I don't want to lose you. I'm scared of losing you"  
Leaning in, Eren nuzzled at his alpha's face. His anger faded as his defences were torn down by his alpha's worried scent   
"Levi, I'm ok. I'm here and I'm ok. I know you're scared, but you can't keep me in here forever. When we go back to Shinganshima, you'll go back to work. Hanji said I can go back to dancing"  
Levi shook his head  
"You're not going back to dancing"  
He was expecting that one  
"We have our windup's in December. I've talked to her about it. She said it'd be ok, as long as the ultrasound says these two little guys are still fine. Life keeps moving, Levi. And yes. I'm still feeling it. And yes, you're going back to work. Hanji's going to start her IVF and I'll be going with her to her appointments. Marco and Jean are probably going to leave soon, and Titan is going to be mad we left him alone again"  
"I don't want you to suffer"  
"I'm suffering from being trapped in here. You knew Zeke's anniversary was important to me. And you knew I wanted to scatter Grisha's ashes on the anniversary"  
"You don't owe them anything"  
"I might and I might not. Neither of them are alive to talk to, or to ask. But Zeke did take me in... and Grisha did protect me. Both gave me a voice in their own way, and both took my voice away. I want to scatter Grisha's ashes for myself. I need to know he's gone"  
"It's been three years"  
"And? That means nothing to these people. They had my father working for them for over a decade. They have money and time... and as much as I want to believe they're gone, there's no proof"  
"That's all the more reason I shouldn't let you out my sight"  
"And what? If you had your way you'd keep me chained up? Eating and drinking out a dog bowl"  
Pain flickered over Levi's face, Eren striking a low blow  
"I want to keep you safe"  
"And I am"  
"I couldn't even... with the pup. I couldn't do anything"  
"So does that mean I can't leave your side ever again?"  
"I'd honestly rather you didn't"  
"You know that's not going to happen. You can't take me to work with you. And you'd be lost at a Pole Dancing class. We all had a scare"  
"I can't get it out my head. The blood down your thighs, the way you swayed. The way you said you "didn't feel good". I can't stop thinking about it"  
"I'm sorry"  
"You don't need to be sorry. I'm sorry. I know it's important to you, but you're important to me"  
"You're coming to the next ultrasound, and I'm not going to push myself. I'm not going to do anything that risks the pups"  
"I flushed those pills"  
"I noticed the box in the bathroom"  
Levi took a deep breath, releasing it slowly before speaking   
"Do you want these pups?"  
"What?"  
"I know you're not ok. But in all of this, I never stopped to ask if you wanted them"  
"If you do"  
"Forget what I want. You're the one who's carrying them"  
"Then... I do. But I'm scared, Levi. I'm scared of them hating me like Viren does"  
And scared of giving birth. And scared of being in charge of two small pups. He and Levi had drifted taking care of one pup. He didn't know what to do with three. What if this fractured them apart forever?  
"Viren doesn't hate you"  
Eren wasn't completely sure that wasn't the case   
"No. I suppose not. But three pups... I don't want to lose us. We barely have time together as it. And when we do, we can never stop being parents. We can't even have sex without worrying that Viren is going to need something, or going to walk in... then there the cost of raising them. School isn't cheap. Day care isn't cheap. Viren needs to socialise as it is... and names. We have to choose names. And the morning sickness"  
"So you want to abort?"  
Eren shook his head  
"I couldn't... I had those pills and I still couldn't do it. I thought I wanted to, but then losing a pup. Levi. I don't think I can. What do I do? You said you were relieved we only had the one. And we're only just starting to work out things between us. We can't have a honeymoon with three small pups needing us, and what's Viren going to think? And Titan? My poor fur baby is still getting over Viren, and it's been three years..."  
"Eren, you're babbling"  
"Because I don't know what to do. I didn't think I'd fall pregnant again. I know they said I could have children, and even have a natural birth if I chose to, but I'm scared. What if there's complications? What if the pups die because I can't even give birth properly. I'm a shitty omega. I can't manage with one pup. I tell him everyday I love him... but I feel like he knows I tried to run away from both him and you. And I don't know if I can say I won't try and run again. I don't know if I'm strong enough to be what they all need"  
"I know you're strong. I know if anyone could do it, you could"  
"But... I also wanted to foster... there are so many omegas out there that need help. What if we have an omega? I don't want them to present as young as I did. I don't want them going through what I did"  
"Eren, hey. Viren hasn't presented, and when he does, I'm going to love him just as much no matter what dynamic he presents as. These pups, I'm going to love them too"  
"You can't know that... and then there's you. Y-you have a fucking bullet in you because of me. What happens if it moves? What happens when it moves and you can't live the kind of life you want? It's all my fault, Levi. Everything bad that's happened to you, was because you got involved with me"  
"And everything good that's happens to me, is because of you. I don't have the answers to all your questions. I wish I did, but I don't"  
"I don't want to lose another pup"  
"Neither do I. That's why I don't want you going out. I don't want to risk your health"  
"Staying inside is risking my health. My nightmares have come back, so have my panic attacks. It feels like..."  
Eren trailed his sentence off with a shake of his head  
"It feels like what, Eren?"  
"It feels like if I don't move from this hotel room, I'm go to go backwards. And it's scary"  
Levi released his left hand, his alpha moving to cup his face   
"I don't want you to be scared. I don't like telling you that you can't do things... I'm sorry I let my fear turn to anger. I'm sorry I snapped at you"  
"No. It's... coming off my meds. If my mind can take it the worst way possible, it has been. I got mad too"  
"I wonder if Hanji can give you something for that?"  
"I don't want to take anything that will possibly harm these two"  
"You were taking your nausea pills, and your sedatives"  
"I don't want to be drugged up all the time"  
"We should still talk to Hanji, or your doctor, if you prefer. If I have to go back to work, I need to know you're not going to be having panic attacks at home"  
Eren bit his lip, looking away from Levi. Levi forcing his chin up and him to face his alpha again   
"What? What aren't you telling me?"  
"Promise not to get mad?"  
"Eren, tell me"  
"Do you promise?"  
The look on Levi's told him the alpha knew he wasn't going to like hearing what he was about to say  
"Eren. If there's something going on, I need to know"  
"I... I've had a few. Not just coming off the meds, but before"  
"I thought they were getting better"  
"I did too... but I've had a few. Mostly at home"  
"And what about the ones not at home?"  
"Over stupid things. Being late to dance class. Starting classes. Viren misbehaving..."  
"Why didn't you tell me?"  
"Because I didn't want you to worry"  
"Damn it, Eren"  
Levi promised not to get mad... but there he was, getting mad. Eren flinching at his tone   
"I'm sorry. I. I wish you'd let me help you"  
"What am I supposed to say? My heart still races each time I hear something loud? I still jump when someone knocks on the door? I'm still waiting for someone to come along and kill me?"  
"If it helps me understand, than yes. What about the ones at home? Do you know what triggers them?"  
"They're stupid"  
"That's for me to decided. You don't get to chose what triggers you. Now, what happened?"  
"It's mostly Viren. He's a pup, and he doesn't know any better"  
"Viren triggers your attacks?"  
"When he hurts himself or he's sick. Or when I have to smack his bum for misbehaving. I know. Ok. I know I'm not like my parents. I know I'm not like Zeke and teaching him physically because "I love him" and want him to be "good". I hate seeing him cry. I hate when he's been naughty and I have to smack his bum, even when I've explained everything to him... he... he also called me dirty"  
"Eren..."  
"Don't. Ok. I know. And I'm careful. I always put the kids down for a nap when I feel one starting"  
"Why don't you call me?"  
"Because you're working. I don't want you to see how worthless I am"  
Having kept surprisingly dry eyes through their conversation, Eren broke down on his last sentence. Pulling him into his lap, Levi kept a firm hold on his hand as he started to rock him, crooning softly as he held him protectively  
"I wish you could see you're not dirty"  
"I feel it. When I wake up, sometimes I feel him on my skin, Levi. I swear I can smell him"  
"He's dead"  
"I know he is. I know. But I never saw his body. I never saw anything. I keep thinking... what if he isn't. What if he's in a coma like Bertholdt was?"  
"I saw the photos, Eren. You know I did"  
"That was you... I don't even know I'm scattering my dad. I didn't get to see him. I didn't get to see Zeke. I'm still doing what everyone is expecting and forcing me to do. What if dad survived? What if it's not him? What if he's out there and he's hurting? What if they have him?"  
"Eren, it's been three years. It's been three and a half years. If Grisha was out there, he would have made contact sooner"  
"What if he can't?"  
"You're going to drive yourself crazy worrying about all of this"  
"I already feel crazy. I'm sick of it. I wanted to get out of my head down here. To see the ocean again. To watch Viren play in the water and to prove to you that I can be a good omega... so you didn't abandon me"  
"You are a good omega. I hate that you feel you have to hide everything and push us all away, in order to protect us. I'm your mate. I want to be your equal"  
"I'm pretty sure the hospital made it clear that that would never happen"  
"Yeah. Well. Things are going to fucking change"  
"You can't change a system like this"  
"Want to fucking bet? No one messes with my omega and my pups. Ever"  
Eren whined at the burst of anger in Levi's. It stung at his nose, almost burning as it forced its way into his senses  
"Sorry. I forgot my suppressants. That's another reason I didn't want you leaving. I feel like I'm going to go into a rut with everything happening"  
"I'm pregnant, you can't go into a rut"  
"It's rare, but it happens. Just like you feeling so overwhelmed you go into heat. Most alphas are too up themselves to ever go into one over worry"  
"Then there's nothing to worry about"  
Stroking Levi's cheek, his alpha didn't smile at his bad humour   
"I love you, Lee. But I'm going to scatter Grisha's ashes today. With or without you"  
"I better go with you. The last thing the hotel needs is me trashing the bar because I'm worried over you. But we are not stopping to get flowers"  
"No... I just want to scatter his ashes and lay him to rest with his son"  
"If you ask me, it's still more than he deserves"  
"I know. I know I don't love him. And I don't forgive him for killing mum. I also know I owe him for getting me out of there. I feel like maybe, once the ashes are scattered, that favour will be repaid. Or something. Maybe I'm hoping it will? He did die to protect me"  
"And I would die to protect you"  
"I would never fucking forgive you if you did. I would revive you just to punch the shit out of you for it"  
"Eren, you don't see how amazing you are. You birthed Mina. You were there for Anna and for Anka. You fought your fucking hardest to bring Viren into the world. When I met you, you had fucking glass hanging out your side, yet you were still cracking jokes. You run the whole apartment, when you used to ask permission to do anything. You helped Erwin man up and marry Mike. You helped Hanji through the loss of Moblit, you're still supporting her arse. You've been battling with your depression, the lost of a pup and the trials of motherhood. You put up with me. When anyone else would have already left. You've made all our lives better"  
"It doesn't feel that way. I turned you into a killer. I killed people and took babies from their mothers. I can't seem to connect with Viren and I lost my shit when I went off my pills"  
"You also kept going, even when I was hurting you. You were the adult here. Not me..."  
"I don't know about that..."  
"That's because you can't see yourself like we do. You're perfect to me"  
"You would have said I was perfect with my scars. I don't feel perfect Levi. I don't want to try to be perfect, but that's all I know. It's still all I fucking know. I'm still wondering if something I do is bad or wrong. If I'm dirty... or if it's ok to have the feelings I do for you. I don't know what we are to each other, I mean. I love you, and you love me, but without a set date for the wedding, are we even still engaged? We haven't been talking. And I can't just erase months with a few weeks of affection. My brain doesn't work like that. It felt like we were house mates they had a child together and occasionally fucked... like I was the duty bound omega, in everything but chains, left to rot away in loneliness or some shit. I can't click my fingers and make that go away. I'm not saying we aren't tying, but what I am saying is that you need to be patient with me, because right now, I'm all out of it. We broke each other's trust, when we used to be stronger than this. There was a time we never would have thought for a second either of us had cheated. If we're having these pups, we need to bring them into a loving home. You need to give me space to breathe, and I'll do my best not to lose at you when you're not being reasonable. Ok?"  
"I don't know what to say?"  
"Say you understand?"  
"I don't know if I do"  
"Levi. Me doing things, I need to do more to improve myself and I'm going to be mad at myself. I'm probably going to yell and scream, and somedays you're probably going to hate me"  
"I can't hate you. I could never hate you"  
"I don't know. You have called me a "stubborn shit" more than once"  
"I never hated you. Fuck. You're the one who seems to know everything these days. When did that happen?"  
"It didn't. And actually, I'm pretty sure I told you that I don't, and I've got a lot to work through"  
"We both do"  
"Mhmm. Anyway. Hanji is probably still in the hallway, listening to all of this. We should get ready"

Proving him right, and knowing it would draw an internal laugh, Hanji called out   
"No, I'm not! Keep going!"  
Levi let out a low growl, Eren shaking his head as the alpha went to go her, apparently Levi couldn't handle a joke right now  
"It's ok"  
"It's not ok"  
"It is. Let's just get changed. She is buying us lunch as it is!"  
"Since when am I buying lunch!?"  
"Since you decided to listen in!"  
"Fine! Now kiss and make up!"  
Leaning in, Eren pressed his lips to Levi's in a simple kiss. Stealing a kiss from his alpha, Levi didn't look too impressed   
"Since when do you do what she says?"  
"Since I've discovered Hanji occasionally has great ideas"  
"I'll believe it, when I see it"  
Leaning in, Eren pressed another kiss to Levi's lips   
"See. Great idea. Small kisses are nice"  
"I suppose you have a point"  
"I believe it was my idea!"  
"Hanji, go away! Or your going to hear something you shouldn't!"  
Eren could almost see the female alpha laughing as she did  
"I do love you, Lee. Even if things get worse before they get better... if they get better. Don't forget that"  
Levi looked defeated, pressing a warm kiss to Eren's lips, Eren accepted it happily. He'd gotten so much shit off his chest that he actually felt better, despite it meaning that Levi was now weighed down by it all. His alpha knew how to sort all this crap out, and how to help him in ways only Levi could. Some of the things he'd might have been cruel, but he needed Levi to know that things between them were still a work in progress  
"I love you, Eren. I can't live without you. I can't lose you, I'm probably going to make things worse. I always fucking seem to without even fucking realising. I'm sorry I fucked this. And I'm sorry I hurt you"  
Levi sentences came in short bursts, as if he was struggling with his emotions  
"We both fucked this... but we're gonna figure this out"  
"Yeah. And we're going to have that huge white wedding you've been dreaming of"  
Eren winced, that one was a bit too soon... even if he'd been the idiot to harp on about it  
"No wedding talk?"  
"Not just yet. That one's going to take a lot of time to be ok with"  
"I'm sorry. I knew how important it was to you... is to you"  
"I just want to be yours, legally. It's still hard out there, even wearing two rings and being bonded to you. Some places I can't even enter unless I have an alpha. Some places won't let me buy things without my alpha's permission. Omegas are supposed to be being treated better, but that's a load of political shit..."  
Scratching nervously at his wrist, he forcibly stopped himself. He didn't need to be falling back into that. No matter how tempting it was. And this was too important to be cut short by ingrained behaviour   
"... That sounds unromantic as fuck. What I mean is, I want a real home, with an alpha who loves me for me. An alpha who trusts me and gives me enough room to breathe, but still wants me close. I want a job. I want to earn money for Viren's schooling, and for these two pups. I want to marry the only alpha that I used to trust completely before all this. I want to work on fixing that trust. I want to be yours legally, and be by your side. I want to be able to brag that you're my husband. I want to feel like a prince for a day, and have everyone looking at us, knowing they'll never have what we have. I've been waiting for so long since I proposed to you. Since before I proposed to you. I've been waiting. But every time I brought the wedding, you'd just brush it off. That was when I realised that maybe you didn't want to marry me at all..."  
"Eren..."  
Climbing off of Levi, Eren walked back to his suitcase. His body shaking like a leaf. He knew Levi would never hit him, yet his anxieties had his heart racing for daring to talk to his alpha that way  
"So that's why I can't handle any more talk about weddings right now. Hurry up and get changed"  
"Eren, I want that too"  
"You might, but like I said. It's too soon and too stupid to think a wedding will fix things. I want us to be in a good place first. Ok?"  
"I really don't deserve you"  
"No. Maybe. I don't know. We'll talk about it when the times right"

 

*  
Scattering Grisha's ashes was far more liberating than he knew. It wasn't as if he was free from the sins of his father, but it felt like... like he was finally leaving him behind completely. Fat tears of relief rolled down his face as Levi held him upright. No one saying anything as he slowly brought his emotions back under control. His scent leaking past the barrier to scent cancelling soap to surprise all of them with the hues of relief and happiness in it, despite his knees having given out and snot all over his lips. Levi had cleaned his face up, but he still felt like a mess. Hanji had her hands full, entertaining the kids so he and Levi could have the moment alone.

Reappearing from the direction of the lookout a good half an hour after he'd finally said his goodbye. Anna and Viren both confused and upset over not being able to play in the water. Viren more so than Anna. Standing on the bridge, Anna had hold of his shirt, the girl watching his every move as his father's ashes started to sink. Nuzzling into him, Levi pressed kisses to his shoulder as he rubbed his other shoulder. Tugging harder on his shirt, Eren looked down to Anna. Her wide innocent eyes filled with concern   
"Uncle Eren, why are you crying?"  
Letting go of Levi, Eren lifted Anna to his hip. Levi tensing, the alpha probably counted lifting the little girl as heavy lifting. He couldn't tell her everything or anything really. She was much too innocent to know his shady past  
"Uncle Eren is crying because he's happy"  
"You don't look very happy. Is your daddy where my daddy is?"  
"Yeah, baby"  
"Was your daddy like my daddy?"  
"No, baby. Your daddy was the best dad anyone could have had. He was like a father to me, and everything I wish my daddy was"  
"So your daddy wasn't a good person?"  
"He was misguided and did a lot of bad things. But he thought he was right in his own way. Your daddy was amazing, and he loved you very, very much"  
"I miss my daddy"  
"I know you do. But you have your mummy, and me, and Uncle Levi, and Uncle Erwin, and Uncle Mike. And then there's your grandparents. We all love you so much"  
"Do you have your mummy too?"  
"No, she died when I was a little kid"  
Anna bit her lip, before brightening   
"You can share my mum. I love you and I love her. So you can share. But not too much"  
"Thank you, Anna. But what about Uncle Levi? Who will be with him?"  
"Uncle Eren, you're so silly. He can share mummy too"  
This kid had it all figured out. Hanji's face was filled with glee as she looked to Levi   
"Come here son, give mumma Hanji a hug"  
Levi heaved a heavy sigh as he glared at Hanji. Viren was looking up at Hanji, but the small boy was clearly lost. Kissing Anna's cheek, he set back down, holding her hand as she grabbed Viren's   
"Hanji, fork off and be born as something better"  
"That's no way to talk to your mother. You're lucky I'm not going to wash your mouth out with soap, young man"  
"You should put him over your knee and spank him"  
Pulling him back, Levi wrapped his arm around his waist. Eren letting go of Anna's hand as Levi growled   
"Eren, you're not supposed to encourage her"  
Laughing, Hanji gathered up both Anna and Viren onto her hips  
"Oh my god. Nooooo. He'd kill me in my sleep. I'll leave all that to you. Is there anything else you want to say? We should be going soon"  
Eren had already said all he mentally needed to. Hello to Zeke and goodbye to Grisha... he hoped wherever both alphas were, they'd have a chance to talk properly. To ask each other the questions he was never able to. Nodding to Hanji, his breath caught for a moment as Levi lifted him off his feet. Draping his arms over Levi's shoulder, his alpha gave him a soft smile  
"How do you feel?"  
"Better. I feel lighter"  
"I'm sorry about before"  
"Don't be. Even I didn't know how releasing this would be. Let's head back to Paradis. I think it's time we had a drink for Isabel and Farlan"  
"You're not drinking"  
"I didn't mean me. I know you haven't had that drink yet, or that cigarette"  
"I don't need them anymore. I'll never forget them, but you've plugged those holes"  
"I've plugged your hole"  
Levi groaned, as Hanji wrinkled her face and poked his tongue out   
"Don't want to hear it. But if there's drinks to be had, it's tequila time"  
"Hanji, you don't need tequila"  
"I don't need it, but I'm not going to say no. Especially if this time next month, I'm pregnant"  
"Yep. Let her have a drink Levi, and if you're good, I'll make it up to you tonight"  
Levi raised an eyebrow   
"And how are you going to do that?"  
"I have my ways"  
"You're still recovering"  
"And your mind's in the gutter..."  
Leaning up, Eren whispered in Levi's ear   
"... I was thinking we could go on a date. Just the two of us... but if you're not interested..."  
"I think I could be very interested"  
"Good. Because you're paying and Hanji's baby sitting. We have a lot to talk about, and some real grown up time to do so"  
"Mmm. I like the sound of that"  
"I thought you might. I might even let you take me shopping"  
"You're not supposed to push yourself"  
"I'm not... but I have a few things in mind, and I don't feel like shopping alone"  
"So this isn't fun shopping?"  
"Shopping is always fun with me. Unless you want me to invite Hanji?"  
"Nope. No. My wallet and my hand are yours"  
Kissing Levi on the cheek, Eren nodded. Leaning back to look to Hanji   
"Can you watch Viren tonight? Levi has promised to take me on a date"  
"Oooooh. Wait... can I chaperone?"  
"Nope. Adults only"  
Hanji blew a raspberry, cut short after just a moment   
"Mummy! Stop it!"  
Smacking Hanji's face, Anna wore a fierce frown   
"I don't want to go on your stupid adults only date. I'm happy with the kids. Maybe we'll go on our own date?"  
"As long as Viren is in bed by 6, and you treat him a gentleman"  
"He shall dine on the finest of nuggets. What do you two say? Fries and nuggets for dinner, then a movie?"  
Viren wasn't too sure, but Anna was all smiles  
"Yes! Thank you, mummy! Can we watch barbie?"  
"I don't know if the hotel has barbie, but we can take a look"  
"Thank you, mummy! And we need something for Viren. He's a baby, so we've got to pick a show for him too"  
"Yep! And we'll have lunch with Uncle Eren and Uncle Levi, then we'll do whatever you two want. I'm all yours"  
"Mummy. I love Uncle Eren, but I love you more"  
"I love you too, my baby girl"  
Let out of everything and looking confused, Viren started to cry  
"Awww. No. Aunty Hanji loves you too, little man"  
Kissing his cheek, Viren kept crying. Standing Eren up near his car, Levi crossed his arms as he waited for Hanji, who had the keys  
"Hanji, stop traumatising my son"  
"I didn't mean to!"  
"I'll sit in the back, we can't have my little man crying his eyes out before his big date"  
"No, I'll sit in the back. My legs are shorter"  
"Awww. All the kids in the back. Maybe we'll leave you trapped in there, and I'll take Eren on that date"  
"As much as I'd love to go on a date with you. I kind of need my alpha right now"  
"I know you do, Sweetheart. You two have a lot to talk about, and I'm happy to watch Viren as long as you need me to. I've played hooky from work this long, a few more days can't hurt"  
Because he wasn't feeling guilty enough over that as it was. He didn't like everyone rushing around to help him out... but, as loathe as he was to admit it, he couldn't have done any of this on his own... and doubly so without Levi by his side  
"Don't fill his head with that shit. Eren, ignore her. She wouldn't be here if it wasn't fine, ok. You just worry about you, and our pups. If you need to go back to the hotel, just let me know"  
"I'm fine, Levi. No bleeding that I know of, and being out of bed feels so much better than being stuck in there. I'm feeling good... not great, but good. Dad's ashes are finally scattered. It feels right"  
"You were crying"  
"It's not like I can stop my feelings. But, you know, it's ok. I've got to keep moving, and this was a good step forwards. Now, I'm going to climb into the back, while you sit in the front. I want to spend some time with Viren"  
"Are you sure? You look pale"  
"I look pale because I've been lacking sun. Besides, you're the one who's paler than I am"  
"Eren..."  
"I know you're worried, but it's ok. Ok?"  
"No"  
"Good. I'll let you plan tonight's date"  
"I don't know how to plan a date"  
"I know. But it's your turn... and I'm not allowed to stress, remember?"  
"You can't throw my words back at me"  
"I can when it's in my favour"  
"You're such a goddamn brat"  
"And you're an arsehole. Now move, Hanji needs help with Anna"  
Giving Levi a quick kiss, he moved to help Hanji. He really wasn't as alright as he was trying to fake, but he wanted to be, and that was the main thing. Besides, he had a date with Levi tonight, and while the alpha wouldn't be getting lucky, he'd take cuddles... even if they ended up being naked cuddles in the bathtub with his alpha laying between his legs. Things were hard for Levi. His small emotional outburst couldn't be ignored. He might be hurting, but so was Levi. He wanted to spoil him a little, especially when Levi had no idea it was coming.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soft Levi is having the real struggles

Even with a complaining Hanji, and two upset pups in the back of the car, Levi was in a good mood. Eren was dozing in the front passenger seat, his mate safe and sound. He hadn't experienced another large bleed, and their date night had ended up being quite sweet. They'd gone shopping before dinner, due to most shops on the mall closing at 5. All their Christmas shopping was done, and unlike the last two years, he actually knew what they were gifting Hanji, Anna, Mike and Erwin. He even knew what he was gifting Eren, though the omega had no clue. He'd seen a bedspread that was so Eren, that he was surprised his mate had missed it. It had way too many beads and sequins for Levi's liking, but the greens and blues were nice... in its own way. He'd paid extra on top to have it posted up to them. It was the only way he knew Eren wouldn't find out. Their date had ended up with dinner on the beach, sitting on a new towel that Eren had wanted, eating fish and chips as the sun set over the ocean. Eren laying in his lap, as they drank in each other's company. After dinner, they'd gone back to their room, where Eren forced him into a bath with him, this time he was between his omega's legs. Eren washing his hair, massaging his scalp and shoulders, and insisting on taking care of him. He'd thought his mate was disappointed in him, over the wedding and everything else between them, but apparently not. Once back on their bed, Eren massaged him into a daze. Which he wasn't allowed to object to, nor was he allowed to return the favour. His omega was kind of amazing. Not that he'd ever doubted that. They'd fallen asleep naked, then Eren had been playful in the morning. Begging for five more minutes, despite no one actually forcing him out of bed. He'd so desperately wanted to keep Eren in a bubble, where he couldn't be hurt, that he'd forgotten there was no stopping him. He'd also been forced to acknowledge the fact he was lucky Eren had stayed in bed for as long as he had. The couple of days after their date night had proven that. Eren insisted on heading back down to the beach, purely to sunbake as the kids played. His fiancée had muttered something about they came all the way to the ocean, so they should make the most of it before it was time to leave, and something about the sun helping his lingering cramping. Yet, his omega had crept off into the water the moment he'd turned his back. When Levi went in after him, he'd ended up dunked for his troubles, forced to resort to throwing Eren over his shoulder and carrying him, scolding him and grounding him, as he laid him out on his towel. The look of love and happiness radiating off his mate, was so pure he'd wanted to stay like that forever. Eren beneath him. His wide green eyes sparkling as goosebumps erupted across his caramel skin. The way one hand was protecting his stomach as Levi prevented his escape. Instead, Eren teamed up with Hanji. The psychopath dumping a bucket of water over his head, while Eren laughed. Chasing her out into the water, Hanji had tripped over her own feet, faceplanting herself into the ocean as Levi returned to where he'd been making sandcastles with Viren. This time with sand that wasn't washing away every two seconds. Now they were on their way home. Eren having taken part of his sedative, with Hanji's permission, was missing the three kids in the back complaining "are we there yet?". Out of everything Hanji could have taught Anna and Viren, he was joyfully awaiting the day when she was the being bombarded with the same fucking question on repeat, like he'd been. A hard night at work had nothing on the three voices coming from the backseat. He'd normally turn up the radio when Viren started getting upset, but with Eren napping, he didn't want to disturb him. His boss was well aware that Eren was having a medical emergency of sorts, and he had permission to remain on holidays until after the ultrasound. Which he may or may not be, packing himself over. He didn't know how omegas behaved during a miscarriage. Eren had taken it hard the first few days when the cramps were at their worst, but now he was taking it too well. Like he was shoving aside his true feelings in an attempt not to deal with them. He'd cried. He'd admitted he was scared, but... it felt like he hadn't let himself really grieve. Levi still didn't feel like he'd grieved properly, even though they'd spent hours intertwined. Holding each other as they both sobbed. If Eren was to lose the other two, he didn't know what to do. Something in his young lover would break. Eren would convinced himself he's no good. He'd throw his walls up, and declared he was bad and broken omega. Or, even worse, he'd say he was fine. He'd throw his walls up and try to be strong for everyone else, while working himself into the dirt trying not to let it show. Like he had... more than once. He was such a stubborn little shit... 

As it was, he couldn't afford to have Eren shut him out any further.

Hanji had been invited to Eren's end of year dance wind up, were as he hadn't been. He was now stuck feeling angry and jealous, each time the fact decided to pop into his mind, while not being able to ask Eren about it. He'd learned his lesson from the tattoo, the bar, and the abortion pills. His record looking less than stellar when it came to trusting his mate. So. He was keeping his mouth shut and hoping Eren had intended to invite him all along. There was also mentally trying to work out what the ever-living-shit went into a wedding. He should know. He was at Hanji's. He was at Erwin's. Fuck. He was the best man at Erwin's. But trying to plan half a wedding was already doing his head in, and he'd only been thinking about it for like a week now. Eren had said no wedding talk, and he'd fully intended to honour that. He wanted to be prepared for Eren asking his opinion on things. He just hadn't realised how many things there were, and he sure as hell wasn't asking Hanji or Erwin. Erwin had given him hell over him marrying Mike, before he married Eren. It wasn't like he didn't want to. He'd known right from the start that Eren was the one for him, no matter how he tried to deny it. And looking back, he knew he owed Eren the biggest fucking dream wedding they could have... with about 5 guests, because honestly, he really didn't want to put up with anyone's bullshit on his wedding day. He didn't know if Eren wanted to wear a dress. Or if he wanted to give birth first? If they brought the wedding forward, they could probably knock something together before Eren popped. If the pup was inside him, that generally meant a great night of sex given how sensitive and receptive Eren's body got during pregnancy, and not having to worry about a new born would definitely help with that... There was also the whole white torture to deal  
With. Or, also known as, "What shade of fucking white everything should be". Or "Why is there was more than one shade of white?". Or "No one could agree which white was which". Did he go white, and match what Eren wanted to wear. But what if his mate wanted to suit up. Did they both were black suits? Did Eren wear a white suit? Did he wear a white suit? Most guys who did the white suit thing were wankers. Erwin wore a white suit, and he's pretty much a complete and total tosser... Then there was Viren. They couldn't leave him out the ceremony, but he was more likely to try and eat their wedding rings than carry them down the isle. Anna would make a cute flower girl, but then Viren would crack the shit over the attention she was getting. There was just too much to think through. He'd seen Eren's wedding magazines with their tiny notes and post-its. His mate had known what he wanted and yet... nope. He'd done gone fucked that one up, as Hanji would say... so, yeah. There was that. Thinking about it all, it was probably better Eren was still sleeping. It was enough to make his scent flare with anger, despite the fact he wasn't actually angry. His alpha was more the issue. While he was having a miniature meltdown, it was less than gently redirecting all his blood south at the fact Eren was pregnant and they could knot him as many times as they wanted. Carrying their pup, his belly would swell, his breasts would form and fuck... It really did feel like he was going to go into a rut, or at least his groin was. The rest of him was smart enough to know Eren needed space to recover... He'd been taking matters into his own hands as it was, careful not to let Eren see him losing to his carnal desires, and careful not to make his mate feel forced in any way, shape or form. His cramping may have subsided, but it was far too soon for anything sexual. Besides, cuddling Eren until he purred was just as rewarding. Each time his mate started to purr, Levi was reminded of just how precious Eren was. Of just how fucking lucky he was that the omega wanted him. Eren was still so soft and warm in his hold. The marvel of which would have worn off long ago, yet Levi knew it never would... even if he'd failed to show Eren how in awe he still was over such things.

Stirring slightly, his omega whined in his sleep. The noise barely escaping him, before Levi was pulling over to the side of the road. He knew that sound all too well. Leaning forward, Hanji looked from him to Eren   
"Why'd we stop?"  
"Nightmare"  
"What? How can you tell? He looks peaceful"  
"If you shut up for two minutes, you would have heard him whine"  
Shutting the engine off, Levi climbed out the car and headed round to Eren's side. Opening his mate's door and undoing his seatbelt, he gently shook Eren awake, wrapping his arms around him as Eren let out another whine  
"It was just a dream. You're ok"  
"Gonna be sick"  
Moving out the way, his shoes didn't escape the splatter. He'd forced Eren to eat a rather large breakfast, and now his shoe were regretting it. Emptying his stomach, both kids started crying in the back. Viren crying for his mum, while Anna was probably scared over how fast everything had happened. Rubbing Eren's back, his mate started to slump forward, Levi pining him back into the car, only to find Eren wasn't quite done. Grimacing, his omega looked up with guilty eyes   
"I'm sorry"  
"No, it's ok. Let's get cleaned up? I've got vomit bags in the glove box"  
"I'm really sleepy"  
"You just sit there. Ok? I'll take care of this"  
Kissing Eren's forehead, his mate was a little warm. His forehead sweaty... a little too sweaty for his liking  
"Hanji, keep the kids in their seats"  
"I can..."  
"You'll be more help by staying in the car with the kids. This isn't the first time we've had this happen"  
"I'm sorry, Lee"  
"Eren, it's ok"  
"Can I get out?"  
"You want to?"  
"Need air"

Lifting Eren out his car, he carried his omega to the back, opening the hatch and sitting Eren inside the boot. Fanning his face, his omega somehow looked even worse  
"Are you going to vomit again?"  
"Maybe. I don't know"  
"How bad was it?"  
Mumbling, Eren started peeling his shirt off  
"Reiner and Bertholdt were there... so not great"  
"I'm sorry you're still going through this"  
"It's not your fault. The sedatives usually help..."  
Grabbing a bottle of water out the back, Levi pushed it into Eren's hands to hide his jealousy. The only alpha Eren should be dreaming about was him  
"Sip at it. You feel warm"  
"I feel gross"  
"I'll grab you a light shirt out. Is there anything else you want out your suitcase?"  
Eren paused, briefly meeting his eyes before looking down  
"What is it?"  
"It's nothing"  
"Eren, tell me. I can't help if I don't know"  
"Can... may I please have one of your shirts? The scent... helps"  
And his jealousy was gone with that small whispered question  
"Of course you can. You don't have to be so embarrassed to ask"  
"I just... I'm a bit nervy"  
"Ok"  
Kissing Eren's forehead, his omega sighed at him  
"One shirt coming right up"  
"You don't need to make a big deal of it"  
"I'm not. Well, I wasn't trying to..."  
"You were. You were all frowny when I said their names"  
"Because it's not fucking fair you're still haunted by those pieces of shit"  
"I can't exactly control my dreams"  
"I know you can't. I love you"  
Cracking the lid on his bottle of water, Eren took a sip. Pulling his suitcase from the back, which involved having to actually climb into his car to reach, Eren flinched at the sound of the latched popping. Yeah. No. He was lucky he'd noticed his mate's distress. He had a feeling it would have been a screaming nightmare otherwise.

Using half a pack of baby wipes to clean them both up, Levi found a shopping bag to stash their shirts in, and his shoes. Gravel under his socks was revolting, but the choices were limited. Making his mate finish half the bottle of water, he settled him back in the front with a vomit bag, the sedatives still in Eren's system leaving the omega fighting to keep his eyes open. Leaning in to kiss Eren properly, his fiancée shook his head, offering a whispered "sorry"... and leaving Levi wishing both alphas were still alive, so he could kill them both and ease Eren's pain... somehow.

Unlike the first half the drive, the second wasn't as pleasant. Eren throwing his guts up again when they stopped to fuel up, then turning paper white when Hanji came back with a mountain of fried food. He would have liked Eren to at least try eating, but he wasn't having any of it. So, in a car that smelt of vomit and fried food, with two unhappy kids, the rest of the drive to Shinganshima took an eternity and a half to pass. Yep. The holiday was over. First thing first was to drop Hanji and Anna off, before heading home to see what mischief Titan had been up to in their absence.

 

Titan was all smooches with Eren the moment the apartment door opened. Hanji had offered for them to stay the night at her house, but with Eren recovering from his nightmare, Levi felt more familiar grounds would be better suited. He was naturally proven right by the way Eren locked all four door locks once they were inside. Carrying Titan around, his fiancée fussed over the fat tom, that was yowling over his near empty food bowl. There were plenty of biscuits still in his feeder, they just hadn't tricked down into his bowl, which was an unforgivable crime in Titan's eyes. Taking care of the littertray, Eren carted Titan off to the kitchen, cracking a can of wet food. Titan too happy to care that Viren was following Eren around, Eren turning his attention to their son once Titan was happily eating.

It didn't take long for things to slip back to normal. By the end of that night, Eren looked ready to pass out, while Viren wanted to sleep in their bed for the night. Eren not too sure if he was going to have another nightmare, excused himself to his room. Bathed and fed, their son was asleep in minutes. Leaving him sleeping on Eren's side, Levi headed into Eren's room, only to find him sleeping atop the covers... with his shoes still on. Taking Eren's shoes off for him, Levi covered his omega with the closest free blanket, pressing a handful of kisses to Eren's temple as he tucked him in. The first thing Eren would probably do once he woke was clean, but that wasn't going to happen. He had so many thoughts and frustrations to work through, only bleach could bring him peace of mind.

 

*  
The few days without Hanji's constant presence was... a bigger hassle than he'd thought they'd be. At least for Levi they were. He'd had to head into work for some paperwork that couldn't be ignored. Eren had stayed home... leaving Levi heavily distracted, causing careless mistakes, then even more time to be wasted over the stupid shitty documents. By the time he got home, he'd worked himself into another near rut state with worry. Eren was fine, though that didn't calm his alpha. Scaring the shit out of his fiancée, he hurled him out of the sofa and into his arms, nuzzling Eren's neck furiously as he held him tight. Like a child after a tantrum, Eren had soothed him. His omega pulling him down to sit on the sofa, nuzzling and kissing him until his alpha finally got the message that Eren was ok, and that nothing had happened in the few hours they'd been apart.

The night before Eren's ultrasound appointment, Levi didn't sleep. He'd been up and back to bed a dozen times, only managing to close his eyes for a few minutes before his kind would become too busy to relax. The apartment was so clean that he'd run out of products. He should have been exhausted from the effort, instead, he found himself pacing with restless energy. He didn't want any more complications. He wanted Eren to be fine. He wanted his pups to be fine. He wanted nothing else to happen to his mate, and he wanted to hurry up and see them. Appearing from his bedroom, Eren once again soothed him. Taking him by the hand, the omega pulled him into his bedroom. Shoving him down on his bed, Eren climbed up behind him and spooned up around him. Huffing and hiding his face against Levi's nape. Opening his mouth to speak, Eren hushed him. Ignoring him, his omega hushed him even louder. It may have taken a few attempts for the message to sink in. Less talking, more sleeping. How Eren could be so calm, he had no idea. Wasn't his mate worried about the health of the two pups inside him? Today they'd know the full extent of Eren's miscarriage, and find out of the pregnancy had to be terminated. He didn't want to lose their pups, but Eren's health came first. No matter what his mate said. There were other ways to have children. They could foster and adopt. They could find a surrogate, if Eren really wanted to. Or, they could try for another child once Eren had recovered... that was still an option...

Tossing and turning, Eren grew sick of his restless struggles. Climbing into his lap, his omega pushed him down, his wrists pinned to the bed as Eren's lips met his, the kiss long and deep, blending seamlessly into the next. When they finally parted, Eren laid along his chest, his face hidden against Levi's neck. Soft warm lips pressing kisses along his neck and jawline between his words  
"I know you're worried. But you're going to make yourself sick if you don't take a breath and calm down"  
Mumbling, Levi felt foolish. He was the older one, yet Eren was providing him with comfort through all of this  
"I can't sleep"  
"I know, and you stink of worry. It's setting me on edge, when I'm trying my hardest to stay positive"  
"I didn't mean to make this about me. You're the one carrying our pups"  
"Levi, I might be carrying them, but you are their father. You have every right to be worried, but these last few days have been really hard. It's been hard to watch you tear yourself apart... and it's harder and harder to stay positive in front of Viren. I keep telling myself they have to be ok... and I need you to let yourself think that too, because I don't know what's going to happen at my appointment. I don't know if I'm going to miscarry the pups, or if everything is going to be ok... so I need you to be ok, so that I can be ok. I can't focus on me or them, not when you're so distressed"  
"I'm just worried that we're going to be told both pups have passed... I don't know what it'll mean for us. Or for you"  
"Don't you think I have the exact same worries that are going through your head? I'm scared too"  
Resting his head against Levi's shoulder, Eren nuzzled his neck   
"I wanted them gone, and now all I can think about is how to keep them"  
"But you didn't really want them gone. You were just trying to make me happy"  
"Seeing you like this, doesn't make me very happy"  
"I know... I'm sorry"  
"If you're really sorry, you'll try and get some sleep"  
"I don't think I can. I'm scared if I close my eyes, I'll lose the three of you"  
"If I kept my eyes open every single time I was scared, I'd never sleep"  
Fuck... Eren was supposed to be relaxed and safe here...  
"Don't, Lee. I can hear you thinking. You're doing a good job, ok. It's coming off my meds that's making things come back to me. We have to relearn all the things that set me off"  
"I wish..."  
"I know what you wish. I wish I could change the past too. It doesn't matter though, because we can't. Now, I'm going to release you, and you're going to cuddle me. In the morning, we're not going to show Viren how stressed we are..."  
"I don't know if I can"  
"You can. You love him, so you will. You're a really good father to him"  
"And you're the best mother he could have"  
"I don't know about that..."  
"I do"  
Eren released his hold, rolling off him as he did. Shifting, Levi moved to spoon up against Eren, a hand on his stomach   
"Mmm. I'm sorry I've been bordering on a rut"  
"It's ok. Like I had to learn my heat was natural and ok to have, we'll figure this rut thing out"  
"I don't want you to freak out if you wake up and I'm hard"  
"I'm used to it. Now go to sleep"

Silence fell between the pair, Eren managing to find sleep in his hold, while Levi watched over him. His eyes refusing to obey Eren's wishes for him to sleep. He'd sleep once he knew his omega and their children were alright.

 

Come morning, Eren was all smiles as he fussed over Viren, though his lingering gazes assured Levi that he was in the shit for not sleeping. Hanji was meeting them at the hospital, as she was coming off shift not long before Eren's scheduled ultrasound. Depending on the results, she would take Viren home with her. They probably had a lot to talk about either way.

The drive to the hospital was painfully silent. Levi running on automatic as he drove. His heart wouldn't stop its stupid racing, and jumped each time Eren made any sound at all. His alpha was just as on edge. It scratched and clawed at the back of his mind, the word "protect" running on a loop. And he wasn't much better as they got inside. A passing patient got too close to his fiancée, leaving Eren having to physically hold him back as he snarled. The poor woman had no idea what the hell she'd done wrong, casting a fearful gaze back over her shoulder as she rushed away. Stalking into the reception area, Hanji barely hid her laughter at his annoyance, directing her attention to Eren instead   
"Hey, Sweetie. I've already talked to the staff, they're running about 10 minutes behind, but have marked you down as here"  
Eren groaned, passing Viren off his hip and into Hanji's hold  
"Seriously. I have to pee"  
His alpha jumped right back to angry, starting towards the reception desk. Grabbing his hand, Eren stopped his progress  
"Don't mind him. He's worried, and cranky"  
"I noticed"  
"Good. Levi, here. Come sit down, and I'll sit in your lap"  
Where Eren should be sitting anyway. Taking the few steps, he sat, and Eren climbed into his lap  
"You need to take a breath for me"  
"People need to get their shit together"  
"As nice as it is that you're getting so possessive, it's scaring me"  
"I'm sorry"  
"It's ok. Think of it this way, if you control that temper of yours a little longer, I'll make it worth your while"  
"You don't need to fucking bribe me. I'm not a fucking three year old"  
He immediately regretted snapping. Eren's bottom lip wobbled, his eyes filling with tears as he struggled off his lap  
"No. A three year old is acting better behaved than you are!"  
"Eren..."  
"Nope. I don't want to hear it. You're so convinced the worst is going to happen that it hurts. You're scaring me, and you're scaring everyone else with the glare"  
"I'm sorry, ok?"  
"No. It's not ok. Don't talk to me until you've thought about your actions"  
Sitting next to him, Eren turned his back towards him. Grabbing Eren's hand, he rested his forehead against Eren's shoulder   
"You're right. I'm a shitty, arsehole of an alpha, who's letting his worry get the better of him"  
"I'm still not talking to you"  
"Ok... Can I hold your hand?"  
"Fine. But I really don't want to talk right now. My anxieties too high"  
Which meant he anything could send him into a panic attack... such as overly worried and smothering alpha. Hanji actually managed to keep her smart comments as they waited for Eren to be called through. Possibly because she knew he was likely to actually attack her if she opened her mouth and sprouted her usually uppity bullshit. Their 10 minute wait turned to 20 before Eren was finally called in. Plenty of time for heat to start building in his gut, and for his blood to rush south as the very start of his rut started. Thankful that his jacket hid his pants, he managed to salvage that dreg of dignity.

Running through their pre-procedure questions, Hanji explained the partial miscarriage. Eren kept his gaze on his exposed stomach, staring at it as if he expected an alien to burst forth from the small swell at the base of it. Trying to relax the omega, the technician explained what an ultrasound was, and what they'd be looking for as he squeezed a generous amount of gel on to Eren's stomach. Eren whimpering at the cook and unwelcome touch as he pulled Levi closer to him. If he hadn't even so mad at the world and himself, and struggling to hold back from mounting Eren right there thanks to his forming rut, he may have felt slightly sorry for the man. All eyes were on him as he started to move the wand across Eren's stomach. It took a few moments, before there was a collecting sigh of relief. Two pups. Still there and still moving. Looking up at him, Eren let out a half sob  
"They're ok"  
"It looks like there's been no negative impacts from the loss of the first pup. No signs of infection, or placental displacement or abruption. These two are a good length, a little smaller but that's to be expected in multi-foetal pregnancies..."  
Levi was deaf to the rest of it. No negative impacts. The two pups were fine. Eren was fine. His lips smashed into his omega's. The kiss they shared hardly G rated as their combined relief flowed through. His heart was singing with happiness. His omega was ok. He was more than ok. He was perfect. Their pups were perfect. Clearing her throat, Hanji tapped his shoulder  
"Guys, I know you're happy, but you're being talked to"  
Not feeling the slightest touch of guilt, Levi looked to the technician, his free hand stroking Eren's hair as he did  
"As I was asking, do you know the risks associated with taking the placental sample?"  
Eren nodded quickly   
"Yes, but we need to know. We don't have a clear cause for the loss of the first pup, so we need to know if it's related to bad genetics"  
How such words could come from such dainty little lips, he had no clue. Nodding his agreement, the technician was slow to prep the needle to be used in the procedure. The pair of them watching their twins moving in awe. It was real. They were having twins...   
"You done good, Levi. You knocked him right up"  
"Shut up, Shitty Glasses. Viren, these are your new siblings"  
His son naturally had no clue what that meant. The boy just making grabbing motions towards Eren, before getting upset when he could reach him  
"I might just step out. I'll meet you both outside when you're done"  
It wasn't exactly the easiest of things to do. Taking a sample without causing Eren too much distress, wouldn't be helped with a crying toddler. Hiding his face against Levi's arm, Eren tried his hardest not to let his fear show, though his tears rolled down Levi's arm to pool on the back of his hand. He hated seeing it happen, even if it was necessary. Eren was fine. He'd been told the best news they'd had in months, that his pregnancy would be ok. One more tiny blip before true freedom was kind of cruel. Finishing up, the samples taken were labelled, Levi signing off on them as Eren tried to calm back down. His mate's inner thighs were quivering like crazy... like they did when Eren was about to come... shit. No. He couldn't pounce in Eren right away. They still needed to be careful for the next day or so...

Levi didn't pounce on him right away. He kept it in his pants until Eren shyly mumbled he needed to pee, and the ultrasound technician left them. Half falling into the toilet cubicle, he pinned his mate up against the door as his lips smashed into Eren's again. There was way too much teeth to begin with, both desperate to feel connected. He could almost hear Eren chanting that he was ok, as his mate whined into his mouth. Levi all but mounting Eren's knee in attempt to get some kind of friction on his throbbing dick. Letting out a small growl of his own, Eren freed his hands, both moving to Levi's belt, as his mate continued to kiss him. Fuck. Fuck. It'd been so long since it was like this. Both needing each other so badly words couldn't convey it. Eren's dominating streak flaring as he took control, shit. Rolling his hips harder, he didn't know if he wanted to mount Eren or be mounted. He just wanted to be connected with his mate... and to come in the worst way.

Freed from the bite of the button and zipper, Eren palmed at his dick until Levi pulled his hand away. The omega's scent growing so sweet, Levi was literally drooling as panted into Eren's hair, Eren's now free hand clutching at Levi's hair, holding him in place. Eren having moved to molest his neck, their erections trapped between them as they both frantically rutted against each other. Wet precum oozing from their swollen members, so close to orgasm that the crowns glowed an angry red, yet no relief was found. It wasn't enough. He was so close, but it wasn't enough. Taking Eren's hips, his omega growled again as he pushed back  
"Eren..."  
"Levi... need you"  
Trying for his neck again, Eren slid a hand down his body, gripping his own erection through his soaked underwear  
"Alpha... please... need your dick"  
Realising how hard they'd been going at it, Levi swallowed hard... fuck. He wanted to come inside his mate. To breed him all over again, but the procedure. His grip on Eren's hips had left marks, they were doing everything except for penetration... he needed to calm down... but looking at Eren's face, he felt relief and lust...  
"There's nothing more I want than to mount you right here and fill you with my seed until it's running down your thighs, but we can't. We need to head home"  
Eren shook his head, his eyes wide as he bared his neck for Levi to remark. Whining, his mate wasn't playing fair. Bringing his pointer finger to his lips, Eren twirled his tongue around it  
"Alpha... I need it... I'm so wet for you, I can smell. How much you want me. Let me do it. Let me taste you. I want to make you feel good"  
Not waiting for the permission he'd asked for, Eren sank to his knees, moaning as took Levi's erection into his mouth. He wasn't sure how he ended up with his underwear around his knees, but as Eren's honeyed mouth closed around his shaft, his eyes rolled back at the warm, wet pleasure surrounding him. Blow jobs he could do. Eren was amazing at head. Giving head, getting head. He was definitely skilled. Bobbing his head, Eren kept his hand just above the root as he tongued at his slit, jerking him hard and fast, Levi's hips moving in time with the movements. He wasn't going to last, and if they hadn't both been effected by his rut, there was no way he would have been standing there, fucking Eren's perfect mouth in the public bathroom  
"Eren, I'm going to come. Drink it all down, omega. It's all for you, baby"  
Nodding, Eren hollowed his cheeks, releasing his hand in order to take as much of Levi as he could into his mouth. Rolling his hips, each thrust grew harder, mewing around the intrusion, Eren's hooded eyes sent him over the edge. Slamming into Eren's mouth, he shuddered as he came in long hard bursts, Eren swallowing down everything he could, until it became too much. Pulling back, his omega closed his eyes, trusting Levi to come across his face, rather than down his shirt. The alpha barely kept from popping a knot, and his hands on management of his "problem" had meant there wasn't as much as usual for Eren to deal with, not like when he knotted his mate, or how it would be full rut. Snatching out a handful of paper towel from the dispenser on the wall, he mopped at the mess on Eren's face, as he milked the last few drops from his still hard and throbbing dick on to Eren's lips. The omega drinking them down. Cleaning Eren the best he could, he then tucked himself have into his underwear, before pulling Eren to his feet, and finding that his mate had come from sucking him off. 

A wrecked Eren with his pants around his ankles was hot as hell... 

"So good for me, beautiful boy. So good for your alpha"  
Eren purred under his praise, letting Levi lift him off his feet and over, onto the toilet. Sitting him down, he tugged Eren's half on underwear down, cleaning up his mate the best he could, after he realised Eren still hadn't peed, and giving him a moment to do so. His mate's pupils were blown wide with lust, the dopiest of smiles on Eren's lips as Levi wiped at his face with a wet paper towel. Levi's heart swelled with affection. This was his mate and no one else's. Fondly he paused, cupping Eren's cheek. His fiancée immediately nuzzling into the touch  
"Hanji's going to take one look at us and know what we did"  
"Mmm..."  
"And I'm going to get into the shit for letting you get so excited"  
"Mmmm..."  
"And you don't give two fucks, do you?"  
"Mhmm..."  
"I love you, Eren. But I need to ask, are you ok?"  
"Mhmm... I love you. I love you so much, Levi"  
"Eren..."  
"Just help me clean up. I want to go home and be in your arms"  
"Are you sure?"  
"I can smell your rut, it's easing off... I think it'll be ok. I mean... we both need to accept that I'm actually ok. And we're having twins"  
Levi echoed the sentiment breathily, as if shocked, yet what he felt was deep pride. Eren was incredible. Not one pup but two, he literally couldn't be prouder of his omega, even if he tried  
"Twins"  
"Two healthy pups..."  
Eren started getting teary, surging up to throw his arms around him. His scent thick with relief and joy... and arousal, but that was just a background thought in that moment  
"Yeah, Shitty Brat. Two more wonderful pups"  
"Levi, take me home"

Carrying Eren out the bathroom, Hanji was waiting. At least the they'd saved their moment of passion for the bathroom outside the ultrasound and x-ray department. She wasted no time glaring at him  
"Arm"  
"What?"  
Holding up a capped syringe, he growled at it involuntarily   
"Lee?"  
"It's fine Eren. It's an emergency suppressant, because someone let himself get worked up into a rut"  
"It's starting to settle..."  
Eren was adorable as he tried to back him up  
"Eren, I can't send you home with him while Levi is in a rut. I agree his scent has grown milder, but for your safety, it's better I give him the shot"  
"Levi wouldn't hurt me"  
"Not intentionally. But you're not supposed to be doing anything strenuous or having sex so soon after those tests and you know that. Now, Levi, give me your arm"  
Eren hid his face against Levi's shoulder, the fact he was piggybacking his omega made it hard to release his leg. He didn't want to let any part of Eren go. When he didn't move, Hanji did. Sliding the cap free and stabbing him in the arm, the whole thing over in a few seconds   
"It should begin to work immediately. If you don't come out of your rut by tonight, I'll give you another one. Both of you are coming home with me, where I can keep an eye on you"  
"What?! No. Hanji, Levi isn't going to do anything"  
"He may not intend to, but alphas can get rather mindless during a rut. Especially when this one was brought on by a deep worry for you. Like your heats long for comfort, this the same. Even if you've just been told everything looks good, it takes a while for the news to really kick in. We know how stubborn Levi is. Now, we're going back to my house. You've already treated everyone here to a vocal serenade that they didn't need"  
Eren let out a small whine, hiding his face... his mate's mouth may have been busy for most of that, but he hadn't exactly been silent for the first part. Oops  
"It's fine, Eren. I like the fact they all know you belong to me"  
"Lee! No... I didn't think..."  
"Then don't now. You're my omega and I'm proud of that"  
Eren huffed   
"I'm so embarrassed"  
"If you're embarrassed now, just wait until you see what I have planned later"  
He didn't have anything planned, but making Eren whine was so damn cute   
"What?! No... Levi... no more embarrassment. What is it?"  
"You'll have to wait and see"  
"Hanji! Tell him he can't embarrass me even more"  
Winking at Hanji, she replaced the cap on the syringe. Viren tugging at her scrubs as he wanted up   
"He is your alpha... I doubt he's going to listen to me"  
"Hanji!"  
"Nope. You're going to have to talk to Levi about this one"  
"Wait?! What? You know? No. Tell me"  
Lifting Viren up, she balanced him on her hip. Eren digging his chin into his shoulder   
"Levi. What's going on? Tell me"  
"Oh... A little bit of this. A little bit of that"  
Eren let out a sigh, his omega finally seeming to get it was joke thanks to Hanji's giggle   
"I forking hate both of you. Don't do that to me..."  
"I'm sorry, Honey. You're too cute not to tease"  
"I'm not cute. I'm manly"  
"Sure you are"'  
"Levi! Tell her I'm manly"  
"Eren is manly... Mostly"  
"Traitor!"  
"I love you just the way you are"  
"I'm surrounded by traitors. Viren, do you love mummy?"  
"Mummy silly"  
"I can't believe I love any of you. I want popcorn when we get home. And extra cuddles"  
Leaning back to kiss Eren's cheek, Levi then nodded  
"Your wish is my command"  
"Then onwards good steed. Your rider seeks the comfort of cushions and blankets"  
Raising an eyebrow, he failed at scowling. His alpha was agitated that Hanji was so close to his mate, but with his pup there, it was keeping itself in line. Besides, Eren was going to be ok. It was the best news they'd had in so long... his fears were still there, but he was allowing himself this moment of happiness, knowing things always got worse before they truly got better. With twins coming, there was a hell of a lot to prepare.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sigh. Can't do it. I couldn't just chuck in a time skip to Viren's third birthday. Nooo... I have to have Levi scheming

Levi's rut, or simmering rut was kind of nice. His alpha holding him close all day, letting Eren nap in his lap while they were at Hanji's. The pair of them trading affectionate kisses each time either of them felt like it, while Viren and Anna both looked at them in disgust. Hearing he and their pups were alright had sent him sky high, his body flooded with warmth and happiness that only grew each time he looked to Levi. His mate's rut was still affecting him when they finally headed up to bed for the night. His alpha pushing him down to the bed, before spending what felt like hours eating him out. Waves of pleasures blended together, his hands buried in Levi's hair as he barely contained his moans and mews. Bringing him to orgasm, Levi's lapped every drop of cum from his stomach, Eren giggling at Levi's animalistic behaviour. His giggles earning him a playful away from his mate, though Levi's own soft laughter made it impossible for him to take anything seriously. Crawling up the bed, he flipped his mate off, thinking that was the end of it. Levi growling as he climbed up behind, his mate peppering kisses against his skin as one hand came to tickle his side. Giggles turned to full blown laughter as he begged or mercy. He was still giggling as Levi mounted him from behind, both of them shushing each other, lest they face the wrath of an angry Hanji. The sex was soft and gentle, despite the tapering rut, Eren falling asleep with Levi still inside of him. Napping off and on, they reconfirmed their feelings of happiness, whispered words of love falling between soft pants and rustling sheets. When morning came, Levi cleaned him down thoroughly with his tongue, which was hot as fuck. His mate's rut may have been killed off by the heavy dose of suppressants, but what he had been through made him feel like the luckiest omega in the world.

 

*  
Left to sleep by Levi, Eren woke to four small hands on his face. On his left, Anna was staring right into his eyes, as Viren pushed at him, repeating "Mummy!". Still happy from the previous night, Eren wrapped his arms around both kids, kissing Anna's forehead, then pressing kisses to Viren's cheeks as he tried to push him off, smacking him squarely in the eye by accident. Ignoring the pain, and the watering, he kept a smile on his face  
"Uncle Eren!"  
"Good morning, you two. Did mummy send you to wake me?"  
Anna gave an exaggerated nod  
"You've been asleep forever Uncle Eren! Uncle Mike and Uncle Erwin are here! And Uncle Levi's hurt"  
That got his attention, goodbye happiness, hello panic   
"What do you mean he's hurt?"  
"He's got bruises on his neck, like you do Uncle Eren... mummy won't tell me anything"  
Bruises... Hickeys... oh, thank fuck  
"Uncle Levi's ok. So am I. Have you been playing with Viren?"  
Looking to his son, Viren nodded  
"Yep. But he doesn't want to play barbies. And he won't let me do his face all pretty"  
"That's because my little man is already pretty. Why don't you take him back downstairs? I need to have a shower"  
"But Uncle Eren, you've been asleep all day!! Mummy said I had to wait! I want to play"  
"And we will, I just need to take a shower because I'm all sweaty! And my breath... I think something died in my mouth"  
Exhaling loudly, the kids caught a waft of his breath. Anna pinching her nose  
"You're smelly!"  
"I told you. Now go take Viren back to Uncle Levi. And be careful on the stairs"  
"I will! Come on Viren!"  
Anna was so good with Viren. She did each and every stair one by one with him, telling him off he tried to take too big a step. Leading him away, his son waved at him in clear confusion. Probably wondering why they had to come all the way up, to now go back down.

Showered and dressed in sweats and a shirt from his stash in the spare room wardrobe, Eren had tried to look a little less fucked. Levi had practically marked every single spot along his neck, like a collar of ownership. Walking into the kitchen, Levi rose to great him. Leaving Hanji, Mike and Erwin at the dining table, with the kids already back watching cartoons  
"Hey, beautiful"  
Kissing Levi, Eren wrapped his arms around him  
"Hey, you. How'd you sleep?"  
"Not as good as you, you looked too peaceful to disturb"  
"I don't mind. I know you like to be up early"  
"Take a seat, I'll make you some lunch"

Stealing another kiss, Eren then padded softly over to the dining table, sinking down with 3 pairs of eyes on him  
"What?"  
Erwin said nothing, but he was smiling way too much. As was Hanji   
"You three are creeping me out"  
Mike laughed  
"Sorry, Eren. I hear congratulations are in order"  
Mike already knew anyway...  
"Yep. Twins..."  
Erwin looked to his husband, then to Hanji   
"You didn't tell me it was twins"  
"Because we know you can't keep your mouth closed"  
Eren snorted as Levi shot Erwin down. He might not have got to tell everyone his news his own way, but Erwin being clueless was nice  
"Two healthy pups... and a happy omega"  
Mike smiled warmly, ignoring Erwin's furrowed brow  
"That's great news. How have you been feeling? How's your depression been?"  
"Not great. I've been having nightmares and panic attacks. And my head's been all over the place. Just ask Levi and Hanji. Then there's morning sickness which can kindly piss off. You know. The usual fun things pregnancy brings. But today's been pretty good. Even if Viren hit me in the eye for too many kisses"  
"It has nothing to do with the fact you and Levi have more hickies than skin around your necks"  
"Well, there was that too"  
Hanji groaned   
"I told you two to behave. You're still recovering and I know the ultrasound was really positive, but there's still a chance of miscarriage"  
"You don't have to have sex to be intimate"  
Placing down a steaming mug of tea, and plate of toast, Levi dropped a kiss on his head as he sat next to him  
"Mhmm..."  
"Oh no, don't even try that mister. You two totally boned"  
Eren choked on air, Hanji wearing her best disapproving mum look. Wrapping his arm around him, Levi leaned around him  
"Leave him alone"  
"Where's the fun in that?"  
Hanji blew a kiss in Levi's direction, Levi growling in response. Shaking his head at both of them, Eren sighed at their shenanigans. His mood starting to waver over mentions of miscarriages  
"Will you two let me eat my breakfast in peace? Erwin, please tell me you're here to drag Levi back to work?"  
"He's on extended shift as of next week"  
That was good. Levi needed that  
"Don't worry, I can talk to my boss"  
"Levi. No. You're going back to work... Hanji, am I allowed to start dancing again?"  
"As long as you take it easy, and make sure you're keeping your fluids up, you can start again next month"  
"You do realise that only gives me two weeks before the wind up"  
"Would rather not dance at all?"  
Eren glared at Hanji   
"That's what I thought"  
Beside him, Levi released his hold. Eren confused as the sudden lack of contact. Did Levi not want him dancing? It was only for two weeks, and then he'd be 6 months come February when it started up again, and probably too pregnant to dance... or at least pole dance... he could ballroom dance in a tux while pregnant either. That was just weird  
"When's your wind up?"  
Straining to smile, Eren looked to Mike   
"December 11. It starts at 4pm, which is all the kids dance classes first. It's a giant Christmas party. Then I think the ballroom dancing is about 7, and 9ish for Pole Dancing"  
"Pole Dancing?"  
Mike somehow managed to make it sound like he'd never thought Eren could possibly have Pole danced in his life... which he knew the alpha knew all about. After all, he'd fucked his ankle up because of dancing on it   
"Weeeeeell. I was working as a stripper when I met Levi and Hanji... it's a great work out, and it's super fun"  
Crossing his arms, Levi growled at Mike  
"Get your mind off my mate"  
"No ones thinking of Eren like that. I was just asking. Do you have to buy tickets?"  
"Yep. But I've got one for Anna, Viren, Hanji and Levi. His was supposed to be surprise..."  
He'd asked Sasha to pick him up another ticket... he may have thought he'd be single by the time the wind up came around, and that Levi would have no interest in attending... But Levi didn't need to know that. He'd lied to Sasha anyway, saying he couldn't get babysitter for Viren, so he was covered if Levi asked her  
"You got me a ticket?"  
Fuck. Levi sounded surprised, adding the guilt he was feeling about leaving it so late   
"Yes... Wait, don't tell me you two want tickets too?"  
Mike looked to Erwin, Erwin looking slightly miffed. He didn't know why. Erwin was the one who couldn't keep it in his pants. He wasn't exactly sure what had happened with Eld... and he was hearing all this from Levi, who didn't give two shits  
"No, it's alright. I'm sure Levi or Hanji will be filming"  
"Nope. No filming or photos for the pole dancing. It's a mixed class with alphas, betas and omegas, so no one is allowed to take photos in case someone gets upset"  
"Levi would probably kill anyone taking photos of you"  
His alpha huffed, his scent conflicting to his words   
"I wouldn't kill them"  
"No, you'd just give them an extremely hands on talking too"  
"Ok. That's enough. No one is hurting anyone. This is exactly why there's no filming"  
Mike tried to lighten the mood, but fell flat   
"I suppose you dance for Levi anyway"  
"Actually, I don't... but I've got my routine planned. So it's too late to change that. If he's a good boy, he might get a preview"  
Though Levi would probably chuck the shits over him dancing in front of everyone. He knew he hated it... but dancing felt so good, and his mate had been ok with him dancing again, once he got over the initial surprise   
"I think you'd better give him that preview"  
Hanji giggled nervously. Levi's scent was starting to turn a tad too angry  
"You two just want to watch. I'm onto you"  
Placing his hand on Levi's his alpha tensed   
"Levi. Do you not want me dancing?"  
"No. No it's fine"  
It didn't sound very fine...   
"I can do the Ballroom only"  
"I said it's fine"  
Nervous, he pushed his chair away from the table. Levi didn't want him dancing... his anxieties made his breath hitch  
"Eren"  
"No..."  
"Eren, talk to me"  
Reaching towards him, Eren stepped back. Well aware that Hanji, Mike and Erwin were watching the exchange between him and Levi   
"I said I didn't mind"  
"Really? Because that's not how it sounds"  
"Well what do you want me to say then?"  
"The truth. If you don't want me dancing, just say it like that"  
Rising in her own spot, Hanji tried to calm him  
"Eren, I'm sure it's just lingering concern and possessiveness from Levi's minirut..."  
Probably. But that didn't make it hurt any less, or his racing mind slow  
"I don't want to talk about it. I'm going to check on the kids"  
"You haven't eaten"  
"I'm not hungry"  
"Eren, you need to eat"  
"I'm not hungry. Sorry, Hanji..."

Walking away from the table, Eren chewed his bottom lip. It was just dancing. It wasn't like he was stripping, and he wasn't giving lap dances. He'd stupidly thought Levi would support him, not get shitty over it. Sitting down on the sofa between the kids Viren climbed into his lap without prompting   
"Uncle Eren, are you ok?"  
Nodding at Anna, he moved Viren onto one thigh, so Anna could climb up on his other side. Be happy and smile for the kids... the kids didn't know his past or what he'd done. They loved him for who he was to them, in the here and now  
"Yep. I sure am Anna Bee-nena"  
"It's banana, Uncle Eren"  
"It sure is. You're so smart"  
Settling herself down, Eren hugged both kids. At least the kids liked him. There they went... No. There he went. Having one good night and thinking things were better with Levi   
"What are we watching?"  
"'toons. Can we go play outside?"  
"It's a bit cold for that"  
"But you said!"  
"I know I did. I didn't realise how cold it was"  
"It's not that cold"  
Pouting at him, Anna was adorable and not taking no  
"Viren's younger than you sweetheart, he's not quite as strong as you yet"  
"He's so small"  
"That's because he's still growing"  
"I want him to be bigger. Then we could play more"  
"One say he's going to be taller than you"  
"But Uncle Levi is really, really short"  
Eren struggled not to laugh. Levi would be pissed to hear that  
"He's still taller than you. Viren, what do you want to do?"  
"Play!"  
"See, Uncle Eren. He wants to play"  
Tickling Viren's tummy, his son giggled. He loved the sweet sound so much. He couldn't say no to his wide grey eyes and happy face  
"Fiiiiiine. Go ask your mummy. You're going to need a jacket, and I need to put Viren in some warmer clothes"  
Anna gave him a wet kiss, scrambling out his lap to go running into the kitchen as she yelled for her mum, while Eren lifted Viren. Bopping him lightly on the nose, his son threw his arms up   
"Play! Mummy. Play!"  
"Yeah, baby boy. You need a jacket though"  
Firmly ignoring the direction of the dining area, Eren carried Viren upstairs, dressing his son in a thick warm jacket, and proper pants. He just had to play with the kids... that would make him feel better. At least he couldn't do that wrong.

"Eren"  
Waiting for him at the base of the stairs, Levi lifted Viren off his hip as his traitor of a son reached for Levi  
"Levi. I don't want to talk about it"  
"I was a dick. I know dancing is important to you"  
"And?"  
"And, I'm sorry. I know you love dancing, and I shouldn't have gotten mad over it"  
"Hah! I knew you were mad"  
"Ok. Yes. I don't like the idea of dancing in front of everyone else. But it's your body"  
"Even if I'm dancing in front of everyone, you're my alpha. You, Lee. Not them"  
Levi looked to his feet like a scolded child. His alpha wasn't great at always owning up to his jealousy. The words of love they'd whispered now seemed like lies   
"But they're all going to want you"  
"Want me? What am I? A hunk of meat? It doesn't matter to me what they feel or want. I'm pregnant with your pups"  
"It matters to me. You're gorgeous and out of my league. You could have the choice of any alpha you wanted"  
Eren scoffed   
"If you seriously think that, then what did last night mean? Does that mean I just settled for you? And that my feelings mean nothing?"  
"I'm not saying that"  
"Then have some trust in me"  
"I do trust you..."  
"But?"  
"But I don't want to share you"  
"I'm not a possession. I'm your omega. You keep saying I'm your partner. And dancing makes me feel better about myself. For fork's sake. I started dancing again to look good when I'm with you... and you know what, if you're jealous, than that's your problem. If you're that worried, then don't bother coming"  
"Eren"  
"No. You can't say you trust me, and not want me to dance. That's like saying I think you're cheating on me every you leave the house"  
"I'm not cheating on you! I'm worried for you!"  
Cheating wasn't the quite phrase to use... not when they'd dissolved into an argument not even two weeks ago over it  
"I'm not having this fight. I'm going to play with the kids, at least I can do that right"  
"God. Why are you being like this? I was trying to apologise"  
"Apology accepted. But I don't want to talk to you about it right now. Last night meant a lot to me... and now you're making me feel ashamed for liking the things I like"  
And stupid. Really stupid, for liking to dance  
"That wasn't my intention"  
"Then maybe you should have thought about this more. You're my mate. My alpha. I'm not dancing to attract another mate. This is why I never should have told you I was dancing again"  
Levi sighed  
"Eren. I want to support you, but if things were different and I was dancing, would you be jealous?"  
Yes... Levi was his mate, but if it made him happy, he'd find a way to deal with it   
"Yes. But I'd support you because that's what a good mate does when it involves something they love. Give me Viren, Anna's probably waiting as it is"  
"Anna's got the others under her thumb. Erwin's pushing her on the swing while Hanji and Mike had been instructed to watch"  
"She's a force of her own"  
"That she is..."  
Taking Viren back, Eren "nommed" at his cheek. Pushing down his emotions for his son  
"Let's play! Do you want to go on the swings? How does that sound?"  
"Swings! Mum. Daddy?"  
"Daddy's coming outside too. Do you want daddy to push you?"  
Viren nodded enthusiastically.

 

Throwing himself on the ground, Viren wailed. Anna was on the swing he wanted to use, and his son wasn't having it, even if he was too small for a normal seat. Leaving him wailing, Eren sat on the veranda, next to Hanji, to watch and wait it out. He was on the grass with nothing that could hurt him around him. Levi was stupidly attempting to soothe their screaming toddler. He hated seeing him cry, but mid tantrum... well, it was better to let himself cry himself out  
"Did you talk to Levi?"  
"Really, Hanji?"  
"He was pretty upset with himself"  
"He should be"  
"Eren, he loves you"  
"He might love me, but he didn't need to make me like shit"  
"He didn't mean to"  
"That doesn't change anything"  
"I think you're overreacting"  
"He's the one overreacting. I'm just dancing. That all there is to it"  
"Dancing and showing off that fantastic body of yours, while pregnant. It's like catnip for alphas. He loves you"  
"I know he does. But he needs to back off. He can't keep getting jealous like this. And he can't keep shoving his love on me. He went for weeks without tell me he loved me, and now I feel smothered. Last night was really good, but now I feel stupid. I love him, and I know he's anxious over trying work things out. It's... Hanji, he gets upset over something as simple as leaving me home alone for work..."  
"Eren, he's been going out of his mind worrying about you and the pups. He even went into a rut over it. He was still in a rut this morning, and I had to give him another dose of suppressants because he didn't want to hurt you, or exhaust you. He kept the kids busy all morning so you could rest. You know he's got his own issues"  
"He didn't tell me that"  
"Because he insisted you sleep all day, then you promptly had a fight with him"  
"I didn't want to have a fight with him"  
"Look. I told him if it bothers him, he doesn't have to come"  
"You weren't going to invite him in the first place, were you?"  
"No. I thought I'd he wanted to break up with me, and break our bond"  
Hanji should know all about that. She knew how upset he'd been, and how sure he'd been that it was over between them  
"You two are so fucking frustrating"  
"Now you sound like Levi. He's always calling me a stubborn shit"  
"You are. And so is he. I'm not letting either of you leave until you sort this out"  
"You can't do that. Levi needs time to cool down"  
"Yes I can, and watch me. Levi! Eren says he's sorry!"  
He wasn't sorry. Maybe a tiny part of him was, but a bigger part was in a state of shock, while him omega felt like their mate would yell at them the first chance he had. He hissed the woman's name furiously   
"Hanji!"  
Levi abandoned trying to pull Viren off the ground  
"If he's sorry, what do I do about Viren?!"  
Stupid Hanji. He was still working things out in his head. He didn't want to open his mouth. He didn't want to further Levi's disappointment in him. Looking to Hanji, she nodded at him to say something   
"Let him cry it out!"  
"What?!"  
"He said to "let him cry it out!"!"  
"But he's crying!"  
"Over the swing! Seriously, he'll stop if you stop giving him attention"  
Levi didn't seem to sure, but as he walked away from Viren, Viren continued to cry. Standing at the base of the steps, Levi kept his eyes on their screaming son  
"Are you sure I'm supposed to leave him be?"  
"He's crying over a swing, Levi. He'll be fine. Anyway. Eren is going to dance and you're going to watch. Ok? Good"  
His alpha frowned, Eren shrinking back as his gaze turned to him  
"You talked to Hanji about this? But not me"  
Holding up his hands, he shook his head  
"I didn't talk to Hanji. She shoved her opinions on me"  
"That sounds about right. I didn't mean to make you feel bad, especially after last night. It's not easy to stop worrying about you"  
"You don't need to worry so much. We literally got the best news yesterday. And you're going back to work. And, I've been dancing off and on for years. It's what make me happy"  
Cautiously, he lowered his hands. Levi wasn't yelling... and he didn't appear to be preparing to  
"I know it is. I'm happy your dancing makes you happy. You won't be... What are you wearing?"  
So that was the issue? Levi didn't want him looking like a slut on the stage  
"I'm covered, and I've worn less on stage before. Besides there are going to be kids in the audience"  
"So more than underwear?"  
If it was a costume issue, they could have talked about what he was going to wear... he'd let his alpha help dress him if it helped with Levi's anxieties and worries  
"Yes, Levi. More than just my underwear. It'll be a little skimpy, but everything will be covered"  
"I guess it's ok then... But how covered is covered?"  
"More covered than last night"  
"There wasn't much covered last night"  
"Exactly. Look, I have a few ideas, but my junk will be covered"  
"And your stomach?"  
"It depends how much I'm showing. I don't want to wear anything too loose"  
"See. Eren knows what he's doing. Now, Viren's birthday party is coming up. Did you want to have a combined baby shower?"  
"Levi. Make her stop. There's only so much I can take"  
"Hanji, leave him alone"  
"But cake?"

 

*  
Hanji was keen on a having the baby shower at the same time as Viren's birthday party. Levi could understand why Eren was so against it. It was their son's birthday party, and he didn't want to take away from it. Eren ended up losing his temper at her, which he secretly enjoyed as it meant his omega was no longer mad at him. He wanted Eren to dance, yet somehow his mind hadn't put two and two together when it came to what his omega would wear.

Driving home that night, Viren's birthday party was all he could think about. That and his tantrum.. and his own tantrum of sorts. Eren was dripping with pregnancy pheromones, his body slowly changing as he grew all that sweeter. Luckily Viren was asleep by the time they got to their apartment, giving him a little more space to thing. Eren putting Viren in his bed, while Levi sank down on the sofa. His phone in his hand as he tried to think what a good present for a three year old would be. Eren kept saying he was a good father, but today he'd felt over his head. Coming to join him on the sofa, Eren patted the space between them as he summoned Titan up to join them  
"Are you still mad about me dancing?"  
Eren's voice was small, but in the silent apartment, he may as well have been yelling   
"No. Not with you. I really didn't mean to make you feel bad"  
"Why didn't you tell me about still being in a rut?"  
Shitty Hanji and her shitty mouth  
"Because I wanted you to rest"  
"Is that all?"  
Leaning back, he looked to Eren   
"What else could there be?"  
"I thought that maybe you regretted last night? Because my body is changing again"  
"What? No. No. Last night was amazing. I don't regret it. I didn't hurt you, did I?"  
"No. You were very gentle, and having all your attention was nice"  
"Good. You looked so tired when you fell asleep that I was worried"  
"I'm fine... I didn't mean to make a scene in front of Erwin and Mike"  
"I shouldn't have pushed... but it hurt to feel like you didn't trust me"  
"I do trust you. It's everything else that's been happening. You first wanting to leave. You thinking I didn't love you. You losing the pup and then finding the other two are growing strong. I may have been slightly out of my depth"  
"You're not the only one. I mean. Things were so nice last night, then I ruined it by starting a fight. Then I started feeling stupid over thinking everything could be ok from just one night"  
"You're not stupid"  
"I felt pretty stupid today"  
"That was my fault. And you're not the only one. I don't know how you deal with Viren's tantrums"  
"I realised the more attention I gave him, the longer they went on for. The first few had me in tears, but I talked to Hanji and Marco"  
"I felt stupid not knowing what to do. I don't even know what to buy my son for his birthday"  
He'd bought him a new red blanket last year, and a stuffed teddy that the boy had begged for when they were out   
"I've already bought presents. They're in my room"  
"But I should know what to buy him..."  
"How could you? You're always so busy at work, and every time you two have gone shopping, you always splurge on what he wants. The trick is to wait to buy it"  
"I want to get him something nice"  
"Then get him something for when he's older, and... actually... he wants a bike. A tricycle would work, for when he's at Hanji's and at the park"  
"Doesn't he have one?"  
"He has a plastic one. If you can get a red one, I think you'll be the best dad ever"  
"How do you know he wants a bike?"  
"Anna's getting one for Christmas. He was there for the discussion and the choosing"  
"You know him so well"  
"I do spend most of my time with him. Make sure you get him a red helmet too. Everything has to be red"  
"It really does. What about his birthday cake?"  
"He wants a super hero cake, and he wants a cake made out of chicken nuggets"  
"Nuggets?"  
"Yep. Don't worry, he's going to get a whole tray of nuggets, as well as a cake"  
Levi would never understand the love of chicken nuggets   
"Are Mina and Anka coming?"  
"As far as I know. It's not going to be a massive party, but it will be at Hanji's. She's got the space"  
"I still feel like I should get him something more"  
"Levi, you've given him the best present he could ever have and that's you"  
Lifting Titan into his lap, Eren nuzzled the tom's face   
"I wish I knew when Titan's birthday was"  
"You want to celebrate his birthday?"  
"Why not? He's our other son"  
"He's a cat"  
"He's more than a cat. And Santi Paws got him a few nice things this year, didn't he?"  
"Do I want to ask?"  
"Probably not. I think I'm going to take a bath. What about you?"  
"I have a trike to find"  
"Yep. And don't you dare force us to go biking either. If I learned to ride one, I have no memory of it"  
"I'm pretty sure there are photos of you learning to ride a bike"  
Or there would be, if he knew where Eren had stashed their collection of photos  
"Are there? I don't remember"  
"Like I said, I'm pretty sure"  
Giving Titan another kiss, Eren placed him down between them  
"Don't stay up too late. You need to get back into a routine before work"  
"Anyone would think you're happy to have me gone"  
"No. This has all been nice, but I miss normalcy. I need normal"  
"You better get all the normal you can in. We've got twins coming"  
"I know. We're going to need to convert my room. Viren would probably want it, but with twins they need the space. Our little apartment is getting full"  
"We could move"  
Watching Eren, his mate paled, his facial expression akin to something of terror   
"I was joking. We'll figure something out. Go have a bath"  
"I.. yeah..."  
Eren backtracked to make sure the door was locked before heading into the bathroom. His omega clearly didn't want to leave... yet there was only so much space in their apartment, and no space for bikes and trikes. When did Viren get so big he could ride a trike? And soon it would be a bike. Their son had so much energy, there was no stopping him when he wanted to run. When he first realised he could run, the little boy had provided endless entertainment as he ran around the apartment naked after "escaping" from his bath, squealing and clapping as he ran from Eren with the towel. Half the time he was sure Eren let him run around because he knew how funny Levi found it. Shit. His life had been passing him by and he really hadn't realised until his wake up call with Eren. They should have been wed long ago. Instead of looking up a red trike for Viren, Levi started ring shopping. Eren deserved a fat wedding ring on his finger, as much as Viren deserved a red trike. No. His omega deserved it even more.

When Eren didn't reemerge from the bathroom, and Levi had settled on a ring, the alpha discarded his phone on the sofa. Heading into the bathroom, he found his omega sleeping in the bath. This time he was actually sleeping, his snoring soft as one hand rested on his belly. Smiling softly, Levi reached into the tub and pulled the plug out, before snatching up Eren's towel from the rack. Whining as the water level dropped, his mate nuzzled into the side of the bath  
"Eren, it's time to get up"  
Not getting a reply, Levi waited until most of the water was gone from the tub before sitting Eren up  
"What?"  
"You fell asleep in the bath. Here, hold onto me"  
Looping his arms around over Levi's shoulders, Eren let himself be lifted from the tub and into the towel, before Levi lifted him completely into his hold. Nuzzling at his neck, Eren let out a soft sigh   
"Thanks"  
"You're welcome"

Drying his still sleepy mate down, Levi fetched him a pair of sweats, barely getting them onto Eren before Eren was pulling him down and into their bed  
"I need to clean the bathroom up"  
"Leave it"  
"I can't just leave it"  
"If the bath is drained, it's ok. I want cuddles"  
"Can I at least get changed first?"  
"Mmm. I suppose so"  
Changing simply involved stripping down to his underwear. He wanted to shower, but clingy Eren was adorable. Sliding under the covers to join his mate, Eren moved to rest his head against his chest, as his hand found Levi's and intertwined their fingers  
"Love you, Lee. Thanks for taking care of me"  
"I love you too"  
"Good. 'cause I'm sorry for fighting with you"  
Sleep slurred Eren's words, his omega drifting off as Levi placed his free hand on Eren's hip, and before he could come up with his own apology. Despite the bedside lamp being on, the living room light being on, and the bathroom light being on, sleep snuck up on him. Falling asleep with Eren firmly in his hold.

 

Waking the next morning, Levi immediately growled at the loss of Eren in their bed. Climbing from it, his back cracked as his muscles protested having spent so long in one position. Growing old sucked. Flicking the bedside lamp off, he wandered out their bedroom. Viren was sitting on the sofa, while Eren was in the kitchen. Making a beeline for his mate, he wrapped his arms around him, nuzzling and kissing Eren's shoulder. Turning, Eren kissed the side of his head   
"Hey. I thought you needed the sleep given that you let me sleep in yesterday"  
"You could have woken me"  
"It's fine. A touch of morning sickness, then Viren decided to join me... unfortunately you're going to need a new phone"  
Levi's stomach dropped  
"A new phone?"  
"He dropped it in the toilet while I was puking. I washed it, and it's in rice now, but I have no idea if that will save it"  
He'd found the perfect ring for his mate... but stupidly he hadn't saved any details. They were on his phone... he hadn't needed to save anything... because they were on his phone...  
"Levi?"  
"Huh?"  
"You ok? You smell angry. I think he was trying to get me help, because I told him not to get daddy"  
"It's a little inconvenient, but we'll see what the rice does"  
"Hopefully it works. I'll buy you a new one if it doesn't"  
"No. I've got the money for a phone"  
"It was my fault. I didn't know your phone was out here"  
"Eren, it was bound to happen again. This isn't the first phone he's killed. But what about you? Morning sickness?"  
"Yeah. It was my own fault. Last pregnancy was eggs, but these two don't seem to like the smell of coffee or chocolate. I wanted to make pancakes"  
"Is that why we're having eggs for breakfast?"  
"Yeah. I hope you don't mind"  
"It's fine. I can take over"  
"No. You go take a shower. They should be done by the time you get out"  
"Are you sure?"  
"I've got it under control"  
"Ok... I was hoping we could talk today"  
"I'm not going anywhere today"  
"Good. Because I was thinking..."  
There was a cluttering from the living room, both of them turning to see Viren had dropped his spoon on his way to bring his dishes to Eren   
"You were thinking?"  
His moment of bravery to ask about the wedding passed   
"I was just thinking we should organise your next ultrasound appointment and to see Krista"  
"They're on my to do list. I need to message my dance partner too, and let her know I can start dancing again next month"  
"Her?"  
"Sasha. I told you about her. She's married to Connie, and eats like there's no tomorrow"  
"I don't remember"  
"It's ok. It's just dance stuff"  
"Do you think you could teach me?"  
"I don't know. I mean, I like my toes"  
"Rude"  
Taking the bowl from Viren, Levi placed it in the sink  
"I guess I'll take that shower then"  
"Yep. And can you drop Viren back off onto the sofa? The last thing we need is burnt fingers"  
"On it. Up we go buddy!"  
Viren wasn't happy as Levi placed him down on the sofa, the boy felt warm  
"Eren, does he have a fever?"  
"He was a little warm. I've got some children's panadol in the fridge for him"  
"I'll get it"  
"Ok. It's in the fridge door. We'll probably need a bucket too, just in case"  
"Yep"

Sick and angry, or angry because he was sick, Viren didn't want to take the panadol from him. The kid wailing like Levi was actually hurting him. Coming to the rescue, Eren had a sippy cup of juice   
"Here, give me the plunger"  
Passing it over, his mate depressed the contents into the small container built into the lid of the cup. Popping the lid on properly, Eren handed it over to him  
"Sometimes he's good and he'll take it, but sometimes you just have marvel at the wonders of modern parenting"  
"Does this mean I should buy one for you? I know how much you hate medication"  
"Ha. Ha. No. It means you should get that bucket, then go shower"  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes. This isn't his first fever. Once the panadol kicks in, he'll start feeling better and want cuddles"  
"Alright..."  
Again. He was amazed by how smoothly Eren handled things. He knew his mate was a great mother, but he felt stupid for not thinking of the sippy cup.

20 minutes and a shave later, Levi came out the bathroom feeling human. Eren had Viren in his lap at the dining table, his eggs and tea already waiting for him. Kissing both tops of their heads, he paused   
"How is he?"  
"He wants all the cuddles. He'll probably go down for a nap soon"  
His son didn't look happy at all. He was chewing on some toast, but glaring at it as he did. Taking his seat, Levi broached the topic on his mind   
"I was thinking I want to talk about the wedding"  
Eren dropped his fork in shock, hastily recovering it  
"The wedding?"  
"Yeah. I mean. I want it to be perfect"  
"You've been thinking about it?"  
"Yeah... I have no idea how to do any of the stuff that needs to be done, but I want to work it out"  
Readjusting his hold on Viren, Eren's voice was even to the point of dismissal   
"It's simple. I don't want to get married"  
What?! Hold up?! What!? That made no sense  
"You don't want to get married?"  
"At least not for a while yet. You can't marry a fat bride"  
"You're pregnant"  
"Exactly. And if Hanji has her way, she'll have me in a dress"  
"You don't want to wear a dress?"  
He expected Eren would want to wear some big fairytale dress  
"I'm a guy. I want to wear a suit, which wouldn't look all that good on me when I'm swollen with your pups"  
"So you want to wait? Until after the pups are born?"  
"And then we need to wait until their old enough for us to leave them with Hanji. Unless you don't want a honeymoon"  
"Hold up. I thought you wanted to get married?"  
"I've got to put the kids first..."  
So. What? Why? He didn't get it  
"It's fine, Levi. You don't need to force yourself. I know you hate attention, and the last thing you'd want is a big white wedding filled with lilies and silver trim. Besides, I don't know who'd we'd even invite"  
Shocked, Levi stammered out   
"But I want to marry you"  
"It's going to have to wait. Now we know these two are ok, we need to start planning for them"  
Eren. Who'd been so focused on getting married... didn't want to?! What? He'd basically begged for a wedding in Paradis. He'd wanted to be legally his. Not that he wasn't already in almost each and every way he could be  
"But..."  
"Levi. It's ok. Eat your breakfast"  
No. It was most certainly not ok. He'd summoned up his courage while showering, shaved and trimmed his hair to make sure he looked good for Eren, and now Eren was saying no?!  
"I thought you wanted to get married. You said you wanted to get married"  
"I do. I really, really do. But there's way too much to plan. There's Hanji's IVF, which I'll be out all day for on Monday. There's Viren's birthday. My dance wind up. Your birthday. Christmas. New Year's. Anna's Birthday. My Birthday. The birth of the pups. The sleepless nights. The breast feeding and nappies. Rearranging my old room for the twins. And everything else in between"  
"When you put it like that, it feels like it's never going to happen"  
"That's why I don't get my hopes up anymore. Life is busy, you can't change that. I'm done with breakfast. My stomach isn't loving this. I'm going to sit Viren down on the sofa and he'll probably want cuddles. Go ahead and finish up"  
That was it?! No. That wasn't it. If he swallowed his pride and went to Hanji, they could figure something out. Eren deserved the big white wedding, and he wanted it sooner rather than later... He'd found the right ring. It wasn't supposed to be like this! No. He wasn't going to accept this...


	10. Chapter 10

Levi was having a shit day at work. He was out in the field, biting his tongue about his plans to marry Eren as Erwin prattled on, asking after Eren and his mental health. He knew Erwin was concerned, but he'd already been thrown up on, and had one patient try to take a swing at him. Eren had said he was proud that Levi was out in the field helping people, but on days like this, it was hard to feel appreciated. At least the patient they were currently transporting to hospital was an old beta woman who was happy enough talking to through the gap. Hearing the radio crackle, he sighed as Petra's voice came through   
"Levi? Are you on channel?"  
She may have backed off on her continued perusal of him, but sometimes she'd revert back to hitting on him, making them all uncomfortable. She'd kind of edged to the fringe of their friends. Snatching up the receiver, Erwin looked to him  
"Go ahead Petra"  
"Eren's at Shinganshima hospital. He's not hurt, but he did sound pretty shaken up"  
Levi grabbed the receiver from Erwin   
"What do you mean he's there?!"  
"He called in an assault, Mike called me to see if I could warn you"  
"He called in an assault?"  
"I don't know much more, only that he's there... and that he's ok. He's not the victim"  
Erwin took the receiver back  
"Thanks, Petra. We're completing a patient transfer at the moment, we will be there shortly"  
"You're welcome. Mike also said to tell Levi that there's nothing wrong with the twins, and that he'd know what that means"  
That was something... but this whole thing was something he didn't need. Not on such a crappy day like today. He knew Eren could throw down with the best of them, but his mate has said he was going into the dance studio to catch up with his partner. Levi had no idea how that turned into assault  
"He does. Thank you, Petra"

Erwin didn't dare talk for the first few moments, as Levi gripped the steering wheel so hard it hurt his hands   
"He's ok"  
"He wasn't the victim. That doesn't mean he's ok"  
"If something was wrong, Mike would have said"  
"Eren probably told him not to. We both know he likes to hide things"  
"He's gotten better though, hasn't he?"  
"No. Not really. No. That isn't fair. It's still deeply ingrained in him that he has to hide things to protect us"  
"Where's Viren?"  
"With Eren"  
That meant their son would have seen whatever Eren had... Shit...  
"Levi, we don't know what happened. We're ten minutes out"  
"You don't seem to get it at all. Eren. He cares for everyone. He was actually upset over the people his father killed. He took on that pain like it was his to carry. He's not fragile, but he tries so hard to make everyone around him happy. He'd even cry if something happened to you and your shitty eyebrows"  
"I know he's a good kid"  
"But?"  
"But he is rather emotional"  
"You try being tortured and kept chained up, and see how you like it. He's still discriminated against for being an omega"  
"That isn't as bad at once was"  
"If you believe that, you're a fucking idiot"  
"Omegas were segregated to keep them safe. They were treasures for looking at and never touching"  
"And whores for the rich, when their heats hit. We all know the shit that's been smeared over the truth"  
"Levi"  
"Look I don't care if you don't like Eren. Actually, no. I do. I know you two have butted heads, but he is my mate. You should at least respect that"  
"I didn't say I didn't like him"  
"That's why you've been hounding me nonstop about his mental state. You want to know the truth? Going on his medication has messed with all his systems. He's barely an acceptable weight, and he has a whole new heap of triggers that set off panic attacks. His nightmares have returned, my nightmares have returned. He also thought I was cheating on him, and wanted to break our bond because I started treating him like shit without knowing it. He lost a pup down in Paradis, that's why Hanji came down to join us, and he's so worried about everyone around him, he's hiding his pain over it all. He's brave and he's stubborn, and he's my hope. He gets twice as much shit for being a male omega, and he still stands up for himself. He's not all panic attacks and crying fits. So you need to start respecting him"  
"I didn't say I didn't respect him"  
"No. I know you too well. You've always thought he was bad for me"  
"Not bad. You just have a tendency to lose all control when it comes to him. He nearly destroyed you. More than once"  
"Being taken against his will, then forced to witness the inside of a baby farm was hardly his idea of a pleasant holiday"  
"There were quite a few high ranking officials that fell thanks to Floch's investigation"  
"And thanks to Eren"  
Erwin sensed his defeat, the alpha turning his attention to the beta woman in the back, Levi seriously wanted to deck the man. They'd had this argument more times than he could count. He wasn't the same person he'd been since meeting Eren, and talking to Krista had pulled up so many thoughts and emotions. He knew he struggled with his anxieties over Eren, but anxieties and worry came hand in hand with loving someone. He couldn't help it if Eren deserved the moon and every star in the sky. He loved him and he loved loving him. Even when things were rough, Eren soothed his soul like nothing else.

 

*  
Completing the hand off, the beta woman smiled happily as she was wheeled away. Levi had made it a point not to look in Erwin's direction as he filled out the last of the forms. He had more important things to do. Get the forms done, then get the truth of everything out of Eren. Coming closer, Levi growled at Erwin. The man stopping just short of placing his hand on his shoulder. He didn't want to drag this up again. He didn't even want to invite Erwin to his wedding. That had been bad enough. He'd headed down to the courthouse to see about getting their marriage licence thing. The things they'd wanted on Eren's behalf had pissed him off. Eren was treated like a criminal. They wanted absolutely everything, including bank records and police clearance. Why the fuck their finances where any of the governments business, he had no clue. He'd thought it would be a simple case of presenting their ID's, but no. He'd had to take a small tree down, only for them to say each page needed to be signed by an authorised signatory. Which Mike could do, when he had time to talk to him without Erwin around. He was still yet to pick Eren's ring up... His phone hadn't survived its swim, which was probably why Eren had had to tell Mike everything. He hadn't had a chance to swing by the shops and pick up a new one... stupidly forgetting he could pick one up online when shopping for Viren. Though, in his defence, work had kicked his arse. He'd been dead on his feet when he came back on Monday night, then Viren had cried almost all night, his exhaustion had bled over into each following day since then. It was now Saturday and it felt like a whole month had passed since he returned. He'd been pampered into laziness by domestic life.

 

Heading into the emergency department, he didn't know the woman working. Explaining that his mate had been brought in, and that needed to talk to Mike, he was made to wait in the reception area, where everyone was sniffling and sharing their shitty germs... Eren loathed hospitals, and wouldn't be happy to be there. Then there was Viren. He'd been so upset when Eren collapsed, if he witness what happened, the poor boy would probably just as distraught.

When Mike finally appeared, Levi earned himself glares crossing the room before all of them. Slipping past Mike, his friend patted his shoulder, much like how Erwin had tried to before, leading him forward, he couldn't seem to find Eren's scent in the air  
"Eren's ok. Split lip and split knuckles, but he and the pups are otherwise ok"  
"Then what the fuck happened?"  
"He was having a late lunch with his dance partner Sasha, when he heard a cry. Leaving Viren with her, he found an omega in the middle of being assaulted"  
"Sexually?"  
"No. Though that didn't stop the beta from doing a number on their back and shoulders. Eren broke his arm, and jaw. Called emergency services for the omega and has been with her since they arrived"  
"He's really good with other omegas"  
"Her partner is on his way in. She'd come into the city for Christmas shopping, and was on her way to meet up with friends..."  
"Your shitty husband was just trying to tell me today how much better things were for omegas. What a load of shit. Even refuges don't give two fucks about the omegas in their care"  
"Just try not to let that anger show. She's pretty shaken up"  
"I know better than to do that. Have the police taken their statements"  
"It was your friend Pixis"  
Pixis barely ventured out his precinct these days. Things must have been desperate with the silly season upon them. Knocking lightly on the door to a room just off the emergency department, Mike opened the door slowly. Eren was sitting in the visitors chair, while Viren was bragging about all sorts of things to a very exhausted looking omega. The moment her eyes met his, she flinched away. Eren was there right away, hushing her softly  
"It's ok. This is my mate, Levi"  
"I trust you not to hurt her, but if she grows distressed, come find me"  
He'd planned to get Eren and go home, but of course his mate wanted to be there for the omega. Time to appear non threatening   
"Hey. Hey, Eren"  
"Hello, it's nice to meet you Levi"  
He noted the way the female omega didn't offer her name, and the slight tremor remaining in her frame. Moving to sit on the edge of the woman's bed, Eren wrapped an arm around her shoulders  
"You're perfectly safe here. I know all the doctors way too well, and if anyone does anything, Levi will jump in to protect us"  
"I'm not sure you need protecting. I'm so sorry you had to..."  
"No. I'm sorry you had to experience something like that"  
"You were honestly amazing. You didn't even hesitate"  
"Of course not. No one deserves to be made to feel that scared"  
Lifting Viren into his hold, Levi sank down into the visitors chair  
"How was work?"  
"Long. Erwin talks way too much"  
Eren snorted, then paused to explain  
"Erwin is married to Mike, the doctor who was there when you were admitted. He and Levi are paramedics"  
"Oh..."  
The woman frowned at the word paramedics   
"Who drove you in?"  
"I don't know. I think they were EMT's..."  
So Eren didn't know them   
"I did try to call you, then I remembered the whole phone thing. I'm guessing Mike called Erwin?"  
"Mike called Petra, who radioed through to us"  
"Ahhh... I did tell him not to. With you working, and me not being hurt"  
"Eren, you're a terrible liar. You've got steri-strips on your face and a wrapped hand"  
"It's fine. He didn't even hit my stomach, so it's nothing much. I've had worse from Viren. But we'll be talking about this when we get home. Levi might look all grumpy, but he worries way too much"  
The female omega forced a smile in his direction   
"That must be nice"  
"It is in its own way. Levi actually treats me like I'm his equal"  
"I can see why. I've never seen an omega hit a beta, or an alpha"  
"Sometimes it's the only way they listen..."  
"It was my fault, for being an omega"  
"It is not your fault. You cannot help being an omega. That beta could help being a douche"  
"I still feel responsible..."  
"I know. But I swear it wasn't your fault. You did nothing to deserve that"  
Nuzzling her hair, Eren held her close, gently calming her. Levi was strangely not jealous over the intimate contact. He was proud of his mate for standing up for what he believed in, and helping someone who could help themselves. The woman was absolutely tiny, he doubted she would be any taller than 5ft. Eren must have seemed like a 6 foot tall knight rushing to her rescue   
"Eren is right. You didn't deserve that. No one does. I'm so proud of you Eren"  
"You're truly not angry with him?"  
"No. How could I be?"  
"He hurt the beta"  
"If Eren hurt him, it was because it was necessary. He isn't one to jump into a fight and cause havoc just because he can"  
Eren blushed, flustered as he tried to get his words out  
"Besides, it's not the first time I've been in a fight. It, uh... it used to be semi regular. I mean, I didn't start them, but I wasn't about to let other people get hurt..."  
"What he means is, he used to work somewhere not so great, so regularly stood up for his coworkers"  
"That's so amazing for an omega. Usually no one listens. My alpha's nice, but there are so many out there that aren't"  
"That's true"

Falling into silence, it was awkward. When Viren tugged his arm and less that softly told him he had to go to the toilet, Levi took the chance. With a look to Eren, his omega nodded  
"I'm going to stay with her until her alpha arrives. You probably need to get back to work"  
"It's fine. I'm just taking a long lunch, I want to drop you home before going back"  
"If you need to go..."  
The woman's frightened expression said it all  
"No. It's fine. Like I said, I know all the doctors around here. I can get a lift home"  
Not that he'd ask. His brat would hate to inconvenience them  
"And like I said, I'll take you home. I'll be back soon"

 

Viren was more distracted by everything going on around them the fact he had to pee. The boy was so hyped up by everything, he ended up peeing on the toilet rather than in. Another thing Levi really didn't feel like dealing with, yet still wiped down the toilet, because he was nice like that. The whole trip had already taken longer than expected, with his son saying hello to everyone both there and on the way back. Eren was waiting patiently just down the hall from the omegas room  
"Everything ok?"  
"Yep. Her alpha's just arrived. And even though I've been here way too many times, I decided it would be smarter to wait here for you"  
"Thank you... after today, I probably would have lost it if I couldn't find you"  
"That good?"  
"Pretty much. Want to tell me what happened?"  
Taking his hand with his bandaged hand, Eren tugged him towards the exit  
"Ugh. Not if it means it's going to start a fight"  
"It's not going to start a fight. I just want to make sure you're ok... given what you witnessed"  
"I was having lunch with Sasha. There's this great cafe down from the studio, when I thought I could hear someone crying out. We were sitting out in the patio area. Sasha didn't seem to notice it, and no one else seemed to either, or they were ignoring it. Then it started getting louder, so I left Viren with her. They were both busy eating anyway. I probably looked like an idiot. Anyways, she was pinned up against the side of the restaurant, trying to get free and everyone was ignoring her. The police brought the alpha in separately, though the EMT's didn't seem too happy about us both being omegas, and having Viren there"  
So it didn't progress into a sexual assault... thank god for that. For both Eren and the omega  
"Not everyone. You did really good today"  
Eren gave him a shy smile, his mate still looking worried  
"Thanks. I wasn't sure if you'd be mad or not?"  
"I'm mad at everyone who walked past"  
"She was terrified. She kept asking him to leave her alone. I might have over done it"  
"From what I've heard, he had it coming"  
Pulling him into a one armed hug, Levi smiled at his mate   
"I'm so fucking proud of you"  
"It... was really scary"  
"And you handled it so well. You stayed with her and kept her calm"  
"I just did what felt right... I thought you might be mad"  
"No. I know how much omegas enjoy the contact of another omega, and how calming it is for you. You and Marco used to cuddle quite a bit"  
"I don't know how to explain it. It's like, really soft. Like cuddling into your favourite blanket"  
"Oh. Do I have to be jealous, after all?"  
"No. Your cuddles are the best in the world"  
"Mmm. That's better. He really didn't hit your stomach?"  
"No. He called me a slut and went to go me. All I cared about was getting him off Sophie"  
"Her name was Sophie?"  
"Yeah. I told her you might come by, so she wouldn't be scared. Viren was busy telling her all about you"  
Levi laughed, squeezing his son's hand as they made their way over to the door that would lead them out to the emergency department waiting room  
"I thought he was talking about himself"  
"He started by getting excited when I said "dad" and it snowballed from there"  
"Is that so?"  
"Yep. Anyway. Mike gave me an ultrasound to make sure I hadn't been hit, because I didn't remember getting hit in the face. No concussion either. I decked him in the face, and the idiot fell over his own feet. That's when he broke his arm"  
"Idiot"  
"Pretty much"

Erwin was waiting for them in the waiting room, Viren yelling out of "Uncle Erwin", freeing himself to run over to the man. Levi was still pissed over their earlier spat. Tensing, Eren saw right through him  
"Did you two have a fight?"  
"Yeah, but it's fine"  
"Levi. You don't have that many friends. You can't fight with the ones you do have"  
"He was just worried about you getting into a fight"  
"Oh. Yeah. I don't think he and I will ever be the best of friends, but I'm ok with that. We both care about you so much, that we both think we know best"  
"I know"  
He wasn't about to tell Eren about the contents of the conversation. Not when his mate was still shaken over what he'd seen and how he'd acted. He could smell both Eren's fear and Sophie's lingering fear.

"Everything alright?"  
Eren nodded, kissing Levi's cheek as he did. Erwin had Viren up in his hold, the four of them moving towards where the ambulance was parked  
"More than ok. Eren was extremely brave today"  
"Leeeee. It wasn't that brave"  
"He saved an omega from being attacked in public. I'm very proud of him"  
"And everything alright with you, Eren?"  
"Yep. Just fine. Both pups are fine, and the omega is with her alpha. It's just a few scrapes"  
"Mike said you were calm and collected, and kept her calm. Even though you broke the alpha's jaw and arm"  
"He broke his own arm. He tripped over his own feet. And, he was a beta"  
Mumbling, Eren was acting slightly skittish around Erwin. He didn't like that at all. Nuzzling Eren's back, his omega relaxed into his hold  
"I'm proud of you"  
"I know. You can stop saying it"  
"Nope"  
"Lee, please. I just want to go home now. I want to take a bath, and watch cartoons with Viren"  
"I think we can manage that"  
"Good. Oh, shit. I need to message Sasha. I ditched her at the cafe"  
"Am I going to meet Sasha?"  
"Yep. I invited her and Connie to Viren's birthday party"  
And Levi had remembered to look up trikes online, it was being delivered to Hanji's, along with a shiny red helmet for their son  
"I think they're really going to like Marco and Jean"  
"So they're coming?"  
"They're moving at the end of the month. Jean wants another pup soon, but Marco isn't having it"  
"He shouldn't have to"  
"He loves Jean, and he loves being a mum. Oh. He doesn't know I'm pregnant yet. Hanji's been warned that she's not to turn it into a baby shower"  
"I know. As far as I know, she doesn't have anything planned"  
"You know Hanji, she always has the best of intentions"  
"I know..."

 

Guiding Eren into the back of the ambulance, his omega kept an arm around his waist as they sat on the gurney. Viren immediately wanted to play with everything as Erwin stood him up just inside the doorway, while Eren was happy to hide his face against Levi's neck. Taking his son's hand, Levi pulled him up into his lap, sandwiched between his two loves. Closing the door, Erwin headed around to climb up into the driver's seat. Looking back at them, Erwin shrugged at the sight   
"You three ready?"  
"Yeah. Viren wants to play with everything"  
"You're cleaning the mess up"  
"Don't I always?"

 

*  
Dropping them at home, Eren was more than happy to be back in his safe place. He felt bad for inconveniencing Levi, and bad for bossing the EMT's around. They were going to take them to another smaller, closer hospital, but Sophie was terrified, and he didn't trust anyone else to handle the scared woman. Letting Viren go running to the sofa, Eren made sure the door was locked, about to text Levi over it, before remembering his phone was dead. He'd had enough of not being able to message his alpha. Like today, he couldn't even message Levi to let him know he was going to lunch with Sasha. He knew Levi wouldn't mind, but he felt the need to keep his mate in the loop given Levi's anxieties. They had a combined appointment with Krista, but that wasn't until after his dance wind up.

Exhausted, he wanted to take a bath, but that meant leaving Viren unsupervised. His son would probably crash soon from all the excitement of the day, and a nap did sound great... scooping his son up, Eren nuzzled into his soft hair   
"Mummy?"  
"Come take a nap with mummy"  
"Noooo"  
"Viren, don't you want cuddles?"  
"Nooo. I want cartoons"  
"We'll watch cartoons later baby"  
"But mum!"  
"Please Viren, mummy has had a long day"  
A very long day. His nerves shattered now that he was ok to not be ok. He'd also been dancing with Sasha, and hiding that from Levi. It was hardly anything. Merely walking through the steps of the routine they would be performing, yet he still felt guilty. Hanji had told him to hold off until the start of December, which was only a few more days away... He'd have to tell Levi. Levi would be disappointed, but maybe he would understand. It wasn't as intense as pole dancing  
"Come on baby"  
"I want daddy"  
"Daddy has to work with Uncle Erwin"  
"But I want daddy"  
That was when the crying started. Carrying Viren through to their room, he sat him down, only for the boy to fling himself down on the floor, screaming as he dissolved into a tantrum. Instead of letting him cry, he attempted to lift his son, who squarely hit him in his split lip. Jerking back in pain, Eren finally broke down. Starting to cry, he stumbled back, sinking down on the floor sobbing. He'd seen red at Sophie being attacked. Everything has rushed back from when Zeke died, and he'd lost it. He was sure he'd called the man "Bertholdt", as he'd decked him thoughtlessly. Everything was a kind of blur, he'd even scared Viren when he came back bleeding. His son didn't know why mummy was bleeding again, but he didn't like it.

Sitting on the floor with his back against Levi's wardrobe, he cried into his hands until two small hands grabbed his. His first instinct was to lash out, until his omega scolded him that it was their son. Gathering Viren into his lap, he rocked the boy. Viren crying just as hard as he did. He loved his son so much, but he hadn't thought about how badly he'd be scared by blood. Sasha had calmed him as they'd waited for the police and the ambulance to arrive, Viren didn't want to go near him at all. Kissing his son hair, he reminded himself he couldn't be like this. He was being selfish by crying in front of his son  
"I'm sorry baby. Mummy's sorry. Mummy's sorry. I know you want daddy. I know baby boy"  
Curled into each other, Eren kept rocking Viren until he fell asleep in his arms. Moving his son to his own bed, the omega then ran himself a shower, rather than a bath. With a towel shoved against the bottom of the door, so Viren wouldn't hear, he sobbed himself out. He hadn't even thought about the safety of his pups, and he was so fucking angry at himself for still being haunted by the past. 

When Levi got home from work, his mate seemed to know he really wasn't ok with a single glance. Striding over to him, Levi pulled him up from the sofa and into his arms. Eren crumbling against him  
"Bad day?"  
Eren snorted, nodding as he nosed at Levi's scent. His mate smelt as happy as he felt   
"Yeah. You?"  
"Absolutely crap"  
"Fuck... I'm sorry. When I got home, everything hit me. Viren was crying, and I was crying. But what happened with the rest of your shift?"  
"People are idiots. How do you feel now?"  
"Really fucking drained. I made dinner"  
"Thank you. Have you eaten?"  
"Not yet. I wanted to have dinner with you"  
"Sounds good. Let me take a shower, then we can cuddle on the sofa"  
"That sounds so good..."  
Neither of them moved, Levi laughing softly when it became apparent neither of them particularly wanted to  
"Levi. I need to tell you something"  
"What's up?"  
"I kind of danced today. Sasha and I walked through the moves to our routine. I'm sorry"  
"Eren, it's ok. I had the feeling you might, and you know not to push yourself just yet. Did you feel guilty all day because of it?"  
Eren nodded softly   
"I know you don't want to yet"  
"You don't need to feel guilty. We've both had a long day"  
"I'm sorry"  
"No, it's ok. Erwin made me pick up a new phone on the way home"  
"I was going to look them up, but..."  
"You fell apart. I can smell it"  
"I called the guy "Bertholdt""  
Levi tensed, sighing as he did  
"Alright. You're coming with me"  
"What?"  
"I need a shower, and we both need a hug"  
"You do kind of smell"  
"I got vomited on during the first call out of the day, then pissed on with the last"  
"And you let me hug you"  
"Don't say I never do anything romantic"  
"You're an arse"  
"Mhmm. Come on"

Levi was cooperative as they showered. Eren washing his fiancées hair, while Levi kept his forehead against his chest. He loved the grey hairs blending through Levi's neatly trimmed hair. His alpha was just as gorgeous to him as he was the moment Eren had met him. Trading a few small kisses, all their touches were reassuring, with no need to be sexual. He wasn't up for sex. Not after what had happened earlier. When their shower was done, Levi redressed his hand for him, kissing the wound sites and nuzzling into the spots, before disinfecting them.

After their shower, they curled up on the sofa. Levi fitting nicely in his hold as they ate, it was a comfortable sort of silence, the TV playing something on the background, that neither of them was paying attention to. Sleepy and warm, he placed his half eaten food on the table, content with holding Levi. He knew his mate hadn't been sleeping well. Forcing himself not to fall asleep until Levi did.

They managed a few hours sleep before he woke screaming. Levi sent flying to the floor as he started flailing. Climbing up, his alpha grabbed his shoulders  
"Eren?!"  
"I'm ok. Fuck... I'm ok"  
His chest was heaving as beads of sweat rolled down his face. Rubbing his eyes, Levi hovered until he was ready to sit up. Levi was a sexy kind of disoriented, sitting on the coffee table across from. His hair sticking up, with dried drool in the corner of his mouth   
"What was it about?"  
"It wasn't as bad as normal"  
"It was bad enough for you to scream"  
"It was weird... you killed Erwin, but he came back. And he had this rubber duck, and was chasing us. I don't really remember the rest, but it was weird"  
Levi laughed. His alpha threw his head back and laughed. Pouting, he pulled his hands back from Levi's  
"I'm sorry. But a rubber duck?"  
"Shut up. I told you it wasn't as bad as normal"  
"I didn't realise rubber ducks were so scary"  
"You know what, I was worried about you. I take it all back"  
"You can't take it back"  
"Then I'll remember this. And when you least expect it, there will be ducks"  
"I'm looking forward to it. But you're really ok?"  
"I'm ok. I had a good cry earlier while Viren was napping. I guess I was still a bit anxious when I went to sleep or something"  
"Anxious over ducks"  
"No one gets anxious over ducks"  
"Come here you, I think we can still get a few more hours sleep"  
Still pouty at Levi, Eren pushed himself up, surprising Levi by lifting him off the table  
"What are you doing?"  
"Carrying you to bed"  
"You're the one who had the nightmare"  
"And you're the one who was a dick over ducks. This my revenge"  
"I thought it was revenge by ducks"  
"Oh, there will be a great duck reckoning"  
"Look at you using big words"  
"You can't blame that on me. You're the one who's taught me how to read and write"  
"I never thought it would come back to haunt me like this"  
"You need to set your phone up"  
"I know. Tomorrow after work, we'll sit down and work it out"  
"And we need to get you a waterproof case"  
"That would probably be a good idea. It needs to be toddler proof too"  
"I don't think anything that's supposed to be toddler proof is"  
"No... you might be right about that one"

Viren had crept into their room while they slept. The boy sleeping in the centre of the bed, out like a starfish. Sitting Levi down, his alpha smiled at their son  
"Should I move him back to his bed?"  
"No. You should sleep closer to him. Just in case I freak out again"  
"Eren, you don't need to be scared of Viren"  
"I freaked him out pretty badly, I didn't think about how scared he be over me bleeding"  
"Eren... it was all forgotten by the time we got to the hospital. He was happy"  
"I hate scaring him. When I started crying today, he was mid tantrum because he didn't want to nap. He climbed into my arms to make me feel better. He's not supposed to do that"  
"Let's go to bed. It's been a long day"  
"L-"  
"Eren, you're a great mum. And a great person. I meant what I said. I was so proud of you for stepping in"  
"I didn't even think about the safety of the pups"  
"Is that what's worrying you? The pups?"  
"I was so angry I forgot about them. It wasn't until Mike wanted to give me an examination that I remembered"  
"I think you're over thinking it. We've both had a long day"  
It was easy for Levi to say. He hadn't seen how scared their son was  
"Please Levi, just sleep next to him"  
"Alright, as long as you stay"  
He was planning on bolting back to his old room the first chance he got   
"Eren, stay. I want you to stay"  
He couldn't say no to that...  
"Even if you have another nightmare, I'll be here to protect you from the ducks"  
Fucking ducks. He should have kept his mouth shut. He was starting to feel anxious about it all... and stupid as fuck. Who the hell had a screaming nightmare over ducks?!  
"You're so annoying. Go to sleep already"  
"Then get into bed already"  
"I'm waiting on you"  
"And I'm waiting on you"  
"That's it. I'm going to go sleep in my room"  
"No. Ok. I won't tease you about it any longer, can you please just come to bed?"  
"You'll never mention it again"  
"Not unless you do"  
"Fine. Move over, I'm getting in"

Levi might have promised to never mention it again... but the moment Eren spooned up behind him, his alpha quacked. After that, his desire to fall back to sleep vanished. He stayed in bed with Levi in his arms, but he didn't dare sleep. He didn't want to feel even stupider than he was.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I finished this one earlier this morning, then started right on 12. Hence all thr stuff relating to 12 going up on tumblr

Eren had been off since his duck nightmare. His omega was shutting him out again, yet always seemed to have a valid excuse to. He'd been asleep on the Sunday, busy with Hanji, then busy with preparing for dance wind up. When he finally got a day off, the day before Viren's birthday, his mate had left the apartment before he woke, having been picked up by Hanji on her way home so he could clean up before the party. 

Driving himself over there, Eren was so busy with party preparation, Levi found himself on cleaning duty... Hanji's house the pigsty he remembered, other than the kitchen, living and dining area. Hanji was passed out from her shift, while Viren and Anna were making "decorations" at the kitchen table. Eren having provided them with an unending supply of pencils and paper. His son was as skilled as his omega when it came to sketching... completely awful.

By the time everything was done, there was a sea of food. The extras serving as dinner for the kids, while Eren refused to sit, due to the mountain of dishes. Chased out the kitchen by Hanji as she volunteered Levi for dish duty, Eren was forced to join kids in the living room. It wasn't even 10 minutes later than Anna came to report that "Uncle Eren had fallen asleep". Putting Eren to bed in the spare room, there was a small pile of presents for Viren in the corner, most of which were signed from both of them. His presents were in the car, figuring they'd be there for the afternoon, not staying the night. Making sure Eren was tucked in properly, he stole a quick kiss, leaving the door open so he could listen for any nightmares.

Heading back down to the dining room, Hanji had served up two plates of party food  
"How is he?"  
"Sleeping"  
"Soooo, that means we can talk now, right?"  
"About what?"  
"About Eren. What happened with you two, you were doing so well"  
"You noticed it too?"  
"I did. Now spill"  
"I don't know. He's been off since he had a nightmare"  
Levi nearly mentioned the ducks. It was on the tip of his tongue  
"Did he say what it was about?"  
"Yeah. It wasn't anything major, but he had a bit of scare. An omega was attacked by a beta, and he stepped into protect her"  
"I heard about that from Mike. He said he was really good with her"  
"He was. He thought I'd be mad, but I was proud of him. Everyone else was ignoring her, but he stepped in. He stopped something much worse from happening to her"  
"Honestly, it's tiring seeing how many omegas are abused and hurt. We had one in not that long ago, their partner beat them half to death because they went to a shelter during their heat"  
"I'm sick of seeing it. Even shelters don't help. Work just feels so pointless. Especially when you get called out to the same shitty address"  
"Erwin said you'd been distant"  
"Erwin says too much. Eren wants me out there helping omegas, but now days, I'd rather be home"  
"Maybe it's time you think about quitting for good"  
"I can't. Not when there's a wedding to plan, Christmas, New Year's, Eren's birthday, twins coming. It all takes money"  
"If you're not happy, then find a new job"  
"With a bullet in my back? I'm a fucking liability"  
"They never warned us about all these responsibilities that came with growing older"  
"No. And it's been hard. Eren pushing me away. I don't know why"  
"Maybe he's been stressing over this dance wind up. You two did make up over that, right?"  
"Yes, mum. We talked. I was a dick"  
"Damn. I wish I'd gotten that on record"  
Levi rolled his eyes, here he was, trying to have a serious conversation   
"Sorry. I was trying to lighten the mood. I know he wants tomorrow to go off perfectly"  
"Yeah. You better not have anything organised"  
"No. After he lost his temper at me, I didn't bother with any baby shower plans"  
"Good. He's not in a good place. I tried to talk to him about getting married and he straight up shot me down"  
"He did what?!"  
"Shhh. The last thing we need is little ears repeating this to Eren"  
"I'm sorry, but I can't believe it. He's had his heart on marrying you for so long"  
"I know. I was thinking maybe... we surprise him? He said he doesn't want me marrying a fat bride"  
"He's pregnant, besides, a dress will cover that"  
"He doesn't want to wear a dress. He wants to wear a suit"  
"But... I found the perfect dress for him"  
"I found the perfect ring, and I've applied for a license. You should have seen the paper work"  
"I don't think I want to. That's one good thing about alphas getting married, there really wasn't that much paperwork for us"  
Hanji shook her head, her face saddening. Probably because it would soon be her wedding anniversary   
"I didn't mean..."  
"No. No. It's ok. I know. I don't think springing a wedding on Eren would go over well"  
"Then what else am I supposed to do?"  
"Maybe leave hits around? Jewellery catalogs, and such?"  
"He'd probably go buy what he likes from them, without even telling me about it"  
Hanji pushed a smile to her lips, never missing the chance to give him shit  
"Like that box I'm hiding in the garage?"  
"That's his Christmas present"  
"Mhmm..."  
"It's a blanket I saw down in Paradis. It's very him"  
"I know. You really don't know what upset him?"  
"I know he's still struggling with his nightmares. He eats a proper meal most days, but he's been keeping busy, almost like he's intentionally ignoring me"  
"Have you two been intimate?"  
"Not like that. Cuddles and kisses in passing, on the chance I actually get to see him awake"  
"Hopefully it's something simple like him being distracted by Viren's birthday"  
"Yeah. I hope so..."  
It was nicer to believe that, than that they'd gone backwards again  
"I'm sure it'll be ok"  
"I just don't know what I've done. He had a rough day, we both did. We took a shower, fell asleep on the sofa. He had a nightmare, then we went to bed. Viren had crept in, and Eren was afraid of sleeping with in our bed. He said he'd scared Viren by bleeding, and again when he had a small breakdown..."  
"Is that it? He wants to make Viren's birthday special as an apology?"  
"I don't know. He's upset Viren with nightmares and panic attacks before. He still feels guilty over miscarrying in front of him..."  
"Then I guess we'll have to wait and see. Has he been to see Krista?"  
"We were supposed to go, but he had to change the appointment due to my schedule. We've got a joint appointment coming up next week..."  
"And he's got the results of the genetic test back?"  
"Oh, what? Yeah. That all seems to be in order. His next ultrasound's next month. Mike gave him one after the omega attack, and gave him the all clear. I thought you would have checked"  
"I'm not always stalking the pair of you, you know. I occasionally do my job"  
"That makes a first"  
"You're an arse"  
"I've been told that one so many times, I'm beginning to wonder if it's tattooed on my forehead"  
"Yep. It is. Nice big capital letters"

Picking at his plate of food, he had no real appetite. When Viren came running to him, his son was more interested in the food than he was. Letting the boy take what he wanted, he enjoyed hold him... even when he ended up covered in smeared mince from cold party pies. Viren was the best of both of them. Other than the tantrums. His son's wide eyed innocence was so similar to Eren's. his excitement of learning something new, lit his face up just like Eren's used to light up each time he learned a new word. He wanted to protect that forever. He wanted his son to grow up in a world where it didn't matter what your dynamic was, and he wanted the boy to know it was ok and perfectly acceptable to be an omega, and to be friends with an omega. Kissing Viren's hair, his son turned to give him a wet food filled kiss on the cheek. His disgust must have showed as Hanji cackled with laughter   
"You're just jealous"  
"No. I get more than enough of those kisses. Why don't you take him up and give him a bath?"  
"What are you going to do?"  
"I may find the energy to put the dishes in the dishwasher"  
He'd actually forgotten about those, his mind on Eren   
"You two cleaned my house, the least I can do is throw the dishes in the dishwasher"  
"If you didn't let it get so messy in the first place..."  
"Then what would Eren do when he came over?"  
"Relax. Like he's supposed to be doing?"  
"He relaxes"  
"He better. You're the one who said he needed to relax and heal"  
"Levi, today was the most wound up I've seen him in a while. Usually we sit and talk, or play with the kids"  
"He's so good with them"  
"He's come such a long way. Go on and head up for the night"  
"It's barely 6pm"  
"We're going to have a yard full of sugar filled kids tomorrow, you need all the rest can you get"

Eren wasn't in the spare room when Levi stuck his head in, with the light on in bathroom, there was a light jog in his step as he headed down the hall. Something felt very off... and he could put his finger on it. Opening the bathroom floor, Eren was in the middle of a panic attack. Pills scattered around his mate as he sat on the floor, staring off into space with tears in his eyes  
"Hanji!"  
Startled by his cry, Viren struggled against him  
"Levi, what is it?"  
"Take Viren and head downstairs"  
Shielding Eren from her, Hanji took his unhappy son  
"What's going on?"  
"He's having a panic attack"  
"Ok. I've got the kids"  
Moving into the bathroom, Levi closed the door behind him. Grabbing the bottle off the floor, he quickly read the label. Ordinary panadol. From the dent in the side, it looked as if Eren had thrown the bottle against something  
"Eren?"  
Big doey eyes looked to him. Eren sniffling as he tried to wipe at his face  
"What happened?"  
"I couldn't get the stupid bottle open"  
Levi felt weak with relief. Eren hadn't taken anything. The pills scattered from throwing the bottle  
"What's wrong?"  
"I have a headache and I couldn't get the bottle open... Why do I have to be like this?! To stupid to open a simple fucking bottle?!"  
"You're not stupid"  
"I couldn't get it open!"  
"Ok. Alright, here. Can you get up for me?"  
"I don't think I can move"  
Moving Eren from the floor and up to the bathroom counter, he took his mate's face into his hands  
"Did you take any of them?"  
"No... I started crying"  
"Alright. Hold on"

Shaking out two small white pills, he pressed them into Eren's hand, his omega dry swallowing them before he could retrieve a glass of water for him. Looking to his feet, Eren seemed to shrink away from him   
"I'm sorry"  
"It's alight. I've thrown pills before"  
"I saw it on your face, you thought I'd taken them. Didn't you?"  
Levi winced in guilt   
"I knew it..."  
"I thought you might have had a panic attack not known you'd done it"  
"I was supposed to get better"  
"You are getting better"  
"I'm supposed to be better"  
"Eren, there's no time limit on recovery"  
"Really? Because it feels like I haven't recovered at all. Maybe keeping the pups was a bad idea... all I've been doing is fucking falling apart"  
"Hey. That's not true"  
"It is! The fact you thought I'd tried to overdose the day before our son's third birthday says it all"  
"Well that the fuck am I supposed to think? You've barely talked to me, or even looked at me since the day Sophie was attacked"  
"Because I've been busy"  
"Yeah. Avoiding me!"  
"So what if I have?!"  
Levi felt like he'd been stabbed in the heart. He'd known it!   
"I'm supposed to be your alpha"  
"And I'm fucked in the head! If I don't keep busy, I can't stop thinking!"  
"You could talk to me"  
"And tell you what!?"  
"What you're thinking... what you're feeling? What you're up to?"  
"What am I supposed to say? That without my pills I feel stupid and useless? That you made me feel stupid? That I was too embarrassed to say anything in front of you, because apparently I can tease you, but fall to pieces when you do it back?"  
"Yes. If it helps"  
"I can't! I'm tired of falling apart! I want to support you! I know you're not happy, and I have to keep it together for Viren"  
"You don't have to hide it from me..."  
"If I don't, you won't go to work. You'll want to stay home and take care of me. I can't take it. Ok. I feel smothered!"  
"I thought you liked it..."  
"I do! I did! But Levi, we've been drifting for months and now it's too much! We're only talking again because I'm pregnant... you know, Sophie wasn't the first omega I stood up for. I came home with a black eye once, you didn't even ask what happened. I'd forgotten all about it..."  
"What? When the hell did that happen?"  
"Before I found out I was pregnant"  
"Why didn't you say anything?"  
"Because you were busy with work..."  
"Work doesn't matter"  
"It matters to me"  
"Eren..."  
Starting to cry harder, Levi stepped forward, gathering Eren up against him  
"I'm sorry"  
"Levi... I feel like I'm going crazy"  
"You're not going crazy"  
"I am. You tell me so many things that should make me feel good about myself, but I'm none of them"  
"That's a load of shit"  
"It's true... I... I kicked Viren..."  
"What?!"  
His tone was more aggressive than he meant it to be. Eren wouldn't just go around kicking their son  
"I fell asleep on the sofa and he grabbed me by the ankle. I kicked out without thinking! I'm not a good mum! I hurt him"  
The way Eren whimpered at the end of his sentence broke his heart   
"Oh Eren... when did this happen?"  
"The day after the attack... he fell back and all I could think about was dad sending me flying across the kitchen when he killed mum... I shouldn't be a mother! I'm not a good mother! He was so confused, and he looked at me like I was a monster. I am a monster!"  
"Shhhh... it's ok. Is this why you've been working so hard to make sure everything was perfect for his birthday?"  
"We were getting closer. He actually wanted me, and he wanted cuddles... What if I do it again? What if I try to throw myself off the balcony again? Or pass out from a panic attack and he gets hurt?!"  
"No. Shhh. You're ok... I'm here"  
"Maybe I should get rid of the pups?"  
"No. No. We're going to get through this"  
"How? I feel like monster every time I look at him"  
"You are not a monster"  
"I am. I'm a freak"  
"You're not a freak"  
Whimpering, Eren's hand went to his head  
"You're ok. You're going to be ok"  
"I want him to be happy... I want him to grow up being happy. Not with a psychotic mother"  
"You're not psychotic, and you're not a bad mother. A bad mother wouldn't care if he was happy. He wouldn't try so hard to make sure his son never saw him crying, or to make sure he never saw us having an argument"  
"I love him so much Levi. I love him..."  
"I know you do. I know you do"  
Rubbing Eren's back, he wasn't sure what else to do. Eren didn't want him quitting work, but his mate really did need emotional support right now. They had savings, but they wouldn't last forever... As loathe as he was to admit it, maybe Hanji was right? Maybe he should look at trying to find a new a job? He hated that Eren felt so terrible, and that he was actually wondering if keeping their pups was the right thing to do. He knew his omega loved them, and his small swell  
"I love you, Eren"  
"I don't know why... anymore"  
"Because you're incredible"  
"An incredible failure"  
Pulling back to take Eren's face in his hands, he stared down into Eren's red eyes, wiping at his tears with the pads of his thumbs   
"You're smart. And funny. And witty. And you have the worst pick-up lines. You wear your heart on your sleeve and you stand up for everyone. You're kind, and gentle. All you want is for everyone you care about to be safe and happy, even when it causes you pain. You accepted me for who I am. For all my flaws and my shit sense of humour. You came into my life and turned everything upside down. You fixed the parts of me I didn't even know that needed fixing. And you did it with a smile on your face and your head held high. Like it was as natural as breathing. I'm even better at expressing what I'm feeling, and understanding those around me. I never realised how narrow and course my outlook on life was. You even accepted my obsessive cleaning ways, and my damaged hands"  
"Your hands are always so warm"  
"You listened about Farlan and Isabel. You understood how I felt, and you even loved them like you knew them, and like they were your family. You've given me a family, and somewhere to belong, and a wonderful son. You did all those things. Even when you were scared, you accepted me. Even when you were scared of your heats, and of the things you were feeling, you let me in. Even when I fucked it up, you forgave me"  
"I don't feel like I'm all that special"  
"You are. You're so very special to me. And to all of us"  
Eren sniffled   
"I feel like I'm always letting you down. I'm always ending up in hospital, or sick, or doing and saying the wrong thing. I feel stupid for not going to school, and stupid when you're all talking and I can't keep up"  
"Eren, you passed your high school equivalency while dealing with post-partum depression and the pressures of being a new mum. You're so much smarter than you think"  
"You... you did most of the work"  
"No. We worked on it together. All I did was check your work, after you'd tried your hardest"  
"I don't want to feel like this"  
"I know you don't. And if I could take all this pain from you, I would"  
"I wouldn't let you. You have so much to deal with. You're the brave on. You rush in and save people's lives"  
"So do you. You protected the omegas at the club, and the church grounds, and Sophie. And don't think I've forgotten about that time in the hardware store. Or with Marco, and with Hanji"  
"I get into fights. Omegas aren't supposed to"  
"Well. I think you're perfect, and I'm proud that you stand up for them. I don't give two shits about what omegas are and aren't supposed to do"  
"I know you don't. That's why you're so good with them, but society doesn't see it that way"  
"That's their loss. For each of us lucky enough to know what it's like to have the love and trust of the an omega, we wouldn't change any of you"  
"I would. If I could... I'd change"  
"What would you change?"  
"These stupid tears. The stupid voice in the back of my head"  
"Your omega had always been a bit of an arsehole"  
"More like a whiny bitch"  
Kissing Eren's forehead, Eren sniffled loudly   
"I love you, Levi. I don't mean to be like this"  
"I know"  
"I really hate crying"  
"I know you do"  
"And I'm sorry for dumping this on you"  
"You don't need to be sorry"  
"I do. Sometimes I need space, but I don't know how to ask. I don't want to hurt you anymore"  
"All you have to do is say so. It's ok. Sometimes I need some space too. You know that"  
"I don't feel like I have the right to ask"  
"Eren, you could literally ask me for anything. You're the only one in the world with that right"  
"Then can I ask you don't quit your job for me?"  
"I seem to remember you asking me that before"  
"I still feel like you need it"  
"I'm not so sure about that. I've been thinking it might be time to start a new career"  
"And do what?"  
"I don't know. Something"  
"Before you do, talk with Erwin. And Mike. And Hanji. And Eld. And Gunther... I don't want you to make a decision that you'll regret"  
"All you can do in life is make the choices you feel you'll regret the least when the time comes"  
"And what if you make the wrong ones?"  
"That's when you need to trust in those around you to back you up"  
"No matter what you choose, I'll back you up"  
"That's because we make a pretty impressive team"  
"Only because of you"  
"No. It's because we work with each other than we can overcome things"  
"You know. You really have changed. When I met you, you were trying so hard to keep everyone an arms length away. You were so determined to take everything on alone. You'd tell me at least once a week how you hated repeating yourself... I just hope I haven't broken you"  
"I'm not broken. I'm healing. I've been on this planet for nearly 40 years and it took you coming into my life for the healing to begin"  
"You'd think with friends for doctors, the healing would have started a whole lot sooner"  
"Our friends are arseholes"  
"But you love them"  
"Not as much as I love you. I'm sorry about the pills..."  
"No. I probably scared the fuck out of you. I couldn't get the stupid child safety cap off, and then I when I got it undone, I was too worked up to get the lid off"  
"Was it just the headache?"  
"I started panicking when I realised I'd fallen asleep and wasn't downstairs with the kids anymore. I haven't even done the dishes"  
"Hanji stacked the dishwasher"  
"The poor thing has been going all day"  
"I don't think you need to worry"  
"I need tomorrow to be perfect for him. I don't care if he won't remember, I want him to be happy"  
"And he will be. He loves the attention"  
"And he's going to love his trike"  
"Which his mother knew to tell his clueless father about"  
"You're not clueless. You get anxious. You're not sure if your gifts are good enough... but they are"  
"How did this turn back to me?"  
"Because I want you to know you're a good dad and a good alpha"  
"You're the one who's upset"  
"And you're the one who's dealing with me... God. I feel wrecked"  
"We should get you to bed then"  
"I still need to..."  
"Whatever it is, we can take care of it in the morning"  
"I was going to say I need to clean my face and do my teeth"  
"You weren't, but I'll let you off this time"  
"No... I wanted to have all decorations up for in the morning"  
"Then we'll wake up a little earlier than planned"  
"Levi, kids don't get the whole sleep in thing"  
"Then we'll be quite"  
"They have a 6th sense about their parents being awake"  
"You might be right about that. How about we try to get some sleep, and if we wake up, we'll do the decorticating then?"  
"You're not going to let me do it tonight, are you?"  
"No. Right now, you're burnt out and need to sleep"  
"Viren still needs a bath"  
"Which I can take care of"  
"I feel bad for not decorating tonight"  
"After everything you were doing in the kitchen today, I think you're entitled to taking a break"  
"Parents don't get breaks"  
"Fine. A breather. Let me handle some of this. We're his parents. The two of us"  
"I know... can you help me down?"

Getting Eren back into bed was easy. Having cried himself out, his omega let himself be put back into bed. At least he understood what was going on now. He knew how scared and confused Eren had been over his father's actions, but he wasn't his father. He needed to learn to forgive himself. He'd never meant to hurt Viren. His ankles were just a sore point for him. Even during sex, if he accidentally brushed against Eren's ankles, his omega would tense. He'd tried to lash affection on the lingering scarring, but Eren just wasn't comfortable with it. If it didn't involved being touched there, Levi would have suggested that Eren might want to get them tattooed, like his wrists. He had to admit the parlour did an wonderful job on Eren's wrists. He really hadn't understood how touchy Eren had been about them, but since having them done, his mate had gone back to wearing shirts and tops, and holding hands more often. If only all of Eren's self worth issues could be solved so easily...

 

*  
Eren had slept fitfully against him, his omega's scent sour with pain and distress. Holding him tightly, Levi had tried rubbing Eren's stomach to calm him, but all that had eventuated in was Eren slicking through his underwear, and Levi stuck masturbating at 4:30 in the morning like a dirty old man. It hadn't even felt nice. All he could think about was returning to the spare room and burying himself in his mate. Which he could have done anyway. When he'd returned to bed, Eren had climbed into his lap... and... well... he'd ridden him practically fucking himself on Levi's erection, until Levi had to come. It wasn't his fault that Eren was sexy as hell, even if the room was so dark he could barely see him... and even if he knew that sex was merely a distraction for his lover at the moment. Remaining firmly in his lap, Eren had cleaned them both down, then laying along Levi's chest, nosing at his chest with his cold nose, before falling asleep like none of it had even happened. He was whipped. So very whipped... but at least their quick, hard fuck had calmed Eren enough for him to sleep.

It was a little after 7:30 when Eren woke, this time his omega was soft and affectionate, thanking him for listening to him, and for putting up with him. Told not to move, Eren started off shyly, sitting up and spreading his legs, making one hell of a show of slowly riding him. Chanting his name, along with prayers of praise, his hands were slapped away as Eren got them both off again. His mate coming hard as he knotted him, before throwing himself down to nuzzle at Levi's neck as he purred furiously. He didn't realise what Eren had planned, growling as his omega's teeth sank into his neck, drawing another orgasm as he did. Responding in kind, Levi sank his own teeth into Eren's perfect neck, the omega still purring despite the remarking.

Unfortunately, their loved up morning didn't last. Once Levi's knot had deflated, he was dragged to the bathroom for a very quick shower, then found himself dried, dressed and decorating before he knew what had hit him. Eren was in full mum mode, and everything had to be perfect. Along the kitchen bench sat everything that need to be heated in the oven. Eren organising it into what could go in with what, and from what needed to be in there the longest to shortest. It was barely 8:30. They had 3 hours before anyone arrived. He didn't understand why Eren was pushing himself so hard already.

Then, once again, time passed in the blink of an eye. When it hit 9, Eren was off upstairs, returning with a wide away Viren. His son dressed in a new outfit with some cartoon super hero he wasn't even sure he knew on the front of his shirt  
"Happy birthday, baby boy!"  
"Daddy!"  
Bringing his son over to where Levi was attempting to inflate balloons, Eren passed Viren to him, nuzzling and kissing their son's hair  
"Time to make breakfast for my two a favourite men"  
"Viren, what do you want for breakfast?"  
"Daddy 'cakes!"  
"You want daddy to make pancakes?"  
"Daddy 'cakes!"  
Eren laughed softly   
"Baby, daddy..."  
"Daddy will make pancakes. It's not every day our son turns three. Is the stove top clear?"  
"Yep. Are you going to be ok handling breakfast?"  
"I'll be fine"  
"Ok. I'll bring his presents down, the take over on balloons. Anna wants to look like a princess today, so Hanji is going to sleep in with her, and let us have the morning"  
"When did you decide all this?"  
"When I was up dressing Viren"  
"I guess that's the plan then"

Eren was off again. Not as in personality off, but as in each time Levi turned to talk to him, his omega was off decorating. All of Viren's gifts now filled the end of the dining table, apart from the trike which sat outside on the veranda. The double doors were open, letting the crisp morning air in. They'd gotten lucky with the weather, it was cloudy, but no rain was forecast. For the third time that day, time slipped away from him. He made pancakes with Viren, Eren in and out the kitchen as he checked the oven. They did Viren's presents from them together, mostly blankets, clothes, and action figures. They both knew it kind of paled when compared to the trike, but their son was over the moon at all the attention he was receiving. Like the proud dad he was, he recorded all of it, taking turns to swap between him and Eren filming and holding Viren. Eren was all smiles for the camera, and scary as all fuck the moment it came to return to the kitchen. He was like an omega possessed. No one was allowed to mess with his system, then no one was allowed in the kitchen area at all once guests started arriving. Hanji finally bringing Anna down as Mike and Erwin made their appearance. Anna was dressed in her blue princess dress. Her hair smoothed back to perfection, before falling in ringlets from her ponytail. Shyly she rushed to give Viren a handmade card and a kiss on the cheek. The poor boy had no idea what to do with either of her gifts  
"Thank you, Anna. You look pretty"  
Anna giggled   
"Uncle Levi, you're supposed to say I look beautiful. I'm a princess!"  
"I'm sorry, little Lady Anna. You do"  
Anna nodded, all smiles as she did  
"Come on, Viren. Let's go play"  
Taking Viren's hand, Anna led him off to the living room.

"Where's the birthday boy going?"  
Carrying her gift for Viren, Hanji threw the comment over her shoulder as she placed the gift at the end of the table   
"Anna decreed it a royal duty to play"  
"You two did an awesome job. All of this looks great"  
It did. The whole theme for Viren's birthday was red and silver. Balloons and streamers were everywhere, and it was worth it to see the way his son's face lit up  
"It was mostly Eren"  
"Don't look at me. I'm in the kitchen"  
He didn't think his omega would be paying attention. He was now icing the cake he'd baked the previous day  
"Eren, it looks incredible. Do you need help?"  
"Don't you dare think of coming in here"  
Hanji raised an eyebrow  
"You're not the only one banned from the kitchen. We all are. He kicked me out before I could do the breakfast dishes"  
"That's because you were in the way. This cake isn't going to ice it's self!"  
Sitting in the dining chair closest, Hanji decided she needed to edge it even closer  
"You talked?"  
"Yeah. He's getting there"  
"Don't think I don't see that new mark"  
"That kind of happened. He accidentally kicked Viren and he's been devastated about it since"  
"What happened?"  
"Viren grabbed him by the ankle and he kicked out before his brain could catch up"  
"Noooo. My poor baby"  
"You're forgetting to tell her the best bit. Levi thought I tried to off myself last night"  
"I didn't think that. I panicked"  
He hadn't thought they were loud enough for Eren to hear, not with Mike and Erwin playing with the kids   
"I had a breakdown about not being able to get a bottle of panadol open, and split the pills everywhere. Anyway, stop being distracting and stop talking about me"  
"Sorry, Eren. It's only because I care"  
"I know you do. But it's not ok to talk about me like this"  
"I'm really sorry. How about I make it up to you? Do you need a taste tester?"  
"I will put you in time out if you keep interrupting"  
The threat seemed very real, Eren's voice significantly colder than it had been  
"Maybe we should go check on the kids?"  
"You go. I'm good here"  
"Levi. Go take photos. We've already got 5 kids without parental supervision"

Evicted to the living room, Levi retrieved Viren from Erwin's lap. Dropping down on the opposite sofa, he tickled his son's sides  
"Everything ok in there?"  
"Don't go in there if you value your life. Eren is in organiser mode"  
Mike rose an eyebrow at Hanji  
"He worked himself to the point of exhaustion yesterday"  
"So you were evicted?"  
"Levi was sent to watch us poor unsupervised kids... Oooh! Car door!"  
"Kids?"  
Hanji climbed back off the sofa, striding towards the door  
"Yeah. He doesn't trust the 5 unsupervised kids"  
"He's the youngest out of all of us"  
Erwin seemed a little butt hurt over the comment... or maybe Mike wasn't putting out... Either way, it wasn't the mood one wanted at a children's party. He could have checked that shitty attitude at the door.

"Guys! Mina and Anka are here!"  
Mina and Anka were both dressed in party dresses. Mina didn't seem to be having a good day, while Anka was unsteady on her feet as she came running at them  
"Happy Birthday, Viren!"  
Marco's smile seemed to brighten the whole place up, while Jean looked as if he had a carrot stuck up his arse. Leaving her father's side, Mina walked over to Anna  
"Come on in. Just don't go in the kitchen"  
"Eren's cooking?"  
"Eren's cooking. Hello Mina"  
Trying to talk to the girl, she was snubbed. Mina talking to Anna, before taking her hand and leading away   
"Sorry, she's been in a mood all morning. Anyway, we have gifts!"  
"On the dining table. There are drinks, but you have to brave Eren!"  
"There are drinks in the middle of the table! Stop talking shi-shoe about me Hanji!"  
"Stop listening then!"  
"Marco, you might be safest to approach"  
"It's safe to approach. It's just not safe to go into the kitchen. The girls just headed out the back, will they be alright?"  
Levi had forgotten Marco didn't know Eren was pregnant. His mate was wearing a black button up shirt, rolled up at the sleeves, with a pair of black jeans. His swell obvious to all but a blind man  
"Eren? Is there something you forgot to tell me?"  
"I... what?"  
Marco tapped his stomach  
"Oh! Oh! Yep. Twins!"  
Marco rushed to Eren, throwing his arms around him  
"Congratulations! How far along are you?!"  
"15 weeks"  
"Already?!"  
"Yep"  
"Wow. That's great news"  
"Thanks, Marco. Levi's super excited"  
"I bet he is"  
Shuffling awkwardly, Jean stalked through the house, muttering about checking on the girls. Levi didn't miss the fact Eren didn't say he was excited  
"Sooo, does this mean you'll be moving out the apartment?"  
"What? No. Why would we do that?"  
"Because you're about to have three small pups, and the apartment is tiny"  
Eren looked to him with fearful eyes  
"There are no plans to move. Eren, do you need help in the kitchen?"  
"No. No, I've got this. Marco, why don't sit and chat with the others"  
"Sure. But seriously, congratulations Eren"  
"Thank you"

Levi wasn't letting it lie. He didn't need Hanji's stare to know to check on Eren. Standing in the kitchen, Eren had his hands against the counter. Walking up beside him, he pulled his mate into a hug   
"Lee?"  
"You looked like you needed a hug"  
"Mmm. I did. I'm being an arsehole, but I promise once these mini-quiches come out the oven, I'll be out the kitchen"  
"Do you want help?"  
Covered plates lined the bench  
"Not just yet. Sasha and Connie aren't here yet"  
"Then can we stay like this a little longer?"  
"Yeah. This feels nice. This morning was nice too"  
"I wasn't expecting that"  
"I kind of got myself so worked up, that I needed..."  
"Some release. When I have a mate this beautiful, I don't mind if he wants to ride me"  
"You just love my stomach"  
Levi moved his hand to Eren's stomach, his omega sighing as if all his suspicions had been confirmed   
"I do. And the rest of you"  
"I'm still really sorry about last night. With the pills. I know what it must have looked like, but I think it's going to take me a little while to be ok with you panicking"  
"I'm sorry"  
"I'd rather you didn't talk about it"  
He nearly reminded Eren he was the one who'd brought it up, instead kissed his mate's temple  
"How's your head today?"  
"I've got a bit of a headache... but it doesn't matter"  
"I'll get you some panadol, and take a break. You've been on your feet all morning"  
"I told you, once the quiches come out"  
"And how long is that?"  
Eren looked over his shoulder  
"Another 10 minutes"  
"Alright. I'll grab you that panadol. Then you're going to come sit down, and you're going to let yourself relax. Anka and Viren playing with the cars Mike and Erwin got Viren"  
"Did you get photos?"  
"No. They already had them out when I joined them"  
"Stupid alphas"  
"Hey, I represent that implication"  
"No. You're the smartest alpha I know"  
"And you're the best mum I know. Everything looks perfect"  
"I couldn't have done it without you"  
"I don't know about that. Super mum to the rescue. I'll be right back"

 

Getting Eren out the kitchen, his mate was barely in his lap before he off again to answer the door. The two strangers he brought back with him could only have been Sasha and Connie. Erwin and Mike both went on guard at the entrance of two unknown alphas  
"Guys. This is Sasha and Connie. Sasha and is my dance partner is Connie is her husband. Sasha, Connie. This is Hanji, the one with the eyebrows is Erwin, the one with Anka on his lap is Mike. The one with the freckles is Marco, his partner Jean is out the back with Anna and Mina. You know Viren and the brooding one in the corner is my alpha, Levi"  
"Dasha!"  
Abandoning his toys, Viren ran to Sasha. Catching him and lifting him high, Sasha beamed at Viren   
"Hello, squirt! I hear it's happy food day!"  
Giggling, Sasha span Viren around, before setting him down again  
"Thanks for having us"  
"Thanks for coming. Now, I know you're worried about food, but there's plenty"  
"You know me too well"  
"I do. There are drinks on the table, but other than that, make yourselves at home"  
"I'm loving the red. It's making me want to..."  
"No. You're not changing your dress again"  
"The red and silver look soooo gooood!"  
"Connie, please tell her that she's not changing her dress again"  
Sasha pouted at her husband  
"I'm not getting in the middle of this one"  
"A wise man"  
Connie laughed at Erwin's comment. Coming to join them in the living room, it soon became clear that Connie was a joker. He had Anka in stitches within minutes by pulling funny faces at the girl. Eren finally returned to his lap, looking pretty happy as he did  
"So you're the infamous Levi?"  
Sasha was just like Hanji. Mischief was all over face   
"I am?"  
"Eren's told me a lot about you"  
"It's probably all true"  
"Oooh. I think I'm going to like you"  
"Levi's hard not to like"  
"I don't know, I was scared he was going to go me for dancing with you"  
"Levi knows better than to get in the way of my dancing. Don't you, Levi?"  
"Yes. I learned my lesson"  
"The hard way no doubt. He's a stickler for perfection"  
"He is"  
Eren smacked his shoulder  
"You don't need to agree so fast"  
"I'm not going to fight the truth"  
"Don't make me go back to the kitchen"  
"No. You're resting, now. Who are we still waiting on?"  
Hanji hummed   
"I did invite Petra, Nanaba, Rico, Eld and Gunther..."  
Erwin clapped his hands  
"Then we might as well go ahead and start"  
"Let Eren take a rest first. Why don't you put those eyebrows to use and grab Viren's presents off the table"  
Connie laughed like it was the funniest thing ever  
"Fine"  
Mike was left to follow his cranky husband. Hopefully he could get through to Erwin.

 

*  
After the cake and presents, the party moved outside. Viren had squealed and run on the spot when he'd seen his new trike. Eren filming as Levi placed him on it, so fucking proud of his son. His happiness so pure. Sitting on the veranda, Levi was supposed to be in charge of the music, but had been distracted by Sasha and Eren dancing. Eren was so happy, he and Sasha laughing as they did. They'd started off waltzing because Anna wanted to watch them dance, and now they were messing around as far as Levi could tell. Still, Eren was glowing and he was slightly jealous  
"You could ask him for a dance"  
Levi spluttered, before recovering   
"Was I that obvious?"  
"Only to me"  
"I can't ask him to dance. I can't dance like that"  
"I don't think he'd mind"  
"Well I do. I'm not making a fool of myself"  
"I think he'd really like to dance with you"  
"He's distracted with Sasha"  
"Go dance with him, or at least go talk with him"  
"He looks happy"  
"He'd look happier with you"  
"You're so annoying"  
"I know. Now off you go"

Walking over to Eren and Sasha, Levi tapped Eren's shoulder. His omega jumping as he did  
"Oh. Hey, Levi!"  
"Hey, sorry to interrupt. Can I borrow you for a minute?"  
"Sure. Sorry, Sasha"  
"It's fine. There's food calling my name"  
"There's always food calling your name"  
Taking Eren's hand, Levi led him back into the house. With everyone outside, he didn't need to worry about making a fool of himself   
"Levi? Are you ok?"  
"I want... I mean... I was wondering..."  
"You were wondering what?"  
"It's. Well. You looked happy dancing"  
"You want to dance?"  
Eren's face lit up   
"I don't know how..."  
"I don't mind. Here, come here"  
The song was wrong, but somehow Levi found himself slow dancing with Eren. Levi was grateful it wasn't hard to go wrong with slow dancing. Swaying against each other, and nuzzling at each other's neck, Eren kept letting out content sighs. It was nice. Eren relaxed against them as if they were the only two in the whole wide world. It seemed like the right time  
"Eren, I applied for a marriage licence"  
"Y-you did?"  
"I did. I'm so over waiting to marry you"  
"You know we can't"  
"Why not?"  
The next sigh Eren let out wasn't happy   
"Because there's so much going on. We should get back"  
"Hey..."  
"No. Ok. Not today"

Going to step away from them, there was the running of little feet. Anna and Mina came running in, Anna looked unhappy. Following them was Viren and Anka. Stopping in the doorway, Mina grabbed Anka's hand, pulling her away from Viren, before putting herself between her sister and the boy   
"Leave us alone! You're so annoying! We don't want to play with boys"  
Pushing Viren hard, Viren fell back, landing hard against the veranda decking as he did. Rushing from him, Eren threw himself down next to Viren  
"Viren!"  
The scream their son let out stopped everyone. It was pure pain. Gathering him up against him, Eren rocked their son as the world started moving again. Hanji coming to Viren's other side as Jean pushed through to grab Mina and Anka away as if they were the ones in pain   
"Eren? What happened?"  
"Mina pushed him"  
Jean snarled   
"Don't blame my daughter!"  
Viren was still screaming   
"Ok, let's get him up on the table so we can take a look" 

Sitting Viren on the table, Eren was crying softly. Their son's arm was grazed, as was a spot on his cheek. Levi had his hand on Viren's back, holding his son's left hand, as Mike examined the toddler. Hanji had her hands full with a crying Anna, who'd backed up Eren over Mina having pushed Viren. He was absolutely livid with Mina. She might not have anticipated Viren being hurt, but she had been forceful with her shove. Viren had never been mean to the little, and there was no reason for her to lash out like that. Viren had been happily riding around the backyard on his trike, and probably only followed the girls into the house out of curiosity   
"Nothing seems to be broken, little man. I'll grab my first aid kit, why don't you take him into the living room"  
"Grab the one from my bathroom, it's closer"   
Marco came to Eren's side, Eren jerking away from him as Marco placed his hand on his shoulder   
"Eren, I'm so sorry"  
"No... its not your fault"  
"We're going to take the girls home. Mina needs to learn this isn't ok"  
"That's probably for the best"  
"Let me know how he gets on?"  
"I'll message you later"  
"Levi..."  
The omega seemed scared of him... He wasn't a monster. He was just a worried dad  
"It's ok, Marco. Go ahead and head home. Don't forget the stuff in the fridge"  
Eren had set aside of plate and party food for them to take home  
"Thank you"  
It was clear Marco was embarrassed by his daughter's behaviour. Jean, however, was being an arse about it. Scoffing that Viren must have deserved it. His comment sent Eren so pale that Erwin pulled his head out his arse, moving a chair so he could sit. Staring down at his hands, Levi realised Eren had gotten blood on them from Viren's grazes  
"Hanji. Eren"  
Hanji took one look at Eren and got what he meant. Handing Anna to Erwin, Hanji wrapping her arm around him to guide him to the kitchen.  
"Eren, why don't you come wash your hands"

 

Mina screamed and screamed as Jean carried her out. Eren was shaking like a leaf as they cuddled on the sofa. Viren hadn't like having his arm and face dressed, while Anna sat across from them looking mournful. Sasha and Connie had excused themselves just after Marco, Jean, and the girls left. Eren had tried so hard to make everything perfect, and now his omega was beating himself up for not watching Viren. Until the incident with Mina, things had been perfect... or maybe he should say things had been perfect until he'd opened his mouth about getting married. Beside him, Eren's breathing started to hitch as he started crying all over again  
"I'm sorry, Uncle Eren!"  
"Anna, it's not your fault. Uncle Eren had a little scare"  
"I wanted to play with him, but Mina said no"  
"It's ok, princess. Eren, do you want to help me put Viren down for a nap?"  
Eren took the out, heading off and up the stairs before Levi had even finished moving Viren in his hold   
"It's alright, Anna. Uncle Eren is ok, so is Viren"  
"Mummy, I think I want to go bed too"  
It sucked for Anna too. She was such a good kid, where as Mina was the devil's spawn, for which he blamed Jean. Jean tended to leave all disciplining to Marco, leaving her to think it was ok to be naughty. 

Heading upstairs, Eren was in the spare room  
"Here we go, one little boy in need of cuddles"  
"He's really ok?"  
"Yeah. Just a little bruised and confused"  
"I wanted him to be happy"  
"He was, until Mina pushed him down"  
"It scared the fork out of me"  
"I know. Lay down, so I can settle him down"  
"I don't know if I can. I don't want to hurt him"  
"He's going to be ok, he's just sleepy from the panadol"  
And crying himself out. Eren wiped at his face, starting to crawl across the bed to settle down, ready to cuddle into their son   
"Ok... fuck... Why did she do it?"  
"She was probably jealous. None of us expected her to push him"  
Laying Viren in his left side, Levi carefully slipped his hand onto the toddlers tummy. Kissing Viren's hair, Eren pushed it back from their son's face  
"It was a good birthday party. He was so happy"  
"He was over the moon when you gave him his trike"  
"Yeah... Did... do you think he had a good morning?"  
"I think he had the best morning of his life. He loved the attention, and he really seems to like Sasha"  
"They bonded over their love of food. Sasha stole a nugget and Viren had the mother of all tantrums"  
"She seems nice"  
"Yeah. She's a good partner too. Easy to dance with"  
"I can't wait to see you dance"  
"I don't even know if I can... I feel exhausted"  
"Then take a nap"  
"I don't want to close my eyes in case something happens to him"  
"I'll be watching"  
"I can't believe she did that"  
"I know you can't. He didn't deserve it"  
"He's so small"  
Kissing Viren's forehead, Eren took Viren's hand into his as he rested his forehead against the boys  
"And he's so big at the same time"  
"He is... its scary. I can't believe how amazing he is"  
"I can. He's got a pretty amazing mum"  
"And an amazing dad. World's greatest Dad, I would say"  
"That cake would say otherwise"  
"Don't be surprised if you're crapping red for the next week"  
"More like the next year"  
Eren gave him a pained smile, but at least he was trying  
"Go to sleep. You need your rest"  
"You'll wake me if anything happens?"  
"I will"

Eren took a long time to fall asleep, while Viren only took minutes. The omega whispering to their son how much he loved him. They were both so precious and adorable. He couldn't imagine his life without them.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Sasha and Eren chapter 
> 
> Stupid me.
> 
>  
> 
> Me who finds Ballroom dancing but knows nothing about it.
> 
> Me. Who wasn't going to get drunk, drunk on Masala and Lemon vodka (not like drunk, but drunk enough for the word issues to be even more pronounced.
> 
> Me who has this scene planned fooooor a long time...
> 
> Enjoy the drunken writings of a weirdo

Leaving Eren sleeping, Levi was forced to drag himself to work, dropping a still sleepy Viren off at Hanji's on the way. Eren had to be at the function centre they were holding the wind up in at 10am, his mate springing on him that he was supposed to be helping with the set up, the previous night. Though he did insist that he'd told Levi, and it was written on the fridge calendar... not that'd he'd acknowledge it. Not until he realised he was upsetting Eren instead of his mate being able to take it as a joke. He didn't like the idea of his pregnant mate being on his feet all day, but there was nothing he could do about it. His shift started at 5am, and even showering at work would be cutting things fine. He was dressing up for Eren's sake, trying to make amends for his stupid spat of jealousy.

Thankfully he was on a split shift. His morning in the field, with the last few hours working with students completing their Paramedic degree. Most of that involved role-play, much to his disgust, but with Erwin still being in a shitty arse mood, it was actually preferable. If he was upset with him, he'd wish the man would just spit it out, and if he was upset with Mike, he wished the two of them would just bone it out... It was tiring, and beginning to affect patient care. Erwin had dropped the ball at an accident, nearly costing the victim their life. He didn't want to write Erwin up, but he also didn't know how to ask him what the fuck was going on with him. He wasn't sure he wanted to know, and he definitely didn't want to fight with Erwin over Eren again. 

The last half an hour of his shift was the worse. He was so close to seeing Eren, yet his students were shitty idiots. He'd somehow managed to catch the eye of two young female betas, that insisted on bombarding him with pointless questions. What kind of moron didn't know that you didn't put butter on a burn because it seals the heat in. Even burn creams didn't compare to fresh cool running water. And then... just as he'd thought he was free, they'd been waiting for him outside the depot. Dressed in his suit, with his hair still dripping, the pair of them had bombarded him with even more pointless shitty questions. Where was he going? What was he doing? Was he seeing someone? Like the mark on his neck and the ring on his finger didn't scream that. Stupidly, he'd tried to deflect, saying he was on his way to see his omega and son. One of them, less than quietly, "whispering" to her friend he was a "total DILF". He was so fucking done. Climbing into his car, he fished his phone out his pocket. Eren had been providing him with photos since his arrival at the function centre. His fiancée running late to arrive, sending a selfie labeled "I over slept!". It didn't look like it. His love looked perfect. A healthy red glow in his cheeks as he smiled up at him. Sending his mate a quick text to tell him he was on the way, there were only a few moments before he replied, Eren promising to meet him out the front of the function centre.

The function centre had the usual crappy parking. Levi having to partially block the alley running between the side of the centre, and the next building. He was lucky to even get space, and it wouldn't have been a problem if the arsehole with their tiny car hadn't parked half over the bay lines. With the day he'd had, he was sorely tempted to smash their windows in. Jogging up the front steps, he finally managed to crack as a smile. Eren looked brilliant. Dressed in a dark suit with an emerald green shirt, and white tie, his mate took his breath away  
"Levi?"  
"You look amazing"  
Blushing softly, Eren walked over to him, grazing his cheek with a soft kiss. His hair had been neatly combed back, forming a man bun. He normally hated them, but he looked amazing. There were probably a million different words to describe how good his omega looked, yet his brain had short circuited to "amazing"  
"Thank you. You look... hot. And tired"  
"Hot as in hot? Or hot as in hot?"  
"Sexy. Gorgeous. Perfect. Hot"  
"I wanted to look nice for you"  
"Oh, you look nice. More than nice... you have no idea the things, you in a suit does to me"  
"I seem to vaguely recall"  
"As much as I'd love to show you, we'd never get back inside"  
Looping his arm through Eren, he smiled a dopey smile. Clueless to the way his silver eyes sparkled with affection for his omega   
"Shall we?"  
"We shall. It's actually impossible to get lost in this place. The dance studio was just too small for everything"  
"Have you been busy?"  
"A little. I had to help sew up last minute costume tears, but no. No heavy lifting"  
"And you're ready?"  
"Yep. Sasha is the one having the meltdown. She wanted to change costumes again"  
"Again?"  
"This is costume number 6. She was going to go with pink to begin with"  
"I think you could have pulled it off"  
"Noooo. I'm just lucky I'm not in a dress. Honestly"  
Escorted by Eren, the whole inside of the function centre had been transformed... not that he knew what it usually looked like. Decked in Christmas colours, it bordered on tacky, but was saved by the fact it was December  
"Ignore the decor. Dance mums are fucking scary. They all thought they knew best and this is what happened. It's what I imaging reindeer vomit to be"  
"I don't know. There's a few things in here that look amazing... especially you"  
"You're killing me here..."  
"Not my intention I promise"  
It was nice to see all eyes on Eren, his fiancée walking through the tables with a sense of confidence that nearly had Levi tripping over his own feet. It stroked his and his alpha's egos to know he was the one going home with Eren at the end of the night. As they walked, a few people waving to Eren as they walked, Eren politely waving back  
"You haven't missed much. Just the boring speech part and the smaller children"  
"I'm sorry for being late"  
"I'm really not mad. Now, all the drinks are ID only. Hanji ordered you a drink already. She's going to take Viren tonight because I've been busy all day. And I'll probably need help stretching tonight"  
"I can stretch you"  
"Mmm, as much as I like the sound of that, I don't want to wake up with leg cramps tomorrow"  
"Then I'll have to stretch you thoroughly"  
"You need to stop talking, or we're going to be in some real trouble"  
Levi thought his mate was being flirtatious, until he noticed some very disapproving mum's glaring. 

Reaching their table, Eren pulled his chair out for him  
"Hanji, remember. Keep an eye on him for me"  
"Eren, we have tequila. What's going to go wrong"  
Eren put his hands on his hips, scolding her  
"You're only allowed one"  
"Two, I've arranged for Eld to take us home. I just have to call"  
"I have to go now. Here, take care of my phone. I don't really want to leave it in my bag"  
Passing it over, Eren kissed him softly. Ruffling Viren's hair as he stood  
"I'll see you later. And you, be good for daddy and Hanji"  
"Good luck"  
"Break a leg"  
"Don't tell him that. He's got enough pins in his ankle"  
"You two behave"  
"We will!"

Almost as soon as Eren had Disappeared off to the side and out of view from the tables, the concert? soon started. Levi didn't know he needed a hip-hop dancing Jesus in his life until it happened. Nor did he know that the star of Bethlehem knew ballet, but his favourite was the tap dancing sheep. This shit was great. People didn't appreciate his laughter, Viren staring at him like he'd lost his marbles. Mary went to kiss Joseph, Joseph burst into tears and ran off the stage. The little girl dropped the baby Jesus doll, the head coming off and she kicked it off to the side, acting like nothing happened. The whole nativity scene acted out by dance and it was gold.

The next set was more of the same, though it was older kids. If had to guess, he'd say from 10 years, or so, to 16. Santa doing some Latin dance with rudolf, and instead of dancing the Christmas tree sang. The chimney had a wardrobe malfunction, or the kid just didn't give two shits. They couldn't move properly, falling on their back and doing the best interpretive dance of a stuck turtle he'd even seen. While everyone whispered around them, he and Hanji were struggling not to laugh. Anna wanted to help them, trying to escape Hanji's lap.

After the Santa set came to an end, the stage area was cleared. He and Hanji both needed the break. Then came the teenagers dance performances, which sadly went off without a hitch. After that was a small break before the ballroom dancing started. It was now most of the small children left with their parents. Returning with another drink, Hanji was grinning ear to ear as she returned. Anna had needed the bathroom, the little girl in love with everything going on around her  
"Enjoying yourself?"  
"That was great"  
"Good. I'm going to enrol Anna, what about Viren?"  
"I think he might be a bit too small right now"  
"You just don't want him stuck in a chimney"  
They really shouldn't be laughing...  
"He's enough of a handful as it is"  
"I wonder if they managed to get them out of there"  
"I have no idea"  
"I wonder if Eren got to watch?"  
"I hope he did. I didn't realise it would be so... Christmassy"  
"Neither did I. I wish we'd brought the others now"  
"I don't. Erwin's in a sulk"  
"Yeah. I have no idea why. I asked if he could pick me up tonight, and he lost it at me"  
"I needed this more than I thought"  
"Well hold onto that feeling, Eren will be up soon. If it's like the first two bits, they'll work their way from youngest to oldest"  
"Is it horrible to hope for another stuff up?"  
Hanji ducked her head, checking to make sure no one was listening  
"Nope. I am too. I hope they have DVD's of this. Or one of those crazy dance mums has been filming"  
"We'll have to ask Eren"  
"Yeah"

The younger kids were kind of adorable as they danced the best they could. The girls were wearing way too much make up, looking more like mutant, oversized dolls than people, while the boys were dressed as gentlemen. One kid had the cockiest grin on his face, onto to end up with foot stomped on by his partner at the end, when nudged her out the way for more attention.

"Hi, Guys! Fancy seeing you here"  
"Connie! Lovely to see you again! Here, come sit with us"  
Unlike Levi, Connie was wearing a causal shirt and jeans. The alpha all smiles as he sat down next to Hanji   
"What'd I miss?"  
"The funniest shi-shoe. You're not going to get into trouble are you?"  
"What? No. Sasha told me not to bother coming until late"  
"Seriously? You missed the best bits"  
"As long as I see her dance, that's the main thing"  
"Well, we seem to be in the teenagers now. It shouldn't be too much longer"

Hanji was wrong.

It seemed to take forever. There was a short break after the young dancers, until the M.C finally returned to the announce the senior dancers performing the Viennese Waltz to Alice's Waltz. Levi sitting forward in his chair, as Eren swept in with Sasha on his arm. His omega looked so cool and composed, that Levi ended up half squishing Viren as he completely forgot his son in his lap  
"Uncle Eren!"  
"Shhh, Anna. Uncle Eren knows you're here"  
"Mummy"  
"Shhh, baby. Let's just watch mummy"  
"Go Sasha!"  
Sasha shot Connie a glare as she and Eren took their places.

Eren was breathtaking. Out of all the dancers, his omega... he seriously took his breath away. He expected Alice's Waltz to take longer than a minute or so that it did. Eren and Sasha looked like naturals as Sasha draped herself in Eren's arms. Eren spinning her around as if it was nothing, and as if he wasn't 4 months pregnant. Clapping politely, Hanji leaned across the table to smack his arm  
"You need to breathe"  
"Whoo! Sasha!"  
Connie was on his feet, not caring he was making a scene. Standing Sasha back up, Eren bowed as Sasha curtsied. Her dress looked stunning, but no where as nice as his fiancée  
"I am. I just... I didn't expect it to be that nice"  
"Of course you didn't. You don't exactly scream the type to dance"  
Walking off to the side of the dance floor, Viren wanted his mum. Their son trying to escape him to go running after Eren.

One by one, each couple was called forward, their names, dance style and song announced, before an arrangement of 3ish minutes. Levi impressed by each style of dance, as he'd expected each couple to waltz or something to that effect. Anna was really into, clapping her hands slightly out of time with the music, as Connie encouraged her. Given how quiet everyone else was, it was a miracle they weren't told to shut up. Eren and Sasha were the last couple. Eren holding Sasha's hand as if Sasha was a princess. Both of them smiling as they took their places a few metres apart  
"Dancing the Foxtrot to Christina Aguilera's Say Something. It's our final couple. Mr Eren Yeager and his partner Mrs Sasha Springer"  
Connie kept his mouth shut this time. Perhaps knowing better than to upset Sasha when she was in character. Eren looked slightly more nervous, but relaxed as the music started. Acting flirty, then shocked and betrayed, Sasha danced around Eren, before Eren took hold of her hands. It seemed to him that the pair made better use of the space than the other pairs. Not that he was biased. He was in awe of Sasha's fancy footwork, until Eren started. The pair playing arguing and reconciling lovers perfectly. The dance ending wish Sasha "dying" in Eren's arms. There were a few very tiny moments Eren looked as if he was about to panic, but no one but him would have known the way his mate moved. Standing Sasha up, once again, Sasha span away from him, their hands catching at the last moment, Eren bowing and Sasha naturally curtsying again. Jumping to his feet, Connie was clapping as he yelled   
"That's my wife!"  
Sasha blew his a kiss, before letting Eren guide her off the dance floor. Only for then all to be called back on, bow and curtsy again. The M.C announcing another short break. Leading her over to them, Eren released Sasha's hand. The woman going to her husband as Eren came to him. Lifting Viren up, he nuzzled into the boy's face, careful not to upset his graze. Eren then staring at him, and Levi no longer remembering the English language   
"You broke him"  
"I can see that, Hanji"  
"Uncle Eren, you looked beautiful. But Sasha was prettier"  
Sasha giggled  
"Thank you, Anna"  
"Levi? You're not going to say anything?"  
"Wow..."  
Eren laughed softly. His sweaty omega sitting down in his lap carefully  
"Thank you"  
Rubbing Viren's back, their son kept his face hidden against Eren's chest  
"He's definitely broken"  
"Shoe up, Hanji"  
"No. He's coming too..."  
Struggling like an idiot, he really didn't know what to say. Eren was out of his league. Hanji however, had no problem with her mouth  
"Sasha, does that mean you're done?"  
"Yep. That's me for the night"  
"You were wonderful"  
"Thanks. Eren is such a great partner. I'm going to miss dancing with him"  
Readjusting himself to turn to Sasha, his mate rolled his eyes   
"You make it sound like I'll never dance again"  
Sasha huffed. Climbing out of Connie's lap to sit beside her husband  
"It's going to be a long wait to find another suitable partner. Most don't like the foot work of a foxtrot"  
"Eren's great at throwing himself into complicated things"  
"Oi. I'm sitting right here"  
"We know. You're supposed to be going and getting ready"  
"I know, but it can wait"  
"I thought you wanted to clean up"  
"That's why it can wait. Besides, someone is getting sleepy"  
Sasha yawned, then winked  
"How did you know?"  
"You haven't eaten in the last half an hour"  
"I don't eat that much... but do you guys want food? I've got food"  
Levi's stomach rumbled slightly, though he knew exactly what he wanted to eat  
"That would be great. We did eat before, but it's a long night for the kids"  
"I'll help you"  
Climbing out his lap, the kiss Eren bestowed upon his lips was hardly kid friendly. Breaking the kiss, Eren had a cheeky smile on his face  
"Damn, Shitty brat"  
"I love you my arsehole of an alpha. Viren's just about asleep, and I suppose I really do have to get ready"  
"Ok. Will you be alright?"  
"Yep. I've got something special planned, so don't take your eyes off me"  
"I would never"  
"I'm dancing for you"  
Oh shit... Levi had a feeling he was even more fucked than he thought he'd be... Eren could be quite the schemer. 

 

Sasha returned with three piled platters of food, like it was normal. She'd changed from her dress into more casual clothes, the smile on his face just as wide as when she'd left  
"Eren's fine. He's getting ready, and they'll probably set the stage up shortly. The thing about pole dancing is that they kind of have to be secure"  
Levi nodded, it was the polite thing to do. Eren's lingering scent was all over him. The salty tang of sweat, and the sweetness of pregnancy. He really wasn't sure he could stand to known everyone was watching his omega...

 

Tuning out Sasha and Hanji talking about dancing. Levi noticed most of the people had left. He couldn't blame the parents, but it seemed rude that the senior dancers wouldn't stick around for the end of the thing. A few more people had arrived, all dressed in a variety of skimpy outfits that did nothing for him. Anna was sleeping in Hanji's arms, just like Viren was. Shifting his son, Hanji nodded to him  
"Eld and Gunther are on their way. They've got my car, so they've got the car seats in the back"  
"It's probably for the best"  
"You look exhausted"  
"I feel it. I've been up since 3"  
"Will you be alright getting Eren home?"  
"Yeah"  
Returning to her conversations it seemed to take an eternity and a half before the stage was set properly.

 

*  
Perking up as the final act was announced, Levi wasn't sure he liked the fact Eld and Gunther were there. The organisers really didn't seem to care that there was a substantial increase of alphas in the room. The few omegas that were there, were nervously clustered together near the doorway, as if scared of getting too close to the alphas in the room. Eld and Gunther would never hurt Eren, but Eren was erotic as hell. His mate's beautiful body would be on display, and if the two were gone, that was two less alphas looking at his mate.

When the dancers finally walked out, Levi couldn't help but growl. Rushing over to him, Eren draped a pink feather boa around his neck, before jogging over to take his place. Dressed in gold booty shorts, angel wings, a plastic halo, and a beaded gold shirt that sat just below his mate's breasts. His eyes painted with teal and gold, to match the war-stripes on his cheeks, and gold mattress. His hair half braided... Fuck... Way too much of Eren's glorious pregnant body was exposed. Hanji shot up in her seat, full of excitement   
"Holy fuck! Levi! Did you know about this?"  
Eren had said he'd be covered... technically his budding breasts, and butt were covered... but damn...  
Sasha and Connie both wolf whistled, while Levi growled. He wasn't impressed at all. No one whistled at his Eren   
"Doesn't he look great? He said everything had to be just like this. Down to his make up and braids"  
"He's recreated the first night you met! Levi, it's his last time dancing for months, maybe ever. Look at him! I forgot how..."  
"Hanji, you probably don't want I finish that sentence. Levi looked ready to explode"  
Eren had wanted his eyes on him. He had his eyes on him, and the eyes every other shitty alpha in the place. He could smell it. The stink of horniness. His alpha was furious their omega was showing his pregnant stomach like it was nothing. Only they were supposed to see Eren like this   
"I think it's romantic. He told you not to take your eyes off him. And that he was dancing for you"   
"He said it had to special for Levi"  
Special was not the word he'd use. It felt like that dirty strip club all over again. It may be Eren's body, and his choices. But didn't he care about his own image?  
"Levi?"  
Snarling, Levi turned on Eld   
"Keep your fucking eyes closed"  
"Now, Levi. You don't know that it's going to be erotic"  
"Yeah. He is covered, and he's not the least dressed person up there"  
There was an alpha who was clearly confident of his body, wearing way too much fake tan, and yellow underwear that just didn't fit right... it didn't change the fact that despite his anger, Levi was rock hard, but it did make him secretly hope others in the audience were too busy laughing at him to look at his mate.

Yeah. No. He couldn't delude himself. Eren was soooo much better at pole dancing than he was at Ballroom. It seemed absolutely effortless, as Eren's eyes remained glued on Levi. The whole time they were completing the group routine, Eren's eyes never left him. He swore each time his fiancée stuck his arse out, Eren knew exactly what it was doing him. 

Next... what came next sent him into overdrive. He really should have expected individual routines. Instead of names being announced, probably thanks to how worked up the crowd was, the announcement before the changing in the music marked the end of each dancers routine. Eren dancing to "I like that, by Static Revenger". The way his mate moved up and down the pole, it reminded him of an omega in heat. Spinning and twirling, Eren was in complete control. His eyes narrowed, like that of a predator stalking their prey. Each move a perfectly timed strike. He was ensnared. Eren was the hunter, while he had no chance to flee. There was no other way to take it other than sexually, when Eren stood in front of the pole, placing both hands on his knees as squatted and spread them wide, before slowly snaking his way up with his arse rubbing against the pole behind him. Levi was shaking. His heart was racing, and his clothes felt plastered to his body. He needed to be in his omega, he needed his omega to understand he was his, he needed to fuck Eren's tight little arse until his mate couldn't think of anything other than. And he knew that's exactly what Eren wanted him to feel. He was dancing in the omega's palm.

 

*  
Eren felt alive as he danced for Levi. He felt powerful and sexy, enjoying the feeling of everyone looking at him, while he knew just how worked up Levi was. The costume may have been a bit much, but he really wanted to recreate the night they'd met 5 years ago. He wanted Levi to know just how much he wanted him. Before leaving that morning, he'd changed their sheets. He'd scrubbed himself down thoroughly, and made sure he was nicely stretched for his alpha by using the biggest butt plug they had. He'd been planning this night for so long, and if he was having to quit dancing again, then he was going out how he wanted. Glistening with sweat, and flushed red. He couldn't stop licking his lips. His underwear was sodden with slick, and his flimsy garments felt rough against his skin. Working his body to the music, he'd enjoyed every single moment of it, getting lost as he'd danced around the pole, thinking of Levi the whole time. By the time he'd finished his performance, his whole body was trembling with need. The place might be filled with alphas and omegas, as pole dancing was one of the more popular classes, with 4 seperate classes being held at the studio, and Levi might be using suppressants, but all he could smell was his alpha. Stepping off the platform the pole was mounted on, his alpha stormed over to him, grabbing him by the arm and dragging him off stage. Levi was panting hard, his scent coursing through his senses as he was dragged along, powerless to resist, yet not scared in the slightest.

With no knowledge of the place, Levi managed to find the side door to the alley, Eren stumbling as he shoved up against the brick wall, Levi's knee slotting between his legs as his mate pinned him there. Fighting back, he freed his arms, grabbing fistfuls of Levi's hair as he aggressively kissed his mate. Mewing at the friction against his throbbing dick, he started to grind against Levi's knee as his lips sought his mate's in desperation. His wings wearing as they snagged on the wall. Growling into his mouth, it felt Levi's hands were everywhere, yet he was no closer to getting what he needed. Letting out a growl of his own, he pushed against his alpha, whining when the stimulation between his legs was torn away. Flipping him around, Levi tore down the back of his shorts, the front plastered to him with precum and slick. Whining, he jumped as Levi's hand cracked down against his bared arse  
"What the fuck was that?"  
"I was dancing"  
Smacking his arse again, he was too far gone with pleasure to register fear  
"You were showing your body off to everyone"  
"I was dancing for you alpha"  
Smacking his arse again, Levi's hand groped the stinging area, Eren whimpering as he heard Levi fumbling his pants undone  
"I told you to cover your body"  
"I wanted... I wanted you to see me"  
"Everyone fucking saw you"  
"But it was all for you. All for you, alpha"  
Raising his hand, and smacking his arse again, Eren shuddered he was so close and Levi wasn't even inside of him yet  
"Alpha... alpha, please. I need it"  
"My dirty little omega"  
"Yes... yes, please. All I could think about was you... mounting me"  
"You want my dick?"  
"Please..."  
Eren mewed as Levi pushed in without warning, his fiancée riding him hard and fast  
"You let all those alphas see you"  
"So they'd know they could never have me"  
Panting his words out, Levi growled. Fuck... he was so close  
"Alpha... all for you. I need it... need you to fill me... agh! Mmm... shit... so good"  
Grabbing his hips, he was pulled back from the wall, Levi's angle changing and hitting his sweet spot perfectly   
"Fuck! Fuck... right there... fuck, Levi... so good. You feel so good..."  
He could feel the drag of Levi's erection each time his alpha moved, not quite as loose as he had been, the sting from the sudden mounting only intensified everything he was feeling. This was his alpha. Inside of him, he felt Levi growing thicker, a long wanton moan falling from his lips, Levi's pace growing all the more harder and rougher as he chased his own orgasm. Eren felt like his heart was about to burst, everything felt so good  
"Alpha! Need it... I feel soo good. So full"  
"That's right. You need my knot. You need your alpha to teach you who you belong to"you   
"Yes... ahhh... Levi... Levi, I'm going to come"  
Pulling out, Eren was so close. Before he knew what was happening, Levi had him with his back back against the wall as his alpha lifted him up, wrapping his legs around Levi, he rode him the best he could to match each of Levi's hard thrusts, his alpha mouthing at his neck as slammed into him hard enough that he felt completely dominated. Lewd moans filled the alley, their scents filling the space around them, both of them forgetting where they were   
"Alpha. Alpha... agh, Levi. Levi!"  
Screaming Levi's name, his whole body tensed, his back arching as he came in his shirt and Levi knotted him, continuing to fuck him until his knot caught completely. Limp from coming hard enough for the world to go black for a few moments, Levi changed the moment he came. His alpha's rough kisses turning sweet. Nuzzling his neck as he his rolled stuttering hips gently, yet hard enough to send spikes of pleasure through his thoroughly drilled opening  
"Mine. My omega... fuck, Eren... you're beautiful. I'm so lucky. So lucky to have you"  
"Alpha... I love you. I love you, Levi. I'm yours. I'm all yours. Always yours. So good to me. You feel so good. You fill me so perfectly. Love you"  
He was babbling, he couldn't help himself. Moving his hand from his hip, Levi cupped his face, his kiss long and loving. Breaking only when they needed to breath, their breathing and heart rates still coming back down from their high.

Levi kept him pinned against the wall until his knot started to lessen. Sharing secret kisses, Eren couldn't wait to for round two. When Levi finally slid out, his opening was too abused to stop the running of slick and cum down his thighs. Pulling his shorts up for him, stood him on his feet. His alpha taking the time to strip his suit jacket off, to wrap around him, before bothering with straightening himself up. With his wings ripped and ruined, and his halo on the ground, Levi lifted him into his arms  
"Are you ok?"  
"Mmm... feels good"  
His underwear didn't, but his throbbing arse did  
"I wasn't too rough?"  
"No, Levi. I love you... God. I love you so much"  
"You did it all on purpose, didn't you?"  
"I wanted to recreate the night we first met. If I have to stop dancing again, I wanted to dance for you. You were all I could see"  
"You looked way too fucking sexy"  
"It was all for you. It's always all for you"  
Yawning softly, Eren rested his head against Levi's shoulder   
"Where are we going?"  
"My car's just down the alley"  
"My bag's inside"  
"It's alright. Once I get you in the car, I'll find it"  
"Mmm. Thank you..."  
"I don't know if you should thank me"  
"I do. You let me finish dancing on my terms. Last time I was fired for stealing. I didn't have a choice"  
"I wish you'd worn something more"  
"I covered my breasts out of respect for you. I didn't want to go too far from my original outfit... but I didn't want to show them"  
"Thank you"

Sitting him in the front seat of his car, Levi made sure he was safe and comfortable before heading back to retrieve his bag. Still aroused, he wanted his alpha to hurry up and come back as he shimmied out his ruined shorts and used them to clean himself up. It was dark enough that no one could really see what he was doing, and being surrounded by the warmth of Levi's jacket and aroused scent was causing him to slick so hard that he no choice but to sacrifice his shorts.

When Levi came back, the car was filled with the scent of fresh slick. His alpha groaning as he climbed in  
"You smell like you're in heat"  
"I'm so fucking wet. I'm sorry, I got slick on your seat"  
"It's fine, but... are you not wearing pants?"  
"I slicked through them..."  
"Eren..."  
"Take me home"  
"I don't know if I can make home when you smell like that"  
"Then take me somewhere we can we alone"

Levi managed to keep it together until they got home. His alpha even getting the pair of sweats he'd worn to function centre out of his bag so he'd have some dignity as he was carried up to the apartment. The moment they were inside, they were rushing to undress each other, Eren feeling completely safe as Levi carried him into the bathroom. Bent over the bathroom counter, and with Levi hold his right leg up, his alpha mounted him again. He didn't need to ask, both of them painfully aroused from their leaking pheromone as his mate rode him. He really loved being fucked from behind. He loved the way Levi got a little more primal and rougher. Soft and sweet was what he needed most of the time so he didn't fall apart, but if he presented himself, Levi knew he could let himself lose control. He loved his mate dissolving into snarls and growls, chasing his own pleasure and feeling his fingertips digging into his hips. He'd stopped presenting or letting Levi touch him like that when he'd started thinking it was over between them and that they were drifting apart... He'd laid on his back and spread his legs, enjoying it for the most part, but this was so good. Nipping at his skin, Levi's left hand went to his breast, kneading hard at the forming bud. Letting his head loll forward, he came. Not ashamed to revel in the pleasure he was feeling. Knotting him again, Levi lowered his leg, his mate's hands slid down to his stomach, Levi's eyes meeting his in the mirror  
"You're beautiful"  
His make up was smudged, his hair messed up, his lipstick smeared across his and Levi's lips. His war-stripes seemed to be the only thing that had come through everything relatively ok, yet Levi was gazing at him so sincerely   
"So beautiful. You, pregnant with our pups, filled with my seed. So sweet I can taste you in the air. I can't control myself"  
Grinding against him, Eren gasped as Levi's knot jostled, his pouty lips remaining slightly parted as Levi kept grinding. It wasn't hard enough to force the knot, just it wasn't subtle enough to just be ignored  
"I want you"  
"I want you too"  
"Will you mount me?"  
They hadn't done that in a while either. He didn't know if he could come again, but given Levi was still in the mood, his alpha obviously could  
"I want my omega in me. I want to feel you Eren"  
"I... want to make you feel good"  
"When my knot goes down, let's take a shower and then we'll move to bed?"  
Nodding, he didn't know if he'd make it to the bed. He'd been on his feet all day, and he'd come so hard it felt like a dick was a volcano erupting. Not to mention the way Levi was touching him, he was likely to come again, even if his body had no semen left to spill.

 

Levi prepped himself in front of Eren. Their shower had been more of a make out session. Once Levi's hands started working his breasts, his body decided he needed more as he turned to putty in Levi's grip. Laying on their bed with his legs spread, his alpha slowly worked the smaller of their dildos into his opening. Low moans spilled from Levi's thin lips, as the toy was greedily drawn deeper. He wasn't supposed to move, but he wanted to make Levi feel good. Crawling forward, he could feel the slight pull of his stomach as it hung, but Levi's pleasure came first. Nudging his alpha's legs apart further, Levi looked down his firm stomach to catch his eye. Echoing the movements he knew so well from Levi, he slid his hands down Levi's inner thighs, before kissing his way down each as Levi trembled. Sucking a small possessive hickey, he smiled at the sight of his marked alpha. He knew Levi would be thinking maybe a blow job, instead he reached down to take the toy, Levi releasing it as his hand brushed the alphas. Pulling the toy free, Levi's hips jumped, the alpha growling in warning. Ignoring him, Eren pulled Levi's legs onto his shoulders. He'd only ever eaten Levi out once, and he'd been terrified about trying again since. The joys of being pregnant meant when he was horny like had been after dancing, he was pretty much a slut who wanted to try everything. Starting slowly, he began to lap at Levi's opening, Levi letting out a long groan, spurring him on. Licking and lapping, he slowly built up enough courage to work up to fucking Levi was tongue. His alpha moaning his name as his hands first came to rest on his head, before realising his mistake and dropping them back to the bed. Working to loosen Levi, he felt a little foolish as he moved to alternating between using his fingers and his tongue to open him. Levi unravelling beneath him, his breathing growing uneven   
"Eren... I want you... I'm ready"  
Pulling back, he wondered for a moment if he'd done something wrong. There was a tinge of something a kin to anger in Levi's scent. Reaching over his alpha for the lube, he wasn't sure if Levi was actually ready. He wasn't as small as most omegas... he didn't want to hurt his alpha, but he didn't want to push him too far that teasing turned to frustration.

Slicking himself up with a generous application of lube, be moved to line himself up with Levi's opening. Without the slick or natural loosening, Levi was unbelievably tight as he pressed himself inside. He'd forgotten this. How soft and warm it was to be in his mate, and how it felt to have Levi clenching so sweetly around him. Knowing he'd hurt him even more if he stopped, he kept himself from bottoming out too fast  
"Fuck! Fuck... Eren..."  
Looking to Levi, his alpha realised he'd slightly scared him  
"It feels good"  
"You arsehole. I thought I'd hurt you"  
"No. You could never hurt me"  
He might say that, but Levi was getting older. His alpha had work the following afternoon, and it'd do no one any good if Levi couldn't walk. Waiting for him to adjust, Levi let out a breathy moan as Eren lifted his legs off his shoulders, pushing them up and slightly out. Unfortunately because of his stomach he couldn't see himself buried in his mate  
"You can move"  
He really wasn't confident with topping. He much preferred it when Levi rode him... It was still a marvel that an alpha would consider letting their omega top them. He knew the feeling though. Sometimes you want to be held, and sometimes you want to be the one doing the holding. Maybe he'd feel more comfortable topping if he didn't hate himself so badly? The thought would have normally niggled at his mind until he'd fallen apart, but choosing how he stopped dancing had made him feel almost invincible.

His rhythm was a little jerky, as it took him a while to find a rhythm that worked for his rapidly fatiguing body. With Levi's legs spread with and stretched tightly around him, he pounded into his alpha, the lover's cries nearly as loud and obscene as his usual ones, Levi much more vocal than usual. Feeling his own orgasm starting to build, he knew if he came, he probably wouldn't have the energy to finish Levi. Growling, he lifted Levi by the legs, letting him thrust down harder and giving Levi enough space to meet his movements roughly, his hand sliding between their stomach as he threw his hand back fucking his fist just as hard as he was fucking himself on Eren. Both of them soon coming, Levi cum splattering across the bottom of his stomach as his own filled his mate. For a moment he wondered what it would be like for Levi to be the one pregnant, but quickly disregarded it. He might have issues with being an omega, but being able to carry Levi's children was a source of pride. The way Levi loved to watch his stomach grow. The way he'd sleep curled around it, or spend hours just touching it as if confirming it wasn't a dream. Not being an alpha, the didn't have to worry about him pumping an insane amount of cum into Levi, and there was no knot. Sliding free of his alpha, he lowered Levi's legs, kissing the sides of his knees as he did. Above him, Levi opened his arms, and he didn't need asking twice. Dragging himself up, he collapsed next to his alpha  
"You're so good to me. I love you"  
"I love you too"  
"Give me a minute to catch my breath, then I'll clean your stomach"  
He tensed, thinking Levi was just making an excuse to run to the shower. A stupid whimper escaped, feeling vulnerable in his current state of exhaustion   
"Hey, I'm not going anywhere. There are wipes in the drawers"  
"S-sorry. I think I'm over-tired and over-stimulated"  
"I love you, and I'm not about to let you go. I thought you feel better not crusted with cum"  
"I will. I'm just so sleepy"  
"You had a big day"  
"Yours was longer"  
"I'm not the one growing our pups. How do you feel? Is your body ok?"  
"Mmm... Levi..."  
"What is it?"  
"I... I want to be able to give you what you deserve, but I don't know how to top"  
Nuzzling into Levi's chest, his alpha stroked his hair  
"That's ok... it's probably going to be easier with this stomach of yours, if I ride you"  
"I'm sorry. I don't know if I'm ok at it"  
"The way my arse is throbbing and the fact I just came, I'd say it was good. And the way you went down on me was hot"  
Kissing the top of his head, Levi patted his hip as he did  
"I don't know what to do"  
"Alright. It's alright. Here, I'll get the wipes and you can wipe your mouth"  
"Ok..."

Levi cleaned him, and settled them both down. He liked cuddling naked like this. Levi holding him flush against him, nothing in the way. It was worth sweaty balls. Even if his alpha took him like this, it wasn't quite the same as when he presented, though it did make things easier when they both woke horny. He liked feeling Levi's warmth like this, moving Levi's hand to his stomach, his alpha kissed his shoulder  
"Good night, Eren"  
"Mmm, good night"  
"And good night, little pups"  
Eren let out a small snort, nuzzling into his pillow. All in all, the day had been some kind of magical dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok. I didn't know where to chuck it in, because Eren was fucking thirsty to the point he has slick running down his inner thighs as he danced.
> 
>  
> 
> Levi ate. He cleaned up in the function centre. Sasha had retrieve Eren's bag. He did take a break to pee, but ya know, didn't wanna stop the flow...
> 
> He also got into a little bit of fight, given he'd just fucked Eren and Eren's arousal was all over him. He was called out of his slut omega, and if Eren needed taking care of by a real alpha. Instead of blowing his lid, he snubbed them, anxious to get back to his omega.
> 
> Soft Levi is the fun to write


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are now entering the request arc :)  
> Don't worry. I do know how this story ends...

Christmas had come and gone leaving Eren feeling like a beached whale. His stomach has popped after his dance wind up, looking as if it had doubled in size between then and Levi's fortieth birthday. The growing pains over the last few weeks sucked, as had the spotting of blood. He'd just been feeling flat and yuck since, all he wanted to do was sleep all the time. Something not happening with a three year old toddler that seemed to be a constant sugar high. It was the only way he could explain how Viren had so much energy... even Titan seemed to have more energy. 

With Hanji, Erwin, Mike and Levi all working Christmas Day, they'd had a party for the kids on the 23rd, during which he'd fallen asleep. Then he and Levi had celebrated his alpha's birthday on the night of the 24th, and early hours of the 25th. They'd eaten cake in bed because of his fatigue, while watching movies on Levi's laptop until Levi had to go. Working an extended shift, his mate had left the house at a little after 4am, working right through to Boxing Day. It'd really fucking sucked. He loved December 25th. Still, even if Levi couldn't be home, he hadn't been alone. He'd had another small party with the kids on the Christmas Day, eating way too much as they watched Christmas movies, cuddled up on the sofa with the two children. Anna was completely fascinated by the swell of his stomach. The little girl couldn't believe he had two pups growing in there. Viren on the other hand didn't seem too impressed, even smacking him in the stomach when he couldn't get comfortable thanks to curve of his swell. His son did not want a sister. At all. Where as Anna wanted them both to be girls. Marco and Jean were leaving the second week of January, leaving Anna without her two little friends. It wasn't fair to her that it was right before her birthday party, but Anna was a tough kid. The little miss finally actually turning 4, instead of just having her age rounded up because of how smart she was.

 

*  
Cuddled up under the beautiful blanket Levi had gifted him, Eren felt revolting. He really loved the blanket, it was so soft, and sparkly, and the colours of the sea were everything he could want. His sneaky alpha had snuck it on their bed while he'd slept, waking later on Christmas Day to find it there. Slightly enthused, he'd yelled into the phone as he rushed to thank Levi for it. That seemed like months ago, rather than days. Outside the door of his old bedroom, he could hear Viren playing with Titan, but felt too weak to even move, running hot and cold simultaneously, while his between his legs ached. He knew he had to get up, but he was so tired...

"Mum! Mummy! Muuuuuuuum!"  
Pulling his blanket over his head, Eren whimpered at the sound of his son's voice. Managing to get the door handle undone, Viren came bounding onto his bed, jumping up and down right next to him... this was not going to end well...  
"Viren, stop"  
"Wake up, mum!"  
The rocking wasn't appreciated by his stomach, miserably, he only just managed to get his head free from the covers before throwing up down the side of the bed, Viren still jumping on the bed as he did, though not quite as enthusiastic  
"Mummy?"  
Falling to his knees, Viren landed on his hip. Eren whimpering from the unneeded pressure on his stomach and the sudden shock  
"Baby, can you get mummy's phone for him?"  
"Mum?"  
"Baby, please. Mummy is ok. Just get my phone for me"  
His phone was all the way back in the living room, not the safest of places, but he was only supposed to be taking a nap while Viren did. Now there was no way he could get out of bed.

"Mummy!"  
Dropping his phone in his face, Eren was jolted back to consciousness. The light of the device blinding as he clumsily unlocked the device. He didn't need Hanji's mothering... and he didn't want to worry Levi. This time of year was awful for him. Finding Mike's name, he barely hit call before his phone slipped from his hold  
"Mummy?!"  
"I'm... sorry baby..."  
He couldn't hear Mike repeating his name, Viren throwing his arms around him. He hadn't felt like this when Levi had left. He'd been exhausted, but over the last few days, it'd gotten worse. Now, two days short of the New Years, he felt like death had come for him.

 

"Eren?"  
Tapping his face, Eren whimpered away from Mike. He didn't remember passing out, but he must have if the alpha was now there  
"M-Mike... something's wrong"  
Mike was blurry as he swam in and out of focus. With his hands against Eren's face, Eren could smell the man's worry  
"You're going to be ok. Can you move?"  
"No..."  
"Alright. Up we go"  
Lifting him, Eren shivered as if his body had been plunged into an ice bath  
"Why didn't you call Levi?"  
"He's... stressed"  
Was Mike always this loud? Shivering, he was moved from his bed to the sofa, the light coming through the windows blinding. Flinching as he tried to open his eyes, he quick gave up  
"Headache?"  
Nodding only made him more nauseous   
"Vomiting and Fever? Abdominal pain?"  
Humming hurt but worked  
"How far along are you?"  
Shouldn't Mike just know this shit? This was why he wanted him instead of Hanji, because Mike didn't usually ask him a trillion questions. Couldn't he see how tired he was?  
"Eren, keep talking to me. How far along are you?"  
"18 weeks"  
Letting his head loll back, his eyes slid closed. Mike tapping his face  
"Fuck off... hurts"  
"If you can swear at me, you can stay awake for me"  
"Sleepy"  
"Sorry, Eren, but you need to stay awake"  
Mike has zero chance of that happening. 

 

*  
Called by Mike, Levi was confused as he headed through the main doors of Shinganshima hospital. Mike hadn't told him what was going on, only asking him to come meet him. Erwin had said Mike wasn't working, and the fact he wasn't meeting him in the emergency department had lead him to believe it may be related to Mike's health, and whatever was causing the rift between him and Erwin. Mike looked grim as Levi approached, the man sitting at one of the small tables near the hospital's auxiliary shops  
"Levi"  
"Mike"  
"Are you going to tell me what you're doing here?"  
"Come with me, I need to have a talk with you"  
That didn't sound ominous...  
"Mike, is everything alright?"  
"We should have a talk"

Lead through the hospital, Mike was prepared. Entering a small consulting office, Mike took a seat in the rolling chair, gesturing to the narrow visitors chair beside the desk  
"Mike, this better be good"  
"I had a call from Eren today"  
Ok... That was unusual, but not completely out of the normal... There was no need for his heart to start racing. Opening the Manila folder on the desk, Mike passed him over a series of ultrasound prints  
"What am I looking at?"  
"Sacrococcygeal teratoma. Type one from the looks of it"  
"And..."  
"Eren has developed an infection in his right breast, he called me this morning disoriented and vomiting. He'd also had a small bleed, so I sent him for an ultrasound. The growth you see is four weeks, as you can see, there's been a rapid increase in mass"  
Wait. What. He hadn't even looked at the name in the corner of the prints, blindsided by his own deduction that this was about Mike. His brain kicking into overdrive   
"What?"  
"I'm sorry Levi, we'll monitor this carefully, but if the rate of growth continues like this, the pup will need to be aborted. As you can see, the foetus is significantly smaller than the other"  
"Hang on. Just. Why the fuck didn't you call me?"  
"My first priority was getting Eren emergency care. His fever was dangerously high, and the bleed had stained his sweat pants. He was in and out of consciousness. He's stabilised now, and resting"  
"He's been tired lately, but he wasn't feverish, or vomiting. He was fine when I left this morning"  
This couldn't be happening. Not after the loss of the pup... And Eren really had been fine. He'd been tired, but Levi assumed that was more to do with the fact it was the end of the year, and the rainy weather... and...   
"Does he know?"  
"No. He said something was wrong, but he was too out of it to know what. I'm so sorry, Levi"  
"You're talking as if they're already dead!"  
He didn't mean to snap, unable to take his eyes off the scan. SCT's weren't uncommon, but they did pose a risk of growing rapidly between the 18th and 26th week. The pup to the left seemed happy and healthy, but their twin... Eren was going to fall apart over it...  
"Where is he?"  
"He's on the ward. Viren's with him"  
"He's awake?"  
"He's in and out, his fever is being managed. He didn't know he had an infection. He understands he's in hospital again"  
"I bet he's loving that"  
"He's told me to "fuck off", more than once"  
A cranky pouty Eren could be quite cute, as he usually apologised immediately, then sought cuddles. Provided he wasn't the one who'd upset him... and now he had to tell his mate there was something wrong with one of their pups   
"Levi?"  
"How the fuck... why the fuck? Eren hasn't done anything wrong. He doesn't... Why?"  
"His body has been through trauma after trauma. You both deserve a break"  
"A break?"  
They deserved a whole lot more than a break  
"I'm fucking done, Mike"  
"With Eren?"  
"No. Not with Eren. With everything but Eren. I'm sick of it. We've worked years to get to where we are. I'm sick of leaving him at home. Of missing time with Viren, and time Eren. All I want is quality time with my family before..."  
"Levi. You could live your whole life without that bullet shifting"  
"With our fucking luck, that's a gamble I'm not sure I want to take. Eren told me to think through what I want, and I'm done. He's going to be devastated. This pregnancy has hardly been smooth sailing. Eren's depression. Coming off his mediation, thinking I wanted to leave him. He was going to abort them because that's what he thought I wanted. The only good news was that they both seemed ok... and now... I'm done, Mike"  
Running his fingers through his hair with his right hand, Levi shook his head   
"This is going break him. He already thinks he's a bad mother, and that's when he's doing absolutely everything for Viren"  
"Levi, have you talked to someone about all of this?"  
"Yeah. We had a couples counselling appointment with Krista, and we've talked about it a fair bit. He hates it. You know he hates feeling weak. Since coming off his medication, his PTS has... It's hard to leave him. He's scared that he's going to hurt Viren, or have a panic attack so bad he passes out and Viren is hurt. I'm done with him feeling like that. Especially after all he went through with his first pregnancy and that piece of shit father of his"  
"And Eren will be ok with you quitting?"  
"He'll be worried. He'll be more worried about those attending call outs that involve omegas, but he said he'd support me"  
"He's the one who's going to need a lot of support over the next months. But I really would recommend talking your options over with Eren. If the growth slows, the recommendation would be an emergency caesarean..."  
"Provided it does"  
"Yeah. Pretty much. I'm not his attending, but he'll be in good hands, and I thought I should be the one to tell you"  
"I appreciate that Mike. I really do. Thank you for being there for him today"  
"You should thank Viren too. Eren passed out just after he called me, Viren picked his phone up. Told me "mummy wasn't waking up". He's a strong kid"  
"He and Eren have been getting so much closer..."  
"He did good"  
"He's a good kid. I never thought I'd be a father to begin with, but I would do anything for him and Eren"  
A small flicker of pain crossed Mike's face, before disappearing like it was never there  
"I'll take you through to Eren. Do you need to call work?"  
He'd forgotten all about work...  
"I will after I see Eren"

 

Eren had a nasal cannula in place, Viren sleeping against his side as he snored loudly. A saline IV running into his right arm  
"We've given him a dose of antibiotics. He was dehydrated from his fever. His blood work was all over the place, everything he had, has been going to the pups"  
"He's been keeping up with the vitamin shakes and pills..."  
Eren's blood work shouldn't have been that bad. He ate. He was eating...  
"They're going to keep him in for the few days, at least"  
"He's going to love that"  
"I have a few calls to make. I'll check in with you both later"  
"Thanks, Mike"

Walking over to Eren, he sank down on the side of the bed to kiss Eren's forehead. Sighing at him, Eren wriggled beneath him, all happening within the space of a broken snore. Pursing his lips, Levi kissed him  
"We have to stop meeting like this"  
"I thought you were sleeping"  
"Who says I'm not?"  
"You dream about me?"  
"You are the dream. An upset Viren is the reality. He was awake..."  
It must have been a while ago given how out of it the pair of them had been  
"You look upset, what's wrong?"  
He couldn't just tell Eren, not after he woke up  
"You're in hospital again"  
"Oh. Right... I suppose there is that... they gave me drugs"  
Eren gave him a smile, before explaining  
"Had a headache"  
"How do you feel now?"  
"Just sleepy"  
"Why didn't you call me?"  
"Thought it was just fatigue. I didn't think I'd end up here. You're supposed to be working"  
"I wanted to check in with you"  
"I'm ok... I think... I don't know. I'm sleepy"  
"Then get some sleep"  
"Can you take Viren?"  
"I'll organise it"  
"And I threw up at home"  
"Don't worry, I'll take care of it all"  
"'love you, Lee"  
"I love you too"

Levi didn't know if it was a blessing or a curse that Eren didn't ask about the pups. His fiancée soon falling back to sleep, leaving him to sigh to himself. He was actually going to quit. After a decade and bit, he was actually going to give up the life he'd known... Fuck. Now he wished Eren had been alert enough to have that conversation. He didn't know how to be anyone but himself, and he'd been doing a pretty piss poor of that as he'd staggered through life. He'd believed he'd be doing his job until the day he died... and now, because of Eren, his job was coming to an end and what did that make him? They'd talked about finding a new job, but at his age, he didn't know what he wanted to do. Seeing pointless crash after crash, and death after death, he was tired of it. But when he did quit, that meant saying goodbye to everyone around him. No more calls through the radio from Petra. No more glares from Olou, or chats with Nanaba. No more complaining about shifts with Eld and Gunther. No more being stuck with Erwin and his overbearing concerns. No more running into Mike and Hanji in the Emergency Department. He'd be leaving all of them behind. And then what? They drifted? Because strangers on the streets? People always promise to keep in touch, but how often did that really happen? What was he without them? An alpha. A father. A piss poor fiancée, with omega so heartbroken he won't even let him try to plan their wedding? It was... a lot. No more waking up to crap shifts. No more cleaning ambulances because the shitty idiots before them couldn't do their shitty jobs. No more being screamed at abused for doing his job. No more being called out to mass fatalities and accidents... What was he supposed to do? What could he even do? He wasn't built for customer service. He didn't have the patience for pretty much anyone other than Viren or Anna. He didn't have a whole lot of skills other than cleaning, and he wasn't about to waste his time on people who didn't appreciate it. He'd just turned 40. He'd never planned to... well, live this long or fall in love. In his pocket, his phone began to vibrate. Sliding off Eren's bed, he pulled the device out to find it was his boss. What was he supposed to tell her? I know I've left you in the lurch before, but now I'm going to quit. He had obligations... but he had even bigger ones to his mate. Could he even be the alpha that Eren needed to get him through this? Eren had told him about his need for space, but his chronic fatigue had left his omega quite docile and cuddly... once they got him back on his feet, Would Eren feel smothered again? He was far too independent for his own dependant good. What if being home all the time lead to them fighting again? What if Eren actually wanted to walk on him when he realised there really wasn't that much substance to him. The buzzing of his phone stopped, only to start again immediately. Levi's voice trembling as he raised the device to his ear and stuttered out "hello".

Despite her usual understanding attitude, the end of year stress had gotten to all of them. The woman not happy that he'd run off without telling anyone where he was going on or why... especially when he was supposed to be working. He didn't want to leave Eren. He didn't want to have some nurse scaring the fuck out of him by telling him what was going on with their pup, without explaining everything thoroughly. Yet. Back to work he was forced. He had to call Mike to ask him to take Viren. Hanji was working, and he assumed that maybe Anna was with Marco? He'd asked her not to drop the little girl off to Eren, because he knew Eren was tired... Tired. Not sick. He'd personally had a good feel of Eren's breasts, yet hadn't felt anything there... How the fuck was he supposed to take care of his omega if he missed something like that? It was as if every concern of the last 5 years of knowing Eren, swept in and swamped him all at once. His age. His job. His relationship. His relationships around him. He didn't have clear answers for any of it. He was supposed to know. Yet he didn't have a single clue. He needed Eren to wake up and tell him what the hell he was supposed to do. Eren was his hope. The reason everything around him had changed so drastically. The omega had rounded off his rough edges, and smoothed out the parts of his lacking personality. He'd taught him that the way he saw the world, wasn't the only way to see it. And that the world was so much bigger than he'd ever thought it could be... Maybe things could be ok, if Eren was there... and Viren... Eren would mad if he didn't mention Titan in their family. To a lot of people, that would be a pathetic reason to give up everything, but for those tw-three he'd... Yeah. It was time.

 

Despite his desires to get back to Eren, Levi forced himself to seek out his boss. Erwin had huffed when he'd explained Mike had taken Eren to hospital, and Levi was done with him on the spot. The remainder of his shift spent exchanging the bear minimum to get things done, he didn't even bother to clean the ambulance through once they were done restocking. Finding the woman in her office, he tried to hold his temper back. She had a job to do, and it wasn't her fault that she needed things to run as they should. With an apology that was lacking, yet had all the actual words there and all the feelings he could muster for it, he finally told her he was resigning permanently. Initially she didn't want to take no, until he was forced to bring up Eren and the complication with their pup. She couldn't process the resignation immediately, due to the fact they both had obligations and she had a replacement to find, but promised that by the end of January everything would be settled, and that if he wished to return, there would always be a space open for him. 

Walking from the depot, there was definitely a bounce in his step that hadn't been there for a long time. A month was a fucking eternity when you had a sick omega that may need to abort a pup, and life that didn't seem to want to settle, but at least his leaving this time wouldn't be the same mess it was the last time he'd quit. Eren had told him to talk it through with everyone around them, yet for the first time in a long time, he felt free of their unwanted, even if well meant, advice. He'd chosen for himself, and at his age, it shouldn't have left him feeling quite as giddy as it did. He hadn't even left for good, and he felt a weight off his shoulders that pushed away his earlier spiralling maelstrom of thoughts. Now to get back to Eren.

 

*  
Sitting on his bed, Eren had both hands on his stomach as he stared blankly towards the window. They'd had to give him some kind of sedative, which had left him feeling empty. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream or do something. Instead, he was disconnected from his emotions and his omega. He could feel it nudging at the back of his mind, trying to reconnect with no success. Having dozed off and on, he hadn't been sure that Levi had really been there until he'd woken that evening, realising that Viren was no longer by his side. The pain in his head and stomach had eased, as had the nausea. His skin still felt revolting from how much he'd sweated with fever, he'd asked one of the nurses if it was possible to shower, the man replying that "his doctor didn't want him out of bed just yet. Not until they'd assess the growth on the pup". Demanding to know what that had meant, the man hadn't appreciated his snarl, which lead to being sedated as no one wanted to tell him what hell was going on with his own children. The looks of pity shot in his direction sent his stomach rolling, as he realised everyone was acting skittish and secretive around him.

He didn't even jump at the light knock on his doorway. Turning toward his alpha with blank eyes. Finally. Finally something close to a tear welled in his eye. Whining softly for his mate, Levi strode to his side, gathering him up against him  
"Eren"  
Buried in his lover's scent, he rasped out  
"Is this my fault?"  
Levi stiffened against him, before moving to sit on the edge of the bed beside him   
"No. No, it's not. No one quite knows what causes it"  
"They... let it slip that there was a growth. Is this because I was on medication? Or because I couldn't eat? Or because there's something wrong with me?"  
Levi knew. Levi knew what was going on. It was him that didn't. He was the one they didn't trust with the truth  
"Did they tell you anything?"  
"Mike did. You were too exhausted to talk earlier. How do you feel now?"  
"I'm not allowed to get out of bed to shower. I feel gross... Levi, why did this have to happen?"  
"I've been asking myself the same thing since Mike showed me"  
"Can you tell me? No one will tell me. They dosed me instead"  
Levi let out a small growl, causing Eren to whimper. His alpha turning angry in a fraction of second, leaving his soothing scent turning bitter and flooding his mixed up senses with fear  
"I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you. I wanted to be the one to tell you, so I could explain it all properly. Has Mike been in?"  
"I don't know. I've been sleeping then drugged"  
"Alright, here, lay back down and I'll take my boots and jacket off"  
He didn't want to lay back down, he'd been stuck there all damn day. The blankets felt wrong against his skin. Too itchy and like they were trying to rub his skin off. When he'd thrown up on them, he was brought more of the same. He wanted his blankets. His bed. Stupid Mike  
"The bed feels gross. I sweated a lot"  
"Let me pull the sheets back. Let some air in their to help dry things out"  
"I'm not allowed out of bed"  
"They probably mean they don't want you walking around. Wait here"  
Yes. Because he fully intended on doing a runner. The moment Levi release his hold, he felt just as lost and disconnected as he had before his mate had arrived.

Levi stripped his bed back, before finding a chair for them to use. Sitting on his alpha's lap, Levi was content with having his arms wrapped around him  
"Sacrococcygeal teratoma. That's what it's called. Essentially it's a tumour at the base of the spine that causes "abnormal" growth. They don't know what exactly causes it, but it's thought it's from when we were evolving from monkeys. There's a few different types, Mike hazarded a guess that it was type one, which is probably the best type to have..."  
"But"  
"SCT's are known to go through a period of rapid growth between the 18th and 26th weeks. Mike showed me the scans. They're not great..."  
"But it... I didn't see anything on the last one. He didn't see anything on the last one"  
"I know. And I know Mike feels bad"  
"He said everything was ok!"  
"Shhh... shhh, I know"  
"What... what happens now?"  
"Mike is going to make some calls"  
"And then what?"  
Levi paused, he didn't like the pause  
"Levi? What happens next? What happens with our pups?!"  
"Shhh, calm down for me. I know you're freaking out. Our pups are fraternal. Two seperate little lives growing together"  
"I know that"  
"Well, it means that... if things don't improve, that... the pup will have to be aborted"  
Aborted. That word had been in his life way too often in the past months. If he'd just gone ahead and aborted, they never would known it was three pups, and their little pup wouldn't be hurting like this...  
"I..."  
"Don't even say it. Ok. No. I'm happy you're pregnant. I'm happy it's twins and we'll work this out"  
"How?"  
"The same way you should be doing everything, and that's together"  
"It's just... it's not fair... Hanji's first round of IVF didn't take... and I had three pups... and..."  
"No. Don't go there. Ok. This dirty old alpha loves you"  
Levi was trying to make him feel better, even though he knew how much this was hurting his alpha. Fuck. He had to stop crying in front of him. Levi was just as precious as Viren. He didn't want them seeing him like this anymore. He was too miserable and tired for jokes, still, we weakly forced out the words  
"You forgot "Perverted""  
"There's that. You feel cold. Why didn't you tell me you were feeling so sick?"  
"I was tired. I didn't even know about the infection until... after I was brought in... Fuck. I need to apologise to Mike"  
"Eren, you don't have to change the topic"  
"I... I don't want to cry right now. Do you have your phone?"  
"Why?"  
"I want to look it up... I hate the way they look at me Levi. They all know and I don't"  
"I don't know if that's a good idea"  
"It's my pup too!"  
Yelling at his mate, he regretted it immediately. Sliding from Levi's lap, he moved to crawl back on to his unmade bed  
"Eren"  
"No. It's fine. I'm a dumb omega after all. Why would they tell me anything?"  
"Don't be like that"  
"They all think I'm too stupid to make my own choices or understand. I mean, why else wouldn't they tell me anything"  
"Because you're sick. You have an infection that neither of us picked up. You've been in and out of consciousness. You had a fever. You've been vomiting and dehydrated. You even had a bleed. I can think of a hundred reasons why they would have wanted to control you fever and stabilise you before talking about it!"  
Biting his lip, Eren knew he deserved it  
"I need to see because I can't understand. I need to know what is happening to the pup. To your pup"  
"Our pup. Eren, I'm really..."  
"So you don't want me to know either"  
"I didn't say that"  
"You didn't have to! I get it! Keep the stupid incubator out of the loop!"  
"You know that's not it at all. This is why I wanted to tell you, myself. If you hadn't snapped at me, what I was going to say was I'm not sure you want to sit up there. It's still drying"  
"Oh..."  
"Are you going to come back down here?"  
"If you're here, can I go to the bathroom?"  
"You need the bathroom?"  
Yelling wasn't great for his bladder, neither had been moving"  
"Yeah... then can you show me, what's happening to the pup?"  
"I'll have to call a nurse to disconnect your IV"  
"Can't you? I don't want to see anyone..."  
"Eren..."  
"Please. I'll be good?"  
"You haven't been bad to begin with..."  
"And maybe I can shower"  
"You can pee"  
"I smell"  
"I'll talk to them about letting you shower, and if you can, I'll help you shower. For now, just stay still"

Levi swore at the IV colourfully, as he disconnected and capped it, and his cannula. Eren was sooo close to being able to walk... it was like 2 metres, it wasn't going to do any harm. But noooo... Levi carried him into the bathroom, sitting him down on the toilet, before staring down at him  
"I'm not peeing with you watching"  
"Seriously?"  
"I'm not you. I don't randomly walk in while someone's showering to pee"  
"We've both seen every inch of each other's body. We've both exchanged every bodily fluid possible"  
"And I don't want to pee in front of you"  
Levi rolled his eyes  
"Lee, please just let me pee alone. You can even flush the toilet if you have to"  
"I just don't want you walking around"  
"I am peeing. Not walking"  
"Fine. I'll be right outside"

Peeing was a beautiful thing, his bladder appreciative. He couldn't stomach looking at his stomach. He couldn't bare the guilt. He hadn't known anything was wrong with his pups... he'd thought things were fine... he'd thought his growing pains and spotting were fine... he'd had them with Viren... Things had been looking up. Especially after his dance wind up. Levi was possessive, but understanding. He'd finally understood why dancing the way he had, and why it'd been important to him all along... He'd thought his fatigue was just because of two little lives growing. Even Levi had thought it was normal... neither of them had thought anything wrong with his swelling breasts, both were tender... Mike must have found the small lump... Hanji's shift must have started after he'd already been transferred up to the ward... He really hated that people were touching his body without his permission while he was unconscious. Carried back out to the visitors chair, he was hooked back up to the stupid IV. He was ready for bed all over again, but had to know what was happening  
"I know you don't like it"  
"You're right. Can you show me?"  
"I looked it up at work..."  
"Show me"  
"Alright. Just know, we don't know for sure it's going to be as bad as what's in the photos"  
"You're terrible at hiding your feelings"  
Levi moved behind him, resting his head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around him. His mate had already loaded the google images, while Eren's lip quivered. He hated to think of the pups suffering. Pups that hadn't done anything wrong... and even worse, pups that hadn't survived... He'd seen this before, he just hadn't know what it was called. His father had had so many books and files... He probably had to be ready for anything...  
"L-Lee..."  
"I know. We won't know anything more until more tests are run"  
"They... they killed a pup and mum"  
"What do you mean?"  
"G-Grisha had... a child like this. I mean... delivered. The mum died during birth"  
Levi locked his phone, throwing it on their bed, to hold him properly   
"No. Eren. No. This isn't anything like that place. You're here, in hospital. You're in better hands than his. You're not alone through this, and there a things that can be done"  
"Yeah. An abortion"  
"We don't know it'll get that far..."  
"Levi, if Mike's saying it, then he thinks it will. What the fuck is wrong with me?"  
"Nothing. Nothing at all, Eren. We should get the nurses in to change your bed for you. You're feeling warm again"  
Levi wanted to go. Of course he did. He'd been working and Eren had taken up his time. He probably just wanted to go home to Viren. The one child he'd gotten right...  
"Y-you should go home"  
"I'm not going home"  
"You have work, and Viren. Where is he?"  
"With Mike. I waited all day to see you again"  
"I don't want to mess with your shifts"  
He was giving Levi an out, that he could take and not feel guilty over... So why wasn't he taking it  
"I'm staying with you. Let me get those nurses"

 

Something for his infection and returning fever was run through his IV line, while Levi laid next to him. It was nice to know it wasn't just him who thought the hospital blankets were awful, but he was filled with dread when Levi promised to bring his blankets in tomorrow. Levi wouldn't be bringing in blankets if he wasn't going to be trapped here for a while. He probably would have been able to get more out of Levi, if he hadn't kept dozing off. He didn't even know he did, not until he woke to find Hanji forcing food on Levi. It stunk. Spicy Thai still wasn't his most favourite food in the world, and had way too memories associated to it  
"Eren! Why didn't you tell me you were here? I have food, can you eat? Are you allowed to eat? Where's your chart?"  
Pinching his nose, the awful cannula had been shoved back up it. Groaning, he wanted them both to fuck off  
"You're upsetting him"  
"Your face is upsetting him. You should have called me, I would have come right over"  
"He called Mike. Probably so he didn't have to see your shitty face"  
"Levi, you wound me"  
Now Hanji knew what was going on... She had to if she was here. She knew... Couldn't he just have time to process this? Closing his eyes, he tried to ignore the bickering pair   
"Eren, you ok?"  
"I'm hoping you're both going to be gone when I open my eyes"  
Levi laughed, while Hanji gasped   
"I bring food and this is all the love I get! I'm hurt!"  
"You had it coming"  
Maybe if he kept his eyes closed, they really would disappear  
"I really should go find your chart..."  
He didn't want that  
"Hanji. He has an infection. He's going to be fine. They're only keeping him in because he's pregnant"  
"You two are hiding something from me"  
"Hanji..."  
So she didn't know? She just knew he was here... Levi's voice was gentle growl  
"What? I'm worried about my boy and my two little pups. Infections can cause all kinds of complications, and this pregnancy had a rough start"  
"Hanji, drop it"  
"I knew there was something going on. Talk to me. I am a doctor after all"  
"Hanji, he's had a long day. Let him rest"  
"I'll just have to..."  
"Leave it alone"  
"I want to help"  
"He needs rest"  
"He can rest, while you tell me"  
"Look, just let him rest. He just woke up"  
"Why won't you tell me?"  
"Mike has things under control"  
The joking had faded, Hanji sounded slightly hurt and offended. Levi still trying to defend him, but Eren was too tired for this shit. Everyone seemed to think he couldn't process and cope, or understand things. He didn't understand and he wasn't coping, but he and Levi deserved some kind of privacy... or not   
"Seriously? What is going on with you two? Why did you call Mike? Eren, you know I would have come right away... You know you can talk to me about things"  
Levi sighed, his alpha taking a deep breath  
"Because..."  
"Because?"  
Parroting Levi's start of whatever his reply was going to be, Hanji got on his last nerve. Eren snapped  
"Because I need to have a fucking abortion. Ok. I'm stupid and I have to have an abortion!... I have to have an abortion, and I stupidly thought that we could have some privacy, but I guess I'm too stupid for that. Now. Can you please go? I want to be alone, in a room that doesn't stink"  
"An abortion?"  
"Hanji, this isn't a good time"  
"Why didn't you tell me sooner? What's going on? I'm sure..."  
Grabbing his pillow from under his head, he threw it as hard as possible   
"Go away!"  
Levi's wonderfully cool palm came to his forehead, he wanted to nuzzle up against it. He wanted his alpha's touch... but right now, it was too much  
"Eren. I told you..."  
"Levi. You said that I could ask for space"  
"I don't think you should be alone right now"  
"I want to be alone"  
To sleep. With no smelly food that reminded him of Zeke and no guilt over Levi being stuck here  
"Eren"  
"Please Lee, just go... I want to sleep"  
Kissing his lips, Levi sighed softly  
"I love you. I'll be in tomorrow. I know it's scary, but we'll get through this"  
"I..."  
He couldn't bring himself to tell Levi he loved him back. He didn't want to tie his mate down  
"I know you love me. I'll bring your phone in before work tomorrow. You can text me anything. Any questions and you can tell me what's going on. I love you"  
I love you. But he said nothing about the pups inside of him... Did this mean Levi didn't want them anymore? He didn't understand anything.

Leaving, Levi took Hanji with him. Despite how exhausted he was, sleep was slow coming in its return as he chewed his lip bloody with guilt.


	14. Chapter 14

Eren felt revolted with himself. The pup inside of barely looked human., the growth was terrifying to see on screen. His first thought was that the tiny pup looked like some kind of mutant, his heart racing as he wondered if the little life was in pain. It was so much smaller than their sibling, the guilt too much as looked from the screen. Yet the image was burned into his mind. He didn't know what to do now. He hated himself for thinking Levi's child looked so disturbing and disgusting, especially when Levi was so in love with them. His alpha wanted these pups so badly, but everyone was talking aborting, and making plans for his future without him. He didn't want to hear it anymore. He knew he was a bad omega... that's how they made it seem. Females and female omegas got sympathy from the staff discussing his case, while he just felt shunned. Judged over his dynamic... They might be awesome at their jobs, they wouldn't be at the hospital if they weren't, but he felt so dirty. Levi would be furious if he told him, so he hadn't. The staff were so much more politer to Levi about everything. They'd explained it to him, and possibly outcomes. Treating Levi like an equal, because there was no way at all an omega could understand anything. They could all fuck off. He hadn't even been able spend New Year's night with Viren. He'd been forced to finish Anna's birthday present in hospital, where they didn't appreciate his arts and crafts project. He'd bought the girl a proper high quality gold locket, it was large for her size, but knowing she'd grow into it. The project they hadn't like was when he'd carefully sealed two small photos with a water proof coating. One photo was of Anna just after her birth, while the other was from the photo of Moblit from the night of his 20th birthday when they'd all been so happy. Moblit might be gone, but he know how fiercely he would loved her. He wanted to make sure Anna knew that every single day of her life. Levi's gift to the little girl was paying for her ears to be pierced, not that his alpha knew. Levi would have probably tried to gift her cleaning supplies if he could have. Hardly the right gift for a four year old who was a total little miss.

After 8 long days in hospital, he was finally released. In his opinion it was 8 days too many, and he definitely wasn't going to miss being there. Hanji had come to see him after his blow up, but he just wasn't ready to talk to her about it. He didn't want her apology, or her forcing a conversation about everything but the pup. He'd wanted more time to figure out everything with Levi. Levi was the father after all. Levi talked to him like he had brain cells. 

With Levi "supporting" him into their apartment, he was beyond relieved to be back home. Viren running ahead of them to jump on the sofa, sending Titan running with his happy yelling. Their son having decided that he wanted to wear pyjamas all day, or at least that was what Levi told him when he they'd come to pick him up. All Eren wanted was a shower and 10 years worth of sleep in his own bed. The stupid clean smell of the hospital had left him feeling nauseous for days. It wasn't the same smell as when Levi cleaned the apartment, and his alpha's scent wasn't there to push everything else away  
"I have a split shift, so I'll be out from 6 to 12, is there anything you want?"  
"A shower. Then some sleep..."  
"Do you want a hand?"  
Nope. He didn't want Levi looking at his body or his stomach. He didn't want anyone looking at his body or his stomach  
"No. I'll be ok. Why don't you spend some time with Viren? If I take a nap, I should be alright to sit up with him tonight"  
"I don't mind putting him to bed before I head out"  
It might not have been Levi's intention to make him feel like the alpha didn't think he could handle their son, but his omega went right there. He'd missed Viren so much, and really wanted to rest so he having extra long cuddles with his son. Finding himself nodding, Levi kissed him on the cheek  
"I put fresh towels in the bathroom for you, and I remade our bed"  
"I'm sorry. I think I want to take a nap in my old room... I'm just..."  
"No. It's ok. You do whatever you need to. There's something I need to talk to you about, but it can wait"  
You don't just tell someone that, then end it with "but it can wait". It was as bad as "We need to talk". What the hell was supposed to do with this piece of information now? Was Levi not under the impression that he was only mimicking a functional human being, when in reality, he was dead on his feet? He couldn't do the words, let alone the adulting. At least not until he'd showered and gotten every bit of shitty hospital scent off. Did Levi not know how much he was looking forward to not having to shower using a shower chair, under the supervision of a nurse because they thought he was going run off through the hospital naked? He wasn't actually sure if that was what they thought, he just didn't appreciate the hovering  
"Eren?"  
"Sorry. I'm too tired to think"  
"It's alright. Go take a shower, and get some sleep. It's nice to have you home"  
Nice. Not "Welcome back to where you belong". Fuck. He'd missed his omega, and the constant love it filled him with his for children. Now it could kindly fuck off again. It only had one job and that was more of a background feeling that the had push past its constant insecurities to feel. Now that he was home, it'd be easier to hide his thoughts and feelings from Levi. Levi had work. He had Viren to distract him, and Titan. He missed the fat cat, and had gone overboard with Christmas presents. Titan had been gifted a new grooming brush, new collar, a new tag, a new water bowl that was a fountain so he always had fresh water, a new feeding station, a new bed, and new scratching post. Levi has teased him for it all, but he couldn't help it. Levi's overweight tom was probably his best friend, as he was so much easier to deal with than people were. Cuddles, pats and food. He liked the exact same things, and Titan was just the right size to be warm and comforting as he slept back to back with him, or tried to wedge himself above the swell of Eren's stomach, and below the pile of pillows Eren liked to use. Starting to walk across the room, Levi closed the door with enough force that he flinched   
"Sorry, it slipped. Before I forget, I left your mail in your room for you. I think there was a package and few envelopes"  
"Thanks. I'll look at them later"  
He didn't remember ordering anything, not that he could remember much of anything... fuck... it was definitely bed time.

 

*  
Viren had come climbing into his bed on his own. Eren had thought sleep would be easy to find, but the moment his head hit the pillow, his mind decided it wanted to be wide awake. His thoughts running circles as he attempted to get comfortable. If anything, his bed was too comfortable, his body melting into the softness of his blankets, and the comfort of familiar scents.

Pulling his son to him, he pressed kisses to Viren's hair. The boy was beautiful. Everything about him was so perfect, even if things had been strained between them, he could never hate him  
"Hey, baby. Have you been having fun with daddy?"  
"Daddy let me wear my pyjamas!"  
His son sounded so damn proud of the fact  
"Did he?"  
"Yep! And we watched 'toons!"  
"You love your "toons", don't you baby. What about Anna, have you been playing with her?"  
"She's a girl"  
"Yep. She sure is... where's daddy now?"  
"Daddy's in the food"  
So daddy was in the kitchen. Ok  
"And you thought you'd come see mummy. You know what that means?"  
Viren looked at him wide eyes  
"Kisses!"  
"Mummy! Nooooo!"  
Blowing raspberries on Viren's cheeks, his son screamed with laughter. So loud that Levi came to check  
"Viren, I told you not to disturb mummy. Sorry, Eren. I'll take him"  
But... cuddles. Viren would probably get demanding soon, but this was nice  
"He's alright"  
"You need your rest"  
"I am resting"  
"Viren, come to daddy"  
Daddy was still his favourite, yet Viren was sweet enough to look torn  
"It's ok baby, you go with daddy"  
"Mum?"  
"If you stay with mummy, there's going to be more kisses"  
Pursing his lips, his son squealed in anticipation. Kissing at the hands that tried to push him away, Viren managed to kick up and against his chest  
"Viren!"  
Scolding him, Viren was confused by his father's tone. Sure it'd hurt, but his son hadn't meant it. Tears welled in Viren's grey eyes  
"It's ok baby. You didn't hurt mummy"  
"I'm sorry!"  
"No. No, baby..."  
Wiggling away from his hold, Viren started to cry the boy stubbornly climbing off the bed to run off past Levi   
"Did you have to scold him like that?"  
"You're supposed to be resting"  
"I was having cuddles with Viren, not running a marathon!"  
"Don't get mad at me for worrying about you"  
"I'm in bed. I'm resting. Viren just wanted a cuddle and I wanted to give him kisses"  
Coming running back, Viren had his favourite teddy in his hold. Ignoring Levi, the little boy climbed back on the bed, shoving the bear in Eren face  
"Mummy!"  
"Hello, Mister Bear..."  
"Mister Bear wants to make mummy better..."  
Eren heart melted  
"Thank you baby, but I think Mister Bear is telling me he wants to be with you"  
Viren beamed at him, even with tear tracks down his face  
"We can share. Just this once though"  
"Ok baby. Mummy is going to have a sleep, do you want to stay with me? Or go with daddy?"  
Viren looked to his teddy, nodding as if it was talking to him  
"I want to stay with mummy"  
Ha. Suck it, Levi!  
"Ok, here we go, come curl up with mummy. Mummy missed you"  
Shifting the blankets, Viren moved into his hold. Mister Bear between them  
"I guess I'll go then... I'll be home a little longer, if you need anything"  
"We'll be fine"  
"Call if you do. Seriously, you need to be resting"  
"Levi, it's fine. I can handle a three year old who wants cuddles"  
What he couldn't handle was a 40 year alpha who was hovering as if he really couldn't handle their toddler. Blocking Levi out, Eren leaned over and pressed a kiss to Viren's forehead, surprised when the boy returned the gesture. This was far better medicine than anything he'd had in hospital.

 

*  
Levi was at work when Viren had woken him, his son shaking him awake to tell him he didn't want to go to sleep. What did it matter if Viren didn't want to sleep? He'd stayed for cuddles until he was content to run off, and now he wanted more cuddles again... he'd take them, even when they were an excuse not to go to bed.

Lifting his son, Eren carried him out the sofa, dropping Viren down in the corner with a smile  
"Did daddy give you ice cream?"  
Viren shook his head. It didn't really matter if he had. He wanted ice cream and Viren didn't want to sleep. They had hours until Levi came home again  
"Do you want sprinkles? Or chocolate?"  
Viren hummed as if he were considering his options, when they both knew what it was going to be  
"Both!"  
Yep. He knew it  
"Ok baby. Give mummy a second"

A second might have been a generous understatement. First he had to use the bathroom, then he had to make sure Titan had his wet food, and that there was water in his fountain, followed by checking the fridge for fruit. He had no idea why Levi insisted on storing the banana's in the fridge. They lived on the bench, in their bowl, where they were remembered. It was their home... not the bottom shelf of the fridge where they didn't belong  
"Muuuuum?"  
"Give me a sec baby!"  
Fuck it. He couldn't remember if he's ever had a banana split, or at least one like in the movies, but he was sure Viren hadn't. They had to be slightly healthy, right?. Nuts, dairy and fruit... and chocolate... oh... fuck it. It was worth it if it made Viren happy. They could all use some happiness in their lives.

Settling down with Viren, the two of the shared the banana split as they watched Viren's choice in movies, something with super heroes he didn't know. Usually he was stuck with Anna's choice. She'd try and sit through the things Viren liked, but the moment there was a break, the program was changed before they knew what happened. The only time it didn't happen is when Eren had hold of the remote. Sitting with his legs along the sofa, Viren on his thighs, and his stomach as the table, both he and Viren jumped at the knock on the front door  
"Daddy!"  
It was too soon for Levi to be home. Scrambling off his lap, the toddler went running to the front door. He hasn't conquered the lock yet, so all he could do was hold the knob with both hands and swing against it impatiently  
"Mum!"  
"Mum's too fat to rush. Hold on"  
Stupid stomach. Being a table was about all it was good for... he couldn't stand it. And he couldn't cope with his hate for it, as one pup in there was still doing just fine. Knocking again, Eren was ready to ignore it completely. All their friends should know better than to knock twice, in his current condition, and delivery people didn't come this late at night. Levi had made dinner, so it definitely wasn't pizza. Hitching the chain on, he flicked the bolt round so Viren could open the door. Shooting him an annoyed glare, his son wasn't happy that it didn't open all the way. Forced to poke his head around the corner, his son huffed  
"You're not my daddy"  
The toddler than shutting the door in the face of their visitor   
"Viren..."  
He couldn't be mad at the boy for his bad manners, not when he wanted to do the same. Opening the door, he sighed, prepared to apologise for Viren's behaviour  
"Hello, Eren. It's been a while. I'm hoping we can talk"

His first instinct was to slam the door in Floch's face. "A while" had been over two years. A while" hadn't been long enough  
"Eren, did you get the letter?"  
"What letter?"  
His voice was sky high, confused as fuck... and leading to Floch raising an eyebrow   
"Sorry. I've been in hospital since... well, a while"  
"I'm sorry to call so late. But when I didn't hear back from you, I thought it best I come tell you that you've been summonsed to appear"  
"Hold on. I have no idea what you're talking about"  
"I'm talking about the Karanes Incident. Look, can I come in? It's easier than doing this through the door"  
"Levi isn't home right now..."  
It was just him and Viren. He didn't need a panic attack, or his nosy three year old hearing anything   
"I did try to keep you out of it, but the trials going ahead. It starts in two weeks time, which means there's a lot to cover"  
Floch wasn't listening him. Why was he so shocked that an alpha wouldn't listen to him in his own home?  
"Hold on. Let me do the chain... Viren's just had sugar... He's either going to ignore you, or have a tantrum... you've got shit timing. I just got out today..."  
Talking more to himself, in an attempt to clam down, than to Floch, Eren closed the front door. Once again tempted to leave it closed. Karanes was years ago...

Letting Floch in, Viren wasn't happy about it. His son refusing to go to bed, or to watch TV when there was a stranger in their house. Lowering himself down into a dining chair, he couldn't help but shy away as Floch's eyes drifted to his stomach  
"Congratulations"  
"This isn't about that..."  
"Viren..."  
"Floch. You're not here to discuss my personal life. I've been in hospital since just before the New Year, and now you're showing up on my doorstep. What is all this about?"  
"You don't need to be on guard"  
"Excuse me. I haven't seen you in years. I would have been fine without seeing you ever again. What is this trial? You said it wouldn't go to trial"  
"Because I didn't think it would. When The Church fell apart, the fall out was huge. Ministers. Politicians. Police. Their influence was wide spread"  
"I know that. Probably better than you do"  
Floch disregarded his curt words  
"One of the politicians is kicking up trouble in order to clear his name. The case is against both the Karanes and Shinganshima Police Departments"  
"And how does this relate to me?"  
"You are the son of Grisha Yeager. We know he worked for them for over a decade. It was you, and he, who destroyed the compound"  
"We both know..."  
"That you were involved. He's determined to show that the statement you provided, is nothing more than speculation"  
"So he needs someone to blame?"  
"Unfortunately. We did know there was a chance of this going to trial, and we attempted to keep you out of it. But as the only one who was actually there... if he can discredit you, he feels it'll go a long way to overturning the charges against him and his friends"  
"And if I don't testify?"  
"You risk being arrested"  
"I'm sorry. But I can't. I've got too much going on here"  
"Eren, he could walk"  
"And I'm pregnant. There's things in this world that we can't change"  
"Eren"  
"I gave you my statement. If they have questions, can't you just like... forward them on?"  
"His defence team is going to want to talk to you"  
"I can't do it"  
"Eren..."  
"I can't! Ok! I can't and I won't. I've been trying my hardest to forget all of it. Zeke. Grisha. Reiner. Bertholdt. All of it! I just want to be left alone"  
Wincing, Eren rubbed his stomach as pain flared across it, he wanted Floch out and the last thing he wanted was to go into labour or something. He didn't want to disappoint Levi   
"Eren. You've been summonsed"  
"And what? I'm an omega. We both know how that works"  
"That's why I tried to keep you out of it"  
Ouch. Yeah. No. Floch had to go. Rising to his feet, he glared down at Floch  
"I told you everything I knew. You have my statement. You have Levi's statement. Viren and Levi both nearly died from what happened. I will not let anyone hurt my family like that again"  
"If you don't testify, these people will be walking free"  
"They're not people. They're shit in human skins"  
"Then you should know we can let them get away with this. I've brought some photos, if you can identify any of them..."  
"It's been three and a half years! Nearly 4..."  
"You just have to look"

"Leave my mummy alone!"  
Yelling at Floch, Floch didn't care. Placing down the file he'd brought with him, he placed it down in front of Eren. Eren sliding it back as he held one arm out, Viren not moving to his hold  
"Viren. Baby. It's ok"  
"You upset my mum..."  
"Viren, it's ok. He's leaving"  
His son continued to glare, Eren kind of proud his son wasn't letting himself be intimated  
"I'll leave this with you. And give you the night to think this over, and to talk to Levi about it"  
"I'm not going to change my answer"  
"There's actually a copy of your statement in there. I wanted to gauge your reaction. Read it. Think about it. Then we'll discuss those photos tomorrow"

 

Floch saw himself out, like it was perfectly fine and normal. Eren frozen in his seat as he stared down at the manila file laying on the dining table. Why now? Why on top of this?   
"Mum?"  
He couldn't even look to Viren. His eyes glued to the stupid file. He didn't want to remember. He didn't want to go back to that place, even if it was through words on paper. He didn't need to read the thing to remember. He couldn't forget, even if he wanted to. Levi bore the scars of his past. He bore the scars of his past  
"Mum?!"  
Anything he said would be pulled to pieces. Floch knew that. That's why he didn't want him around the case. Anything he touched fell to pieces. Anything he touched, he corrupted. Levi... Zeke. Moblit. His father. His mother. Viren. He'd nearly killed his son giving birth to him. He had. Levi had said Erwin had worked on him... The pup inside him... he'd broken them... Then there were the people he'd worked with. Zeke had burnt the club down. Zeke had killed the people who'd chained him up. He'd left a trail of destruction wherever he'd been  
"Mummy... you're scaring me..."  
His arm dropped. He was scaring his son...  
"Baby. It's time for bed"  
"Mum?"  
"Don't argue with me, baby"  
"I don't want to go to bed!"  
"Viren, please..."  
"I don't want to go!"  
"Then go watch TV! Just give me a break!"  
The moment the words came out his mouth, his face burnt with shame. Viren didn't understand. Covering his face, he shook his head. He couldn't fucking breathe. This... this couldn't be happening... His father had destroyed the compound. He'd seen it burn. All of it was gone. Whatever this was. This had nothing to do with him... This was Floch's mess. Floch was the one who'd gone after them all...  
"I'm sorry, baby. Can you please go watch TV?"  
He needed Levi home. He couldn't calm down... he couldn't calm down and he couldn't breathe. Not when this stupid file was here... He couldn't call Levi. Not on the night of his first day home. Not when he'd been rude to him earlier. He couldn't just call him home to save him from a panic attack...

 

*  
Walking into his apartment, Levi had expected the silence. He'd sent Viren in to wake Eren when the boy hadn't wanted to go to sleep for him... what he hadn't expected was the foreign scent of an alpha he didn't know. In an apartment filled with his and Eren's scents, it stuck out like a neon sign, just as pungent and unwelcoming as Eren's scent of distress. Yet. Instead of focusing on that, his alpha was focusing on the real question. Who the fuck had been in their apartment and why?  
"Eren? Are you awake?"  
Locking the door, Levi shrugged off his jacket as he walked towards the laundry. His uniform stank, and with his heart racing, he was trying to calm down with an act of normalcy. Clothes off, laundry on then time for a shower.

Trying Eren's door, he found it locked. Knocking lightly, he got no answer. He was still yet to tell his omega he was quitting work. Eren hadn't wanted to talk while he was in hospital. He'd mostly kept everyone at an arms length, only conveying the things he needed from home. Hanji has tried to talk to him, but she'd gone and put her foot right in it. He wasn't impressed either. Neither of them had truly had time to process, or talk. Eren's fever had returned, the medication administered had left him fading in and out of consciousness. Not that Eren had noticed, he'd start to talk, only to trail off a few moments later, and pick right up again as if he'd never fallen asleep in the first place. Levi had been trying to ask Hanji to leave before she decided to pick a fight with Eren. He knew Marco hadn't been in to see Eren, as Marco didn't even know Eren had been in hospital. Erwin had tried to push, earning himself a black eye in the process due to his lack of sensitivity over the situation. Mike had been decent enough to leave it as "Eren has an infection". Erwin had tried to calm him, calling it "a simple infection that didn't require so much worry". It was the morning after the Hanji debacle, and he'd ended up telling Erwin to "shut the fuck up, because he had no idea what he was talking about". This lead to questions and he'd acted without thinking. Knocking on Eren's door again, his omega stayed locked away from him. Part of him wanted to kick the stupid door in, while the more rational part of his brain told him to break Eren's trust by finding the spare key too it, and letting himself... He forced himself to do no neither. Returning to their bedroom, minus the Eren that had turned him room into theirs, with the hope that his mate would wake before he left for work. Maybe the could even have breakfast together, and discuss his retirement then.

 

When his alarm blared at him at stupid o'clock, Levi was sorely tempted to destroy his phone. His face was frozen to the point his nose was running, and that was with the majority of him buried under Eren's blankets. Shivering as he climbed from their bed, he growled softly as he walked into the living area. The curtains that usually hid the balcony from sight, were fluttering in the cold winds of the morning. No wonder it was freezing. Unsure if he'd missed it due to his tiredness last night, or if Eren had opened it without thinking, Levi walked over to the doorway, ready to lock the outside world away. The sun was yet to rise above the city, the world a dismal grey as he shivered again. Pushing the curtain away, he found his omega sitting on the floor of the balcony, Titan laying next to him. This wasn't what needed first thing in the morning. Didn't Eren feel how cold it was? Or was he completely out of it? Stepping onto the balcony, he mentally cursed the weather, and Eren for making him come out here. Squatting down, he placed his hand on Eren's shoulder, his mate so cold that Levi's stomach did that annoying dropping thing it liked to do when something was clearly up with Eren. Forcing his voice to remain soft and calm, he didn't want to scare the omega into trying to jump, or startle him if he was sleep walking   
"Eren? What are you doing out here?"  
Blank eyes looked to him, Eren's lips tinged blue. He needed to get his omega inside and warmed up. He was still recovering and his immune system still wasn't up to scratch. Eren's body didn't need the stress of becoming a human popsicle   
"I'm not having an abortion"  
Right... ok. His mate wasn't in the best of head spaces   
"Ok... but that doesn't tell me why you're out here"  
"I'm wondering why I'm alive"  
Shit. Just. Shit  
"Did... did something happen?"  
"Yeah. I ruined everything"  
This was not the place for an in depth conversation   
"Eren. How about we go inside? It's come out here"  
"Maybe I can freeze to death. Wouldn't that be fucking funny?"  
There was absolutely nothing funny about that at all  
"Eren..."  
"I told myself that I wouldn't let you see... but I guess I just want your attention after all. I don't know why you stay with me"  
"Eren. Come inside so we can talk"  
"I wanted to forget. I wanted to forget how bad I was. My existence causes pain"  
"Eren, no"  
"I can't even carry your children properly. Did you even want kids? Or was that something else I forced on you?"  
"You know I did. I do. I love you, and I love Viren. I love the two pups inside of you"  
"If I die. Do you think everyone can finally be happy?"  
"If you die, I know I will never be happy. Please, come inside with me"  
"I'm tired, Levi. No one wants to listen to what I want. Not the hospital. Not Hanji. Not dad. Not Zeke"  
"I want to listen. Here, come here"  
Eren let himself be pulled up by him, but didn't make a move to help walk back inside. Titan ran straight in, giving him a look that seemed to say he was watching over Eren until Levi got his shit together. Doing all of the work, he got Eren to the sofa, then backtracking to close the balcony up, making sure the top bolt was done so Eren wouldn't be able to just let himself back out there again. Freezing cold, he made another detour, grabbing the topmost blanket off their bed, before finally returning to Eren's side.

Sinking down on the sofa, Levi wrapped the blanket around both of them. He wanted to pull Eren into his lap, but the omega was sitting ramrod straight, now not giving into his touches  
"Eren, what happened? Can you talk to me?"  
"It won't change anything"  
"You don't know that"  
"I do. Nothing ever changes. I hurt people and they die"  
"What are you talking about?"  
"I don't understand why I'm still alive. I shouldn't be alive. Dad should have just killed me off when he killed mum"  
He was fast growing angry at the lack of sense Eren was making. It was too early for such shit  
"You're not making sense"  
"Don't worry. I won't off myself"  
"Why are you being like this?! You said you needed someone to listen. I'm listening. Shitty Brat, you know I couldn't live if something happened to you"  
"I told you it won't. I won't harm the pups either. I don't want an abortion"  
"I..."  
"Everyone wants me to have one. That's all they talked about"  
The hospital... But that wasn't the only thing they'd talked about. Every day medical science was improving. There were cases of tumours being removed and the mum's being able to carry safely. That was all depending on the growth of the tumour to begin with  
"We have options. Weren't you listening?"  
"Right. You're right. I'm sorry"  
"Hey. You're not alone in this. I wanted to tell you last night, but I've put in my resignation at work. As of the end of the month, it'll be official"  
"Why?"  
The small forced smile on Levi's lips, as he tried to make Eren feel something other than frozen, fell  
"Why what?"  
"Why would you quit?"  
"To be here for you and our children"  
"So I made you quit"  
"No. I made the choice for myself"  
"Would you have done it if I wasn't a bad omega?"  
"You're not a bad omega! You're my omega. My mate. And you're scaring the shit out of me right now with all this death talk"  
"I guess I've said too much..."  
"No. You still haven't told me what set this all off"  
"I did tell you. All I wanted to do was forget, but I'll never be able to"  
A nightmare then? It was the most plausible reason for Eren being so upset, his omega had had a nightmare and hadn't wanted to disturb anyone with it  
"Things will get better. You're still freezing. Why don't you take a bath, while I make us some breakfast?"  
"No thank you. I'm not hungry"  
"That's because you're too cold to think straight. If you prefer we can take a bath together. Whatever you need"  
Placing his hand on Eren's stomach, he wasn't trying to be suggestive, only supportive   
"How can you touch it?"  
"Touch what?"  
"Doesn't my stomach disgust you?"  
"No. Why would it?"  
Rubbing the swell, he didn't understand what was disgusting. He loved Eren's swell, and their pups inside. He was worried for their second pup, but that didn't mean that he didn't care for it  
"I was just wondering"  
"I love it. It fills me with pride to see you growing swollen again"  
Leaning in, he kissed the corner of Eren's lips, feeling nothing in return. Eren was definitely trying his hardest to push him away, and that wasn't happening   
"Let's just take a bath together. I can wash your hair"  
Rubbing Eren's stomach a little harder, the omega stiffly nodded  
"Ok then"

Getting Eren into the bathtub and between his legs, he felt like being a bad father. He couldn't help himself. Eren was slick thanks to his pregnancy, and his nape was right in front of him, while his hands were resting on Eren's stomach. He knew Eren was struggling, but their sex life had been great until Eren's fatigue, and he missed the feelings that came from knotting him. He wasn't about to do anything up his love, but that didn't mean his mind wasn't thinking of bending Eren over the bathroom counter. He didn't feel sexually frustrated, though things had been stressful for both of them. Maybe a little release was what Eren needed? To not be in his head? Resting his chin on his omega's shoulder, he sighed softly  
"How do you feel?"  
"Warmer"  
"Good. It's going to be cold today, so you should stay inside"  
"I haven't got anywhere to go"  
Levi sighed again, this time at himself, before trying to sound playful   
"You know what I mean"  
"I do. I wasn't planning on going anywhere"  
"I have a split shift again, so I'll be home for lunch. Is there something special you want?"  
"Not really"  
"Should I just surprise you?"  
"You don't have to do things for me. You don't have to force yourself"  
"I'm not forcing myself. I love you"  
"How can you?"  
"Easily. I love you. I love you, Eren Yeager, and I'm going to marry your stubborn arse, just to show you every day I do"  
"You shouldn't have quit work for me"  
"I did it for us. For the five of us. I'm tired of missing things. I want more time with Viren, and you, and these two. I want time for us. I want to be able to have sex with you, then lay in bed with you. I went to watch bad horror movies and Titan failing to cat"  
"You want to have sex? When I look like this?"  
"You are the most beautiful creature I have ever met. You're fierce and fiery, yet you can be so soft and sweet. Your stomach is full of my pups, our family growing as you do. I could never not want you. Your just as sexy inside, as you are outside"  
Sliding one hand down to grasp his lover's dick, and using the other hand to force Eren to face him, Levi pushed a hard kiss to Eren's lips. He didn't understand what could make Eren feel so undesirable, when he was perfect. Jerking the omega softly slowly as he thumbed at Eren's slit. Eren was going accept he was sexy and did all kinds of things to every part of Levi's anatomy, whether he liked it or not. He wouldn't force himself on his mate, but he could touch him intimately to show he did want to. That's why he kept everything so light, so as not to make him feel forced. The only display of forcefulness was his forced kiss in attempt to show all his affections through Eren's lips. When Eren pulled away, he let him  
"Levi..."  
He'd thought Eren was about to cry, or to break. Softly replying   
"I love you"  
"I don't want this"  
Releasing his hold completely on his omega to honour his wishes, Eren scrambled to leave the bath. His actions jerky and sudden  
"Eren, I..."  
Giving him a cold glare, his heart broke a little more  
"I'm repulsive. Just... don't touch me"  
Grabbing his towel, his mate made his way from the bathroom, leaving a wet trail as he did. What the fuck was going on this morning?! Eren was cranky yesterday, but it was clear he was happy to be home. Now he was acting... crazy. He couldn't keep up and didn't know what he'd done wrong... Was it the hand job? Maybe it was the hand job? His alpha didn't think it was the hand job. The smug arsehole wanted to keep going with the hand job. God. Now he was going to have to start all over again... Eren's brain was just as sexy as his looks. If given the chance, his mate could prove he had a lightening fast sense of whit, and humour. While it took a tiny fraction longer for things to sink in, he was incredibly smart for a kid who'd never been to school then concurred the school thing in less than three years. He loved being able to have an intelligent conversation with his mate that wasn't to do with Paramedic Procedures...

 

*  
Eren had retreated to his room, refusing to come out, while Viren was still sleeping when Levi left for work. Coming home for lunch, Eren was sitting on the sofa with Viren, his son climbing down and running over to him   
"Daddy!"  
Reaching up at him, Levi lifted Viren to his hip  
"Hey, brat. Did you miss me?"  
"Yep! Mummy made pizza for lunch, but I wanted to wait for you"  
The way Viren said "pee-zah" alway brought a smile to his face  
"You didn't have to wait for me"  
"I was good all morning!"  
"Were you now? Would mummy agree?"  
Viren shrugged   
"Maybe"  
"That's my boy. Give me a kiss"  
Viren kissed his cheek  
"Alright. It's pee-zah time. Eren..."  
Eren wasn't there. He looked to his omega in time to see him disappearing into his room. On his hip, Viren sighed   
"Mummy isn't happy"  
"Not at the moment. He's just feeling sick"  
"He wasn't happy last night either"   
Viren covered his mouth with his hand in a very Eren move, but his comment was already out there  
"What do you mean by that?"  
Viren shook his head. Gently pulling his hand away from his mouth, his son sighed  
"Some man yelled at mummy last night and mum yelled back"  
What?  
"It wasn't Uncle Mike? Or Uncle Erwin?"  
Viren shook his head, while Levi couldn't think of who would possibly picking fights with Eren   
"Ok, well. I'll talk to mummy"

"You don't need to. Here"  
What was the point of closing his door if Eren was going to come reappearing anyway. Shoving a letter into Levi's free hand, his mate took Viren from his hold the moment he could  
"What's this?"  
"I had a visit from Floch"  
Floch... Floch was never good news. Ever  
"Karanes is going to trial"  
"He said it wouldn't..."  
"Yeah. Well. I've been summonsed. He told me he didn't want me near the case and tried to keep me out of it. Even being a whale with a complicated pregnancy won't get me out of it"  
"Eren. The last thing you need to be doing is testifying. When did you find out?"  
Last night. Right. The moment he said it, he remembered it couldn't have been any other time than yesterday   
"Floch showed up after you went to work. Viren and I were watching TV and started trying to mess with my head. I can be arrested if I don't testify. The defence? Wants to pull my statement about "The Church" to pieces so they can all walk"  
Moving to place his hand on Eren's arm, his fiancée flinched away   
"I can't stand being touched right now. I'm sorry, but you need to keep back. I'm either going to start screaming, try to hurt myself or go into another panic attack over this. I wanted to forget, but here we are"  
"You... this morning... I thought you had a nightmare"  
"You have to sleep to have a nightmare. I was reading my statement. Floch was ever so kind to drop a copy by. Viren didn't want him here. Not that I did either"  
"I wish you'd told me"  
"Levi. I came home yesterday. I told myself I wasn't going to tell you anything because I can't..."  
Eren waved towards his head with his free hand   
"... ok. I need to keep things together for a Viren. But he's all I've thought about. I'm tired. I want to thinks things out and just the thought of this going to trial makes me want to jump off the balcony or take the nearest knife and... Can you imagine Viren's life if he gets caught up in it? The son of a psychopath. The grandson of Grisha and the nephew of Zeke. What a great family line that is. I thought we could leave it behind..."  
Bouncing Viren on his hip, Eren kissed his son's forehead   
"For his sake, he can't know. I don't want him to know. About Karanes. About the institute. About the pup. Everything has to be ok in front of him"  
"I'll see if..."  
"If Hanji can take Viren? We can't ship him off all the time. It's not fair on him"  
"We need to talk to Floch about all of this. I wasn't shipping him off, I was going to ask if she could watch him for a few hours while we did. There has to be a way that this can proceed without your statement, or a way to keep you off the stand"  
"The only other person I knew who survived, then tried to kill all of us"  
Placing Viren down, Eren shook his head   
"I can't. Ok. I read my statement. I read it and realised how much I didn't remember when I gave. When I close my eyes, I can remember that place. I was there for three month, nearly 4 years ago and I remember it. I don't know what to do. I stayed up all night and I don't know what to do. I don't even remember what happened or how I ended up in my room"  
Floch was a fucking arsehole. Of all the time he could have shown up, he'd chosen while he wasn't even home. Floch knew that everything relating to Eren had to go through him. It was Eren's request. If he knew he couldn't handle it, he asked Levi to step in as his alpha and his "owner" as too much of society saw it  
"I'll talk to Floch. You do what you feel you need to do"  
"I don't think either of us want that. I just need you to not touch me, or knock on the door"  
Then this morning's bath was the last thing he needed. Shitty Floch. And shitty Eren for not telling him the previous night. He would have handled everything differently if he'd known any of this  
"I'm sorry about this morning. I wanted you to know I love and want you"  
"This morning wasn't good"  
"I know that now... but, Eren, you're not repulsive. You're my mate. My lover, and my pride and joy"  
Shaking his head sadly, Eren stepped towards his room. Eren taking his cloud of gloom with him  
"I don't feel that great. Let me know when you're going to work"

 

*  
Calling Floch, the man arrived a little after 3. It'd taken the better part of an hour to get Viren sleeping, and no time for him to figure out what to do. Letting himself into Eren's room, his mate was sitting on his bed. Sitting just shy of him, Levi went to place his hand on Eren's knee before stopping himself. Letting his hand drop to the blanket instead. None of this was fair, especially with how broken Eren looked over all of this  
"Eren, Floch's here"  
"I don't want to talk to him"  
"I know. And I know you don't want to testify, but you should still be part of this"  
"Why?"  
"Because this is your choice, and I want to back you up however I can"  
"Levi..."  
"I think you should listen to what Floch has to say"  
"And then what? He asks me questions, asks me who I can identify? And then?"  
"We'll talk about what he knows, and why this is coming up now. There has to be a reason"  
"Where's Viren?"  
"He sleeping. He didn't want to sleep"  
"I... I don't have a choice do I?"  
"You always have a choice, and all you can do is make the choice that you'll least regret. I know your need to know and understand everything going on"  
"Sometimes I really hate me"  
"I don't. You're a shit, and a brat, and frustrating as hell, but I don't hate you"  
Eren gave him a sigh  
"I'll be there..."  
"I should hope so. You're the one who organised this"

Floch was sitting at the dining table, where he'd left him. Letting Eren take the other seat, he stood behind his mate. Making sure Floch knew he wasn't impressed at all  
"What is all of this shit?"  
"I can't say I've missed your bluntness"  
"Then don't. Eren isn't testifing"  
"He has to. He'll be charged with perverting the course of justice if he doesn't"  
"Not happening"  
"Look. If I could keep him off the stand, I would. I did try to notify you when thing began moving forward. My calls went unanswered"  
"I didn't have any missed calls"  
"Then have you changed your number? I know you were supposed to be handling everything to do with this on Eren's behalf. We would have preferred that you took the stand, instead of him, but it's his testimony is what is being questioned. We've contacted Erwin Smith..."  
Erwin? Eren looked up to him, equally bewildered   
"You contacted Erwin? When?"  
"November I believe, when I was unable to contact you"  
He was going to knock those slug brows of the blonde bastards face  
"Eren. I didn't know"  
"I can see that..."  
Funnily enough, Eren's voice sounded exactly like Floch  
"I was talking to my mate. Eren will not be testifying"  
"Unless you can give one good reason as to why I can't call him as a witness, he will be there at the start of the trial"  
"He's pregnant"  
"Pregnant people give testimony everyday"  
"I have two emergency department attendings, an OBGYN, a therapist and four paramedics that will all testify that he is not fit to take the stand"  
"All of which are close personal friends of yours"  
"Then I will take him to third party. He is not fit to take the stand"  
"Pregnancy is..."  
"It's a high risk pregnancy that is already causing secondary health issues"  
"It still isn't enough"  
"That's a load of shit! Grow some fucking testicles"  
Floch's eyes narrowed, his teeth bared in anger, Levi growling. There was no way he was going to let this shit of an alpha intimidate him or Eren   
"You know how hard I worked to put all of them away. It nearly cost me my life"  
"And testifying could cost Eren his. And the lives of our two pups!"  
"What happens when they walk? A lot of dangerous people were..."  
"I don't care about them. I care about my mate, and my children"  
"The one survivor we've been able to contact. Every other omega is in the wind. The fallout from this lead to Reiner coming after you"  
"Reiner came after us because he was insane with grief"  
"The trial begins on the 21st. Their lawyers already want access to Eren"  
"That's not happening"  
"If he doesn't comply, their going to pull everything apart"  
"And if he does, they'll go after him!"  
"At least we can be prepared for that"  
"Levi, can you back off a little. Both of you stink"

Levi took half a step back, but kept his hands on the top of the dining chair, dropping his head, he shook it as he took a deep breath  
"Sorry. Look. Floch. This isn't going to happen. I refuse to let Eren testify, and for that matter, why was Erwin on your call list? What has he got to do with any of this?"  
"He was the one who figured out Eren's note, and Eren's message the second time... He'll be testifying over that"  
"He didn't tell me that"  
"That is between you and him. You won't be called because your Eren's mate and legal guardian. I doubt they'll allow Erwin to testify to much more than confirming that the note is indeed the one in evidence. And how he recognised the code Eren left. He will also be testifying over Reiner Braun and Bertholdt Hoover. In particular the time you spent working with Bertholdt"  
Eren rose from his seat, dashing to the kitchen sink. Floch unamused as Eren vomited   
"Look. There was a list of potential witnesses provided and he was just the one chosen. What I need today is for Eren to look at these photos"  
Eren shook his head. One hand on his stomach, as did. It was stupid to believe he could ever get through to someone as closed minded as Floch was. The alpha saw himself as some defender of justice, and didn't care who was caught in the fall out  
"He was released from hospital yesterday. You can't push all of this on him"  
"Like I said. I did try to make initial contact in November"  
"Then you should have tried harder. You know where I work. Fuck. I know for a fact I've seen you dragging your mangy arse through the Emergency Department. No. You waited until you were sure Eren was alone before making your move. He is not some naive or weak omega. He is not a pawn in your game, and you will not be using him for your own agenda"  
"Then I'll be taking him into custody"  
Levi growled, lifting the dining chair he hurled it across the room, where it hit the far side, smashing the back as it fell to the floor  
"Get the fuck out of our apartment"  
Whimpering, Eren covered his ears as he sank to his knees. Eren had told him he couldn't handle touches, or knocking. Now he'd smashed a chair, and let his anger flare   
"Levi..."  
"Don't "Levi" me. You show up and dumped all this shit on us. I told you I would take Eren to any doctor you asked, where he'll be given the exact same diagnosis. Eren told you he doesn't want to testify, or to be a part of this. You got them behind bars without his testimony the first time, and you keep them in there this time. He is not a scapegoat for you"  
"If he's not going to testify, what is to say he isn't a flight risk"  
"He can't fly like this. He's pregnant and he needs to be near a hospital given the potential complications. Are you deaf? Are your ears filled with the shit you dribble? Desperation isn't a good look on you"

Rising from their only remaining dining chair, Flock left a file laying there  
"This trial will be going ahead. I came here today, simply to have Eren look at a handful of photographs. Your open hostility caused this. If he's released, it will be the start of more to come. They know Eren's alive and they won't stop until all traces of his existence is extinguished. When you've calmed, look at those photos. We'll be in touch"

Following Floch to the door, he glared until the man let himself out. As the door closed too slowly for his liking, Levi booted it as hard as he could, before remembering Eren was mid-breakdown. Locking the door, he walked back to the dining table, stopping short of the kitchen  
"Eren?"  
"I have to testify..."  
"Look. We have to meet with a specialist over the SCT. I'm sure they can recommend that you don't"  
"And then what, Levi. They kill us in front of Viren? They take him? He ends up... spread across the world?"  
"I won't let that happen"  
"They're powerful people. You know that"  
Hissing, Eren sank back so he was sitting on his arse, rather than remaining kneeling  
"Are you in pain?"  
"A little..."  
"Can I... I mean... will you let me move you off the floor?"  
Eren looked up with guilty eyes, Levi having to backtrack  
"It's ok. I just thought you might like a hand up"  
"It's not ok. It's been four years. I shouldn't still feel them on my skin. I shouldn't be scared of you. I shouldn't be this useless"  
"You're not useless. I'm sick of hearing you run yourself down. You came off your meds, you lost a pup, your alpha was an arsehole and you gave up on your dream of getting married. Then, when things start to look up, when you finally start to feel better, you find you have an infection and our pup is a little sick. Then that piece of shit shows up sprouting all sorts of shit. You're more than entitled to not be ok, and to lean on me"  
"I don't want to lean on you! All I do is lean on you! You have your own life. You have a right to go out drinking with your friends, or to relax and have fun without worrying or thinking I've gone and hurt myself, or tried to kill myself again! You put so much pressure on yourself and I fucking hate it! I'm sick of tears! Oh look, something's gone wrong, better breakdown like a loser! I'm sick of it Levi. I'm sick of me. I'm sick of everything going to shit when I'm around. I can't even carry your children right. I hate it. I want you to be happy. I want to give you children. I want to be the one who's there for you, and I'm too fucked up in the head to stand on my own two feet. You weren't there in the hospital. Every fucking thing they said came back to aborting. It didn't matter that I was right. I was just a dumb omega. Floch thinks I'm just as dumb, and with so many people thinking it, doesn't that make it true? I can't look at myself without thinking it's my fault. That I'm chaining you down. You say your happy, but what was the last thing you did purely for yourself? On your own and for yourself? You can't think of anything, can you?"  
"I quit my job"  
"For me. Because of this thing inside of me. Because you don't think I can handle Viren"  
"I quit my job because I was done. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of seeing all the accidents. I'm sick of seeing dead people. I'm sick of the shit hours and not being with you and Viren. I missed his first steps. I missed watching him learn how to ride a bike. So yes. I quit because I wanted to spend more time with you and him. I want to be here, with you. I know your probably disappointed. After all, other than my job, I have nothing. I am nothing Eren. I'm a 40 year old alpha who can't even figure out how to be in a relationship with the man I love"  
"What do you mean you're nothing?"  
"I have my job, my obsessive need to clean and my shit sense of humour. What else is there to me?"  
"You're a good person. You're kind, and soft. You care deeply for others..."  
"They're not skills. I wanted to be the kind of alpha you wanted to be with. I wanted to make you happy. I wanted you to be proud of me"  
"I am proud of you. Being your omega fills me with pride"  
"Then why do we keep having this fight? Why can't you believe in me when I say you're beautiful or amazing, or that I trust you"  
"Because I'm waiting for the day when you wake up and see that I have nothing to offer you..."  
Eren's sentence tapered off, his lips forming a silent "oh". Ducking his head, Eren sighed   
"I can't turn off the things in my head. I can't turn off hearing their voices or feeling them against me. I can't forget the deal that ended up with Zeke dead"  
"I know you can't"  
"Then why don't you think I'm dirty?"  
"Because you did what you thought you had to. You always do what you think you have to, to protect us. I don't know if I can protect you, but I made the choice for myself to try. Like I said, we have that appointment coming up, and we'll have more answers by the end of it. Fuck. I wish you could just get it into your head that I love you. Even when your omegas an arsehole, I love you"  
"When isn't my omega an arsehole?"  
"Do you really want me to answer that?"  
"No. It's having a meltdown as it is..."  
"Do you want me to call into work?"  
"No. You should go. After all, I can't exactly march down there and punch Erwin myself"  
"I already have him a black eye..."  
"Levi! No. I can't deal with violence right now"  
"I couldn't help it"  
"You have more patience than I've ever met, other than Moblit. It wasn't Reiner and Bertholdt that made me sick, but the smell of two angry alpha's. Then you threw the chair"  
Levi scratched the back of his head, feeling slightly sheepish  
"And kicked the door"  
"If you're going to be violent, I'm not going to be able to go near you"  
"I'm sorry"  
"Just go take a shower or something. My body has decided I can't move while you're there"  
It was hard not to take that personally, even if he'd brought it upon himself   
"And you'll be ok to get off the floor?"  
"Yeah. I need a minute. Can you check on Viren too? Make sure he's ok?"  
"I'll check on him"  
"Thank you..."

 

How he wished he hadn't thrown the chair across the room. Taking Floch's stupid file with him, he stuffed it in his bedside table, before huffing off the bathroom. Fuck, Floch. Fuck, Erwin, and fuck the universe in general. Showering his anger away, Eren had fled from the bathroom. His door locked, Levi didn't even have to bother trying the handle to know that. Dressing in another uniform, he flooded the apartments living area with scent canceller, until he choked on oils clogging up his lungs. Anything to get the stink of trash out the air. Finally checking on Viren, their son was sprawled across his bed, his bear clutched tight to his chest. Why couldn't Floch see that this trial could very well destroy the life of their son? The innocent pup who only deserved the best things in life. Walking over to Viren's bed, he dragged the slipped covers back up to his shoulders, kissing his soft hair with a loving smile. How could his look so much like him, but have the exact same expressions and mannerisms as Eren? If the boy ended up being even a fraction as strong as his mother, Levi was in deep shit... but he really wouldn't have it any other way.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me say, I don't love this chapter. Nor do I know how it got to be so long. It's basically Levi trying to keep Eren propped up...

Resting his forehead against the toilet, Eren was praying for some peace. He may have slight found he'd forgotten to take his antibiotics since coming, and was now wondering if the fact he felt so sick was because of it, and not just everything happening with pup and the trial. Levi had called out softly to him when he'd left for work, then a few moments later, Eren had found himself on the bathroom floor, throwing up until his stomach physically hurt from the tightening of his muscles. When he'd felt around his bathroom drawer, instead of finding his anti-nausea pills, he'd found his antibiotics. Since Viren had grown, and his curiosity had grown, they'd had to find toddler proof ways to keep his medication out the boy's hands. He hadn't thought Levi would place his medication in there, though it was the only drawer in the whole bathroom that "locked", thanks to the tiny lock Levi had installed himself. The key kept under Levi's things in his drawer. Dry swallowing his antibiotics had only made him feel worse, and having not slept the night before left him not only feeling gross, but gross and sleepy, with the gross making the sleepy impossible. He had to testify. Levi scent had been so agitated, it'd been like his alpha wasn't on suppressants, and even if not directed at him, his omega had gone into meltdown mode, taking his stomach with it. He didn't want to testify. He didn't want to put the pups in danger, and he didn't like the fact that his stomach was flaring with pain over his distress. It meant he needed to monitor himself in case of a bleed, then potentially another trip to hospital.

Hospital. He loathed the place, yet now he was also stuck wondering if Mike knew Erwin had been called to testify. He didn't understand why he would be. They could have asked him about the note. They could have asked him about his time with Zeke, Reiner and Bertholdt. They were probably going to anyway... He already knew the moment he took the stand, he'd be judged for his swollen belly and secondary dynamic. He could probably wear the nicest and richest clothes in the world, but no one would see them. Fuck. He didn't want to remember. If he asked Krista, she'd probably let him listen to their sessions about what happened. Things he felt couldn't repeat were recorded. Things like signing were taped with a camera for Levi to watch at a later date. That was the system that worked best for him. He could get it all out, and if the time came when he was finally able to confront it, he could sit down with Levi and they could confront it together. It still blew his mind that he could have such a kind and caring alpha, who really did seem to want the best for him. Even when his world was turned upside down and everything felt like a dream. It was like the book he'd started reading to Viren, "Alice in Wonderland", where nothing was as it seemed. He wouldn't be surprised to see a hookah smoking caterpillar, or to stumble out one morning to find Titan smoking a hookah, while dishing out words of advice that left his head muddled. What a joke. Who would have thought the kid who'd lost his mum at 10, was found and betrayed by his brother, then nearly wound up dead more than once, would still be paying for that day all those years ago... it all started then, so why couldn't it have all ended there too? Fuck. Every choice his made played on a loop. All the what-ifs made it hard to feel alive. It was like the very thing that made him him, was being snuffed out from the inside out. 

He just wanted it done. He just wanted to be free, and those he loved to live long happy lives.

 

*  
Erwin was waiting for him when Levi marched into work. The man didn't even see it coming as Levi swung for his nose, staggering back, Erwin looked stunned. Around them, their coworkers at the depot stilled. Snarling, Levi bared his teeth. Wiping at his dripping nose, Erwin opened his mouth, but Levi wasn't having it. Eren had wanted to punch Erwin and that blow had been for him  
"How the fuck could you!? November! You've fucking known since November! You fucking knew they wanted to put him on the stand and you said nothing! Is this some kind of fucking joke to you?! This is my fucking family!"  
"Levi! What is going on here?!"  
Some little shit had run to their boss, the woman standing there, looking just as shocked as Erwin had  
"This piece of shit is trying to get my omega, and our children killed"  
"I think you two should come to my office"  
Her voice was soft and calm, trying to defuse the situation. Never in his life had Levi ever felt so betrayed   
"I have nothing to say to him"  
Actually, he just didn't want to listen to Erwin's voice  
"Levi, you need to understand..."  
"No, Erwin. You need to understand. Eren was in hospital with complications from his pregnancy and an infection. One pup has an SCT, that needs monitoring. They've already scared the fuck out of him, shoving ideas of abortion down his throat because he's an omega. He gets out of hospital, then Floch decides to show up, demanding Eren testifies... and then, we find out that you've known for months! He already lost one pup. Do you want him to miscarry? Is that it? He's at home, terrified about how this is going to affect Viren! He was talking about dying! You never said a single thing. Not once"  
"Floch contacted me just after Eren miscarried. He said he was going to contact you, and I told him to wait. The timing wasn't right"  
Levi scoffed openly  
"And what about after that. All those lectures and shit moods of yours"  
"At the time you were both grieving"  
"Of course we were fucking grieving! Our relationship was on the rocks and Eren was so sure that I was going to leave him, he was going to down abortion pills and tell me nothing about it! But you know what, we started getting through it, and you still kept your mouth shut. You had so many chances. I have never, ever, been as disappointed in you as I am now"  
Standing there with her arms crossed, his boss was staring right at him  
"Levi, please. I really think this isn't a conversation you should be having in front of everyone"  
He'd forgotten he had an audience, though most of them had scuttled off like scared mice. Running his hand through his hair, he took a breath to calm himself  
"You're probably right"   
"That's better. Now, both of you, in my office. Smith, is it broken?"  
Erwin shook his head  
"No"  
"Good. Get cleaned up. I did not need this today"

Sitting in his bosses office, the woman started before Erwin joined them  
"I hear you have a lot going on"  
"Just a little"  
"Care to shed some light on the matter for me?"  
"Not particularly"  
"Too bad. Now, what is this?"  
"Erwin dislikes Eren"  
"That's not what I'm asking. I'm asking why it was bad enough for you to hit your coworker"  
He felt like a kid. A snot nosed brat sitting in the principals office, without the sobbing or the racing heart. Just the disappointment  
"Eren went through some stuff a little nearly four years ago. It wasn't great, and we both nearly died because of it. We're still working through the pup having an SCT, when all this had been brought up again"  
"This stuff, you mean the attempt on both your lives by Reiner Braun. You don't need to sugar coat it"  
"That was part of it. Eren was involved in the destruction of a baby farm. A lot of shitstains were thrown in prison for it, and now one of them has decided to cry wolf. Even with the complications from his pregnancy, depression, anxieties, and health issues, they still want him to testify. Erwin knew, and didn't bother to fucking tell us. Floch was too spineless to give us a heads up. Now the only chance I have to keep him off the stand is the report from his specialist over the pup, but we both know that won't amount to much given how badly they want him on the stand"  
His boss sighed, leaving back in her chair   
"And here you thought you'd be enjoying quiet family time"  
"I fuck-..."

Knocking on the door, Erwin let himself in. His nose padded. At least it was still bleeding   
"Erwin, take a seat"  
As Erwin moved to do so, Levi moved his own seat away from the man  
"Now. I've heard both sides of this argument. Erwin do you wish to press charges against Levi?"  
"No"  
"Excellent. I still need to write this up. Levi, I can't suspend you, nor give you time off right now. The best I can give you is split shifts until you leave. I may be able to give you some leeway with Eren's specialist appointment, but finding your replacement has been quite the challenge. Given the issue, I feel separating you both is in the best interest of both of you. Erwin, you'll partner with Ginn. Levi, you and Schultz will supervise the three on placement here. Guys. I know you're better than this, but you both need to think about the example this sets for the others"  
Levi nodded, while Erwin sighed. He had no right to chuck the shits. He was the one who'd proven just how much of a lying wanker he was  
"Good. Now, Levi, do you need to call Eren? Is he expecting you home?"  
"No. He's expecting me to work"  
"He's a smart omega. I'm sure things will work out just fine. Now, I need a moment with Erwin"  
"Understood. Thank you"

For some fucked up reason, Erwin thought it perfectly acceptable to call him, then start with a near constant barrage of texts, telling him to answer his phone. Each and every call went unanswered, the texts deleted and the man's number blocked. He didn't care if it was childish. He had responsibilities towards his boss, and the three idiots he was now baby-sittting. Still, it was worth it. Eren would scold him a little, but he'd understand why. It was a complete and total douche move that broke his trust and left him disgusted in Erwin. He'd been to Viren's birthday party. They'd worked together. They'd worked together on his birthday and New Years. He had weeks between Eren's partial miscarriage and Eren ending up in hospital to open his mouth and spit all this out. When one of the shitty students finally grew the balls to ask what had happened, Levi was more than happy to give them all a very thorough walk through of how to clean an ambulance properly, and how to ensure everything was restocked in the entirety... with zero regret. The more they grumbled, the more he pointed out their mistakes, remaking them do everything all over again from the start. It made for excellent therapy, leaving feeling mildly better as the night came to an end. Now all that was left was to go home to Eren, and Viren. Then to climb into bed, knowing Viren would come crawling into his bed for cuddles.

 

*  
It was a few days after the Erwin incident when Eren came padding into their room. His mate wasn't in a great place mentally, he'd accidentally caused Eren to faint with fear. By simply coming home mid shift after forgetting some paperwork he'd brought home to finish. Looking up from the book he'd been reading, his omega was shirtless and pale  
"Levi, I don't feel good"  
Placing his book down, Levi made space at the edge of the bed. Eren must have been feeling like death warmed up as he waddled over, and sat beside him as if he'd forgotten he needed space   
"What's wrong?"  
"I feel hot"  
Raising his hand, Eren took it, placing it to his forehead  
"You feel clammy. Any nausea? Dizzy spells? Headaches? Or vomiting?"  
Vomiting could be stress, as could the clamminess  
"Vomiting... and I can't sleep"  
"When was the last time you slept?"  
Eren had to pause to think, shaking his head tiredly  
"When I fainted?"  
"Brat, that was two days ago. You need to be resting"  
Two days ago and he'd woken half an hour later   
"I can't sleep"  
Shifting further over, Levi pulled the blankets down   
"Come here"  
"What?"  
"Come here. You can't sleep because your mind is over active. You've hit over tired, and I won't have that. It's not healthy for you, or for the pups. Now. Come here"  
Sliding down, Levi patted the spot next to him  
"I don't think I can sleep..."  
"Then just lay down next to me and rest"  
"I might freak out"  
"And I'll be right here if that happens"

Crawling into bed, Eren grunted as flopped down beside him, before scooting back into his hold. His head resting on Levi's arm, as he wriggled against him   
"Now close your eyes"  
"I can't"  
"You can. It's not hard"  
"I can't stop thinking"  
"Then think about me"  
"This is stupid"  
"It's not stupid. You're going to get some sleep, and then I'm going to make you something to eat. When did you last eat?"  
"I... everything I eat, I've been throwing up"  
"Have you been having shakes?"  
"They don't really stay down either..."  
"Ok. Sleep, then food. I start at 9 tomorrow, so we get an extra 2 hour sleep in"  
"Why 9?"  
"I'm supervising the students at the moment, and they have an exam in the morning"  
"What time does this exam start?"  
"7"  
"That's not humane"  
"They need to be able to cope with a lack of sleep"  
Eren sighed softly, his mate's breath tickling as goosebumps erupted along as his arm. In the silence of their room, the gurgle Eren's stomach gave brought a smile to his face. He wasn't necessarily laughing, but the sound had been completely unexpected. In his arms, Eren pushed himself out of his hold  
"Eren?"  
"I'm going to be sick"

Doing a semi-shuffled run, Eren rushed from their room. Levi pushing back the covers completely, following his mate into the bathroom. Eren was kneeling in front of the toilet, dry heaving as nothing came up. Moving to sit behind him, Levi kissed Eren's shoulder as he rubbed his left arm, trying to offer a small measure of comfort  
"Eren, it's not healthy to be dry heaving like this. You're too exhausted to be trying to deal with this"  
Gagging and spitting, Eren's words fell between his mates desperate attempts to vomit   
"Tell that to my stomach"  
"Have you tried your pills?"  
"Threw 'em up"  
"Let me call Mike? See if he can give you a shot for the nausea and something to help you sleep?"  
"I don't want to go to hospital"  
"I'm not talking about taking you to hospital..."  
Though he was severely tempted to. Not sleeping and constant vomiting was no good for Eren, or the pups  
"... I was thinking I would explain your systems to him, and see if he can give you something to help"  
"I don't know... What if Erwin... well, you know..."  
"Mike is enough of a professional that he wouldn't allow it affect his work. Besides, I doubt he would approve of his husband's behaviour"  
"What if he comes with him?"  
"Then we let Mike in, and leave Erwin out in the hall"  
"He has keys"  
"The bolt can't be opened with keys..."  
Guiding Eren back from the toilet, his omega have a weary sigh  
"I'm so tired"  
"I can see that. Let me take care of it all, ok?"  
"I'm too tired to say no"  
Levi kissed Eren's clammy cheek  
"Good boy. I know you think you're going to be sick, but I doubt it. The only thing you're bringing up is spit and bile"  
"That's two things"  
"You know what I mean. Let's get you back to bed?"  
"I don't want to mess the bed up"  
"I can take a little mess"  
Like the putrid puddle Eren had left when he'd wound up in hospital... looping Eren's arm over his shoulder, his omega whined weakly as Levi started lifting him  
"I'm sorry"  
"You're ok. I'm here, and you're ok"  
"I just need to sleep"  
"I think we both agree on that. Why haven't you been sleeping when Viren is?"  
"I can't... I can't stop thinking"  
"That's never a safe thing"  
"You're an arsehole. Fuck... I'm tired"  
Did Eren not know he was repeating the question? Or was it for emphasis? Even if he'd asked, Eren would probably just blame it on his fatigue  
"You did the right thing coming to me"  
"I didn't want to disturb you, but I didn't know what to do, and I feel so messed up. I guess... I guess I really need a hug"  
"I will give you all the hugs you could ever want"  
"Ugh. I'm too tired to hit you"  
"If it'll make you feel better..."  
"Hugs are nicer. Even my omega's too exhausted for this shit"

Not wanting to risk calling Mike and having Erwin answer, Levi sent their friend a text asking for help with Eren's lack of sleep and vomiting. By some minor miracle, Mike was awake, promising to come check in with Eren. Undoing the bolt and chain, Levi rejoined Eren in their bedroom. Sitting in his original position, he let his omega move his head to his lap, nuzzling into Levi's leg as he got comfortable   
"Mike said he'd come round"  
"I feel bad for disturbing him"  
"He's married to Erwin. He's disturbed enough"  
"I really didn't want you two to fight"  
"I know. But what he did was wrong. He needs to sit down and think about everything"  
"You make it sound like he's a three year old"  
"Viren has better manners than him. Have things be ok?"  
"He's going back to missing you all the time, and taking it out on me. If that's what you mean?"  
"Why didn't you tell me?"  
"Because he doesn't understand what he's doing is wrong... and I'm so tired, I don't know what to say or do anymore. Besides, I needed space. I still need space. I'm just..."  
"So tired you need a little help?"  
"That makes it sound like I'm using you"  
"No. I didn't mean it like that. I don't like you feelings sick, but I do like being there for you"  
Resting his hand on Eren's hair, he didn't know what else to say. His mate was adorable. Even when they weren't talking and had this stupid distance between them, he still loved his omega. There was so much for Eren to take in. Not only the trial, but the specialist appointment in a couple of days. Perhaps it was a blessing Eren was too tired to be thinking about it. Levi had done some more online research. With the wonders of modern medicine, the pup could be aborted without harming its twin. It could also be delivered ahead of time, though the survival odds were low  
"You're too much for me"  
"I wouldn't say that. I left the door unlocked for Mike"  
"I feel bad annoying him..."  
"All I did was ask if he could come 'round, he could have said no"  
"Mmm"

 

Poked, prodded and injected, Eren was finally sleeping. Levi stroking his hair as he did, his mate finally looking relaxed and peaceful. Having brought their only dining chair in from the living area, Mike waited until Eren's was finally asleep before venturing into the Erwin matter. He'd avoided both the trial and the baby thing, while Eren was awake. Not that Eren was talking. He'd frozen when Mike walked into the room, and stayed silent right up until he fell asleep  
"Erwin didn't tell me he hadn't talked to you about the trial"  
"Aren't you two supposed to be married?"  
"So you knew?"  
"When he first brought it up, I agreed he should hold back from telling you, due to the miscarriage. What I didn't know was that he didn't talk to you about it after. Not until he came with a bruised face"  
"He deserved it"  
"I'm not saying he didn't. I assume this all came as a shock"  
Levi snorted  
"Yeah. A shock. You could say it like that. The night Eren gets out of hospital, Flock came right over and dropped all this shit in our lap. This is the most time we've spent together in the last week. He can't sleep and he keeps throwing everything up. Floch reckons he has to testify"  
"He's in no condition to testify"  
"Your opinion doesn't count. I'm hoping we can get a letter from the specialist about this. I've already told him I'll take him to whatever doctor or therapist they want us to see"  
"Does Floch know?"  
"He knows it's a high risk pregnancy, and it was clear from looking at Eren, that he can't cope with this right now. His nerves are shot to shit"  
"Floch never struck me as narrow minded"  
"Of course he's narrow minded, his head is firmly wedged up his arse"  
"Is that your medical opinion?"  
"This isn't the time for jokes"  
Mike shook his head  
"I suppose not. What can I do to help?"  
"This. Eren won't go back to hospital, unless it's kicking and screaming. He's been holed up in his room instead for the most part. He's been avoiding me, but he's too exhausted to fight right now. And if we can't keep him from testifying, it's going to be one hell of a fight"  
Mike paused, the man tugging on his jacket sleeves acting uncharacteristically nervous   
"I know you don't want to talk about it, but have you discussed..."  
"He's not having an abortion. He's already said as much"  
"He may not have a choice"  
"You're right. I don't want to talk about it"  
"Eren should be out for the next 10 to 12 hours. And you have work?"  
"I do... I'll have to take Viren in with me"  
"I can take him to Hanji's"  
"My shift's from 9 to 3"  
""She starts at 1. And I'll be on already"  
"Who's looking after Anna?"  
"I'm not sure. She usually brings her here... I'm sure we can find a sitter at the hospital"  
"Eren would love that. Viren in hospital. He wouldn't even stop to hear why, before kicking up a storm"  
Thinking about it, a knowing smile formed on his lips  
"What's with the look?"  
"I was just thinking about how the idiots on placement haven't worked with children before. They've been into the field, but they've never had to handle children before. Let alone a cranky three year old"  
"Will your boss be ok with it?"  
"I'm in charge of their training. They need to learn that dealing with a child isn't like dealing with a small adult"  
"I'm glad you're not my boss"  
"Then it's a good thing I won't be there much longer"  
"I mentioned that to Erwin. Apparently it slipped your mind to tell him"  
"I have yet to tell anyone. Other than Eren and my boss. I asked her to keep it quite"  
"And you weren't going to tell him?"  
"It must have slipped my mind, like the trial slipped his"  
"I know you two have had your disagreements..."  
Levi let out a chuckle   
"You mean. You've seen how overbearing he's become to the point where he feels the need to continually insult my life choices and my mate? I appreciated everything he did for me, but I have never appreciated his words against Eren"  
"He really does worry for you. It has caused more than one fight between us"  
"It wasn't my intention"  
"No. No. It's not you. It's him. Erwin just has a hard time letting go"  
"Are things still going well between you two?"  
"Three. Eld is back in the equation"  
"I thought you two agreed to close the relationship"  
"We did. Until... You probably don't want to hear it"  
Levi stroked Eren's hair, tucking it back behind his ear. It was getting long again. Not that he was complaining. He loved running his fingers through Eren's long hair  
"I'm not going anywhere. Besides, it's the least I could do. You did drop everything to help Eren"  
"He's been a good influence on you. You've softened since meeting you"  
"Erwin doesn't agree"  
"Erwin is rather disagreeable"  
"Are you supposed to say that about your husband?"  
"Probably not. Things have been easier with Eld around, but it doesn't feel like a real relationship with the three of us. I don't know how they make it work. No matter what happens, someone's feelings are hurt, and someone feels left out. But the sex with Eld is great"  
"I didn't need to know that"  
"All I'm saying is, you and Eren are lucky to have each other. You've both been able to help each other through your issues"  
"I know. I never thought I'd have someone like him in my life"  
"I think that's why Erwin can't understand. Before you had Eren, you had Erwin. I think he felt that he'd forever be chasing your footsteps. He also doesn't understand the bond between an alpha and an omega"  
"I never asked him to. And there a plenty of nonalpha/omega relationships"  
"Yes, but the dynamic isn't the same"  
"No two relationships are. Eren thought we were over. He seriously thought I didn't love him, and that we were done. Now, when I ask him anything about the wedding, he says he doesn't want to get married. This trial is something we really didn't need"  
"He wants to marry you. He's wanted to marry you since you two first decided to be you two. You were so good to him. You took your time to talk to him, saw him as more than an omega. Eren trusts you to make the right decisions for him. He knows you have his best interests at heart, and even when he's pushing you away, he knows you'll do the right thing... Erwin... Sometimes I can't help wish that Erwin took a leaf from your book"  
"I wouldn't say that..."  
"You didn't. I'm saying... Actually, I don't quite know what I'm saying. I wish Erwin would open up and make an actual attempt with relationship"  
"You're making it sound like being married is the worst thing imaginable"  
Erwin and Mike had been so in love at their wedding. Both men soft and gentle as they spent their reception in a world of their own... It'd only been a few months since they'd wed. How could things have possibly gone to shit so fast? The Then again, the days had been moving impossibly fast with everything happening between him and Eren... when Eren wasn't keeping his distance that is  
"No. Not the worst thing. I think for Eren, it would be the best thing that ever happened to him. It would give him security for his future"  
"I know that. But I want to marry him, because he's my whole world. Not for stupid reasons like his dynamic"  
"Yet, if something was to happen to you, the government would probably seize your assets and prevent Eren from inheriting anything"  
"I don't plan on dying any time soon"  
"You know what I mean. A bond may mean something to us, but it means nothing to anyone with that much time on their hands"  
Honestly, Levi really knew nothing about how inheritances worked. When his uncle had died, it'd only been a few weeks, and a single meeting with the man's lawyer, before the funds left to him had been moved into his account. Eren's hadn't been quite that simple, as his father hadn't been dead... but they'd still payed out... after being shot, he'd made sure his will was updated. Everything he had would be left to Eren in the event something happened to him. If something happened to both of them, it'd go to Hanji. Any money from the sale of the apartment would go to her for the care of Viren, while their money would be held in trust until Viren turned 18  
"You're a depressing arsehole, you know that, right?"  
"I didn't mean to be. And for what it's worth, I'm sorry for my husband's actions"  
"You're not to blame. Erwin had plenty of time to do the right thing, instead he was insufferable at work. Constantly brooding and biting his tongue, I guess we all know why now"

"Daddy?"  
Both Levi and Mike looked to the doorway, a very sleepy Viren was holding his teddy to his chest with one arm, while rubbing at his left eye with his free hand  
"Hey, baby. What are you doing out of bed?"  
Stumbling towards them. The boy's pyjamas pants were in danger of being pulled down each time he stepped on the hemming. Reaching Mike first, Mike went to help the boy, only for Viren to start getting grizzly  
"Viren, it's ok. It's just Uncle Mike. He came to take a look at mummy"  
"I want daddy"  
Looking down to his lap, he really didn't want to move Eren from his hold. His mate was hurting so badly that he was touch starved, he missed Eren's warmth  
"Viren, you need to sleep in your own bed tonight. Mummy's sick"  
"Mummy's always sick"  
Mike tried to calm the angry toddler  
"Viren. Your mum is having another two babies. You're going to be a big brother. He's not sick because he wants to be, it's because he's making your siblings"  
"I don't want them. I didn't do it"  
Pouting at them both, Levi sighed at his son  
"Viren, just for tonight. If you go back to bed, daddy will give you a super special treat in the morning"  
"I want to stay here!"  
"But then what am I going to do with that special treat? It'd be a shame if I couldn't give it to a good boy like you"  
"What kind of treat is it?"  
"A very special one"  
"Cooler than my bike?"  
"Nothing is cooler than your bike"  
Viren sighed  
"I miss my bike"  
Levi bit the inside of his cheek, trying to be a stern parent and failing just a little  
"If you go to bed right now, I promise I'll give you that treat when you wake up"  
Viren let out a very Eren huff, before nodding  
"Good boy. Now off to bed"  
Running out he room, Viren was forced to stop, pull his pants back up over his nappy, then continue running. The kid was an adorable mess   
"His words have gotten much better"  
"Yeah. I noticed that too. There's something's and gaps we still have to put together, but he can make his wants and needs known most of the time"  
"Well. I better head off too. If anything happens during the night, let me know. He should be fine. I would say bring him in... but we both know he doesn't want that"  
"Thank you. He really appreciates it, so do I"  
"You're both welcome. What's the point of friends if you can't message them in the middle of the night and drag them out of bed and away from their snoring partners. Make sure you get some sleep too, Levi"  
"Yeah. Late start, so I'll get a couple of hours in. Don't forget to lock the door on the way out"  
"Got it. Let me know how your students go with Viren. I don't know if they're going to find it much of a treat"  
"Hey. My son is delightful"  
Mike laughed softly  
"When he's not in a bad mood"  
"It almost sounds like you hope he will be"  
"Me. Never. Goodnight, Levi"

Left alone with Eren again, Levi rearranged them so Eren was laying with his head on the alpha chest. His stomach is as propped up by Levi's hip, with one leg pulled across Levi's lap. Things shouldn't be so bad that they had to resort to drugs for his omega to sleep, but it was relieving to know Eren would finally get some real sleep, his mate was so soft and warm, Levi unable to stop from gently rubbing his mate's swell. Even if their second pup needed a little help, he was still so proud of them. Of both pups and Eren for carrying them... he was even a little annoyed that Eren was only half way through his pregnancy. He wanted to meet his two pups. He wanted to watch them grow and develop their own tiny personalities... and fuck, he really hoped they'd look like Eren. His mate was stunning, no matter what he thought.

 

*  
Having left a note for Eren, explaining he'd be home around 3, he'd left breakfast for his mate. Levi would have liked to stay, but Viren woke up in a hyperactive mood. He'd been woken by the boy jumping on the bed, a little too close to Eren for Levi's liking. His mate hadn't moved at all, still curled into him as he snorted softly. Who would have thought snoring could be soft and adorable.

Work with Viren had been an experience. His boss hadn't been impressed until he explained how those on placement hadn't had the chance to work with a child. The two female students that seemed to have a crush on him, had gotten over it when he'd made them clean. Within 10 minutes, Viren had them wrapped around his little finger, and he was back to being called a DILF while his partner was gossiped about non-stop. If Eren was up to it, he would have loved to have brought him in to work. He would have loved to show his omega off, and rub it in their faces that Eren was the only one he'd ever be interested in... aside from the fact he was gay and they'd never stood a chance. Viren played his part perfectly. He loved the attention. Each small trip or fall had then placement students gushing over him, giving them plenty of experience with a happy toddler, and a demon child.

Eren was awake when they came home. For the first time in weeks, his fiancée was fluffing around in the kitchen. Titan sitting on the edge of the kitchen counter, watching the organised chaos caused by Eren's cooking. Giving them a small smile, Eren looked beautiful. Flour was dusted across his cheek, and down his shirt. His hair thrown up in a messy bun, but the smile was hypnotic  
"Hey... is he awake?"  
"No. He passed out in the car on the way home. I'll put him to bed then come help you"  
"I'm ok. I'm just making bread rolls. Take a shower"  
"I will, I just need to do something first"

Laying Viren down in his bed, and making sure his teddy was in his hold, Levi then headed into the kitchen. Coming up behind Eren, he wrapped his arms around his mate's stomach, kissing his shoulder as he did  
"Is this ok? You smell sleepy, did you get enough sleep?"  
Eren turned enough to kiss the side of Levi's head, before going back to the dough he was working   
"Yeah, just don't make any sudden moves. I'm still a bit tired, so it's an early night for me tonight. I've already messaged Mike and thanked him"  
"What time did you wake up?"  
"Around 2. I haven't had a shower yet. I was going to leave the dough to rise while I did. Tell me about you day"  
"Viren went over well. He had them all under his control"  
"I bet he did. Your boss wasn't mad, was she?"  
"Not once I explained that I thought it would be a great learning experience. The students don't often get a chance to work with a child. Do you mind that I took him?"  
"No. He's definitely a daddy's boy. If he's stayed, he would have had to put up with me sleeping"  
Rolling the dough into two seperate balls, Eren split them, placing them in two bowls then into the oven. Levi shuffling around, not ready to let his mate go yet   
"Now to let them poof up. I thought you were going for a shower"  
"I am. Like I said, I had something to do first and it was hugging you"  
"You're lucky I'm drugged"  
"I thought you might be feeling better..."  
"I am. Thank you. I'm sorry I came climbing into your bed like that"  
"Eren, it's our bed. And I am more than happy to have you climbing into our bed"  
"I was feeling so sick that if you'd offered me a cardboard box, I probably would have climbed into their"  
"Then I'd just have to bring that box home, and give you bath"  
Eren shook his head, his fiancée moving to turn completely towards him   
"I would kill for a bath"  
"Then why don't you take one? I'm home. I can watch Viren"  
"It seems like too much effort, and the hot water would probably just make me feel sick"  
"Have you been eating and drinking?"  
"I had a shake. I was planning on having an early dinner"  
"Do you want to come take a shower with me?"  
"I'm sorry. I'm not up for it yet"  
Levi leaned up, kissing Eren on the cheek  
"It's ok. I just thought you might... never mind"  
His face must have betrayed his disappointment. Standing in their kitchen, Eren was looking down to him so lovingly... he'd thought that maybe Eren would let him in a little, now that he was physically feeling better   
"Lee. I'm not saying I'm never going to shower with you again. I'm still try to work through my thoughts about testifying"  
"You don't have to"  
"We don't know that for sure. I was hoping we could talk about it"  
"Are you sure you want to? Your specialist appointment is coming up, and you don't need the extra stress"  
"It's because it's coming up that I need to have all the information I can... each day, it's coming closer. I don't suppose you've heard from Floch?"  
"No. As far as I'm concerned, the ball's in his court. I told him we'd see any one he wanted us to, for a second opinion"  
"I know. I was there"  
"I know you were. I don't plan on doing anything at all without talking to you about it first. If you want to take a shower first, I don't mind waiting... I don't mind waiting for you. I'll wait as long as you need me to"  
"I know you will. I'm sorry I'm taking this so badly"  
"I don't think you're taking it as badly as you could have"  
"I feel like crap about it all"  
"I wish you didn't"  
"Go take a shower. I'm making homemade burgers for dinner. I'll make you extra for work"  
"You're too good to me"  
"Lee, I love you. And baking taking my mind off things..."  
"Oh. So I'm a distraction?"  
"Yeah. But the best kind of distraction. I just hope..."  
Eren bit his lip and gave a shake of his head  
"No. What were you going to say?"  
"It's lame"  
"Tell me anyway"  
"I. Uh. I hope the buns turn out as nice as your buns. It's stupid. I'm going back to dinner"  
"You like my buns?"  
"Not if you're going to be like this"  
"You think I have a nice arse?"  
"No. You're an arsehole"  
Despite the pout on Eren's lips, he could the tips tugging as the omega tried not to smile  
"You like my booty?"  
Doing a little butt shake finally pushed Eren over the edge. His omega letting out a laugh   
"Don't ever say booty again"  
"I won't if you admit you like my arse"  
"Fine. I admit it. It's a great arse, connected to an even greater arse. Now get out of the kitchen"  
"That was too easy"  
"It was either that or you saying booty again"  
"You love my gluteus maximus"  
"I will kick your gluteus maximus if you don't start moving. And when are getting a new dining table set, or at least chairs?"  
"If we only have one chair, that means you have to sit in my lap"  
"I don't like eating while sitting on the sofa, unless it's with Viren. I don't like the crumbs"  
"Which means you should just sit in my lap"  
Shaking his head, Eren walked away. Levi had gone too far with his joking again. Grabbing the dishcloth, Eren sighed heavily  
"I'm sorry. I don't mean to be sensitive about it. Can you give me a few minute?"  
"Of course. I'm sorry for pushing"  
"No. You shouldn't have to be sorry. I think I'm going to take another nap once the bench dries, and the rolls are done. I'm too tired and my omega is playing up again"  
It was times like this that Levi loathed Eren's omega side. His mate's omega should know by now that he was in a safe place and anything that Eren told him would never change the feelings he had for them. He knew Eren struggled with accepting his secondary dynamic, which meant a part of him wondered if this was revenge by his omega from not embracing his dynamic fully. Anything and everything Eren could ever want, he'd give freely and completely. His reward and greatest happiness came in a form of a blinding smile and the purest of joy that would radiate from his mate. It was like a drug, and he was hopelessly addicted  
"I can finish up here. You should rest"  
"I'll do it. All I've done is sleep"  
"Because you needed it. You still look exhausted. Beautiful, but exhausted"  
"If I take a nap, will you wake me in an hour?"  
Nope. He'd leave him to sleep  
"I can do that"  
"Lee. I don't want to sleep too much and not be able to sleep tonight"  
That really wasn't going to be an issue, he could tell just by looking at Eren   
"I know. How about I check in on you? If you're too tired to get up, I'll leave you sleeping  
Eren mumbled, tugging at his shirt hem as he did  
"Getting up hasn't been a problem..."  
"What was that?"  
"Nothing. Just pregnancy stuff..."  
Kissing him sweetly, Eren headed towards their room. While his omega's comment finally made it down to his dick... That horny little shit... great. Now he was definitely going to need a cold shower to get the image of a hard and slick Eren out his mind.

 

*  
Climbing into Levi's bed, Eren was out the moment his head hit the pillow. His omega had been constantly buzzing in the back of his mind, telling him that Levi had taken Viren and left him for good. He'd thrown himself into cooking to distract himself from his rising doubts over Levi coming home. He didn't want to keep his mate away... but there was just so many things in his mind. 

Sleeping like the dead, he should have felt refreshed. His dreams were of Levi and Viren. For some reason they were on a cruise on a massive cruise liner. The whole thing was amazing, until it went the way of his usual dreams. Levi and Viren were both wearing tuxedos, their son's hair combed back to perfection as Levi carried him on his hip, their smiles so wide he was filled with more affection than he knew what to do with . The cruise liner crashing into a field of ice, the ship lurching sideways, and separating him from Levi and Viren as he was thrown into the frigid water. Sinking, all he could were other people sinking too. Trying to breathe, he swallowed down lungful after lungful of the salt water, his ears ringing with the pressure as he tried to fight his way up. He had to get back to Levi and Viren... yet all he did was sink. It didn't matter how many times he kicked his legs, or waved his arms like a moron, the sliver of light above him grew to nothing... watching as he sank, suddenly an arm reached down towards him. Grabbing the hand, he was pulled to the surface, only they weren't in the ice field anymore. He was in the bathtub at home, Reiner and Bertholdt standing over him. Pulled from bathtub, he was just about to hit the floor...

Waking with a desperate gasp, Eren's heart was still racing as he came back to reality. Fuck. Fucking stupid dreams. It'd been so nice to begin with, and now it was rushing to slip away while leaving the lingering fear with it. Fucking wanker. Driving the heels of his palms into his eyes, he groaned at himself. Reiner and Bertholdt were gone. They weren't coming back. Dead and gone. Between his legs was wet with slick, and the throbbing in his dick wasn't something one would associate with a nightmare like that. He'd woken up just as horny the first time, ignoring it until he finally calmed down. It was because he was Levi's room, surrounded by his alpha's scent, but with Reiner and Bertholdt front and centre in his mind... he couldn't deal with the right now. Rolling back over, he curled around his stomach. He could feel the movements of the pups, and if Levi knew, he'd be right there hoping to feel the same. Nuzzling into the pillow beneath his head, he made a grievous error as Levi's scent filled his nose. Fuck... his alpha smelt so fucking good. The gasp that escaped his lips as a thick blob of slick gushed from him, was completely unwanted. His body was so confused. He'd been dreaming about Reiner and Bertholdt, now he was dripping with slick and ready to be mounted. He needed to be thinking about Levi. Levi was his alpha... not... those two... did... was this cheating? He couldn't control his dreams, but he'd woken up like this... even after dreaming about the pair of them... he'd... he was horny and thinking about two other alpha's... a long miserable whine slipped from his throat. Levi would be angry... he was his omega. He belonged to him. He didn't have anyone else. Levi and Viren were his family and this was his home. What did he do if Levi changed his mind about him? He wanted his alpha to want him. He knew he was hurting Levi each time a touch was too much. He didn't want to hurt him...

"Eren"  
Pulled up from his protective ball, Eren continued to whine for his alpha as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed. He couldn't breathe, but he sure as hell could whine without realising he'd continued to do so  
"Eren. I'm here. You're ok. You're safe"  
Cupping his face in his hands, Levi rubbed his cheeks with the pads of his thumbs   
"You're ok. It was just a dream. You're ok. Come on, breath in through your nose and out through your mouth for me"  
The moment he could follow Levi's directions, he threw his arms around his alpha, starting to sob in earnest  
"Please don't get rid of me. I didn't mean to dream about them"  
"Shhh... shh... you're ok. No one is getting rid of anyone"  
"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to"  
"It was just a dream"  
"I feel like I cheated on you... I didn't want to dream about them. I didn't... I hate this stupid body!"  
"Eren, it was a dream. A stupid dream. You didn't cheat on me. I know you wouldn't... you need to calm down for me"  
"I'm sorry... I'll be good. Just let me show you"  
"You're already good. So good to me..."  
Clutching Levi, Eren cried his stupidity out onto his alpha's shoulder. He shouldn't need Levi to soothe him like this. He was 24, soon to be 25. He was a grown adult male with a loving mate. Not the kid who'd been abandoned by everyone  
"Shhhh. I love you"  
"I love you too, Lee... I love you. I don't love them"  
"I know you don't, I know. I've got you"

Crying himself out, he sniffled sadly. Each sob had sent more slick spilling. His whole lower half felt gross from it. His head felt gross from crying, while his back was sore from leaning into Levi. Sitting back, he let out a pathetic whine. His lip trembling as he looked to Levi, ashamed to mumble   
"I've slicked"  
"Do you want some help cleaning up?"  
He couldn't stomach the idea of showering with his mate, and yet Levi was still trying to help him. He didn't want to think about Reiner and Bertholdt... and he knew how good Levi's hands could feel... even when he wasn't in the mood. He was such a hypocrite. Don't touch me. Touch me more. Give me attention when I want it, then go away. And Levi... Levi was looking at him like he was the most precious thing in the world. No. He didn't want to be touched, but he also didn't not want to be touched. Hating himself, he nodded.

Lifted off the bed by his mate, Levi carried him into the bathroom. His alpha letting out a moan as he pulled down Eren's pyjama bottoms and underwear. The smell of slick and arousal filled the room. He could see Levi was affected. His alpha's pupils were wide as he licked his lips, before realising what he was doing   
"I'll start the shower for you"  
Would it really be that bad to have Levi mount him? He was soaking wet and... he wasn't them. Turning, he placed both hands on the bathroom counter. Taking a deep breath breath as he did  
"Eren? The shower's over here"  
"I know... I just need a minute"  
"Hey. You don't have to force yourself. I can go"  
"No! No... Lee, I don't know what to do. I don't want to think about them, but they're in my dreams. My body has decided to betray me like this. I don't want to be touched, but all I can think about is you touching me and getting rid of the memories of them. I don't know what I want. I don't know"  
"Do you trust me?"  
Eren nodded as he sniffled   
"Good. Come here"

He hadn't even noticed Levi had stripped. Guided into the shower, Levi wrapped an arm around him, crooning softly as he did. Nudging his thighs apart, Levi slipped his hand down, taking his dick as his continued to croon to soothe him. With his forehead on Levi's shoulder, he gasped softly at the feeling, before moaning as Levi began to jerk him off. It didn't take long before Eren came, the orgasm leaving him melting against Levi. Nuzzling and peppering kisses to his hair, Levi softly praised him. His alpha holding him tenderly until he could finally stand unaided. Cleaning his body down, Levi started by washing his hair and working his way down. It felt like his mate had found every single muscle knot and sore spot, working them until the tension eased. With his forehead against the tiles, Eren was pretty sure Levi wasn't actually getting him cleaned up. He could feel each flutter as more slick was expelled from body, but Levi never made to act on it. Even when he finally cleaned down his slick, the worst the alpha did was press a kiss to his butt cheek and tell him how perfect he was.

Helped from the shower, Levi wrapped him in his towel, before fetching clothes for him. Drying his hair down, his mate again pressed kisses to his hair between the movement of the towel. Eren felt the most relaxed he had since coming out of hospital, that a purr began to rumble from his chest. Levi ignored the purring in favour of helping him dress. The alpha still wearing just as towel around his waist as he carried him through to his old bedroom, rather than their room. Laying him down, Levi stroked the side of his face, before tucking his wayward hair back  
"You're my everything, Eren. You're confused and you're hurting, but you haven't given up. I love you"  
"I love you too... thank you. I'm sorry I can't figure out what I want or need"  
"Eren, it's fine. Dinner will be ready in about half an hour. Viren was cranky when he woke up, so I put him back to bed. Do you want me to wake you?"  
"Um... can... you maybe stay?"  
"You want me to stay?"  
"I don't want to have another bad dream"  
Rolling away from Levi, Eren wriggled towards the middle of the bed. It took a few moments before Levi joined him, spooned up and holding him close  
"Is this ok?"  
"Y-yes... thank you"  
"I'll always be here for you, my Shitty Brat"  
"My Arsehole of an Alpha"  
Feeling for his hand, Levi interlaced their fingers once he found it. If he knew he wanted Levi, why couldn't everything else fall into place?


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I promised to edit this, but like my house and my car, the computer my friend gave me to use decided it needed die... so now, I'm living in house falling apart as even though the damage wasn't noted when we brought it, it's not covered by insurance. A car that breaks down every few months, and a computer that I didn't even do anything, to that won't boot... and as the house is through a government scheme for low income earners, I can't even remortgage to pay for the repairs. I'm an okish person... is this karma for making Eren suffer?!
> 
> Sighs dramatically...
> 
> I was asked to give our boys a break, and there was need for intimacy... so ya all got both...
> 
> Also. I have had no medical training outside of basic first aid. So I apologise for butchering the medical and legal system...
> 
> My third also  
> I love you all. Writing is what keeps me going. I have a mind that doesn't shut up. It fixates on a task then doesn't allow me to sleep until I get it out my system. Lately it's been planning the garden I would have if I had about a zilliion years. My ultimate dream is to own a small farm and fill it with trees from all over the world...

Despite being pregnant, Eren's body had tried to send him into heat. They'd talked a little over the photographs, until Eren had shut down, murmuring that he needed to testify, before leaving the dining room table. His mate taking himself to bed, locking himself away, and leaving Levi with a sick sense of worry as he left for work again. Eren still locked away when he came home, and wasn't up come morning. He knew Eren would take care of Viren, but with his specialist appointment the following day, he didn't want the omega under any unnecessary stress, so called Hanji. Hanji happy to take Viren for the night, which would give Eren some space to breathe and prepare himself.

 

When he came home from work that night, Eren came striding out. He didn't pause before pushing his lips to Levi's, growling into his mouth as he tried to pull him closer. Led into Eren's room, his mate was almost frenzied he pushed him into nest and begged him to mount him. Levi tried to be gentle, yet after cleaning him up, he'd been stuck with simmering desire in the base of his stomach. Eren didn't really want this, he knew that, but his mate wouldn't take no for an answer. Leaving him alone in his room Levi fled back to their room, closing the door and sitting with his back to it as Eren started pounding against it, sobbing for him. He wanted to cave in, and to soothe his mate until he was purring mess, but that wasn't what Eren really needed right now. It was a small eternity before Eren finally stopped knocking, Levi wrecked with guilt over doing the responsible adult thing. He could have given in. He wanted to give in, but they'd talked about it. Eren wasn't ready and he respected his omega's wishes... even if they really fucking sucked.

Falling asleep against the door, he woke with a stiff back and a crink in his neck. Fuck. He hadn't meant to fall asleep. He'd supposed to just stay there until Eren went to his room, then he was supposed to check in with his omega. Dragging himself off the floor, he felt revolting. His clothes stuck to him with sweat, and in all the wrong places. Shit. Today was going to be hard enough without him looking like shit. He needed a shower, and roughly 12 extra strong cups of tea.

Eren's door was closed, so Levi showered first. He didn't want to wake his mate, only to abandon him again. Trying the handle, his mate's door was unlocked. Eren's bed has been transformed into a lavish nest, with all of his blankets and pillows gathered, and though wrecked, it was clear he'd taken his time to thoroughly prepare it. Amidst the messof blankets, Eren's hair was poking out. A mess he itched to straighten up for him, but he didn't dare. He knew better than to violate the sanctity of his mate's nest. Instead he sat on the edge of it, not entering without being invited. Shaking Eren's shoulder, he woke his love, Eren trying to hide in his blankets with a long groan. He reaching out, Eren snaked an arm around his waist  
"Eren, we have to get up"  
"Noooo. Sleepy"  
"Your appointment's today"  
"I'm not moving"  
Clinging to him tightly, it seemed Eren didn't want him moving either   
"Eren, I know you don't want to move, but if you don't want to go to your appointment covered in slick and cum, you kind of have to"  
His words caused Eren to release him, his omega shifting back from his a scent filling with guilt as he pulled his blanket down over his face   
"Shhh... hey. It's ok"  
"I... fuck... heat"  
"As eloquent as always, but yes, your body tried to send you into heat"  
"I'm sorry"  
"No. It's ok. But are you ok?"  
"I feel wrecked"  
"Are you mad?"  
"No... I probably would have been feeling even worse... uh. Thank you"  
"I've already had a shower, so take your time. I'll make breakfast"  
"Am I allowed to eat?"  
Levi drew his brow in confusion   
"Why wouldn't you be?"  
"I don't know how these appointments work"  
"Today we meet with the specialist and then we'll discuss our options. They won't be doing anything today"  
"Are you sure?"  
"I'm sure. Are you coming out of your nest?"  
"I don't want to move. I'm beached"  
"I'm not coming in there to pull you out. This is your nest"  
"I think I'm literally beached... I have the stuck. Just leave me here"  
"I'm not leaving you in here"  
"Fiiiine. You're going to have to leave though. Things under here are a mess"  
"Ok. Just call out for me if you need help"  
"Mmm... ok..."  
"I love you "

Coming out the bathroom in time for their scrambled eggs to be fresh from the pan, his mate had looked lost as he gazed across the apartment   
"Where's Viren?"  
"He's with Hanji. I thought you could use the rest before today, and we'll pick him up on the way home"  
"Oh..."  
"I thought you could use the rest"  
"You said... it's... I miss him"  
"It's only for a few hours, then we'll pick him up. I don't have to go in until after your appointment"  
"Are you sure? I could go alone"  
"You're not going alone. You're my mate and they're our children. I'm going to be holding your hand every step of the way"  
"Are you sure you really want to see them? It... doesn't look great"  
"I've seen the scans Eren. I know what we've gotten into and we'll figure out what's best for our pups. Why don't you sit? I'll bring breakfast over to you"  
Eren looked slightly guilty as he curled up on the recliner. Titan coming running to him, the cat had been in Viren's room  
"I don't like not sitting at the dining table. It doesn't feel right"  
"When I get a day off, we'll all go together and choice something. We need to start picking up things for the pups"  
"I... think we should wait"  
"Why?"  
This wasn't going to turn out like the whole wedding fiasco was it? I still wanted to marry Eren, but the trial had driven it from his mind. Though it was a little surprising that Eren hadn't found the ring yet, given the amount of cleaning he liked to do  
"In case they make me abort"  
"No can make you abort"  
"I'm an omega. They can literally force me to"  
"And I'm telling you they can't"  
Carrying his breakfast over, Levi snagged the coffee table with foot to pull it closer to Eren, before placing it down and lifting Titan from Eren's hold  
"Good god, you've got fat"  
"He's not fat. He's fluffy"  
"Then we need to start shaving him and selling his fur off"  
"He's perfect as he is"  
"He's a fatty. I bet the moment I place him down, he's going to run for his food"  
"I'm not taking that bet. I wish the hardest part of my day was jumping on the kitchen counter"  
"No one is stopping you from jumping on the kitchen counter"  
"That seems like effort. If I jump on the counter, do I still have to go?"  
"You do... its better to know everything than just worrying about it"  
"I hate when you're right"  
"I know, now eat your breakfast then we'll head in"

 

*  
Eren fell silent as they sat in the waiting room. They'd been sent for an ultrasound, which Eren hadn't been able to handle. His omega had taken one look at their pups, then closed his eyes as silent tears formed. The tumour had clearly grown, though both pups were still alive. Both their little heartbeats filled the room, sent Eren into a meltdown. His hold on his hand grew limp, Eren turning his face from the direction of the screen, while the woman performing the scan tried to reassure them that Eren was in good hands, and offered her sympathy over what they were going through. He supposed he could understand that Eren didn't want to get more attached to them, when he could lost them, but he knew it was too late for Eren to putting those particular walls up. His mate loved the pups, just as much as he did. In the end, his fiancée kept his eyes closed until the technician finally wiped gel off his stomach and they were sent back up to the fourth floor to wait.

Like everything in life, the wait is usually worse than the actual appointment. Holding Eren's hand, he pressed kisses to the back of it, having realised that Eren was going to be answering any of questions any time soon. By the time Eren's name was called, they'd already been waiting for over an hour. Eren had been to the bathroom twice in that time, returning and looking paler each time he did. His scent was verging on panic, leaving all the alphas on edge as Levi led him over to the man that had called them through. They'd both thought they'd be taken into the consultation room, but instead, Eren's vitals were taken, as was his previous medical history and the complications during his first pregnancy. Levi was left to answer, while Eren stared down at his stomach. Once the short examination was over, they were sent back to the waiting room for another half an hour long wait. This time when Eren's name was called, his fiancée's knees gave out when he stood. Looping his arm around Eren's waist, Levi kept him propped up until Eren finally took a small step  
"I'm here. I've got you"  
Giving a curt nod, the pair of them made their way back into the hall they'd followed the nurse into before. This time, they were led past the nurses office, then another four doors down. 

Sitting behind her desk, the specialist was already waiting. The woman was on the youthful side of old. The roots of her hair were peppered with grey hairs, while her face was relatively wrinkle free. Rising from behind her desk, she gestured to the two chairs in front of it  
"Hello, I'm Doctor Reed. Please take a seat"  
Levi moved his chair closer to Eren's, his mate sitting down and immediately trying to curl into himself. Placing his hand on Eren's thigh, he squeezed softly  
"So. Which one of you is Eren?"  
Eren didn't get the joke, raising his hand slightly to indicate he was  
"Sorry. Just a little humour. Now, I understand this is your second pregnancy, and you've also suffered through a partial miscarriage. It's my job to make sure this little pup lives to meet his parents, and I'm going to my very best to make that happen. I can't make any promises, and I won't. Not all pups survive this, and not all mothers survive the birth. Now that I've got the scary talk out the way, I'm going to have give you a quick examination, then we'll talk about your options. Are you able to hop up on that examination table for me?"  
Reed smiled at them, while Eren looked to him  
"It's ok. I'm not going anywhere"  
"I wouldn't dream of asking your alpha to leave, and I promise all I wish to examine is your stomach"  
She was good with him. Levi was quietly impressed by her soothing tone. He supposed this wasn't her first dance   
"See. I'm not going anywhere"  
Nodding his consent, Levi fussed over Eren as he walked over to the examination table, Levi helping him up  
"Excellent"  
Snapping on a pair of blue plastic gloves, the woman moved to Eren's side  
"Let me know if you feel any discomfort, pain or pressure"  
Nodding, Eren squeezed his hand.

There were a couple of times that Eren whispered "there", but the woman didn't look terribly phased by it. She was still smiling as she stripped off her gloves   
"Alright. I hope that wasn't terrible. You can take a seat again, take your time to gather your feet under you"  
Mumbling a thanks, Levi "helped" Eren off the table and back to sit. Washing her hands and retaking her seat, she opened the file marked with Eren's name   
"Now. You're 20 weeks along... ok. Right. I see... Eren are you able to provide me with a full medical history? I'd like to hear it from you"  
Eren looked to him with pleading eyes  
"Eren has high anxiety levels. I know his medical history, so would you mind if I filled you in?"  
"Eren, do you mind if Levi speaks on your behalf?"  
"He... can say it better"  
"Alright, Eren. Levi, if you will"  
Starting with Eren's unpredictable heats, Levi hoped Eren didn't mind him getting too personal. It was for the good of their pup that the woman knew as many details as possible. As the talked, she took a few notes, flicking between pages in Eren's file as she did.

The whole time Levi was talking, he was wishing she'd explain what she saw on the scan. Eren was one long moment away from breaking down, but it didn't stop her from making them wait another small eternity once he'd finished explaining everything, though he had left Eren's trip to Karanes out of it... the realisation that his mate's life, and the life of the pups, was in the hands of a woman he knew nothing about set his alpha on edge, causing him to grind his teeth before catching himself doing so   
"Ok. Now, have you been told what a Sacrococcygeal teratomas is?"  
"We have..."  
"Basically it's a big tumour right here... at the base of the spine"  
Taking a pen and piece of paper, she drew a very rough diagram, pointing to an alarmingly big sac  
"There are four types of tumour. Looking at your scans, I would be inclined to agree it's a type one, but there is only so much we can see in a scan. When you admitted into hospital, the growth measured 11 millimetres, which is a fair size for a pup so small, the grown now measures a little over 15 millimetres, so it's still growing"  
Looking down to her file, she flicked through a few pages   
"The biopsy results show the tumour to benign, which is a good thing"  
Flicking back through her pages, Levi resisted the urge to rip the file from her hands as she did  
"I see an abortion was recommended"  
"He's not having an abortion"  
"Eren can speak for himself. As I was saying, I see an abortion was recommended, and I can see why. At the moment, that pup is trying his hardest to grow, but with the rich blood supply of the tumour, more energy is going to the tumour, causing his heart to work even harder to keep up with it. Heart failure is common in cases like this, as is the risk of miscarriage and early labour. There has already been a thickening his placenta, as well as signs of excess fluid. It's going to be a hard pregnancy, but if we can get you through to your 30th week, I believe you all have an excellent chance. Of course, a caesarean will be necessary, followed by surgery immediately following birth. There are other things we can do, but for now, waiting is the best option. They're still a little too young for me to be recommending the surgery route. You also need to be prepared to abort. I know you don't want an abortion, and I know it's a difficult decision, but there is only a finite amount of space in Eren's womb, the tumour may only be on pup, but it may lead to complications with the second"  
30 weeks seemed like a life time... especially when Eren was having so much trouble already... now the choice to continue the pregnancy could cost them both pups... He... what the hell was he supposed to say to that. A risk of miscarriage. A risk of early labour. A risk of losing both pups and a risk of losing Eren. His tiny world they'd made together was shattering around him. His alpha was urging him to grab Eren and to flee before the woman could drop any more bad news on their lap.

After a few moments, Levi found his voice again. Eren had said he needed to testify after looking at the photos, but after hearing all of that, he couldn't let him. He wanted to lock him in their apartment and never let him out  
"Eren has been called to give evidence in a trial. Will he be able to do that?"  
"I certainly wouldn't recommend it. Pregnancy is hard enough, a pregnancy with complications more so. Too much stress on you and your pups could lead to all kinds of complications"  
"Are you able to write us a recommendation that he doesn't take the stand? The officer in charge of the case will only take a statement from an impartial physician"  
"One look at his current medical state should tell any trained professional that he is not in the right frame of being to be giving a testimony"  
"Unfortunately they tend to hold the fact that Eren is an omega over him"  
Moving back to the first page of Eren's file, Reed read as she spoke  
"Yes. That is unfortunate. Now. Eren, we will be monitoring the tumour growth over the coming weeks. As I work on a rotation basis, I'll schedule you in for 4 weeks from today. 4 millimetres is a fair amount of growth, despite being so small to us. I want you to have another ultrasound in two weeks time, then a 3-dimensional ultrasound before you come to see me again. If you begin experiencing pain or bleeding, do not ignore it. You may still have sex, you no doubt by now feel effects of pregnancy, and the scent of a heat lingers on you. If we are forced to perform an emergency caesarean, or surgery upon the pup, it will take time to heal, so for now, make the most of being able to be intimate with your partner"  
Eren blushed beautifully at her words  
"Eren has always had unconventional heats. With the stress attempting to send him into heat, will it harm the pups"  
"An omegas heat is dependent on their mood, as well as their biology. It is important to make sure he feels comfortable and safe, a heat out of synch means they're crying out for comfort. Nesting will help, so nest as much as you like. There's absolutely no detrimental effects from nesting. There are mood stabilisers that can be prescribed, but there is a chance of side effects which may accelerate tumour growth. If the stress and pressure get to be too much, I would recommend talking to your normal physician about it. Long term use of sedatives are not recommended due to their addictive nature"  
He knew that all too well. That's part of the reason he hated dosing Eren unless completely necessary  
"Then for now, we just wait?"  
"I know it's a hard thing to do. But you're in this together"  
Turning to her laptop that was pushed to the side, Reed fell silent as she tapped away on the keyboard. Whatever she was doing, only took a few moments to finish before she printed it. Signing in multiple places, she passed the small tree over to him  
"One letter. I've listed the medical history you provided to our intake nurse, as well as my own conclusions from your scans, Eren. Computers are marvellous like that. Whether you use it is up to you. I strongly believe Eren should not take the stand in his current condition"  
Pushing her chair back, the woman rounded her desk as she bristly walked towards the door. Levi and Eren both standing to move towards the door of the room, Eren's hand firmly in his as they did   
"It was lovely to meet both of you"  
"You too. And thank you for seeing us"  
"And I'll you both again in four weeks time"

 

Eren was glued to his side as they walked through the hospital and down to Levi's RangeRover. Standing beside the passenger door, Eren didn't seem to want to let him go. Raising Eren's hand to kiss the back of it, his omega let out a soft sigh   
"It was a lot"  
"It was more than a lot. I... I didn't know the other pup could be affected"  
"That's a worse case scenario"  
"Why is this happening?"  
A kiss on the back of the hand wasn't going to cut it. Pulling Eren into a hug, he nuzzled into his omega's neck. Eren was so very confused   
"I don't know. But for now, we wait"  
"I don't want to wait. I want the pup to be ok"  
"You heard what she said, they're still a little too small for surgery right now"  
"I don't care... they're hurting and I can't do anything"  
"You're doing plenty"  
"God. This was so much easier before I knew it was twins... before I knew it was... it was supposed to be more than twins"  
Eren's voice was cracking with emotions, yet as his mate began to nuzzle him back, he felt no tears  
"Don't give up on them yet. If they're anything like you, they'll be as stubborn as hell"  
"You always say I'm stubborn about all the wrong things"  
"Wanna know a secret? You might be stubborn as hell and drive me up the wall from time to time, but I love that stubborn streak of yours. It makes me so fucking proud that you dig your heels in, or you fight for what you believe is right"  
"So the next time you tell me off for being stubborn, I can ignore you"  
"No. That's why it's called a secret, you're not supposed to know"  
Eren kissed the crook of his neck  
"It's a good secret. I'll let you keep it. I've got one of my own"  
Levi was sure if he looked inside Eren's brain, he wouldn't find just one secret in there  
"Oh? What is that?"  
"I love you, Lee. And I love winding you up"  
"I knew it!"  
"Mmm. But don't tell Levi I told you"  
"Pfft. Like I'd do that. I love you too, Eren. Let's drop this letter into Floch, then pick up our son"  
"I miss him"  
"I know you do. I'm sorry I can't stay this afternoon"  
"It's alright. Work is important"  
"And yet, I would rather be here with you"  
"She said I need to be more affectionate"  
"You're affectionate enough"  
"If I was, I wouldn't be trying to go into heat. Maybe you should just force yourself on..."  
"I am not going to force myself on you. You my mate, not just some I sleep with. We'll start slow. Cuddles on the sofa. Sleeping next to each other. That kind of thing"  
"I know I smell good to you"  
"Then I'll jerk off. You're too important to me"  
"And what am I supposed to do?"  
"Do about what?"  
"When I'm..."  
"Oh. When you're horny?..."  
Slipping his hands down to Eren's arse, Levi gave a firm squeeze   
"You think of me"  
"Don't I always? What I mean is... I want to be able to touch you too. As it is, I owe you two hand jobs in the shower"  
"You don't owe me anything, but if you really want to make it up to me... I know how you can do that"  
"How?"  
"Give me a kiss and we'll call it even"  
Eren kissed his shoulder  
"There"  
"I had that coming, didn't I?"  
"Mmm, maybe a little. Let's go get Viren. I really want to hold him"  
"Do I get another kiss?"  
Eren kissed his shoulder again  
"You're a shit"  
"So you tell me"  
Pulling back from Eren's neck, Eren had a soft smile on his lips. Leaning in, Levi was finally given his kiss. A real kiss, and the deepest one they'd shared for days. Breaking the kiss, his omega pushed him back  
"We need to pick our son up, and I am not going anywhere near Floch, not anymore than I have to"  
"That's fine with me"

 

*  
Viren was in a foul mood. He'd been in a foul mood for Hanji, yet had not so kindly saved his tantrum for the drive home. Levi couldn't get what was wrong out of their son, and asking only lead to more screaming. By the time Levi pulled into his usual parking place, Eren was ready to admit that maybe they should have left him at Hanji's to cry it out. He hadn't had much sleep the previous night, and with a cranky son, he doubted Viren would want to lay in bed and snuggle like he did.

Levi carried Viren up to their apartment, the boy still screaming as they went. Eren couldn't help but wonder what their neighbours thought of them. Probably that they were the worth parents in the world. Opening the apartment for his fiancée and son, Levi carried Viren through to his bedroom, reemerging a moment later without their son. Coming running out the room, Levi scooped Viren back up and disappeared again, this time closing their son's door when he came back out  
"You do know that's not going to help"  
"Just keep putting him back to bed"  
"Looking at you. Dealing with tantrums like a pro"  
"I learned from the best. Will you be alright with him?"  
Walking across the room, Levi was off to get dressed for work. Trailing after him into Levi's room, Eren dropped down on the edge of his alpha's bed, his fingers brushing over the beautiful blue blanket Levi had gifted him. He hadn't wanted it to get messy in his nest  
"I do love you, you know"  
Stripping off his shirt, Eren felt a small thrill as he watched the way Levi's muscles rippled. Smiling at him over his shoulder, it was like his alpha saw right through him  
"I love you too, and you don't have to force yourself into anything you don't want"  
With a screaming toddler the mood was hardly right. Maybe it was the fact the specialist had said he could have sex, or the lingering touches of heat, but he found himself squirming as he slicked  
"I... with you. I know"  
Leaning back, Eren placed one hand on his swell, rubbing his stomach lightly. Enjoying the show as Levi stripped off his pants  
"I can smell you"  
"It's not my fault. You're gorgeous. You know that, right?"  
"If you keep this up, I'm not going to make it work"  
"I'm not doing anything. Anything other than admiring you. I was so scared today... I was so sure she'd tell me to abort on the spot. But you were there"  
Levi sighed softly, moving towards him and dropping his uniform on the bed before finally kneeling down in front of him. Wrapping his arms around him, Levi kissed his swollen stomach  
"I was scared too. You were so quite, I was sure you were going to break down, but you didn't. You listened and responded, without losing control or panicking. It made me so proud"  
Continuing to nuzzle and kiss his swell, Eren moved his hand from his stomach to rest on Levi's hair   
"She gave me hope... more hope than I had. And she wasn't what I expected. She didn't use big words I didn't understand, and she made sure to ask me things. She even told you off... it made me feel more like a person than just an omega"  
Ruffling Levi's hair, he didn't want his mate to leave. His nest was big enough for him and Levi, and for cuddles with Viren... even if their boy was angry  
"You are more than an omega. And yeah. I liked the fact she wasn't up herself"  
"Not everyone is"  
"No. But... never mind. Mike referred us to a great specialist"  
"He did. Do you want me to make dinner tonight?! Or do you want to bring something home?"  
"After today, with your heat, and Viren's tantrum, and the appointment, I think you definitely deserve a special treat. Name it, and I'll bring it home"  
"Hmmm. How about you?"  
Levi laughed, pressing kisses to Eren's stomach as he did  
"I'm coming home, and I'm when you're ready, I'll let you eat me as much you want. But I was thinking more along the lines of food"  
Resting his chin on his stomach, Levi looked up at him  
"Pizza would be nice. Home made pizza never tastes quite the same"  
"Pizza. I can do that"  
"Mmm. I could totally go for a beer too"  
"That I can't do"  
"I know. I was just thinking out loud. I think I'm going to clean my nest up. Would you like to... sleep in it with me?"  
"Are you sure?"  
The specialist had encouraged closeness and nesting, so he was kind of obeying doctor's orders. Even if he was nervous about it, he needed to take another step towards fixing his and Levi's relationship   
"I want to... I mean. I want to try to calm down and figure out my headspace"  
"How about you ask me again tonight? If you feel the same, I would love to. It's a very impressive nest. If you want, you can take this blanket"  
"No. I don't want anything to happened to it. Besides, if you stay... you'll keep me warm, won't you?"  
"Yeah. I love you..."  
Levi kissed the left side of his stomach  
"And you...  
His mate kissed the right side  
"And you. And I'm going to brave Viren to tell him I love him too"  
Levi released him, kissing the top of Eren's head  
"I don't want to go to work"  
"Well... if you go to work like that, they might just send you home again"  
Levi looked down at his lack of clothes  
"Why? Don't you think I can save lives like this?"  
"I don't know. The way you're making my race and the way you take my breath away... you might just be the death of me"  
"Shitty Brat. Couldn't you have said "No ones allowed to look at you, except for me"?"  
"There's that too. I love you, and stay safe"  
"You too"  
"Me?"  
"You have a screaming toddler..."  
"Yeah... that's true. I'll see you later tonight"

 

*  
Hanji tried messaging to him ask if Viren had settled, then not so subtly about his appointment. Curled in the corner of the sofa with Titan in his lap, Eren was just too tired to reply. Viren has screamed and screamed, and then threw himself on the floor after pulling out everything he could from his drawers and toy box. When the toddler finally fell asleep crying, Eren moved him to his bed, which lasted for a few hours. Then dinner and bath time had been a painful fiasco, followed by another tantrum. Tomorrow they'd clean the boy's room together, and talk about why this kind of behaviour wasn't ok. For tonight, he just wanted to spend some more time with his alpha.

Dozing on the sofa, he missed Levi coming in. Waking when his alpha gently took his face in his hands. Nuzzling into Levi's cool touch, he smile at his alpha   
"Hey, you"  
"Hey yourself. I didn't want to wake you, but I didn't want to freak you out by moving you from the sofa"  
"No. I'm happy you did. I tried to wait up for you"  
"You didn't have to"  
"I did. You promised pizza"  
Levi chuckled. He loved it when his mate laughed. There was just something so fulfilling about knowing he could make him happy   
"I have pizza. Why don't you wash your face and I'll get things organised"  
"You are the best alpha in the world"  
"If I'd known you that was all it took, I'd buy you pizza every night"  
"And then I'd get fat... fatter. I already feel fat enough"  
"You're pregnant and you're prefect. Other than that drool down your face"  
"Way to ruin the moment"  
"Go wash up"

Levi had taken his words a step further than he'd thought his mate would. His alpha bringing home non-alcoholic beer, along with three different pizzas that were loaded with all the grease and cheese he could ever need. Cuddled up with a bad horror movie on, his mind wasn't racing, both the trial and the pup's complications pushed aside. He was just too tired to care about anything other than how warm Levi felt with his arm around his shoulder, and one hand splayed protectively over his stomach. The man's fingertips lightly digging into his skin, in a way that was more comforting than annoying  
"You awake?"  
"Mmm, no"  
"Good. Me neither"  
"The bed is so far away"  
"I'll carry you"  
"Ok... I'm really sleepy"  
"My bed or yours?"  
"Mine... I want to nest with you"  
"And I getting Viren?"  
"No. His tantrum lasted for hours, and he stabbed me in the leg with his fork"  
"He did what?"  
"Shhh... it's ok. It was only a little stab"  
"A "little stab" isn't ok"  
"It was with a toddler fork. It barely broke the skin. We'll be cleaning his room up tomorrow, and talking about how it wasn't acceptable behaviour"  
"Tell me you dressed it, at least"  
"I used some cream on it. It didn't need a dressing"  
He regretted trying to make a joke of it. Levi's scent was filling with muted worry  
"I'm really ok, Lee. Let's just go to bed"  
"I want to see it"  
"Lee"  
"I want to see"  
"Fine. You can look when we go to bed. But we actually have to move to you know, go to bed"

Swept up into Levi's arms, his alpha stopped by the bathroom first, so he could pee and brush his teeth, before his alpha insisted on lifting him by his arse and carrying him into his old room. Laying him down in his nest, Levi blinded him by flicking the bedside lamp on. Grabbing his pillow, he hid his face from the offending light  
"Let's get you out these pants"  
"I don't know, they're pretty comfy"  
His stupid hormones were responding to every touch from his alpha. Stripping down his pants, Levi ran his finger over the small stab site   
"It's bruised"  
"It's fine. Parenting means all kinds of strange bruises"  
"I didn't leave you at home for you to be bruised"  
"It was my fault. When I let him out his chair, I didn't realise he'd dropped his fork. I think he was trying to return it to me, but was too upset and wound up stabbing me with instead"  
Leaning down, Levi mouthed kisses onto the wound. Eren's stomach filling with nervous butterflies. He wanted his mate  
"Are you sure that beer was non-alcoholic?"  
"I doubled checked. How come?"  
"Because right now, I'm nervous"  
"What makes you so nervous?"  
"Being this relaxed. You gave that letter to Floch, so now if I choose to testify, it will be my choice. The doctor said that being physically intimate would be ok, and that she'd help the pup the best she could. And even though we've seen every single inch of each other, all I can think about is the warmth of your lips against my skin"  
"You're allowed to be happy. You're allowed to feel relieved"  
"My anxieties and depression has been so insufferable. It tells me how you don't want or need me. How I'm wrong and our pups are wrong. It tells me so many horrible things, but when you touch me, it's all I can think about"  
"What do you want? Right now. What do you choose for yourself?"  
"I want you... you're all I can ever want. I'm tired of going backwards with this. I'm tired of thinking, and feeling, too much. Today was a good day, other than Viren's tantrums. I want to try... I want to try with you"  
"Are you sure?"  
"Lee... you know I can't keep a straight face when people say it, but I want you to... makelovetome"  
He loathed the term. You didn't need to be in love to have sex, and every time someone said such, he couldn't keep a straight face   
"This morning..."  
"I know what I said... but I feel like if I don't take this step right now, I'm never going to be able to again. And it scares me. I want your knot, and I want your kisses, but only if you want to. Last night, you respected me wishes and I'm so grateful for that. I wasn't in the right from of mind, but this is me asking you to be with me"  
"Then let me take care of you"  
"You always do"  
"Only because you take such good care of me"

 

Presenting himself for Levi, his back was dipped as his small budding breasts rubbed against his blankets, moans and mews falling from his parted lips as Levi slowly teased him. His alpha's dick felt so good, his whole body feeling like he was melting as Levi fucked him slowly. His alpha first having showered kisses across his body as he stripped him down, before nudging him onto his side and eating him out till he came. By taking him slowly, he could feel the drag of Levi's dick each time he moved, pulling back until just the tip remained, then slamming back into him so hard that flashes of colour danced behind his closed eyelids, his sweet spot being abused so deliciously. Groaning as he rocked forward, Levi paused behind him  
"Eren?"  
"My... breasts..."  
"Come here"  
Pulling him by the hips, Eren's head lolled back onto his alpha's shoulder, his mate's hands moving to abuse his nipples as Levi trusted up from below. It felt amazing, but he needed more. His orgasm so close that he could scream from frustration. Rising himself up, he started to ride Levi hard, both hands on his stomach so he could keep his balance. His alpha's moans growing to growls as he thickened inside of him, Levi was so good to him, his mate panting in his ear  
"I'm going to come"  
"Come inside me... need your knot... fuck..."  
Dropping his hand down, he jerked himself hard, his orgasm finally hitting as he came across his hand and thighs, falling with his whole wait and shuddering as Levi's knot was pushed so deep he nearly wet himself in pleasure as his body went limp in his alpha's hold  
"I love you. I love you, so much"  
Reaching up with his clean hand, he patted Levi's cheek  
"I love you too... you're so deep. It feels so good"  
"You smell so good. I can smell your heat from last night, and how much you love fucking yourself on my dick"  
Eren would have rolled his eyes if he wasn't exhausted   
"It's a very nice dick"  
"I grew it myself"  
Turning his face, the kiss he pressed to Levi's face was clumsy, their lips barely meeting until his alpha made the effort for him. Sharing several long kisses, Eren sighed into Levi's mouth. His mate breaking the kiss. One hand coming up to tuck his hair behind his ear  
"What's wrong?"  
"Nothing. Not right now... I'm really sleepy"  
"Then sleep"  
"I want to hold you"  
"And you will, but right now, I want to feel you in my arms. You did so good"  
"So much for taking things slowly"  
"Fast or slow, we'll take it one step at time"  
"Goddamn sap"  
"Watch your language"  
"You love me, and my filthy mouth"  
"That I do"

When Levi's knot started to deflate, Eren whined at the loss. His alpha moving them to lay together, his arse firmly against his alpha's crotch, and his hormones were loving it. With a little bit of wiggling, he mounted his alpha, letting out a happy sigh  
"Really?"  
"Mhmm... it's calming feeling full"  
"What about the rest of me?"  
"That's pretty calming too"  
"And how shall I calm you?"  
"Slowly and hold me"  
"I'm not letting you go"  
"Not even if I have to pee?"  
"Hmmm..."  
"What about when I'm in labour? Will you be there?"  
"Of course I will be. I'll be holding your hand, and telling you how perfect you are"  
Rolling his hips, instead of moaning, Eren purred. His omega feeling over the moon that they wouldn't be giving birth alone... although he wasn't exactly alone the first time, he still didn't remember everything in absolute clarity... but if Levi was ok with being there again for a second labour, he couldn't have been too abuse to his alpha. Placing his hand over his, Levi moved to mount him from behind, with Eren half caged beneath him. Peppering kisses to his neck and shoulders, his alpha grew into a hard and fast pace, knotting him again, before whispering an apology for losing control. He couldn't be mad at him for it. He knew the effect his pregnancy had on his alpha. As Levi rolled them back, he took his mate's hand, holding it firmly to his chest with both of his. Even if they weren't getting married any time soon, in this moment, Levi was his in his entirety.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes! Our boy finally let himself admit that what he needs is Levi's touch. He's still scared, but knows Levi will stop if he asks or the moment he realises something is wrong, so even when his minds a mess, he's starting to believe in Levi's love again


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, ok, next chapter it starts

Levi wasn't going to be happy. They'd finally gotten new chairs for the dining table, rather than new set because they expected you to pay for each individual chairs, and their first visitor was Floch... to tell him he was still being forced to testify. Floch called it being subpoenaed, but it was the same thing. The trial date had been moved, first forward then back, now starting on the 23rd, meaning he'd be 22 weeks when he took the stand. At least he'd had a nicish, stab free week to recover a little... before Floch had shown up again to ruin that. Sitting across from the alpha, Floch was recording their conversation on his phone, as Eren was asked to confirm the identity of each person in the photos. Even if he couldn't remember their names, he was still asked to confirm whether he'd seen them at the compound. It felt like they were dancing around the issue. The man being brought before court was the leader of this whole thing. An idiot with money, who'd thought he'd brought allegiances, only to be thrown under the bus by then all. Nick. The man who was a blight to the life and freedom of every omega on the island. Despite his racing heart and sweaty palms, Eren had word vomit. It was like Floch had reached down and pulled the plug from his throat, leaving him jumping from photo to photo and man to man. He just wanted to get those over with. He wanted Floch out the apartment before Levi came home, and risked the safety of the new dining chairs... and he wanted Floch gone because he still couldn't figure the man out. He'd loudly announced Eren was being subpoenaed, then expected him to have enough composure to talk about everything. After looking at the photos, he knew he couldn't just let the people in them get away with everything, but it'd been a nice dream to imagine he didn't have to take the stand. It was nice to believe he had a choice, like Levi had told him.

When he ran out of people to talk about, Floch tapped his phone, before hitting his record again, Eren confused as to why... until Floch began asking him questions about his relationship with Levi. How long they'd been together. How they'd met. If Levi approved of him being a stripper. If Viren was Levi's. How their relationship had been after the Reiner thing. Was Levi responsible for his repeated trips to hospital. What Levi knew about Karanes. When did they get engage, and finally, why weren't they married? His questions were so far out of line, Eren's fingers hurt from how hard he gripping the edge of the table. He wanted to grab Floch by the throat and throw him off the balcony. None of it was any of his business. If he didn't know better, he'd swear the man was working for the piece of shit he was about to testify again. He spat each answer out, as if the words were poisoned. Floch not telling him that these were the kind of questions he'd face on the stand, until after he'd stopped recording the second line of questioning. Apparently he had to adjust his mood if he wanted to be believed. What a load of shit. As far as he was concerned, he had every right to be angered and insulted over being talked to like that. His pups were moving as if just angry, on his behalf. Instead of fucking of like he wanted him to, Floch decided he needed to dump two more lovely surprises on him. A full medical and psychological assessment, which had been requested by Nick's legal team. Both to be conducted by professionals chosen by Nick's team... in other words, people who wanted to make him feel like an absolute monster. The date and times had already been chosen, and Levi wasn't allowed to be in the room with him. Instead Floch made it sound like a big deal over having negotiated for a police and justice social worker to be there, though he couldn't say what their dynamic would be. If he was an alpha, he'd never have been forced to accept this degree of humiliation. If he was an alpha, people would listen to what he had to say... Now he was back to hating his secondary dynamic all over again. Back to doubting Levi could love or trust him. Doubting that one lone omega could make any difference at all. It wasn't a great feeling.

The moment Floch left, Eren was rushing into the bathroom to throw up. Anger and indignation swirling through his scent as he hunched over the bathroom sink. His stomach fucking hurt, each hurl making it worse. He didn't know how he was supposed to handle taking the stand and being grilled by an alpha he didn't know, when he couldn't stomach taking shit from Floch. Of all the fucking days. Viren would be home from Hanji's soon, with Anna staying the night. He'd already had to dissemble his nest wash all his blankets thanks to. All of that perfectly good Levi scent, washed down the drain because he was good person. Nesting was great. Nesting with Levi didn't just mean sex. It meant near naked cuddles, and secrets whispered in the middle of the night. Nesting with Viren and Levi meant knowing his small family were all together and safe. Nesting with Viren alone meant spending hours watching his son sleep. It meant reading him to sleep, even if he'd been a brat all day... He'd been mourning the loss of his nest when Floch had turned up... even the thought of spending time with Anna didn't improve his mood. 

Trapped in the bathroom, he groaned when he heard Hanji letting herself in. Viren yelling out "daddy", didn't lift his mood either. Levi was working a 12 hour shift, and wouldn't be home for a few more hours  
"Uncle Eren?!"  
At least Anna sounded happy  
"Just a minute!"  
Rinsing his mouth, he spat, before promptly jumping at Hanji's voice   
"There you are, Honey. Everything ok?"  
"I was ok until you gave me a heart attack"  
"Really? Because I smell anger, and vomit"  
"You smell too much. It's fine"  
With the secret out, he grabbed his toothbrush and the toothpaste, hoping the familiar taste of mint would calm his stomach  
"Mhmmm. I thought your nausea had passed?"  
"Nope"  
Brushing his teeth quickly, he rinsed and spat, annoyed that Hanji was watching him  
"What?"  
"I just thought you might want to talk"  
"There's nothing to talk about... I'm just in a bad mood from doing the washing"  
"Well, if it's just that, than that's ok. Now, I finish at 9 tomorrow morning, then I'm back at work from 7 until 7. All Anna's things are in her bag, and she's been super excited for this sleep over. With Marco and Jean... well, she's been lost"  
"It'll be fine. She understands that I get sick because I'm growing babies. I won't be freaking her out"  
"I know you won't. I know we haven't been talking about it, but I was hoping you'd be able to come to my next IVF appointment with me"  
Fuck. Hanji had wanted to wait for her next period to pass before trying again... he'd forgotten. How the hell could have he forgotten  
"What day is it?"  
"The 23rd"  
"I... that's the day the trial starts..."  
"Oh!"  
"Yeah. I might be able to make it, but I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I've been subpoenaed, so I have to go"  
"No. No. It's alright. I'll see if I can shift me appointment"  
"Hanji, no. I know how much this means to you, and I don't want to be in the way of this for you. I want this for you. You're an amazing mother to Anna, and to Viren... and I need another godchild"  
Keeping up with Anna and Viren was a struggle as it was. Keeping up with Anna, Viren, two newborn twins and another godchild... Lord give him strength  
Unexpectedly, Hanji teared up. Fanning her face, she tried to compose herself   
"Sorry. I've been pumping myself full of hormones"  
"Hanji. It's alright. Levi is going to be there, so will Mike"  
"I can take Viren"  
"We were going to ask if Eld or Gunther could"  
"There's a small play area at the clinic, you know that. They're used to children, and the procedure doesn't take very long"  
"I don't want you stressing yourself"  
"I don't mind. I can take the kids to the park and rest while they wear themselves out"  
"If you're sure..."  
"I am. Thank you, Sweetheart. Alright. I'm ok now. I better get to work"  
"Go. We'll be fine"

Hanji rushed out the room to kiss Anna goodbye, while Eren followed at much slower pace. Walking to the kitchen instead of becoming one with the sofa like he wanted, he grabbed out snacks and fruit boxes for the kids  
"Bye!"  
"Bye, Hanji!"  
Closing the door behind her, Eren sighed to himself. He didn't feel particularly child friendly. He really wanted Levi to come home so they could talk, but he also feared making his mate angry. Sitting herself on the sofa, Anna climbed up to watch him over the back of it, while only the top of Viren's hair was showing   
"Where's Uncle Levi?"  
"He's at work. He'll be home in a few hours"  
"Hear that Viren, your daddy will be home soonish. He's been asking for his dad"  
"I'm not surprised. Is there enough space for me to sit?"  
Anna hummed, pressing a finger to her chin as if thinking  
"I suppose I can make space. But only for you"  
"What about my babies?"  
"They're inside of you, so they get to sit too"  
Anna was completely precious  
"Alright. Make space, I'm bringing snacks"  
"Snacks? Uncle Eren! You're the best!"  
He didn't feel like the best, but it was nice to hear.

Viren wasn't happy Levi wasn't there. His son had gotten a good kick in when Eren had lifted his legs to make space on the sofa. Leaning to "whisper" in his ear, Anna was way too sweet  
"Uncle Eren. Are you ok?"  
Taking her hand, he placed it over the spot where Viren had hit his stomach   
"I'm all better now. Thank you for asking"  
"Why can't I feel anything?"  
"Because they're still really small. When they get bigger you'll be able to feel them"  
"Can you feel them?"  
"Yeah. It feels like bubbles in my belly"  
"My mum likes to stick straws up her nose and blow bubbles into her milk"  
Anna sounded equal parts impressed and revolted  
"I promise I won't do that. Why don't you pick something to watch?"  
"Ok!"

Turning his attention to Viren, he pulled his grumpy son into his lap  
"Hey, baby. Mummy missed you"  
Kissing his son's cheek, Viren let out a sigh  
"I want dad"  
"He's going to be home, once work is done"  
"He's always at work"  
"I know, but he's working hard so he can buy you all the things he likes"  
Tugging on his arm, Anna looked up to him with wide brown eyes  
"Uncle Eren, why don't you have a job?"  
"Because if I had a job, who would look after you two?"  
"I suppose that makes sense... but you're an adult"  
"I am. And I used to have a job, but now I'm... I'm taking time off because I'm having two babies"  
"So you don't have to work when you're having babies?"  
"It's a little different for everyone. Besides, I thought you liked hanging out with me"  
"I do. I wish you lived with us. That way I could see you all the time"  
"That's a very sweet thing to say, but what would Levi and Viren do?"  
Viren escaped his hold, kicking him leg as he pouted   
"I just need dad"  
"Then I'll take Uncle Eren"  
"No! He's my mum. Not yours"  
"Ok, you two. How about we watch movies until Levi comes home? Anna, you get to chose the first one"  
Because he'd told her to, with the hopes she'd be more interested in it than asking questions. Ignoring his son's anger, Eren wrapped his arm around his son, forcing him into cuddles. He didn't mean to upset Viren by talking to Anna, but he also didn't want to upset Anna by ignoring her. Kids could be worse than drunk alpha's when it came to being upset over small things...

Anna didn't stop talking the whole length of the movie, nor the second one. Half the time Eren wasn't even sure what she was talking about, while Viren had fallen asleep against him. Trying to pay attention to the girl, she scolded him more than once for zoning out. He couldn't help it. He was ignoring the fact he needed to use the bathroom as it was, and trying to look like he wasn't counting down the seconds until Levi came home. Nope. It was no good. Extracting himself from Anna and Viren's hold, he bopped Anna on the nose before excusing himself to the bathroom... he'd barely gotten to the toilet when Anna's voice came through the door, continuing her story. At least she didn't have a tantrum over being shut out the bathroom. Viren was far too young to understand space and privacy, and the idea of "going to the toilet in peace". Trying to tell Anna to head back to the sofa and that he'd be done shortly didn't work either, the girl starting some story about Hanji on the toilet that he didn't need to hear about. By the time he got out the bathroom, Anna had moved back to the sofa and was yelling out her story. His aching head didn't appreciate the girl's loud voice, while the side of his stomach didn't appreciate Viren's hard kick. Walking past the sofa, Anna leapt up and followed him into the kitchen  
"What are you doing?"  
"I'm taking some medicine for a headache"  
"What medicine?"  
"It's for adults"  
"Mummy gives me this gross liquid when I'm sick. Is it the same thing?"  
They were both paracetamol, so kind of  
"Yeah. This is just the adult version"  
"It's gross. You shouldn't take it"  
"If I don't take it, I won't feel better"  
"Maybe you just need to do a big poo. My mum says..."

It was now that Levi finally arrived to save him. Hearing the creak of the door, Anna span on the spot  
"Uncle Levi! Uncle Eren needs to poo"  
Choking on the water from the bottle he grabbed off the counter, stupidly thinking he was safe because she was distracted, Levi raised an eyebrow at him  
"Does he, now?"  
"Yep! He has a head... what did you call it again?"  
"A headache. I have a headache. Welcome home"  
"It's good to be home. I brought Chinese"  
Locking the door, his mate walked over to drop the bags of takeaway food on the table, before lifting Viren into his hold. The boy waking and joyously crying for Levi as hugged him  
"Hey, brat. Did you have a good time at Aunty Hanji's"  
"He's been asking for you the whole time. And he kicked Uncle Eren more than once"  
Dammit Anna  
"Did you kick your mum? You know that's very naughty"  
"He did"  
"Alright. That's enough, Anna. Why don't you go sit down on the sofa while I organise dinner"  
"Uncle Eren, he hurt you"  
"It's ok. He didn't mean to"  
"It's not ok. No one hurts my Uncle"  
"Viren's been naughty and he knows it... Uncle Levi and I will talk about it after dinner. Uncle Levi has to take a shower now, so why don't you watch something?"  
Anna sighed, slouching forward as she dragged herself to the sofa. 

Sitting Viren down, Levi grabbed the bags of food back up, moving them to the dining table before continuing into the kitchen. Wrapping his arms around him, Levi gave him a small kiss before hugging him properly  
"Are you ok?"  
"It's a little tender, but he was jealous that Anna was giving me attention"  
"No bleeding?"  
"Not that I saw. We need to talk later, once the kids are in bed"  
"I can smell it on you. Something happened"  
"I've officially been subpoenaed, and not just summoned. Floch came earlier and there's stuff to talk about. There's papers on the table about it"  
"Eren..."  
"Not right now. Not in front of the kids"  
"You should have called"  
"You were working. He made me angry, but that was about it"  
"Hmm. I don't like it"  
"I know. Thanks for bringing home dinner. Anna has been talking non-stop and I didn't want to disturb Viren"  
"I'm not impressed"  
"Then maybe you need to poo"  
Levi laughed, nodding as he did  
"Maybe I do. But it sounds pretty crap to me"  
Eren groaned   
"A poo joke. Are you shitting me?"  
"I knew I fell in love with you for a reason"  
"Mmm. Go take a shower. I'll get dinner organised"

 

Having more dining chairs made dinner easier. The table wasn't massive, so he could sit between Anna and Viren without getting trouble with either of them. Viren didn't want to eat anything Levi didn't give him, while Anna was asking Levi question after question. The alpha patiently answering every single one, while talking to Viren at the same time. With the three of them talking, he didn't have to contribute. He was free to sit there and brood over Floch, as he also fought the desire to simple faceplant into his food and sleep like the dead  
"Eren?"  
Blinking owlishly at Levi, Eren couldn't hide his yawn  
"How about I give the kids their bath, while you stack the dishwasher?"  
Levi was perfection personified. Bath time was way too much effort after having to adult, and then listen to Anna   
"Mmm... then I'll do story time. I made up the bed up, so both kids can sleep in my old room"  
"Alright. We'll divide and conquer"

 

Viren wanted to sleep in his own bed, which meant reading the same book twice to the kids. He didn't even need the book, the words so deeply imprinted on his brain, he wondered if his intelligence suffered for it. He'd tried to hint to Anna to choose another one, but the girl didn't want to have it. Stumbling into Levi's room, his mate was messing with their blankets as he wrapped his arms around him  
"Everything ok?"  
"It is now"  
"Do you want to help me straighten these out? What book was it?"  
"What book is it always?"  
"That depends on who's asking"  
"I don't even need the book anymore"  
Laughing, Levi turned in his hold  
"It can't be that bad... I know they're no Chronicles of Narnia, but..."  
"Levi. I know it word for word"  
"I'm sure you don't. Now go grab the other side of this for me"

Taking a deep breath, Eren recited as he moved to the other side of the bed   
"You cannot rhyme,  
It is a crime,  
If you rhyme, you must do the time.

It is a crime,  
If I do rhyme,  
But why must I do the time?

You must do the time,   
Because to rhyme,  
Is to commit a crime.

But why is rhyme a crime?  
Why can't I rhyme all the time?  
I can mime my rhyme!  
I came rhyme with time...  
Or dime!   
Or even Lime!

I can rhyme on a ship,  
With a pirate with a fat lip!  
I can rhyme on the beach,  
As I eat a juicy peach!

I can rhyme in the bath,  
Or down the garden path!  
I can rhyme in the car,  
As we go very far!

I can rhyme to the mouse,  
That lives in my house.  
I can rhyme to my bed,  
Where I rest my sweet head.

I can rhyme to my sister,  
As she dresses my blister.  
I can rhyme at the pig, wearing a wig   
As he dances a jig!

I can rhyme on the busses,  
As my mother fusses.  
I can rhyme to my feet,  
As they tap out a beat.

I can rhyme on my bike,  
Or as we go for a hike!  
I can rhyme to the cat,  
As he drinks milk thick and fat!  
I can rhyme, I can rhyme, I can rhyme!

But you cannot rhyme,  
It is a crime.

Then I shall be the naughtiest child in the world! 

I'll do the time,  
For my crime,  
As I rhyme!"

Over their blankets, Levi stared at him  
"I told you I know the stupid thing off by heart"  
"I think it's time that book too a little walk"  
"Then you're the one stuck explaining it to both of them"  
Climbing in on his side of the bed, Eren let out a long sigh   
"I really hate that book"  
"That's not what it sounded like to me"  
Climbing in on his own side, Eren reached out for Levi, pulled his alpha close  
"I do. And we need to talk about the... Floch thing... but right now, I'm too tired"  
Interrupting his sentence with two loud yawns, he yawned a third time as he nuzzled into Levi's chest  
"I have two appointments I have to attend and... I have to testify"  
"I thought you said you're tired"  
"I am... I just wanted to make sure you knew"  
"I knew. I know. Oh ho ho"  
Eren groaned, weakly slapping Levi's arm  
"No more. I'm too tired"  
"Alright then. I love you"  
"Mmm. I love you, too. That book should be some kind of torture device"  
"Only for you... Shit. It's stuck in my head"  
"Suffer..."  
Levi grumbled about binning the book, while wrapping his arms around him. Next time, it was Levi's job to do story time.

 

*  
Snuggled up on the sofa with Eren, Levi was playing with his hair. He was supposed to have gone into work, but after Eren's ultrasound appointment, he couldn't bare to leave him mate alone. The tumour had hit its growth spurt, now measuring over 4 centimetres, with over an inches growth in the last two weeks. On top of that, Viren hadn't been happy seeing his new siblings on the screen. Eren hadn't asked him to stay home. His mate just gave him a heartbreaking look during his ultrasound. His eyes were dry, but filled with pain. Coming home, Eren had dropped down on the sofa, obviously needing to think things through. So once Viren was set up drawing and talking away to his teddy, Levi had lifted his mate into his lap for some major cuddling. Floch had set the first of Eren's appointments for the following day. The physical came first, then the psychological exam came the Friday before court. It wasn't such a leap to think that it was intentional, so that Eren would still be shaken over it once the trial began.

Nuzzling into Eren's hair, his omega sighed softly as he took his hand, pressing kisses to Levi's knuckles before placing it on his stomach for belly rubs, which he was happy to give  
"Wanna talk about it?"  
"No. Don't you have work?"  
"It's fine"  
"Levi"  
"It's fine. I don't particularly feel like going to work"  
"No one feels like going to work, but you have to"  
Levi's alpha couldn't take the idea of parting with their mate. Not after watching the scan, and smelling his omega's fear. If he went to work, he'd be more of a liability than a help. Any small thing could make him snap  
"It's better I'm home right now. I already sent my boss a message. She knew about the scan. Besides, it's only the second half the shift. They'll send the placements out with the veterans"  
"I didn't even hear you leave this morning"  
Probably because Eren was out like a light...  
"You heard me come home"  
"Doesn't mean I didn't miss you when I woke up. Are you sure it's ok? She said she couldn't give you time off"  
"It's not really time off"  
"It's half a shift. You should go"  
"Eren, no. Just like your omega doesn't want you to be left alone, my alpha can't leave you alone"  
"Sometimes I think your alpha's more of an omega than mine"  
"Don't give it ideas. Since I'm home, we could do something?"  
"I honestly just want to sit here and do this. When the trial starts, we have no idea what's going to happen. So I want to enjoy this while we can"  
"We could look for things for the pups?"  
Eren swallowed hard, tensing his hold. His fiancée was probably trying his hardest not to think about his scan, yet there he went  
"Or not... we could get some popcorn and watch a movie?"  
"I have a headache, but you and Viren can watch a movie. I'll go lay down..."  
"That ruins the whole point of us doing something together"  
"Daddy?"  
Looking up from his drawings, Viren nodded  
"TV? Pleeeeease?"  
"See. You should spend time with him"  
"I am spending time with him"  
"I mean one on one. I don't mind"  
"I'm not choosing between him and you"  
"I'm not telling you too. I'll just take some panadol and go for a nap"  
Eren had been taking panadol far too frequently for his liking. It seemed like every day his mate was coming down with headaches. He'd had bloods taken while in hospital, but the technician had been alarmed to see the bruising across Eren's stomach, and his low blood pressure. Levi wanted to book him an appointment with his doctor, but they couldn't do that until they knew when Eren would be giving evidence. Some of it had been bruises across from sex, his finger marks on Eren's hips, but the bruise he'd gotten from Viren was a dark and nasty purple, that shouldn't have formed from a light kick, and was what the technician was really worried over. The pups had been ok during the scan, other than the growth of the tumour, but if it was starting to cause real problems with Eren's health, then what came next? Bruising during pregnancy could mean any number of things, yet googling Eren's symptoms was only going to make things worse for his anxieties over his mate   
"Lee?"  
"Sorry. I was just thinking"  
"Don't think too hard. It's just a headache from lack of sleep..."  
"I thought you slept through the night"  
"If your babies would leave my bladder alone, than maybe I would"  
"Fair point. I still don't want to let you go"  
"Aw, does my alpha want cuddles?"  
"Yes"  
Eren kissed his cheek  
"I'm sure Viren will give you plenty"  
Climbing off his lap, Levi was sure Eren wasn't as ok with heading off for a nap as he was pretending to be. When Anna was around, Viren's jealousy had become a lot more apparent. He didn't want things dissolving to the point where Eren was struggling to connect with Viren again. 

While Eren napped, Viren started drawing again. Levi moving off the sofa to sit on the floor with him, his son proudly explaining what he was drawing as he did. It was a good thing too, as Levi wasn't sure what the lines or colours were supposed to mean. "Forced" to draw by his son, his own artist ability was exhibited by three stick figures and a potato looking cat, which Viren scribbled over when he saw he wasn't drawing what he was supposed to. It was hardly his fault that the most he'd ever drawn had been basic medical diagrams. Placing down the red pencil he'd been using, Levi stretched as he yawned, sitting on the floor doing no favours for his aching back, while his alpha was annoyed at their son for destroying his work of art. It was such a pathetic thing to be petty over, that it made him feeling about thing. If his alpha wasn't urging him to check on Eren, then it must believe that Eren needed the rest  
"Daddy, I'm hungry"  
Smiling at his son, Levi pulled him into his lap, kissing the top of his head as he squeezed him tight   
"It's about lunch time isn't it? What do you think mummy wants for lunch?"  
"Pasta!"  
"Mummy wants pasta? Or do you want pasta?"  
"Both!"  
Snorting, Levi hefted Viren up onto his shoulders, his son grabbing his hair as he rose to stand. Screaming, the boy kicked his legs   
"Daddy! Too high!"  
Whoops... If he was too high on Levi's shoulders, he wondered what their son thought of being on Eren's? Lifting Viren back down, he kissed his son's exposed back, before lowering him to stand, where he dropped down to squat  
"Are you going to help daddy make lunch?"  
Nodding happily, the toddler jumped up, running from his side, and into the kitchen. Levi having to jog after him before he could get into any mischief. The drawers were mostly Viren proof, but where there was a toddler, there was a way  
"Come here, you. Up we go"  
Lifting his son, he helped the boy wash his hands, before sitting him down in his usual spot on the bench... where the most trouble he could into was eating the ingredients   
"Now. What do you want on this pasta?"  
"Sketti!"  
"You want sketti?"  
"Sketti and nuggets"  
The world's healthiest lunch right there... they had one of those weird vegetable peeler things that turned carrots and zucchinis into pasta, but he didn't know if they had pasta sauce... 

 

He'd been forced to go the unhealthy route for lunch. Not that he'd admit it, but he had no luck with the vegetables. All incriminating evidence had been dinner, and a pot of pasta was now boiling on the stove, while the nuggets baked  
"Dad, mum wants you"  
He didn't hear Eren calling out to him. Kissing Viren on the forehead, he made sure everything sharp was out the way  
"Alright. Do you want to come down, or are you going to stay up here?"  
"Down!"  
"You've got to promise me you won't go near the kitchen without daddy"  
Shoving cheese in his mouth, Viren nodded around the mouthful. Lifting him off the bench, he steered the boy to the sofa  
"You be a good boy and stay here for me"  
"Levi?!"  
"Coming!"

Eren was sitting on their bedroom, a wad of bloody tissues pushed to his nose  
"Blood nose?"  
"Tissue box is empty. Don't want Viren to see"  
"I'll grab you some toilet paper"  
"Thank you"  
Levi's heart was racing as he jogged into the bathroom, grabbing a fresh roll of toilet paper and bringing it back to Eren. A simple blood nose shouldn't have gotten him so worked up, but with an unsettled alpha, he'd jumped to panic mode  
"Here, let me look"  
"It's not great"  
"Show me"  
Eren's hands were bloodied from the bleed, it didn't look like it was going to stop any time soon. Throwing the ruined tissues in the bin, he tore off a long strip of toilet paper, folding it up and pressing it to Eren's nose. Holding it there with one hand, he placed his other hand on Eren's forehead. He felt warm, but not too warm  
"Thank you... I need to start lunch"  
"No need, Viren and I have it handled. Sketti and nuggets"  
"Sorry. I don't feel that hungry. I was going to make lunch for you two"  
"I've got it handled..."  
"Then you should make sure Viren isn't at the oven. He gets a bit excited when he smells nuggets"  
Levi frowned at Eren's dismissal. Didn't his mate trust him go feed their son? Eren knew he cook... so why was he trying to get rid of him?!  
"I could make you something"  
"No... no, I just needed so more tissues for my nose. If you've you it covered I'll go back to sleep when this stops"  
"You need to eat"  
"Levi, it's fine"  
"You're not fine. I saw how upset you were during the ultrasound. Now you're pushing Viren and I away. I stayed home to be with you today... because you're not the only one hurting over this"

A long moment of silence hung between them, Eren taking the toilet paper from his hold and swapping the toilet paper over. His mate spoke as if choosing each word carefully   
"I didn't mean to make you feel like that. I'm not trying push you both away, I just didn't get much sleep last night. I don't want to be tired and cranky on top of everything right now. Plus, Viren has been pretty upset with me lately, so I thought he'd feel better after spending some time with you"  
So he hadn't upset Eren? And Eren was upset with him?  
"And there really wasn't any more to it than that?"  
"No, Levi. My stomach feels too queasy for food right now. So, maybe later. I think Viren's coming to find you"  
For a toddler, their son's footsteps were heavier than his own. Running into the room, Viren placed his hands on his hips as he yelled at them  
"Daddy! Food!"

Eren wiped at his nose, turning to hide the blood from Viren. His hand covering most of his smile. It was relieving to know that his mate really wasn't avoiding their son, nor did he feel disclude again. Making a shooing motion with his hand, Eren continued   
"Go check the food, I'll be fine with this"  
"Are you sure?"  
"Now that we have this little misunderstanding out of the way, you can relax"  
"Alright. I still want to do something with you and Viren"  
He didn't care what. He just wanted a distraction from the sick feeling the ultrasound had left him with  
"It's only lunch time, there's still time"  
"Daddy!"  
"Yeah, baby. I'm coming. Stay here, head forward and if this is still bleeding in a few minutes, I want to know"  
"I'll be fine. Just go already"  
"Let me..."  
Reaching for the toilet paper, Eren rolled his eye at him  
"I'll let you know. Seriously, I've got it handled"  
Kissing Eren's forehead, Levi collected Viren as he headed out the room. What was he supposed to do for the whole afternoon if Eren slept through? Eren was the one with the good ideas, and the one who was great with children. He didn't know how to keep their son entertained. They'd been drawing for the past few hours. Maybe a trip to the park? They could swing by Hanji's and pick up Viren's trike, then spend a few hours letting Viren work off his extra energy? But would Eren be up for that, or would being outside over stimulate his mate's nerves? It wasn't an overly hot day, but the sun could cause another nose bleed. Even if his mate was back in their room, he was still lost without his guidance. Parenting wasn't easy, but Eren knew what to do, better than he did. Without his omega's support, there was no way he could raise a child... Maybe they could do something else? Eren deserved some pampering. He couldn't take a toddler to a beauty parlour, and clothes shopping would probably be met with a sigh... 

Sliding the tray of nuggets out the oven, they were on their way to being cremated rather than golden brown. The pasta had boiled into a soggy lump, with bits burnt to the bottom of the saucepan... How was he supposed to look after three pups if he couldn't even cook lunch for one?!   
"Daddy?"  
"Sorry, brat. Daddy burnt lunch..."  
"No nuggets?"  
Viren's eyes filled with tears as his lip quiver. Rubbing his hand threw his hair, Levi was wishing he had a time machine to go back and save both Eren, and Viren, from heartbreaking news. Fuck it. He'd have to order in for lunch, and if he ordered extra, they could have a picnic dinner in the park. That could work. Maybe the universe had burnt their lunch with that in mind? The idea passed through his mind like it was a perfectly logical assumption, leaving him laughing at himself. God. Like he'd believe in something like that  
"Viren, how do you feel about going to the park?"  
"Park?"  
With one small word, the boy's troubles were forgotten  
"Mum! Park!"  
It was no good trying to explain to Viren that he had to wait, the toddler running off to inform Eren, chanting "park" as he did. It was probably for the best. If he'd asked, Eren might have said no. His mate couldn't say no to Viren... A picnic linner?, or was it dunch?, when lunch and dinner were combined. Whatever it was called, they definitely deserved it. Depositing the saucepan in the sink to soak, he'd deal with it later. Keys. He needed his keys. Viren would need a jumper, and so would Eren...

Wandering into the living area, Levi forgot what he was doing. Noticing the coffee table needed a quick clean up, he didn't remember he was on his way back to Eren to ask about the park. Embarrassed over his slight senior moment, he tried to cover himself as he strode into their bedroom, acting like he was rushing to get things done as he opened up his wardrobe   
"Are you two ready? Viren and I made a bit of a mess"  
"Levi... I don't think I'm up for the park"  
Turning to his omega, Levi eyed Eren's pale face, the toilet tissue still covering his nose  
"Is it still bleeding?"  
"I feel dizzy"  
"It hasn't stopped?"  
"N-no..."  
"Change of plans, you're going to hospital"  
He expected Eren to fight him  
"That... that might be for the best"  
His compliance momentarily stunned Levi, the argument he was forming in his head for Eren to go to hospital destroyed immediately   
"You. You want to go?"  
"I don't want to, but it's not stopping... I'm starting to get scared"  
"Ok. Can you stand?"  
"I don't think so"  
"How long would you say it's been bleeding now?"  
"About 25 minutes. I don't know. It was bleeding when I woke up, then it kept going"  
Way too long for a normal nosebleed...  
"I'm sorry, Viren. The park will have to wait"


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It. Begins.

Stress induced nosebleed, followed stress induced nosebleed over the next few days. Eren's nose had a mind of its own, though thankfully none of the subsequent breeds had been as bad as the first one. His omega had had his physical examination, coming out of that to one heading straight to the bathroom throw up, before refusing to talk about what happened in there. Levi hadn't met the police departments social worker before, but being an alpha didn't help the woman's case, despite her kind if not overly professional nature. While it was true that Eren's fear of male alpha's had grown so much better, the scents released by the woman in question were so strong to his omegas sensitive nose, that the moment he'd laid eyes on her, he'd flinched away. With only 3 full days left until the trial started and with two of them being the weekend, it was too late to find another social worker. He was worried enough for his omega, that he'd forgotten things could go from bad to worse with his mates mental state.

Once again, he wasn't allowed to join Eren for his appointment in case he impacted on Eren's results, or tried to influence his mate's decisions. Nuzzling and kissing Eren's cheek, his mate was hesitant to let him go. Despite the fact he was dressed in one of Levi overly large shirts and his Paramedic jacket. When Eren was led away, it felt more like his mate was being torn from his grip.

Eren was only gone from his sight for a short time before the social worker was opening the door and calling him down. Jogging down the hall, the woman stepped forward to stop him rushing into the room  
"We need a medic. I can't leave..."  
"I am a medic"  
Pushing past the woman, Eren was curled into a ball in the far corner of the sparse room. The examination was being held at the police station, already throwing Eren was out of his comfort zone, and the concrete walls of room were much like the rest of the station. Designed to be alienating and cause feelings of discomfort. Rushing over to his mate, his growl silenced the therapist and the social worker who were both whispering furiously over the examination  
"What the fuck did you do to him?"  
Whimpering and whining, Eren was continuing to attempt an escape  
"Eren. Eren its Levi. I need you to breathe for me"  
"You're not supposed to be in here!"  
The examiner was so fucking lucky he had his hands full with Eren. Placing his hands on Eren's face, his fiancée gave out a pained cry. His lips were moving, but nothing was coming out as he silently cried for help  
"Eren. You're ok. You're safe. They can't hurt you. I'm here. Listen to my voice"  
Kicking out at him, Levi copped it to the shin. Releasing the left side of Eren's face, he moved his mate's leg aside to kneel between them. With the way he was breathing, his mate was on his way to passing out, rather than calming down  
"I'm here. I need you to focus on me. Breathe for me. Come on. In through your nose"  
He wasn't getting through at all. Leaning in, he guided Eren to his neck. His omega trying to shove against him, while Levi held him firm  
"Shhhhh. You're safe. You're in a safe place... shhh, I've got you. I've got you, brat. No ones going to hurt you... I've got you"  
Rocking Eren, his mate let out a strangled kind of whine before his whole body went through the motions of sobbing, without the sound. His breaths falling as a whimpering pant of pain. Crooning softly, Levi rubbed his mate's back  
"I'm here. I'm here, my omega"

He failed to anchor Eren and calm him down, his mate slumping in his hold and falling still. Repositioning Eren into his lap, he tapped his face gently. Yeah, there was no way the examination was continuing today  
"Mr Ackerman?"  
"Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Depression. Anxiety. Not only that, he's 5 months pregnant. I know both of you are trained to recognise the symptoms of the onset of a panic attack. How could you let things get this bad so fast? The moment he started exhibiting symptoms, you should have paused the evaluation. What did you say to him? What could possibly so important that you needed to push him to the point he couldn't respond?"  
Glaring daggers at the pair of morons who'd done this to his mate, he snapped when they took too long to answer  
"Well!? What do you have to say for yourselves?"  
"Eren became non-responsive during questioning over his childhood"  
"Non-responsive. Non-reposive or non-verbal? There's a big difference between the two of them"  
The therapist in charge of the examination let out long breath. Like the man was doing anything strenuous enough to warrant breathing  
"He was able to provide clear answers to the initial questions over his identity, however once we moved to establishing his childhood, he became agitated, before signing your name. Explaining to him that you couldn't be present due to the nature of this appointment, I felt it was fine to continue with the line of questioning"  
"You were warned about his health when we arrived here"  
"The specifics of which were withheld for a clear and fair assessment of his mental state"  
"Well here's what you wanted, he watched his father kill his mother. He watched two alpha's he thought he could trust kill his brother, after they had their way with him. He had a complicated first pregnancy, and even more complicated one this time around. This is why the social worker was supposed to be on his side to prevent something like this happening"

In his arms, Eren let out a low gasp, his mate struggling slightly before burying his face against Levi's chest  
"L...Lee?"  
"I'm here. I've got you. You're safe"  
Letting out a low whine, Levi moved to gather him up. Now the social worker decided to look appropriately worried  
"Has he come too?"  
"Yes, and now I'm taking him home. He's not able to answer any of your questions like this"  
"I've called for an ambulance..."  
"He doesn't need an ambulance"  
"For our records, he needs to be seen"  
"You do realise I work with, or know, whom ever it is that is going to respond. They will the same thing I am saying. He needs to go home and he needs to rest! Oh... fuck"  
Eren's nose was starting to bleed again...  
"Eren, I'm going to move you up to sit in the chair. I'm not leaving you, ok? I'm right here"

Sitting Eren up, his mate wouldn't look him in the eye. With a wad of substandard paper against his nose, he kept his gaze at his feet. Floch was now hovering, as they waited for the paramedics. The medical officer assigned to the police station knew him, declaring himself useless as Levi had the situation in control, before kindly fucking off like Levi wished the others would.

Erwin was the one to take the call, shadowed by two of his students. It wasn't how he wanted Eren to meet his students, not that he wanted them to meet him at all. It was hardly impartial, Erwin having them write up Eren's stats and patient form, while hovering in the corner with his arms crossed. The only variation on his diagnosis and treatment of Eren's panic attack, was that they recommended a trip to hospital given his pregnancy. Eren declined with a shake of his head, the students turned to Erwin for confirmation. Erwin agreed with them, but left the decision to Levi, who decided it was time for Eren to go home and rest where he felt safe.

Carrying Eren out, his mate kept sighing every few steps. Letting out an even louder sigh as Levi opened the car door for him. Sighing back, Eren frowned at him  
"Are you going to talk to me, or keep sighing?"  
Eren huffed  
"The silent treatment... I see how it is"  
Settling his mate down, Eren shook his head  
"Oh... you know you can use your words. You can tell me anything, Eren"  
Shaking his head, Eren started to sign at him  
"I don't think I can do this"  
"Hey. You can"  
"They wanted to know about dad"  
"Yeah. He said as much"  
"It hit me all at once. And..."  
He waved his hand at his throat  
"Alright. I understand. You just rest, when we get home, I'll run you a bath with all the oils and salts you want"  
"Don't you have work?"  
"I start at 7. It's overnight to night"  
"You're still not talking to Erwin?"  
"I'm not ready to"  
"I think you should"  
Leaning in, Levi kissed Eren's forehead  
"We'll talk about it when we get home"  
"Lee. You don't have many friends. I don't have the energy to stay mad. I'm going to slap him..."  
Eren's hand movements increased. He hadn't realised his mate had put time into learning more sign language along the line   
"Slow down. I'm rusty here"  
"I'm going to slap him. But I want you to make up with him"  
"What are you, my mum?"  
"I'm just your mate"  
"There's no just about it. You're my mate and I'm sorry you had to go through that"  
"Take me home. I want to cuddle"  
"And you're not going to tell me the rest of what happened in there, are you?"  
"No. It was just dad"  
"Ok. Next stop is the apartment"

Eren fell asleep on the drive home, his mate's face still too pale for his liking. Carrying his lover up to their apartment, he couldn't help but be angry over what had happened. Yes. Grisha was a piece of shit who'd turned tail over some bullshit about protecting Eren and Zeke, but Eren hadn't known anything about it. He'd thought his father had just abused him and abandoned him. Grisha was sure to come up in the trial, but there had to have been a way bringing it up much more gently. Letting them in, he narrowly missed knocking Eren's head on the doorframe. Hanji was looking after Viren, and would be dropping him and Anna home on her way in to work, leaving them with the whole apartment to themselves... and Titan. The cat in question was laying on his back on the sofa, snoring his head off and not giving two shits that they could be breaking in. Kicking the door closed behind him, his efforts to leave Eren sleeping were ruined by the sound of door slamming slightly. Whining at him, confused eyes met his  
"You fell asleep during the drive. I didn't mean to wake you"  
Closing his eyes again, Eren was adorable as he nuzzled into him  
"Let's get you into that bath. I can wash your hair for you"  
Nodding, Eren gave a sleepy purr. He didn't expect a purr, but he'd take it and the feelings behind the sound. A snuggly Eren was a nice change from an Eren so stressed he was jumping over everything.

Getting them stripped and into the bath, he washed Eren down before starting to fill the tub. His omega so tired he'd wet himself when Levi had set him down on the toilet. Climbing in behind him, he wrapped his legs around Eren's, pulling his mate down so his head rested on his shoulder. Nuzzling Eren's hair, he let his hands slide over Eren's swollen belly. Their next ultrasound was coming all too soon. Floch had said the witnesses would be testifying before the evidence was presented, with the idea being that the witness testimony would be forgotten by the jurors. Moaning softy, Eren placed his own hands over Levi's  
"Don't worry. I won't do anything, but I love the feel of your skin beneath my fingers, and I love this stomach of yours. I know things are shit at the moment, but this makes me so proud. You. Beautiful and pregnant like this as we make our family bigger. No matter what happens, you're my mate. No matter what anyone says or does, you're my omega. And the mother to our pups. The only mother they could ever want or need. You're so amazing, Eren. You might have had a tiny set back today, but now you're laying here and letting me hold you. I love you"  
Reaching up, Eren bopped him on the nose, before cupping his right cheek so he could kiss the left one  
"I know. I'm an old softy. If you sit forward, I'll wash your hair"  
Wriggling forward, Eren whined at him when he moved his hands off the omega's swell. Kissing along the curve of Eren's neck, his omega whined at him  
"Ok. Ok. I'll wash your hair. You're such a brat"

Eren purred up a storm as Levi washed his hair for him. Relaxing back against him, kisses were pressed to his cheek as his hands were moved back to Eren's stomach   
"More belly rubs? I can't wait to start feeling them... I wish I could right now"  
Drawing on the back of his hand, Eren traced out the word "soon"  
"Yeah. We should probably finally look at what needs to be done in your old room to make it Viren safe, and move your things into mine. It's going to be awfully crowded in here. You. Me. Viren. These two little ones, and Titan. It's going to be a very full house"  
Wriggling away from him, water was sent everywhere as Eren turned to look at him  
"Safe"  
"What do you mean? Are you wondering if it's going to be safe? Or you want to stay here because it's safe?"  
"Here is safe"  
"I know. I was just thinking out loud"  
"Do you want to leave?"  
"Leave?"  
"Here?"  
"Not at this very moment. But I'd be lying if I said it hadn't crossed my mind about the lack of space here. Come back here, you don't need to worry about it. That's what I'm here for"  
Eren's frown deepened, he mate moving further away. Grabbing his arm, he pulled back to him   
"When you get old, all you seem to do is think. Things are fine the way they are, and I want you in my room... our room. I can see if we can get the doors swapped, so you'll be able to lock the door to our room when you need to... and we can make space to move all your things back in... and turn our bed into a nest... with all the blankets you want"  
He may be slightly scrambling to un-upset his mate. Eren still not looking happy   
"We can start when we get out. I promise"  
Huffing, his mate signed at him  
"I don't want to think about leaving this place"  
"I know you love it. I didn't mean to upset you"  
"I'm sorry. I think I need a nap or something"  
"Eren, you don't need to be sorry. I was just... I was thinking out loud. I should have kept my mouth shut"  
"No"  
"Yes. You're upset enough as it was. I let your purring go to my head. I've missed the sound of your happiness"  
God. He was going from bad to worse. Eren looked ready to cry  
"Not that you're not happy! No. I'm fucking this right up. What I'm trying to say is, I'm a shitty alpha. We were supposed to be cuddling and relaxing, and I fucked it up. God. Ok, I'm going to shut up now"  
Leaning in, he thought Eren was going to hit him. Instead his mate kissed him, before flicking him in the middle of the forehead  
"I deserved that"  
Nodding, Eren made towards getting out. Letting his mate figure out the best way to get out without slipping, Eren held his hand out to him once he was out  
"I'm allowed out?"  
Rolling his eyes, he shook his hand, Levi taking it  
"I don't deserve you"

From the bath, Eren let him wrap him up in a thick green towel. Covering himself, he took his mate's hand again, supporting him across the wet floor and to their room. Drying his omega down, he grabbed Eren some sweats and shirt. Ignoring the shirt, his mate wiggled his way into his sweats before claiming Levi's side of the bed for himself. It only took a few moments before Eren was asleep, Levi sighing to himself quietly as he covered his mate with the closest blanket. He didn't know if he was supposed to stay? Or if he was supposed to go now that Eren was dressed and sleeping... He had a bathroom to clean, but Eren would probably be plagued by nightmares... and he had a shift to get ready for.

 

Despite having just fallen asleep, Eren came padding out their bedroom half an hour later. Levi sitting on the sofa with Titan as his mate walked over to him. Sinking down, Eren wrapped his arms around him, dissolving into tears as he did  
"Nightmare?"  
Shaking his head, Eren pulled back enough to sign  
"I'm sorry we fought"  
"Oh, brat. That wasn't a fight, and it's not worth these tears"  
"Please don't leave me"  
"I'm not leaving you alone. Think about it, in just over a week, I'll be home all the time. I'll be around so much you'll be sick of me"  
"Dad left"  
"Eren, the only good thing that man ever did was creating you. He was a coward who's lies cost people dearly. You're strong and you have a strong sense of justice. I'm not leaving you"  
"I feel like worse is coming"  
"I don't know. But we've got each other, and Viren"  
"He's going to hate me"  
"He's not going to hate you"  
"I can't speak"  
"Eren, we both know it's not permanent. You're stressed, and tired, and exhausted, and you smell like you're trying to go into heat again. It's all a bit much right now, but with a good nights sleep, you'll feel better. By the time Hanji drops the kids off, it'll be bed time. Which means, I want you to sleep. I'll be fine at work. I always am"  
Eren had been sopping wet with slick as they'd bathed, but the smell of fear and distress had covered the scent of heat. With that washed away, his natural scent was overriding the scents of jasmine and strawberries from the bath salts. He really shouldn't be surprised. It'd been Grisha and Zeke who'd taught Eren heats were wrong. Yet it was Grisha who'd really instilled the fear over being an omega... If Eren couldn't find his voice before the trial started, he'd ridiculed over his silence   
"Erwin?"  
Pulled from his thoughts, he pushed down his jealousy over Eren mentioning Erwin   
"No. He's on a different shift rotation"  
"You should talk to him"  
Reaching out, Levi wiped at Eren's tears  
"You worry too much. I want you to be selfish. I want you to put you and our pups first. I want you tell me what you need"  
"You"  
"You already have me, and you don't need to worry. I was never mad at you. It wasn't a fight. It's time to go back to bed"  
"I don't want to go. I want to stay with you"  
"We have time before Hanji drops the kids off. I'll stay until she does"  
"And then I'll close my eyes and when I wake up, you'll be gone"  
"I'll be back just before 8 tomorrow morning. Then we can go out? We can go have breakfast?"  
"I..."  
Eren bit his lip, before looking away  
"You don't want to leave the apartment?"  
"It's stupid"  
"It's like you said. It all hit you hard. I'll bring home breakfast. I'll even buy you one of those ridiculous concoctions people try to pass off as coffee. With all the cream and sprinkles you want"  
"You don't need to buy me anything. I don't deserve anything"  
"Hey. I'll get myself the same thing, so this could be your only opportunity for revenge"  
"I don't want revenge"  
"Think about it. I'll pick up whatever you want"  
"Anna likes muffins, but Viren prefers cupcakes"  
"You're thinking about the kids. I asked what you want"  
"I want you to come home safe"  
"I'm going to do just that. I'll be waiting for your answer"  
"Ok"  
"Good. My sweet omega... that reminds me, I need to check the mail on the way out"  
Eren raised an eyebrow at him  
"What's that for? Are you expecting something?"  
Eren nodded at him. That wasn't all that surprising. Eren had become adept at online shopping which was perfect. He had the independence of going shopping and buying the things he liked, even on the days his anxieties were giving him hell  
"Well, I'm sure it'll still be there when I head down to the lobby. Now, its bed time"  
He felt like he was talking to Viren. Viren didn't love bed time, unless their son was absolutely exhausted before hand, it meant a dozen trips back to his bed, to get him to stay in bed. Now Eren was pulling the same stunt. They were running out of time, when the trial started, rest would be the furtherest thing on Eren's mind.

 

*  
Eren was still frustratingly mute as the weekend passed. He'd tried to find his words, yet each thought of facing Nick and discussing his relationship with his father, left him feeling like his throat was wrapped in thorns. It felt as if they'd stitched his vocal cords closed, so that he'd never utter a words against them. His lungs felt like they were stuffed with dead flowers, unable to take a full breath, they seemed to creak and crackle if he tried. Floch was furious at him over it, and Levi furious at Floch. An interpreter had to be sought out, though they were appointed by the court, so things shouldn't be too hard in that respect. He didn't know, but he didn't have to go into the courtroom and listen to the opening stuff. Witnesses weren't allowed into the trial until after they'd given evidence, even then, he was sure he didn't want to be there. He didn't want Nick to get away with anything, but how was he supposed to hold his fear back? Floch had pretty much stated that his breakdown with the therapist was a blow to their case. It made him seem childish and sullen. He didn't want to be childish and sullen. He wanted to be strong like Levi was.

Sitting on their bed, he was staring down the gift he'd ordered for Levi. It was two wolves, or their heads at least, that were on necklaces. It was some cheap thing, make from a cheap metal, but when he'd seen the interlocking necklace he'd wanted it. Levi was his alpha, while he was the omega. Two parts that were supposed to come together to make a whole  
"What are you looking at?"  
Dropping half the necklace on the floor as he jumped, he stupidly lunged for it, forgetting about his swollen belly. Squashing his stomach, and straining his back, he was no where near reaching the necklace half when Levi calmly walked over and picked it up  
"It's a wolf. Did you buy this?"  
Nodding at his alpha, he held his hand out so Levi could drop the pendant back into his hand. Placing it on his left hand, he aligned the second piece   
"That's pretty cool"  
Tapping on the silver wolf, he then pointed to Levi   
"It... sorry, I don't get it"  
Placing both pendants on his knees, he signed   
"I bought them thinking of us"  
"You bought them for us?"  
Levi sounded unsure  
"You're my alpha. Like an alpha wolf. Alpha and omega"  
Levi reached out and ruffled his hair  
"They're great. Which ones mine?"  
"Silver. Like your eyes"  
"And bronze like your skin?"  
Eren nodded at him  
"Do you mind?"  
It was Eren's turn to be confused. Picking up the bronze wolf, Levi unclipped the parrot clip  
"Could you lift your hair?"  
Oh. Oh. His mate actually liked his gift? He was worried Levi would find it stupid. Lifting his hair, Levi slipped the necklace around his neck, clipping it in place   
"I can't be up there on the stand with you, but think of this wolf, and think of those rings on your finger, and know I'm right there with you"  
Kissing the top of his head, Levi gave him a gentle smile as he took his own necklace and put it on  
"I should get us another set chains for these. I don't want to risk losing it. There. Does it look ok?"  
Eren nodded quickly. The silver wolf was the perfect choice for his alpha   
"Good. I wasn't sure about them"  
"Eren, they're perfect. You're perfect. I know you're scared about today, but everything will be over before you know it"  
"I feel stupid that my voice didn't come back"  
"Eren, it's ok. They have your statements. It's been entered into evidence. The jurors will read your words. They well see what those shitty arseholes put you through. They're going to know and they're going to make the right decision. You've done the right thing. You haven't said anything on social media. You haven't caused a scene or made a huge fuss out of it. You tried to get on with your life and was dragged back into the because a shit for brain pig had a little power and thought he could lie his way out of this. Now, I'm going to get dressed and then we'll head down there"  
"I don't know if I can do this. I feel like I want to scream, or vomit, or faint..."  
"I wouldn't recommend doing any of that. I'm leaving my phone home, are you?"  
"Yeah. I don't want anyone taking it off me. I've got stuff on there that can't be replaced"  
Photos and videos of Levi and Viren together. Photos with the kids. Photos and videos of Viren's birthday. Videos of him and Levi not wanting to get out of bed. All his other photos were in boxes at Hanji's still. Viren had gotten into them and damaged more than just a couple, so for now, they were safer at her house  
"Everything's going to be ok, Eren. Don't forgot that"

 

*  
The courthouse was huge and smelt of stale water. It was the kind of huge that felt pointlessly so, yet, people were everywhere. All doing all different things he'd never be able to imagine, and things he'd never be smart enough to do. Floch had met them at the front of the courthouse, talking at them a million miles an hour until Eren wasn't sure which way was up. He felt nauseous beyond belief, and way under dressed. None of his nice dress shirts covered his stomach properly, so he'd been forced to wear an overly feminine shirt that mean him feel emasculated. It felt like he was hiding behind his dynamic, but he hadn't even thought about trying to find a suitable shirt for court. Separated from Levi, he was lead to a small room. With a guard at the doorway, he was too nervous to even ask if he could go to the bathroom. Floch had said if he didn't fuck things up, he wouldn't have to come back unless there was a need for it. All this stress for one afternoon was insane... 

Without a clock in the room or his phone, he had no idea how long he'd been left there for before he retrieved... and confusingly led back to Levi. He hadn't even had to take the stand and he felt like he'd run a marathon. Standing next to him, Floch looked annoyed   
"It's alright. They've had to move witness statements to tomorrow morning..."  
That wasn't alright at all... moving to Levi's side, his mate wrapped his free arm around him. Kissing his cheek before continuing   
"... something about paperwork or something"  
Nodding, he wondered why the fuck he'd been left alone for so long  
"I think it's time we head home for now. Floch, is there any reason I can't take him home?"  
"No. You'll need to be here by 8am tomorrow morning. If you approach the front reception, they'll direct you to where you need to be. Let's pray that you've found your voice again by tomorrow"  
Even if Floch was angry, he didn't have to take it out on him  
"Eren, let's go"

Leaning heavily on Levi, he was blinded by camera flashed as the slipped out the courthouse. Knocked back into the closest glass window, he yelped at the painful elbow blow he'd taken. Clutching his stomach, he hunched over in pain, the shock greater than the radiating throb. Dropping his head, he felt like he was the one to blame for small accident   
"Hey! What where you're going!"  
Looking up, he found himself gazing into the cold eyes of Nick. The piece of shit he was supposed to be testifying again  
"Sir, we need to go"  
Nick looked him up and down, his top lip raising into a sneer  
"Watch where you're going, you disgusting waste of space"  
Walking away from them, Eren was shaking from the incident as Levi tried to take his attention from the man  
"Eren?! Eren, what's wrong?"  
Shaking his head, he needed a moment. The pups were going crazy, they'd been doing so all morning  
"Eren?"  
Holding up a hand, Levi stopped questioning him as Eren slowly realised there was no way it could have been an accident. The man had elbowed him straight in the stomach. They were clear of the doorway, nearly at the edge the top step. He'd stumbled back... Nick knew who he was and he'd intentionally "attacked" him. He'd tried to rattle him. If Levi knew, he'd lose it at him. Dragging himself up, he rubbed as his stomach   
"Eren? You ok?"  
Nodding, he let Levi pull him back against him. Opening his mouth, he tried to make the words work, but nothing wanted to come out  
"Did you trip? Or did someone knock into you?"  
He shook his head, then nodded  
"Someone knocked into you?"  
Nodding again, Levi let out a low growl   
"That's it. We're going home. I'm sorry I didn't notice it happen"  
Levi had his hands filled with Viren as it was. He didn't blame his mate for not noticing.

Guided away from the swarm around Nick, Eren couldn't breathe. He kept vomiting into his mouth. His body was covered in a fine layer of sweat, and keeping upright after seeing Nick delighting in his pain, was hard work. He had no idea how he was supposed to take the stand tomorrow. Or how he was supposed to make his ultrasound appointment. This ultrasound was supposed to a little cooler than the normal ones as it would make an actual model of their pups. He could see their tiny faces and fingers... and it'd been hard to make an appointment for it. He doubted they'd just let him get up and leave mid-testimony. Even if he was stuck mute at the moment. Especially when Nick was more than happy to come after him, in front of the media and the police. Any number of cameras could have caught the exchange, and he was lucky the man didn't have any kind of weaponry on him, or he'd be dying on the pavement rather than being in Levi's arms. He'd known this trial would be dangerous... Looking to Viren in Levi's arms, tears rushed to fill his eyes and spill down his cheeks. There was nothing stopping them from coming after his boy. Nothing stopping them from taking him away. Ignoring the pain, he reached for Viren. Lifting his son into his hold and burying his face against his hair. He smelt so much like Levi, that he himself believe the boy would be an alpha. He was fierce and brave when he wanted to be, or so very soft and timid that he was almost a different child. His laughter was infectious, as was his cheeky smile. He didn't want him mixed up in this. He didn't want that smile to fade and his little heart to be broken. Or, even worse, he didn't want his son to be broken and hurt.

Reaching the car, he fussed over getting Viren into his car seat, before climbing up to sit in the back. If he Levi had asked, he wouldn't have been able to find the right words over how much he needed Viren right then. Luckily, Levi didn't ask. His mate not burdening his already thinning frame with burden of guilt. In all actuality, Levi probably hadn't even thought twice about it, his alpha being able to read him like a book. This whole case was about omegas and their children... like him, and Viren was his son. He wouldn't let Nick have his way, and he wouldn't let Viren carry the weight of his sins, like Grisha had done to him.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is back and forth, but it's setting up the steps for what comes next...
> 
>  
> 
> Also, wetting is included in this chapter. Levi is a horny drunk, who's lucky Eren is so understanding

Needing a shirt for court, and finding none of Levi's fitted over the swell of his stomach, Eren had been quite the schemer. Levi hadn't taken the first step to reconcile things with Erwin, and their unrepayable debt to Mike weighed heavily on his mind. Mike deserved to be happy, and surely this thing between Levi and Erwin had to be weighing heavily on him. So. He'd messaged Mike and explained he needed a shirt, then asked for Erwin to drop it off so Levi would have to talk to him, and to bring a few drinks to make the conversation easier. Mike seemed to be on the same wavelength as him, as the man messaged back with a thumbs up emoji. It wasn't like Eren liked Erwin... he couldn't forgive him for keeping secrets like this, but Levi needed a friend and Erwin cared deeply for Levi, despite the current situation. He'd been by Levi's side for over two decades, he'd guided Levi through the dark times and he'd kept him on his. Erwin had probably believed that would always be the case, until he'd shown up with his baggage and stolen Levi away from him. With his good deed done, Eren flopped back into bed. His stomach was rapidly bruising from where Nick had hit him, while the pups were still moving up a storm inside. He'd already had to pee twice since they'd arrived home, and Viren had been too active for cuddles. Now the pup was sleeping in their bed, he could resume cuddling their son while Levi got some house work done... totally unaware that Erwin would arrive and he'd be forced to work things out with him. They were alphas with pride to spare. Surely they could find a way to fix things before he had to slap both of them for being idiots.

Eren was still awake when Erwin arrived. He could hear the man stuttering in the doorway, while Levi demanded to know what was going on. Climbing out of bed, he walked to the doorway, tapping on the open door to get Levi's attention. Looking back at him, Levi didn't look happy   
"Do you know what's going on here?"  
Nodding he waved for Erwin to come in   
"Eren..."  
Slipping past Levi, Erwin was armed with a black business shirt and a carton of beer. He probably would have chosen something other than beer, as it tended to make Levi horny, but this conversation wouldn't be happening without alcohol. Starting to sign, he kept his movements slow so that even Erwin could follow  
"I asked Mike if I could borrow a better shirt for court"  
Levi's lips twitched  
"I asked him if Erwin could deliver it, because I'm sick of all this fighting. Erwin. I am so beyond angry with you, and I really want to slap you. But you were Levi's best friend and right now, he needs all the friends he can get. I don't want to hear any talk about the trial, but I do want you two to talk this out. Now. I'm going to make us dinner and we are going to all sit down and eat. After that, I'll put Viren down for the night, and you two will get your fucking acts together. Even if you have to hit each other in the process. I am sick of losing people, and I will not have my alpha and his best friend fighting and dragging everyone else into this. It's exhausting. Do I make my self clear?"  
"Eren..."  
Glaring at Levi, his alpha nodded. Looking to Erwin, he nodded too   
"Good"

Darting back into the bedroom, Eren lifted Viren. The boy was waking as it was. Carrying him out to the living room, he sat him down on the recliner   
"Your job is to watch him while I make dinner"  
Levi mumbled something under his breath, earning himself another glare. Alphas were worse than omegas with their pettiness. Sorting things out between the pair was hardly how he thought tonight would go, but it did take his mind off the trial and he was grateful for that.

 

After dinner, Eren retired to bed in an attempt to give the pair as much space as possible. Viren had still been pretty sleepy, so Levi had taken over getting him ready to go. Falling asleep was easy, his belly filled with dinner and his mate was sorting shit out. It was middle of the night when Levi woke him up, his alpha's hands all over his body as mouthed at their bonding mark. Rolling his hips, Levi was basically dry humping him. Whining softly at his alpha, he found himself rolled onto his back, so Levi could claim his mouth, one hand plunging down his pyjama bottoms to see out his opening. Nipping at Levi's lip, his mate pulled back  
"You're so fucking perfect. God. I can't believe I have someone like you, Eren"  
Yep. Levi was drunk. His mate's fingertips brushing against his slicking hole as Levi pushed his lips back to his. This wasn't bad. Just unexpected... he liked when Levi was drunk, he never knew what was going to come out the man's mouth. Letting out a growl, Levi moved, pushing two fingers in without warning  
"Fuck... this pretty pink pussy of yours is so fucking wet for me"  
If Eren could have laughed, he would have howled with laughter at Levi's description of his arse  
"How do you get so wet for me? How are you so perfect? You're everything to me. Did you know that? You're my everything. I need to taste you. But I want to be in you... and I want to ride you. You have no idea how you mess me up inside. I want to fuck you, but I want to hold you"  
Reaching up, Eren snaked an arm around Levi, wriggling against his fingers  
"You want me? I'm going to make you so full, you're getting pregnant all over again"  
English really wasn't Levi's strongest forte after drinking. Nor was taking it slow. Despite the odd angle, his mate was already fucking him as hard as he could with his fingers  
"I'm going to feed from those breasts of yours while I knot you... fuck. Eren... I need you. I need to be in you. I love you. I love you so much. Did you know that? Do you know I brought a wedding ring? I want to marry you, but you won't say yes anymore. I want you to be mine. I need it. I need you to be mine... I want to bend you over in that courtroom. I want them all to know you're mine. That you're carrying my pups. Fuck... you're mine... thank you... thank you baby..."

 

 

*  
Levi was an alpha in a world of regrets. Nursing his head, his hangover was only very mild, but Eren wasn't impressed with him which made it was worse than it was. Consumed with lust for his mate, he'd suckled from Eren's breast, Eren moaning and riding him as he did. Slowing down, Levi had thought his mate was close to coming. Holding Eren down in his lap, his mate started pushing away. Without the use of his voice, his omega couldn't couldn't communicate his need to pee, Eren wetting himself in Levi's lap as soon as he'd come. Instead of finding it revolting, he pushed his mate down, riding him harder than before. Crying and clinging to him, such a vulnerable Eren was like catnip for his alpha, acting before he'd realised he'd gone too far... Overly stimulated and overly sensitive without being able to communicate it, Eren clenched around him as he covered his face. Drunk and released of his inhibitions, he wanted to make Eren feel better over wetting himself, he'd pulled out and come across Eren's wet stomach... he'd intended to wet himself, yet instead pushed back into his mate and... peed. The sensation of coming and peeing lead to one of the most intense orgasms he'd ever had. Eren so wet and full, as he grasped his stomach and whined, while Levi continued to thrust. He had his alpha to thank for that, able to come without going soft in order to breed his mate. Riding Eren fast, each time his hips slapped against Eren's arse, Eren peed a little more... shamefully, he knotted his mate... then passed out top of him.

Even more shamefully, he'd been drunk, Eren had not. Eren remembered everything. Waking up to find himself in the bathtub, he had no memory of getting there. Soaking in warm water, he didn't remember what happened the previous night until walked into the living room to find Eren in the kitchen, while Erwin was playing Viren. Obliviously, he moved to his mate's side  
"Hey, beautiful"  
Going to kiss Eren, he was pushed away with a glare  
"Eren?"  
Opening his mouth, Eren huffed with nothing came out. Standing there, his omega didn't look happy at all  
"You are an arsehole. You peed in me and fell asleep between my legs"  
"I..."  
"I was going to leave your arse in our bed, because I fell asleep with you still inside of me. But you're lucky you said some nice things last night... but no more peeing in me! Never again! I seriously felt so full I thought I was going to burst"   
That was when it all came back to him... he could feel his face reddening   
"I am so sorry. I was really..."  
"Horny. Really horny. My arse was destroyed with your dick then you pissed in me"  
He couldn't tell if Eren was starting to find the humour in the situation or not... probably not. Not when he had to testify. He was lucky to be being talked to, and if the bath was warm, he couldn't have been in there that long  
"You are... right. Fuck... Did I hurt you? Did I hurt them?"  
"My legs are sore, but because I'm nice, I dumped you in the bath when I went for a shower"  
"I am so sorry. I love you... how long do we have before we need to go?"  
They had to be there at 8am... and he had absolutely no idea what the time was...

"If you two are talking about last night, I closed your bedroom door for you. You're welcome"  
Eren rolled his eyes, so maybe he was forgiven? He'd made sure Eren was feeling into it, his love needed to get out of his own brain for a while  
"Erwin took care of Viren this morning so I could clean up. We have about an hour"  
"Is there anything I can do to help?"  
"Move the washing into the dryer when it's done"  
"Alright. You should be resting"  
"I need to keep busy. If I stop to think, I just feel overwhelmed. Go play with the children"  
"Have you two talked?"  
"I slapped him. I feel ok now"  
Reaching out, Eren let him cup his face. Rubbing his mate's soft skin, he hadn't noticed his omega was wearing make up. Careful not to destroy Eren's hard work, he kissed his lips rather than his cheek  
"That's my omega. And... I really am sorry I lost my head last night. I'm going to check that washing, then I'll get ready. I meant what I said last night. You're my omega and I love you"  
He couldn't quite remember all his drunken ramblings, but he knew he would have told Eren how perfect and precious he was... because he was... is.

 

*  
Separated from Levi again, Eren wished he could wait to be called with his mate with him. Levi might have been a drunken fool the previous night, but he was an affectionate drunken fool who didn't stop kissing him or praising his body as he touched him. He'd needed the comfort, and Levi had provided it... before passing out on his stomach and letting out a huge snore.

Clutching his necklace, he jumped when the waiting room door was knocked on. Watching the door open, the man there looked him up and down  
"Eren Yeager?"  
Nodding his confirmation, the man moved from the doorway  
"Come with me"

Led through a small hall, he was ushered through two plain doors, then he was there in the court room. His heart was racing as tried to remember what he'd been told by Floch. He had to wait before he could sit. He had to swear on an oath, though he didn't know how that would work. And... and he had to answer their questions. Despite the size of the courtroom, the walls seemed to closing in on him. Rows of eyes were all fixed on him, yet he couldn't find Levi in the crowd... Levi was supposed to be there. He said he'd be there... Oh fuck. This was it. He was being talked to... no about. They were talking about him, and the translator who was standing near the jury... They were recording everything to... He wanted to throw up on his shoes. His pups were going crazy and his stomach ached like fuck...  
"Due to the omega's fragile mental and physical state, the court has deemed it necessary that he will be giving evidence in a series of appearances, rather than forcing him to recount the details all at once..."

Hang on... What?! Since when... what? Floch hadn't said that. He'd said once he'd taken the stand, he'd be done unless he was called on again at later date. His statement was supposed to have been read already... No... Looking to Floch, the man didn't seem surprised, in fact he was smiling as if this worked in their favour. Casting his glance to Nick, the man looked just as gleeful... Could they do this? Were they allowed to do this? This didn't happen in the TV shows he'd watched...

"Eren Yeager, can you please state your full name for the court. On your right, you will find a bible, you may take your oath on the bible, or you may read the oath attached to the reverse side..."  
Shit... shit... shit... What was he supposed to do? Seeking his translator, she signed to him. Thank fuck. He could sign  
"Eren, do you understand?"  
Flinching as the judge turned his attention to him, he probably looked like a fucking moron. A useless omega that knew nothing... He nodded slowly, before the judge cleared his throat. Fuck. So nodding wasn't going to cut it... This was an awful idea... that could only end badly.

Slowly he signed his name, the interpreter voicing his letters. He would have liked to tack "Ackerman" on the end, but it wasn't legal. How anyone sat here and kept their mind, he didn't know. Taking the bible in his hands, he figured he may as well put his faith in god. He was going to need some kind of divine intervention for things to go his way. Open his mouth, he sucked down a breath. Not completely sure what he was going to do... He really should have listened closer... instead, he was again saved as his interpreter asked which oath he chose to used. Signing back "bible" he was then read the oath, then agreed. It was probably a good thing he was wearing a pad, he was sure he was going to wet to piss himself with fear... if he didn't go into labour first. Fuck. He shouldn't even joke about it, even if it was mentally...

 

*  
Levi was furious. Grabbing Floch's shoulder, he barely kept himself from growling. How could this possibly be for the best? Or in Eren's best interests. His mate was fucking terrified. Everyone had felt it when Eren was led in. The courtroom used scent cancellers, but with such a nervous and upset omega, you didn't need smell Eren to know he was scared. Nick was whispering back and forth furiously with his lawyers. Levi had been in the witness stand before, even he'd felt off kilter by it all. His omega hadn't even opened his mouth and he was being describe as weak and fragile. The jury was being swayed before Eren could say a thing... No wonder Nick looked so fucking happy.

From his angle, he couldn't watch Eren sign. With his shorter stature, he didn't even know if Eren knew he was there to support him. He couldn't feel anything from their bond, leaving him sitting there with his hand on his necklace as he held his tongue. They'd established that the line of questioning would show Eren's father's connections to the organisation, but it seemed like it had gone one step further. As Nick's lawyer took the floor, the man's argument that Grisha had the most to gain from the arrangement, and that Nick had only had the best interests of omegas in mind when he'd started his organisation. It was Grisha Yeager who'd grown greedy, the man clearly deranged as he killed Eren's mother in front of him. Hounding Eren, each question was a double edge sword, designed to slice his lover to pieces, yet designed so anyone else may interpret it as an almost innocent line of questioning. With all the talk of Eren's father, Levi sat straighter in his chair as the man started a new line of questioning. Eren's current lifestyle. If he'd been through so much trauma, how was he sitting there, pregnant, bonded, yet unmarried. He didn't know how the fuck any of it related to anything. What happened between him and Eren was their personal business  
"Floch. What the fuck is this?"  
Leaning back to answer his whisper, the blond didn't had no idea how close he was to having his head slammed against the dividing barrier bar for allowing this  
"They're attempting to discredit Eren by his lifestyle choices before we question him"  
"So what? They can practically call him a slut and you let them?"  
"They can call him that, but it doesn't change the fact you've been bonded and in a long term relationship with him"  
"We both know that means nothing. Alpha's take more than one omega all the time"  
"But you haven't..."  
"No, but we aren't married. Just engaged"  
"Wait and see, Levi. We anticipated all of this. You'll understand when Eren takes the stand for us"  
"He's not going to be able to take the stand if he's destroyed by Nick's legal team"  
"You may be his alpha, but this is my call. He will be staying up there. And he will be answering this line of questioning"  
"If something happens to him..."  
The lawyer closest to Floch, hushed them both. Floch was an idiot if he thought Eren wasn't going to break under all of this.

 

Waiting lead to Eren's interpreter bringing the line of questioning to an end. The court medic moved from being on standby, guiding Eren away from the stand. Bolting from his seat and out to the hall, Levi slowed in the public hallway as he jogged towards where Eren should be. They should have found another way for Eren to testify. Even if it'd been through a live video feed instead... anything had to be better than this. Eren wasn't a slut. He wasn't weak. He wasn't responsible for Grisha's involvements. He wasn't just an omega to be harassed by lawyers who stank of too much cologne.

 

*  
Eren couldn't calm himself down. The more they questioned him, the faster the next question seemed to come  
"How old were you when you presented as an omega?"  
"How old were you when your father found out?"  
"Did your father often get angry at you as a child?"  
"Did he display any signs of mental instability?"  
"Did you mother have any kind of affairs?"  
"Did she know about Grisha's former marriage?"  
"Would you describe the relationship between her and your father as healthy?"  
"How old were you when your father shot your mother in front of you?"  
"What happened to you after that?"  
"Did you know you had an older brother?"  
"And it was your brother's idea for you to dance as a stripper? Sorry, an exotic dancer"  
"You met your current partner there?"  
"And you two bonded? Or perhaps married?  
"It's fair to say that Grisha Yeager basically ruined your life. So why would he sacrifice himself for you? After a decade of neglect"

He couldn't stop thinking. It was all so overwhelming. They weren't giving him enough time to answer properly or clearly. Shitty tears filled his eyes as his breathing grew ragged, the lawyer still pressing on. He didn't know why he needed to explain all this. Nick had been running an organ farm, and while his father was involved, he wasn't... not like they were trying to make it sound like... He didn't want to hurt omegas. He... wasn't like that... Pleading with his eyes, his interpreter asked if he could continue. He couldn't even sign back. He couldn't remember how to sign.

Gripped by fear, he nearly hit the medic as he was led from the courtroom. He didn't want to be touched. A sickening feeling running through his skin from the hands trying to help him. He didn't know this person. They had no right to touch him, even to help him. Only Levi was allowed to touch him. No. He didn't want his mate to touch him. He was stupid. He hadn't been good. He hadn't answered all their questions properly. He hadn't even looked the man talking at him in the eyes. Not realising it his finger nails dug into his left wrist, the small about of pain felt good. Like something real and that he could focus on. 

Forced into a room that looked the same as the one he'd been wait in, he fought against the oxygen mask being forced on him. He knew the medic was talking to him, but all he could hear was the ringing in his ears from fear. He hated this. He hated his words not working and he hated his tears. He hated being made to feel weak and scared, but above all, he hated how he'd let the omega dynamic down. How was supposed to protect anyone if he couldn't handle a few tough questions!?

Presumably because of how long had passed since he was led from the courtroom, court security entered the room. Eren now appreciating the claustrophobic mask covering most of his face. His fear had slowly ebbed away as oxygen was forced into his lungs. All he really felt now was the need to make a beeline for the exit... an escape plan that had no need for an ambulance or a trip to hospital. It meant they didn't try to talk to him, instead, asking why this was taking so long, and how much longer it would take. They both seemed to think this wasn't necessary at all. He was wasting their time. Pulling the mask off his face, he placed it down, pushing himself to his feet as he did  
"Excuse me, sir. You're going to need to stay seated"  
Shaking his head, he didn't know if any of them could sign. Giving them the "ok" symbol, the closer of the two guards drew his brow  
"You're ok?"  
Nodding, he hoped that meant he was about to be freed  
"I'm afraid I must insist he isn't"  
"If he says he's ok, then he's fine to get out of here. There's no point wasting your time like this"  
Eren nodded again. Levi was outside the door somewhere... Levi meant he could go home and be safe...

 

Marched down the hallway, the guards didn't care he was pregnant. With one alpha in front of him, and one behind, he felt walled in. Both men were huge, and no doubt could snap him in half with ease. They were nearly at the doorway that opened to the main hall of the courthouse, when he was "shoved" forwards for pausing to catch his breath. Smacking into the wall, he barely kept his balance   
"Sorry about that. Wasn't expecting you to stop"  
"This is why they should keep omegas on leads. They're too stupid to learn how to be anything other than whores. And that's only good once a week, every three months"  
"Yeah. But they're supposed to get soaking wet down there"  
"Nah. They get all loose. You want them to be nice and tight"  
"Why would they even stick him up there? He can't even talk"  
"Apparently he's the son of a killer. Wouldn't know it to look at him"

The first man didn't sound very sorry, for what was clearly not an accident. Not replying to their disgusting words or continued conversation, he was "bumped" again when they reached the doorway, half falling through the door and into Levi's arms, his stomach catching taking a solid blow from Levi's hand. Or rather, he tripped with enough force that when Levi caught him, it felt like a slap to his stomach. Whimpering, his hands flew to his stomach  
"Shit, brat. Come here. I've got you"  
"Is he with you?"  
"Yes. Thank you"

Levi was thanking them? His alpha was thanking the two men who'd hurt him and insulted him. He was too upset to be rational. First Levi hadn't been there, and now he was taking their side... He had no one... No one was on his side now that Levi wasn't. Jerking out of Levi's hold, he wrapped his arms around himself  
"Eren? Are you ok? What happened in there?"  
Shaking his head, he didn't want to talk to Levi  
"Ok. I won't push, but if you want to tell me, I'll listen"  
Yeah. Well. If Levi had been there, he would have known. He wouldn't be asking like he cared, he probably didn't. He was probably off doing something else. The bitter taste of rejection hurt, but the bitter hurt of being abandoned threatened to break his heart.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drops this and runs for the hills

Keeping his pain inside, Eren knew he was slipping backwards. They'd been to his ultrasound. He'd seen the faces of his pups, and he'd seen the size of the horrible tumour on his pup's spine. At home he tried to pretend everything was normal, but avoiding Levi was hard. He couldn't communicate with Viren. His son had been causing chaos because of it, leaving him exhausted from the clean up. When Levi came home from work, all it did was make him feel worse. He'd seen the alpha the last two times in the courtroom. And they'd cleared the hurdle of background, leaving him feeling like he was the one trial. When he'd arrived the next day, reporters had shoved cameras in his face and demanded to know how he lived with himself and with what his father had done. He couldn't eat. He couldn't sleep. If he fell asleep, all he had were nightmares... so he gave up. At night he'd stare out the window, replaying the day's events non-stop on an endless loop. The judge had ordered Nick's lawyers to give him longer to reply, meaning questions were repeated, like he wasn't capable of comprehending anything. Nick hadn't liked the latest round of questioning. His lawyers weren't allowed to cut him off, meaning he could tell the court that "The Church" was actually a baby farm and that omegas were being bred so their babies could be killed. The court had erupted into whispers over this, Nick rising to yell that it wasn't true and that Eren was "a mentally unstable omega" who craved attention. He didn't want attention. He wanted to be left alone.

It was now the fourth day of the trial, and once again he was arriving stupidly early. With the flock of reporters on the steps, Floch had to step in to keep them back. Half way up the stairs, there was a commotion at the base of them as Nick arrived. In their scramble to get a comment from the man, he felt someone beside him, a whisper against his ear about Nick, before the next thing he knew he was falling badly. Trying to catch himself, he slid on the steps as his tailbone hit the polished stone of the steps. Within half a heart beat, his right ankle twisted, his left hand slid and caught the aide of his stomach against the corner of the step. Yelping in pain, Floch pulled him back up before he was ready. His whole body shaking from the shock, while his lower back felt like someone had snapped his spine and stuffed it with glass. Rushed up the stairs, Floch didn't stop to ask if he was alright, while Levi wasn't given the chance. The alpha grabbing his grazed hand once inside   
"Are you ok? Did you trip?"  
"I think he did"  
No one asked you Floch  
"You're ok then? Fuck. You're shaking like a leaf, Eren..."  
Of course he was shaking like a leaf. He could barely stand upright. Each time he tried, his back would spasm   
"We need to find the court medic..."  
Floch checked his watch  
"We don't have time. We're going to be late and Eren still needs to sign in  
"Let him be late, he just had a major fall"  
"We can't let him be late"  
"I don't care! He's hurt"  
Eren shook his head. He didn't want to see the medic again. He didn't even want Levi touching his hand, let alone the medic that kept forcing an oxygen mask on his face each time he was escorted away from the witness box  
"Eren. This is no time to put on a brave face. You had a scare and you need to calm back down"  
Pulling his hand back, he shook his head   
"Eren... you can't give a statement while like this"  
Levi sounded disappointed in him. He would rather have been hit. It would have hurt way less  
"Look. We need to sign in. Once we have, I'll notify them that he needs a medic"  
"He needs one now"  
"He could be arrested if we don't sign in. He won't be getting any help if that happens. Go take a seat in the courtroom and we'll organise this"  
"Eren?"  
What was Levi asking him for? He had no idea, so simply nodded  
"Ok. But I'll be watching, and if you feel any pain at all, you need to tell them"  
He was already in pain before they'd even shown up... Fuck it. Nodding again, he remained still as Levi kissed him on the cheek  
"I'll be right in there with you. Like I have been since day one. I love you, and you can do this"

 

Floch asked if he needed a medic once Levi had left them. Shaking his head, he stared down at his grazed palm. It wasn't too bad. The rest of him probably wasn't that bad either. It was probably all in his head. Following Floch, he signed in, then was led away to wait until his time came. He couldn't even sit when they reached the room due to his back. Despite no one else being there, he was too ashamed to stretch his screaming muscles... just in case he was being secretly filmed. This had to be another attack by Nick. Retribution for his statement, and for exposing the fact the man was a revolting piece of shit. Hissing lightly, he rubbed his stomach and begged his pups to calm. They were ok. Nothing was wrong... it was just a little bit of pain. He'd been through more before. He just had to get through his questions, then he'd ask Mike what to do. He was sure Levi had mentioned Mike would be there. Erwin still wasn't allowed into court as he still hadn't testified, but having Mike there meant Levi wouldn't be alone. Levi probably hated every second of being made to come to court with him.

Still standing and rubbing his belly, he groaned as he was summoned to make his daily walk. Maybe a medic would have been a good idea. His head was already throbbing, even before they'd left home. He'd chewed the inside of his mouth to pieces, and now he had to go out looking like a wreck. There was only so much concealer could hide, and the bags under his eyes were still visible to those close to him. Let into the courtroom, he went through the motions before sitting. Sharp pain shooting up his spine as his sides cramped. Trying to keep his face neutral, he couldn't get comfortable, wiggling in his seat like he was sitting on pins. Today was going to be a long day.

"Eren, I'd like to take you back to the night you were reunited with your father. Were you surprised to learn he was alive?"  
The same question had been asked of him at least half a dozen time, and each time he was stuck signing out that he was  
"What did your father say he his role in the organisation was?"  
"He helped deliver the children of the omega's being held at the compound"  
"During your time there, you also assisted with deliveries, did you not?"  
"Yes. My father was in charge of supervising me"  
"So you assisted in birthing these children you claim were then sold off"  
Ignoring the flash of pain through his stomach, he nodded  
"The pups were being born, it wasn't like that could be changed. All I did was hold their hands and pray they made it through the birth"  
"Yet you knew what was going to happen to them"  
"They couldn't just stay up there"  
His comment brought a few giggles, Nick's lawyer glaring at him for it   
"No. I suppose not. Still. You openly admit you helped seperate these children from their mothers"  
"It wasn't like that"  
Fuck... his stomach cramped again, so hard he nearly vomited from it   
"So you didn't help with the birth?"  
"I did. But..."  
"There we have it. Eren was just as involved in these despicable acts as his father was"  
"No. I had no option"  
"And why was that? From what I can see, you had plenty of other options. You could have run for help. You could have talked to your father. You could have fought back, but you did none of these things, did you?"  
"My father and I did. When the compound caught fire, I led the omegas and children from it"  
"Where is the evidence of this? As far as we know, you are the only surviving omega to make it from the compound. Are you sure you didn't leave them and run? After all, you yourself was pregnant? Are you sure you didn't put your own safety first? Perhaps trying to abort the pregnancy before your mate found out?"  
"Out of order!"  
"I'm sorry. I am merely trying to figure out what happened to these poor omegas he claims to have helped escape"  
A third agonising cramp passed through his stomach. His arse growing suddenly wet as he whimpered... shit... shit...  
"Eren, now is not the time or place for these theatrics. You're insulting the members of our good jury. Now, if you will set your game aside, did you, or did you not, do nothing to help these poor omegas?"  
There was kind of popping feeling in his arse. Something really wasn't right. Reaching down, he touched between his legs, his pants already growing damp. To his right the judge gently reprimanded him  
"Mr Yeager, you are required to answer the questions asked of you"  
He didn't mind the judge. They weren't as annoying after the first day... raising his hand from his lap, there was a slight red tinge on his fingers. Looking to the man with fear, he saw the judge catch sight of his fingers   
"Eren?"  
Gasping at the next cramp, he slid from his chair. His head spinning as someone yelled out his name. Something was very wrong  
"Your show is fooling no one! Why don't you admit the truth?! You knew your father was alive all along! You knew and you assisted him!"  
Yells erupted around him as he curled around his stomach. It was too soon. He couldn't be in labour because it was too soon. These couldn't be contractions because they were too close together... but they fucking hurt like they were... like he was miscarrying. He couldn't lose his pups. He couldn't. He couldn't lose them. Hysterical and unable to show it, he silently mouthed "no" over and over like a prayer, his body spasming as his muscles screamed at him to move. Above him, someone tried to grab him by the shoulders, his gut twisting so hard that he finally passed out from the pain threatening to tear him in two.

 

*  
Jumping the partition, Levi had known something was wrong the moment Eren whimpered. Around him, the whole courtroom erupted into chaos as Eren collapsed. Reaching the witness stand, he was down by Eren before anyone had a chance to stop him. Curled in a ball Eren's whole body was twitching like crazy, blood was smeared across the hard wooden chair his mate had just been sitting on   
"Mike! He's bleeding! Call for an ambulance!"  
Joining him in the witness stand, it really wasn't made for a pregnant omega, a hulking alpha and, well, him  
"We need to move him, there isn't enough space to work here"  
He was practically pushed away as Mike lifted Eren like he weighed nothing. Moving him to the courtroom floor, Mike tore off his jacket and placed it under Eren's hips  
"Levi, monitor his pulse"  
Nodding, he took Eren's wrist in his hold, kneeling beside his omega as the courtroom medic knelt on his other side  
"You. Give him oxygen. And has someone called for an ambulance?!"  
The medic nodded, clumsily fiddling with the oxygen cylinder until Mike snatched it away from him  
"An ambulance is coming!"  
At least that was something"  
Sliding the mask over Eren's mouth, Mike started feeling around Eren's stomach, though unconscious Eren's face was still scrunched up in pain  
"When did he last eat?"  
"I don't know"  
"Levi"  
"I don't know! He's been shutdown since the second day of this trial. He won't talk to me... I don't think he ate this morning, and if he did, he threw it back up"  
"Alright. Eren. Eren, it's Mike"  
Tapping Eren's face, Levi barely held back a growl. Mike was only trying to do his job, but his omega was fucking bleeding again. He knew he needed help! He knew it!  
"He fell. Mike. He fell on the steps... some report knocked into him. I told Floch he needed to see the medic"  
"I didn't see him this morning"  
Fucking Floch! Eren was pregnant! Falls weren't a good thing. And especially not falls onto his arse  
"Ok... Levi, he's going to be ok. How's his pulse"  
"Weak and thready"  
Tapping Eren's face again, his omega continued to lay there unconscious   
"Come on, baby. Wake up for me... Eren, I can't lose you..."  
Tears were already in his eyes, his whole world narrowed down to the face of his unconscious mate. Why couldn't anything go right?

 

"Levi?! Mike! Holy shit, is that Eren?!"  
"Gunther! We need to get him on the gurney. Suspected complications with his pregnancy from a fall sustained approximately two hours ago. Run a saline bag open, I'll call ahead"  
Levi was grateful Mike was doing the talking. His tongue felt thick in his mouth. The wait for help had been agonising and he was more than relieved that in a couple more days, he'd never be on the other side of this scene again  
"Levi, what's happening? Is this... This is the trial against that guy, isn't it?"  
Nodding, he knew he was in the way, but feared letting go of Eren's hand as Eld and Gunther took over Eren's care. The smears of blood were disgustingly impressive as Eren was finally moved from the floor and onto the gurney   
"Are you both riding with us?"  
"Yes"

 

Reaching the hospital, Eren was taken away from him. Mike had called ahead, and had stepped into professional mode the moment he stepped into the Emergency Department, backing away from the scene, Levi's back hit the wall, the alpha sliding down it as he buried his face in his hands. How the fuck did this happen? If he'd just... if he'd stayed with Eren... forced him to see the medic... then what? It might not have been picked up in time. Eren might not have even noticed something was wrong. He'd just had a fall... it wasn't a massive fall, but if he'd landed on the wrong angle...   
"Levi?"  
Looking up to Eld, Levi nodded, not completely sure why he did. Reaching down, Eld took his hand and pulled him to his feet  
"He's got Mike looking out for him, he's going to be ok. Why don't you wait in the staff room? Is there anyone you need to call?"  
"Erwin... has Viren"  
The court case was probably adjourned for the day as it was. His voice sounded like sandpaper to himself as he rasped out his words  
"I'll call him"  
"Thank you"  
They'd been leaving their phones at home. He wouldn't have been able to call for help... If it had been just the two of them... his alpha decided now was the time to rub his failure in his face. If it'd been just the two of them, things could have turned out even worse.

He kept his self directed rage inside, until they reached the staff room. While Eld called Erwin, Levi smacked himself in the side of his head as hard as he could. The pain well deserved in his opinion, yet failing to dislodge the train of spiralling thought. He knew Eren was hurting. He knew it. But he hadn't pushed because he was scared he was going to hear something he really didn't want to, or he was going to force Eren over the edge without even realising it.

Eld stayed until Gunther returned, assuring him that Eren was in good hands, but they both had to return to work. His omega might be in good hands, but that wasn't enough to calm him. He just couldn't stop thinking about it all. Left alone, he found himself pacing, then throwing himself down on the sofa, before hauling himself back up because he couldn't sit still. When someone finally came to find him, it was in the form of Hanji, Erwin and Viren. Taking his son from the pair of them, Levi held the boy close   
"Mike called through. He'll be down to talk to you shortly"  
"Did he say anything?"  
"No. He just wanted you to know Eren's been moved into the ICU, and he knows what's going on"  
"I know what happened. He took a fall on the steps of the courthouse. I told Floch to take him to the medic! I told him!"  
In his arms, Viren grizzled at his yelling  
"Sorry, baby. I'm sorry... shh, daddy's sorry"  
Turning his back on the pair, Levi started pacing again, this time a bounce in step as he rocked his son  
"Falls don't always result in bleeding, and if they did, Eren may have believed he was alright"  
"That's I told myself, but this is him... he's not coping with the trial. Ever since they stuck him up on the stand..."  
"Levi, it's all going to be ok"  
"You don't know that. The tumour is still growing. It's affecting the other pup. Now, he could have lost them both... he won't recover from that..."  
"Levi..."  
"I'm sorry. Can you both... just... not be here right now?"  
"Levi, I don't think it's a good idea to leave you alone"  
"Levi, he's right. You're distressed right now, but Mike will be down soon. He'll be able to tell you exactly what's happening. So how about having some faith in all of us? You're not alone. Eren's not alone. The pair of you are so damn stubborn, but we're here for you. Don't forget that"  
They could be there, but it wasn't the same for them. They weren't there each time Eren fell apart. They weren't the ones who were struggling to hold their mate together, while attempting not to let all their broken parts show  
"I... just need some time with my son"  
"Levi..."  
"Hanji, let's step out. Levi, we'll be just outside the door. Viren is alright. He's eaten and he's had a nap. There's nothing wrong with him"  
Erwin probably had to leave for his shift soon anyway. He couldn't remember how they'd made up, one minute they'd been at each other's throats and next they were sinking beers and making fun of shit movies, but if Eren had forgiven him in some way, than he had to too...  
"Thank you"

Hanji had said Mike would be down to talk to him soon, but the wait was long enough for his heart to have fallen to the base of his shoes. Viren had no idea what was wrong, only that Nanaba had brought him into the staffroom more than once for a treat, and he was having a cookie from the vending machine. No way, no how, was he missing out. Completely oblivious to the fact his mother was now in the ICU, Viren begged for his cookie until Levi finally brought him. His son more than happy to sit in his lap as he tried to eat a cookie that was as big as his face. If only everything in life could have been solved with a choc-dip, chocolate chip cookie. True to their word, Hanji and Erwin didn't disturb them until Mike came.

Walking over to the coffee machine, Mike silently waited for his cup to fill, before joining Levi on the sofa. Stretching out with a long sigh, Mike finally looked to him  
"Eren's under observation. We're keeping him sedated for now"  
"Did he... is he..."  
"He's severely anemic. His levels were rock bottom across the board in almost everything. A drastic drop from the last set of bloods he had taken two weeks ago. His levels were exceptional, but with those nose bleeds... Everything his body has is going into his pregnancy, leaving next to nothing for himself. If he didn't have such ready access to medical care, it's entirely possible he'd never have survived what he's going through. The stress combined with the fall caused him to go into preterm labour. We've stitched his cervix when drug intervention failed to slow the contractions. I've also contacted Doctor Reed. That's what took so long. She'll be here in a fortnight"  
"A fortnight?"  
Why not sooner?! His mate and his pups were in danger... and labour...  
"I know you're worried, but she can't just drop everything to come running for one patient. He's in good hands, I trust my team. Now, both pups were in distress, but we've got all three of them stabilised. Eren's going to be kept under until his systems are brought back into line"  
"So... he's stuck here again"  
"It's for his own good, and it saves him from taking the stand again. I expected thing to be bad, but those lawyers are dicks"  
"Would you believe today was somewhat tamer?"  
"Unfortunately yes. The way they're treating him sickens me"  
"Yeah. Floch's acting like it's fine, like he's got some big plan to turn Eren into some kind of hero. There's no such thing as heroes"  
"I suppose I'm going to have to talk him too..."  
"To who?"  
"Floch. He'll need a statement from us over what happened today... Eren isn't going to be able to testify any time soon"  
"Floch seems to think this trial is going to be lasting a while..."  
The last thing Eren needed was to come straight out of hospital and then to be shoved back into the witness box  
"Then I'll see if I can have him call me to the stand"  
"What?"  
"If I take the stand, it'll be easier to make the jury understand what happened"  
"I doubt he's going to let you take the stand over a fall"  
"Look. Think of it this way. Eren fell in front of the courthouse. Nick's lawyers are hardly playing fair, so maybe it's time we don't either. Even putting the idea of Eren being intentionally pushed... Well. That's not going to look good for him"  
Levi paled at Mike's words  
"Do you... do you think that could be the truth? That someone could have done this intentionally"  
Mike patted his shoulder  
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. I'm sure it was an accident. We both know that Eren's centre of balance is affected by his pregnancy"  
"I wouldn't put it past Nick... he knocked him back the first day of the trial... and I stupidly believed it was an accident..."  
"Wait. Levi. Do you really think Nick would go that far? Isn't he trying to clear his name?"  
"A snake doesn't change its spots"  
"I don't think that's exactly how the saying goes"  
"You know what I mean. If this was intentional..."  
Then what? How was he supposed to prove it? If he hadn't been two steps behind Eren, he could have stopped him from falling. He could have stopped all of this...  
"Levi... you have to move past this and be there for him"  
"I know..."  
"And you need to take care of yourself too. You look exhausted"  
Now that Mike mentioned it, he was tired. Not sleeping next to Eren left him on edge. Their apartment might be safe, but that didn't mean Eren was safe. Not from his own worst enemy, himself  
"I don't mind hooking you up to a drip for a few hours, letting you get some real rest"  
"No. Erwin and Hanji have work, you have work... Where's Anna?"  
"With Petra. Hanji's been getting creative with her babysitters in an attempt to give Eren a bit of a break. Her parents are flying in next weeks, so she'll have them to babysit. I'm sure they'll be happy to look after Viren"  
"I'm his father, he stays with me"  
"You have work"  
"I have two split shifts, then I'm done with that life"  
"Wow... only two?"  
"Yeah... like you said, Eren needs me. You... you've seen the tumour... it's hard to stay positive and with all of this happening"  
"Have you guys talked to Krista?"  
"Not in a while. We didn't book an appointment because we were waiting for Eren's part in the trial to be over"  
"I think you should. You're both going through to so much right now"  
"I'll keep it in mind... I need to be by his side"

 

Eren's stomach was littered in bruises, the omega being monitored closely for clots thrown by the bruising. They'd walked in just as the nurse was checking the pups stats. It was bad enough to make Levi's stomach roll. He wanted to cover his mate's body with his blankets, as the thin hospital gown did nothing to hide Eren's breasts or prominent swell, even after Eren was covered back up. Giving Mike a nod, the man left. With his son on his hip, the boy was still carrying his cookie. Viren teared up at the sight of Eren, sniffling out "mummy?", the cookie nearly ending up on the floor if not for Mike grabbing it before the toddler started crying   
"Eren's jewellery is in the top drawer, his heart rate plummeted, so it was removed as a precaution"  
"Couldn't you have taped it?"  
"We could have. But I was more concerned with the fact it could be lost"  
All it took was for one nurse to place the rings down, then they could end up anywhere. And it wasn't like all the machines within a hospital were metal friendly   
"Right. Thanks for that. You know, I thought I would have had a wedding ring on his finger by now"  
"Don't give up hope just yet. If Viren wants to lay by Eren, he can. Just make sure he doesn't put too much pressure on Eren's stomach"  
Levi nodded, stepping closer to his mate   
"Can we cover him up?"  
"Sure. I've got them taking vitals every half hour, so they'll be in and out a fair bit. I know you'll be watching closely, but try not to get too angry. As for his clothes, I'll take them home and wash them"  
"We owe you a new shirt"  
"It's fine"  
"He wouldn't say it's fine. He's not going to be happy about any of this"  
"No. No he won't be. What do you want me to tell Erwin and Hanji?"  
"Just an overview. Eren doesn't like talking about his health. He still thinks holding it in protects us"  
"Well, that is the way he lived for most of his life. But he's gotten better. He admitted he needed to come to hospital with his nose bleeds"  
"That was... a moment of weakness"  
Laying Viren down by Eren, their son went straight for his oxygen cannula. Grabbing the boys grabby hands, his son huffed at him  
"Mummy needs that"  
"I need to get back to work, but I'll stop by later and I haven't forgotten about calling Floch"  
"Better you than me"  
"Now, now. I'm professional, Levi"  
"Mhmm. Good luck with that"

 

*  
Hospital again. Waking up to find he'd lost another week of his life to the place was bad enough, the clock on the wall telling him as much, the date beneath the face reading the forth of February, so just a over a week. Great, it wasn't as if he hadn't missed enough time in his own life. Waking up to find himself alone was worse. Levi had been there at some point, his bed covered with a fluffy red blanket, and there flowers in the vase next to his bed. If he'd been there... Where was he now? He should have finished work by now... Maybe he was a the trial? Was the trial still going? This was the problem of waking alone. There was no one there to tell him what he'd missed out on. Shifting around in his bed, he couldn't get comfortable, he was too fat and his stomach too itchy. Though he should be grateful for both. He was still pregnant. From the way they were moving, it felt he still had both pups in there... that was more than he'd expected, and he was so fucking grateful for it.

It was another hour before he got his first visitor, Mike jumping and clutching his chest as caught sight of him, before shaking his head with a laugh  
"Jesus, Eren. You scared the crap out of me"  
Walking around his bed, Mike fiddled with the stupid beeping machine beside him  
"It's nice to see you awake. You've been catching up on your beauty sleep. We thought you'd wake up yesterday, but it seemed like you needed the rest. How do you feel?"  
Coughing to clear his throat, he tentatively tried to his voice  
"Confused"  
Fuck. Something actually came out... he wasn't expecting that   
"Well. You had a little fall, collapsed during giving evidence and then spent a week here under our care..."  
Oh... that sounded about right...  
"Le-vi?"  
"He's been here with you. I kicked him out this morning to go home and take a proper shower. He's not going to be happy you woke up without him here. How do you feel?"  
"Pups?"  
Mike gave him a very pointed look, which he forced out a gravelly answer too  
"Tired, and itchy"  
"No pain?"  
"No pain. Pups?"  
Sitting on the edge of his bed, Mike took his head. All the classic movie signs that something terrible had happened  
"Eren, you had a fall. The fall, the stress and anemia from your nose bleeds contributed to you going into labour. We stopped the labour, and stabilised the three of you. But we kept you sedated due to your vitamin levels. They were all low, and you've had a blood transfusion, but we're going to have to have a serious conversation about your eating habits when Levi returns"  
"Are... they..."  
"They're doing better than you were. Doctor Reed will be here next week, and we'll be going from there"  
"The trail?"  
His voice squeaked, Mike shaking his head  
"Rest your voice. Sign in you need to. Now. The trial is still on going. Floch wasn't happy, but I gave a statement over what had happened. Levi was furious over it all, and we've all been taking turns, so someone has always been in the courtroom"  
"Rather... talk"  
"You're stubborn. I'll give you that"  
"Lee says so..."  
"Floch is going to want to talk to you about what happens next. He still wants his legal team to cross examine you. He wants you to tell your side of things"  
"Don't want to go back"  
"After falling on those steps, I wouldn't want to go back either"  
"P-pushed"  
"You were pushed?"  
Nodding at Mike, the man growled  
"I asked Levi if he thought it was possible, and he said no"  
"He... didn't care..."  
"What do you mean he didn't care?"  
"I... didn't see him..."  
"You didn't see him in the courtroom? Eren, he practically hurdled the room divider to get to you. He was the first one to react when you collapsed"  
"D-didn't see him..."  
Dropping his gaze to his lap, he picked at his blankets as his eyes grew wet  
"Levi and I were sitting just behind and to the right of Floch so he could see you better. Do you really think he'd leave you to go through that alone?"  
No... but yes... he nodded slightly, feeling guilty as he did. Mike moving to pull him into a hug  
"He's short tempered and crass, but he was there every day you were. He's only not here now because I sent him home to rest. He wanted to stay, but he also had Viren to think about"  
"How's Viren?"  
"He's been talking to you a lot. He wanted you to wake up"  
"I want to see hi-..."  
His voice crackled before ending in a strained cough   
"I'll give Levi a call. For now, I'm going to send a couple of nurses in to get you cleaned up. No offence, but you smell as bad as Levi did"  
Nodding, there were still things he wanted to ask. Like what happened next? And if his pups were truly alright...  
"You'll here with us for a little longer, before you get any grand plans of escaping. Once Levi gets here, we'll talk more about everything happened, alright?"  
"Thanks, Mike"  
He wasn't sure if the man could hear his whisper, but Mike gave him a quick squeeze before releasing him. 

 

The only sponge bath worth having was a sponge bath given by Levi, so thankfully they were allowing him a proper shower. He wasn't allowed to walk, so was wheeled the massive 3 metres into the bathroom, the helped from the wheelchair to the shower chair. His shower was supervised, though the woman watching over him had the decency to look away. It'd been bad enough when she removed the catheter. Washing down with scent cancelling soap, he wondered why they just didn't give him his own room. He was there at least once a month... and he was lucky they weren't changing him rent for his time using their beds. Lying to himself that he felt better, all he felt was nervous over seeing Levi. His alpha wanted these pups... he knew he did, and he could have lost them. As far as he was concerned, they were worth more than his life. They were all that mattered and he was so very sorry for putting them in danger.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. This chapter took a sudden turn none of us expected... next chapter is smut.......
> 
> Fear is a powerful motivator, and stripper of higher rational thought... and Levi was fucking thirsty

Of all the days to be running late, Levi was running late on the day that Doctor Reed was finally going to be meeting with Eren over their pup's tumour. Viren had been in a bad mood all morning, the pup having come down with some kind of children's fever, that left them spending the night on the sofa. His son had fallen asleep in his arms after hours of crying, and Levi hadn't dared move on the off chance he woke him. Eren was still in hospital, still being watched for potential clots or something, while the pups were still being monitored. He knew Eren wasn't happy about it, but Reed had flown in a day early, and with the hospital trying to get him to gain weight, it was better Eren be there. Even if he desperately wanted him home. Rushing down the hall to Eren's room, Viren was crying against him. He'd tried to calm the boy down, but he wasn't having any of it. Their son hated hospitals just as much as Eren did, when there was no cookie in it for him.

Letting himself into Eren's room, he wasn't surprised that his omega and the doctor were talking. When he'd heard Eren was talking again, he could barely contain his happiness over it. If Eren was speaking, it meant his mental blocks had been lifted and he was allowing himself to use his own words  
"Sorry we're late. Viren wasn't feeling well. Doctor Reed, thank you for seeing us again"  
Rounding Eren's bed to the free side, he placed Viren on the bed as he leaned in to kiss Eren on the forehead  
"Hey, beautiful. I'm sorry I'm late"  
"It's alright. We were discussing the surgery"  
"Surgery?"  
Doctor Reed cleared her throat  
"Yes. Looking at the growth of the tumour and the effects on the pup, I've reassessed the situation. Eren as I were just discussing the finer details of how I'll be detaching the tumour, and the potential complications from it"  
"Complications...?"  
His mind was more than a little slow. He'd been so busy with Viren that he'd skipped his morning cup of tea, leaving him with too much blood in his teastream, and lacking in the mental process department  
"Yes. For instance, this is complicated surgery that may cause death, or a life of disabilities, and it just for the pups. There's a real risk to Eren's lift too. It's not my job to scare you, but I do want you to be well educated about this before going ahead. Also, Eren will be on bed rest for the rest of his pregnancy. No heavy lifting. No strenuous activities. No operation heavy machinery, etc. There is also a chance that the pup, or both may pass after the surgery. We are still able to abort, that is an option. But Eren has opted for surgery, knowing the risks"  
What now? Without talking to him?! He could die or even worse. This was something they needed to be talking about...  
"Now, don't worry. Eren may have opted for the surgery, and I was explaining the procedure to him. But he did say you two needed to discuss it"  
Then she should have as much in the beginning instead of giving him a miniature heart attack over it  
"I want the surgery"  
"Eren..."  
Climbing onto Eren's chest, Viren gripped Eren's hospital gown. Kissing the top of his son's head, Eren sighed softly  
"I want the surgery, Levi"  
"So many things could go wrong..."  
"And? These are our children"  
"They haven't even been birthed. You heard what Mike said, this pregnancy is essentially killing you"  
"And they've been monitoring me. The only reason things have been going so badly is because of the tumour. Our pups deserve a chance at a real life"  
"And what if you die? What happens then? You're too weak to be having surgery"  
"I'm not too weak. The amount of food and medication they'd been shovelling into me... I want this"  
"Maybe I should give you two some space?"  
"No. Can you please explain everything to Levi so he can see that the surgery is the best thing?"  
"I didn't say it wasn't. I'm saying... I'm saying that I need to think"  
"About what?! You agreed to this. You agreed to the surgery!"  
"That was before you had a fall and scared the shit out of me. You were in labour, Eren. Do you have any idea how bad that fall scared me?! You were out of it for a week! I thought the pups were dead. I thought you were bleeding to death! What if it happens again? What if you trip again? What if you actually lose the pups because of it?"  
"I didn't fall! I was pushed, so don't make me feel like shit for it! I didn't ask to be pushed. I didn't ask to go into labour. You were scared?! I was scared!"  
Levi felt himself pale  
"You... were pushed?"  
Running the fingers of his right hand through his hair, Eren sighed heavily  
"Eren. What do you mean you were pushed?"  
"Fuck... fork"  
"Eren, answer me"  
His tone was harsher than he meant it to be. When Mike had suggested it, he'd thought it... he didn't think Nick'd actually sink that low  
"I was pushed... someone whispered in my ear, the I was pushed"  
"Why didn't you say anything?!"  
"Because it's so fu-forking easy to say anything when everyone is hovering over you. It's so easy when the guards are making fun of you for your dynamic, and everyone finds you weak. It was so easy to speak up without a voice"  
The guards too? Had Nick paid then off? Or were they naturally arseholes?  
"Eren..."  
"This is my body Levi. I want to have the surgery because I want the pups to survive. I am so sick and tired of how people treat me. I'm sick of being in and out of hospital. I'm sick of feeling shit all the time. I want this"  
"It could cost you your life"  
"And it could cost them their's"

"If you two may, can I just jump in here"  
Both he and Eren looked to Doctor Reed  
"The aim of the surgery is for all three of you to come through alive. This isn't the first time I've performed this surgery before. And yes, the size of the pup will make things harder, but the tumour is growing, and if left, it will grow to be bigger than your pup. In the end you both need to be on the same page"  
"Can you promise he won't die?"  
"No. But I can promise you I will do everything in my power to keep Eren and your pups alive"  
Taking Eren's hand, Levi looked down at the rings on Eren's finger. Taking a deep breath, he released it slowly  
"Eren. Is this truly what you want, for yourself"  
"It's not just for me. I want these pups, and I know you do too"  
"I won't have you undergoing such a dangerous procedure, unless it is something you truly want for yourself"  
"I do"  
"And you understand things will be different when you come out of hospital? You won't be able to dance, or go walking. You'll be on bed rest. We both know how bored you get"  
"If it's for them, then it's ok"  
"You won't be able to lift Anna or play with the kids"  
"Levi. I don't want our baby to keep suffering. I don't want that tumour to keep sucking the life out of them. I could never forgive myself if something else happened to them because I didn't take this opportunity"  
Levi still wasn't sure about this. He knew the hospital all too well, and wasn't sure they had the right resources for such a dangerous procedure   
"Doctor Reed. When will the procedure take place?"  
"As I was explaining to Eren, I would like to operate in 8 days time. I would also like to have him transferred to Mitras, where my team is based"  
"Mitras..."  
The fucking capital city... He'd wanted to show Eren the city, but he didn't think this would be how it'd happen  
"And you're not going to change your mind when we get there?"  
Eren shook his head  
"Ok... ok. I guess we're doing this... you better give me all the details now... I can't believe I'm agreeing to this"  
Moving his hand in his hold, Eren pulled it to his belly   
"It's for them. It's for the pups... and for all of us"  
"Excellent. Now, Levi..."

Even after having the procedure explained to him, Levi was filled with apprehension over the surgery. They'd open Eren up, like they would for c-section, then essentially remove the pup from the amniotic sack to remove the tumour, before closing the wound with dissolvable stitches, as returning the pup back inside Eren like nothing had happened. If something did go wrong, they'd also be removing the stitch Mike's team had placed in, so if things did go wrong, Eren's body would pass the pups naturally, which was supposedly better for his omega's health and long term recovery. It was... a lot. Reed seemed confident, yet he knew better than to trust an overly confident doctor... all of this was so heavy, he could barely look Eren or Reed in the eye. If they were headed to Mitras, there was so much to organise. Accomodation for himself and Viren, as well as their flights. And then there was the trial... Floch... Fuck... He had to talk to the shitty wanker... 

Settling back against the pillows, Eren rubbed Viren's back  
"Levi. Are you mad?"  
"Mad?"  
"Because I want this?"  
Was he mad? He didn't know if was...  
"I don't know. I'm mad because I feel like you're not valuing your own life, but at the same time, I'm not going through what you are"  
"They're your children too"  
"I mean. I'm not the one having complication after complication. I'm not the one due on the witness stand to give evidence... and I'm not the one who was pushed down the stairs"  
Eren winced at his words  
"Why didn't you tell me earlier? I could have told someone"  
"Right. I wouldn't have come across as a hysterical omega who'd nearly lost his child and was jumping to conclusions to justify the near loss of the pups. Besides..."  
"Besides what?"  
"I didn't want to believe it was done intentionally. I didn't want to believe that someone out there was ok with pushing a pregnant omega down the steps like it was nothing... and I didn't want him to know I knew it was intentional. If I make these allegations out loud, I have no proof and it makes them think I'm even weaker"  
"There has to be... proof I mean. We were surrounded by reporters"  
"Where? None of them were paying attention to us once Nick arrived. I doubt whoever pushed me is going to admit it was on Nick's orders"  
"There has to be something"  
"I don't know. I'm trying not to think of the trial, but we're going to have to talk to Floch. We're going to need permission from his to travel to Mitras"  
"Permission?"  
"I'm a witness. I'm supposed to remain in Shinganshima"  
"You..."  
"He called me a flight risk, remember? We can't leave without him knowing"  
"I hate this"  
"I know. I know, and if you don't want to come, I understand"  
"What do you mean by that?"  
"I mean the capital isn't just around the corner. There's Viren to consider as well as Titan. We don't know how long I'm going to be there, or what will happen with the trial in our absence... He might say we can't go..."  
Eren sniffled as he nuzzled into Viren's hair. His whole frame sagging under the weight of his words  
"I'll talk to Floch. I'll make him understand"  
"And say what?"  
"I..."  
"He wants me up there"  
"I know he does. The whole mood of the court shifted after you collapsed. I wouldn't necessarily say it shifted in his favour, but for a short time, Nick was in a hard position"  
"We can't let him win"  
"It's not your burden to carry... I could have lost you, and I am going to make sure he damn well knows that"  
Eren bit his lip, his mate closing his eyes as he did  
"I... I'm sorry this... I'm sorry all of this has happened..."  
"Eren, it's not your fault"  
"I feel like this... this happening to our pups is my fault. Because I wasn't good enough or strong enough. I feel like I didn't give you good enough pups... and now we could lose them and the trial. I... it hurts Levi"  
"Hey. No. I love you. I love our pups. I love Viren and these two little ones. I love you all more than words can say, and I'll talk to Floch. I'll get this figured out. I won't let you be let down again"  
"And you'll be with me? For the surgery?"  
"Every step of the way. You're not alone"  
"I don't deserve you"  
Reaching out, Levi tucked a few stray hairs back behind Eren's ear  
"I'm the one who doesn't deserve a brave and strong omega like you. You make me so fucking proud, while scaring the shit out of me"  
"I don't mean to"  
"I know. Why don't you and Viren take a nap? You're both tired"  
"And you won't leave?"  
"I'm not leaving"  
"Do you promise?"  
He knew he'd hurt Eren by not being there when he'd woken, but he'd thought they'd worked through that. It seemed like all Eren's abandonment issues were coming back, and now he had a whole other thing to be scared of  
"Yeah, I promise. Get some sleep. Mike will be up later to talk to us about you going home"  
"Mmmm. I miss home"  
"I know you do. Sleep my love, and soon I'll take you home"  
Shuffling down, Eren rearranged Viren against him. The boy sleeping already  
"Sounds good"  
"Home isn't the same without you"

 

*  
Levi had been busy the last few days. He was trying to make sure everything was perfect for Eren, without being overbearing, and while playing interference to give his mate a few days break from their friends. There was so much to do. They still had to talk to Floch, though he'd left the man a very colourful voicemail telling him that he had to take Eren to Mitras or his star witness might die. The thought scared the shit out of him, and it'd taken a double shot of scotch to soothe his nerves after making the call. Today they had to head down to the courthouse, which meant getting his mate up and dressed. Cocooned under the covers, Eren was pouting at I'm. His mate not at all impressed   
"I don't see why we have to go"  
"I know. But the sooner we get down there, the sooner we can leave"  
"I don't have anything to wear"  
"Yes you do... here, why don't you wear this?"  
Holding up a white sundress, Eren sighed at him  
"I know. I know. But you're pregnant, and I want you to be comfortable"  
"Then let me go in my pyjamas"  
"It's a courthouse. We need to look semi presentable"  
"Ugh... can't you go without me?"  
"No can do. If you're not going to wear the dress, then climb out of bed already, and find something. We really do need to be there soon"

Eren made his reluctance obvious. His omega dragged himself to the bathroom, then took a small life time in there. When he emerged, his hair was pulled back into a simple ponytail with a braided along the left side of it. "Natural" look make up was on his face, and the scent of flowers wafted behind him. Abandoning the dress, Eren choose dark jeans, with a white off the shoulders top, that hung loose under the bust. The only thing his omega needed help with was his shoes, because Levi wouldn't let him wear sneakers. He wasn't going to let anyone think they could walk over his omega... who was the most stunning person he'd ever met. Not even a week ago, he'd been in hospital, and now he was on his feet again and moving forward again. Levi could only hope that things went well when they got down there, and that reporters wouldn't be covering the courthouse steps.

The drive passed quietly, Eren rubbing his stomach as his stared out the window, while Levi's stomach was turning flips over whatever was waiting for them once they got there. Managing to find a parking spot not too far from the building, he triple checked he had everything before helping Eren out the car, and wrapping his arm around his waist possessively. On the steps were a handful of reporters, but none of them seemed particularly interested in the pair of them, Eren already old news as the trial continued without his input. Grumbling, Eren still wasn't happy about it all  
"I just don't get why we had to come down here. Couldn't they come to us?"  
"I told you, Eld and Gunther needed to talk to us"  
"Yeah. But I don't remember what happened when I collapsed, other than thinking I was miscarrying"  
"I know you don't. Look, I'm sure this won't take long at all"  
"It better not. We still need to pack, and we need to pick Viren up from Hanji's"  
"I know"  
Hanji's parents loved their son. Hanji's second round of IVF had taken, though it was being kept quiet as she was literally only 3 weeks along. Her parents had flown out to give her a little breathing space and would be staying the fortnight  
"I still feel bad that..."  
"Eren, it's alright"

Making it safely to the top the stairs, Levi guided Eren through to room Eld and Gunther were supposed to meet them at. For a moment he'd worried that they'd had the wrong time, until Gunther stuck his head out the room  
"See. It's all going to be ok"  
"You're lucky they're here"  
"Yo! We didn't think you guys were going to make it!"  
Walking over to join Gunther in the doorway, the man let out a low whistle   
"Eren, you're positive glowing. Levi could learn a thing or two from you"  
Seeing Eren blush, Levi nodded   
"He's beautiful, isn't he. Is everything ready?"  
"Yep. One sec"  
Eren wrinkled his brow in confusion as Gunther disappeared, then reappeared. Opening the door, the man was wearing a tux and holding a bouquet of various white lilies  
"Le-Levi?"  
This was it... there was no turning back now.

Moving to stand in front of Eren, Levi took the omega's face into his hands  
"I know you wanted a huge white wedding. I know you wanted to feel like a prince and I promise you, you'll have that wedding. But, Eren. I am so fucking scared for our future. You are the love of my life. My soulmate and the only one who knows the real me... and I'm terrified. I'm terrified you're going to die and I'm never going to have the chance to marry you. Or to dance with you. Or to talk to you and grow old with you. I know I'm being selfish. I'm a selfish old alpha who can't let you go..."  
Shit. He was fucking crying... rubbing Eren's cheeks with his thumbs, his omega's eyes were filled with emotion  
"I'm so fucking scared, Eren. I need to marry you. I need you to be mine. I need you to stay with me and to never leave my side. I need to grow old with you, and I need... I need you to be ok... I need to marry me back and to love me like I love you. I know I'm not the best alpha in the world. And I know getting married before a surgery that... that you might not survive is cowardly, but you gave up so much, and your dream of getting married... and I want to marry you so badly. I want to marry you because I can never love anyone the way I love you. Please, Eren. Please let me legally make you mine, and me yours. As equal partners"  
Reaching up, Eren echoed his actions. His mate's hands felt so soft against his face  
"You're... an idiot. Of course I wanted to marry you. I was just so hurt that I kept denying you because you denied me. I don't ever want to feel that again Levi. I don't want to feel like I'm nothing"  
"You're not nothing... you're everything Eren. You're everything good in this world. You're my hope. I'm so scared"  
"I'm not going to die"  
Levi sniffled, his heart was racing so hard he was sure it'd give out at any moment. These didn't sound like words of Eren accepting him  
"But if I do. I want to be yours. That's all I've ever wanted. You loving me the way I love you... and you're not the only one who'd terrified... I'm terrified of dying and never having the chance to marry you... you... you're my alpha. You're the only one for me Levi..."  
"Do.. does..."  
English hard  
"I do"  
Surging up, the kiss was awkward and desperate. Gunther cracking up laughing and ruining the moment   
"You do realise you need to say that in front of the justice of the peace?"  
Breaking the kiss down to smaller affectionate kiss, Levi nuzzled into Eren's face as Eren returned the action just as affectionately. Letting out a breathy sigh, his lips were still against Eren's   
"I so fucking do"  
Snorting, Eren laughed softly   
"I love you. I love you and I need you, forever. Just don't hurt me anymore? Don't leave me alone, and don't let my demons hurt me"  
"I won't. I won't. I promise you. You'll never be alone. Never. I'd slay a nation of enemies to save you"  
"And you won't get..."  
"I won't get mad on the days you need space. I won't get mad when you're scared of me. I won't because I know you love me. I know you're still trying so hard to protect us all. I know you. I'm the alpha to your omega"  
"Never forget that Levi. I get so mad and hurt so much more when it's you. I lose my mind when you're not there. I get so scared of my attacks. I get so scared of turning out like my parents. Of being a bad mum. Of hurting Viren. I know my attacks scare him. You have to promise me you'll always protect him, and these two too. Even if it's from me"  
"Eren"  
"Levi! Please. Please... I need this. I need to know that I go out of control, you'll stop me... and you'll protect the ones I love the most from me"  
"Eren..."  
Eren sucked in a breath, his bottom lip quivering  
"Please"  
"I promise"  
"Thank you..."

In the door way, the justice of the peace cleared his throat  
"Usually people come inside the room to exchange vows. But I think we can skip that bit"  
Levi nodded at the man's words  
"Yeah. I do"  
Eren snorted, before sniffling  
"I do too"  
"Then you have some paperwork you and your witnesses need to sign..."  
"Wait. Hang on"  
Stepping back from Eren, Levi fished the wedding ring he'd purchased for his mate from his pocket  
"Can we do the ring bit?"  
Eld laughed, while Levi's hand shook. Lowering his hands, Levi slid the ring onto the tip of Eren's finger, before looking to the justice of the peace for guidance   
"The ring bit? Really, Levi?"  
"Shut up. This is important"  
"Repeat after me. With this ring..."

"With this ring, I, Levi Ackerman, take you, Eren Yeager, to be my lawfully wedded husband. I do promise this day, to cherish you as my omega, my mate, my husband, my companion, and my partner in crime and my better half. For the good times and the bad times. In sickness and in health, until death do us part"

Eren didn't have a ring to return, but Levi would have been surprised if his mate could even find his words with a massive smile across his face. Luckily, it wasn't the JP's first wedding. The man smoothly continuing  
"Eren, do you accept Levi to be your lawfully wedded husband and alpha? To have and to hold in sickness and in health, until death do you part?"  
Eren nodded quickly as Levi slid the ring up his finger   
"I do! I really... really fucking do"  
"Then, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss your husband"  
Lost in each other, they shared kiss after seamless kiss until Eld tapped him on the shoulder  
"I know you two are happy, but your son wants to congratulate you"  
Eren let out a gasp, wriggling out Levi's hold as Eld offered Viren to them. Holding the bouquet of lilies Eren was supposed to hold, their toddler looked exceptionally confused  
"Hold that pose! We need photos!"

 

After making the JP wait, Levi's heart was fluttering and doing all kinds of stupid things as he and Eren signed their paperwork. It was the night that he'd brought Eren home, after talking to Doctor Reed that he'd broken down. All he could think about was losing Eren and Eren dying. His mate had been talking in sleep almost regularly since waking, he'd call his name, he'd tell him he loved him, and sometimes he'd mention how scared he was. Everything had hit so hard... until he'd gone ahead and organised all of this. He'd told Eren that Eld and Gunther needed to talk to them, Eren automatically jumping to his collapsing, so Levi didn't bother to correct him. He knew with Eren's fragile mental state, too many people there would only lead to more harm than good, and luckily both their friends had been available as witnesses, and both had been sworn to secrecy. And secrecy over the fact he'd broken down crying on the phone over the possibility of Eren dying. While they had a mess of problems to still work through together, he felt more confident about it now that Eren was finally his husband. He felt invincible. He felt like screaming it. And he felt like everything would work out... His nightmares, Eren's nightmares. His panic attacks, Eren's panic attacks. His anxieties and Eren's anxieties. Together, maybe things would work out...

Bullied into letting Eld watch Viren for the night, Eren was giggling as Levi pulled him close and promised him a wedding night he'd never forget... to which, Gunther announced was way too much information for small ears. Once Eren had the surgery, the wouldn't be able to be as physically intimate as they had been... and everyone knew it. Sure, there was still a few days until they left, but Eren was at a plateau with his anxieties. They'd only grow as the surgery grew closer... it'd been part of the reason he hadn't waited until the last moment to marry his mate. Hugged by both their friends, Eld and Gunther both wished Eren luck with his surgery. Eren getting teary and sobbing out his thanks, before finally letting Levi drag him away.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The wedding night... smut... mmmmmmm.... with a touch of that request again

Stumbling into their apartment Eren's hands were all over him. The drive has been nervous and filled with sexual tension, both of them itching to get home. Barely in the door, Levi was being shoved back against it, Eren's lips against his as his husband tore at his shirt. Growling, Levi flipped their position, slipping a knee between Eren's legs, as he rutted up against him. His lips trailing down from Eren's lips, nipping and biting as he latched onto his husband's neck  
"My husband. My beautiful husband... God... Eren... all mine... I need you..."  
"Yes! Yours! Your husband... yours Lee..."  
Moaning as he exposed his neck, Eren's hands grabbed his hips, pulling him as flush to him as he could get  
"I love you... I love you so fucking much..."  
Whining at him, Eren bucked back the best he could   
"Bed... need you, Levi. Need you so bad. My heart's going to burst..."  
"My husband. You're so perfect... love you. Love you so much... going to make you feel it..."

Lifting Eren by his arse, he carried his mate through to their bedroom, his omega giggling beautifully as he struggled not to drop him. Falling into bed together, his omega climbed into his lap, grinning as he pinned his hands about his head   
"My husband. I fucking love you... I love you, Levi. I love you so much"  
Unable to lean over to kiss him properly, Eren let out a frustrated whine. Reaching up, Levi dragged the pad of his thumb over his lips  
"Let me take care of you, my husband"  
Pushing his thumb in, Eren rolled his tongue around the digit, sucking eagerly, before pulling off with a wet pop  
"No... no, I want you in my mouth. I want to taste you Levi... to many clothes... need you naked... need to see your body..."  
Fuck... fuck... his husband was way too good to him. Wriggling down, Eren ripped his belt undone with a snarl. Moaning at the freeing of his tenting erection from its confine, Eren licked his lips, staring down at his dick   
"You're so fucking big..."  
"All for you, Eren. Only you..."  
"Mmmm... my husband... Levi... there's so much I want to do to you..."  
"Whatever you need, baby. All of its yours forever"  
"I want to taste you... will you... ride my face?"  
Oh fuck. He was fucking screwed. Groaning, he nodded quickly. Eren's smile so wide that Levi felt himself choking up on emotion. All of Eren was his. Legally his...

Fucking himself on Eren's tongue and fingers, it wasn't enough. He wanted his omega inside of him... rising off Eren's face, his husband's fingertips dug into his hips. Beneath him, Eren's bare breasts and stomach wobbled each time he rose and fall. Deprived of his clothes, slick ran free from between Eren's lags, he could see the wet patch forming beneath them... and the smell... the smell was incredibly   
"Leeee..."  
"I'm going to ride you so fucking hard. Feel you fill me... you want that, baby?"  
"Fuck yes... fucking going to fill this arse of yours so good"  
"Mmmm..."  
As seductively as he could, he climbed down Eren's body, running his tongue along Eren's salty skin. Slapping him on the arse, Levi let out a growl at his mate. Slapping him again, Eren groped hard at his smarting cheek   
"Your arse is so fucking hut"  
"It's going to feel even hotter around your dick"  
"I'm not going to be able to last... your too... arousing... fuck... look at you Levi, you're fucking gaping..."  
Rubbing his thumb over Levi's opening, Levi tried to shoot Eren the best serious look he could. Laughing, Eren took his hand off him  
"I'm behaving"  
"Really? I hope you don't plan on spending the whole day behaving? I was looking forward to wrecking myself on you"  
"Oooh... is my husband getting demanding?"  
"You're married to me. We've got a certificate and everything"  
"And I can't return you either... we didn't get a receipt"  
"Damn... what shall we do?"  
"I don't know... I always make sure to get a receipt with large purchases"  
Finishing his climb, Levi crawled into Eren's lap, placing a hand on Eren's stomach as he guided himself onto his husband's erection. Moaning at the burning pleasure, he sucked a breath down as he rolled his hips. God... Eren felt so right  
"This is... is... a pretty large purchase right here"  
"You brought yourself a whole damn family"  
"My family. My husband... filling me so good... never ever letting you go"  
"Mmm. Destroy our marriage certificate and proof... never going to... to let you return me"  
"Never, Eren... never..."

Riding Eren, he loved holding his mate's stomach in his hands as he did. He loved the way it moved, and the way Eren panted for breath  
"Lee... Lee... let go..."  
"Not letting go..."  
"You're pushing on my bladder... need to... pee..."  
Pushing harder, Eren's hands scrambled to fist their blankets. Wriggling and moaning, Eren shook his head   
"Lee... don't... please... please... I need... need the bathroom... need to... stop... agh... agh..."  
"Want it Eren... want you to come..."  
He was so fucking close, his dick trapped against Eren's stomach and driving him crazy. Sliding his hands up, he cupped Eren's breasts, starting massage and drawing a gasp from his mate as he pressed his whole weight against Eren's swollen stomach   
"Le... Levi... oh fuck... Levi! I'm... ah... fuck... I can't... I can't stop..."  
Wh... oh... fuck... feeling hot wet warmth gushing into him, Levi's orgasm hit. Clenching around his omega, he moaned at the feeling of being filled. He shouldn't find this so good... but he might need to admit that this... this might be a kink. He'd never minded Eren losing control like this... he took to be a sign of complete and total trust... coming down from his orgasm, he rubbed at Eren's stomach, leaning down to press kisses to the stretched skin  
"Levi...?"  
"Love you, Eren. I love you so much..."  
Letting out a small hiccup, Eren sniffled. Levi sitting back, one hand rubbing Eren's stomach as he rubbed his own slight distended swell   
"I pissed..."  
"I know... you filled me... so full..."  
"I... I'm sorry"  
"Don't be sorry baby... don't be... I came so fucking hard..."  
"It's dirty... you don't like dirty things"  
"I like the dirty things I do with you"  
Rolling his hips, he felt piss running from his wrecked hole  
"Lee... too much..."  
"Ok baby... shhh, you're ok. You're so good to me... hold on baby"

Reaching over to the bedside table, he fumbled the black plug from inside if it. Sitting back up, he pushed the toy into himself as he slid off Eren, stopping the spillage. Climbing from Eren's lap, he crawled up to lay beside Eren. Reaching out, he forced his omega to look at him  
"I love you, Eren. I love you. I love trying these things with you. I love being filled by you and I love seeing you so full..."  
"You're not mad"  
"No. No. I'm not mad... because now..."  
Leaning in, he kissed Eren softly  
"... now, we can continue this in the bathroom. I put a ring on your finger, now I'm going to put my fingers in yours"  
"Lee... that's terrible"  
"I'm a terrible person"  
"No you're not... you... actually love me"  
Rolling to face him, Eren sighed softly  
"I'm so scared of going to Mitras. I'm so scared of losing them... I'm scared I'm going to... I'm going to close my eyes and never see you again..."  
"Oh, brat..."  
"I love you, but... I'm so scared"  
"I know you are. Hey, I know. I'm fucking terrified too... I know I sprang this on you... and I know it wasn't the big wedding you wanted, but I didn't want to miss... I didn't... I love you"  
"I know... I swear it's... like you can see my fears when you look at me"  
"Maybe a little... Do you want to take a shower now?"  
Eren nodded at him  
"With my husband"  
"Yeah. I'm all yours"  
"You're so perfect, and so precious. Once the trials over, we'll plan that mammoth wedding. With as much silver and white as you can stomach, and so many lilies we'll smell like them for months. And Viren will be the ring bearer. Anna the floor girl. Hanji will carry the twins down the isle... Mike will be the best man... and Petra will sulk next to Olou. And when you come down the isle, I'm going to look so fucking constipated you'll laugh at me..."  
"You... really thought about it"  
"I wanted to plan a huge white wedding for you, but Hanji said you needed space and time after how badly I fucked it all up... She was pretty upset you don't want to wear a dress"  
"I... feel like I can be... a guy again... because you make me feel it's ok"  
"As long as you know you can wear whatever you like. I don't mind if you want to dress like a girl, or like a guy or an octopus. You are you and I love you"  
"I love you... it hurt so much thinking you didn't want me..."  
Pulling Eren up against him, he rubbed his mate's back. The plug shifting and pushing in places that really didn't need to be rubbed given that now he wanted to be less full  
"I know. And I know these past four months have been nonstop, but I'm not leaving you behind or letting you go"  
"And I won't let you go either. Even on my bad days"  
"Our bad days suck, but we're together. Let's get you showered? Then we can have something to eat. We still all afternoon, all night and all morning to enjoy each other"  
"That's a lot sex"  
"I'm sure I can think of a few other things we can do..."  
"Mmm... my gorgeous alpha husband, you're so smart"  
"You don't even know what I'm thinking"  
"No. But we're married now... I think I can give you a little leeway"

 

Levi kept the plug in his arse until the pair of them were in the shower. Placing his hands against the wall, he spread his legs and rose to the balls of his feet as he pushed his arse out. Running his fingers down his back, goosebumps erupted under Eren's touch  
"You look so good like that... it almost makes me want to keep the plug in there..."  
"I think it's time it came out"  
"I said almost... are you ready?"  
"Yeah... do it"  
With loving care, Eren slid the plug from his arse. Feeling himself shudder as his stomach flattened, mess ran down his inner thighs, racing to join the water swirling down the plug hole  
"I need to clean you out..."  
"I can do it..."  
"I want to take care of my husband... and this arse of yours..."  
Roughly fucking him with his fingers, Eren knew what he needed. When deemed clean, the omega pushed the plug back in, teasing his twitching opening with the tip, before pushing it in with one smooth move. Sinking down to his knees, Levi was confused until he felt Eren run his tongue over his slightly bulging opening, before kissing the taint pink ring around the toy  
"Eren..."  
"It seemed a good idea at the time, but I think I'm stuck"  
Laughing, he turned. Eren on his knees and staring up at him like he was the most innocent little thing in the world  
"You look so pretty like this"  
"Do you want me to make you feel even better?"  
"I want to touch you... come up here, the tiles are too hard on your knees"  
"My worried husband"  
"I feel like every time I take my eyes off you, you get yourself in some kind of trouble"  
"And what kind of trouble am I in now?"  
"You're in dangerous trouble of being knotted"  
"Am I now?"  
Helping his omega back to his feet, he slipped behind Eren and nudged him to take the same stand he had. Running his hands over his mate's hanging swell, he rutted up against Eren's arse as his husband whined for more  
"If it gets too much for you, let me know. My body can take more than you can right now, and as much as I want to breed the absolute fuck out of you, you and pups come first"  
"I'm already pregnant"  
"I know, but you're so swollen and heavy"  
Rolling his hips, Eren's arse was thoroughly soaked, Levi fucking the cleft between his mate's cheeks slowly  
"Stop teasing me... I want you"  
Pushing against him, Levi released Eren's stomach to take his hips, sheathing himself until he was balls deep. 

Slowly fucking his husband, Eren incoherently begged for more. With his hands massaging Eren's breasts, his omega had already come, while Levi was enjoying every mew his over stimulated body made. He'd already planned not to knot Eren in the shower, it safe for his mate, but he was having trouble not just letting go. Everything felt amazing. Everything new as they experienced it all over again, but now as husbands. Biting his lip, he watched himself wrecking Eren's soft pink opening, the sounds of wet slick barely muted by the running water. Clenching and rippling, Eren let out a long groan  
"Come for me baby"  
"Want to come with you..."  
Pulling out, Eren cried out at the loss  
"Push your thighs together for me"  
"Lee..."  
"Trust me"  
Nodding, Eren did as he was asked, Levi pushing in between Eren's thighs. Taking Eren's dick into his hand, he rode his mate harder, Eren panting hard  
"I'm going... going to..."  
"With me... me too"  
Coming between Eren's legs, Eren came across his hand, resting his forehead against his mate's back he peppered kisses as he tried to catch his breath, practically holding Eren up by his dick as his mate slumped   
"Fuck, baby... you're so perfect..."  
"Lee... I need to... pee again..."  
"You're ok. You're ok. Let it go..."  
"I can't..."  
"You can... we're in the shower"  
"I..."  
Letting himself piss, Eren let out a whimper before peeing. Both streams running down Eren's legs as his omega shook  
"You... you... you peed on me"  
"You didn't seem like you were going to pee on your own"  
"But..."  
"Eren... I don't mind. Getting you out the shower and back in is far more dangerous than peeing. You've come so far... and you never need to be embarrassed over your body"  
"But peeing?"  
"I think it's kind of hot... you letting go like that..."  
"Is this some kind of alpha thing? Peeing on me to make me yours?"  
"No. No. It's a you thing. I don't want you to be embarrassed. And now that I have, I get to touch every single glorious inch of you as I clean you"  
"You're too good to me..."

 

*  
Sitting on the sofa wearing a shirt and clean underwear. Eren still couldn't believe he was Levi's husband. Waiting for his alpha, he could hear his husband grumbling about something  
"Just put something on! I'm the only one here"  
As it was, the shirt barely covered in his stomach, and he'd skipped putting a bra back on... with the hopes that his alpha would finally knot him. It was weird to feel so damn happy, especially when he'd been so scared about the upcoming surgery. He'd tried to act tough through it all, but Levi had made that endeavour useless  
"I'm coming! But what they hell are these?!"  
Walking out their bedroom, Eren clamped a hand on his mouth to hide his giggle. Wearing a pair of wolf printed boxer briefs, they'd been a gag gift from Hanji  
"Are you laughing at me?"  
"Me. What? No..."  
Coming over to stand in front of him, Levi's dick filled out the wolf's snout. Shaking his hips, the wolf moved as Levi moved  
"Are you laughing at my wolf?"  
"Oh no! I would never laugh at a big bad wolf like you!"  
"This big bad wolf has his eye on you"  
Unable to stop his laughter, Eren broke down  
"Oh, please, Mister Wolf! Please don't eat me! I'll be good!"  
"But what if I want to eat you?"  
Jumping lightly, the wolf move again. He couldn't even try to be serious about this  
"No! I'll be good! I'm too thin to be good eating!"  
Climbing up to kneel over his lap, Levi slipped his hand down his underwear, moving the wolf as he growled  
"I think you look pretty tasty to me"  
"Please, Mister Wolf! My alpha is possessive! If he comes home to see you like this, he'll take it the wrong way!"  
"With you so swollen and fat with pups... I'm going to eat you up"  
"Noooo!"  
Levi pulled his hand from his pants, tickling Eren's sides as Eren howled with laughter   
"What was that?"  
"Mister Wolf! Noooo! I have an alpha!"  
"I don't see this alpha... what kind of alpha leaves a sweet little treat like you, sitting here"  
"He loves me! He'll be back soon!"  
"Then I better make this fast!"  
Recovering his breath as Levi stopped tickling him, he reached out and cupped Levi's junk. Trying to act coy and kept his face straight, he fluttered his eyelashes  
"Mister Wolf, you're so big"  
"All the better to fuck you with"  
"Mmm... so long and thick..."  
Rubbing harder, Levi leaned down to kiss him  
"Mister Wolf!"  
"Fuck your alpha. I want you, my little wolf. Want you right now"  
Moaning into Levi's mouth, it turned into several long hard kisses, both moaning and panting. When the kiss broke, Eren's underwear was soaked with slick... dizzy with arousal up until he looked at that damn pair of underwear again. Taking Levi's hips, he pulled his groin to his face, kissing the forming wet spot on the wolf's nose  
"I want to be full of your pups, Mister Wolf... full and heavy... I'm going to birth you a whole fucking litter in our nest"  
"Fuck yes... that's my wolf... my omega to my alpha. Get your hands and knees... going to knot you so bad. Going to plug you and keep my seed inside you... mark you as mine and then let's see what your alpha thinks"  
"Oh, so the big bad wolf doesn't want to eat me?"  
"He could spend the rest of his life eating you out and it wouldn't be enough"  
"He could at least build me a house first"  
"It was the little piggies who built the houses"  
"And the wolf, who did a whole lot of blowing..."  
"How the fuck did I get so lucky to as to married to you?"  
"I don't know... I'm the lucky one... so don't tell my husband"  
"I won't. If you don't tell mine"

 

Disappearing into their bedroom, Levi had reappeared with a condom, and the biggest plug they had. His arse was stinging from the spanking Levi had given him, after lavishing attention on his body, Levi had drunk him dry as he'd used his fingers to abused sweet spot while sucking him off, until pleasure turned to torture. Hips his heavy and numb as his taxed body fell limp, with absolutely nothing more to give. Using the condom as a cock-ring, his mate had moved him to his knees, spanking his arse before finally mounting him. Eren love drunk from everything happening. It was all too much, and still, he wanted more. Each touch of Levi's fingers lighting a fire beneath his skin, until he felt like he was melting into his mate. Coming so hard he passed out, Levi repositioning him to his lap. Even in his sleep, his smile didn't fade. He was a happy, purring leaking mess. 

When he'd woken, Levi had helped him to the bathroom, before they'd returned to the sofa, Eren kneeling, mewing and whining as his husband drilling him thoroughly, coming inside of him with out knotting him, then plugging him as he said he would. Too exhausted to move, Levi pulled him down into his lap, pushing his knot deeper as his alpha nuzzled into his neck  
"Are you ok?"  
"Mmmm... sleepy"  
"Then take another nap. I'm here with you..."  
Interlacing their fingers, Levi let out a purr of his own. Eren's overwhelmed emotions sending him into tears over the pure sound  
"... When my knot goes down, I'll order food. Whatever you want..."  
"I want to cook dinner with my husband"  
Levi laughed softly, as if he was actually joking   
"You want to cook? On our wedding day"  
Nodding, Eren blindly kissed the side of Levi's head  
"I want to cook, with my husband before I'm on complete bedrest... I want to dance with my husband... I want... I want to make memories with you... in case..."  
In case he bled out on the table and never got the chance to dance with his husband. Levi's purring stopped  
"Eren. No. Not today. Don't think about Mitras"  
"Viren..."  
"Will be just fine. I'll be watching him, and we'll do things all the thins you want together... You didn't seem this scared when you agreed"  
"You'll take care of him right? I didn't want it to show... I... I know how much they mean to you"  
"And you mean even more... and you're going to be fine... all of you. And these two little ones too"  
"I'm so proud to carry them... even with... with everything, I'm proud"  
"I'm proud of you too. And when you come home, we'll make this work. You and me. Us as a family..."

Falling silent, Eren was nearly asleep when Levi nuzzled his nape and shifted. Rubbing his stomach, Levi nipped on his shoulder. He was boneless, but sleep kept eluding him. His stomach let out a loud gurgle, which would have caused him to laugh if he hadn't been so sleepy  
"You're all going to be fine... and what are we having for dinner?"  
"I hear wolves like meat"  
"Mmm. This wolf is more than happy to keep eating your meat. I'm not going to live this one down, am I?"  
"No... but don't throw them out"  
"Oh?"  
"Mmm... how much sex have we had?"  
"A lot"  
Eren snorted through his nose  
"I'm supposed to be resting"  
"Do you not feel rested?"  
"No... I feel the good kind of exhausted... but spent. I think my dick's broken"  
"You'll have plenty of time to rest over the next few days. I want you to take it easy"  
"Says the man who's still got his dick up my arse"  
"It's a great arse"  
"And you have a great dick"  
"Thanks, I grew it myself. Are you comfortable, do you need anything?"  
"No... this is nice. I still can't believe we eloped"  
"I'll make it up to you"  
"That's too much to think about... take a nap with me?"  
"I'm not going anywhere"

 

*  
Taking another shower together, Eren could barely stand from the feeling of pressure across his hips. Levi lifting him onto the kitchen bench when it finally came time to cook dinner. The plug still firmly in his arse, as that was the only thing Levi had asked of him. Sitting on the counter, Levi handed him the cook book  
"What should we make?"  
"What are you in the mood for?"  
"Whatever you want"  
"I don't think you can eat that"  
"I could eat you up"  
"God. Down boy. I'm starving"  
It was the first time in a long time had an actual appetite  
"I'll get your pills, and a protein bar. Why don't you think about what you want?"  
"Could we cook that pasta dish you made? The one you made when I moved in..."  
Levi raised an eyebrow at him  
"That was nearly 4 years ago..."  
"It was chicken and broccoli... you said you were a horrible cook, but to me it was the most delicious thing I'd ever eaten"  
"You remember?"  
"I could never forget..."  
Taking the book back from him, Levi had to tip toe to reach his lips, giving him a quick kiss and a loving smile  
"Alright. I know we have broccoli, but I'm going to have to check the freezer for chicken"  
"Mmm. Look at you, so domesticated"  
"I've always been domesticated. You just smoothed the rough edges"  
"This is true"  
Stealing another kiss, then kissing his stomach twice, Levi moved to open the fridge  
"Do you remember what the sauce was?"  
"Just some grated cheese"  
"That's easy"  
"You're not all that complicated"  
"We can't all have a million secrets, like you do"  
"Mhmm..."  
He knew he had secrets that were safe to tell Levi, but he also had secrets he'd never tell... not when it'd do no good for Levi to know them. Sensing his slight drop in mood, Levi abandoned the fridge, moving to place his hands on Eren's knees   
"Hey. No. I don't mean it like that. What I mean is, learning to love someone has opened up a lot of things for both of us. But it brought it us here. There's no such thing as happy or easy life, but I find happiness with you"  
"I didn't mean..."  
"No. I didn't mean to. You're my husband and I love you. No matter what. Ok?"  
"I know. Sometimes my head gets... busy... and reminds me of stuff"  
"Yeah. I know. But this is our wedding night"  
"So let's enjoy it?"  
"Exactly"

 

After dinner came slow dancing in the kitchen as Levi hummed. Eren was still slightly peeved that his husband could sing, but it was nice to know he still couldn't dance. Trying to act suave and dip him. Initially terrified from the motion of falling, Levi rushed to pull him back up when he realised things hadn't gone right. It wasn't until he was safety standing again that Eren's laughter bubbled up in relief. Levi nearly tripped over his own feet, as he backed away from his laughing husband   
"It wasn't that funny"  
"I know... you scared the crap out of me"  
"I was trying to be romantic"  
"I know... just the look on your face"  
Sulking, Levi crossed his arms. The tips of his lips betraying him   
"Ok. I'm sorry. After the pups are born, I want to return to dancing. I haven't even been able to do yoga with all the complications... do you think you'd maybe like to come with me?"  
"I think we both know I can't dance"  
"I think we both know, that I love you how you are. If I can marry you, you can dance"  
"It doesn't work that way"  
"I don't know. I feel incredible. Like I can do anything, and it's all because of you"  
Levi's face lit up, his alpha scent flooding from him. He could drown to death in that scent and die a happy man  
"If you feel like you can do anything, do you feel like maybe practicing some horizontal dancing?"  
Reaching out, Eren took Levi's hand  
"I thought you'd never ask"


	23. Chapter 23

Holding Viren, Levi was pacing back and forth in the family waiting area. Eren had already been in surgery for 8 hours, and he was still yet to hear anything about his husband's health. Doctor Reed had suggested he wait back at the hotel, and that she would call when the procedure was over, but Levi couldn't bare to bring himself to leave. He didn't want to be unable to get to Eren in time... 

Hushing Viren as he started wake, Levi wished someone would pick him up and carry him around. He was dead on his feet, but if he sat, he'd never get back up. Eren hadn't had a great flight down, due to a panic attack that had resulted in him sedated. When he'd woken at Mitras Royal, his husband had been severely disoriented and groggy. He'd begged Levi to take him home, and grown agitated over the lack of rings on his finger, taking hours to come back to reality as the drugs left his system. Having spent the whole night before Eren's flight at the hospital with his omega, then going straight to spending a flight being serenaded with Viren's stunning "operatic" vocals, and topping the trifecta with a terrified Eren, Levi was tired, smelly, exhausted to the point of nausea and nursing a headache greater than Viren's ability to scream. He knew Viren couldn't help the pain in his ears that came from flying, but out of everyone on the plane, only one little old beta woman had been happy to help. The rest of the passengers getting mad at the three year old for something he couldn't help or understand. 

By the twelve hour mark, Levi was wondering if they'd forgotten he existed. He'd given up pacing, thanks to his knees threatening to give out, and thanks to having to take Viren to the bathroom, and for food. His paranoia left him wondering if they'd come to find him, then found that he wasn't there and assumed he'd left. His arse was numb, his back hurt like a bitch and his eyes burned from a lack of sleep, but there was no way he was going home.

16 hours after kissing Eren goodbye as he wheeled away, Doctor Reed finally came to find him. The woman looked as bad as he felt  
"Levi"  
Rising to his feet, she gestured for him to sit. Levi's heart was hammering as he did  
"How... how is he?"  
"It was a hard and difficult surgery. Separating the tumour wasn't easy..."  
Oh god... oh... fuck... this was it... Eren had... he was... Levi's eyes filled with tears, Doctor Reed placing her hand on his shoulder   
"... and we were unable to remove the entirety of the tumour, however, we did remove over 80 percent of the tissue. Now. There were some complications, extending procedure time. The pup went into distress which is why we didn't remove the tumour in its entirety, the second twin then slipping into distress from the extended surgery..."  
Reed paused, Levi was getting over these pauses real fucking fast  
"Eren?"  
"Eren crashed on the table, suffering a major bleed as we were closing. We closed the bleed, and got his heart back into normal sinus rhythm, but we've placed him in a medically induced coma to relieve the pressure on his body. The next 48 hours are going to be critical. We'll be monitoring both pups very closely, as well as Eren for clots, preterm-labour, or secondary bleeds. We won't know if there are any lasting effect from the bleed, until he wakes"  
Levi felt as if he'd been dumped into an ice bath. His stomach clenching so hard that vomited into his mouth   
"Now. I know you're anxious to see him, but we have him a sterile room to lower risk of infection, and we will be keeping him under until we are absolutely sure he is strong enough to be brought back out. You need to go home and rest"  
Rest... how could he rest?  
"I know everything I said is scary, but it was nothing outside the realms of possibilities we knew may occur during this procedure. I'm also not sugar coating it, because I know you'd be insulted if I did. So the best thing you can do for Eren, is to go back to your hotel and rest"  
"I want to see him"  
"That's not currently possible"  
"I... I don't care if I can't talk to him, I need to see him... he's... my husband"  
Reed took a long breath in through her nose  
"Please. I need to see he's out of surgery"  
"You won't be able to communicate with him, and the amount of equipment surrounding him may be alarming"  
"I know. I'm prepared for that. But I still need to see him. We've come all this way. He's in a city and hospital he doesn't know. Having a surgery he was scared shitless over, and now you tell me he died on table. I need to... see him"  
Reed softened  
"I can give you a few minutes, but you have to promise me you'll rest"  
Levi nodded quickly  
"Alright, come with me"

 

Forced to stand on the outside of the room, Eren was locked away from him. His omega's room was directly across from nurses station, which was generally reserved for the riskier of patients. Normally doctor's liked their patiences to come out of anesthetiser naturally, but there Eren was. Surrounded by monitors, his stomach bare and other than the small sensor pads placed across his swell to monitor the vitals of their pups. Levi found no relief at the sight of Eren like that. He looked too thin, and far too pale  
"Levi?"  
Blinking, he realised Reed had placed her hand on his shoulder again  
"My team is the best on the whole island. He is in very good hands here"  
"He looks like a doll"  
"He may be pale, but he did just go through a 13 hour procedure. Even unconscious, surgery is a heavy burden on the body, and there is a risk of infection. Being in a coma is the best thing for him right now"  
So they had left him waiting... They'd left him to stew in his own misery  
"He'll wake up again, won't he?"  
"We have no reason to doubt he won't once the drugs are weaned from his system. He will be weak, but if all goes well, he'll be home by the 28th"  
Levi nodded, swapping Viren to his opposite hip. He and Eren had married on the 13th, it was now the 17th or was maybe even the 18th... Eren was due to remain in Mitras until the 21st, then to be transferred back to Shinganshima. He didn't see Eren being home by the 28th, nor did he see him testifying on the 6th of March like Floch had organised... Eren wanted to take the stand as it would be the states lawyers questioning him this time, and giving him a chance to explain his life in his own words. Floch was sitting on the pushing incident, which left Levi furious, yet the man had restated that he had a plan  
"Now. The best thing for you is sleep"  
Levi nodded, he didn't want to take his eyes off Eren. The three rings and the two wolves he wore around neck felt incredibly heavy, almost like a hangman's noose. If anything else were to happen... he'd lose his head   
"Thank you... and thank you for... for saving them..."  
"You're welcome. I never promised this would be easy, but we all came through the other side in one piece. Are you alright to get home from here?"  
"Yeah... yeah, I've got it covered"  
"Then no doubt I'll see you soon"  
"Thank you..."

 

Back at the hotel, Levi crashed hard. Getting Viren, and himself, showered and changed used up the last of his energy reserves. Turning the TV on and setting it to low for the background noise, he pulled his son into bed with him. Viren wasn't a happy camper, not after a whole day at hospital with being able to run and play, but Levi wasn't about to let him go loose in a hotel room, even if the door was weighted and chained. He needed the soft warmth of his son against him. He needed to know he was safe, no matter how many whines and grabby fingers to the face he took in the process.

Sleeping came easy, the hard part was when Viren woke him early demanding food. The boy had somehow rid himself of his nappy, and pants, and all managed to make one hell of a mess of their hotel room. Ordering room service, Levi was ready for another however many hours of sleep he'd gotten. Chasing Viren down and getting him back into a pair of pants, his son promptly pulled them back down, before attempting another break for it. It wasn't fair how much energy toddlers had... or maybe he was just getting old. Breakfast was another trying experience. The syrup from their pancakes ended up across the sheets, with strawberries smeared into the sheets for extra flavour. His cup of tea fell victim too, its appeal lost once half chewed, toddler drooled on, pancake ended up floating in it. If Eren had been there, he would have had everything under control, and the room service man wouldn't have had to deal with a toddler with his willy in his hand yelling about making it bigger, when the poor guy was just trying to do his job. Levi gave a him a decent tip, the man taking it all in good humour as Levi tried to assure him that this wasn't an every occurrence and that Viren was his son, and that he wasn't up to anything shady. When he thought about it after the fact, his awkwardness was probably what he was laughing about. Once again he found himself thinking Eren would have handled everything so much better.

With too much energy for his own good, Levi googled parks on his phone. It was barely 8am, so he wouldn't be able to visit his omega for another two hours. Two more hours he would have preferred to be have used to sleep, but Viren was just too wired, and their bed was a mess. Fighting to get his son dressed, then himself, he went to scold his son for jumping on their bed, when the boy jumped on him with a joyous cry  
"Daddy! Cuddle Attack!"  
"Whoa!"  
Spinning round with Viren in his arms, his bad mood lifted. He wouldn't be out of his flunk until Eren was back home, but this was nice. His son didn't mean to tax his nerves or neurons, and his pure happiness was like a salve to the throbbing wound that was his worry for Eren  
"What do you say, you and I go to the park, then we'll find something nice to bring mummy"  
"Mummy!"  
"Do you miss mummy?"  
Viren nodded, his wide grey eyes questioning Levi silently  
"Mummy had to have a special procedure, to make sure he and your little siblings are alright. But he loves you, very much and he's going to be ok"  
"Can mummy come to the park?"  
"Not today, baby. But he's going to want hear all about all the fun things you've been doing"  
"Daddy, why does mum always have to be sick?"  
"Mummy doesn't want to be sick, but this special procedure is to make him better..."  
"I don't like it"  
"I know. How about we get a special gift you can give mummy? And when he's all better, you can tell him how much you love him"  
"I do"  
Kissing Viren forehead, he nodded   
"That's my boy... let's head out to the park"

 

His mind really wasn't on playing, but without other children there, his son had latched onto him. He stubbornly demanded Levi watched as he climbed up the half dozen ladder rungs, so he could slide down a slide as long as Levi's leg. Whoever had designed the park, had definitely not thought about kids at all. The playground was only a slide and a couple of swings, half hidden in the ridiculously perfect grounds. It suited Mitras though, it's rich and money burning image, along with its closed society where kids were probably just thought as pretty decorations. Viren didn't really enough space to explore or enough to work off any extra energy... so he wasn't surprised when Viren came running to him and begged to go on the swings. This was only their second day in the city... he had no idea how he was going to keep Viren entertained for the rest of them.

 

*  
Eren kept him waiting, his husband had been showing signs of waking all day, but it was 9 hours after he first started to stir that Eren's eyes finally opened. As feared there'd been a few complications. The pups vitals had dipped so low they thought they may have to deliver them ahead of time, before gradually improving, but not before Levi just about collapsed on the spot. Then an infection had started to form along the edge of surgery site. A hair follicle irritated by a stitch, but it was enough to scare the shit out of him again. Kept under for a third day, Eren's system was flooded with antibiotics, and the fourth day after his operation, he was finally weaned off the barbiturates. Hitting the call button, Levi rose and grabbed Eren's hand, as Eren's heart rate began to rise with panic   
"Shhh. It's the breathing tube, don't fight it... you're ok"  
Blinking at him, Eren's whole face softened. Though his gaze was unfocused, his husband knew he was there, his struggling lessening  
"You kept me waiting beautiful.... shhh, don't fight the tube. You're ok... you're ok, bright eyes"  
Eren weakly squeezed his hand. It'd been a long four days. Especially when he'd been told Eren would be under for another day.

Moved away so the tube could be removed, Eren's first move was to reach for Viren. The boy crying as he watched the tube come out, and Eren began to cough. Sitting Viren on the edge of Eren's bed, his husband smiled sleepily   
"H-hey..."  
"Rest your voice. Both know how those tubes feel"  
"Horrible"  
Levi snorted softly, moving to drag the visitors chair closer to Eren's bed before sitting. Trust Eren to try jumping right into talking again. Reaching up, he brushed Eren's hair back from his face, rubbing his forehead with his thumb as he felt himself tear up  
"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen"  
Eren coughed as he shook his head, wincing slightly as he dropped his head back against the pillow. Levi's heart jumped into his throat   
"Eren?"  
"Throat"  
"Then rest. Let me try read your lips"  
Eren didn't seem convinced, but his husband was fast falling back to sleep  
"Pups"  
"Both... both are fine... I'm fine. Viren's fine and you're going to be just fine too"  
Eren didn't need to know anything other than that  
"Good... mmm, baby..."  
Kissing Eren's cheek, Viren blew a raspberry. Lifting the toddler back into his lap, he wasn't happy to be parted with his mum  
"Mummy's still recovering, here. Hold mummy's hand. He's really missed you"  
"Missed him too"  
Levi was pretty certain that wasn't the case given Eren hadn't been conscious to miss him, but the way Viren carefully held Eren's hand with both his smaller ones were adorable. Just as carefully, he laid his left cheek down on the back of it   
"We did a little shopping for you... He wanted to buy you half the soft toys in the store"  
And a million other things he grabbed off the shelves, loudly proclaiming "for mummy" each time Levi took it from his hands to return it the shelf  
"He's a good kid"  
"Yeah. A complete and total handful, but he's so much like you"  
"N'mm like you"  
Eren's eyes started to slide closed. The eyes that had haunted his dreams and teased him over how long it'd been since he'd seen them   
"Get some more sleep, bright eyes"  
"It's been a while since y' call'd me that"  
"I've missed seeing your eyes... I've missed all of you"  
"Mmm... sorry... still sleepy"  
"I can see that. We're not going anywhere"  
"Love you guys"  
"We love you too"

 

Sleeping for the next few hours, the second time Eren woke, Levi took Viren out the room while the checked Eren over. His husband didn't remember their earlier conversation, but it wasn't like he'd expected him to. Given it'd gotten so late, they probably wouldn't be able to stay for that much longer. Viren was bored and sleepy. Upset mummy couldn't get up and play. Making it a mission to find his son a cookie, he managed to keep the toddler entertained for a solid half an hour, before Viren got his cookie and they returned to Eren's room. Sitting up, Eren smiled at them tiredly  
"Look who's awake"  
"Look who's filling our son with sugar"  
"Mummy!"  
Viren made a run for Eren, Levi catching him as he tripped over his own feet and nearly lost his hard earned cookie. Carrying him over to Eren, he sat down with their son in his lap   
"Hey, baby. That's a pretty big cookie you've got there"  
"I needed bribery. How do you feel?"  
"I'm ok... sleepy... but I'm ok"  
"Good. Did they say anything?"  
"Mmm... yeah... pups are ok... that's the main thing"  
"What else did they say?"  
"A whole heap of words..."  
Levi forced a laugh. What he really wanted to know was if they talked about how the surgery went, but he didn't want to upset his omega by asking   
"Said we'd talk about it tomorrow with... with Reed"  
Yawning, Eren reached out to Viren to rest his hand on his head   
"My baby been good for daddy?"  
"It's been interesting"  
"He's been bored"  
"You could say that. I never realised how much time he spent sticking his hand down his pants"  
Eren laughed, before groaning with pain. His hand going from Viren's head to his stomach   
"Eren?"  
"Laughing isn't so great... I feel like I'm going to burst"  
"No laughing. Ok..."  
"Mmm... skins itchy too"  
"You had the start of an infection, but they've got it under control"  
"I think they said something about that too... and bleeding... I really can't remember"  
"Don't try and force it..."  
"'m not... how about you? You look sleepy"  
That was so very Eren  
"I'm ok. You have me a bit of scare though. I'm sure my hair's more grey than black these days"  
"Sorry... I like your hair black"  
"It's fine"  
"Tell me what you've been up to. Have you been having fun with daddy?"  
Viren hid behind his cookie, Eren giving another laugh and a groan  
"I should know better than to ask"  
"We went to the park, and we've been shopping. They have a kids channel at the hotel..."  
"TV babysitting for the win..."  
"Yeah. I've been lost without you around"  
"I'm sure that's not true"  
"I let him out in public without shoes on yesterday. Completely forgot them"  
"I've done that before too. You're not alone"  
"That's nice to know... I've missed... I've missed you so much"  
Tearing up, Eren gave him a loving smile   
"Hey. I'm ok"  
"I was scared you wouldn't wake"  
"Like I'd leave my two best men alone... hey, come here"  
Moving Viren up to Eren's bed, Levi wrapped his arms around both his loves. Nuzzling and kissing Eren's temple, he didn't care that Eren's hair smelt or that his mate hadn't showered in days. All he cared about was holding him again. The floodgates breaking open completely   
"You died... you left me and you died... and I wasn't there"  
"Shhhh... it's ok, alpha. It's ok"  
"I was so fucking useless. I kept wondering if it was ok to be taking Viren to play or to go shopping. I kept thinking about you"  
"I know you would have. I know. But it's over now, right?"  
"Y-yeah..."  
Eren picked up on the stuttered in his word  
"They couldn't remove all the tumour, but they got most of it... and then you nearly... you were gone"  
"Shhh, Levi. Levi, it's ok. I'm ok... my poor alpha. You've been so worried, while I slept. Have you called anyone? Let them know how things are?"  
"N-no..."  
"Leeeee. You were supposed to"  
"I texted Mike when you came out of surgery. But... I didn't want to hear it"  
"You said you'd call them. I didn't want you being alone"  
"I couldn't. Not until you were awake. I love you... I love you so much"  
"I love you, Lee. And I love my baby boy... can you lift Viren? He's on my stomach"  
"Oh! Shit... hold on..."  
Viren clutched to his cookie and at Eren's hospital gown as Levi pulled him back into his hold as he sat back in the visitors chair   
"Better?"  
"Not really... I'd rather the cuddles"  
"When we get home, you're going to have so many cuddles that you won't know what to do"  
"I wouldn't mind them now. My omega's so confused over everything. It wants its alpha, and wants to kill whoever touched our pups"  
"I don't think Reed will appreciate that"  
"Nor do I. How's your alpha?"  
Anxious. Worried. Angry. Confused. Freaking the fuck out...  
"Better now you're awake"  
"Coming off suppressants doesn't help either"  
"You're supposed to be worrying about yourself, not me"  
"Of course I'm going to worry about my family. You guys are my everything"  
"And you're ours..."

Knocking on the glass door, a young nurse poked her head in the room  
"I'm sorry, but visiting hours are coming to the end"  
Withdrawing before he could reply, Levi looked back to Eren. His omega having paled in the last few moments  
"Eren?"  
"'m ok"  
"Hey, if you don't want us to go, I can ask about staying"  
"No. No, you need to take Viren home. He needs a bath and it's way past his bedtime"  
Murmuring the words, Eren's tearing eyes betrayed him  
"Eren..."  
"It's ok. I know you guys can't stay... I'm just... feeling really clingy..."  
"Like I said, I can ask"  
Eren wiped his eyes, not stemming the running tears  
"No... you look tired too... and I'm not... not going anywhere"  
"I can't leave you like this"  
"I know I shouldn't be scared, but I don't know this place... it doesn't smell like home"  
"Shhh... it's ok. You're safe. Here, Viren hop up for a second"  
Lifting Viren off his lap, Levi pulled his jacket off. Not caring it wasn't hygienic as he moved to lay it under Eren's head and across his pillows  
"Better?"  
"I love your scent..."  
"Good. I'll..."  
"You should take Viren back to the hotel... He spends too much time in hospital"  
"I don't want to leave you"  
"I don't want you two sleeping here..."  
"What can I do? I hate seeing you crying"  
"Give me a kiss?"  
Levi was happy to oblige, the nasal cannula getting in the way as he did. Straightening it out, he smiled at his mate sadly. He hated how scared Eren was becoming  
"I'll be here first thing in the morning, and we'll stay the whole day. I'll bring my phone in, so you can use it if you want, or look at photos. I've taken heaps of photos because I know you love them"  
"I... I don't deserve you"  
"Oh, bright eyes. You deserve the world. And who knows, maybe I'll bring you your own huge cookie"  
"Reed said I can't eat solid right now"  
Levi frowned  
"When did she say that?"  
"Before the surgery... because of you know... giving birth out my arse"  
Oh... yeah... straining to take a shit might not be the best thing right now  
"Right. Then I'll just have to make you cookies when we get home"  
"I'll hold you to that... where's Viren? I want to give him a kiss"

It fucking sucked to leave Eren behind. His omega looked heartbroken as he guided Viren out Eren's room. He should have insisted that Eren slept. If he'd been asleep when Levi and Viren left, then his mate wouldn't be so sad...

 

*  
Eren was flown back on the 23rd of February rather than the 21st. Coughing too hard due to his irritated throat had caused a tear in his stitching, and another unexpected surgery. Even if it was a very minor bleed, he was proud that Eren caught the fact that something was wrong, and spoken up about it rather than trying to hide the bleeding. Coming back home to Shinganshima was relieving. Eren was heavily depressed over the remaining tumour mass, despite trying hard not to show it. His husband's vitals had been all over the place, and Reed wouldn't sign off on the transfer until they'd steadied and remained within suitable values for 24 hours.

Viren had once again hated flying, crying from the moment the cabin pressurised, right up to the moment he was taken into Hanji's arms at the hospital. Being on home turf made it easier to keep his worry under control. Eren was back in an environment he knew, and they'd be able to have some together as they had babysitters available. Meeting him at the front of the hospital, Hanji was all smiles as cuddled with Viren  
"It's about time you got back"  
"Nice to see you, too. How's Eren?"  
"Popped in to see him before, but he was sleeping. The transfer went like clockwork, buuuut, you're both in the sh-shoe with me"  
"Oh? Why now?"  
Falling into step with Hanji was easy. It felt like he could breathe easier and the air all that much cleaner than it had been in Mitras  
"Getting married without telling anyone! I can't believe you stole my Honey away, and eloped"  
"Who told you? Was it Eld or Gunther?"  
"What?! They knew?! How come they got to know?! I wanted to throw Eren a huge wedding... did you do it right!? Was he happy!?"  
"We got married at the courthouse before Eren's surgery... and if it wasn't them, then who?"  
"It was on his transfer papers. Under personal affects was listed none as they were in the possession of his husband"  
"I knew I hated paperwork"  
"Why didn't you tell meeeeee?! Do you know how long I've been mentally planning this wedding?! How many hours I've put into the seat charts and flowers?!"  
"Don't worry, we still want a big wedding... Eren was scared of dying without marrying me"  
If he said he was just as scared, Hanji would pull the piss out of him for the rest of his life   
"And here I was, ready to give you shit. I can't tease you for a reason like that"  
"Once the trial is over and the pups are born, then we'll talk wedding. That's the agreement"  
"I read his updated medical records..."  
"And?"  
Pressing the elevator button, Hanji made him wait until they'd stepped inside and she'd pushed the button to the floor Eren was on before continuing   
"And I read about what happened... how is?"  
"Not happy. He's trying to hide it, but he feels guilty for not being strong enough for the whole of the tumour to be removed. Which is complete shoe. His omega's also been all over the place. He's wanted cuddles, but we got in trouble for Viren sitting on his bed, and I got us in trouble for leaving my jacket over his pillow so he'd have my scent"  
"Well, he's home now. Mike said he'd take Viren tonight. He also said that Titan needs to go on a diet"  
"He's fine the way he is... and I might take him up on that. We haven't had a chance to talk about everything. Not with little ears in the room"  
"How did he enjoy his holiday?"  
Watching the doors open, this time Levi made Hanji wait as he stepped off. Viren was practically asleep in her hold  
"He didn't. He wanted Eren and didn't understand why he couldn't be there. Plus, being in a hotel room most of the time left him with energy to spare. The second day Eren was awake, he talked at him for two hours straight"  
"I'm sooooo glad Anna's growing out of that. She's made Eren a card, but I'm not allowed to give it to him. And she's been lost without Viren"  
"For being your daughter, she's not as much as a pain in the arse as you are"  
"I know. She reminds me so much of Moblit... I'd like to take credit, but Eren has been so good with her"  
"Eren's really good with kids, and omegas. It's a shame he never got to put those skills to use outside of babysitting and saving omegas being attacked"  
"He's still young. Give it a couple of years for the pups to grow"  
"I know he's still young. I'm just saying..."  
"You're saying your smitten by everything he does"  
"He is my husband"  
"I know that. Do I get to see the wedding ring?"  
"Once it's back on his finger with the other two"  
"You've bought him half a jewellery shop... the rings, the charm bracelet, the wolves..."  
"Eren bought the wolves..."  
He couldn't deny Hanji's point though. He'd bought Eren four rings over the span of their relationship, which would possibly be around $7000 worth of jewellery... or so. But when compared to the fact that some spent that on a single ring, it really didn't seem that bad. Besides, Eren was beautiful. He'd had such a hard life and deserved pretty things. And the charm bracelet was Eren's pride and joy. A "V" added for their son, and when the next two pups came, he'd buy charm letters for both of them  
"Ooooooh. That makes me more sense"  
"Yeah. He didn't want me to give his jewellery back until we were back home. Viren's been after the wolves"

 

Eren was awake when they walked in, giving them a small wave, Hanji raised an eyebrow   
"Is that all I get?"  
"Sorry. Hey, Hanji. How've you been?"  
"I've been worried about my little Sweetheart. My married, Sweetheart"  
Eren looked from Hanji to him  
"I didn't tell her. It was on your paperwork"  
"Oh... yeah... um... we got married"  
"I know. I mean. I heard. Levi said I couldn't look at the wedding ring until it was back on your finger"  
"That might be a while... I think they're swollen"  
Swollen? Since when? Eren's fingers were on the slender side. Like those of a piano player   
"Noooo... I want to seeeee! I can't believe you guys didn't invite me"  
"It was a small ceremony"  
"With a nice wedding night. Can I have Viren?"  
Walking over to Eren, Hanji set Viren down beside him. Leaving Levi to walk around the bed and sink down to sit on the other side  
"How do you feel? Any pain? Or discomfort?"  
"Hanji, you know what it's like to be pregnant. Everything hurts... and my tits are leaky"  
Hanji giggled  
"This is true. I want to take a little look at your stitches while I'm here"  
Levi sighed, taking Eren's hand into his. His omega's fingers didn't look swollen  
"Leave him alone"  
"I can't help it. He was gone for soooo long"  
Kissing the top of Viren's head, their son mumbled out "mumma" as he nuzzled into Eren's chest  
"How long am I going to be in here?"  
"A week or so. It depends if any complications arise"  
"Yay. I've gone from being stuck in one hospital to being stuck in another..."  
"At least you have all of us for entertainment..."  
Eren didn't look enthused or amused  
"Fiiiine. At least you're closer to being back home. Oh. That reminds me. I had Mike go ahead and pick a shower chair up for you, and a couple of rails in the bathroom to make getting around easier"  
"You didn't need to do that"  
"Nonsense. You're not to be on your feet for extended periods of time"  
"I know this"  
"Then you know it's for your own good, Eren"  
"It doesn't mean you get to rearrange Levi's apartment while he's not home"  
It wasn't just his apartment. He'd noticed the changes in Eren's speech that directly related to his omega's mental state. If he was upset, Eren tried to back away from things. It became Levi's room, Levi's apartment and Levi's son. Thankfully, Hanji hadn't or she'd be making Eren even more uncomfortable   
"He doesn't mind. Your health is our number one priority. Over the next few days, you'll be resting. We'll be performing ultrasounds daily, as well as monitoring you closely. I know you're sick to death of having no privacy and of being poked at... but this is for your own wellbeing and that of the pups. We need to know the second something doesn't feel right or normal"  
Eren let out a faint whine, Levi squeezing his hand hard  
"Stop scaring him"  
"I'm just explaining so he knows what's going on"  
"You can do that without scaring him"  
"Guys... that's enough. I think I want to get some more sleep"  
"Mike is going to look after Viren tonight, because we both know Levi isn't going to want to leave you"  
"He should go home"  
"I'm not going anywhere"  
"Titan and Viren need you"  
"And they're both going to be taken care of... we haven't had a chance to talk since the surgery"  
"I don't really feel like talking. I'm still tired from the flight"  
Hanji caught his eye, her frown obvious   
"I'm fine. I just need to sleep off the meds and stuff. Levi, you should take Viren home"  
"I'm staying with you"  
"Levi"  
"Eren. I'm staying and that's final. You're husband and I've been worried sick about you. We're home and Mike is happy to look after Viren"  
"No fighting you two. Eren, I want to take a look at those stitches now, then I'll let you sleep"  
"Not with Viren in the room..."  
"Alright. Let me get Mike and we'll figure this out"

 

Eren's stitches didn't look great. That wasn't to say that whoever closed the wound hadn't done a nice job. It was more that he hated that Eren needed them to begin with. The bruising had mostly faded, and the edges had started to scar closed. Replacing the wound dressing, Hanji hummed as she worked  
"It looks good. The infection has cleared up nicely... you've got a little bit of flaking which is probably itchy as hell, so I'll get some cream for that..."  
"So, he's ok?"  
"Yep. You'll have a scar, but things look really good to me"  
"No signs of another bleed?"  
"Nope. The bruising and swelling will pass, and we'll find out the rest when we give you an ultrasound"  
Eren had his eyes closed during Hanji's examination. Breathing through his nose, his husband looked as if he was trying his hardest to fake being asleep  
"Thanks, Hanji. Is... am I allowed to lay next to him?"  
"You'll need to be careful not to jostle him, and you'll need to avoid placing any pressure at all on his stomach. For now, I would prefer if you remained sitting by his side until after the ultrasound"  
"Alright. I'm not going anywhere anyway"  
"We all know that. I'll try to be here for the ultrasound, then we can find you a blanket or two"  
Nodding, Hanji flashed him a large smile as she started cleaning up the mess she'd made  
"It really is good to have you back. Anna is going to be so excited to see you again. She's been asking about you everyday and how "Uncle Eren's babies" are. I'm off for a couple of hours tomorrow around lunch, so I'll bring lunch in with me. You're probably sick to death of hospital food"  
"They've had him on soft foods"  
"That makes sense. I know a great place that does an amazing array of desserts. I'm sure I can find a few things"  
Eren let out a nasally sigh  
"Ok... can I go to sleep now?"  
"Sure thing. Levi, you're in charge of watching over him"  
"Like I'd do anything else"  
"I don't need a babysitter"  
"You do too. Besides, I don't want to be the one to make Levi leave. You might not know it, but he's scary"  
"Mmm... I've been told... I think I need to sleep for like a year"  
"You can't sleep for a year, there's the trial and then there these two than need to come out. And this little one of mine. Nope. Sorry. No can do"  
"Can I sleep for a month?"  
"There's still the trial, Honey"  
Levi wanted to smack Hanji for being stupid enough to bring the trial up, but then... Eren laughed softly  
"Damn. Foiled again..."  
"I know. But you're home now. We're going to get you through this, and that's final"  
"Yes, mum. Now let me sleep"  
"You'd be asleep if you didn't keep talking"  
"Then stop talking to me"  
"You're the one talking to me"  
"Fine. Good night"  
"Goodnight, sleep tight. Don't let the big bad alpha bite"  
"Mmm... ok"

 

When Hanji left, Levi sighed   
"Do you want to tell me what you're thinking?"  
"I'm sleepy"  
"Eren, I'd like to think I know a little something about my own husband by now. I know you're pulling away, and I want to know why"  
When Eren didn't answer right away, Levi squeezed his hand  
"It's the pup. I know it's the pup. Bright eyes, it's not your fault they had to end the procedure"  
Eren replied flatly   
"How do you know that?"  
"Because Reed said as much. The pup was going into distress, so she made the call. And yes, you're going to have a caesarean, but you were going to have one anyway"  
"I... it feels like all this... was for nothing... it was supposed to fix it... and it didn't... fix anything"  
Releasing Eren's hand, Levi moved to pull his husband against him  
"That's not true... that's not true at all"  
"Tell me how that isn't true. He's going to need more surgery... and he's still got that tumour attached to him..."  
"Oh, so it's a he now. I thought we weren't finding out"  
Eren sniffled, his scent was all over the place, as if his omega really couldn't understand how to feel  
"I don't know... but... they need more surgery. I'm sick of our pup needing more surgery. It's not fair. They didn't do anything wrong. The only thing they've done wrong is have me for a mother"  
"That's not true. You're an incredible mother"  
"An... an incredible mother who died on the operating table... I ruin everything"  
"You had a bleed, which was not your fault. You'd just had a mammoth procedure done. You haven't ruined a single thing. Yes. The pup will need more surgery once they're born, but, with a decrease in tumour mass, less of everything they need to grow will be going into it. It's going to ease the pressure on his systems, and make things easier until he's born. Eren, you're an amazing mum. This world is filled with people who don't care about their children. Most people would have aborted, but you wanted them to have a chance to live. To experience everything and to be happy"  
"But what if something else is wrong? What if he's wrong? What if when he's born, he's... he can't look after himself"  
"No baby can look after its self"  
"You know what I mean!"  
"Then, we'll figure it out"  
"Not everything can be figured out. What kind of quality of life is there if he's nothing more than... than a vegetable..."  
"Hey... we don't know that... and, if something were to happen, we both know how hard you fought for him to have a normal and good life. I mean it Eren. You're the reason our family functions. When I'm with Viren, I'm still scrambling to figure out how to make him happy and how to keep him entertained. I don't know how to calm him down, or anything like that... I thought I was doing a good job at being a father, but these past few months taught me, and showed me, how much of a failure I had been"  
"You're not a failure... you had to work"  
"While I kept leaving the pair of you home alone"  
"He's too young to remember. But you had to work. I got it..."  
"You shouldn't have to get it. I realised something when I took Viren to the park. All those times we were sick, you nursed us like it was nothing... but unless you couldn't hide it, you hid being sick from us, didn't you?"  
"It's what a parent does... Viren didn't understand... you were busy... so I had to..."  
"I'm sorry, Eren. If I could back in time, I would..."  
"You had to work... and it wasn't always bad... Hanji let me stay there sometimes... or Mike would come check on me if she was busy"  
"And I had no idea"  
"I asked them not to tell. You had a really hard job. You didn't need to be worrying over something like me"  
"You're not a thing. You're my husband. My husband who I wished would be more selfish and tell me the things he wants and needs"  
"I want this all to be over... I'm so scared that I'm going to sneeze and go into labour... Mitras was so fucking scary at night... but I didn't want to be even more of a burden on you. I'm sick of it"  
"You're not a burden. You're stubborn and frustrating, but you're not a burden... and soon these two little ones will be part of our family, and the pain of all of this will fade to a memory"  
"I want a girl... but... I don't know. I don't want Anna to be jealous"  
"I think Anna would be thrilled if you had a girl. Viren was the one who didn't want a sister"  
"That's because he only had girls to play with... I want a brother for him... so he can feel what it is to have a brother who loves you..."  
"So you want a girl and a boy, that sounds pretty perfect to me"  
"Sometimes I wonder what the other pup would have been..."  
"I do to. But I don't care if they're male or female, I only care that their mother is safe and heathy"  
"You're supposed to care about them"  
"I do. But I can't run this family the way you can. And if you're safe and healthy, so are they"  
Eren nodded, sniffling louder as he tried to calm down  
"It's just so frustrating"  
"I know it is. I know, but I'm here with you"  
"I'm sorry for making you worry... I haven't been able to calm down since the surgery... everything in my head... I can't work it out"  
"Unlike Mitras, no one is stupid enough to tell us off or separated. After the ultrasound, I'm going to curl up in this bed with you, and cuddle the fuck out of you"  
"I... I want that so fucking much... I've been really lonely"  
"Not anymore. Anyone who tries to seperate, I'll hand Viren off to when he's mid tantrum"  
"That's cruel"  
"He throws some impressive tantrums"  
"Anna's were just as bad when she was his age. One time she found a pair of scissors and gave herself a hair cut, then screamed herself hoarse when Hanji took the scissors off her. Another time, Hanji gave her the wrong fork, so Anna threw her food at her. It ended with Anna on the floor screaming as she smacked her spilt dinner"  
"Oh... wow..."  
"Mhmmm"  
"And we have two more tantrum machines coming"  
"Aren't you glad you quit work for this?"  
"I'm starting to wonder..."  
Eren let out a tiny laugh  
"If you want to go back, I won't blame you. You're the kind of person who has to always be busy"  
"I'm pretty sure I'm going to be plenty busy"  
"What I mean is, you need the job or a job too..."  
"Who knows. I could be the house husband and you could get the job"  
"I tried... I tried really hard before I found out I was pregnant. No one wants to hire omega's. One guy yelled at me for wasting his time. One guy told me I could have a job if I let him fuck me in front of everyone in the cafe it was at... the only job I could maybe get again would be as a dancer and you don't want me to show my body off..."  
"You didn't tell me this"  
"Why would I?"  
"Because..."  
"Because what? It's so common it's not worth mentioning. There was one I kind of wanted. It was just an office job, but it was the kind of place I never thought I'd be able to even get an interview at. The problem was, they wanted someone with a higher education... but you get that"  
"I..."  
"I don't want to talk about it anymore. I think I want to nap"

This time, Levi let Eren get away with it. Despite his protesting muscles and aching back, Levi remained hunched over and awkwardly hugging Eren until his husband actually fell asleep. The fact that no one wanted to hire someone like Eren, left him sick to his stomach. Anyone would be lucky to be working with Eren. He cared deeply about those around him, and was always working hard to improve himself and the things he took an interest in... yet society had spat on his again for being an omega. He may have been joking about being a house husband, on partly, but now it might really be better if Eren was the one to get a job once everything had settled down again. It'd be an enormous confidence boost for his mate. Something Eren definitely needed... but until that happened, maybe Eren would be interested in going back to school and learning something new? Levi had been thinking he should probably look at retraining too, so maybe they could find something to do together?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annnnd back to the trial we go


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW : talk about Eren's past... foster home, Zeke's death etc

Having Floch come to see them on the 5th, Eren was nervous about the 6th. He was supposed to take the stand again, and it seemed like the man was pinning all his hopes on him. The only problem was that being on bedrest with an adventurous toddler wasn't quite happening. Viren didn't understand why he wasn't allowed to jump on the bed or why Eren wasn't allowed to come and play with him and Anna. Anna didn't understand it either, but she was much more reasonable than Viren. Hanji had told her she had to be gentle with him, so he'd been stuck "gently" playing dolls with the girl, while Viren wasn't impressed. Everything Eren did, was closely monitored by Levi. Bathroom trips, sponge baths, changing clothes and even rolling over in bed, Levi was there. Taking the stand would be the first time that Eren would be allowed some space to breathe, and unlike before, Floch wanted him to give his statement in three parts, rather than a series of statements. Like it made any real difference, no matter how "nicely" Floch tried to word it. Nick's lawyers still weren't done with him, and had scheduled to call back to the stand towards the end of the month. It was naive, but he'd prayed the trial would all be over by now... yet, apparently they were still questioning witnesses... a majority, Floch had a feeling, had been paid off.

 

*  
Unable to get comfortable or sleep, Eren had crept out of their bedroom while Levi was sleeping. He couldn't take the constant pressure on his hips and lower back... and he was sick of feeling useless. His stitches were mostly kind of healed, or enough that he felt like he could sneeze without risking everything busting out. Which surely had to mean the stitches inside of him were the same. He was only on rest really to prevent any amniotic fluid leaks given they'd had to go through the sack to reach the pup. Stealing a proper shower, unaided and alone, he felt more human coming out of it than he had since before the surgery. He hated the feel of dirt against his skin, or the feeling of his being thick and oily. Even after drying and blow drying his hair, he still had time to do his make up and make a start on breakfast with Viren, before Levi came rushing out  
"You're not supposed to be on your feet!"  
Marching into the kitchen, Levi took the fry pan off the stove top, scaring Viren as he slammed it down on the counter  
"Levi..."  
"You're supposed to be resting. Do you want to go into labour?!"  
"Levi..."  
"I can't have... not today..."  
Despite his heart racing from Levi being so angry, he knew his alpha was only angry because he was scared  
"Ok... ok, I'm sorry. I wasn't comfortable in bed, so I got up. I've been taking it easy. I know you're worried, but I feel alright"  
He still felt like shit over the pup, and it stung to know Levi thought he'd intentionally place their child in danger after all he went through to keep them alive. Biting his lip, he felt Viren taking his hand  
"Mummy?"  
"It's ok, baby. Daddy isn't really mad. Let's go sit on the sofa and watch 'toons"  
Rubbing his face, Levi sighed. Reaching out, Eren flinched away. Levi's scent was still too angry for him to handle. Without being able to distract himself from the trial with trivial things, it was flooding back into his mind   
"I'm sorry. It's just... everything is place to keep you safe. The last thing we need is the pup making an early appearance"  
"Don't you think I know that? My stitches are mostly healed and you're going to stick me in that stupid wheelchair today. I hurt from sitting all the time. I want to be on my feet, even if it's to just walk a little... making breakfast isn't going to send me into labour, but fighting with you over everything just might"

Leading Viren out the kitchen, and to the sofa, Titan rose long enough for them to settle, before climbing into Viren's lap so he could place his paws on Eren's stomach. Titan had been super affectionate with all of them since their return. Patting Titan, Viren looked up to him  
"That's right, be careful with Titan"  
"He's heavy and furry!"  
"He is. He's also mummy's best friend"  
"You can have a cat for a friend?"  
"Yep. He's very special to me, just like you're very special to me"  
"Eren, he better not be on your stomach!"  
Stupid Levi...  
"He's not. He's in Viren's lap. If you're going to make breakfast, hurry up and make it!"   
"Mum, did dad do something wrong?"  
"No, baby. Mummy and daddy aren't fighting. Daddy is just super worried about mummy's tummy"  
"Mummy's tummy is big!"  
Wasn't that the truth. 30 weeks and he looked every single bit of it. Nothing fitted anymore, even the shirt of Mike's he was wearing was stretched to breaking point. He really needed new clothes, but the trial came first... or maybe he could just get his own back at Levi and stop wearing shirts at home. From the way he'd wake with Levi poking him in the arse, his alpha was struggling like hell with his desires. Sucked to be him... Eren was struggling with his own horniness, but he could "enjoy" his body, while Levi had to watch and wait. After all, they didn't tell him he couldn't jerk off, and with all that pressure on his arse, these things were bound to happen  
"Mummy, will my tummy get all big like that?"  
"No baby. You're so much like your father, I'm expecting you to be a little alpha like him"  
"I'm not little!"  
Eren sighed. Levi's input wasn't helping   
"Not everyone can get pregnant baby... some guys can and some girls can. But your tummy isn't going to get all big like this"  
"It looks funny"  
"It does, doesn't it. Here, give me your hand"  
Moving Titan's paws out the way, Eren placed Viren hand on his swell, where one of the pups were kicking. Letting out a shrieking laugh, Viren jerked his hand back  
"That feels funny!"  
"That's your little brother, or sister... in a couple of months, you're going to be a big brother"  
"What if I don't want to be a brother?"  
"It doesn't quite work like that. But I promise, mummy and daddy are going to love you just as much. No matter what baby"  
"It's not a girl is it? I don't want a girl"  
"Mummy and daddy don't know yet..."  
"But it's in you"  
"Really? I hadn't noticed. Why don't you keep patting Titan? He really likes being patted softly"  
"Do you like being patted softly?"  
Eren snorted  
"Yeah, baby. Daddy gives the best belly rubs"  
"He likes your tummy!"  
"He does. And when you're an adult, you'll understand all about it... but not before you're 30"  
"That's soooooo old"  
"How old do you think mummy is?"  
Viren hummed  
"12!"  
"And daddy?"  
"15!"  
Oh god... his son was way too fucking cute, though a little alarming over how young he was making them  
"And how old are you?"  
"Ummmm... this many"  
Holding up four fingers, his son gave him a toothy grin  
"Not quite. You're this many, baby"  
Pushing down Viren's little finger, Eren nodded   
"Yep. My little big man is 3"  
"Three!"  
"And how old is kitty?!"  
"I don't know, you'll have to ask daddy!"  
Viren climbed off the sofa, to run into the kitchen to ask Levi all about how old Titan in. In his haste, Titan was dislodged from his lap, the tom jumping onto Eren's belly in annoyance. Scratching his chin lovingly, he whispered to Titan   
"If you don't tell, I won't. I love you, handsome man"

 

*  
Forced into the loathsome wheelchair, Eren hated it. Arriving after the start of the trial was organised by Floch, with two of his team members acting as Eren's guards. With the piece of shit known as Nick, already inside the courtroom, he wasn't in danger of being pushing down again, though he was in danger of yelling if people didn't stop fussing. Mike was there to monitor him, with the medic, before taking the stand, while Hanji had taken Viren to the natural history museum with Anna. He hated disrupting everyone's life over his past. He'd tried so hard to keep them all out of it, yet there they all were, dragged into another one of his messes.

Allowed some decency, he was permitted to walk into the courtroom. Mike would be waiting behind the scene on the off-chance something went wrong while he gave evidence. The man a little concerned at about his high blood pressure, but as there hadn't been any fluid loss, Eren wasn't as concerned. Stepping into the room, everything was too quiet for his liking. Nick looked disgustingly pleased to see him... a sentiment Eren couldn't echo. Taking his oath, he could tell more than a few people were surprised to hear him speak, though the translator was on hand incase his voice decided to desert him again. Sitting in the hard wooden chair, his back complained at the lack of comfort. Whatever Floch had planned, it better be worth all of this.

Smiling at him, Floch's lawyer tried to be friendly... tried being the key word. The man talking to him softly as if he was going to break if he raised his voice too loud  
"Hello Eren, it's nice to see you've recovered. I want to ask you some simple questions today, is that alright?"  
"Y-yes"  
"Excellent. Now Eren, Nick's team hasn't really explored your life, so today, I want you to tell us a little more"  
Nick's lawyers automatically objected, because "it has nothing to do with the current case". Arguing that it spoke to Eren's state of mind and relationship to his father, it was surprisingly allowed. Maybe it was just surprising to him  
"So Eren, let's start with the basics shall we? How old were you, when you presented as an omega?"  
"I was 8"  
Floch hadn't told him much about what to expect from his legal team, only to go with it   
"You were 8 years old when you presented. That's awfully young... and just for the sake of memory, how old are you now?"  
"I'm 24. 25 at the end of the month"  
"So you've been an omega for 16 years. How long did it take for you to become accustomed to your secondary dynamic?"  
"I... don't think I ever really have..."  
"So you've never felt comfortable in your own skin?"  
"No... it was worse before I met my alpha. But society isn't that great with its treatment of omegas. But Levi's always seen me as more than omega... not like everyone else"  
"You mean, like with your foster home placements? Eren, could you tell us how you ended up on foster care?"  
Ooooh... so... nope. He still wasn't sure where this was going   
"After my mum died, my father changed..."  
"Sorry to interrupt, but your mother dying, can you elaborate on that for us?"  
"My dad shot my mum in front of me when I was 10... in the kitchen of our old house. I was knocked unconscious by him. After that night, he became abusive. He's regularly beat me and abuse me for being an omega. He broke my arm and abandoned me... after that, he disappeared and I was placed into foster care"  
He hadn't even been on the stand for 10 minutes and he was tearing up...  
"And you had no idea he was alive?"  
"No... they said they'd tried to find him, but instead they found Zeke"  
"For clarification, Zeke was?"  
"My older half brother. He took me in when I was 17"  
"And we'll get to that. Eren, can you tell me what happened in foster care? In particular what happened in that last house?"  
"I couldn't forget, even if I tried... I was passed from family to family as... as I'd presented so young and no one wanted the hassle of a young omega in heat, near their children. The last house I was in... was the worst. At first I thought it was something I'd done. Something I deserved... I did everything for them. Because I'd been moved around so much, no one came to check on me. I'd already stopped going to school after my mother died, and I was, am, an omega. They'd found a home that hadn't sent me back, and that was that"  
Shit... he was starting to panic. Scratching at his leg through his jeans, he wanted to tear into his own skin... he knew what Floch's lawyer wanted... and now he'd have to spill his shameful secrets to the whole courtroom... they were all going to find him dirty and wrong... he was...  
"Eren, it's alright. You're doing great. You said you did everything. Can you elaborate on that for me?"  
"I cooked and cleaned... and was... was the entertainment. They kept me gagged and bounded so I could do things, but couldn't complain. As I got older... they um... started using me for more than just entertainment. They wouldn't knot me, but everything else was ok to them... sometimes they got carried away, but they directed most of it at my stomach, so even if they did get carried away... nothing could have survived"  
"So they raped you?"  
Rape was such a harsh word... a word he really hadn't understood until Levi explained everything to him and helped him understand that things done to him hadn't been his fault, and that his body belonged to him. It was his right to decide who touched him and how  
"Y-yes... I thought it was all my fault. That I deserved it for being an omega... but one night they were talking. They knew... they knew who my father was... they were doing everything to me, because of who he was and what he'd done"  
"They knew who you were?"  
"Yes... they... they kept me in the basement... that's where they found me. They... they made me eat and drink from bowls like a dog. I slept on thin blankets that were always wet and cold... when it'd rain, the basement would flood... and there were rats"

Nick's lawyers objected again, and this time Floch's lawyer was told to make his point already. Shaking like a leaf, Eren really wanted things to come to an end soon. Levi had healed so many wounds, but now those wounds were being picked open again. It didn't matter if he objected anyway... Eren was getting it now. Floch was making him more human for the jury, by exposing how bad omegas were treated by society  
"I'm sorry Eren. You're doing so well, but we don't want to put any pressure on you or your pregnancy. I understand you had a slight fall and complications?"  
"I was pushed down the steps of the courthouse"  
"Ah. I'm sorry to hear that. I know you're anxious to get off the stand, so can I ask that you tell us what came next? What happened once you were taken from that house? Then you can take a break"  
"After... after I was found, I was in hospital. My skin had grown over the plastic restraints around my ankles. My body hadn't grown right from being constantly restrained. I was underweight, covered in sores and bites that were infected... my teeth grew funny because of the gag and I nearly died... I had to have surgery, but I couldn't speak... I'd been gagged for so long that when they took it out, I felt like I didn't deserve to have a voice. Someone had reported the family to social services and the police... about two months after I was brought in, I met my older half brother Zeke Yeager, who became my legal guardian. The police also weren't aware that my father was alive and working just outside of Karanes in an omega breeding farm known as "The Church""  
Nick looked ready to have a stroke, Floch's lawyer looked happy as fuck, and Eren... was crying silently. He was done. It was all too much. Pulling power, the judge released him from the stand. Probably because his scent was oozing out and making more than a couple of the courtroom staff uncomfortable.

 

Collapsing into Mike's arms, Mike stroked his hair like Levi would. He'd opened his mouth and the truth had come out... as proud of himself as he was, he wanted Levi even more  
"I need Levi"  
"Let me take care of you first..."  
Deposited into the wheelchair, Mike returned him to the room they'd been waiting in. A few minutes later, Levi was there. Despite knowing he was supposed to remain sitting, he needed his mate. Levi catching him as he threw himself at his alpha  
"Bright Eyes, you're ok..."  
"I want to go home... take me home..."  
"I will. I will, I've got you. You did so good"  
"Nick was mad... so mad..."  
"I know. And that's because he knows he's screwed. You did so good"  
"I wasn't up there long..."  
"It doesn't matter how long you were up there for, you told them in your own words what happened because of your father. Don't you see. Nick employed Grisha... but he also had to have had someone in the foster system. They knew about your father. This has opened up a whole other line of investigation now. All those kids being mistreated, people are going to be demanding someone checks on them. You did so good"  
"Can we go home... I... need you to do something for me...?"  
"Anything for you. Anything at all. I couldn't be prouder of you. I'm serious"  
"I feel dirty"  
"You're not dirty... not at all. You did so good"  
Stroking his face, Eren nuzzled into Levi's palm. He could almost believe it when it came from Levi  
"Eren, I want to give you quick look over and make sure you're ok, then Levi can take you home"  
Eren shook his head, he wanted to get out of the courthouse before he ran the risk of running into Nick or one of his paid friends  
"Eren, its ok. Mike won't hurt you"  
God. Levi could be clueless sometimes  
"It's not about that... I don't like risking seeing Nick"  
"Nick's being dragged off again. It's probably safer to stay in here"  
"Ok..."  
"Hey, he's not going to lay a finger on you"  
"I don't want to talk about it here"

 

*  
Viren was still with Hanji while Eren led Levi into the bathroom. Sitting on the edge of the bathtub, Levi moved to take his face into his hands  
"Do you want to talk about it now?"  
"I... this morning you upset me... I know I'm supposed to be resting, but it just brings nightmares and makes my arse hurt"  
"You knew this was going to be hard, and you agreed"  
"I know. It's just harder than I thought it'd be... and today really... really brought back things you'd made go away"  
"Is that why we're in the bathroom?"  
Eren nodded  
"What is it? What do you need?"  
"I feel dirty... you know what they did to me and I said that in front of everyone... I didn't want people to know"  
"I know you didn't"  
"I don't want to go back there... I don't want to feel like that"  
"What do you need?"  
"I... want you to touch me..."  
"Eren"  
"Not like that... I want you to make me dirty... so when they make me remember, I think of you"  
"Eren, it doesn't work like that"  
"Levi, you've done so much. You tried so hard to fix me. And now I'm like this again. The whole drive home, I couldn't stop thinking about it. They beat me. They jacked off on me and they pissed on me... I know it's kind of a thing you like... and I want to... not think of it as a bad thing because of you"  
Levi groaned, his alpha shaking his head   
"You're killing me here. I never meant to..."  
"No! No... I... it's different when it's you... it's always been different with you. You give me the choice, and the control of my own body. You taught me that it was my body... so... I want to do this with you"  
"You're supposed to be resting"  
"I'm literally sitting at the moment"  
"Eren..."  
"Please, Levi. I don't mean having sex or doing anything to extreme... I want to watch you jerk off and come on my stomach"  
Levi let out a laugh  
"That's all?"  
"What else..."  
Eren blushed as he realised where Levi's mind had gone   
"That's not what I... I mean... maybe? Is this stupid?"  
"No. I get it now... and I don't need to be asked twice, but I think our bed's more comfortable"  
"I want to take a shower after... with you"  
"Then let me take good care of you"

Stripped of his bra and Mike's shirt, Eren watched as Levi touched himself. It was fucking hot. Here was a prime alpha, doing as he'd asked. Giving him the power to say no. Stripped naked, Levi had one foot up on the edge of the bathtub, and he jerked himself off. His mate smelt amazing, Eren already soaking wet with slick, despite knowing Levi couldn't mount him. Licking his lips, one hand shifted to work his left breast, as the other rubbed at his trapped dick, Levi growling as Eren mewed   
"You're so fucking beautiful with that big stomach of yours... you look ready to burst, Bright Eyes"  
"Mmm... feel ready to burst too..."  
Tweaking his nipple, milk started to spill, his breasts had leaked all morning, feeling puffy and swollen in his bra  
"Shit... Eren. I'm going to..."  
Nodding quickly, he watched Levi come, semen splattering across the top of his gravid belly as Levi milked every drop. Panting from his orgasm, his husband nodded to him  
"Do you want me to?"  
"Yes..."  
Taking half a step closer Levi kissed him deeply. Eren whimpering as his husband wet himself across his stomach. It was such a dirty thing to do, but they'd done it to him... and now his husband had asked his permission. He'd given him the power to decide and choose this for himself. Breaking the kiss, Eren choked on his emotions   
"Thank you... thank you... I'm sorry... I'm sorry to ask you too... I don't want to remember them... I'm not there's. I'm yours"  
"You're mine. All mine. Let's clean you up? Then cuddles on the sofa?"  
"I'm sorry... when they did it... I always felt so small... but you make me... feel good"  
"You're allowed to feel good. You're allowed to be happy. You're more than an omega. You're more than you think you are"  
"Thinking about it makes me feel so dirty"  
"You're not. Here, come here. Let me"

Suckling from his breasts, Levi made him come in his pants, then encourage him to wet himself against his leg. It was weird. He didn't know if Levi understood his need to chose this for himself, but he did like the idea of taking it as Levi dominating him and him dominating him back, like they were claiming each other. Stripped down, Levi took pity on him. His alpha massaged him as they showered, working out the knots in his lower back until he could stand without the same amount of pain and stiffness. After their shower, Levi swept him off to the sofa. Laying in Levi's arms felt nice, his husband giving him belly rubs while Titan sat on the top of the sofa, watching over them. Each time his anxieties spiked, Levi was there, catching his hands and stopping him from scratching  
"Are you ok?"  
"Yeah... maybe... just thinking"  
"About what? What's up?"  
"Are you mad?"  
"Mad about what?"  
"What I asked you to do"  
"No. No, I'm not mad. I was worried it'd upset you"  
"It's weird isn't it? That it comes back so easily"  
"It's not weird at all. I could have killed Floch when his lawyer started"  
"I didn't get it at first"  
"I didn't either, but I'm proud of you and we know what's coming now"  
"Yeah... more shit"   
"If you don't want to testify, I'll steal you away"  
"Today was hard, but I got to choose my words"  
"And you did so well. Tomorrow's going to be hard too"  
"Mmm..."  
"And I'll be there. Erwin's given his testimony, so he's going to be there. You're not going through this alone"  
"It feels lonely up there"  
"I know. But you're doing so well, just a little longer and it'll be done"  
"God, I really hope so"  
"So do I"

 

*  
Levi kept him up most of the night again, though this time it was his husband having nightmares. Nuzzling and kissing Levi's neck, his alpha would wake for him, stay awake for a few moments, then fall back to sleep. His sleep cycle was more of a doze anyway, having to get up and pee every 5 minutes made sure of that.

Come morning, Eren was ready to go back to bed, so Levi left him "sleeping". It lasted all of half an hour before he dragged himself out of bed and made himself look presentable. Hanji was busy, so Eld was taking Viren and Anna for the day. His son had thrown himself onto he and Levi when Hanji had dropped him back the previous day. Everyone had gone into panic mode over Viren's innocent act. It'd hurt, but it'd been more shock than actually pain. Levi had growled at Viren, Viren and Anna had both started crying and Hanji was fussing so much that even he started panicking. When things had calmed back down, there was no bleeding or fluid loss, and it'd been a giant stress over something minor.

Checking himself out in the mirror, Eren sighed as he smothered his stomach with Vitamin E cream. It'd helped with his stretch marks, but he knew his stomach would never be the same. He was huge... ridiculously so. And itchy as hell as long his underwear line. Watching his stomach move as the pups did, the taunt skin seemed all too thin as a small foot pushed up against it. The things mothers went through for their pups...

Dressed in a tight white top with a nice open jacket over it, and a pair of dark blue jeans, he definitely looked overly feminine. Levi's words about not caring how he dressed coming to mind, and his desire for something that didn't have buttons resulted in him shimmying into a top that barely covered his bump. Mike's shirt would have been fine, had they remembered to move it from the washing machine and into the dryer. Eren finding their washing still in the machine when he'd gone looking for said shirt. Walking out to the kitchen, both pups were still kicking up a storm as he came up to Levi's side  
"Need any help?"  
Turning to him, Levi kissed him on the nose by accident. Both of them snorting at the action  
"I've got it under control. What do you want for breakfast?"  
"Plain toast and a glass of milk. Indigestion is a bitch"  
"I'm sorry you're going through this. I'll get your pills too"  
"Thanks..."  
Tugging on the cuffs of his jacket, Eren lingered. He didn't know if he looked alright for court, and Levi hadn't told him he looked nice  
"Something wrong?"  
"No... no... I'll go sit"  
"I'm missing something, aren't I?"  
"You're fine... I... do I look ok?"  
"You always look good to me"  
"Lee"  
"Sorry. Yes, you're ok for court. Though I don't know if I like how tight your shirt is..."  
"I... don't have anything that fits. I'm bigger now than I was with Viren"  
"It's that all? We can pick you up some new clothes. I don't mind at all... and don't give me that look. You're beautiful"  
"I'm sorry... I asked for attention, didn't I?"  
"No. Maybe a little, but I should have given it to you the moment I noticed. Your stomach is so fucking hot"  
"I feel fat"  
"No. You're not fat. You're beautiful and pregnant, and sexy as fuck. It makes me want to be a bad daddy"  
"Ok. That's enough attention"  
"Did Viren bruise you yesterday?"  
"A little... it doesn't hurt too much"  
"Let Mike know if it does. I know there was no blood, but it was still a hard blow"  
"He's solid for a toddler"  
"That he is. Now, go sit down and I'll get everything ready"

 

Breakfast then court... same as the day before. Eld was baby sitting, so like the day before, Viren gave him a kiss and then was off for some adventure while Levi argued with him over the wheelchair. He hated the stupid thing more than he'd ever hated the boot he had to wear for his stupid ankle. Once again, he was in Mike's care, because apparently people didn't have jobs to at, or husbands to be babysitting. It was all much the same as the previous day, yet felt so very different since he'd taken the stand to be harassed... and it was nice to have someone there while he waited.

Sworn in again, and sitting in same seat, he stared out across the court. Finding Erwin's hulking form next to his smaller husband, the man gave him the thumbs up, while Levi elbowed Erwin in the ribs. He wished he could be carefree like that. Instead he took his oath and sighed to himself. Dressed in another over priced suit, Floch's lawyer was once again all smiles  
"Hello Eren. Are you ready to get started?"  
"Yes"  
"Excellent. Now. Yesterday we talked about your brother Zeke, today I was hoping you could tell us all about your life with him"  
And like yesterday, Nick's lawyers objected. The judge gave a weary sigh, leaving Eren feeling sorry for them  
"How does this pertain to the trial?"  
"Establishing if Zeke knew of Grisha being alive"  
"Very well then, you made proceed"  
For a case about Nick, there was a hell of lot happening in relation to Eren and his family   
"Eren, if you please"  
Nodding, he really didn't please  
"Zeke was my older brother. Until the hospital introduced us, I didn't know he'd existed. He, however, did know about me. I was terrified when he first came. I didn't know him, and I've always had messed up heats and a weaker than normal scent... and then there was this stranger I was supposed to rely on"  
"So you didn't get along with Zeke to being with?"  
"It was... awkward. But he did his best. He taught me how to read and write, something I hadn't done since the age of 10. Because my body was messed up, and I couldn't talk, he got me into dancing as a form of rehabilitation. He had rules, but it was nice not being chained up like an animal"  
"You say your brother had rules? Can you elaborate?"  
"No social media accounts. No making a scene. No bank account and No ID. He used to say we had to be careful or they'd find us. He also had rules around the house. I had to pay rent. I couldn't be friends with alphas or talk to them. Because my heats were so mild, I still had to work through them. If I got sick, or a upset, I'd climb into bed with him. I used to hurt myself during my heats... I'd try to scratch between my legs... I didn't used to understand why, but Zeke would clean me up. He chose my clothes and hair. He controlled my diet. I couldn't weigh too much, because people wouldn't pay a fat dancer. He was the one who got me a job at the club. Then made Reiner Braun and Bertholdt Hoover get jobs there so they could watch me..."  
"Just a second, would you mind explaining who they are?"  
"Oh. Reiner and Bertholdt were two alphas that lived with Zeke and I. Zeke had something on them. Both of them were there... were there when... he was killed"  
"So Zeke was controlling?"  
"I thought he was trying to teach me. He made me pay bills and rent, and for food. He said he was trying to teach me... because no one ever had. He'd tell me when I'd been good or bad"  
"So he taught you to read and write?"  
"Yeah... but Levi taught me how to do it better. When I was with Zeke, it was more like a game. I knew the words by matching them together, like matching pictures. My phone did that spelling thing, so I could guess some things. Zeke only made sure I knew the basics, and I was supposed to be happy with that"  
"Levi is your alpha?"  
"Levi Ackerman. He's my husband and mate"  
"And did he like Zeke?"  
"No... but he hardly knew anything about him. Zeke didn't like Levi though. He called him a bad influence... and it was better Zeke didn't know Levi. It was safer"  
"What do you mean "safer"?"  
"Zeke. Zeke got violent when I was involved. He put Bertholdt in hospital for being nice to me. He burned down the club I danced at once I got fired... he um... he killed people too"  
"He killed people?"  
"The people of the foster home... he killed them..."  
Eren's voice was barely a whisper. He'd fucked up by saying that...  
"Did you tell anyone that?"  
Eren nodded   
"No one listens to what omegas say. We're either lying or being dramatic... I never thought alphas could care until I met Hanji, Levi and Moblit"  
"And how did you meet them?"  
"I was dancing and an alpha pulled me off the stage. It's really common. A lot of dancers are harassed and abused. Hanji and Levi rushed to help me because I landed on a glass. A few weeks later, I busted my ankle. This lead to my brother abandoning me at the hospital, and Hanji and her husband Moblit taking me in"  
"They sound like good people"  
"They are... because of my past, I had problems with male alphas, but they helped me through it... I'd never met anyone who would just open their home like that. They didn't expect anything of me. Didn't force me to do anything. They were just there"

"Where is this line of questioning even going? My client had nothing to do with any of this"  
"He has a point. Make your point councillor"  
Eren swallowed hard. Zeke might have been planning to sell him... but talking about him make him miss him...  
"Right. I'm sorry, getting back to the matter at hand. Eren, what can you tell me about your brother's murder?"  
Wiping his face, Eren sniffled and nodded  
"My brother was murdered by Reiner and Bertholdt... I... I was at our apartment. I had a fight with Hanji, an Levi and ran away. One of Zeke's friends picked me up... and brought me back to him. I was in heat and stupidly opened the door. I thought it was Zeke and he had his hands full... it was Reiner and Bertholdt... with other alphas I didn't know..."  
His voice trembled... tears dripping onto his chest. He probably sounded so fucking stupid  
"Eren, do you need a moment?"  
"I want to get this done... I... believed them. They said if I let them touch me, they wouldn't hurt Zeke or Levi. They knew I was falling for Levi. They knew where he lived and worked, where everyone lived and worked. They were the kind of people who'd go after them all and not care... but they broke their promise. Bertholdt killed Zeke while Reiner watched. Zeke told me to run, but I couldn't... they gave me something and my head was all fuzzy... they broke their promises. He was all the family I had and they took him away... I was mid-heat. They didn't suspect anything until I was taken to hospital... I had laid there with his body for a week... I was so stupid. I trusted an alpha because they're alphas. Omega's aren't anything in society. They used me and left me for dead... I wanted to protect my brother and I wanted to protect everyone else from them..."  
Breaking down into small sobs, Eren rubbed at his stomach  
"Do you need a break?"  
Eren shook his head quickly   
"N-no..."  
"Why do you think Zeke was killed?"  
"Because of our father. I've had a lot of time to think about it. They killed Zeke, and left me for dead, trying to kill of Grisha's bloodline. Grisha said he'd agreed to work for the church, for our protection. But they didn't actually need us alive. They just had to say we were and he'd do what they wanted. He did so many bad things, to try and protect us. Reiner and Bertholdt were recruited by The Church. They later went after my husband and I... Zeke. Dad. Reiner. Bertholdt. All these people were hurt because of what my father did, and it ruined so many other lives. How is anyone supposed to live with that? Knowing your father was involved in selling omegas and their children? They bred the kids for organs and for couples who couldn't have kids. They took babies from their parents and experimented... How could people do that to other people? And do it all for money?! It was revolting..."  
Starting to hyperventilate, he covered his face with his hands  
"I think we'll leave it here today. Medic, if you'll please escort Mr Yeager from the witness box"  
His words affected everyone in the room, but that was what happened when he got too worked up. Word vomit. He didn't even know what he was saying, only that he desperately needed go get his point across and the truth of what happened out there. People needed to know what kind of person Nick really was, and that he was a threat to everyone.

 

Helped from the stand by the medic, Eren threw up the moment they were out the courtroom. His whole body was covered in a fine layer of sweat as he was guided from his mess and into the wheelchair. Tapping his face, Mike tried to get his attention, but Eren was fighting too hard to breathe. He missed Zeke. He missed Zeke and he... he missed his father. Maybe missed was the wrong word, but he was so confused over what they'd wanted from him. He'd been a good omega for Zeke and that hadn't been enough. He'd made himself too visible and was brought to his father for it. A man who only brought more questions than answers... and both were gone... why was he alive? Why was it up to him to carry all of this? Did his father know that someday he'd be in a courtroom, talking about the things he'd done? That he'd be confessing to letting himself be dirtied... and all of his secrets would be spilling to strangers? There were reporters in the courtroom. They'd probably make him sound even more weak and pathetic than he was... Why wasn't Levi ashamed? He'd been so bad. Zeke would be so mad...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for putting up with my small creative liberties...


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cracks knuckles.

Eren had fainted from his panic attack, resulting in another trip to hospital. His husband woke not long after they'd arrived, but Mike was concerned by the flush in Eren's cheeks and the warmth coming off him. Laying with Eren curled into him, his omega was safely in his hold. Mike had ordered an ultrasound, which revealed the heartbeats of the pups were slower than he'd like them to be. All the stress was having way too much of a negative effect on his love and their children.

Left alone in the corner of the emergency department, it felt like they'd been there all night. Eren was still out of it, but if he dared to move, Eren would whine for him... even if he hadn't actually moved from his lover's side. When Mike finally returned, the man ran a hand through his short hair. Something about his body language sending Levi on edge   
"Hey guys. I'm sorry to have left you so long"  
"What is it?"  
"Straight to the point. Eren, I'm sorry, but we're going to admit you. Despite having calmed, the pups vitals still remain low enough that I'm worried. Your own blood pressure is sky high, and I'm worried that it's going to lead to further complications"  
Nodding against his chest, Eren didn't speak   
"What are we talking about?"  
"We may need to go ahead and deliver the pups early"  
Eren shot up in his lap, well, he shot up the best he could given his stomach was in the way  
"No! It's too soon"  
"I said may. This is why we're going to admit you. Your health has a direct impact on the health of your pups, and the trial is taking its toll on you. If all goes well, you'll only be here for a couple of days"  
"What about the trial?"  
"I'll talk to Floch. Your health is far too important and we knew this might be a possible outcome from your surgery"  
"But... I need to make them understand"  
"I think you've gotten your point across..."  
Eren glared daggers at him. Levi raising his free hand in surrender  
"It's not worth your health"  
"Someone has to make them understand what it was like there"  
"Eren... hey. It's sucks, but the pups and you come first. Floch has been putting too much pressure on you since the start of the trial"  
"Don't you see. I've finally been able to talk about what happened..."  
"I know you have. You barely avoided a panic attack yesterday, and today you fainted... you're still recovering"  
"So you think I'm weak"  
He'd walked into that one  
"No. I know how strong you are"  
"Then why aren't you listening to me"  
"Because right now, your body can't keep up with your mouth. I know how passionate you are about omega rights and making the world better for them. I know that more than anyone, but you can't help anyone if you collapse again"  
"I..."  
"Yes. You're being stubborn and I love that fire of yours, but right now, this needs to your number one priority"  
Eren lowered himself back against him. Levi wrapping his arms back against his omega as kissed the top of Eren's hair   
"How long?"  
"Like I said, a few days. If your pups vitals rise, we'll be able to release you"

 

*  
Despite the pups vitals rising, Eren was still stressing over the trial. His husband was a ball of nervous energy, that had chewed his nails until they'd bled waiting for any news at all from the courtroom. The jury had actually stepped in to request that Eren wasn't put back on the stand until he was physically healed entirely, and the judge had agreed with their request, so now it was quality "home time" without the quality. The month sliding away as Eren grew becoming more and more absent minded. His omega had come home from hospital and turned their room into a nest, which he'd rearranged at least a dozen times over the next week. Levi had wanted to stop him, but it was only outlet Eren had at the moment... and it wasn't like his omega could get himself into much trouble when it came to fluffy blankets and cushions. Believing everything was alright, he'd let Eren kick him out the house to go clothes shopping for him. His mate having become so self conscious over his heavy stomach, that he was prone to bursting into tears each time he looked at it, and heaven forbid Levi "accidentally" touched it.

Barely half an hour into shopping, Viren was having a blast. Playing on his phone, the pup was torn between the device and the bright colours around him... and when Eren rang, the boy rushed to answer, refusing to hand the device over and leaving Levi having to hunch over the trolley in order to talk to his husband. Eren was straight to the point. "Levi. Come home". Hanging up on him, Eren refused to answer his phone as Levi tried to call him back. Not sure what the right step was, he ended up paying for everything in the shopping trolley, before driving home in a blind panic.

Rushing inside their apartment, Eren was leaning heavily against the kitchen counter, one hand rubbing his stomach as he moaned in pain  
"Eren?!"  
"I think there's something wrong with the pup... fuck..."  
"Ok, you're ok"  
Jogging over to Eren, he looped his arm around his omega, lifting him off his feet. His husband yelping   
"How long ago did the pain start?"  
"About 5 minutes before I called you. Wait! Where's Viren?!"  
Looking around the apartment, it took Levi a moment  
"I... may have left him in the car"  
Groaning at him, Eren shook his head   
"You forgot our son?!"  
"You said to come home and I panicked"  
"Levi!"  
"I feel stupid enough as it is..."  
"How do you forget a whole human?!l  
"I said I'm sorry"  
"No you didn't"  
"Well I am. Hold onto me"  
"Fuck... what do think I'm doing...?"  
"I don't know..."  
"God... shit..."  
"What happened?"  
"Titan jumped on my stomach and I panicked. He pulled me out a nightmare... and into a world of pain"  
It was Levi's turn to groan  
"Seriously?!"  
"It wasn't like it was on purpose"  
"I just... how?"  
"I went to bolt and thought I strained my back, but it hurts more around the front too... my head doesn't always let me remember I'm pregnant when I'm coming out of a nightmare"  
"Do you want to talk about it?"  
"No. It was about you, anyway"  
"About me?"  
The elevator took its sweet time to arrive. He'd barely remembered to lock the door with Eren's silent help, and then he'd nearly forgotten to push the button. Stepping in, Eren pressed the basement button for them  
"What happened?"  
"I told you"  
"No. In your nightmare"  
"Reiner was trying to kill you again"  
"Fucking arsehole"  
"That's what I said"  
"Seriously. Can't the blonde fuck just fuck the hell off?"  
"It's not like I was particularly happy to see them. This pregnancy is throwing me some pretty fucked up dreams"  
"I'm the only alpha you should be dreaming about"  
"You were there. You were and you ended up nearly dying and I don't want to think about it when you child is trying to kill me from the inside out"  
"Ok... ok... here we go"

 

Viren was screaming up a storm in the back seat, Eren was pissed at him for forgetting their son and Levi was in meltdown about the possible loss of their pup. A fucking nightmare and a strained back... if their pup died from that... he had no idea what the fuck the fallout would be. Eren had had so many nightmare, flight instead of fight, fuelled wake ups. But this would just be the fucking cherry on the cake for this to be the reason they lost the pup. Even if he'd been there, he might not have been able to change anything... hopefully it was just a strained back... and nerve pain from muscle contractions.

Arriving at the hospital, he was definitely going to piss off more than a few people with his parking. Nearly forgetting Viren again as he rushed to help Eren, he was a complete and total mess over everything. Eren was in pain, something his alpha wouldn't shut the fuck up over. His dynamic had stripped him of reason, and any chance of acting calmly. He was like one of those idiot alphas on TV as he ushered Viren into the Emergency Department waiting room. Olou for once in his life didn't make things even worse, sending a nurse to open the door for him before he could even yell at the stuttering fool. Laying Eren out on the bed, his omega writhed with pain. The crotch of his sweat pants damp as the doctor on duty came rushing over to him. Explaining everything, Eren was taken away from him, and Levi was reunited with his son... who's little legs hadn't been able to catch up...

 

An hour later, Viren was with a nurse as Levi was with Eren... Eren babbling and crying as Levi held his hand. Wheeled in to surgery, Eren had been given an epidural as their pup was coming out. Their "first" twin's vitals were strong, but their "second" little one wasn't doing so great. Eren hadn't stopped apologising since Levi had been told he needed an emergency caesarean. Hushing Eren, he nuzzled his face, careful not to disturb his oxygen mask. It wasn't how he thought today was going to go, but if their child needed to come out to have a chance at surviving, that was what was happening. Setting up the privacy screen, Levi had thought that the current attention would be performing the caesarean, but when Mike walked in, his heart leapt. No offence to the other doctor, but Mike knew the ins and outs of Eren's complicated case  
"Sorry I'm late to the party. I was just taking a nap. Eren, I see we're going to have a baby. Let's get in there"  
"He's freaking out"  
"I can see that, but don't worry. Even Levi here can perform a caesarean"  
"Even. What is this even? We both know how complex it can be"  
"I was trying to make him feel better. Now, it's probably going to feel a little weird, but Levi's going to be right here with you"  
Mike turned to the closest nurse assisting, double confirming the epidural and catheter were in place. Wiping down Eren's stomach, Eren whined softly, Mike nodding to them both   
"Alright, let's get your baby..."

Mike gave a running commentary, probably more for Eren's sake than his. It was the longest 45 minutes of Levi's life, and he'd had plenty of long arse minutes before, and no doubt more would come, but the wait was excruciating. Eren was still crying, but his sob's had grown to small hiccups. Hidden from view, Levi was glad he didn't have to see down there, and that Eren couldn't either. His poor omega was probably just as confused as he was over how fast everything was happening   
"Dad, are you going come cut the cord?"  
Eren had a death grip on his hands, he couldn't have, even if he really did want to  
"I can't move at the moment"  
Mike laughed softly, Levi could see him moving, then came a small cry. It was all so fucking perfect. Assisting, the cord was cut by the nurse  
"One beautiful baby boy... he's going to be staying with us for a while, but first, it's time for some mum cuddles, while we get mummy cleaned up"

Taken first to be wiped down, their newborn son was moved to Eren's chest. Eren releasing his hand immediately to place it on their pup's back. Levi letting out a sob of relief over the sight as he did. The poor little boy's growth was glaringly obvious... once his stats had improved, he'd be off for another surgery, but for now, Levi was falling in love all over again. It didn't matter that he still had birth on him, or the tumour or anything else. Their... their son was perfect. Another little boy... God, how he hoped he'd look like Eren... Nuzzling Eren's cheek, he cried freely as he whispered words of praise between kisses  
"Your other pup is stable. The amniotic sack hasn't ruptured, nor is there any signs of placental separation. 31 weeks is in the acceptable range for delivery, and he has a high chance of survival, but at this point, I feel leaving him there would be the best move"  
"You... can do that?"  
"Yes, Levi. Come on. You know this. You had the same training I did, for your Paramedic degree. There are cases when twins or triplets are born days or even weeks apart"  
What did Mike want him thinking about? All he could think about was how tiny the baby against Eren's chest was, and how incredibly proud he felt  
"I'm going to go ahead and close. Eren still has 9 weeks, which means there is still plenty of growing for this one to do"  
Eren let out a small whine of confusion   
"Lee...?"  
Staring down at their son, Eren looked enraptured by the boy's existence...  
"He's perfect... like you... I'm so proud of you"  
"He's here... he's so small... but what about the other pup"  
"They're fine. Mike's going to close you now"  
"They're not coming out?"  
"No, Bright Eyes. That one, he's doing just fine. He still needs to do a bit more growing"  
"But they're twins..."  
"Mhmm. Fraternal twins. Your water didn't break, and he's just fine"  
Which meant Eren had wet himself in pain... he'd have to hide the evidence from his mate   
"Boys. They're both boys?"  
"Yeah, Eren. Two beautiful boys. Just like their beautiful mother. I'm so fucking proud"  
Hiding his face against Eren's, Levi continued to cry tears of earnest. They'd known it could happen, and there was a high chance of it happening as the tumour put so much pressure on the tiny pup's heart. Most with condition passed thanks to the strain on their heart  
"I'm sorry, mum. I need to take him now"  
Eren nodded, watching as their pup was moved from him  
"He's so small... I don't want to let him out my sight"  
"He's going to be just fine. He just needs a little help"  
"And his brother?"  
"He's fine too. Right, Mike?"  
"Yeah. We'll be monitoring him, but congratulations guys"  
"Thanks, Mike... thank you, for saving him"  
"Hanji is going to lose her mind over this. She was supposed to be on this afternoon, but Anna came down with gastro"  
Eren snorted a very wet snort as he nodded  
"She's going to tell us off again"  
"Let her. I'll fucking rip her to shreds if she dares say anything to you"  
"Lee... thank you... thank you for giving me these pups..."  
"Hey, you're the one who did all that hard work"  
"I'm so fucking proud to be your omega... I couldn't... I could never do this with another alpha"  
"You don't have to and you won't ever have to. Did you see him? He's prefect... so perfect"  
"I... so much for a girl"  
"There's still time. One day"  
"One day... but a house of boys... is going to be chaos"  
"We need to hurry up and convert your room now"  
"Fuck... I forgot about that... I've been so sleepy... and now he's here"  
"That he is. We'll need to think of a name too"  
"Mmm... two names..."  
Crying as they held each other, Eren was taking the birth better than expected. His omega radiated maternal happiness and warmth over their son finally being in the world, and Levi didn't want the moment to end. He had not one, but two beautiful sons and a third on the way. He was the luckiest alpha in the world...  
"I love you, Eren. I love you, beyond words. I'm so proud. You're so strong and I'm so proud of my omega"  
Starting to purr, Eren rubbed his cheek against his  
"My alpha"  
"Yeah. All yours. So good to me little omega..."  
"Love you, Lee. Always..."  
"Such a good little omega"

Trading soft words of love back and forth, Mike stitched Eren back up, before he was moved to recovery for monitoring and their pup was taken down to the NICU. Stroking Eren's hair, his mate was sleepy, but all smiles, commenting on the fact, Eren yawned as turned his head to look at him properly   
"I really like the drugs"  
"So when pup two comes, it's drugs again?"  
"My arse appreciated them..."  
"You'll still bleed, but it shouldn't be too bad"  
"I didn't have to tear... it's a good birth when you don't feel like your pooping out a watermelon"  
"I don't know..."  
Eren laughed weakly   
"Don't tell me you have another kink?"  
"I don't know. I have a you kink. I love everything you do"  
"You keep telling me that... I guess I have a Levi kink"  
"Really?"  
"Yeah. You see, Levi's my husband and he's got this amazingly big, thick dick that feels amazing riding... but don't tell him. I'm not going to be riding him for a while"  
"It's ok. He can think of plenty of other things to do..."  
Eren groaned, still smiling  
"Don't tell me you have a birth kink"  
"It's not my fault. It's how omega pheromones are made. You're calling for protection and affection so I don't hurt you. We talked about this with your first pregnancy"  
"I won't be wearing a bikini again"  
Levi didn't give two fucks about Eren wearing a bikini outside, he wasn't letting his mate out the house with that much of his skin exposed... and when they were home, he was more than happy to undress Eren with his teeth  
"Who says?"  
"My tummy is going to be all pudgy"  
"So?"  
"So, people will talk"  
"I don't give two shits if they do. You're flawless. I don't care if your stomach's softer, or if there are stretch marks and scars, I'll kiss them over and over until you love them like I do. It's proof you carried our babies"  
"But what it's never flat again?"  
"It doesn't make me love you any less"  
"And what if I'm not pretty anymore"  
"You're the most stunning omega I've ever met. You're beautiful inside and outside. Never forget that, Eren"  
"You're so cheesy"  
"Yep. Now, you're supposed to be resting"  
"I am... I don't want to sleep though. I want to see him"  
"Soon, Bright eyes, real soon..."  
"Good... and Viren. I need my baby boy"  
"Viren's with the nurses right now. I guess it's a perk of everyone knowing us"  
"I wish they knew me a little less. Can you find him while I sleep? My omega is freaking out that our pup was taken away... and I want my baby boy. I need him close"  
"Yeah. Of course I will"  
"Mmm. Thank you..."  
"You're most certainly welcome"  
"No need to get so formal..."  
"You literally just birthed a baby... you're so strong"  
"Mike did the work, and drugs are great..."  
"And you're ok with this? With all of this?"  
"I... don't know. I'm just so relieved he's alive"  
"We'll talk about it later, my little omega"

 

Viren was confused as to why he'd been left with nurses who didn't buy him cookies, however Mike had rectified the situation. The pair of them already on their way to find them as Levi began his hunt. Putting a fake pout on his lips as Viren ran away from him, Mike really couldn't pull it off  
"You buy him a cookie, and deliver his baby brother, and you still get dumped"  
"How is he?"  
"The NICU is on it. His heart's weak from the growth of the tumour, but the extra time really helped with his development"  
"All that... for a few more weeks..."  
"Hey. He made it to just about 31 weeks. We are talking about 4 extra weeks which is huge in the development of the pup. He wouldn't have had even half the chance he has now, if he'd been birthed then"  
"He's not that far..."  
"Levi, it's the 21st of March..."  
"When the f-fork did that happen?"  
"When it stopped being the 20th"  
"It feels like he was only just on the stand..."  
And not home for two weeks...  
Lifting Viren into his arms, his son shoved his cookie into his face in an attempt to share  
"That's your cookie, baby. When we can see our pup?"  
"Not just yet. He's been cleaned up, and now that he's out, we'll run a few tests and get a real good look at that tumour"  
"You don't need to sound so fu-forking happy"  
"I'm not. I just want to get the thing off him"

Heading back into the room he'd just left a few moments ago, Eren was still awake  
"Mummy!"  
"Hey, baby!"  
"Hey, you're self"  
Eren groaned at Mike's pathetic joke. Levi wasn't jealous... at all... much... a lot... even if it was in jest. His mate was in no condition to be hit on  
"Levi, you stink of anger"  
"Then don't hit on my mate"  
"Lee, it's ok. He wasn't hitting on me. Literally no one who valued their balls would hit on my in front of you"  
Mike nodded  
"I do value my balls"  
Carrying Viren over to Eren, Eren immediately reached for their son  
"Sorry, Eren. Not just yet. You're going to be weak for a little while, and I know you've been through the drill before. But. No bending, no heavy lifting. No running. No jumping. No carrying Viren around. You get the pleasure of staying with us for the next few days, and..."  
"Mike, just let him see Viren. He's just had a pup, let him see his son"  
"And I have to be cruel to be kind. I'm not keeping them apart, it's just Eren shouldn't be reaching like that yet"  
Eren huffed softly  
"I'm sure you both have big dicks, but can I please have Viren next to me? I need my baby boy"  
"Be very gentle, and if he's going to eat, he stays on Levi's lap"  
"Ok..."

With Viren sitting in his lap, Eren had his hand against their son's side. The angle didn't look terribly comfortable, but Eren was smiling sleepily at their toddler, not fussed at all by the monitors or Mike, and the nurses coming in to check on him. It was clear Eren wanted to sleep, but having Viren close by his side, his husband was fighting it, in favour of Viren talking about how good his cookie was. Levi was still in a state of shock over how fast everything had happened. They'd been snuggling in Eren's nest the previous night, falling asleep after some very heavy petting. Eren had been sleepy and adorable as he shood him out their nest to spend time with their son, bunching his blankets up to hide behind, when Levi kept stealing kisses... and now they had a beautiful baby boy, living and breathing... outside of Eren. He was just... so fucking proud  
"Lee? You ok?"  
"I'm ok... I'm just proud. Really proud..."  
"Oh, Lee. Hey..."  
"Sorry. I can't believe it"  
"I can't either... I really wish I had a picture of him... he was so small"  
"Yeah. But perfect, and he's going to be fine"  
"I love you"  
"I love you, too. I'll see if someone can take Viren for the night"  
"No. I want him here, please... I want you both close... I need to know you're safe"  
"We're both safe, and when you're moved back to the ward, I'll see if we can steal a bed"  
"I don't want to inconvenience anyone"  
"You won't... we won't. Get some sleep, Eren"  
"Ok... I'm really sleepy"  
"I know you are. You did so good"

 

*  
While Eren slept, Levi took Viren with him down to the NICU. Eren wouldn't be waking any time soon, and Levi needed to see their son. Having not seen Viren since he was discharged, the nurses were excited to see one of their previous patients, while Levi was allowed to see his son. Trying to get photos of the baby boy without the tumour or wires showing, the little pup looked even smaller, but so very sweet as he slept. His eyebrows were little more than thin light brown wisps, like his sparse light brown hair. His skin so light it was transparent, and he seemed dwarfed by the humi-crib he was in. The placecard on the side read "Baby boy Ackerman. Born March 21st, 15:39 pm. 15 inches. 3 pounds 1 ounce"  
Their pup was bigger than he'd expected them to be, though barely half the size of a normal, healthy pup... even though multiples did run on the small size. He had a hell of a lot of growing to do before he'd reach a healthy weight and size... and then there was the added weight from the tumour, which looked more like a tail than the huge mass that it'd been. He was so perfect. His hands so tiny... And Levi was gone all over again, crying over the perfection of the little boy they'd fought so hard to save. Mike as right. If he'd been birthed a month ago, he more than likely would have died. All the stress and worry they'd been through, it was all worth it for this.

Recollecting Viren, they stopped by the bathroom, then the cafeteria, before heading back upstairs. In his absence, Eren had moved to the ward. He hadn't intended to be gone so long, but all concepts of time had gone out the window when he'd looked at his son. Sitting by Eren's side, Viren fell asleep in his arms while Levi dozed. It was the middle of the night when Mike came in to check on them. Bringing a chair with him, Levi grunted a greeting, too stuck in his chair to care about rudeness  
"I moved your car, and Titan's been fed"  
"You left and came back?"  
"No. Erwin dropped by. I didn't tell him about Eren"  
"Keeping secrets from your husband again?"  
"This one isn't mine to share. How is he?"  
"Pup's covered in wires"  
"I meant Eren"  
"He's been sleeping... what we were doing before you came along"  
"I couldn't get you a bed, but I thought you'd prefer your car wasn't towed"  
"I forgot about it..."  
"And I forgot to bring your keys with me. Do you guys need anything?"  
"Eren doesn't want us leaving... I think it's going to hit him hard once it sinks in that the pup's actually been born"  
"I was thinking he took things pretty well"  
"He said he liked the drugs"  
"I don't blame him... omega's slick and loosen, but not quite like females do"  
"I'm grateful he didn't have to go through the same pain as last time"  
"No. That wasn't the best birth. But you know, Erwin delivered your first son, and I delivered your second. Mike and Erwin are great names"  
"I don't think Eren would agree"  
"He would too. He's a smart kid. Speaking of kids, I take it you'll need some man power in that apartment of yours"  
"I guess so. Viren's moving into Eren old room, while the twins will be in his ... it'd be so much easier if Eren would just let me buy a house for us"  
"I thought you didn't want a house"  
"3 kids under the age of 4. A fat tom cat, plus Eren and I. The apartment is only so big. Besides... there were a lot of things I didn't want before Eren came into my life"  
"Then why don't you talk to him about it?"  
"Mike. You saw how he was on the stand. He's been so nervous at home... and home is his safe space. He still checks the locks on the doors at night. If that's his safe space, can you imagine how he feels about leaving it?"  
"So you've talked about it?"  
"A little bit. He shuts down at the mention of leaving the apartment. And the apartment... it's kind of being the one stable thing he's had. No matter where he wandered off to, he had the apartment to come home to"  
"Maybe it has something to do with his foster house? Maybe he thinks if you move home, things are going to fall apart?"  
"I don't know. Things have been so hectic. I don't like the fact that we don't have a room where he can his own space. He still needs it. I wish I could say he didn't, but recovery isn't instant and the trial brought up so much shit, that I thought we'd gotten past"  
"I suppose it has. It's also made a hell of a lot people sit up and take notice over omega affairs"  
"At what cost though? We nearly lost our pup, and he's covered in wires. Everything happened so fast, he didn't have time to start spiralling"  
"So... I'll enlist Erwin and Eld into emptying Eren's room. Or should we wait?"  
"For now, we should wait. Eren doesn't take well to people touching his things. Even I get in trouble, and that's over small things"  
"Oh? He gets mad?"  
"No. He starts thinking the things he likes or the way he organises things are wrong and that he's wrong, and it goes from there... it's not that bad... and he doesn't want to be like that. It just gets too much for him sometimes"  
"What does Krista say about it all?"  
"It's his way of coping. He thinks if everything is a certain way, then things are ok. Like, it's giving him some small measure of control to choose for himself"  
"He's certainly complicated"  
"He is. But I'd choose him every day of the week"  
"Well. I'm headed home. Let me know when's good, there's no time limit"  
"Thanks, Mike. And thanks for taking over in there today. Eren... would thank you too"  
"You're welcome. But in leaving Hanji to you"  
"God. She's going to freak"  
"At least she knows enough not to come in while looking after Anna, so you'll have a few days peace"  
"This is true. I'll probably see you in the morning"  
"I've got a late shift, but I'll try stop by"  
Giving Mike a nod, the man patted his shoulder before leaving.

 

"Lee?"  
"Oh, hey. I didn't know you were awake. You just missed Mike"  
"I woke up just as he was saying goodbye. Where's Viren?"  
"He's here..."  
"Can I hold him?"  
"You've got to be careful"  
"I need him..."  
"Alright"  
Rising to lay their sleeping son against Eren, Eren nuzzled into his hair  
"I feel so weird... empty and not empty... I don't even know what he looks like. Not properly"  
"Here. I took some photos while you slept. He was sleeping, and their keeping a close eye on him"  
"Can I see?"  
"Yeah. Mike was just here offering to help move things around in the apartment for us, he won't be touching your things, so we can go through them together"  
His battery was just about dead, but scrolling through photos of their new baby boy, he smiled softly as he moved so Eren could see too  
"Here he is... he looks so much like you. He's got the soft brown eyebrows and he's got brown hair like you... and he's a fighter..."  
"He's so small Levi... he's too small"  
"Hey. He's strong. Like I said, he's a fighter. And our baby boy is going to need a name... do you have any ideas?"  
Flicking through the pictures, Eren sniffled   
"Y-yeah... I... think I was dreaming about him"  
"A good dream?"  
"He was happy... so happy"  
"Then a good dream. When you're strong enough, we'll go see him together"  
"I want to call him Rei... like a ray of sunshine, but not spelt the same... I want him to be happy. I'm tired of the darkness around us"  
"They've got you on some good drugs, don't they?"  
"Yeah They're keeping me numb, so if I have a nightmare, I won't run. We talked about it when they moved me"  
"Oh, Eren. It's ok"  
"It's a lot... this morning I was in bed with you, thinking about snuggles and lazy sex... and now... I'm carrying a pup. Who won't be born on the same day as his twin brother"  
"He was born at 3:39 pm on March 21st. I took photos of his measurements for you"  
"Thank you... but... do you like his name? Is that a good name?"  
"It's a very you name"  
"If you don't like it..."  
Levi shook his head. He didn't know if their son was a "Rei" or not... but Eren's thinking was adorable, and it was a nice change for him to be having nice dreams   
"I didn't say I didn't. Rei Ackerman... what about his middle name?"  
"I don't know...."  
"Maybe we should ask Viren?"  
"Ask a three year old? He'll probably say something like "cookie" or "super hero""  
Lebi snorted. Yeah. He could see that. Or something like "bike" or "red"  
"They're both unique names, to say the least. But hey..."  
Eren pouted, Levi kicked himself mentally, thinking he'd pushed too far  
"If you're going to be like that, his middle name is "Sin". Like Raisin cookies..."  
"Did you just... Eren, no one likes raisin cookies"  
Looking up from his resumed nuzzling of Viren's hair, Eren stared him in the eyes   
"Maybe it's time for a change then?"  
"I'm going to have this stuck in my head. He's going to be "Raisin" for the rest of his life"  
"I don't mind. As long as he's happy"  
"He will be. Every single day, he's going to be happy... and we're going to be happy"  
"I don't know if I'm happy right now. I don't know what I feel"  
"That's old. You and me, we'll figure this out together... how about I give Krista a call on the morning? And we can talk about what's going on together?"  
Eren nodded, Levi leaning over to kiss his forehead   
"I'd like that..."  
"Alright. Is there anything you want or you need?"  
"Just you and Viren close... and... can you talk to me... I don't care what about... I don't want to go back to sleep"  
"Then how about I tell you how I met omega?"  
"I think I know this one"  
"Do you know how I much I love him?"  
"Maybe you should tell me again?"  
"Well... it all started with Shitty Glasses getting fucking hitched..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the creative liberty thing lives strong with me... but you can deliver one twin seperately from the other... modern medicine really is crazy... as was the hundred or so tabs open while I researched all of this.
> 
>  
> 
> And guys, I welcome having errors pointed out. I can't edit anything at the moment, but I'd still like to know what I've missed. I am but one woman with a touch of dyslexia


	26. Chapter 26

With everything happening, the shock didn't hit Eren until he was back at home. He'd been left in a numb and confused limbo at the hospital, yet the moment he set foot in the apartment, he couldn't stop the flood of overwhelming emotions. He knew Mike, Levi and Krista were all concerned about his mental state, and being so disconnected from his feelings had only made things worse. He was happy and relieved that Rei had been born, and he knew his pup would be closely monitored. He'll he was better of being outside of him than in, but the baby boy had such a hard journey ahead of him, while he was still pregnant with their other pup. And that was the main cause of his confusion. He was pregnant with twins, which should mean two tiny little lives being born, only, Rei was now a week older than his twin brother, and they'd always have a different birthday. He couldn't go back and change that... and it made him feel like he'd robbed them of some kind of special bond they both deserved to share. Playing his pain off as exhaustion, Eren let himself be helped to his nest, where he buried himself under as many blankets as was humanly possibly. He didn't want to be touched. He didn't want Levi's gentle and soft hold. He... he wanted to be held by a soft omega, who understood what it was like to be less than ok. He wanted to be held by someone who didn't have the long hard lines of an alpha, and the disposition to match... but now Marco was gone, he didn't have such a friend... and he couldn't bare to break Levi's heart in any way, shape or form, by admitting he wasn't what he needed right now. His mate worshipped him, and here he was, thinking of being in the arms of another. He felt sick from it. His whole body was confused over being down to one pup, and the more he thought about it, the worse it became.

Fighting hard to keep it in, he failed. His small sobs and the tears he tried to deny grew into screaming sobs. It wasn't fair... he loved them. He loved them so fucking much... so why did have to go through all of this shit. Rushing into their room, Levi ripped back the covers to reveal him on his hands and knees, smacking down on the bed as he screamed. The pressure on his stomach forgotten as he took his frustrations out on the world around him. Climbing in, Levi didn't hesitate. Grabbing him by the wrists, his alpha pushed him up to sit, then forced him to wrap he arms around him as Eren continued to wail. He didn't even know what had triggered it. He'd been fine at hospital, but now his mind had decided to betray him... and fuck... Levi was so good to him...  
"Eren? Come on, hey. Hey. Talk to me..."  
"I can't!"  
"Yes you can... come on, tell me what you're thinking"  
"I want my pups! I want my pup! I..."  
Hiccuping and choking down a breath, he was yelling at his alpha   
"I couldn't do it! I couldn't give birth at the same time! I couldn't! I ruined it!"  
"Shhh... hey. Hey, no. You know that's not true"  
"It is! I ruin everything Levi! I ruin everything!"  
"No. No, that's not true"  
Struggling, Levi was holding him too tight for him to escape  
"It is! They're supposed to be twins! Now... I took that away from them! I took that away! I ruined it!"  
"Shhhh. You didn't ruin anything"  
"I did! God! Why... why can't I do anything right?! Why, Levi!? I tried to be good! I ate! I ate and ate like you all made me! But it wasn't enough! I'm bad... I'm a bad omega... they were supposed to be twins..."  
Rocking him, Levi wouldn't let him go  
"No, Eren. We knew this might happen..."  
"Because I'm wrong! First Viren and then... then the other pup! It's my fault... if... if I'd been a better mum..."  
"You're a great mum"  
"I'm not! I'm dirty and wrong! Something is wrong with me! They... they should have killed me. They should have left me in the basement! Then... then this wouldn't have happened! I'm a monster who ruins everything!"  
"You're not a monster. You're my omega..."  
"I'm revolting! I should... I should be dead... then everyone could be happy!"  
Running out of steam, he continued to cry against Levi. He hated this. He hated this so fucking bad...  
"I wouldn't be happy if I didn't have you... you're my mate. My omega... my Bright Eyes"  
Sobbing hard against Levi, Eren's whole body shook with effort. He couldn't even think. Not with his omega having "deserted" him. Even his own second dynamic was sick of him  
"I don't want to be alive! I'm so tired, Levi! Everything that's supposed to be good gets ruined and it's all because of me. I ruined you. I broke you and I left you... I shouldn't have come back... I shouldn't have... why am I alive?"  
"Shhhh... shhh... you deserve to be alive and you've ruined nothing"  
"They're supposed to be twins"  
"And they still are"  
"How?! They're not even born on the same day! I took that from them... I took that, Levi. I ruined it!"  
"No, you didn't... hey, no, you didn't"  
"I d-did! They're supposed to be twins!"  
"They're still twins, they're just twins born on different days. It's not that strange..."  
"It is!"  
"No, it's not. He just couldn't wait to meet you"  
"He nearly fucking died! Because I wasn't strong enough!"  
"Eren, please. You're going to make yourself sick"  
"G-good... I deserve it! I deserved everything!"

 

*  
Levi felt helpless. Eren wasn't fine, but his omega wasn't letting anyone in. Because of that, Mike had kept Eren in for a week, because they both knew that when it all hit Eren, anything was possible. Levi just hadn't expected it to be so soon after they got home. With everything going on, Eren's scent had taken an unsettling neutral tone. His omega would laugh or smile, but it didn't feel natural, and Eren couldn't understand why it happened when he didn't feel like expressing either of those emotions. It wasn't until they'd come home that Eren's scent nosedived into the realms of sour, and he'd called Mike to be on hand in case Eren got violent. He was a heavily pregnant omega, with an enormous amount of pressure against a fairly thin patch of skin from two surgeries on his pregnant belly so close together. Yeah. He was worried.

What he didn't expect was Eren's wailed of sheer misery. The scent of total self abandonment hit him the moment he pulled back the blankets on his omega. Sitting there, Eren just kept screaming. Gathering him up against him was all he could, but the moment his skin touched Eren's he felt sick to the bottom of his stomach, and Eren's scent flared with rejection... he wasn't about to let Eren reject him. No matter what was coming out his mouth, or how much it cut to the bone. They'd been through too much, and a life without Eren, was no life at all...

Sobbing and screaming himself into a drug aided stupor, Eren whimpered each time Levi's fingers carded through his hair. His omega having fallen limp against, once Mike had slipped in and injected him with sedatives. Neither of them like it, but Eren was far too upset. Hushing him gently, Levi rearranged Eren in his hold, so he could stoke his omega's face as Eren lay there with a blank stare on his face  
"Levi?"  
"Shhh... he's calming down"  
"What do you need me to do?"  
"I don't know... we were all waiting for it"  
"That doesn't make this easier"  
"No. Do you want me to call Erwin? Or Hanji?"  
"Hanji would only get excited over the pup, and Eren can't... right now. How can he think he ruined anything?"  
"His hormones are out of whack... and he's confused over it all. It is like he said, he was supposed to birth twins, and now they're being born weeks apart"  
"For their own good. And Rei, he's been doing so good..."  
As his voice rose above a whisper, Eren whimpered  
"Shhh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Eren. I'm here. I've got you..."  
"He had a doing so much better than any of could have predicted. Without sharing everything between him, Eren and his brother, he's doing so much better"  
That wasn't to say the pup was out of the woods yet...  
"I'm going to stay with him like this, until he falls asleep. Can you make sure Viren isn't too scared from all the sound?"  
Eren let out a breathy broken whisper   
"Vir-en"  
"Do you want Viren, baby?"  
Eren gave the very tiniest nod, so small it could have been passed off as a residual tremor  
"Ok. Ok, baby. Mike, would you mind?"

Laying Eren down with his head in his lap, Eren's eyes closed as soon as Viren was in his hold. By some miracle, the toddler had slept through the whole thing, and Mike was able to lay him next to Eren without rousing him  
"Do you mind if I call Erwin?"  
"You don't have to stay"  
"I think it's best I do tonight"  
"Then have Erwin stay with you... you two can use the spare bed, just try to keep it down"  
"Don't worry. Nothing like that is going to happen"

 

*  
Sleeping through till morning, Eren woke feeling better. Tears rushed to well in his eyes, but sometimes in life you just needed to have a good, hard cry. Feeling soft fingers brushing his hair, Eren sniffled softly. He still wished he had an omega to snuggle into, but Viren was asleep beside him, while Levi had watched over him   
"I'm sorry"  
"Do... do you feel better?"  
"I needed to cry... I feel so confused"  
"Then we should talk about that..."  
"I... feel yuck"  
He felt gross and sweaty, and pretty sure he'd went himself in his sleep... which wasn't welcome... or Viren had wet the bed. Either way, gross  
"Yuck?"  
"Someone wet the bed... I think I need a shower and some panadol before we talk"  
"Ok... do you want me to take him, while you get up?"  
Levi was... off. He couldn't remember what he'd said, but his alpha wasn't ok with it  
"That would be for the best... I'm sorry for last night, but I need to talk to you"

Levi washed Viren down, before abandoning him in the bathroom. Yep. He couldn't deny that Levi was acting distant. He'd fucked up and now he had to face the consequences... but crying really had helped. His omega wasn't ok, but finally feeling what he'd supposed to be feeling and admitting he wasn't ok... felt ok. Showering down, he made sure to check his wound site, finding it tender but free of blood. His stomach was still painfully swollen, but felt so weird with just the movement of one pup in there. They were supposed to be twins... and now was... gone from inside of him.

 

Finding a new bag of clothes sitting on the edge of the nest, and the bottom few blankets stripped away, Eren dressed in a simple long black single and a pair of stretchy jeans. They must have been from when Levi went shopping that morning. Waddling out, he jerked back as he realised the apartment was fuller than he thought. Mike, Erwin, Hanji and Anna were all sitting at the dining table. Levi was in the kitchen, while Viren was sitting on the kitchen counter. Titan was perched on the back of the recliner, eyeing them all in disgust. 

"Eren! Good morning! How are you feeling, My Sweet?!"  
Confused. Annoyed. But mostly confused. He thought he was going to talk to Levi, and now their apartment was full... and everyone was looking at him  
"I'm ok...?"  
What was he supposed to say?  
"Good. Good. Now. I've popped by and checked on little Rei. He's looking good... and now I'm here because today we are all yours"  
"What?"  
Erwin cleared his throat  
"We heard you a rough night last night, so we are all here to help move things around. You know. Get the things out your old room, and get the nursery gear from Hanji's"  
The old nursery gear was simply Viren's old cot and mattress... they'd upgraded the boy's bed for his second birthday and the decorations were packed away as Viren tastes changed. So... what they really needed was new things. He'd kept Viren's baby clothes, but they were too big for his son... and this was too much. Last night he'd felt too much and now they were all too much. Lifting Titan off the sofa, Eren retreated back to Levi's room. He didn't care if the sheets were possibly still wet, he wasn't ok with this... What the hell was Levi thinking letting everyone in?!  
"Honey?!"  
Nope. He wasn't ok.

 

Cuddling with Titan, Titan had his nose to his cheek as Eren tried not to cry. He wanted to talk to Levi. He wanted to explain that he wasn't ok but that he understood why now. Instead he had a whole gaggle of alphas in the kitchen and no time to talk. Soon they'd be pulling his old room apart, without caring what it meant to him. Most of his things were in a half packed state, but when Levi had invited him into his house, he'd been so careful about that being Eren's space. 

"Eren?"  
Not responding, he wiped at his face  
"I didn't know Hanji was coming over. It's your birthday tomorrow, so they wanted to get the room done today. She was already here when I came out the bathroom with Viren..."  
"You told them... you told them I had a break down!"  
"No. Mike was here last night when you did. He stayed in case you needed anything, and Erwin stayed with him. That was Erwin being Erwin"  
"I wanted to talk to you! You're mad at me and I wanted to talk to you!"  
Titan climbed to his feet, stretching before slinking out from under the blankets... traitorous cat...  
"I'm not mad at you. I'm... hurt. You said you wanted to die"  
Pushing the blankets back, he looked at Levi. Shaking his head, he didn't know what to say that. Closing the bedroom door, Levi strode across their room, before crawling into the remnants of the nest as Eren covered his face. Wrapping his arms around him, Levi guided him to his chest  
"Last night, you tried to reject me. You stank so badly of self hate. You said you ruined everything and wanted to die..."  
"I can't remember... but I feel better because I could finally cry. I wanted to talk because I feel"  
"I didn't think they'd all be here. With everything that happened, I missed that tomorrow is your birthday... it's just us in here... talk to me. I don't want you to die. I don't think you've fucked up. I don't think our son being born early is a bad thing. You haven't ruined anything"  
"I feel like I did. They started life together, and they were meant to be born together. You hear about twins bonds and you know... twins are usually born together. They have their birthday on the same day. It's their day and they celebrate having each other. Now I feel weird. I only feel one pup moving. My stomach is too big and empty. Only two feet kicking the hell out of me. It feels like I've lost the other pup, because I'm still pregnant. It's confusing and it's scary. We have nothing, Levi. All the bedding needs to be rewashed. We have one crib... and even though the mattress is in a cover, it need cleaning if not replacing. All of Viren's clothes are too big. And all of this planning is for one pup, even though I have one still inside of me... I feel like... I feel like when I miscarried. I'm pregnant and not at the same time. Last night, when all this hit me, it finally hit. How much of a failure I feel for only one pup being still inside of me. I feel like because of what I went through, that I'm less of a person, because I'm an omega and my omega is being distant. I can't remember what I was thinking last night. But I needed to cry and scream, and let it out..."  
"You said you ruined me. Fuck, Eren. Mike had to sedate you because you were so distressed"  
"You're mad. Why can't you say you're mad?! I'm trying to explain what I'm feeling but instead you're mad"  
"I'm not mad"  
"I don't even have to look at you. Fine. You're not mad. You're disappointed. Stupid omega had a cry again"  
"Eren. No. You've got it wrong"  
"So there is something! You've been off all day! Tell me..."  
"It's not fair. Ok. It's not fair. The pups doing better outside of you. The other is still growing inside of you, and you're screaming that you want to die. And, your birthday is tomorrow. You turn 25. You shouldn't be dealing with this... you kept going and you nearly lost your life. All I want is you to be happy"  
"So I should have kept this inside"  
"No. No. I was off this morning because it physically hurt to watch over you sleeping. It took hours for your scent to change. Hours..."  
"I... I wanted to be held but by an omega. I wanted an omega to hold me and I felt guilty that you weren't the one I needed last night"  
"I'm sorry"  
"It's not your fault. You're not fine, and talking is a good step"  
"It was like I couldn't feel anything in hospital..."  
"But coming home, you felt safe enough to let go"  
"I guess. I feel so uncomfortable in my skin... and realising how much needs to be done and how little we have for two pups so small... and losing my space. It feels too much"  
"Then what do we need to do first?"  
Pushing Levi away, Eren rubbed his eyes with the heels of his palms  
"Shop for our pup. If we know what we have, we can plan the nursery"  
"Then I'll get my laptop. Whatever you want, we'll get"  
"I don't want that. They're your sons too. And Viren. He needs something to take up his time. Babies need care and he needs going to be jealous and angry that we can't give him all our attention"  
"So special for him"  
"And... we should leave the bed in there"  
"He's three. He doesn't need a queen size bed"  
"No, but for sleep overs and when he's sick"  
Levi took his hand  
"We'll have to agree to disagree on this. We could get two single beds in there. That way he's got a bigger bed, and there space for Anna too"  
"That might be better..."  
"Then we'll move his bed and the queen to Hanji's garage"  
"We're lucky we have Hanji"  
There was a lot of stuff stuck in Hanji's garage... and the attic... They'd be screwed without her  
"Eren, can I ask a question? I'm not pushing you or pestering you over it. But why do you love the apartment so much?"  
"Because it's home"  
"Home is where we are..."  
"I want to stay here"  
"Eren"  
Levi's voice held a hint of a warning growl. He couldn't fight again. His nerves were shot...  
"I don't want to live in a house... ok. I can't. They have basements. I can't handle being in a house with a basement. Other than Hanji's, the last actual house I lived in was that foster home. It doesn't matter if you're there. I can't ok. A lot of bad things happen in houses. Hanji's was ok because she didn't have kids. She didn't have a basement... I'm ok at Hanji's because I know she doesn't have one and I know her now. Here. Here I have safe walls around me and I have a floor. Beneath that is another apartment with someone living and going about their lives and at the bottom of all of that, is the carpark... it's stupid. Ok. It's stupid that I can't deal with something that ended so long ago..."  
"No. It's not stupid. That's the first time you've told me that"  
"Because I didn't want to remember"  
Pulling him back to him, Levi stroked his hair as he sighed   
"This trial really bring up so much shit for the both of us"  
"I fucking hate not testifying"  
"I thought you didn't want to"  
"I don't. But I got to tell my own story. Your words were right..."  
"Just my words?"  
"You were right. Even if they all think I'm crazy or unstable, people don't know what you don't tell them. They don't know how badly omegas get pushed around because they turn a blind eye to it. If I don't speak up... then every single baby that was taken from their mother and every single omega who lost their children, it was all for nothing. And if Nick walks, then he can do this to others. He can start again... and he will. If he was happy to elbow me, or push me down the stairs, then he's going to find a way to revive "The Church". If I can stop just one omega losing their pup... then it has to be worth it"  
"That's my omega. I'm sorry I forgot your birthday... but I'll make it up to you"  
"Can you ask the others... to take the bed out the room? And Hanji to take the kids. I can't play with them. I can't pick them up... and I can't stand disappointing them. I can't. Viren, he needs to enjoy everything he can..."  
"I'll ask them. And we'll spend the day shopping for the pups... did you still want to go see Rei?"  
"Yeah... I feel so guilty that he's in there. I feel guilty because I couldn't even look at Viren. I feel like I don't deserve this"  
Levi kissed the top of his head  
"You deserve to be a mum. You're a great mum. And you're sexy as hell"  
Eren snorted, before hiding his face against Levi's chest. His mood was already taking another turn downwards, and he wanted to get things done before he ended breaking down again  
"I don't feel sexy. I can't stop slicking. My breasts are leaking and my stomach feels empty... and I have to pee"  
"Then we need to get up. I want you to tell me all you're feeling. I want to know. Even if it's something small..."  
"I'm probably going to cry again"  
"As long you tell me why, I can help you through this"  
"I'm sorry about last night"  
"I understand it better now. I might not agree with how you think of yourself, but Rei is here and he's alive. That surgery gave him to become stronger..."  
"I want to see him..."  
"And we will. I promise, ok?"  
Eren nodded against his husband. Levi knew what he felt now... he didn't know how he felt about that, but he hoped his mate didn't think he was as crazy as he had last night.

 

*  
Eren's mood was worse than a rabbit on a pogo stick, and Hanji didn't help. She wanted to talk all things baby, walking into their room and climbing into Eren's nest without his permission. His nest may have been wrecked so badly it barely it looked like a nest, and it may have been slightly out of shape from Levi using it while Eren had been in hospital, but the moment Hanji "cheerfully" came to check in on them, dropping down on the edge of the nest and not realising her mistake, it'd sent Eren back into tears as he hissed like an alley cat and Hanji looked offended. With his alpha set off by his lover's strong reaction to another alpha in their nest, Levi ended shoving Eren down in an attempt to put himself between him and Hanji as he bared his teeth  
"Whoa! Hey. What the hell? You two were taking so long that I came to check on you. Erwin and Mike want to know what they're supposed to be doing and the kids are confused. I thought you'd like an update on little Rei, he's doing so well they're going to operate next week..."  
Since when were they going to operate and why did Hanji know before they did? He needed to get Hanji out of Eren's nest and calm him back down. His mate had told him his emotions were and mess, and he'd just assured him that it was ok to be. Now Hanji was forcing a conversation on him, when Eren still needed to go to the bathroom and when Eren had just made the choice to face everyone... sure, it might have meant the others had to wait a little longer, but Eren was making choices for himself and that was the most important thing  
"You're sitting in my mate's nest"  
Hanji looked around her at their bed  
"Sorry... it doesn't look like a nest, so I don't realise"  
Eren let out a small cry, having been insulted over his lack of nesting abilities. For an omega who hadn't even know what a nest was, together they'd made some pretty spectacular ones. Sure, their nest needed remaking, but within the piles of blankets, Eren felt safe and that was the whole reason for a nest  
"Look. We were just about to come out. Now get your shitty stink out my omega's nest"  
"I know you're off your suppressants, but you don't need to be such an arsehole. Eren isn't the only pregnant person here"  
No. But Eren was his husband, and Hanji was an alpha stepping into their territory   
"I am well aware of that fact. But you're in his nest. He's going through a lot"  
"And what am I? Just a babysitter to you? You didn't even tell me you had a son! I had to learn it when I stopped in at work! You didn't tell me about getting married. You didn't tell me anything..."  
A crying Hanji he couldn't deal with at the best of times, but Levi didn't get it. Did everything always have to constantly be public knowledge? Couldn't they share things once they were ready?  
Behind him, Eren was crying. In front of him, Hanji was crying. So he did the adult thing   
"Erwin!"  
And called for back up.

"Levi? What's going on here?"  
Standing in the doorway, Levi cursed Erwin for intentionally ignoring the sight in front of him. He should have called Mike. Mike wouldn't question him like this  
"Can you please take Hanji out to the living room? Eren and I were about to get out of his nest, but she sat down without realising and..."  
Behind him Eren choked out that he was sorry  
"Why can't you tell me anything? Every time we talk, you need a favour. Eren's the only one who makes the time to see how I am! I thought we were friends, Levi"  
"Hanji, that's enough. Let's have a little talk in the living room"  
"Why are you taking his side?! He's supposed to be your best friend and you weren't even invited to their wedding!"

Behind him, Eren dragged himself up. His scent of pain turning to anger. Growling, his omega wrapped one arm around Levi's waist  
"You know what. We were both fucking scared I was going to die on the table, so we fucking eloped. And guess what. I did. I died. My kids nearly died. I am sorry your feelings have been hurt, but sometimes I need to do things and have time to process them. Levi already told you we fully intend on having a proper ceremony once everything has settle down, but we both wanted to get married before I died and we never got the chance, and as for Rei. I didn't know anything was fucking wrong until Titan woke me up from my nap by jumping on my stomach. It was like two hours later that he was being cut out of me! You were home with Anna, who was sick. So tell me Hanji, what the fuck could you have done if you were there? Nothing. You needed to be home with your daughter. And I'm sorry it seems like you're always babysitting, but how many fucking times have I babysat for you? It's not supposed to be about that... fuck... I'm a fucked up freak, who can't even give birth properly. Who can't even have Levi's pups properly..."

Letting out a broken howl of a sob, Eren's anger was back to deep sadness. Walking over, Erwin took Hanji by the arm and dragged her out their nest, while Levi kicked the blankets tainted with her foul offending scent off the edge of the bed  
"Eren, hey. Shhh. It's ok"  
"It's not ok! I hurt her!"  
"No... no you didn't. Hanji..."  
"I can't even nest properly... I never wanted to be a burden. Never. To me, being a burden is the worst and I am"  
"You are not a burden. It was Hanji letting her mouth get the bett... oh fuck... hold on"  
Gagging, Eren whined in distress before throwing up. His omega managing to get the blankets and not them, but it still wasn't a pretty sight. Hanji's pheromones had no doubt set him off. She may be an alpha and a pregnant one at that, but her anger had seeped into Eren's safe place. Rubbing his husband's back, Eren emptied his stomach on the blankets with a miserable whimper  
"It's ok, let it out..."  
"B-bathroom..."  
"Ok, I've got you. You're ok"

Carrying Eren into the bathroom, his omega took over... finally peeing, before washing his hands and brushing his teeth. Remaining by his side, Levi stroked Eren's belly softly while his mate tried to regain his composure, leaning heavily on the bathroom counter as he forced his breathing back under control. Giving it several long moments, Eren finally nodded to him  
"I think I'm ok now"  
"You don't need to force yourself"  
"Can you strip the bed down? And wash the stuff with Hanji's scent on it. I can't deal with her anger right now. Then, can you have Mike and Erwin disassemble the bed in my old room, and stop by the hardware store on the way. We need wall fastener things..."  
It took Levi's brain a moment to think. Eren had gone from crying, to calm, to be being scared, to crying, to yelling, to howling in pain, to vomiting to now speaking as if that hadn't happened at all, all in the last hour or so  
"Ok"  
Was the only thing that came out   
"Can I have some panadol please?"  
"Oh. Right. Yep. I forgot about that"  
"My head is fucking killing me..."  
"I think your head isn't fucking, nor is it killing you"  
"I don't know. It hurts to think"  
His blood pressure was probably sky high again, and none of this was fitted the category of "keeping Eren calm so he didn't work himself up and into labour". Kissing Eren's cheek, he then went about retrieving panadol from Eren's drawer   
"We need to talk to Floch too. I need to finish testifying. And Nick's team wanted to abuse me some more"  
"Eren, you just came out of hospital"  
"I know. But if we get things done now, we don't have to worry about them later. And if we're doing things, I don't have to think about the fact Hanji knew Rei was scheduled for surgery before we did"  
"I was wondering the same thing. We'll ask when we go in, ok?"  
"I really want to see him... they said he can't come home though..."  
Shit. The tears were back. None of them really knew how long Rei would be calling the NICU home for   
"They said he couldn't come home until he was bigger, but we can see him every single day"  
"I want to hold him again. I didn't get to hold him for long enough"  
And Levi hadn't been able to hold him at all... he could only watch him through the humi-crib  
"And you will. I need to strip the bed now, will you be alright in the living room?"  
"Y-yeah... I don't know what to say to Hanji though"  
"Just give her some space. The kids will probably be more interested in giving you cuddles"  
Eren sniffled and nodded, before groaning  
"What?"  
"I have to pee again... I feel like I'm going crazy"  
"You peed a whole 5 minutes ago, you're probably due again"  
Straightening the best he could, Eren wiped his face   
"Do I look as bad as I feel?"  
"You're beautiful"  
"You're bullshitting"  
"Maybe a little. Are you going to be alright with three other alphas here?"  
"Hanji's off her suppressants with the pregnancy, she's all I can smell. I mean, if I get close to Mike or Erwin I can smell them, but I can smell Hanji the best. She's nearly stronger than your scent"  
"Alright. She's leaving"  
"Lee..."  
"Eren. You're not being a burden or selfish. You told me twice now how unokay you feel right now. Once things calm down, we'll talk with Hanji"  
"I don't want to throw her out..."  
"We're not. Mike shouldn't have let her in"  
"Lee. She's our friend"  
"And this is our space for us. You shouldn't be so scared you're vomiting in fear and distress"  
Eren huffed, his bottom lip was still quivering and his brat nearly needed to wash his face   
"No one said I was mentally sound"  
"You're a lot more, than you give yourself credit for"  
"I feel mental... Can we still look at baby things?"  
"Of course. Though, I really need to figure out what to get you for a present"  
"Can't I just spend the day with you and Viren?"  
"You will be... but, Bright Eyes, you take such good care of us on our birthdays. I'm going to take just as good care of you tomorrow"  
"I don't want a party or anything. Just you and Viren, and to see Rei"  
"Yeah, Eren. The four of us sounds perfect"  
And a small party for the three of them. He'd have to find a way to get everything delivered and find a gift Eren would love. He could have the photos of Rei printed, but they wouldn't be delivered in time... He'd had a whole fucking where Eren was in hospital, and he'd fucking forgotten about his birthday in its entirety. Eren might be playing it down, but he'd forgotten about his own husband's birthday. That didn't sit right with him at all.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is shooooort. But I wanted to give them this chapter... I'm a nice person! On occasion

Rei's surgery had taken place early on the morning of the 5th. Swept up in reconfirming their love for each other, by the time Levi had woken to find it lunch time, their pup was already in theatre... and Eren was a stressing mess. His omega feeling sick with guilt over not being there to say "goodbye" before the procedure in case something happened. After leaving the court house, they'd had a few intimate hours together before their apartment was gatecrashed by their friends. Krista scolded Eren for his behaviour, before giggling how she was so proud of him. Apparently despite the fact Eren had been escorted out the courtroom, Floch had still planned to call him back. A plan that had been ruined by the fact that "they'd snuck off to fuck", in Erwin's words. Mikasa and Armin hadn't joined the others, but Eren didn't mention it, so, neither did Levi. He hadn't been impressed to see them at the courthouse, but the pair had insisted that they were there to show Eren their support. He'd half expected Connie and Sasha to show up sprouting the same nonsense, but thankfully they hadn't.

They had an hour long wait before there was any news on Rei. The tiny premie back in the NICU, and while they couldn't touch him, Eren sobbed in relief that their son had come through the surgery. His back no longer carrying its "tail", though there were definitely more wires and cords around the small pup than there were before. He'd need another surgery once he got older, and possible more in the future, but for now. He was ok, and that was the main thing.

 

It was another two weeks before things settled down in the apartment. Trying to tell Eren to rest did nothing, the omega throwing himself into arranging and decorating the nursery, until it was finally up to Eren's standards. Both new cots were assembled, Rei's cot made up with soft green blankets, while his brother's was made up with soft blue blankets. They'd reused the furniture they'd bought for Viren, as Viren now had the wardrobe in Eren's old room. They'd had a small incident with their son pulling down one of Eren's old set of bedside drawers on himself. Viren giving himself a split lip and bloodied nose for his troubles, but now it was safely anchored to the wall, and the toddler was going out of his way to avoid Titan, who he'd been trying to reach in the first place.

As for their room, Eren had remade their nest at least a dozen times... mostly because they hadn't been able to keep their hands off each other. Eren spending more time in his lap, than on his own side of the bed... though Levi wasn't complaining. Especially not when Eren let him record him. His husband had been a little shy to begin with, but when Levi took over and topped, his omega was more than happy to film him as he fucked himself senseless. Each day Eren's stomach seemed to swell further as his breasts grew larger. Levi was completely addicted to it, and if they were having sex that meant Eren was spending less time sleeping, and less time suffering nightmares.

Listening to the toilet flush, Levi sighed to himself. Eren had been up and down all night. His omega stripping down to his underwear because he was hot and uncomfortable. Though with how many times he'd been up down, Levi wondered why his husband didn't just stay in the bathroom. When the shower turned on, the alpha dragged himself out of bed. Heading into the bathroom, Eren was standing in the shower. His forehead against the wall, as he rubbed his hanging stomach, letting out small hisses as he did. Even under the running water, Levi could smell something off in his sweetness  
"Eren?"  
"Contractions"  
"Contractions?"  
Levi's voice shot up an octave...   
"I think they're just hicks... but they're getting pretty uncomfortable"  
Swallowing down the thick lump in his throat, Levi shook his head   
"You smell sweater... are you sure they're not..."  
"Don't even say it"  
"Eren"  
"I'm not due yet"  
"Bright Eyes, your body is going to decide when it's time. You can't will it not to be"  
"Lee..."  
"I think we better head in"  
"No... it's too soon"  
"Eren..."  
"It... hurts..."  
"Ok. That's it. Shower over"  
"No..."  
Reaching into the shower, Levi turned the taps off. Gathering Eren into his hold, his husband whimpered  
"How close?"  
"I don't know..."  
"When they did start?"  
"Off and on since this morning. That's why I thought they were fake... I know what labour feels like..."  
Clutching his stomach harder, Eren shuddered through a groan  
"Yeah. And how's that starting to feel for you?"  
"Like... maybe I'm in labour"  
Supporting Eren through to their room, he sat him down on the edge of their bed  
"I'm going to grab a towel and dry you down"  
Eren nodded, fear flooding his scent  
"Hey. Hey, it's ok"  
"It's too soon. Couldn't this... be a false alarm?"  
"It could be, but I'm not risking it"  
"Can't we fall asleep and try again later?"  
"If it's a false alarm, I'll let you sleep all you want"

Getting Eren dried was going so well, until Levi got him to stand. Eren let out a miserable whine as fluid pattered onto the flood between his husband's feet, both of them frozen before Levi found his voice  
"Eren..."  
"I think... my water just..."  
"Ok. You're ok... we'll get you dressed, and I'll get Viren"  
"Need my bag too..."  
"Yep. I've got it"  
"Lee..."  
Looking at at him with wide, fear filled eyes, Eren's lip was trembling   
"It's all going to be ok. It's normal for twins to come a little early"  
"He's going to be ok... isn't he?"  
"Yeah. Yeah, he's going to be ok. You both are"

 

Of all the days for their to have been an accident, it has to be the day Eren goes into labour. Calling ahead, the stuttering idiot that was Olou informed him that neither Mike or Hanji were available. A violent alpha had caused an issue in the Emergency Department, coupled with an accident, had left things strained. Told to monitor his omegas contractions, Eren's labour was moving too fast him for him to be comfortable with. Eren hissing and breathing, assuring him he was ok, but after an hour, he couldn't do it. He needed to take Eren in  
"Baby, we're going to head in now"  
Giving him a pained smile, Eren nodded as he reached for Levi. Pulling his husband off their bed, Eren staggered before righting himself, before letting out a grunt an sagging  
"Ok... ok... we've got this..."  
"Lee... I don't think... we're going to make it"  
"Eren?"  
"I feel him... Lee, I feel him"

 

Eren's pained moans and mews were getting sweeter by the second. Trying Mike, Erwin and Hanji on a loop, none of them were answering. Trying to coach Eren to breathe, his omega was making some pretty alarming sounds, as he placed dug one heel into their bed while kicking out with the other  
"Eren. Keep breathing for me"  
"Lee... It hurts... he's coming..."  
"You're ok, baby..."  
Writhing in their nest, Eren whimpered and whined. He knew he shouldn't find it erotic, but fuck... the way his belly moved, the way Eren's long form twisted as he panted...  
"Ow... ow... fuck... Lee..."  
Reaching out and grabbing his hand, Eren damn near broke the thing as he threw his head back to scream  
"Don't push! Don't push..."  
"Tell that to my body... I can feel him... I can feel him..."  
"Eren. Baby. Focus for me. Focus. Real talk, baby. How do you feel?"  
"I need to push... I can feel him"  
Ok. He could do this...  
"Eren, I can't through to Mike, Erwin or Hanji. We can try heading to hospital, but I don't know what kind of condition the traffic is going to be. What do you want to do?"  
"I... I'll... here, you can do it right?"  
He didn't want to be in a position where he was responsible for the life of their pup...

"Mike"

Leaping up from the edge of the bed as his phone started to ring, Levi could have laughed with relief. Grabbing the device, he slid his thumb across  
"Levi?!"  
"Mike. Eren's in labour"  
Mike swore softly  
"How far along?  
"It's been over an hour since his water broke, and he was having contractions before hand. I was told not to bring him in, but now it's too late"  
"There was an alpha earlier, trashed half the place before the cops finally got him down. Where are you?"  
"Home. He's in his nest. I tried you, Hanji and Erwin..."  
"There was car crash downtown. Car flipped, took out a power line and it's taken half the inner city out. You know what that's like. It's been all hands on deck. Levi, I'll be there as soon as I can. Make sure he's comfortable"  
"Mike..."  
"You'll be fine. You can do this"  
"But... complications?"  
"He should be able to deliver the pup. There's nothing saying that he shouldn't. Watch his stitch site, and monitor his blood pressure..."  
"Mike. I can't do this..."  
"You can. I'll be there... now put me on the phone with him"  
"Eren. Mike wants to talk to you"  
Holding the phone out, Eren twisted on their bed, moving onto his knees and sticking his arse out  
"I'm kind of busy!"  
Raising the device back to his ear, Levi sighed  
"Hear that?"  
"Reassure him I'm on my way"  
Mike ended the call, Levi throwing his phone onto the bed as he moved to climb up behind Eren   
"Baby?"  
"Ok... we need... to see how dilated I am... Shit, Levi... I miss the drugs"  
"I know you do baby. I know. Let's get you more comfortable"  
They weren't equipped for anything to go wrong. Eren's arse was scarred. He might not even dilate far enough to give birth safely... or...  
Arching his back, Eren cried his name out   
"Levi... please don't let him die..."  
"Neither of you are going to die..."

Ridding Eren of his sweats, his mate was far more dilated than he'd expected. Moaning and grinding against his hand, Eren legs shook as come leaked from his spent penis... blinking in shock, his omega whined again   
"Levi? Is it bad?"  
"No. No baby... you're..."  
"Gaping open" seemed less than polite   
"You're dilated... nearly there..."  
"I want to push"  
"Not yet. Not yet, baby. Mike will be here real soon"  
Drawing his legs together, Eren turned to his side  
"I'm sorry..."  
"Hey..."  
"The contractions were over the whole day... they didn't feel regular... I didn't feel like I was in labour... I don't want him to die"  
Climbing up behind Eren, he pulled his omega back against him, crooning softly  
"You're not going to die. I've got you. I've got you..."  
"It hurts... don't let them take him"  
"No one is taking him. No one"  
"Please... don't let them take him..."  
"No ones going to. You're safe, baby. You're..."  
Eren grabbed his hand, back arching through a contraction. Levi didn't know how to help best. It wasn't his first birth, but it was the most important of his life as it was his child he was delivering   
"It hurts..."  
"Do you want to try standing? Changing position?"  
Eren nodded, as his feet kicked at the blankets, hunched over almost as if he was running on the spot  
"I... want to stand"  
"Ok. We can do that. Here, come here"

Eren wanted to walk, the squat, then walk and squat again. Unable to get comfortable, they ended up with his omega on his knees, grasping Levi's hands. Crying out in pain, Eren looked beautiful. Sweat rolling down his face as his every bit of strength he had went into bearing down. Struggling to breathe, Eren sobbed through the pain, before slumping again. Sucking in a few deep breaths, it started over again  
"Baby...?"  
"His head... Lee, I can feel it..."  
Guiding Eren's left hand up so his husband could wrap his arm around him, Levi slipped his hand between Eren's legs. Feeling his mate bulging as their son started to crown. Elation rushed through him. They were so close, but so far at the same time   
"Can you feel him?"  
"Yeah, baby. Yeah..."  
Nuzzling into his neck, Eren whimpered  
"I've got you. Here, use my scent. Focus on my scent... I've got you. I love you..."  
Eren nuzzled into his neck until his next contraction hit, screaming as he pushed. Levi's hand growing wetter, as their son slowly started to slide from his omega   
"So good, you're doing so good"  
"Levi... it hurts... it hurts..."  
"You're doing so good. So good, now, another big push for me"  
Eren whined through his contraction, falling against him with his complete weight   
"Can't... hold this position"  
"I've got you"  
Guiding him to lay on the floor, Levi positioned himself between Eren's legs. His mate tearing as he clawed at the floor. With a long growl, Eren pushed, their son's head sliding free as Eren collapsed back  
"You've got this, baby. You're doing so good"  
Running his hands down Eren's legs, he wished he'd grabbed a towel off the bed or something softer for Eren other than the wood of the floor. Wiping come from Eren's thighs, his omegas flaccid penis continued to weep, stimulated by the pressure against his prostate   
"Don't you even think about it"  
"I'm not thinking about anything. Only you"  
"I love you, Bright Eyes. I love you. Take a few deep breaths, let the feeling..."  
"Don't tell me what to feel. I've done this"  
"Sorry. Sorry... baby..."

Struggling to birth their son's shoulders, watching Eren tear put a dampener on the moment. Tearing meant scarring and surgery... more pain for his husband. Supporting the baby boy's head, Levi nodded  
"Ok... ok... push! Push for me, Eren"  
"I am fucking pusss... hing! Ahhh..."  
Turning their pup, and hurting Eren further, the boy's shoulders painstakingly slowly slid free. Eren straining to push, over and and over until finally he let out a roar so loud he was surprised Viren didn't come running. Twitching and shaking, Eren sobbed hard as their son slid from his broken frame. Blood, birth, slick and come pooled on the floor, Eren whimpering as he drew up enough strength to finally push him free. Finally. Finally their boy was there... Staring down at him, Levi let out a laugh as he wiped at the pups face, his smile momentarily falling as their son took his sweet time over letting out his first small cry.  
"Lee... want to see. Want to see him"  
"He's perfect"

Lifting him up to lay on Eren's heaving chest, his omega and his son were breathtakingly beautiful. He would have liked to have enjoyed the moment, but there were things that needed to be done... like tying the cord and delivering the after birth. The amount of blood that seemed to gush from his omega was alarming. He couldn't tell if Eren was having a bleed or not. Gathering the towels from their bed, he draped one over their son, Eren in a world of his own as he held him.

It was now that Mike finally made an appearance... with a completely kitted Erwin  
"It looks like you didn't need us after all"  
"Eren's still bleeding"  
Mike pushed past his husband, moving to kneel by Eren   
"Levi, take your son. Erwin, help me get Eren onto the bed. Eren, how do you feel?"  
"Fucked. Can I have drugs now?"  
"I think you've more than deserved them"  
Taking their son into his hold, he watched Eren be gently lifted by Mike and Erwin. His husband crying out in pain as the sat him on the bed. With all the tearing and blood, Eren was going to be butt hurt for a while   
"Levi, let me examine him"  
He didn't want Mike touching Eren, just as much as he didn't want Erwin touching their newborn. But both needed to be checked.

"Congratulations, you two. You have a healthy baby boy. I think this time Mike and I have earned some credit in the naming"  
Swaddled into a towel, their son was laid in Eren's arms. Eren looked completely wrecked, but so very happy. Levi pointedly ignoring looking between Eren's bloodied legs. His husband too out of it to care he was flashing Mike and Erwin   
"Levi gets to name this little boy..."  
"We'll take a middle name. We're not fussy"  
"Well Rei's middle name is "Lee". Just keep that in mind... I thought Hanji might like to use Moblit for her little one"  
Since when was "Lee", Rei's middle name? Not that he was complaining. Rei Lee Ackerman, had a nice ring to it  
"I'll head down and get the gurney"  
"Gurney?"  
"Erwin may have appropriated an ambulance"  
"And Mike may have been completely behind it"  
Eren gave a weak laugh, followed by a groan  
"Don't make me laugh... I want to sleep"  
"You need to stay awake for me a little longer. You're going to need stitches"  
"Hurts"  
Mike patted Eren's shoulder sympathetically   
"I can imagine. Where's Viren?"  
"In his room. Lee, can you check on him?"

 

Viren was curled in up under his bed. Titan laying in front of him, as if protecting him. Pulling the toddler out from under his bed, he gathered his scared son up against him  
"D-daddy!"  
"I'm sorry, brat. Were you scared?"  
Viren sniffled as he clung to him  
"Mummy?"  
"Oh, baby. Mummy is just fine. Here, come here. Do you want to meet your little brother?"  
"I want mum"  
"Ok, baby. Here, let's see mummy"  
Viren was shaking hard against him, his son had wet himself in fear. Carrying him into their bedroom, Erwin was still gone to get the gurney   
"Hey there, bud. Ready to meet your bother?"  
Sleepily, Eren smiled up at Viren   
"Hey baby. This is your little brother"  
"Mummy!"  
"Mike, can you..."  
Mike lifted their newborn out of Eren's arms. Eren reaching for Viren as Viren reached for him  
"He was under the bed with Titan"  
"Oh, baby. Mummy is so sorry. I'm sorry, baby"  
Nuzzling and kissing Viren's hair, Viren wept against his mother   
"Mummy..."  
"Mummy's got you, baby. Mummy's got you. And guess what, you've got a new baby brother... and mummy is going to be just fine"  
Looking up to him, Eren's guilt was clear  
"I'll take him and get him cleaned up. We'll follow you in"  
"Make sure he's ok... I can't..."  
"He's going to be just fine. He's just in shock"  
"I'm so sorry, my baby boy. Mike, can you show him?"  
Eren was straining himself as he moved Viren to sit, Mike lowering their son down for Viren to see  
"He's ugly"  
Eren laughed softly   
"That's because he was just born. You looked just like him when you were born"  
"I'm cuter"  
"You're adorable. And you're going to be the best big brother ever"  
"He's too small to play"  
"But when he gets bigger, you're going to have all kinds of adventures"  
"I don't know..."  
God. His son was killing him. Levi wished he'd filmed the whole thing. It was so incredibly precious.  
"Levi, why don't you take him and get him cleaned up. We don't mind taking him in the ambulance, if he wants to"  
Viren's eyes widened, both he and Eren nodding  
"I think he might. Alright, brat. We both could use a clean"  
"Lee, don't forget. You need to think of a name"  
"I will..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two bubba boys! Hurrah! Rei on the 21st of March, and bubba 2 on April 18th


	28. Chapter 28

Unlike his brothers, Eli Abel Ackerman only spent a week in hospital before they were allowed to bring him home. The tiny boy was so much more quiet than Viren had been, preferring to sleep rather than cry. Viren wasn't convinced about it all, but he was incredibly curious over the baby boy's every move. Eren had a rougher deal with things. Having to have surgery on his tearing again, though this time they knew better than to believe the scans, his poor husband was catheter and bed bound for a week, Each daily hospital visit usually resulted in finding Eren trying to escape down to visit Rei. When Eren was finally allowed to come home, his mate was listless unless he was with Eli or with Viren. As happy as Eren was to have Eli home, Levi knew he missed Rei deeply, and he missed being able to lift and carry Viren around. His omega didn't want to nest, and he'd found the bathroom mirror shattered on Eren's third day home. Eren crying on the floor, struggling with his changed body, and his still swollen belly. His mate now preferring to hide himself away in overly large clothes that left him looking sickly. He didn't understand how Eren could feel so guilty for not carrying to full term. Being a twin, their son was smaller, but he was healthy. Surprisingly so... not that they told Eren that.

Upset over missing his phone call, Hanji had over shopped for them. Bringing Anna with her, the pair were laden with gifts as Levi opened the door to their "surprise" visit. Hanji had messaged ahead to ask if it was alright to visit, and Levi figured Eren could probably use the distraction of a curious Anna. Only, they'd picked probably the worst time to actually appear. Eren was sleeping in the corner of the sofa with Eli in his arms, completely dead to the world as Hanji snapped a few photos. Sending Viren and Anna to play, he was ushered into his own kitchen as Hanji took over the bench   
"How is he?"  
"Getting there... wait... is that food?"  
"Don't look at me like that. It's all microwave meals from work. I thought you two wouldn't really feel like cooking"  
"You didn't cook. You had no hand in cooking these, right?"  
"No. They're from the cafeteria. And you don't get out of it that easily"  
"Thank you"  
Hanji stared at him as if he'd grown a second head  
"Don't give me that. Actually, things aren't great. He wants to bring Rei home, and you know what he gets like when he isn't allowed to do anything"  
"I thought having one of them home would help..."  
"Yeah. He adores Eli, but not being able to get down low enough for bath time, or being able to get up for midnight feeds has him down"  
"Have you talked?"  
"A little. He's feeling guilty over being a parent again, and because "he doesn't look sexy""  
"He's got three kids and arse to die for. He's the envy of every woman ever"  
"Yeah. It's just going to take some time to figure out this three pup thing"  
"Well. I've brought cake. And Anna picked out a few small things, they're in that bag on the table. How's Viren liking his new role?"  
"He's not completely sure about this baby thing. The first time Eli really cried, he did too"  
"That's precious"  
"Yeah. He kept crying for a full hour after Eli did"  
"That's not so precious..."  
"No. That's another thing Eren's worked up over. Giving birth and scaring Viren"  
"He needs to give himself a break"  
"Hanji. Seriously. When have you seen Eren give himself a break?"  
"I know. Do you have a date for when Rei can come home?"  
"The 5th"  
"See. It's not that much longer"  
"No. It's just exhausting Eren more than he wants to admit. The daily trips in, especially when his back's so tender"  
"He's been..."  
"Yes. He's been monitoring it, and his caesarean site. I'm not allowed to look"  
"He'll come round"  
"It's just trying to find the balance in the mean time. What other news do you bring from the outside world?"  
"The trial's still going, but Erwin's been talking to Floch and the jury is getting pretty impatient about the whole thing. Nick's case has started to fall apart, especially after the things Eren said were leaked by the press. Don't worry, they didn't mention Eren's name, but the public aren't happy at all with our boy Nick"  
"He might be yours, but he's got nothing to do with me"  
"Ew. No. That came out wrong"  
"You think?"  
"What about you? What are you going to do?"  
"I have a few ideas. But they all require more money and more capital than we have"  
"Does that mean you and Eren are finally going to be buying a house?"  
"No. No. I mean, I want to. But he's not ready yet"  
"I still don't think I'll ever understand why not..."  
"He told me. It's his past. The trial stirred up a lot and the foster house really hasn't..."  
Levi broke his sentence with a shake of his head. That was Eren's secret. He shouldn't be blabbing to Hanji  
"He's not ready yet"  
"This place is so small... but I guess it can't be helped. I still can't believe you had another baby without me"  
"If you'd answered your phone..."  
"I was in surgery"  
"Well the stains on the floor if you really want to take a look"  
"No. I'm fine. I'd love cuddles though"  
"You have to get past Eren. Eli might love his sleep, but when he's in Eren's arms, he drifts right off"  
"He knows his mumma. Oh. I got you guys formula too... the tins are down in the car. You know, because Rei might find Eren's nipple hard to take"  
"Don't remind him of that. And don't mention the trial either. He's already asked about it"  
"Why not just tell him?"  
"Because I don't want Nick seeing my newborn son"  
"He's going to want to be there when the jury delivers its verdict"  
"And when the time comes, I'll take him. Until then, we're trying to keep this place quiet and stress free"

"It'd be a lot more stress free, if you two learned how to whisper"  
Hanji giggled   
"Sorry, Eren. You know I have a big mouth. How are you, my Lovely?"  
"Sleepy... cranky, bleedy... ugh"  
"The joys of birth. How's little Eli?"  
"He sleeps better than all of us combined"  
Ditching her unpacking, Hanji headed into the living area. Levi taking over, though paying more attention to the pair in the living room than what he was doing   
"Look at him. He looks just like Viren did"  
"Mmm... He's adorable... he's got my brown hair though"  
"There's nothing wrong with your hair!"  
Eren huffed  
"It needs a wash, but Levi won't let me"  
"He's just worried for you. Is everything down there...?"  
"A mess. Yeah. Pretty much. Do you want to hold him? I need to go to the bathroom"  
Hanji naturally pounced at the chance  
"Of course I do. Look at you, Eli... Hey baby, I'm your Aunty Hanji"

Finishing placing everything away, Levi was of with the fairies, came back down when he realised Hanji was trying to talk to him  
"What?"  
"Eren called your name"  
Jogging through the living area, Levi paused at the recliner  
"Will you be ok with Eli?"  
"Perfectly fine"  
Continuing on, Levi let himself into the bathroom. Eren was sitting on the edge of the bath, wiping his face. His breathing starting to grow erratic as if he was panicking  
"What's wrong, Bright Eyes?"  
"I... don't know..."  
Breaking down, Levi moved to Eren's side, pulling his husband to him. Ignoring Eren not having wanted to be touched. Rubbing his back, he pressed three kisses to the top of Eren's head  
"What are you feeling?"  
"Scared... I... I was fine. But then I just got scared"  
"I'm here. You're ok. I've got you, Eren"  
"I don't know why I am"  
"You're emotions are a bit of mess right now, but it's ok. It's just you, me, Hanji and the kids"  
"I know... but I don't know why I'm scared"  
"Was it the blood? I can smell it in the air"  
"It's heavy, but... I don't think so. As soon as I was done washing my hands, I couldn't move towards the door"  
"It's ok... I've got you, now"  
"I hate this... I'm back to hating me... I feel like I'm back at step one again, and I don't know why"  
"Baby, you're ok. Your body is adjusting from giving birth. Your hormones are all over the place and you've been off since you had to come home. I know you. You're punishing yourself for things that aren't your fault"  
"Why can't I let myself be happy?"  
"Because you care way too much about everything"  
"I hate this, Lee. I hate this..."  
"I know you do... I know"  
"I feel so sick and tired. But when I fall asleep, I wake up panicking, because I don't have my pups..."  
"Is that why you panicked? Because Hanji's here? She and Anna brought some food around. I thought you might like to see Anna"  
"I do. I did. I don't know. She's... she's not him"  
"And I'm not saying she is. But she does love you. We all love you, baby"  
Eren sniffled  
"I'm so sick of this. I felt good when I was pregnant, and now I feel empty... Eli's out of hospital before Rei, and that feels wrong. It feels wrong that they were born nearly 4 weeks apart... it feels wrong that he isn't here"  
"I know, but we'll bring him home real soon"  
"What... what if he's an omega? He's already had such a hard start to life. What if he presents as an omega?"  
"Then we protect him. He love him and we guide him, and we protect him"  
"Will that be enough? I don't want him to suffer. I don't want any of them to suffer"  
"Eren, there's time between now and then. Things could change"  
"People think things change, but do they really? Omegas are still treated horribly, and I can't stop thinking about what Nick said. Where do omegas go now?"  
"There are legal shelters to help. Nick was so far off the mark with his stupid church, that he wasn't even on the planet anymore. Even if all of our sons present as omegas, I will personally kill anyone who touches them"  
"All I want is for them to be happy"  
"I know. But can you try and do me a favour?"  
"W-what?"  
"Don't get so caught up in a future that might not even be. Nick's trial has raised so many issues. Even if all you did was open the eyes to everyone in the courtroom, they're going to think twice about their own actions. They might even be the change the world needs"  
Eren laughed sadly  
"I'm sorry. I can't stop all these things in my head"  
"I know. Do you want to head back out to the living room? Cuddle with Eli some more?"  
"That'd be nice... You did such a good job"  
"You're the one who birthed him"  
"Without drugs"  
"No, Eren. No drugs... I was scared shitless"  
"So was I. I still feel so bad that I put you through it"  
"I blame the idiot that caused the accident and blocked up traffic"  
"Not the idiot omega?"  
"You are not an idiot. Do you remember how proud I was at the courthouse?"  
"I remember the bathroom"  
"And you say I'm the pervert... my point is. Times that by a hundred and you still aren't close to how proud I am of you for birthing our three amazing sons"  
"That's... a lot"  
"That must mean I'm really proud of you..."  
"Maths isn't my strong point"  
"You passed your high school equivalency. I know you can multiply with the best of them"  
"Did you just..."  
He hadn't intentionally  
"Maybe. Come on, the bath isn't the comfiest seat, and you've got nothing to be scared of"

 

*  
Whatever was haunting Eren, didn't improve magically, no matter how much he hoped. He found his husband in their wardrobe with no memory of how he got there, and smelling of fear. Viren had said they were playing hide and seek while Eli slept, his son coming to find him when he couldn't find mummy. Eren really didn't seem to know what set him off though. Levi had a sneaking suspicion it was post-partum depression rearing its ugly head again, especially coupled with Eren's deep feelings of guilt over Rei being in hospital. He'd wanted to make an appointment with Krista, but when he'd called through to make an appointment, the woman's answering service informed him she would be on break until the first of June. He could call on her mobile, but it felt rude to disturb her, given how hard her line of work was, and how desperately she deserved a break. He could make an appointment with Eren's doctor, but they'd more than likely suggest medication, and Eren would dig his heels in over not being able to breast feed. Eli had no problem taking Eren's nipple when offered, suckling greedily in a way that rivalled Levi... Eren even making the comparison, while drugged up and in front of Erwin and Mike. With a glare, the pair had been silenced, but Levi knew the day would come and they would both give him shit of taking pleasure in every part of Eren.

Waking to find their bed devoid of Eren, Levi grumbled to himself. His husband had fallen asleep on the sofa with Eli. When he'd gone searching, he'd found Titan sleeping along the side of Eren's leg, while Eli was sleeping on Eren's chest, to skin to skin. As cute as it was, Eren would have been spending the next few days paying for it given the angle of neck. Levi could swear he'd only just gotten Eren into bed... Dragging himself up, he skipped putting a shirt on. Walking out their bedroom, he didn't expect to see Eren talking away on the phone, with Eli on his shoulder. Catching sight of him, his husband rushed to end the call. The smile on his face hardly casual or guilt free  
"Who was that?"  
"Just... I was calling to see if Rei was ok..."  
"Eren..."  
"I know! Ok. I know. I didn't need to call because we're going to see him later"  
"You don't need to be defensive. I was going to ask how he was, and if you managed to get some more sleep"  
Eren looks a little sheepish as he ducked his head  
"Sorry. Yeah. I got some more sleep. You've been running after all us, so I thought you could use the rest"  
"I'm fine, you don't need to worry. So how is Rei?"  
"He's alright... I... I had a nightmare that he... so, I..."  
Walking over to his husband, Levi wrapped his arm around Eren's waist  
"He's ok, Bright Eyes. And he's going to be just fine. I know it's a long wait, but he'll be coming home soon"  
"I know. I... just... it's stupid. But being here, while he's there is so fucking hard"  
"It's not stupid. I'm sure he's looking forward to coming home and seeing his brother again"  
"Do you think... do you think he knows us?"  
"Eren, we've seen him every single day since his birth. We were the first people he saw... he might have been through a lot, but he's our pup"  
"I just want him home. He's... It's like when Viren was born. He's a part of me, and I can't even hold him"  
"He's a part of me too. Only two more days and he's ours"  
"I'm sorry, I know I'm a handful"  
Levi kissed Eren's cheek. A handful... he was two handfuls and a walk over Lego barefoot, but he wouldn't have his omega any other way   
"That's putting it midly, but I think you're allowed to be. You've got three pups, and a cranky old alpha to deal with"  
"And the trial"  
"Yeah. Well. You don't have to go back..."  
"You said I could go when they decide the verdict"  
Levi continued, Eren should have learned not to be so impatient by now, but that was just something else to love  
"... on the stand. And until Floch calls, you're better off forgetting about it for now"  
"I can't just forget. Every time I think about him, I want to punch him in his stupid face"  
"I do to. But he's not worth the assault charge"  
"That's true... if only he'd died when the complex..."  
Eren shook his head   
"I don't like wishing death on people. So I guess I hope he spends the rest of his life in prison, being someone's bitch or something"  
"Personally I wouldn't mind if he was locked in solitary for the rest of his life"  
Though if he had the chance, Levi couldn't deny it was tempting to put the man out of his misery. The man had left too much of a mark on his husband and that wasn't ok  
"Lee. Are you ok? You smell mad"  
"I just really hate people like Nick. I know it's busy, but do you want to have lunch and head in to see Rei?"  
"Its barely 10"  
"Then we'll take Viren to the park. I want to do something with you"  
"Eli's still too small for the park. I supposed we could go for a drive? I don't know, I suppose that's pretty boring for you"  
"We can go for a drive. Sure. Viren loves drives"  
"Are you sure? You do all the driving as it is"  
"I don't mind. We'll do a loop of the city, then head in to see Rei"  
"I'd... like that"  
"Then it's a plan"  
"You need breakfast and Viren needs real clothes... and I need clothes"

 

It was almost laughable how fast Eren fell asleep. His omega had been quiet for the few minutes, then soft snores were coming from his mate. Eren may have said he had some sleep, but Levi was guessing that that was all of five minutes. With Viren still wide awake, he gave his son the job of directing. Viren loving bossing him around about which way to go, and with a full tank, they could drive for hours if they please. Unfortunately, Viren's love for directions only last half an hour, before he wanted to head to the park. Driving back across town to Viren's favourite park, Eren was still sleeping so Levi left him and Eli in the car, the air conditioner blasting as he did... and the car locked to protect his sleeping loves. After being cooped up for so long, Viren wanted to do everything, Levi finding himself being that over aged dad on the monkey bars. Luckily there were no sprains or breaks, though he did suck more than he'd expected, sending his son into a fit of laughter. Scooping him up, he held his son high as the toddler "showed him how it was done". Levi found himself needing this just as much as Viren has. He loved being home, but with everything going on, it'd been so long since he had a workout that wasn't sex... not that sex was bad... especially given his husband was more than satisfying in the bedroom. Not that he'd admit it to anyone but Eren, but Levi was addicted. He really couldn't think of it as anything else, anymore. He loved sex with Eren, in every shape and form... but this felt good in another way. 

Playing with Viren, Eren was the one brought things to an end. Viren noticing his mum from atop the small jungle gym, and deserting him to run over to his mum. Jogging after the toddler, he smiled as Viren threw his arms around Eren's leg. Catching up to his son, Eren raised an eyebrow at him  
"The park?"  
"You and Eli fell asleep, and Eli wanted to play. No one else is around"  
"Probably because it's so hot. You're other burnt"  
"I blame Viren"  
"You can't blame our son... but thank you. I think I needed the nap"  
"You definitely needed the nap. Is Eli alright?"  
"He had a feed before I came to check on you two"  
"He's going to be a chubby bub"  
Eren pouted, his husband keeping Viren close to him, even though he couldn't lift him as he wanted. Placing his hand on Viren's head, he started guiding him towards the car, Eren forced to fall in step  
"Don't give him a complex, he's a growing boy"  
"He's perfect the way he is. The air con wasn't too cold, was it?"  
"No. It was nice. I miss running around the park"  
"I was thinking the same thing"  
"Recovering from birth sucks"  
"You could let your husband take over more around the house"  
"Then what would I do?"  
"Rest?"  
"I don't want to"  
"It's not always about what you want. Are you hungry?"  
"Not really, but is that your way of saying you?"  
"Maybe..."  
"This is why you're supposed to bring snacks"  
"The only snack I see here, is you"  
Eren let out a louder and longer laugh than he'd expected his husband to  
"You're terrible. But I needed that... Do you think they'd notice if I stole Rei?"  
"Possibly... I don't think you can make a run for it right now"  
"Dammit"  
Reaching the car, Levi lifted Viren, staring over the hood of the RangeRover to tease his husband   
"I promise to leave all the feeds and all the dirty nappies to you, when he is"  
"What? No. How is that fair?"  
"Twice as many nappies, and twice as many feeds"  
"You really know how to bring up the worst bits of parenting"  
"Just wait until they both start teething"  
Eren shot him a glare  
"I hope your dick falls off"  
"No you don't"  
"No. But I'm mad at you"  
"Ahhh. But who will drive you home?"  
"Does that mean you'll be my get away driver?"  
"I'm your husband. I've legally become your partner in crime. But we can't steal our son, just yet"  
"I'm going to steal him so hard, when we can finally take him home"  
"And I'll be your getaway driver"

 

*  
Carrying Rei, Eren wasn't game to let anyone close to him. His baby boy was in his arms for the first time since he'd given birth. Eren had tears in his eyes as nuzzled into boy's small wisps of hair. He was so tiny... and soft... and perfect. Smaller than his brother, his pup made up for it with his health condition. He was fine to come home, but he needed monitoring and the nurses had recommended the use of a humidifier in the nursery. He hadn't want to leave Eli and Viren home, but Levi wasn't sure he could juggle holding Eli, while keeping Viren in line, so he'd been forced to leave them home with Erwin supervising.

Unable to leave his pup's side, Eren rode in the back with Rei. With Eli not being with them, they used his car seat for the drive. Levi and car seats didn't go with each other... his husband had said some very creative words the first time he'd put the car seat in for Viren. The same words repeated for Eli's car seat and most probably Rei's, as Levi insisted on being the one to install them... though Eren had a better idea about them from helping with Mina and Anka, as well as with Anna. Watching his son sleep, he must have taken a hundred photos of him as Levi drove. Despite having been separated from brother over a month and a half ago, they were so much alike. Like Eli, Rei liked to sleep with his left hand up near his face, smacking his lips together as he woke, then scrunching his face up before falling back to sleep. Eren couldn't quite believe Rei was finally all his.

Carrying Rei in, Levi placed himself between them and Erwin. Erwin looked bored as he lounged on the sofa, Viren colouring, as the man watched on   
"Hey, guys. How's Rei?"  
"Sleeping. You don't get cuddles yet. Where's Eli?"  
Erwin looked towards the nursery   
"Sleeping. He cried for a bit, then fell asleep about 5 minutes ago"  
Eren frowned, starting towards the nursery. Eli didn't usually cry unless it was nappy change time, or he'd over slept at feed time   
"He doesn't usually cry... I'm going to check on him"  
Levi seemed to be of the same mind  
"I'll come with you. I want to see what happens when he meets his brother"  
"When he meets his brother again. They spent 6 months together... before being separated"  
Moving to ruffle Viren's hair, Levi smiled down at their son. Eren pausing at the doorway to the nursery, waiting for Levi to ask the question he knew was coming   
"Viren, do you want to see your brothers?"  
"No. Babies cry too much"  
No where near as much as Viren had. A full family photo would have to wait for now... Nervously, Eren entered the nursery. He didn't know what he'd do if his sons hated each other. Three boys was going to be chaos as it was, and even knowing what he did now about Zeke, he still missed having his brother around. Moving to Eli's crib, his son was fast asleep, waiting for Levi to join him, he then lowered Rei down beside his brother  
"They're perfect"  
"They look so much alike... I need photos"  
"Seeing them like this, really brings it home. We have two beautiful sons..."  
Pulling out his phone, Eren shook his head  
"Three beautiful human sons, and a beautiful fur baby"  
"Have I told you I love the way you love Titan"  
"He's purrfect"  
"Alright. I get... Eren!"  
Reaching out his tiny hand, Eli's found Rei's. Eren letting out a small cry, while Levi gasped. After being separated for so long, it was like Eli knew they were supposed to be together. Taking photos of them pair of them, Eren's omega was melting down at the sight. Sniffling, he reached for Levi, pulling his husband close  
"All our sons are home"  
"That they are. They're all safe and sound"  
"Lee... thank you. Thank you for letting me carry our pups..."  
"You don't need to thank me, you did all the hard work"  
"I love them so much... I really don't care how many nappies it takes, I love them so much"  
"Silly, omega. You're not going to be changing them alone"  
"I know. You're the best dad they could ever hope for..."  
"And you're the best mum they could have. They look just like you"  
"No. They've got their father's good looks. All they got was my messy hair"  
"And your drool"  
"And your farts"  
"You're the one with the toxic farts"  
"I was pregnant. You're the one who tried to gas us with that arse of yours"  
"My arse is perfectly fine"  
"That's true... God. I can't get over how perfect they look like that... it makes me want another one"  
Levi took long enough to reply that Eren regretted voicing his omega's inner thoughts   
"Do you, really?"  
"Not right now. But a little female, Levi... if the twins had been girls, I was thinking of naming them after our mother's... and Isabel, maybe even Hanji if she played her cards right"  
Originally Eli was going to be Abel Ackerman, but Eren didn't want his sons initials being AA. Kids could be arseholes, and Abel felt like such a heavy name. His husband had messed around with biblical names until Eli stuck. He didn't mind. Eli had been on his list of suggestions for names for Viren  
"Mmm. I thought about it too. I thought maybe Carl, but he didn't seem like a Carl"  
"No. He doesn't seem the type to care about someone ruining his salad"  
Levi started at him blankly  
"Oh. You're in for a treat. You're going to learn all the annoying kid movies off by heart"  
"I can't wait"  
"We both know that's not true... Do we leave them sleeping? You didn't have much of a cuddle"  
"It's fine. I think our pups want to spend some time together..."  
"I wish Viren wanted to see them, but I guess at 3, babies aren't as exciting"  
"Babies weren't exciting until he was born. I really never thought I'd be a dad"  
"It suits you. I still wish you had something to do with your time"  
"I have you guys to look after. And a few ideas for the future"  
"Do I get to know?"  
"Not just yet, but when I decided what comes next, I expect you to be by my side"  
"Where else am I going to be? And who else is going to kick your arse in to movement"  
Levi let out a soft and playful growl  
"Kick my arse, you say?"  
"Mhmm... my arse is still recovering"  
"Yet, you say you want another pup"  
"Not right away... not..."  
Eren stumbled to a stop, realising they'd never spent a full heat together. He hadn't thought about it... what if he went into heat early? Or what if Levi didn't want to spend his heat with him...  
"Eren?"  
"It's fine. I know. I just meant that it would be nice to have a whole brood of pups... but not for a few more years"  
"Is that all?"  
"Yeah. Sorry, I guess I'm more clucky than I realised. But a little girl would be adorable, even if we can't afford to"  
That was right. His savings wouldn't last forever. Levi had savings, and he wasn't saying he didn't believe his husband, but if all Levi's promises over a huge white wedding didn't eventuate... he wouldn't be surprised  
"Hey. You never know. I'm old, but we've still got time"  
"Mmm. I want to concentrate on them for now... Do you think Mike and Erwin are ever going to have kids?"  
"I think Mike wants kids more than Erwin does"  
"He'd be an amazing dad"  
"Yeah... but for now, let's let them sleep"

A few hours passed before one of the pups started to cry, starting his brother off. When Levi went to check on them, he came back holding Rei, happily reporting that they'd still been holding hands. Even if his head was a mess, and his omega scattered, the fact that all his children were safe and together, made him feel over the moon. He knew he'd need to talk to Krista and his doctor about his moods, and about Levi's hovering, but for now, he was taking comfort in the small things. Like the love between two brothers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think the next chapter is it..........


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the last chapter became the second last, as the things I wanted to address became even bigger...
> 
> Now, be gentle. You know our boys are stubborn shits that have made progress, but there is still a whole lot of healing that needs to happen. You unfortunately can't click your fingers and be over trauma

Four months after the start of Nick's trial, it was finally coming to an end. Floch had stopped by to tell them the jury was entering deliberation, and that he'd contact them once he had news. Another week passing before Floch called to say the jury would be delivering their verdict the following morning in court. Neither Levi or Eren getting any sleep the night before. Levi cleaning the apartment in an attempt to sooth the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, while Eren was up with the twins. Rei had taken his time adjusting to life outside the hospital, as he was so much happier than his twin to voice his complaints. Rei wouldn't take Eren's nipple, nor did he seem happy with expressed milk. Eren was devastated, and took it as a sign as his son rejecting him, not listening to Levi while he tried to rationalise with his husband. It wasn't as if Eren rejected his pup, in fact, he was overly protecting of the small boy, but feeding time usually came with a quiet Eren.

Dressing for court, both of them were silent. The mood suffocatingly heavy. Levi had opened his mouth half a dozen times to reassure Eren, only for nothing to come out. The heaviness only broken by Eren having a breakdown over a bloodied nose, convinced that Nick was about to walk free. A week was a long time, a stupidly long time in Levi's mind, but given the length of the trial, there was probably a huge amount of evidence to sift through. Eren had definitely got through to the jury. He'd gotten through to every single person in that courtroom, and then to masses online. They could only hope that Nick hadn't paid any of the jury members off.

Now that he was able to carry Viren around, Eren hadn't wanted to leave Viren home with Gunther and the twins, their son confused as to why mummy was crying. Stepping in, Gunther had gently pushed for Eren to take Viren with him. Eren needed to face his past, and Viren was the dose of courage he needed... but Eren finally pulled himself together, leaving Viren home and confused, crying for his mummy as Eren rushed from the apartment. Even though he knew Eren couldn't help but feel crushed at the prospect of Nick being free, it'd be so much easier if Eren would channel some of that confidence he had coming off the witness stand. There was no way that anyone in their right mind would let Nick walk.

The media had packed the steps of the court. Both Eren and Levi were blinded by the flashing cameras, and hounded as Levi kept a tight arm around his husband. Eren smelt of fear and distress, his head hung as Levi led him up to the top of the steps, then safely into courthouse. Taking a moment to compose and recenter himself, Levi let out a heavy sigh to which Eren nodded. The alpha's stomach was doing flips, nervous like he'd never been before. Nick had taken so much from them. So much from Eren. His husband's whole life had been ruined by Nick and his thirst for money and popularity?, if that was the right word for buying connections. The man a slave to it. Realising several moments had passed since they'd entered, Levi took hold of Eren's hand. He was the alpha. He needed to be the strong one. He needed to be what Eren needed him to be, and right now, Eren needed him to drag him down the hall and into the courtroom. 

 

 

*  
Entering the courtroom, Eren was attempting not to throw up on his feet. He knew that there was a fair chance that Nick wouldn't be walking out a free man, but that was in a fair world. The world was hardly fair. Led by Levi, his alpha sat him down in the chair at the end of the row, before sitting next to him. Effectively blocking him from escaping from the room. He wanted to run. He'd already scratched his inner thighs, which he knew Levi would be disappointed over. The action still so ingrained that he'd fallen back into the habit without even realising it at the time. Taking his hand, Levi rubbed the back with his thumb, the action was meant to be comforting, but he was too far into his own head to find it so. This was an awful idea. He shouldn't have come. He should have had hidden at home with the kids... he could have stayed in his nest and just waited for news. It was all... he'd thought about this day for so long, and he'd thought he'd be strong enough to be here. When he'd come off the stand, he was so sure Nick wasn't going to get away with everything... 

As a large hand landed on his shoulder, he jumped and whimpered. Jerking away from the hand, and from Levi, fleeing as far away as one could without leaving the chair  
"Whoa! Eren, it's ok. It's just Mike and Erwin"  
"S-sorry"  
Now he felt like a fucking moron. Mike cleared his throat  
"Hanji's here too. She dropped us out the front, and will be here in a moment"  
"Ok..."  
Even if they were there to support him, Eren felt almost claustrophobic as the two alphas sat behind him. Levi went to take his hand, but his nerves had him so shaken that the simple touch elicited a whine of distress  
"Bright Eyes, its all going to be ok. Just focus on your breathing, ok?"  
"That's easy for you to say. This man didn't ruin your whole life!"  
Snapping at his husband, Eren immediately regretted it. He could feel his face reddening   
"Sorry. You didn't deserve that"  
"No. You're right. This man didn't ruin my whole life. He just took my boyfriend away, and fucked up my husband's life. I know you're upset and I know you're freaking out. But there is no way that Nick is going to be walking free from this. That arsehole is going away, and he is never coming back"  
"I wish I could be so sure..."  
"He's right Eren, have faith in the justice system. You've taken the stand and you fucked Nick's case right up for him"  
Flinching at Mike's words, the did nothing for his nerves at all.

When Nick finally came in, and the court was brought into session, Eren's heart was hammering in his chest. The man looked confident. His suit perfect, and his combed back as he smiled at everyone like a man who was about to walk free. Trying to control his breathing, Eren felt like he was on the verge of a panic attack. This trial hadn't even been about him, yet his life had been laid bare for all to hear, and he'd nearly lost his pups because of it. Listening to what was going on around him became impossible as white noise filled his ears, his panic flowing off of him freely. The jury came in, and Eren was gone. Biting his lip as he tried to curl into himself, his fingernails scratched at his right wrist. Just a few more minutes and they'd know Nick's fate. The lawyers were talking to the judge, but when he vomited into his mouth, Eren had to look away, covering his ears with his hands.

Too scared to know what was happening, when Levi swept him up his arms, he had no idea what was happening. Erwin and Mike both joined in on the impromptu hug, Hanji barely able to wrap her arms around the four of them. Nuzzling his neck, Levi's tears rolled, his scent filled with happiness. As quick as the hug started, it was breaking apart. Levi pulling him down with him, his alpha's face still hidden against his neck. It took more than a long moment to realise Levi was mouthing something against his neck. Sniffling, he shook his head, trying to tell Levi he didn't know what was happening. Removing himself for his neck, Levi took his face in his hands. His alpha's smile blinding, as he wiped at Eren's cheeks with the pads of his thumbs  
"He's guilty, baby. He's going away for life..."  
Reality came rushing back as he sucked down a breath. Nick was on his feet, spluttering out his protests, while the judge was trying to bring things back under control  
"Guilty?"  
His voice sounded strangled... because he honestly couldn't believe it...  
"Yeah. Yeah, baby. He's not going to hurt anyone again"  
"He's... guilty?"  
"Yeah. Yeah, Eren"  
"L-Lee..."  
Pulled back against his husband, Eren's hands gripped Levi's shirt so hard his hands hurt. Nuzzling into Levi's neck, he sobbed  
"... he's guilty?"  
"Yeah, baby. You're safe"  
"They're safe. He can't hurt any more omegas?"  
"No, Bright Eyes. He can't"  
"Thank god..."  
Nuzzling into his husband's, Eren was practically boneless with relief and disbelief that it was finally over. Not paying attention to the judge, he was confused when Levi pulled away from him  
"Mr Yeager?"  
Jumping at his name being called by the man, he had no idea whatsoever as to why the man could be addressing him, only that his fear had coming back with those two words. Whispering, Levi told him to stand. Eren feeling completely disjointed as he gathered himself up enough to  
"Your h-honour?"  
"Mr Yeager. It is clear to all of us that this man has been directly responsible for untold heart break and pain for omegas. As such, I am allocating you a restitution payment. It will not undo what has been done, but it may go towards your ongoing counselling needs, and the upbringing of your children. You've shown many of us that omegas are still being treated in a way that is substandard, and completely unacceptable in this day and age. Before I decide the amount, I want to ask you a question. You are clearly passionate about omega rights. What would you like to see in the future, for them?"  
Why? What? Why him? Awkwardly, he stammered  
"I... I want a world where omegas are treated as equals... Where they don't have to fear walking down the street, or fear going to school... And where they don't have to live a life of being bred just for alphas..."  
God. Had he said the right thing? The judge let out a long hum, Eren's stomach doing a backflip. He shouldn't have said anything... he didn't know the right things to say...  
"Sir?"  
The judge smiled, nodding to himself. Or, at least, Eren assumed it was to himself. He had no idea what was coming  
"I am awarding you a payment of $600,000, for the emotional distress and damages caused by this man. And a further $500,000 in the hopes you'll use the money to better your life, and those of omegas. This money will be paid from the funds seized at the time of Nick Minister's arrest. We cannot undo what was done, and you are not responsible for the sins of this man, nor your father. Live your life with no regrets, and make the world a better place for omegas"  
Eren nodded quickly, the words hadn't sunk in. Only that the man in front of him was telling him not to carry to weight of his father's sins  
"I... thank you"  
"You're welcome. And I hope to never see you in my court again, Mr Yeager"  
Levi tugged him back down to sit. Eren still processing the words... They were giving him money? What for? He had money. He had a good life with Levi... He liked working for his money... Why were they giving him money? He didn't want their money. He didn't want anything to do with Nick...  
"Bright Eyes?"  
"I..."  
He didn't know what he wanted to say... Nick was yelling abuse as he was taken away. Floch was saying something to them, but Eren shook his head. He didn't know what to do or what to say  
"Eren, you need to calm down. Your breathing's getting out of control again"  
"I... need to go home"  
That was it. He wanted to go home and see his babies. He wanted his boys... and he needed less people around him  
"Ok, but we need to wait while Nick is escorted out. Life in prison is a good look for him"  
He didn't want to wait. He wanted out. He wanted his sons and to be home where he could lock the world out. He thought he'd be happier than he was... but this all felt too much like a dream.

 

*  
Levi watched as Eren walked into the apartment ahead of him. His husband wasn't acting like he'd expected him to. He'd expected Eren to be happier, especially given that the judge had given his omega a leg up, to help him follow his passion of helping other omegas. Heading straight for Viren, Eren lifted him off the sofa, ignoring the look Gunther gave him. Carrying Viren into their bedroom, Eren slammed the door behind him, Levi sighing to himself as he close the apartment door  
"It didn't go well?"  
"No. It went great. Eren's just... I honestly don't know..."  
"So Nick's going away?"  
"Life with no chance of parole. The judge said it was one of the worst cases he'd seen in his 20 years as a judge"  
"Then why is Eren upset?"  
"That's the thing, I don't know. The man even took the step to pay him restitution for what he'd been through"  
"Oh? Is that it?"  
"I can think of 1.1million reasons why it isn't..."  
Gunther let out a whistle as his eyes widened. Levi felt much the same. He hadn't expected anything to come from Eren giving evidence, other than his mate being able to highlight the mistreatment of omegas   
"Yeah. Tell me about it. I think it's so Eren won't turn around and sue the state for what he went though in foster care, and because it's affected every single aspect of his life. $600,000 for what he went through, the another $500,000 to help Eren help omegas..."  
"That's a lot of responsibility right there"  
"Do you think?"  
"Maybe. I don't know. He's your husband, you know him better than anyone else does"  
"Yeah..."  
Honestly, Levi didn't know where to even begin when it came to improving the lives of omegas. He only knew that he'd pulled a rabbit out the hat, and somehow managed to help Eren get back on his feet. But Eren was a naturally loving and forgiving person. He truly believed he'd deserved to be abused and used...  
"I might take off, let you two have your alone time. Eren clearly needs to talk. Both twins have been changed. Rei's had a bottle, and Viren had cereal"  
"Thanks for that. I know Hanji and the others wanted to come back... but until I know what's going on with Eren..."  
Levi let his sentence drop. Gunther got it. He didn't take any offence to being evicted after babysitting all morning   
"No worries. It's a relief to know a piece of shit like Nick won't be back"  
"Yeah. You should have seen it. He was livid. Piece shit got done on drug charges too. I would have loved to have seen that part of the trial"  
"Drugs. Why am I not surprised?"  
Climbing off the sofa with a weary sigh, Gunther walked over to him, pausing to pat him on the shoulder  
"Tell Eren congratulations when he's in a better mood. Whatever he decides to do, I'm sure he'll be just fine"  
Letting himself out, Levi locked the door behind him. He had no idea what mood Eren was going to be in, but he couldn't let it fester.

 

Heading into their bedroom, Eren was curled up around Viren. The pair of them laying in the middle of the bed, with Eren pressing kisses to Viren's hair. Moving to sit on the edge of the bed, he placed his hand on Eren's side  
"Are you hungry?"  
"No. Not really"  
"Then do you want to talk about it?"  
"Nope"  
"Eren"  
"Lee. I can't. Not right now. It's too much"  
"I thought you'd be happy"  
"I'm sorry"  
"No. Just. Don't let it get to the point where you can't talk to me. I know you scratched at your arms, and they'll need to be dressed"  
"I'm sorry"  
"Eren..."  
"I'm sorry! I don't know how I feel. I know I should be happy, but I just feel disgusted"  
In his arms, Viren wriggled out of Eren's hold. Eren rolling onto his back as Viren climbed over him less than carefully  
"Why disgusted?"  
"I don't want his money. Do you know how many pups that would be? How many omegas had to be hurt for him to be that rich? It's wrong!"  
"Ok. Ok. But you know, the judge did suggest using the money to help omegas..."  
"How am I supposed to even do that? What am I going to do? Start a shelter? I'm not smart enough for any of that. The best I can do is keep my head down, and not provoke anyone else further"  
"I think maybe you should think about what you want from your life. There's a lot of things we can do..."  
"I don't want his money! I didn't do any of this for the money. I thought I was doing the right thing... I thought that speaking out I could change things, even if it was just for one person, you know. Now it feels like... feels like he still owns me. You should take Viren to the park or something. I'm not really good company right now"  
"I'm not leaving when you're upset like this"  
"Then I'm going to take a shower... I feel sick"  
Well that went well. Climbing across the bed, Eren put as much distance between them as possible. Levi left with his arms filled with Viren and the feeling that the next few days were going to be a total shitfest. Nick didn't own any part of Eren. The money was gifted to him, because the judge believed Eren could do something really special with it... like a shelter. It might have been an off handed comment, but Eren didn't know that Levi had been thinking of trying to find his omega a job in that field of work. He was jobless, and overqualified to be so. Hanji was talking about quitting and spending more quality time with Anna, before the birth of her second child... To Levi, it really wasn't that stupid of an idea.

 

*  
Trying to find a rhythm between them seemed harder than Eren thought it would be. With the trial over, he just wanted things to go back to being normal. After having such a messed up life, he found comfort in having a routine and creating tasks for himself to complete. He knew he was avoiding the real issue of what to do with the money forced upon him, but until he could figure out just what came next for him, he wanted to go about setting a routine he could easily accomplish. Only. Levi was ruining all his plans without even knowing it. Even the twins, who were a handful now that Eli had started crying just as much as Rei, weren't annoying him as much as his husband did. When Levi was working, Eren prided himself on keeping the apartment clean. He prided himself on making breakfast, lunch and dinner, for his husband, no matter what time his shift ended. This had all gone to shit with his pregnancy, and as much as he desperately wanted to reclaim it, Levi was always there. He'd get up for the morning feeds, then go about making breakfast once the twins were fed. That should have been a simple task, yet it was like Levi had a superpower and that superpower was waking up just as he started, then shooing him out of the kitchen so he could take over. After breakfast came the dishes and clean up, which Levi would do. At lunch, Levi would insist on making it... then dinner. When Rei had started running low on formula, Eren had offered his pup his breast, only for the pup not to take it. Given it was still early, and only he and Viren were awake, he'd intended to take the toddler for a walk down to the local pharmacy. It was only a 10minute walk, yet, Levi magically appeared from the bedroom as Eren was about to slide his shoes on. Explaining that Rei needed formula, Levi took his shoes from his hand, kissed him on the top of the head and promised he'd go... because "he knew the right one to get". He knew how to feed his son. He'd taken a photo of the tin, and had fully intended to ask one of the staff, if it wasn't in stock. The same thing happened a few days later when they needed nappies. Levi happily taking Viren for a walk, while Eren was left home with the twins. Even when it came to things like pads, or nursing pads, off Levi would go. If he tried making something for lunch or a snack while Levi was gone, his husband would scold him gently about how he should be resting. Levi was doing everything around the apartment, and it was driving him insane. If he went and took a nap, his husband would ask what was wrong. If he went and took a bath, Levi would check on him if he felt like he'd been in there too long. He knew Levi liked to keep busy, and while he'd appreciated how much his husband had done for him, and how he'd gotten him through his pregnancy, this was exactly why he felt Levi needed a job. Keeping his mouth closed about it, he finally broke and called Krista, booking himself an appointment without telling Levi about it. He'd used his phone to map the route out to clinic via public transport... he'd then triple checked it carefully. He'd have to swap buses and walk, but he was honestly looking forward to it.

Having made the appointment in the morning, Eren crept carefully around the house. The shower he'd had, could barely have been called a shower. He was too scared that if he turned it properly, Levi would wake up. Feeding both pups, he cleaned them up and dressed them for the day, before laying them both down in Eli's crib. The pair loved sleeping together, and Eren loved watching them sleeping together. Creeping out the nursery, he thought he was home free. He was dressed, shoes on, backpack organised, Titan was happily eating his wet food on the counter, while Levi and Viren slept... only, Viren came stumbling out his room dragging his blanket. Rushing to gather his crying his son up, the toddler wrapped his arms around his neck as he started to cry... summoning Levi. Blinking at the sight, Eren hated the confusion on Levi's face   
"He had a nightmare"  
"Why aren't you in bed? Are you dressed?"  
"Oh. Yeah. I have an appointment with Krista in about an hour..."  
"You do? You didn't tell me about it"  
"I thought I'd be back in time..."  
"Give me a sec, I'll get ready"  
"No"  
"What?"  
"No. I don't need a lift"  
"Eren, you shouldn't be walking around town. You've just recovered from..."  
Walking over to them, Levi lifted Viren out his arms  
"Recovered from what? I gave birth in April. It's nearly July. I'm recovered"  
"You're still..."  
"I'm still what? Sick in the head? Yeah. I am. That's why I made myself an appointment"  
"I didn't say that. Don't put words in my mouth"  
"No. You didn't need to say it"  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"It means I have nothing to do anymore, Levi. It means "I don't even know why I'm here, other than to take care of the kids"  
"Eren..."  
In Levi's arms, Viren was looking at him like he was the worst mother in the world. His son had even gone back to everything being "daddy". He wasn't allowed to be there for his son's nightmares, or the times he tripped. Whatever he drew, it was for Levi. Bath times and bedtime stories were "daddy", and "no mummy". He didn't know what he'd done to make him fall out of love with him again, but he was just so exhausted. He needed help and he'd made an appointment... now he was stuffing everything up  
"Look. I'm sorry. I need to go"  
"Eren..."  
"Just take care of Viren..."

 

Fleeing the apartment, he slipped his headphones into his ears. He might have been lying to himself to build up his courage, but he really did need to get out of the apartment. And by heading to see Krista, he already knew the destination. He knew what was waiting for him, and that Krista would listen. He knew the area, and where the bus stop was in relation to her office. He might not know the bus stop where he needed to switch over very well, but he had his headphones and his phone... as well as the thick hoodie he was half hidden in.

His nerves and anxieties gave him no relief, but once he'd made it to Krista's office, he was quietly proud of himself. Pulling out his headphones, he stuffed them in the pocket of his hoodie, as he entered the waiting room. Krista's secretary looked up to give him a smile, before frowning. Eren's heart deciding to do a stupid flip in fear  
"No kids today?"  
Oh... that was all...  
"No. They're at home with Levi"  
"Aww. I've been looking forward to meeting the two new little ones"  
"I've got photos"  
"I'll take it! It's been so long since I saw you. How've you been?"  
He liked Krista's secretary. At first it was strictly professionally, but as time went by, she'd made the effort to be polite, and he appreciated that  
"Yeah. All over the place..."  
Shooting her a smile, the woman nodded  
"I can't imagine. Three little pups under 4... you're much stronger than I am"  
Walking over to the desk, he pulled his phone from his pocket, frowning at the new message from Hanji saying she'd pick him up from his appointment   
"Is everything ok?"  
"Oh. Sure. Hang on, I'll find those photos. Viren isn't sure what to think of being a big brother. He doesn't like that cry, and that they're too small to play games with"  
"Aw, bless him. I'm sure he'll settle down. Didn't you also have a cat? How does he like them?"  
"It's funny, with Viren, Titan didn't want anything to do with him. But with the twins, he's always trying to get into their cots. He was actually grooming Rei the other day"  
"Cats are complicated creatures"  
"I don't think I'll ever understand them... here we go. Rei's the one slightly smaller than Eli"  
Handing his phone over, he chose the photo of the pair of them holding hands  
"Oooh. Oh, they're adorable"  
"That was when Rei finally came home. They're inseparable now. They both sleep better when they're next to each other"  
"Someone's a proud mum"  
"Yeah... yeah. I can't deny that"

Spending the time before his appointment talking about the kids really helped. It was a nice distraction, though it didn't drive away the thoughts of the fight he'd had with Levi, it did help calm his anxieties back down... until Krista came out and called him in.

Sitting in the corner like he usually did, Krista sat across from him  
"Let me guess. You had a fight with Levi"  
Eren's lips twitched, the sides turning slightly upwards  
"Am I that transparent?"  
"Just a little. Do you want to start with that?"  
"No. Yes. Ugh... Is it possible to love someone, and want to punch them in the face at the same time?"  
"Yes... but it all depends on what he did"  
"I... you know how things weren't going great towards the end of last year? Well, now it's the opposite and we had a fight about it"  
"Levi's being too caring?"  
He could hear the laughter in her tone  
"I get that I had a lot of downs during the pregnancy, but he's suffocating me. I can't do anything at home"  
"What do you mean?"  
"Levi does it all. I'm sure if he could breast feed the pups, he'd be doing that too"  
"Have you talked to him about it?"  
"No. I know I should, but... he... it's not like he's doing it to be cruel. He's just not used to sitting still"  
"So you're upset because your husband is pampering you, and doing everything for you"  
Eren groaned  
"It's pathetic. I know it's pathetic, but I used to love taking care of the apartment. You know? Like, it made me proud to have everything done and organised, now I'm not even allowed to go buy formula, because I'm supposed to be resting"  
"Not many alphas would do that"  
"I know. That's what makes it so hard. We both know I'm a basket case, but with the pups and the trial, I need to get back into a routine. I need to keep busy so I don't have to think, and all I have are these thoughts and I'm sick of them"  
"What kind of thoughts?"  
"Why am I here? What am I supposed to do? Why am I still with Levi, if I'm not contributing anything? And I... I've started scratching again. If I catch myself, I can stop it. But when I'm sleeping, or distracted... I don't want to be like that"  
"Ok. So. Let's break this down. How do you feel about having both boys home?"  
"Terrified. Scared. Happy. Scared... I mean. It's a miracle that Rei survived. And I know that Levi is still shaken over the fact I technically died, but he's been getting worse, rather than better as time passes. He wanted to drive me today, like that wouldn't mean getting the twins up and into the car, and getting Viren moving..."  
"You're talking about Levi again. I want to know what you think"  
"I... I'm scared. I'm honestly scared. They're both so tiny. I feel like I have to watch them all the time or I'm going to lose them. I... it's harder than I thought it would be... some nights I can't sleep"  
"What keeps you up?"  
"I don't want them to die... I feel like I failed both of them and each time I look at them, I feel... guilty for what they went through..."  
"You're not to blame"  
"I was the one carrying them. I keep feeling like I'm a terrible mum, because even though they were supposed to be twins, they're not"  
"That was for medical reasons"  
"I know, but I still keep thinking they'd be better off I wasn't around"  
"Not around, or, not around?"  
"I... the second one"  
Drawing his knees up, Eren dug the heels of his palms into eyes   
"I don't want to die, but I don't not want to either. I'm so tired of it. I thought once the trial passed, that things might get better, but I'm not. I'm hiding from Levi. He's pushing himself so hard for me... but I can't tell him. I can't tell him how bad I feel because I know he's going to be too nice about it. I don't want to leave my kids, but I can't do anything for them. I feel so sick and dirty. Nick reminded me of who I really am, and I hate that person. I thought I was strong for standing up to him. Then the court gives me all this money and I feel like I've been fucked and paid for my services..."  
"You didn't see me, but I was there. I think his ruling was fair"  
"I don't! It's like Nick still owns me... I have his money. I don't want his money"  
"Have you thought about what to do with it?"  
"I can't talk to Levi about it. He doesn't get it. He thinks I want to buy a house or a car, or something physical with it. I don't want it. I hate what Nick did and I feel like I'm profiting from it"  
"Then, why don't you donate it?"  
"How do I know it's safe to do that? How do I know it's going to help omegas? He did so many bad things. So many things that can't be forgiven"  
"That was him. The judge gave you that money because you're an omega. You know what omegas need"  
"I'm a failure of an omega... I couldn't even have proper pregnancies. My heats are wrong. I'm too tall. It took an alpha to teach me how to nest. It took Levi to teach me how to read and write properly..."  
"See. You know what's wrong with the system. The fact you can even think about such things shows you've seen all the wrong sides of it. How would you show someone in your position that they're going to be ok?"  
"I don't know"  
"Yes you do. What did Levi do that no one else has?"  
"He... he took me in. He... told me it was my body. He was the one who taught me that"  
"How many omegas out there, do you think feel like they don't own their own bodies?"  
"A lot"  
"Too many?"  
Eren sniffled and nodded  
"And how many do you think fall through the gaps when it comes to shelters?"  
"Way too many... shelters aren't safe..."  
"I think what the judge was trying to tell you was that you're passionate about omega rights. If something isn't right, you speak up"  
"I can only do that because Levi's there"  
"That's not true. You told me how you stood up for the dancers at the clubs"  
"Because no one else would"  
"Exactly. You see someone who's hurt and you want to make it better. You see what's wrong with the world, and you see what's right. If you find something or someone working with omegas to make their lives better, why not donate the money to them?"  
"But what if they turn out like Nick?"  
"Not everyone you meet will be like him. Don't rush into anything, but also don't feel like you owe Nick a single thing... because of him you lost so much, Eren. Don't let him take any more from you"  
"I don't think I have anything left to give"  
"You have plenty. You've birthed three amazing boys, you've married Levi, you have a safe place to call home. You're allowed to be happy"  
"I don't feel very happy. I'm so sick of it, Krista. I'm sick of being told to rest. I'm sick of Levi doing everything around the apartment. I'm sick of me. I hate how I look. I hate how I feel. I hate hiding my panic attacks and tears from him... the only moments I get any real peace is when it's the twins early morning feeds. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of crying in front of my babies"  
"Have you been to see your doctor?"  
"No... I couldn't get an appointment, and if I did, Levi would insist he comes with me. I know I should go back on the stupid pills, but I don't want them in the house... it's... it's too tempting"  
Krista let out a soft sigh, rising from her chair, she came and sat beside him  
"You know what I'm going to say"  
"That I have to talk to Levi"  
"Yeah. I really think you should. Especially if you're feeling this low"  
Because it was just that easy, finding his hand starting to inch towards the other one with the need to scratch, he moved his arm up to rest on the arm of the sofa  
"I... Krista, he looked so hurt because I scratched at the trial. I'm sick of disappointing him"  
"Are you sure it was disappointment?"  
"What do you mean?"  
"There's a difference between disappointment and worry. He cares very deeply for you"  
"I know that. That's why I can't tell him... I love him too much to"  
"Eren, if Levi was feeling as you do, would you want to know?"  
"Yes"  
"Why?"  
Why, what? His reply tapering off into a question. He really didn't know what Krista expected him to say, other than the obvious   
"So I could support him?"  
"Exactly. I know things haven't been easy for you both, but I really think you need to talk. I could have him come here if that's easier. Wait. You have the twins now. I don't mind coming to talk to you both"  
"Krista, I couldn't ask you do that for me... You're supposed to be my therapist, but somehow you've ended up being one of my closest friends... I don't want to inconvenience you"  
"It's not an inconvenience. And maybe I'm really a wicked, selfish girl? Hmm... have you ever considered that I may want to meet Rei and Eli properly? See, I'm terrible"  
Eren let out a small laugh  
"Yes, you're completely wicked..."  
"Aren't I just? And don't think I don't know you've been showing other people baby photos"  
"I can't help it. They're so tiny... I still can't believe they're here. If everything had gone right, I would have only just given birth last month"  
The tiny spark of a joking mood was snuffed out with his own comment...  
"Eren, you can't blame yourself for that. It was in Rei's best interest that he was birthed sooner rather than later. I know you know that"  
"I do... but it's hard, Krista. They were twins, and now they're... not. They started their lives together, but they have different birthdays. I feel like I deprived them of that bond"  
"When they're old enough, you'll explain it to them and they'll understand"  
"And what if they don't? Then what do I do?"  
"You live with the knowledge that you went above and beyond what a normal person would do, so that your sons would have a chance to have each other. You've always been too hard on yourself"  
"I still don't feel better about it"  
"I know. And I can't imagine how it is to be a parent, but you love your boys, even the big kid. He loves you too, and you two really need to talk about this"  
"I feel like... if I tell him, he's only going to blame himself. I don't want to hurt him, not when he's trying to take care of me"  
"You said he'd gotten worse?"  
"Oh... yeah. Like, when I was pregnant, we went through a lot and I wasn't allowed to do things in case it brought on labour. But... it's like... he's trying to take everything on and I'm afraid it's going to burn him out"  
"Then tell him that"  
"He'd tell me not to worry. Because he's an alpha and all that... he treats me so good, Krista. He treats me like a person, and even calls me his equal... but I don't feel very equal at the moment"  
Krista hummed  
"I have an idea"  
"What?"  
"Why don't you draw up a table? You can divide jobs"  
"He'd ignore it"  
"Not if it's doctor's orders. We can draw it up now, and you can show him when you talk to him. I agree with you, I think you need to be up and doing things. Humans aren't made to be sitting still. Getting up and moving releases endorphins"  
"I can't even take the kids to the park or anything... the twins are too young, and when I want to take Viren for a walk, Levi insists he can just drive us. I've had him Viren out on outings, but he gets upset? when he comes home and finds I've done something... I've gone from feeling like he doesn't love or want me anymore, to feeling like everything I try to do isn't good enough, because he insists on doing it. It makes me start doubting that anything I've ever done has been good enough... it's exhausting. I can't even go stay with Hanji to have a break, because ever since the trial, I've been really sensitive to scents, and the pups are too small... I don't want to take them away from Levi"  
"Do you know what triggered the scent issue? And what happens? Do you panic?"  
"I... Yeah. It was on the day of sentencing. Levi sat me in the corner and I started feeling claustrophobic, then Mike and Erwin sat behind us... I felt like I was boxed in... actually... no. It was before then... when Eli came home. I started feeling really scared... and it's just gone from there. I'm not ok, Krista"  
"And that's a huge step. You're not denying it, and you're actively seeking help. That's huge and you should be proud of yourself"  
"I don't feel too proud"  
"Well I'll be proud of you, for you. Though I don't like that you feel this low..."  
"I don't like it either... it's exhausting"  
"Have you been sleeping?"  
"Not through the night. Just an hour or two at a time"  
"Can Levi watch the twins so you can get some real sleep. It's really going to help your mood"  
"I prefer if he sleeps. Viren has been demanding all of Levi's attention lately, so it's better if he sleeps. Three year olds have so much energy"  
"You know what I'm going to say"  
"That I need to take care of myself"  
"Yes. Because you do. I'm going to make an appointment with Levi too, and I'll stop in to see you both later"  
"Krista, you really don't need to do that"  
Krista winked at him  
"I'm selfish remember"  
"I think you're the least selfish person I know"  
"I'll take the compliment... but only if you show me those photos... I think you need a break from thinking"  
"I think I do to"

 

*  
Cleaning the apartment around Viren, Levi wanted everything to be perfect for when Eren came home. He had no idea what was up with his husband, but he'd spent the whole time his mate was gone, trying to figure it out. He'd even messaged Hanji to see if she knew, which she didn't. And all he got was questions about what Eren had decided to spend his new fortune on. Levi was still really hung up on the shelter idea. He hadn't told Eren, but he'd been looking at property listings online. He'd found one place that would be ideal, but even with Eren's money, it would still take a lot of work to bring it up to scratch. Maybe it was naive of him, but he was carefully planning out everything. Hanji wanted to quit, but she was qualified to practice as a GP. If she ran a small clinic out the building, then they'd have both a doctor on staff, and they'd be able to offset costs. Nanaba was trained as a medical receptionist, and even if she couldn't join them, she'd be able to give them some direction in the way of being a receptionist. Mike could share a practice with Hanji, or be their facilitator between the hospital and the shelter... Eren would know what omegas needed. He'd know how to empower them best. His husband could help in every single aspect of being an omega. From choosing the decor, to letting Levi or Hanji know what each omega needed. Hell. Eren even had practice helping with births. They could work with Krista on the mental health side of things... Hell. He'd even thought maybe Sasha could help with dance classes to help get omegas more comfortable and confident with their bodies... or for rehabilitation. He knew it was all just a dream, but he also knew how much it would mean to Eren. As for himself, he didn't know what he could contribute. He had a hatred of paperwork, yet, he didn't think he could trust anyone else with this, and with Nick's case still fresh in everyone's mind, he could probably see about government grants to offset costs. After all, they were pretty red faced over their own failures coming to light... So, he might have put a bit too much thought into it... but he'd seen abused omegas. His own husband had been abused and he'd seen that not all omegas were happy to accept that kind of treatment. But all of this depended on Eren, he wouldn't take any of this further without talking to his husband about it.

When Eren finally came home, his mate looked tired. Dropping his house keys in the bowl, Levi didn't expect it when his husband walked over to him and dropped down in his lap. He'd thought he was in the shit, with the omega. Wrapping his arms loosely around his husband, he forced himself to bite his tongue. Eren had initiated things, so that had to mean Eren wanted to talk. Letting out a long breath, Eren dropped his head onto Levi's shoulder  
"We need to talk"  
That was never a good way to start a conversation  
"I don't appreciate you bringing Hanji into private things like this"  
Oh. He was in the shit with his husband   
"What happens between us, needs to stay between us. Or I can't trust you"  
Levi again held his tongue. Eren had just been to see Krista, and while she was his therapist and he wanted his husband to be able to talk to her... Krista wasn't him  
"I didn't appreciate her spending the drive telling me how I'd upset you, without her listening to what I had to say. Krista will be coming over tonight, so I need to talk to before she does"  
Krista was coming over? Why? Cautiously, he replied   
"Ok..."  
Climbing out his hold, Eren sat down on the coffee table. Pulling his backpack off, his husband rifled around in it, finally pulling out a piece of paper folded in half  
"I need you to take a look at this"  
Handing it over, Levi unfolded it  
"What is this?"  
"You're doing too much around the house and I'm not ok with it"  
Folding the paper back up, Levi placed it down next to him. A frown on his face as he did  
"I'm your husband. Of course I'm going to..."  
"You didn't even look at it"  
"Because I don't mind..."  
"Well I do. Ok. You're making me feel useless. This is why I had to go see Krista. You're making me feel useless, Levi. You don't even let me go down to the shops, or do anything around the house. I know you're doing it because you love me, that's why I've been trying not to say anything, but it's not ok"  
He wasn't trying to make Eren feel useless... his husband had been through so much, so he wanted to ease the burden on his shoulders  
"You're still..."  
Eren cut him off with a hurt glare  
"I'm recovered physically. I'm not recovering mentally. I'm going backwards. Today, Krista asked me about going back on my pills. I told her no because it's too tempting. Do you understand what I mean by that?"  
Pills.. No. He didn't... All he wanted was for Eren to relax and rest... When he didn't reply, Eren sighed heavily  
"I've been thinking some pretty fucked up things. About how things wouldn't change if I was no longer here..."  
Suicide. The answer hit him like a ton of bricks. His hurt showing on his face   
"This is why I didn't want to tell you. Because I know you're only doing everything because you care. But I feel completely useless... I feel like if I was gone, nothing around here would change. Viren has reconnected with you. Rei is on the bottle, and Eli would probably take a bottle without thinking twice. So I went and I talked to Krista. That piece of paper, you ignored, is a jobs list. Everything around the apartment that needs to be done, broken into turns, because if something doesn't change, I'm going to break. I used to be proud of keeping the apartment clean. I used to be proud to make you meals. Now I feel like none of that meant anything to you, because you don't let me do anything. Do you understand what I'm saying?"  
"I... Eren. I never meant to..."  
He hadn't. He'd thought Eren's falling mood was his depression, not because he was making his husband feel worthless. He'd wanted Eren to be happy. To relax and spend time doing more things for himself   
"I know you didn't. And I know what happened with my pregnancy scared you. But I've gone back to scratching. I'm hiding showering or doing anything, in case you wake up and tell me to rest. I'm hiding my panic attacks and I never wanted to hurt you, but this isn't working. I'm going to take a proper shower and I want you to take a look at the list. You keep saying I'm your equal, and I know you're still shaken and hurting, but if you're going to be home all the time, we need to work as a team. This was what Krista and I came up with as a starting point..."  
Climbing off the table, Eren headed into their bedroom to ditch his backpack, before heading into the bathroom. Left on the sofa, Levi didn't know what to say. He really hadn't meant to make Eren seem unvalued... and not to the point of... Picking up the piece of paper, he unfolded it again. This time taking the time to read it properly. It was simple enough. The times Eren cooked, Levi did the dishes and vice versa. If Eren put the washing on, Levi moved it to the dryer. If Eren swept, Levi mopped. Eren did the night feeds, if both pups were hungry, then Levi was in charge of making Rei a bottle. His husband had broken everything down, though he did notice that Eren had listed himself as feeding Titan everyday. He'd known quitting work would be a huge adjustment for them both, he just hadn't realised that it would ruin their marriage. He'd hated everything Eren went through with his pregnancy, and he wouldn't wish that on anyone else, but he'd enjoyed when Eren would let him take care of him... and not just sexually. It made him feel wanted and needed. It felt good to take care of Eren, and to be what his husband needed. 

Dragging himself off the sofa, Levi headed into the kitchen to pin the new chores roster on the fridge. He didn't know what else to do with it... he hadn't meant to hurt Eren. Or to sick Hanji onto him. He'd sent her to pick him up because... he couldn't truthfully say it was because therapy took a lot out of Eren. He'd sent her, because of their little fight... not that he'd actually sent her. He'd told her and she'd offered. He just hadn't said no... No... no. He'd been mad at Eren... so maybe he had let Hanji go, because he knew she'd get under his skin. He was trying his hardest... but that was wrong. But if that was wrong, what was the right thing to do?

Waiting until Eren came out the shower, Levi followed him into their bedroom. Eren ignoring him as he pulled out a fresh set of sweats and shirt  
"I read the roster. If this is what you want, we can try to make it work"  
Eren sighed deeply  
"It's not about what I want. It's about what I need, and I need you to give me some space"  
"Space?"  
"Yes. Space. I love you, but I need this. I'm going to take a nap"  
"I thought you wanted to talk"  
"We did"  
"No, we didn't"  
"I told you what I needed, now I need you to understand"  
"I do understand"  
"No. You don't"  
"Eren..."  
"Look, I'm not trying to pick a fight"  
"You didn't even let me say anything"  
"Because I said what I needed"  
"You tell me that I'm making you want to kill yourself, and then left to have a shower. We need to talk about this"  
"I'm not going to... I was just... thinking about it"  
"That's bad enough. I was only trying to be there for you. Your pregnancy wasn't easy, and you suffered so much. I wanted to take care of you"  
Eren replied flatly  
"By doing everything"  
It was a statement. Or maybe even an accusation. His alpha taking offence, as Levi crossed his arms   
"I wanted to make things easier for you"  
"By making me feel useless"  
"Dammit, Eren. You said you understood that me..."  
"See. This is why I didn't want to tell you, but Krista said to"  
"So what? I was supposed to come home to you bleeding out in the bathtub, because you couldn't even be honest with me"  
"What? No"  
"Really, because that's how it sounds to me. I was trying to show you... how much you meant to me. I was trying to show you how much I love you, by making sure you had time to rest and time to yourself"  
"And what about you?"  
"This isn't about me?"  
Eren scoffed   
"This whole thing is about you. And your ridiculous need to show off how strong of an alpha you are"  
"That isn't it at all and you know it. You died Eren"  
"I know I did!"  
"Then why can't you understand how I feel?! You were gone, because I got you pregnant..."  
"So what? It's some how your fault that I died and came back?! Oh, please. I made the choice"  
"A choice that got you killed?! How many times have you been hurt?! You lecture me about my pride, but it's perfectly fine for you to get hurt. To keep things from me. I'm your husband"  
"It's because you're my husband! I've never had a life this good! I've got three amazing sons, a stable home and you. I don't want to lose it!"  
"Then talk to me! If you can't talk to me, what kind of a relationship do you call that?!"  
"I... I want to protect you. From me... I don't want you to ever be hurt!"  
"I'm hurt because you can't trust me"  
"I do!"  
"Then why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell me any of this? Why couldn't you sit down and say "look, I'm not ok"?"  
"Because I love you! I love you, Levi! You're trying your fucking hardest for me, but it's not what I need. Is that what you wanted to hear? Last year I thought we were over. Now you're smothering me. I told you. I told you there's times I need space! Well this, I can't have my own space anymore, so I need this!"  
"You can't have your own space because you won't move out the apartment. You wouldn't even let me marry you, until you were scared enough to finally just give in. Did you want to marry me?"  
"I fucking proposed to you"  
"Yeah. Then you told me over and over you wanted to, but when I'm finally interested, you say no"  
"Finally interested? Oh. Thanks"  
"That's not how I meant it"  
"No. No. Go ahead. Tell me how wrong I am. Tell me how my panic attacks are stupid. Tell me how being scared that I'm going to end up tied up again is stupid"  
Why wasn't Eren listening to him? He wanted a future with him... a real life with his husband. Not that they didn't have an amazing thing going on here, but he wanted more. He might have been selfish, but he did. He wanted Eren to have everything that he'd missed out on. That they'd both missed out on. A loving and safe home, where their children only had happy memories... He'd kept the apartment for Eren's sake, and would continue to keep the apartment, but they had options now. They could keep the apartment and buy a house... even if they bought a house, he'd intended to keep the apartment to secure the loan. There he was. Making sand castles, while Eren was only interested in the shells on the beach  
"It is! Because you should know by now, I would never do that to you! God! This whole fight is because I want to protect you. I want to keep you safe. You throw yourself headfirst into everything... like... a suicidal blockhead! You're my husband! And I fucking love you, but this apartment is too fucking small! They're just walls, Eren. You taught me home, and family was people, not the house or apartment! Do you really have to be here, to be happy? Don't you want a yard for the kids? Or at least a space where we aren't on top of each other. It doesn't need to be a house! You have money..."  
"I don't want his money! Do you have any idea how much I hate having his money!? Having money that came from what he and my father did. It's revolting"  
"Its money... it was given to you, so you could have a better life"  
"I was fine with my life! I was fine! I had the man I loved by my side... and three kids and a place to feel safe! I had everything I needed. If you want the money so fucking badly, then you keep it! Do whatever you want with it!"  
"Well someone has to think about the future!"

"Daddy?"  
Dragging his blanket and his teddy, Viren had tears in his eyes as he wandered into their room. Rushing over to him, Eren knelt down, cupping Viren's hands in his face as he kissed the toddler's forehead  
"It's ok, baby. Did you have a bad dream?"  
"Why were you yelling at daddy?"  
Eren shook his head quickly  
"We were playing"  
... And Viren wasn't convinced   
"I don't like it when you're mean to daddy"  
And once again Eren was trying to take the brunt of everything alone   
"Viren..."  
"You're right. Mummy is sorry, baby boy"  
"Actually. Mummy is wrong. Daddy was the one angry at mummy"  
"But mummy is the one who made daddy angry. Here, do you want to go back to sleep? Or do you want to watch 'toons with daddy while mummy sleeps?"  
"'toons"  
"Ok, baby"  
"Eren, we aren't done talking"  
"Really? I thought we were, Levi. Your son is upset"  
He wasn't fucking done. He was sick of Eren taking the blame for everything, all the time. He was sick of his husband thinking it was ok for Viren to be mad at him, and thinking it was ok that Viren didn't respect him  
"Viren, go wait in the living room"  
"Dad?"  
"Levi..."  
"Viren, your mother and I need to talk. Go watch your cartoons and I will be there soon"  
He knew the toddler knew how to work the TV remote. He'd caught him out of bed more than once, watching TV at all kinds of hours in which he should have been sleeping   
"Levi, he's three"  
"He's three and a half. He knows how to work the TV"  
Lifting Viren, Eren glared at him  
"You have no right being mad at him. You're taking your anger out on him"  
"I am not taking anything out on him. We need to talk about this"  
"It's fine. You've read the roster..."  
"It's not fine. I'm tired of this"  
"I'm sorry you're tired of hiding our disagreements from your son..."  
"That's not what I was saying. I'm sick of you letting him disrespect you"  
"He wants his father. He loves you, and he adores you. It's nice to know you don't see it the same way"  
The scent rolling off Eren was anger and disgust. Eren continuing to steamroll his way ahead with his own conclusions   
"I love my son. But I also love my husband, and you accepting this, isn't not ok. I'm sick of it. You should know better than that by now"  
"So I shouldn't be concerned with what my son wants? Or care about his happiness?"  
"Not when it's making you miserable"  
"It's not making me miserable. I get it. You're the better parent. All I've done is drag him in and out of hospital, and give him two brothers he didn't ask for"  
"Eren"  
"He loves you, Levi"  
"And I love you, but that isn't ok. Everything I've been trying to do for you, has only made you want to disappear. Obviously I'm not the man Viren thinks I am"  
"You're everything he needs you to be. And this. This right here is why I couldn't tell you anything. I didn't want to start a fight. I just wanted to be allowed to do more around the apartment"  
"No one is stopping you"  
"You literally do. Every single time I'm in the middle of something, you send me away. Ever time. You get mad if I do anything while you're out"  
"I don't get mad"  
"No. You're right. You get disappointed, then give me a look that makes me wish you'd hit me instead"  
Levi's top lip rose in anger   
"I'd never hit you"  
"I know you wouldn't. I know, ok. But my head is a forking mess. You used to understand. You used to say you did. You used to tell me that anxieties weren't logical, and that it was ok, because I was making the effort. Now I'm trying to make the effort again, and you're making me wish I never opened my mouth"  
"Don't turn this back on me. I want to talk about it, but you want to hide in bed!"  
Viren burst into tears, Levi taking a shaky breath as he ran his fingers through his hair  
"Are you happy now?"  
No. He wasn't fucking happy. He didn't enjoy making his son cry. Nor did he enjoy upsetting and angering Eren. But now he'd gone and done both... maybe he needed to take a breath and take a step back. His alpha wasn't impressed at all. Eren had climbed into his lap, dropped a bombshell, then walked off like it was nothing. It wasn't his fault he needed to talk this out to understand why Eren was saying all this shit  
"You know what. Take a nap. I'll take Viren, and I'll look after the twins"  
Walking over, Levi took Viren from Eren. His husband glaring at him as he did. Seriously. He didn't get how all this had happened. He'd only been trying to take care of his family. He didn't deserve this... hostility. If Eren hadn't come at him so forcefully, they could have talked like two rational adults.

 

*  
Eren was still in bed when Krista arrived. Eli had woken for a feed, so both twins were in with him, while Viren was demanding all his attention. Interrupting Viren telling him all about the show they were watching, his son wasn't too pleased when Krista knocked on the door. Not that Levi was particularly happy either. It meant another confrontation with Eren. Krista, however, was all smiles  
"Levi. How wonderful to see you again. I'm sorry for intruding, so I hope Eren told you I was coming"  
"He did, right before we got into a fight"  
Krista sighed softly, closing the door behind her as she gave Viren a small wave   
"I'm sorry. That really was not my intention at all"  
"No. No. It's good he can talk to you, but I do wish he'd talked to me"  
"You've both been through a lot, and I've actually booked you an appointment to come see me. Eren may have been the one to carry the pups and go through the trial, but you're the one who was there supporting him"   
"And apparently I'm also the one driving him to hurt himself"  
"Levi. No. How much did you talk about? Maybe we should take a seat at the dining table? Is Eren resting?"  
"Yeah. He's in our room with the twins. It's nearly time to be getting Viren ready for bed, you interrupted his cartoons..."  
"Oh no! Not the cartoons. Viren, what are you watching?"  
"'toons!"  
Replying to Krista, almost all was forgiven as he was getting attention  
"I love cartoons, too. I'm going to have a little talk with your daddy, is that ok?"  
Viren frowned at her, Krista snorting out a laugh  
"I take that as a no"  
"It's fine. He'll get over it. Do you want a tea or coffee?"  
"No, Ymir has everything organised at home"  
"We're not..."  
"No. No. No. I told her I was stopping by here on the way. I was hoping to talk to you both about what's happening here, and about the new roster list"  
Moving to the dining table, Levi dropped down into his usual seat, Krista sitting in what was Eren's usual seat  
"It made it to the the fridge"  
"That's a good start. Eren was really worried about talking to you about it"  
"You would think he'd know better by now"  
"Now, now. I truly think he was just trying not to upset"  
"But that's the problem, isn't it? He should be able to tell me things"  
"He took a huge step, Levi. Let's not forget that. He admitted he needed help, and made an appointment to get help"  
"But he wouldn't have needed help if I hadn't driven him to it"  
"Levi, you know better than that. You know exactly what has been happening. You didn't drive Eren to do anything. It was a combination of everything that got to him, and him attempting to distract and distance himself from his own feelings"  
Levi crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair  
"He told me I made him feel useless and he wondered why he was even still here. I'm pretty sure that's blaming me"  
"No. They are two seperate issues here"  
"It's his uselessness that was making him feel..."  
"It only worsened his depression. We talked today, him and I. About the twins, and the guilt he feels. Also about the money from Nick. It wasn't one thing, or another, but everything all at once. But above all, he told me how worried he's been about you"  
"He could have told me"  
"He didn't want to put more pressure on you. He's been worried about how much you've been doing. The chores list wasn't him having a go at you. It was him trying to find a balance between the fact he has nothing to do, and you doing too much"  
"I know. Logically I know..."  
"But your pride's been bruised"  
Levi snorted. He knew he liked Krista for a reason   
"Yeah. I mean. I was doing everything in an attempt to allow him time to rest and recover. His pregnancy was hard..."  
"On both of you. I smelt it when I walked in. Your whole apartment smells of it, and your desire to let everyone know you won't stand for anything happening to your husband"  
"I can't deny that. I feel as if I can't calm down. He's been so scared..."  
"His fear is provoking your alpha. And your scent is leaving his omega unsettled. Neither of you can rest because of it"  
"I never thought staying home full time would be this hard"  
"You have no idea the number of couples that have that same issue. After spending so much time apart, they have to relearn how to be together"  
"It... his pregnancy was hard, but when he let me in... it was great. He's a stubborn shit... maybe I was a little full of myself"  
He'd spent the whole afternoon internally angsting over his argument with Eren, and still didn't really know how he felt about it all  
"Caring for someone, and wanting to show that, isn't a bad thing. Your alpha naturally wants to provide for your omega. Any other omega would probably have been able to fully appreciate everything..."  
"Eren isn't any other omega"  
"Exactly. He's a force to be reckoned with. I think every single person at the trial learned that the hard way"  
"I was so proud of him... I know it wasn't easy, and it wasn't easy for me to hear what he'd been through. But with the trial over, I really did think his mood would lift"  
"Levi. He's dealing with giving birth. His body has been flooded with hormones, which are still settling and evening out. He feels as if Nick's money binds him to the man, and he feels useless, because he doesn't feel like he's contributing. We both know how ingrained that thought is, thanks to Zeke's disgusting training"  
"I've been with him for 5 years Krista. Zeke wasn't with him for that long"  
"No. He was there when Eren literally had nothing or no one, and he was Eren's "saviour", in a twisted way. He loves you, Levi. This is all from his anxieties being cruel"  
"I know... He's just..."

"He's just what?"  
Padding out of their bedroom, Eren had his arms full with two sleeping pups on his shoulders. Letting out a small squeal, Krista stood  
"May I?"  
"Yeah. That's why I brought them out. Rei is on my right shoulder, and Eli's on the left"  
"Oh, Eren. They are so precious"  
"Why don't you have a cuddle with Eli? He's less likely to cry, but babies are pretty easy. It's not until they get older that they get really fussy"  
Carefully Krista took Eli into her arms  
"Look at him. He looks just like you"  
"I wouldn't go that far. But yeah. Levi was the one who chose his name"  
What was that supposed to mean? Did Eren not like it?  
"Hello, little Eli. It suits him"  
"It does. I love it. Eli Abel Ackerman, and Rei Lee Ackerman, this is Krista. So. What did I do?"  
Eren did like the name, so why was he still thrown off by Eren's tone  
"Levi and I were just talking about this morning"  
"I gathered that much... though I'm curious as to what I did wrong this time"  
"You didn't do anything wrong. I was about to say "He's just been through so much. I wish I could make him see that I love him"  
"I do. I know you do. I wasn't trying to start a fight. I just want to be useful"  
"You are useful. You went through so much, you're still recovering"  
"I'm recovered physically"  
"But you're mentally exhausted!"  
"And you're not? You literally follow Viren around and clean up after him. He's a kid. They make mess. You clean when you're stressed and you haven't stopped cleaning. Your hands are chapped with contact dermatitis from cleaning. Why is it wrong that I want to do stuff too!? You make me feel like even showering requires your permission!"  
"Maybe if you'd told me..."  
"I tried to, to begin with. But you wouldn't listen, and the longer it went on, the more I knew it would hurt you"  
"Of course it would have. But I would have gotten over it"  
"I don't want to hurt you"  
"So talking about pills is your idea of not?"  
"No. That was me telling you what's been going on in my head, so you could understand"  
"That I drove you to this"  
"You didn't drive me to this! God! I need to keep busy! I need this"  
"And I need you to be ok! I don't know what else to do, to show you I care"  
"You don't have to show me! I know. Just because I'm a basket case, doesn't meant I don't know! I went to Krista because I wanted tips and ways to cope. You can't always be there to pull me out of panic attacks! As much as you want to be. Ok. And now we're getting off track. I just don't want to feel like I'm useless"  
"You're not"  
"What uses do I have? Other than as a cow or a warm body to hold? That's all I'm doing. Feeding the pups and sleeping. It's not enough for me"  
"It's not enough, or I'm not enough?"

"Guys. Hey. Levi. Eren isn't saying. Eren, Levi is only just finding out how things have been. It's all a shock. Neither of you should be bickering like this"

Eren bit his lip and looked down, Levi feeling like an arse  
"That's better. Now. Eren, what do you want to tell Levi?"  
"That I love him, but I want to do more around the apartment. I want to work as a team, and feel like I'm contributing"  
"Alright. Levi, what do you want to tell Eren"  
"That I love him, and that I didn't mean for this turn out like this. I just... I wanted him to take time for himself. With the pregnancy and the trial, it's been so much. And taking care of him... it makes me feel wanted by him"  
"Of course I want you. You're the only person I do want"  
"But you're hurting because of me. You didn't tell me what you were feeling, and it fucking sucks"  
"I didn't tell you because I love you. And I love that you want to take care of me. But I'm worried about you"  
"And I'm worried about you"  
"And both of you are entitled to worry about each other. But you're both idiots. You love each other so much, that you're both scared of hurting each other. You both fear being hated by each other. And that's the idiot bit. You love each other too much to hate each other"  
"I don't hate, Levi. I couldn't hate him... I want to be a good husband and a good mate"  
"And I want to a good husband too"  
Krista smiled widely  
"Then you both need to work together. Levi, will you give the chore roster an attempt?"  
"For Eren, yes. But I still want him to know that it hurt, that he felt he couldn't talk to me"  
"And it hurt me to feel like I couldn't. I never wanted to hurt you, Lee. I just want to be part of this family"  
God. He was so fucking weak for Eren calling him "Lee". The way Eren said it... it was always filled with love, even when Eren was mad. The one word told him that he was Eren's, as Eren was the only one to ever call him that. The name meant the world to him  
"Eren, you are this family. Stepping up and trying to fill in. I have no idea how you did it... maybe I'm trying to make up for it? I don't know. I just wanted you to have time and space for yourself"  
"And I love you, but I really do need this"  
"And I said I'd try..."  
"Excellent. And this is why I've booked your appointment next week, Levi. Now. I want you to both stick to the roster as closely as possible. And I want a list of anything that comes up... from both of you. Eren, I want you to tell Levi each time you're feeling low"  
"But..."  
"Don't "but" me. Levi isn't in your brain. And Levi, Eren isn't in yours either. You have to use these great things called words. They're a brilliant, and relatively new invention, but they've made communicating a lot easier for the masses. You two however... eeeh. There's room for improvement. Eren, you get a gold star for coming to me and admitting you're not ok. Levi, you get a gold star for trying to be everything Eren needs. You both lose them for your lack of communication. If things are better next week, I may just give you stickers"  
Eren pouted, while Krista giggled  
"Fine. I'll give you both actual stickers. But, only if you promise to communicate"  
"I'll really get a sticker?"  
"Yes, Eren"  
"Then I'll try"  
"Great. And you, Levi?"  
"I said I would"  
"I don't think he's excited over stickers, Krista"  
"Neither do I... what do I bribe him with?"  
Levi joined in on the joke, knowing Eren would be happier if he did  
"Hey. Who said I don't want a sticker. But the scratch and sniff ones were way cooler"  
Eren's jaw dropped  
"They make scratch and sniff stickers? Krista?! What is this magic?"  
Krista giggled  
"Ok. Gold stickers and, scratch and sniff stickers. Leave it with me, and I'll see what I can do. Also, I think Eli needs a nappy change. So, I'm going to pass him over to Levi, and head off. If anything comes up, give me a call. I'm rooting for both of you"  
Eren nodded  
"Thank you, Krista"  
"Yeah. Thanks, Krista. Leaving me with a dirty nappy"  
"I am a wicked person after all"  
Eren snorted, his smile wide as he nodded. An inside joke he wasn't in on. Maybe Eren would tell him later? They were talking again, right? He didn't know. It felt like things were resolved for now... but who knew if that would last?


	30. Chapter 30

Armed with a file full of printed papers, Levi was visiting Krista's office alone. Eren had been up and out of bed before him, finding feeding Eli when Levi had woken in a panic over his missing husband. With Krista's promptness, it was only a short wait before she came to fetch him. A smile on her face as he followed her down to her office, and gestured for him to sit. Sinking down, Levi let out a sigh. Krista jumping right into it as she sat  
"Let me guess. You and Eren had a fight?"  
"Maybe... Yes"  
"Both of you are so easy to read. He had the exact same look on his face when he came to see me. Was it about the roster?"  
"It wasn't my fault... I did the dishes without thinking"  
Krista laughed   
"Oh no"  
"Yeah. Pretty much"  
"And how many times has this happened?"  
"A few. I don't even realise I am until he tells me off"  
"And how is "he"?"  
"Bossy. He threw his shoe at me the other day"  
"Are you two sticking to the roster? For the most part?"  
"We're trying to. But like I said, I start something without thinking, so he gets mad"  
"And the shoe?"  
"I moved the washing to the dryer"  
An uncharacteristic pout was on Levi's lips. He really hadn't thought about it. There was washing to be done, and it was just... right there  
"No one said this would be an easy transition. It was more to get you two on the same page. Now. What have you brought me today?"  
"A few things... I... Eren and I had another fight over Nick's money. You see. There's something Eren said that hasn't left my mind, so I did some looking into it on my own"  
"Oh! What is it?"  
Passing the file of papers over to Krista, Krista opened it up in her lap  
"What am I looking at?"  
"Properties and property reports. Eren mentioned that omega shelters aren't safe for omegas, and we know how into omega rights he is. I know he hates Nick's money, but it was given to him so he could do something more with his life..."  
"You want to start a shelter?"  
Krista sounded both surprised and delighted, Levi leaning forward as he nodded  
"Not just a shelter. Hanji wants to quit from being a full time ER doctor, to spend more time with Anna before her baby comes. She's licensed to practice as a GP. What I want to establish is a new kind of shelter. A shelter where omegas are put first and treated as people. Where they can come for medical advice, without being judged. Eren is amazing with omegas, and with children. He's had no formal medical training, but he's helped deliver children. He knows what omegas need, and he knows what's wrong with society"  
"And you? You're giving me a lot of "Eren" reasons"  
"I never thought omegas were second class citizens. I dealt with omegas almost every single day, but it took Eren to make me realise so many things. The courage and bravery he showed taking the stand... He said that if it could help even just one omega, then it was all worth it"  
"Levi, you slipped back to "Eren reasons""  
It was hard not to. Eren had opened his eyes to so many things  
"I don't want my sons growing up in a world where omegas are treated like shit. I'm fucking sick of seeing omegas beaten to death by their alphas, or thinking they deserve to be beaten because they have no where to go, and their alphas are dicks. No one else has the balls to step up, and I want Eren's suffering to have been for something"  
"Setting up a shelter isn't something you can just do"  
"I know. I've been in touch with the police, and with the government. Not that they're fast at replying. The government hasn't replied, but with their own interests at heart, it's best they "help" if they want to save face"  
"You need licenses and a premise"  
"I've been looking. I've found one that needs work, but it could be perfect"  
Krista flicked through the papers. Levi may have printed off almost everything he'd come across in order to read it properly at a later date  
"Which one?"  
"The old Wall Maria Hotel. It's abandoned, and ugly as hell. The bank's been trying to offload it for years. It was repossessed, but with the downturn in economy, no one wants to put the money or effort into it"  
Krista closed the file, her smile gone  
"Levi. I think it's very admirable. But we both know this is a grand gesture of love to Eren"  
"So what if it is?"  
"These are people's lives"  
"Why can't it be both? A positive change and a project Eren can throw himself into. We were all disgusted to hear how omegas were treated. Eren used to tell me not to quit my job because he was proud of how I treated omegas. I've seen abused omegas. My husband was let down by the system that was supposed to help omegas. Do you know what he told me? He told me one of the omegas at the compound, was giving birth to the child of a shelter owner. They went there for help, and instead had to pay for their room with sex. It's fucking disgusting. How is anything going to change when this shit is happening?"  
Krista sighed heavily. Levi taken back by how strongly she was objecting, as if she thought he hadn't considered everything... or maybe she was trying to make sure he had... either way, he was thrown off balance   
"Say you do start a shelter. How are you going to pay for the building? How are you going to pay for repairs? How are you going to pay for staff? You're not on suppressants anymore. Will you go back on them to cover your alphas scent? What happens when you have omegas in heat? With alpha staff? What happens if an omega throws themselves at you in heat? How is it going to be for Eren, surrounded by omegas throwing themselves at you?"  
"That's why I want to take a step back. I want to get Eren trained to be a receptionist, so when omegas come, they're greeted by an omega. I would take a purely administrative role"  
"And what about the kids?"  
"What about them?"  
"Not all omegas are trustworthy. You'll be having strangers in and out of your home constantly. Strangers around your children"  
"That's... The hotel is only small. 4 floors with 20 rooms across the two middle floors. The man who'd purchased the building had intended to turn the whole thing into a lavish townhouse. The top floor has already been gutted... there is a basement, and that will be a problem for Eren, but it's not like it has to be that building. I want to create a future with him. An omega has never, ever, received an restitution of that much. Previously, the largest ever sum paid out to an omega was $2000. And that was because a doctor was forced to perform a hysterectomy after birth. And even then, that payment was because of their alpha. Even if Eren and I don't have an active role above establishing the safe shelter, I still firmly believe that this is what the city needs"  
"And you're not just being swept away? Eren had a tremendous victory for omegas, that much is more than true. But what happens when the dust settles?"  
"Then we kick it up again. We make it so people have to listen. Shitty pigs feeding from their troughs, aren't going to listen unless someone tips those troughs over"  
"And what about what Eren wants?"  
"He's the one who mentioned the idea of a shelter to begin with. I don't intend to start anything without him by my side"  
"And the money?"  
"Eren said he didn't want it. He told me to take it, and despite it being restituted to him, it was still paid into my account as the alpha in our relationship. This way, he's not keeping it, and nor is it going to waste"  
Krista hummed, closing the file  
"Eren and I discussed the shelter idea, as well as donation. Did he tell you that?"  
"No"  
"It was only in passing, but he didn't want it as he'd finally found his small world of happiness. I do agree. Things needs to change for omegas, and I offered Eren my support. But I can't support you until you've discussed this in length with him. As you know, I own my practice, and I can assure you that getting established took jumping through a lot of hoops. There will be days when you wonder why you even started the process to begin with. With three young children, it's going to make things so much harder, and it may take years for things to settle down. Are you prepared for that?"  
"If... if Eren is by my side, we can find a way to make it work. And it won't just be him. There's Hanji, Mike, Erwin and Eld..."  
Not that he really knew if they'd want to be involved. Hanji would. Mike possibly too. Erwin and Eren had butted heads so many times that Erwin might not listen to Eren. But... he knew he'd regret it if he didn't at least see this through far enough to present something more than a just a paper proposal to Eren. He wanted to encourage his husband's dream... He wanted a world where Eren wouldn't be treated like shit anymore. And if that meant helping other people along the way, well, it couldn't be helped. Even if his intentions were less than completely sincere, around the edges, there wasn't a person in the world who couldn't say they'd never done something to bask in the praise of others. Eren was a symbol of hope, or at least in Levi's eyes he was... and his husband had been right. He needed to keep busy  
"I'm not saying it's a bad idea. I just want you to be truly sure before starting something like this. Abused omegas need a lot of time and help, just like you know. And though not all of them have had the same kind of life as Eren, they all have their own trauma and pain. Some may even come to find a safe place to die. You may have seen more than your fair share of death, but Eren hasn't"  
"I... know. I don't expect it to be easy. I don't even know if it'll succeed. But people like Nick, are really a dime a dozen..."  
"That is unfortunately true. Alright. For now, we'll set this aside. I want to see your list, and Eren's too if you have it"

Levi was distracted by the idea of a shelter through his whole session. The more he tried to push it from his mind, the more it centred itself first and foremost. By the end of the session, he'd decided to call the realtor over the hotel. Even if he couldn't buy the hotel, it'd give him a fair idea of what to expect in terms of space and size. Hell. He'd even decided on the colour scheme for the facade... and most importantly, the name of the shelter.

 

Throwing himself into researching and budgeting, Levi found himself often going to bed as Eren was getting up for the pups midnight feed. His husband was biting his tongue again, yet Levi hadn't been able to bring himself to tell him yet. He'd thought Eren would stay quiet at least until the end of the week, but it was a fortnight after his appointment with Krista, that Eren finally got mad enough to demand some answers. Carrying Rei in his arms, Eren walked over to the sofa and dropped down in his lap. Forcing him to abandon his laptop, and pay attention to his mate  
"I'm sick of you staying up. Either you tell me what's happening, or I'm throwing it off the balcony. These late nights aren't good for you"  
"Eren..."  
"No. Don't Eren me. Start talking. I'm holding Rei hostage until you do"  
Two threats? His husband really must be mad. Sighing deeply, Levi spread his legs so Eren slipped down between them. He couldn't see over his husband's shoulder if he didn't. Eren was way too tall for Levi's own good  
"He seems pretty happy being hostage"  
Rei was wide awake, his grey green eyes blinking up at both of them  
"Lee. I'm serious. I don't know what to threaten you with, but this has been going on since the chores list went up. Is that it? Are you mad about something? I've been trying to be respectful, but both boys have their weigh in and vaccinations tomorrow, today even. You need sleep, and I'm worried about you"  
Was that today? Every day seemed to bleed together without having the set roster of work. Kissing Eren's cheek, he sighed softly  
"Sorry. I'm not mad. And I'm not mad about the chore list. Have I been that bad?"  
"You're either on your phone or on your laptop. You didn't even hear me asking if you could hold Rei while I prepared his bottle"  
"Shit. I'm sorry"  
"What's going on?"  
"I've been working on something, and, it's not quite ready yet"  
"Working on something?"  
"Yeah. I wanted to gather more information before telling you about it"  
"Can you tell me now?"  
"I can show you, if you give me a couple more days. I'm not trying to hide anything from you, I just didn't want to get your hopes up"  
"You can't tell me that, and then tell me nothing more"  
"It's nothing bad"  
"That doesn't make it better. Is it your back? Is it the bullet? Has it moved?"  
Eren's scent peaked with fear  
"Bright Eyes, I'm fine. It's not the bullet"  
"Would you tell me, if it was?"  
"Yes. I would tell you"  
Maybe not right away, but it did affect their family after all  
"Then why can't you now?"  
"Because I want to be able to explain it all in person"  
Fuck it felt nice to hold Eren. It wasn't like he didn't hold him at night, but during the day, Eren had a tendency to curl up on the recliner with Titan, leaving him the sofa with Viren  
"And you will?"  
"Yes. I have an appointment at 3 on Friday, and I want you there"  
"Tomorrow's Friday. Not tomorrow once the sun comes up tomorrow, but tomorrow"  
"I still want you there. We'll have to organise a baby sitter though"  
"Hanji owes me a favour"  
Levi raised an eyebrow, Eren leaning back in his hold   
"What's with that look?"  
"You said she owes you a favour. She owes you about a hundred"  
"That's true. No. She just owes me a favour. I don't think she's on call on Friday afternoon... I'll have to check with her"  
"And how do you know when she works?"  
"Um. I babysit. I need to know when Anna's coming"  
He couldn't remember seeing Anna in the last week or so...  
"Don't be like that"  
"I'm not being like anything"  
"You've got you scowl face on"  
Levi kissed Eren's neck, nuzzling into his omega as he drank in his scent  
"I don't. No. I was just thinking. I really didn't mean to make you think about this more than you have to"  
"It's fine... its not, but now I know it's not health related, it's better"  
"I'm sorry"  
"Well. If you're sooooo sorry, can you hold Rei for me? I need to make his bottle. Eli went right back to sleep, but Rei, nope. He still doesn't want to breast feed"  
Snorting, Levi shook his head   
"He doesn't know what he's missing"  
"Don't even joke about sex. My arse just clenched at the thought"  
"I was talking about your breasts. They're great breasts"  
"It doesn't feel that way then he won't take my nipple. Now I'm getting depressed. Here, take him. Once he's fed, I want you to come to bed. Whatever it is, it can wait for now"  
"Yes, mum"  
"Don't give me that... You make me feel bad for worrying about you"  
"I'm sorry. It's sweet that you worry, and I'm sorry for making you worry. I just hope it's going to be worth it"   
"It better be. I'm sick of you staying up all night and not knowing anything"  
"Alright. I get it. I'm coming to bed once I've fed Rei. Then you have my undivided attention"  
"I better. I miss talking to you, without 6 little ears in the room"

Despite his words, Eren was asleep when Levi climbed into their bed. Pulling his husband up to him, Eren let out a sleepy purr as he nuzzled into Levi's chest. It was nice to have a goal and dream, but he'd been doing exactly what Krista warned him about. He was throwing himself into the project and neglecting his family. He'd alienated Eren again, yet his husband still loved him. Kissing Eren's soft vanilla smelling hair, Levi wrapped his arms around his husband. Not caring at all that he'd wake with pins and needles down his arm. Eren was working so hard on doing what he felt he had to, to try and combat his depression the best he could. How could anyone not care for their omega, like he did for his? He was so very lucky to have Eren, and hopefully once Friday came, his husband would understand.

Spending that Thursday with Eren sneaking glances at him every five minutes, and two pups that didn't appreciate their immunisations, the day passed slowly. Viren was also in a bad mood, as their toddler had gotten into the pantry before covering the apartment in flour. He hadn't appreciated his bath, or being smacked on the bum for spreading even more flour after being told to stop. For the first time in a long time, Levi found himself taking a nap in the afternoon, as it was Eren's turn to make dinner. He was woken by a crying pup, finding both Eli and Rei sleeping on Eren's side of the bed. Wriggling over, he draped his arm lightly across them, kissing Rei's hair, while gently playing with Eli's. Sometimes he still couldn't believe he was a father of three, or that Eren put up with his shirt and cranky arse. If he was Eren, he would have dumped himself a long time ago. Spending sometime with his son's was soothing. Even if Rei was still grizzly. They were both so very small and so very innocent, yet growing every single day. Their tiny family wasn't so tiny anymore and despite everything, Eren was more than willing to have yet another child with him... For someone who'd had no one for so long, it was an intoxicating promise. Though, he also knew that realistically if they wanted to have another child, it would have to be sooner rather than later. He didn't want to be the 60 year old dad in the back row of his child's play... He wanted his children to be able to enjoy life, without feeling shackled to their ageing father... but Eren had his heart set on a girl... and he couldn't deny that a miniature female Eren would be adorable... until she hit puberty, then it would be terrifying. Staying with their sons, Eli was set in to fetch him when dinner was ready. Eren having outdone himself with a full roast meal, and a glass of his favourite wine. He didn't even know they had alcohol in the house, but somehow Eren had magicked it up, leaving Levi silently agreeing that he really didn't deserve him. He could only pray that the following day wouldn't end with Eren in tears, and him in the doghouse again.

 

*  
Leaving their three sons with Hanji, Eren chewed on his lip as Levi drove. According to his husband it was a short drive, but without knowing what they were heading into, Eren was a ball of nerves. He'd even cooked a huge dinner with the hopes of loosening Levi's tongue, but his husband stubbornly kept his secret.

Pulling up in a random street, Levi turned the car off. His husband climbing out, and leaving him to scramble out after. The area seemed kind of nice. It wasn't upscale, but there were a few boutiques and cafes in the area. The only problem in the street was a god ugly building, that's ageing sign declared was once a hotel. With it bordered up windows, and trash spilling down its stone stairs, it was hideous. Not to mention the puke yellow paint job  
"Levi. Why are we here?"  
"Just wait a minute. She should be here soon"  
Who was she? And why was she coming? And what the fuck was going on? He didn't get what this had to do with anything   
"Or you could tell me now?"  
Smiling, Levi took his hand and dragged him over to stand in front of the building  
"Ta-da"  
""Ta-da" what?"  
"It's a hotel"  
"Oh, no. What?"  
"I know you don't like it, but, I have an idea, and I need you use that imagination of yours"  
"You want to open a hotel? I told you I'd support you when you found something to devote your life to, but you're not exactly great with customer service..."  
"No. Not a hotel. Imagine the building repainted in a white, with blue around the window frames. Shutters on the windows, and two nice big plants either side at the top of the steps..."  
"Not a hotel?"  
"No. I know I've been busy, but I've been putting a lot of things in place. And I know this building is super ugly on the outside. In fact, I'm pretty sure we've cleaned up nappies with that same shit yellow in them, but. The previous owner, he brought it to convert it into a town house. He stripped the building of asbestos, and began to convert the top floor, before having to surrender the property to the bank when the economy went down hill..."  
Eren blinked at Levi, completely shocked by the excited words coming out his husband's mouth. He wanted to buy a fucking hotel?! But not run it as hotel... so he wanted to live in a hotel. While they might need space, a hotel was way too much space! No one needed a house as big as a hotel!  
"Levi. You better start making sense"

Digging something out of his pocket, Levi unfolded the piece of paper. A very crude sketch of what seemed to be the hotel was on the paper, along with a series of crossed out names   
"I want to turn this into a safe shelter"  
What. What now? What?  
"A what?"  
"You said you didn't want the money the judge awarded you. And we both know omega shelters aren't safe. It's not a huge building, but I was thinking, that a shelter is a good idea"  
Wrapping his arms around himself, Eren backed away from Levi, holding up a hand to keep his husband at bay  
"A shelter. You. An alpha. Wants to build a shelter for omegas"  
Levi's smile slipped  
"Not just a shelter. Hanji wants to quit working in the ER. If she opened a clinic, we could provide a safe place for omegas to get medical help. There are 10 rooms on the second and third floors. As well as space on the top floor. I've been thinking about this. There's space so that you and Sasha could have your own studio for dancing. We could offer classes to omegas to help with literacy. We could help set them up with their own bank accounts and ID. Give them somewhere warm and safe to have heats. A sort of one stop spot. I've been contacting different agencies and trying to find out the legal side of things"  
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Eren shook his head  
"Are you serious? Do you know how much work this is going to take? You can't staff it with alphas..."  
"Well, that's why I was thinking you'd work here to. You're passionate about omega rights. You know what it's like to go through hell, and you're always looking out for fellow omegas. Rather than an alpha in control of everything, you and I would be, as a partnership"  
"What about the kids?"  
"There's the whole top floor... we could move here? Or at least have the space for them while at work..."  
"Levi... this is... all way too much... how do we even know this building will work?"  
"We don't. That's why we're meeting with the realtor. They're anxious to be done with it. And I know it's going to take a lot of work. That's why I want to bring Mike, Erwin, Hanji... everyone in on it... but ultimately, I want to build something here that shows people there's still hope"  
"I... I don't know what to say"  
He really didn't. His stomach was doing flips, while his heart had settled somewhere near his toes at the thought of touching Nick's money. The judge had said to do something, and a shelter had been a day dream, but reality was now smacking him in the face with a brick, and it was way too much  
"Eren..."  
"Just. Why?"  
"Why, what?"  
"Why all of this, so suddenly..."  
"I've been thinking about this for weeks. I've been thinking about you. I hate how society treated you. It makes me sick to think of how unfair it was..."  
"So you want to turn my life into... into some money making scheme?!"  
Hissing at Levi, Eren was insulted  
"No. I want to establish a legitimate charity to help omegas. I thought you'd understand. Unlike The Church, we won't be "helping" ourselves to omegas. We'll be helping them. We'll be helping give them a voice Eren. You know how powerful that can be"  
"With a staff of alphas"  
"No. Well. Kind of. I'd be working behind the scenes. Hanji might be over enthused, but even I have to admit that her heart is in the right place. Then there's Mike. He's an alpha. When he has ever treated you with disrespect? Erwin... I don't know about. But think, Eren. We could give omegas jobs here. They could earn wages, it wouldn't be a huge wage, but it'd be money they'd be making for themselves..."  
That did kind of sound good. He knew how hard it was to get a job, even with his high school equivalency... and maybe... He knew Levi wouldn't hurt an omega intentionally, but when an omega was in heat, rationality went out the window  
"How will you deal with heats?"  
"The same way we did at home. Each room has its own lock and bathroom. We can set the system up so only you have access to the keys of omegas staying here. That way, no alpha can..."  
"Levi. You've kicked down the door to get to me before. When you're in heat, you can't think. All you want is to be fucked senseless and knotted. Now you want to run a hotel filled with omegas. I don't know how to feel, especially..."  
Eren shook his head, taking a breath as he turned away from his husband  
"Especially, what?"  
"Especially when I don't even know if you want to spend my heat with me..."  
"I... why wouldn't I?"  
"Because we haven't even talked about it since we got married. You've never spent a full heat with me, but you're happy to fill a hotel with omegas in heat"  
Tears filled his eyes at the thought of Levi in the arms of another omega... let alone multiple omegas...  
"Eren. I would love to spend a full heat with you. The only reason we didn't after Viren's birth, was because you asked me not to"  
"Because... because I can get pregnant. You could sleep with a hundred omegas Levi. You could get them all pregnant... You don't understand what a heat is like. Your ruts are hard, but a heat. No. It hurts so badly. In a full heat, you can't say no"  
Omegas could get other omegas pregnant, but the chances were so slim. And society spat on omega/omega relationships... it was an even greater insult than being an omega  
"I know that. That's why I want and need your expertise. I don't want to employ staff that will take advantage of omegas. And, Eren. You should know by now, I don't want any other omega. I've dealt with omegas in heat, and their scents are revolting. You're my husband, and even if our vows weren't traditional, I meant everything. Has this been bothering you? You thinking I wouldn't spend your heat with you?"  
Eren wiped at his face  
"Bright Eyes, please. Has it?"  
"So what if it has?"  
"Then we should talk about it. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to force you into something you'll regret"  
"You're my fucking husband. If I can't spend my heat with you, who can I?"  
Walking up behind him, Levi guided him into his arms  
"Eren. You're not spending your heat with anyone other than me. Maybe we should have talked about it earlier, but when have really had time to? Your first heat alone nearly saw you die. I almost begged you to let me spend your heats with you, but I didn't want to put that pressure on you. As for other omegas, I don't want them. I want my husband. My omega"  
Why did Levi have to be all magical with his warm touches? And why couldn't he see how it looked? A hotel full of sexy omegas in heat...  
"But..."  
"But, what?"  
"I'm not pretty any more. My stomach isn't flat. My arse and hips are huge... my skin's gross... my body is ugly"  
"You're body isn't ugly. You're not ugly. I love your stretch marks. I love your small tummy. I love your arse, and hips, and thighs. I love sucking your dick, and eating your arse. You giving birth, it hasn't changed that"  
Eren blushed. How could Levi just say that in the middle of the street?! Where anyone could be listening  
"If you would let me, I would love to spend your heat with you"  
"I don't want to fall pregnant"  
"Then we'll look into contraceptives. As long as your comfortable, that's the main thing"  
Nuzzling into his neck, Eren swore he could smell arousal on Levi. Personally, he'd been practically limp for weeks, but he supposed that was what happened when you tore right up to your balls. Noticing a rather severe looking woman scowling at them, he pushed Levi away. Confused at first, Levi put two and two together for him   
"You must be Ms Belmont?"  
"Mr Ackerman? I wasn't aware that you'd have someone joining you"  
Probably because no one expected omegas to do anything  
"This is my husband, Eren"  
Belmont didn't look impressed  
"Shall we take a look at the property? Would your, omega, prefer to wait in the car?"  
"Omega" was practically a sigh of annoyance. Leaving Eren frowning at the woman, while Levi moved between them  
"My husband will be joining us. We are looking to purchase the property together"  
"Right. I must warn you, the building hasn't been opened in months, and is being sold in its current condition..."

Following Levi up the stairs, he still didn't know what to think about all of this. He didn't particularly want to walk into the hotel, but Belmont could fucking jump if she thought he'd roll over and wait in the car. Waiting for him at the top of the stairs, Levi took his hand   
"Even if this isn't the place, it's ok"  
"You wouldn't have chosen it if you didn't like it. I know what you're like, Levi"  
"Ok. I narrowed it down, and this one seemed most manageable and it's already been cleared of asbestos. It's also in a nicer location"  
Eren shot him a glare. He wasn't going to be swayed by... holy fuck... there was a fucking chandelier. No. He was definitely not going to be swayed by shiny things  
"... the interior design was heavily influenced by the art nouveau movement, while the original building its self was erected in 1970..."  
God. This Belmont woman sucked at her job. Her voice filled with disinterest, despite the fact the power actually fucking worked and things were kind of cool. It'd obviously been broken into, mirrors smashed, and spray painting across walls. Wait... Tugging his husband back, he frowned  
"1970. That makes it... 54?"  
Belmont answered his whisper   
"It does. There was a fire, destroying the top floors, and ultimately destroying the top 4 floors. It was rebuilt 7 years later, operations of the hotel ended in 1996. The property chanced numerous hands since. As I've explained to your husband"  
Growling softly, Levi whispered  
"Don't let her get to you..."  
"I feel stupid"  
"You're not. I didn't explain everything to you"  
"Mr Ackerman, would you like to see the evening parlour"  
Levi nodded, Belmont turn and walking towards the door that read "bar". With her back to them, Levi bowed to him  
"Eren, would you care to join me in the Evening Parlour?"  
Levi's phoney accent was more than a little funny. Nodding, his husband lifted his hand, like they did in the old movies when the men led the women to the dance floor  
"Shall we sip scotch? Or shall it be champagne, my love?"  
"Man... a bar where omegas can drink safely... I would have got up to so much trouble... if I like, could have"  
"Maybe we should ditch the bar?"  
"But... my champagne?"  
"I'll buy you as much as you like"  
"Ooooh? You better not tell my husband"  
"He's a fool. No sane alpha would let you out of their sights"

"Mr Ackerman. I am a busy woman. If you're not interested..."  
Eren covered his snicker. Levi, however, merely took it in his stride  
"Sorry, we were discussing if this building is suitable for our needs. Like I said. We are interested in buying a property together. If my husband isn't satisfied, I'm not"  
Eren looked away. Knowing he was being swept away by Levi. This was an absolutely massive project, that he really couldn't see happening. But his words has also come back to haunt him. He had told Levi he'd support him, so he had to push aside his hatred of Belmont  
"Yes. Of course. As I was saying, this is the Evening Parlour"

The hotel was nice in its own way. The bathrooms were kind of gross from disuse, but Eren fully supported the idea of a shower over a bath. It'd help with cramping during heat, and he loved the older style of bath with its big claw feet. The rooms had been stripped, and needed a complete makeover... but they'd fit a double bed, and a fridge... No. Nope. He was getting swept away again. It was hard to keep looking at the hotel so objectively. After the bar, they'd headed to the top floor. He hated the modern feel of it, but again, there was a but. Levi had so many ideas for the space. Talking about how they could live there. Eren didn't have the heart to tell him no. Yes. It was way bigger than their apartment, with plenty of natural light, or there would have been if the windows weren't crusted with dust. When he imagined Levi's personal hell, it was a dusty and grimy place like this... and they reached his personal hell. Joining into the kitchen was a basement. The moment he saw the steps leading down into an inky blackness, his chest seized. Levi hadn't mentioned there would be a basement... and he could have decked his husband for it  
"Eren?"  
Backing away, he bolted back through the hotel. Not stopping until he was heaving his guts up by the front steps. It'd been years... he shouldn't be this weak. He shouldn't feel so fucking afraid of a stupid room... but he was. It was he'd been bathed like smell of dirty water and decomposing rat. He'd never been this angry with Levi before. He hadn't warned him. He hadn't said anything. He'd let him wander around in the kitchen before fucking springing it on him... All he had to do was tell him... A creepy abandoned building with a creepy fucking basement. He... if he'd been... would Levi have left him down there?

Spiralling, Eren collapsed down onto the sidewalk. Clutching his chest as he shook his head. Levi wouldn't lock him down there. Levi wouldn't leave him to die. He wouldn't.... but... Whining deeply, he called for his alpha. He couldn't fucking breathe  
"Fuck"  
Whining again for Levi, his husband appeared. Taking his face in his hands, Eren knew he was supposed to focus on his breathing, and that he was supposed to focus on Levi. He was just too fucking scared to   
"Bright Eyes, you've got to breathe for me. You're ok. You don't have to go down there... I'm not going to make you go down there"  
"You... never... fucking... said..."  
"I know. I know. I'm sorry. I didn't think it'd be just there"  
Levi had known. Feeling like he couldn't breathe, he tried to push Levi back. It wasn't just that he couldn't breathe, it was the awful feeling that came before vomiting. Levi's shoes catching the brunt of it  
"Let it out. I'm sorry..."  
Fuck Levi and his wonderfully soft nature. He was angry at the arsehole... and shouldn't he be mad that his shoes were now ruined  
"I'm going to lock up now. Talk things through with your... husband. You have the office number"  
Fucking Belmont. He didn't appreciate her seeing him like this, but at least she was fucking off. Even Levi didn't reply to her. With his chest heaving, she'd long since left before his breathing came back under control. Brushing Levi off, Eren rose to his feet  
"Eren?"  
"I don't want to talk to you right now. I want to go home"  
"Eren..."  
"I want to go home, Levi"

The drive home was short, long and awkward all at the same time. Eren exhausted as fine tremors continued to run through his body. Trailing behind Levi, he felt weak and useless, and definitely not in the mood for Hanji as Levi let them into the apartment. Ignoring everything she said, he headed straight for the shower, determined to get the stink of stale water of his skin. Even he'd been taken back by how badly he'd reacted to a fucking doorway... Levi would probably want to talk about it. He'd probably even call Krista, and dob him over his meltdown... Fuck. He'd been letting himself get swept away. He wanted to scream out his frustration... Unfortunately, "fuck" wasn't a child friendly word, though it was barely seen as swearing these days. God. He'd reacted so badly. What was he supposed to say? "Yeah. Ok. Maybe I liked the hotel a little, but I don't know about living there, and hey, yeah. That basement, not happening". Like he could say that. Levi would try to make him see the positives. The space was big enough to take in omegas, and have Hanji's clinic like Levi had dreamed out... Maybe it was a good building... and he was what wasn't good? It was all too confusing. He needed a nap, and to calm down... He couldn't think, and he couldn't process anything at the moment.

 

*  
It was only a few days after they'd visited the hotel that Eren managed to surprise him. His husband had been so upset that he hadn't expected his omega to bring up the shelter again so soon. Especially with the hell of a nightmare Eren had had after they'd returned home. His husband had gone to nap, while Levi had been lectured by Hanji over how distress Eren had been. It wasn't like he could admit he'd scared his husband with an open door, and a set of stairs. It wasn't that long after he'd sent Hanji out to buy dinner that Eren had woken screaming. Rushing into their bedroom, his omega was drenched in sweat and throwing up. Trying to bring Eren back to reality, he received a split lip, before being kicked in the chest, then Eren had escaped. Falling backwards off their bed, with a loud thud. Three damn days later, it still hurt.

Coming out of their bedroom, Eren dropped down next to him with a sigh. Slinging his legs over his, Eren sighed again, as he rested his head against the sofa cushion. Levi turning off the TV, so give his omega his full attention   
"What's wrong?"  
"I want to talk"  
"About what?"  
"The hotel. I won't go in there. Not when there's a door on that basement. But... if you want this to happen, then I want to support you. But I'm not going back in there..."  
"Eren. I'm sorry, I didn't think it would scare you so badly"  
"I told you I couldn't..."  
Eren shook his head, before continuing   
"...Well it did. But I'm trying to think about all of this... without the basement. If you want to move ahead with this, then I'll support you. But that basement, it either has to go, or the door to it has to. And there have to be lights on down there all the time. And I'm not going down there"  
"You're ok, with going through with this?"  
"I was so fucking scared. But. Then I started thinking... Maybe if they'd had somewhere they could dump without any one asking questions... Maybe things would have been different?"  
Nick had to have had shelters under his control, in order to find his victims. Eren's foster parents could have dumped him and deserted him any time they would have liked...  
"I hate what you went through"  
"I finally have a good life. I'm not happy all the time, but it's good. And Nick, his money, I don't want it. He hurt so many omegas and nothing will make up for it, ever. I don't want to be cleaning up his mess"  
"We're not going to be. Shelters exist... this is just another one, but we're going to do it how they all should have been done"  
"I don't want my name on anything visible in the shelter. I don't want people I don't know, knowing me. Or, at least, anyone else. I just wanted to make things better for someone..."  
"And we can. But I can't do that, if you don't want this too"  
"I've thought about this really hard. And, I've made my choice. I'm going to give you 6 months. You have 6 months to sort this project out, and to follow it. But. If it impacts our family. Or if you're working too hard and the kids are suffering because of it, I'm leaving you"  
Levi blinked... 6 months wasn't exactly a lot of time when dealing with government agencies that liked to take their time to reply  
"Eren..."  
"No. You have 6 months, Levi. And I refuse to enter that hotel, until that door is gone and the place is cleaned through. I don't want to meet people from agencies. They're not going to help you, if they're busy judging me"  
"Eren. You're more than an omega. You're my husband. I want to do this, with my husband"  
"I'm telling you my counter offer. I might be stupid, and naive to how the world works, but I never know what to say. That's why you make the first contact. I don't know how to reach out and do that. And no red. None at all. Red and a basement, is asking for a horror story"  
"I don't want a horror story"  
"No "Shining" shit either. I fucking hate that movie"  
"No "redrum". Ok. I've looked at few other buildings, if you want to take a look?"  
This was supposed to be something for both of them. He's honestly thought Eren would be more into it all, but then again, to Eren it was all just a lousy hotel with a basement  
"No. This is your project. I need to work on me. And Viren's going to be starting daycare next year. I want him to be socialising, and having fun. Hanji's already half way through her pregnancy, and will be finishing up in 6 weeks, so if you're serious about her starting a clinic, you organised that with her..."  
"I have other papers, and ideas..."  
"And when you know what's what, then you'll tell me. I don't want to get invested for it to turn into nothing"  
"Ok... I would still like your name on the building deed. I know you don't want to be on papers and stuff, but I want this for both of us... I want the world to know that you're a strong omega, and that you're my husband"  
"And what happens if I'm on the deed?"  
"Well, it legally means you own realestate"  
"And?"  
"And I want you to have things of your own, or even part of them. Like this apartment, I've had you put on the deed to it. If something happens to me, then the apartment is yours. Like the shelter would be yours"  
"I don't know..."  
"You don't need to know right now. You can keep thinking about it. I'll answer any of your questions I can. I've also been thinking about the basement. We wouldn't have cameras in the hotel rooms, but we could set them up in the basement. That way you'd be able to everything happening down there"  
"Do we need cameras?"  
"We"... Eren said "we"... we had to mean together, right?  
"Only in case of accidents or assaults. Like I said. None in the rooms, but the foyer in case of angry alphas or betas, and the hallways in case anyone gets hurt. That way, there's evidence of whatever happens"  
"I don't know if I like the idea of cameras. I don't know if I can feel natural"  
"Eren, once you get used to them, you won't think about them. Also, it's for our safety, and Hanji's. If she had a violent patient and gets hurt, there needs to be evidence"  
"The cops won't do anything"  
Like Floch hadn't done anything...  
"They will, if we make it so they can't ignore them"  
"I'll follow you. But seriously, I'm not impressed. I told you I didn't want you staying up"  
Levi snorted, Eren's eyes narrowing in annoyance   
"I was watching TV and got distracted. I wasn't working on anything"  
"So you like TV, more than me?"  
"No. I didn't say that. It was so bad that I got caught up in it"  
"You're not making this better for yourself"  
"Sorry"  
"You're lucky Titan wanted snuggles, or I would have been out here to growl at you sooner"  
"You want snuggles?"  
"I want my husband to be involved in this family"  
"Point taken. I'm sorry. We can go to bed now?"  
"It's nearly time for the twins to wake up and demand food"  
"Rei is good like that"  
"He is. And don't forget. If you start neglecting the kids, I will leave"  
"Then I want you to yell at me each time I mess up. I'm serious, Eren. I want to do this for us, but not at the cost of us"  
"You might end up regretting that"  
"I might. But I think we've both had lives with far too many regrets. I'm sick of them"  
"So am I..."

Falling silent, Levi couldn't stand the quiet. Eren was obviously thinking about the shelter still. He could tell by the shifting hues of his husband's scent. He'd wanted Eren to help with the interior design plans, but his husband didn't want to, and he needed to respect that. Even if it the mammoth project had just become even bigger for him. Still, he couldn't complain. Eren was respecting his own limits, and choosing for himself to put himself first. Coaxing his husband slowly into his lap, he then rose from the sofa, Eren clinging to him   
"Levi?! What are you doing?"  
"You'll be more comfortable feeding Eli in bed, and I've got a bottle to make"  
"Is it your turn tonight?"  
"I don't know. But I like the idea of cuddling with the twins"  
"Mmm... That's better. I know it's hard to find the balance between work and family, but don't go forgetting us"  
"I won't. I promise you, that I won't"  
"Good. Now, take me to bed"  
"I'm on it"

 

*  
The shelter ended up being a much larger project than Levi had expected, and home life hadn't made it any easier. Viren had fallen off the jungle gym at the park, breaking his left arm. Eren's heat had been an arsehole, hitting a full 3 weeks before it was supposed to... it'd been fucking amazing, messy as hell and both of them had been too exhausted to move the next two days after it ended... with Eren's post heat depression not hitting until after a little medical intervention. They hadn't organised his contraceptive shot in time, so it'd been an emergency call to Mike and two small white pills for his husband. They'd tried to use condoms, but so caught up in each other and the pleasure of going at like rabbits all over the apartment... condoms hadn't always made it on his dick before Eren did. His heat had also hit at the worst time possible, as he'd had to ask Erwin to take over the meetings with the builders and renovators at the site. Erwin having quit, because Mike had quit... when Hanji quit. There was a whole heap of quitting, and a whole heap of input as the shelter project spiralled. Everyone seemed to have their own idea of how things should be, especially fucking Eyebrows, who didn't understand why they wouldn't have a door on the basement, or why they wouldn't have a full alpha staff. How the man managed to make it through the day without dying of stupidity, Levi would never know. When he'd told Eren about Erwin coming onto the project, his husband had straight up said no, not without being on suppressants. As if going without suppressants had ever been a viable option.

In December all their plans stalled again as Hanji gave birth to her second daughter. Anna completely in love with her the moment she'd laid eyes on her. Eren being her birthing partner again, because the omega was too polite to say no. Not that he'd minded. He now how two beautiful goddaughters. It'd helped take his mind off of everything, and Levi had enjoyed not being in trouble for working too hard... even though he was sure Eren preferred it when he wasn't home. The omega's mental health was still an issue, but keeping himself busy had helped to a degree. It wasn't like their was a magical cure to depression, anxiety or PTSD, thought medication would have helped, Eren preferred to keep breastfeeding, after his heat.

Despite having been given 6 months from the end of July, it was a full year before the dust settled, then another month making sure everything was absolutely perfect... during which time, Levi might have kept the new business sign on the facade finished. He was the only who knew the the name of the organisation he'd established in both his and Eren's names, as well as the only one who knew the new building name as well. Wall Rose didn't shout "omega shelter" to him, so it'd had to go. When things had started looking as if they'd take that long, Levi had made sure to get permission from Eren. The area that had been the "Evening Parlour", had been turned into Hanji's clinic, because getting a licence to serve beverages, and the requirements was too much fucking work... and it wasn't like they really needed a bar. While the top floor had been converted into an apartment twice the size of the one they had, a dance studio for Eren, and a small quarters for overnight staff. Eren might not have wanted to move, but for practicalities sake, it made more sense to Levi to turn into a homely and inviting place, given how much time would be spent there.

As it turned out, fate decided for them that they'd be moving into the old hotel.

Having kept everything under wraps, Levi finally brought Eren to see the hotel once the rooms were organised. And under the pretence of having his husband make sure everything was in place. Leaving the kids with Hanji, Eren was nervous and fidgety the whole drive. His husband had seen some of the work, on the rare occasions they had meetings that involved both of them signing off due to Eren's name being on the property deed, but his husband hadn't seen the hotel since the front sign went up, and honestly, Levi was more than a little excited to show him. Especially as the title would be so personal to Eren. Parking in front of the building, Levi climbed out the car, before jogging around and opening Eren's door for him. Slapping Levi off of him, though smiling, his husband followed him back around the car  
"What do you think?"  
"I think it's white"  
It was. White with alternating teal and orange window trims... the whole building looking so much more inviting than the hideous yellow  
"And the sign's covered?"  
"Yeah. Hanji's been a real in pain the arse over it, but I wanted you to be the first to see"  
"Why me?"  
"Because you're my husband... and because I think you'll understand once you see"  
Being prepared, revealing the sign above the doors meant a short trip up the ladder and pulling off the cloth draped over it. Levi's heart racing as he did. It was worse than pulling off a bandaid, not knowing how badly it would hurt. Ripping the cloth off, he pulled it down as he descended the ladder. Eren letting out a gasp loud enough for him to hear  
"Lee?! What is this?!"  
"I know this shelter is for all omegas, but it wouldn't have been possible without your bravery and courage in standing up to Nick"  
"But... what?! It... Lee..."  
Smiling at his husband, Levi pulled him into his arms. Both of them staring up at the large white sign  
"Dancing on The Wind,  
A safe shelter for all omegas,  
Operated under The Wings of Freedom Organisation"  
To the top right side of the Shelter name, two bird silhouettes were painted. One in maya blue, the other orange, with the birds the same as the ones painted along the top of the nursery walls at home. Sinking down in his arms, Eren sobbed against him  
"Lee... it's perfect..."  
"I thought so, but if you're already crying over the sign, you're going to cry once you see the mission statement on the door"  
"Oh... what does it say?"  
"Why don't we have a look, together?"  
"I don't know if I can"  
"I'm pretty sure you can"  
"I..."  
"Eren, you came into my life and changed absolutely everything. I can't picture a life without you, and every time you see this sign, I want you to know how much I love you"  
"I... don't deserve this"  
Levi smiled fondly, kissing Eren's temple. His husband had a long way to go, but he'd never love another like he loved Eren   
"Eren, you deserve the whole world. You're my whole world... now, I want to welcome you to our shelter. Our safe place, for all kinds of omegas"  
Guiding a shaky Eren up the stairs, his husband couldn't stop crying, and unable to read the mission printed on the front door  
"A refuge in which we leave the labels behind. Empowering, supporting, educating and encouraging omegas to reach their full potential"  
Eren's fingers traced over the letters, as he sniffled  
"What does the rest of it say?"  
"That this is a safe shelter. Unauthorised alphas are not permitted, nor will we tolerate acts of violence towards the omegas on the premises. This is your one and only warning"  
"Lee..."  
"Come on. This is just the beginning"

Showing Eren around the renovated hotel, Levi was proud. His alpha even prouder. Every little thing he'd chosen had been with Eren in mind, even when it clashed with the requests of the others. They'd been able to cut down on costs with government grants and funding, though he had borrowed against the apartment to make sure they had enough cash to fall back on when inevitable wrinkles showed up. His husband wouldn't go into the kitchen, but that was something to work up to, and Levi was proud that Eren had at least stuck his head in to take a quick look. Working their way up, Levi explained everything to his husband. How the key lock system worked. Where each camera was located. What was in each bathroom, and were extra toiletry supplies were. The blankets were all based on the brands of Eren's favourite and most used, each room was a white canvas, with large cork boards for omegas to pin to posters and such. The third floor had been designed more for omegas staying long term, rather than ones seeking a safe place to spend their heats. Each room also had a blanket that was "gifted" to the user of the room. Something small they could call their own. In the lobby, there was a place for clothes donations, for omegas who had nothing, and they'd been working with a few second hand stores to set up vouchers for omegas who had nothing at all.

By the time they reached the top apartment, Eren was babbling about the amazing job they'd all done and how he was sorry for not helping, but incredibly proud of the job they'd done. Saving the dance space for last, Levi showed him the staff quarters. The intercom beside the front door was linked to the the intercom in the room, so the doors could be safely locked at night. From there, he led Eren into the massive apartment. With five rooms, two bathrooms, an open kitchen/dining/ living area, and it's own seperate laundry, it was so much bigger than Levi could have hoped for. The master bedroom was special. Only he and Eren had the keys for it, and Levi had ditched the 4 plain white walls approach. The wall behind the bed was painted in the colours of the ocean. Colours taken from Eren's photos of Paradis Beach. His husband finally snapped when they reached their. Levi found himself pushed down on the queensized bed, as a very happy Eren made his feelings shown... it didn't even matter to his husband that the bed wasn't made. Eren's hands all over him as he rushed to rid him of his clothes.

The sex was hard and fast, Eren riding him as he praised him. Outside his heat, Eren still wasn't comfortable showing him his stomach. His husband still struggling with his body, despite it being well over a year since giving birth. Bringing them both to orgasm, Eren was all kisses as he collapsed forward, chest to chest. It's been a while since Eren had truly been this happy about anything, leaving him feeling like was being swept away.

It took another round of sex for Eren to be satisfied, not that Levi minded. His omega was absolutely stunning, and when he smiled... he knew he was the luckiest alpha in the world. It wasn't until they'd both come down from their high, that Eren remembered the other room on the floor. His husband begging to know what was behind the door, while Levi was just trying to keep his cool. He was knotted inside Eren, after all. And each wriggle from his perfect mate brought with it the jostling of his knot... and with all the work going into organising the shelter for its grand opening had meant a distinct slump in their sex life... even with two heats, and a half heat since Eren had given birth in their bedroom. Cleaning themselves up. Levi switched to piggybacking Eren around. His husband wouldn't stop pressing kisses to his shoulder as he did... until they reached the dance studio. He knew absolutely nothing about dancing, so had been forced to contact Sasha, who was surprisingly easily brought with food. There were full floor to ceiling length mirrors, as well as two fully fitted stripper poles. The audio system could be linked up to Eren's phone, and the whole room was sound proof. Eren was completely speechless, but Levi wasn't done with the surprises. The hotel was finished, and it was time to plan their proper wedding. Especially now they had the perfect venue, according to Eren.

 

Planning their wedding together took up most of their time after opening the shelter. It took a few days before they had their first omega come in. A timid little woman who'd seen their advertising on social media. As exciting as it was to finally have an actual omega there, the woman had unfortunately been to a bad shelter before. She expected to be hurt or to pay with sex, and it'd taken a whole afternoon with Eren for her to calm and accept that they didn't want anything from her. It wasn't long after that, that they started getting more and more omegas. Especially when Hanji began to openly advertise that her clinic was specialising in omega health, and the health of their children. It wasn't easy. The first medical emergency they'd had left Eren in tears, an abused omega that hadn't even had the strength to get through the doorway. For Eren, it'd been like looking at himself. With everything happening, it wasn't until November that their plans came together, and all that was left was paying off the deposits. Levi over cake completely, but Eren loved sugar and he loved his husband's face lighting up as they'd tried dozens of different flavours.

Eren's dream wedding falling on the 14th of January. Viren now 5, and a force to be reckoned with. Hanji hadn't been able to help herself, as she whisked Eren away to organise his tuxedo... and again for his hen's night. Mike had been in charge of Levi's buck's night, leaving Levi feeling like he'd gotten the better deal as they'd gone paint balling, before bar hopping. His buck's night falling the night before Eren's hen's night, so his omega could spend the morning of their wedding dressing without the twins, or Viren, interrupting. Especially Viren. His curious nature had beaten the child proofing of their apartment. He'd even figured out he could drag a chair to the door to undo the chain, and the door bolt. He'd then become particularly fond of letting Titan out. Both twins were also on their feet, being 21 months and 20 months respectively. This time he'd been there for their first babbles word of "mama", and their first steps. Rei surprising them all by beating Eli by a whole two months to "walk". Perhaps that was why Titan was so happy to escape the apartment? Though it never lasted more than a few seconds as he'd meow pathetically to come back in.

With the lobby of the hostel as see of white lilies, and the wedding party limited to around 20 or so people, their wedding had been small and intimate. Despite all her efforts, Eren had worn the black tux he'd wanted, and looked exquisite as he had. The smile on his husband's lips was contagious as they renewed their vows, though this time they were the traditionally version. Purely because this wedding was more for everyone else than themselves. Eren didn't want to customise their vows, because he wanted the things they'd said to each other in the hallway of the church, to stay between the five of them... though, Eld and Gunther probably would have forgotten the words anyway... even if they were their witnesses again. Mike was Eren's best man, while Erwin had been his. Viren had been ringbarer, Anna the flower girl, while Hanji was on babysitting duty, given her second daughter, Molly, was still breastfeeding. When the ceremony was finished, the double doors to the dining area were opened wide for the reception. Eren purring so hard that he could barely thank everyone wishing them well. He felt like everything was a dream, and he still wasn't completely sure that the shelter was real. Levi had done such an amazing job, that if he were to wake and find himself back in their apartment, he wouldn't be surprised.

Dancing their first dance to a rather unconventional song, Levi couldn't stop kissing Eren. With his husband's arms draped over his shoulders, their were lip to lip as they slow danced. Again... Levi had asked for Sasha's help with the basics. He'd even learned how to do the fancy spins... not that he was bragging about it. Sighing happily, Eren kissed his lips for what must have been the thousandth time that day  
"Happy, Brat?"  
"You have no idea. I've got something to tell you"  
"Mmm? If it's that you love me, I hate to break it to you, but I love you too"  
"I do love you, but that's not quite it"  
"Oh?"  
Lowering his right hand, Eren took his. Pressing it to his stomach with a shy smile   
"I know it's unplanned. But my heat's late... I took a test this morning and now you're the first person I've told"  
"You're..."  
"Yeah. So, I guess we're moving into the hotel..."  
"Are you... Are you sure?"  
The twins weren't even two. They'd been careful... especially after Eren's first heat. They kept up with his injections... and he had no idea how this could have possibly happened. Not that he wasn't happy... but he was also fucking terrified. Two hard pregnancies would do that. And even if their relationship was in a much better place, it still wasn't going to be easy...  
"Yeah, Levi. I still have a whole lot to work through, but I'm pregnant again. You're going to have to get a vasectomy or something. Your come is just too potent"  
"Would it bother you, if I did?"  
"No... but can we wait until make an appointment before planning what comes next? We've had false alarms before, and if the pup isn't healthy, I don't think I can go through what we did with Rei"  
"I wouldn't ask, or expect you to. I know we vaguely talked about it..."  
"Yeah. But this is it for me. After this baby, I don't want to fall pregnant again... unless it's another boy. I'd love to have a daughter with you"  
"Eren. No. This is your body. I am not with you for children. Don't look so scared. You're my world. And I understand. As sexy as you are pregnant, we can't have a whole football team"  
"Well, we probably could. But I don't think I could keep up with it. I'm getting old"  
"You're getting old? You're only 27 this year"  
"I'd planned to try for a baby if we hadn't had a girl by the time I hit 30. I still don't know how it happened, but we're good, right?"  
"We're so much better than where we were with the twins, and I would love to move in here with you. When you're ready"  
"I'm ready. I'm more than ready. This. All of this. It's my dream come true. Every single thing you do, I fall more and more in love with you"  
Levi snorted softly  
"And I keep falling more in love with you. I can't believe we're having another pup"  
"I know. And it's scary as hell, so I'll be counting on you"  
"And I'll support you. Like you've supported me"  
"I don't know. I left all of this to you, and you built a whole building that screams how much you love me"  
"Because I do"  
"And we're going to grow old together. We'll be one of those disgustingly loved up old couples that have matching walking frames, and disturb our family with all our kisses"  
"And all our sex. Just because I'm getting old, doesn't mean I still can't destroy this sweet arse of yours"  
"I look forward to it... though I expect you to make the effort of riding me, no matter the bad knees and hips"  
"Like I'd ever say no to that"

When their dance came to an end, they did the rounds. Marco and Jean were there, with Mina, Anka and their youngest daughter Tilly. Krista and Ymir were there. With government funding, and Krista's help, they'd been able to find a therapist to work with omegas for "free". Meaning the government was footing the bill for the appointments. Sasha and Connie were there. Sasha giving Eren shit over his sloppy frame while dancing, Connie backing her up as she did. Armin and Mikasa were there, both with their own partners. Mikasa still seemed to think of Levi as too lowly for Eren, but that was her problem. Nanaba had come stag. Petra and Olou were huddled towards the back of the room. Olou rushing to please Petra, while Petra kept her inner bitch inside. Mike, Erwin and Eld had found some bizarre way to keep their three way relationship going. Gunther had brought a date with him. Levi and Eren both promptly forgetting her name, and softly laughing over it once they'd moved on. Hanji, but they skipped her as Eren had been with her all morning, and she was busy with Molly. Anna, Viren, Rei and Eli were "dancing" together. There were a few other people from Levi's days a paramedic, and a few from Eren's dance days. And the numbers were rounded out by a few omegas they had in their care. Eren had done the rounds to carefully explain that they were having their wedding there, and to invite all of them to celebrate. Some were too scared, but it was nice to see a couple had braved coming down. They'd taken on a massive task. A task Levi never thought they would. He'd never wanted to be responsible for people's lives, even as a paramedic. It was a stupid thing to think, but the deaths of Isabel and Farlan had been the start of his chance. He'd been stuck in his seed pod until Eren had come along, and helped him grow, before blooming. Not that he'd say any of that shit like that. He had his pride after all... and fuck. He was so fucking proud.

Looking around and drinking in the sight of everyone having a good time, he wrapped both arms around Eren. Staring into his bright green eyes, as he kissed him softly. Yeah. He was so fucking proud of what they'd achieved, and excited to see how Eren surprised him next. Eren was right. Things weren't always perfect, they fought, they yelled and screamed, and both still had nightmares, and regular monthly appointments with Krista... but he was still so fucking proud. With Eren by his side, they could change the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now... the end has been left open for you to all imagine what comes next. You can imagine if Levi and Eren finally have their little girl, or if they have another boy... which would be even more chaos IMO. Imagine Eren trying to run a house hold of alpha males.
> 
> I did write this with the mental head canon that all the boys would be alphas, and very protective of their mum. But like I said, it's an open ending.
> 
> Thank you all so much for coming on this ride! I appreciate every single comment, bookmark and Kudos... and I'm so very grateful you took the time to read this.  
> I love you, all.


End file.
